#and yes i did read through the entire wikipedia article on schloss linderhof

[basicallyjustmuggleremuslupin]

OKAY HI

is there any chance you remember Mark?

If not, here's a refresher: Mark is this vampire who mixes slang from three centuries mercilessly and wears priceless Victorian waistcoats with tracksuit bottoms with no shame.

(I didn't remember his name lol, had to check)

Anyway, so Mark is moving. He lives in this beautiful castle built by Ludwig || in Bavaria. Now, Ludwig is know as the fairy tale king and his palaces were built to fit such a title.

Mark is moving to a condo for a couple of reasons

He never bothered to learn German

The castle is just cold

Every so often a kid comes across it and he has to silence them or whatever

There is no closet space left

However, now Mark has to sell off said castle. First, though, he needs to make up some lies to tell the realtor about why the locals think is cursed, why the entryway carpet has a few stains that look weirdly like dried blood- you know what? I'll make you a list.

Why the locals have the strange idea his home is cursed

Why the entryway carpet has a few stains the look somewhat like dried blood

Why all the bins are overflowing with empty bottles of sunscreen

Why there are priceless victorian outfits in incredible condition stuffed into the backs of closets and under chairs

Why there is no food in the kitchen

Why every so often a kid goes missing when they come poking around

How the castle had stayed in his family for centuries

Why the lack of modern elements such as electricity?

Honestly there's probably more but that's pretty long already.

Anyway, I hope you'll excuse my antics and my procrastination techniques (I should be editing rn)

omg hi, i'm genuinely dying for these random asks about mark ahhh

(also i didn't exactly remember the name but the moment i read 'vampire who mixes slang from three centuries' it all came back to me)

omg, i imagine that would be a big issue lmao

so, my answers are probably not the most creative ones but i imagine they would work:

so, hundreds of years ago, there lived a very bad person in the castle, who would rule over bavaria. said person would take a large amount of food from the farmers that lived there as payment in exchange for him to protect them all with his soldiers. but, as one can probably imagine, some years crops are very good and some years... well, not so. so in a year when the people barely had anything to eat, they still had to give away a huge amount to the ruler, most people had to give more than they had, so that they had to give up their houses and farm animals and were practically homeless, leading to many many deaths. whoever was able to survive ran away to better lands. when the ruler finally died, with no heirs of their own, mark's ancestors moved in and live slowly came back to the lands. it is said, that to this day, the ruler's spirit still lives in the walls of this very castle. but obviously, this is impossible. mark has lived there for hundreds- i mean, his family has lived there for hundreds of years and there has never been an unexplainable noise or movement or whatever. i mean, how would that even be possible to still be somewhat alive after hundreds of years, right? right?? so, it's obviously just a little ghost story that people tell each other on a dark autumn night with the only purpose being to scare each other.

oh, so that's fun story actually. you see, there was this ball, not too long ago, where lots of influential people met up. it was very unofficial tho so that no one really knew about it unless they were invited. basically just a little party amongst themselves. you see, since he moved into the castle, mark had access to more aristocratic rows of society. as it so happens, some people got into a fight, as in physically. unfortunately, while they were tumbling to the ground as a bundle of various bodies, they knocked over a table holding red wine in several glasses. said table, unfortunately, stood at this place near the entryway carpet and was knocked onto that. as red wine is known for, it is very difficult to erase out of a carpet, and until today, a final solution has not been found, except for maybe throwing out the entire carpet, which obviously would be a shame as it's rather vintage and worth a large amount of money.

so, since we're talking about a castle built by ludwig II of bavaria, i'm going to assume we're talking about schloss linderhof/linderhof castle, since it was ludwig's favorite castle of his. the castle has several huge gardens and parks and with that come several good spots to sunbathe (for example around the water parterre). with the opportunity for the guests of schloss linderhof to use such sunbathing spots came also the luxury of getting sunscreen for free, since the residents of the castle obviously had to take care of their guests and their health. however, the disposal of those bottles was an issue, so that they were found stashed in a little room, which was so rarely used that nobody noticed them even being there until a few days ago, when all the rooms and itinerary were checked for good. but of course, they will be disposed of before the castle will be sold.

as was established earlier, the castle was the location of several balls over the years. as some balls are known for, a number of visitors tended to change their clothes for the several stages of these balls, for example for eating they had a set of clothes and for dancing they had another. some, very irresponsible, people left their clothes behind, which had the tendency of laying in rather unfortunate places due to the recent cleaning of the castle.

as a castle with a certain reputation, the castle had a great number of cooks. lately, however, mark has spent the majority of his time outside the castle with his boyfriend and at his place. therefore, there was hardly any use to having cooks and food, which would go off eventually. therefore, he sent the cooks away and had them take the food with them for themselves and their families.

since the castle is old and huge, there are plenty of chances of a child going missing on the premises without mark even noticing that the child is even there. there are several hidden places and in the gardens, there is always the possibility of children falling down trees that they try climbing or hills that they want to run up. especially around the music pavilion in the northern part there are many trees, which can make a person get lost, especially a little child. so, even when they know that a child has gone missing on the premises and everyone starts looking for them, the chances are very small for them to actually find them. of course, children should rather listen to the numerous signs telling outsiders to stay off the premises. unfortunately, several children choose to ignore them, in part because they do dares based on the ghost story explained in 1, in which they have to go onto the premises in order to show their friends that they're brave.

as established before, after the bad ruler had died the castle fell into mark family's hands. they were then introduced into the higher parts of society and soon became an influential family themselves. nowadays, everyone was very content with them taking care of the 'haunted' castle, so that they never found a reason to change the owning family.

that's a very simple question, really. since the castle is so old and has a very rich history on its own, mark's family has always tried to limit the changes made as far as possible in order to keep its inherent oldness. hence, there were never any changes to rather modern features. it was all to preserve the charm of the old castle as it was hundreds of years ago.

this was sooo much fun!! i love helping mark out, so if there is anything more i can help with, feel free to tell me :)

also, let's pretend that ludwig II lived hundreds of years earlier than he actually did, cause otherwise it doesn't make much sense what i wrote haha

also this really makes me want to visit schloss linderhof lmao