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#anytime i express happiness that fp2 talked to me ( which ties into a fear that i have about fps not speaking to me for days at a time )
rabitzzz
·
1 year
Text
avoiding talking to my fp about feelings by ignoring them again peace and love on planet earth
#vent post
#sorry i just
#' let me be selfish this once ' i . always try
#i dont know how to convince her that im not leaving
#anytime i express happiness that fp2 talked to me ( which ties into a fear that i have about fps not speaking to me for days at a time )
#( thanks jay )
#he gets upset and immediately thinks ive just . replaced her as someone special in my life
#when honestly at this point i dont think i could ever live without him ? really ??
#i dont know what i can do to finally make her realize that no matter what im literally still always talking to him at the end of the day
#even when we fight even if someone else had my attention even when i have a partner thats not him
#i dont know what to do and its scary and people are so terrifying i dont want her upset over me time and time again
#he really needs to find a new fp or just try not to care about me so much because 1 ) im not something that should be cared about in the -
#- first place and 2 ) i clearly just keep directly upsetting her over and over so im not good for him whatsoever
#even if im not doing it on purpose he splits directly because of me and when i split at her its because ive let things stack up without -
#- handling them for too long so its more like misdirected rage because im such a high strung person
#i dunno man im just
#one of my fps hardly talks to me and the other is too attached to me im stuck in a hell of my own creation
#might call the crisis line again its such a time
#man i so totally really love december nothing bad EVER happens in december !!!!
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