#angsty alcina is my lifeblood

[blood-red-ocean]

It is 1am, I am half asleep, here's some thoughts about Alcina that have me in a goddamn chokehold

- Alcina tensing up when her mortal touches her on the cheek for the first time and it's the first soft and gentle touch she's gotten for over a hundred years or maybe ever

- Alcina being confused at how someone so small and fragile could possibly feel safe around her considering she could break their arm with one hand

- Alcina getting restless when her mortal isn't around and then becoming agitated when she realises that for the first time she misses someone and how could she possibly miss a mortal when she's killed so many

- Alcina looking into a mirror and frowning at her reflection as she tries to see in herself what her mortal sees in her

- Alcina silently panicking because she can't figure out if that was her mortal on the balcony last time she mutated or if it was just her imagination

- Alcina panicking even more when she finds out it WAS her mortal and what was her mortal doing out in the cold like that anyway

- Alcina mentally preparing for her mortal to request to leave the Castle and trying to learn to be okay with that because why wouldn't her mortal want to leave after seeing her like that

- Alcina not moving for hours after her mortal climbs into her lap and falls asleep against her, the ultimate form of trust, after telling Alcina that she's beautiful in every form and context

- Alcina putting her hand V E R Y gently on her mortal's back as she sleeps and silently vowing to protect this one

- Alcina realising that she loves her mortal and throwing her desk across her room (again) in a rage because she can't possibly love someone, she's never loved someone in all her 100+ years

- Alcina spending weeks coming up with the best way to tell her mortal while also sending herself into an overthinking spiral because oh god what if someone else gets their hands on her mortal before she has a chance to tell them

- Alcina spending weeks coming up with the perfect way to tell her mortal and before she even gets a word out her mortal just kisses her and says 'I know. I'm in love with you, as well.'

- Alcina gets her happily ever after in the most unexpected way and her daughters have never seen her genuinely smile as much as they have after that moment