#anyway im supposed to be working on my assignment - AND I AM - but the frontal lobe is responsible for attention behaviour selection and

[nerdie-faerie]

Maybe I don't need a brain transplant, just lobotomise my frontal lobe

[bastardguy]

real talk how can you be unconscious yet, conscious at the same time. like woah im doing stuff but also i dont exist i am not here. like damn i am just trying to complete that pokedex in sun and moon while my soul is havin a radical outta body experience. like deaddass broski i feel like im falling behind constantly. i do not feel like a real person i do not feel like i exist in the eyes of others. well to be honest that's just kimda my own fault isn't it? im tired of waitin around for nothin and i see everyone saying that they're glad they stayed and hell im glad they stayed but damn man oh man i needa keep making stuff for myself to convince my fucked up failure of a self from fuckin electrocuting myself in the rain. set goals set goals start a project start a project play these games try to talk and reach out at least once a week start making an amv shower every three days do them assignments pet your dog walk around you matter you matter you matter you matter oHHHHH BOY they all only work for only such a short time but truthfully man i dunno what i want. i left tge age of 13 with no desire to stay alive and gere i am 5 years later in, a worse condition then i was before. it seems that everytime i try to do something it bites me in the arse huh? i suppose i wouodve ended it anyways if i never did anything so maybe i shouldn't even be here right now but man. maan oh man am i tired of everything. am i tired of finally getting myself to reach out to someone i know i probably wouldn't bother then only to fucking black out for days on end and ghost them. so, fucking shitty of me. so fucking stupid of me. i am literally typing this out in front my mom trying really hard not to fucking cry and that is really funny now that i think about it. i really don't deserve to have any friends if all i do is taking them for granted god just disappear it'll be so much easier if i just erased myself and not have to deal with this shit anymore i curse thee frontal lobe i curse thee i curse thee agahhagaahgsgaggagzgxnxhx God god god god alright. im going to upload the funny pokemon art i somehow spawned in. goodbye you're so hot and sexy i love you