#at the heb i go to though they do have some of that canned bubble tea

[drasticdoodling]

becoming an adult changed me. now perhaps my absolute favorite part of meal prep is making a Fancy Little Drink. i thought the hardest part about doing all my own meal prep and shopping would be to eat healthy, but the hardest part is resisting the siren song of yet another thing of tea or drink mix

[pushermania]

First of all I want to say that I love you all. Every single one of you. Everyone who sits and listens to my scheisser. I appreciate you a lot. I do these more as an exercise to keep myself up on new sounds, and for the past half a year or so I didn't do shit. This self isolation is making me realize that even more. I pretty much self isolated myself already, and I don't mean that as a meme or a cliche, I really kind of did. Going out lost it's luster unless I was in another country, HEB was already my social gathering place, even though I knew no one there, it was still a spot I could go and be present with the people. Live shows and casual nights out were killed by the voices of random people talking loudly about nothing or just utterly worthless things. I treasure my friends and my family and long to be in the presence of you all, but I let the general public get me way too down. And the raver bullshit people started to lump in with rap music put me over the edge. I couldn't listen to even a friend's demo for fear that they had fallen into the trap. For fear that the Xanax monster got them as well. I couldn't take it, I really couldn't take it. And now here we are locked in our homes (but still hitting the HEB) sleeping until noon (if you are lucky, or the above pictured Elena) watching tv and crying about our isolation. Fools! If you have a roof and some walls and some windows and some water and food you are already doing better than a lot of the population. Use this time wisely to clear your mind and explore your soul. It's ok to be afraid. I am fucking scared as hell for me and you and everyone else. But in the end, and this will end, maybe we can all come out smarter and stronger. I love all of you who have been keeping us entertained from your homes via social media. This is about what I can do right now, release a mix here and there. This one as always is quite a mess, but also beautiful in it's messiness. I play my friends, I play Cumbias from little USB's that my daughter brought me from Colombia, we get noisy, we get Irie, we go all over the world, which is what each and every one of us should do once this shit is over. Travel, see everything, meet people everywhere. Stay alive. I truly love you all and pray for this world every day. And night. (No Kid Cudi) XoxoxoxoX matt

Pushermania's Playlist- SELF ISOLATION MIX 2 - March 31, 2020

DJ Zinc & Alical Harley - Bubble Gradur - Ne Reviens Pas Calvin Harris & Dua Lipa - One Kiss Boom Baptist - RazzleDazzle Quin NFN - All Blues Run The Jewels - Yankee and The Brave Run The Jewels ft Greg Nice and DJ Premier - OohLaLa

Chronixx - Dela Move Sani - Three Fugue - Drowsiness IZ - Cradle - Live at Cafe Oto - Thanks to Old HeavenBooks Private Service - Change Nature Toiret Status #80 Toiret Status - #49 Tapefeed - FPOT (Answer Code Request Remix) Exumbo - No Fimmaker - Pit of Souls (Opal Tapes)

Dos Generaciones - Colombia Tierra Querida D.R.A. - La Pollera Colora Pilar - Sonora Dinamita Los Blanco - Sabrosa La Magdalena - Los Alegres Diablos Los Tupamaros - Noche de Cumbia Juan Pena - La Nina

B LA C K I E - They Feed On The Living Doula - Struggler Doula - Respite Shit & Shine - Kentucky Cell Phone

Kill The Giants - Fake News

[outpunched-blog1]

Ich Heb Ab

Von Kaiser takes a moment to reflect in the midst of a tense situation. 

This can also be read on Archive of Our Own

The train-ride over to the park had been quiet. That wasn't too abnormal, but every now and again you'd hear people chatting, or someone chuckling, or a child, or a fully-grown man fall asleep and begin snoring.

No, today's 'quiet' had just been somber silence.

Von Kaiser believed this to be both respectable and far too out-of-the-ordinary for his comfort. The reason he had decided to leave for the park in the first place was the hope that he would be able to relax and forget the worries he harboured, but it seemed they followed him wherever he went... Or perhaps that was too self-centered a thought. It wasn't that the worry followed him, it was that the whole of Germany (and many other nations) were encapsulated by it.

Kaiser could brood for hours on the train-ride alone, and it seemed as if his mind truly wanted to focus on that for as long as possible-- It was a better problem to think about than the one that caused it. It felt a bit awkward for the boxer to sit-back on his bench and tell himself, mentally, to get rid of those thoughts.

He tried, and tried again.

It wasn't working, so, he told himself out-loud this time.

That wasn't working, either.

Frustration bubbled-up in the man's chest, and that on-top of anxiety was a destructive combo.

Nothing was in his control. Something had gone wrong, and now everything followed. He couldn't even help himself, how would he fix anything else? What could he do to fix the problem in--

"Tag, Viktor."

The thoughts were dispelled immediately at the sound of a voice. It was an older gentleman, clad in only his trousers. He must have been sunbathing, noted Kaiser, which was not uncommon for many people, let alone this man in particular. "Guten Morgen, Herr Becker. Das Wetter ist Sonnig, ja?" Kaiser knew him since he was sixteen-- from the bakery that the boxer frequented. Now the old man was retired, but certainly no less present in his life.

This familiarity made it easy to start a conversation, though it was dull and dry as ever. Neither man seemed to have a problem with this.

They spoke back-and-forth for a while, and Von Kaiser had only realized how long that 'while' had been once the talking lulled and Mr. Becker brought-up the topic that had been at the forefront of Kaiser's mind since he'd awoken that morning. He wasn't much one for talking, but now he wished Mr. Becker would go back to prattling-on about playing frisbee with his friends in the Englischer Garten.

Kaiser listened, tense and silent as Mr. Becker continued-on about how much of a travesty it was, and how sad his family is, and how uneasy he is.

Easy-enough for him to say. He didn't have anyone he cared about near the travesty.

As if reading Kaiser's mind, the elderly man quieted-down, dim eyes analyzing the other's stance. "Du bist steif. Wie geht es deinem Freund?"

"Ich habe keine Ahnung, Herr Becker." "Ah... es tut mir Leid."

After that, another bout of silence. It was not helping. Mr. Becker appeared to be quite observant today, however, as he soon gave a small 'Tschuss' to Von Kaiser and left to leave the park for the day.

So once again, the Berliner was left to his thoughts. The harshness and self-deprecation within them had not left during that momentary distraction. They just resumed as if nothing happened.

'You are anxious and nervous, Kaiser. Men should not let stress get to them. It is pathetic.'

Pathetic? Was he pathetic? That could very-well be the case. He's been through so much, and yet, a man who's only talent is dancing had surpassed him within the WVBA. He's experienced so many things, and yet, a mere child who loads horseshoes into his boxing gloves is two circuits before him.

Sure, he could fight those two. The chances of winning weren't completely inconceivable, and yet, his rank and record pleaded otherwise.

The only person people would expect him to be able to beat is a malnourished, old French boxer.

...

Pathetic? Perhaps.

But what good is living if your only choices are that and apathetic?

"Ein Mann sein, verdammt sein. Verdammt sein." He muttered, allowing himself to finally sit-back against the wood bench. His head lowered, eyes staring at his rough, worn hands. Below them were dandelions, new and bright. And even below them was green and brown grass, and even further below was dirt, chock-full of more life than people could imagine.

Von Kaiser bent forwards, a finger and a thumb plucking a once-living dandelion from it's stem. He turned-over the pesky plant in his fingers, examining it though his thoughts were elsewhere.

It was far too easy for someone to take a life, he mused.

Before he could mull on that thought process for long, though, a quick vibration came from his hip. Dropping the dandelion to the ground, Kaiser straightened-out, patting either pocket to locate his phone before doing so and pulling it out. His brows had furrowed, and they furrowed deeper while he was reading the new message on the screen.

'[yes we are fine please do not worry. thank you for your voicemail im sorry i could not pick up. call me later please.]'

The message was brief and simple, but it gave Kaiser an immeasurable amount of relief. His stomach relaxed, and his shoulders lightened. He hadn't even realized how rigid his posture was or how tense he'd been. Considering his usual stance, that was saying something.

Kaiser melted back onto the bench, allowing himself the rest this one time. The phone was placed on his thigh, two hands reaching upwards to run their fingers through his hair. A hand remained over half of his face, as he looked up to the sky.

'We are fine'. Good, good. But what of the people who aren't? What of the people who did such a heinous thing? What of people in general?

How could 'fine' exist in a world where hate was so common?

Every year, something new. Another attack, another corrupt leader, another questionable law.

We've grown as a species. Yes, that can't be denied, but we still have far too much to fix.

Kaiser's hand ran it's fingers through his hair once again, before finally falling to his lap alongside the other. His chin remained up, however. Eyes were trained on the fluttering leaves of a tree mere metres away. His mind momentarily left him as he allowed himself a moment to watch the uncaring, peaceful display.

If such a thing can exist, how can it exist alongside us? Murderous, malicious beings. We were never meant to be here. The universe would neverintend for something as beautiful as nature to become tarnished by creatures that gained too much free will.

In the back of his mind, Von Kaiser remembered a certain field in France. It was now so dented and scarred that the once-flat ground had become permanently uneven.

But grass grew on that field, now. The mistakes from nearly a century ago had, in the end, provided life. The field's past was never forgotten, but the grass grew without care. The sheep grazed without a second thought. Life went on.

"Hm..." He hummed to himself, successfully breaking-out of his deep thought. While he'd been brooding, he'd leaned forward on the edge of the bench and had begun to examine that pulled dandelion once more. "C'est la vie..." He commented, bitterly. Kaiser wasn't sure who he was speaking to, either. Was it the dandelion, who would wither away and die? Or was it himself?

"C'est la vie." A corner of his moustache turned-up, and he gave a facetious chuckle before dropping the plant and placing both of his hands firmly on his knees, pushing himself off of the bench. Looking at the sky, he'd realized he'd been out here brooding for quite some time.

When had he gotten to the park? Around eighteen after twelve, and now it was nearly halfway to four. Dinner was always at five, and he still needed to buy groceries. He should be leaving now.

Just as he took a step, another vibration came from his pocket. Kaiser paused and grabbed-up the phone he'd replaced only a moment ago, squinting at the screen (the sun always made it so dark!) to find that a certain boxer had posted to a social media account. Upon further investigation, Von Kaiser found it was a bunch of well-wishes, thank-you's and 'be safe's. All of the other boxers were showing support in some shape or form. Even the horseshoe-toting child had changed his profile picture so it had the special 'filter' over it.

... Hm. Well, Kaiser supposed that was as good a show of support as anything. It wasn't like many people could do much else, at the moment.

The phone was pocketed again, and the boxer began the quiet walk back to the station. The train would be arriving soon.

There would be people on the train.

The bread at the bakery would still be fresh.

The tree's leaves would be rustling. The grass would grow in the fields, and the dandelion would regrow.

Von Kaiser sighed, and a small smile settled onto his face.

Life went on. C'est la vie.

[brucesimpkinsblog]

Our REAL Home

My precious mother just went home to be with the Lord.  It was a crushing blow to have her removed from the lives of all of her family and close friends, but we are consoled knowing that she is in Heaven . . . which is her real home and ours as well.  We imagine the love and joy and peace she is now experiencing in Heaven and we rejoice with the angels that she has been given a new imperishable body where there is no pain or suffering or tears, for all eternity!

 Genesis 1:27 God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.

 Male and female were created in His image.  We have all inherited His Godly attributes.  One of the primary attributes of God is that He likes to create things.  He imagines it and when He speaks it, it is created.  Men and women are also the only creatures on earth who can imagine something that doesn’t exist and then create it with the God given resources we have at hand.  Sculptures, paintings, architecture, photographs, music, poetry, movies, plays, novels, children’s stories, fictional characters that scare us, or intrigue us, or make us laugh.

 We are exercising Godly attributes when we use our imaginations to create something.  It is this very imagination that Jesus used throughout His life to help us understand what the Kingdom of Heaven is like.  It was easy for Jesus to know what Heaven was like, because Heaven was His home.  That’s where He started.  That’s where He came from to begin with.

 John 6:51  I am the living bread that came down from heaven.

John 8:23  "You are from below; I am from above. You are of this world ; I am not of this world

John 16:28  I came from the Father and entered the world ; now I am leaving the world and going back to the Father."

John 8:58  "I tell you the truth," Jesus answered, "before Abraham was born, I am !"

 John 1:1-2  In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was with God in the beginning.

John 1:14  The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

 The good news is that anyone who is a believer in Jesus as their Lord and Savior also has Heaven as their home.  Jesus promised it to us.  

 John 14:1-6

14:1 "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. 2 In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. 4 You know the way to the place where I am going."

 5 Thomas said to him, "Lord, we don't know where you are going, so how can we know the way?" 6 Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

 John 14:23  "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.

 My earthly father described a middle of the night exchange he had with my mother shortly before she died. She said to him, “Take me away”. He said, “What”?  And she said it again, “Take me away”.  He replied, “Where do you want me to take you”?  And she said, “I want to go home”.

 In the morning she told my father she didn’t know where she was, but she just had a strong desire to be home . . . and the next day she went home . . . to her real home.  Her perfect home.  Her eternal home.

 Jesus went ahead of us to prepare a home with Him in Heaven.  Titus 2:13 describes Jesus’ coming to take us home as “The Blessed Hope”.  It doesn’t matter if we are in the grave or still living when He comes.  What does matter is whether we are prepared to make Heaven our home or not.

 But here is a surprise. At least it was to me.  A large percentage of people . . . even within the church . . . are afraid that Heaven is going to be boring and that they are not really looking forward to Heaven so much.  They say, “Oh, it’s better than the alternative, but it just sounds kind of boring”.

 For some reason, there is this unbiblical view of Heaven that everyone is going to be sitting on a cloud strumming a harp for all eternity.  Gary Larson has a cartoon about this.  It shows a person sitting on a cloud with a harp and there is a thought bubble above him that says, “I wish I had brought a magazine”.

 I read a book about Heaven by Randy Alcorn who said he owned at least 150 books written about Heaven. The interesting thing is that the majority of all those books say that there is no way we can really know what Heaven is going to be like . . . but of course they follow it up with . . . “but it will be more wonderful than we can imagine”.  If I can’t imagine it, it’s not really all that comforting…

 No wonder believers are not looking forward to heaven.  There isn’t any Godly imagination involved.  How can you look forward to something you could never imagine?  If I can’t imagine it, I’m not sure I want it. How many times have you tried to describe an event or a place that was really fantastic, but when you tried to tell others about it, all you could say is, “well you just have to be there . . .”. Cathy and I took a vacation several years ago that to this day is the best vacation we ever had.  It was in the unlikely state of Vermont.  We try to tell people that Vermont is the best vacation spot on earth, but no matter how much we try to describe it, it’s not really enough to get people to want to go there.

 But even though it’s hard to describe Heaven, I find it interesting that so many authors say we can’t know anything about Heaven.  I believe we CAN get a glimpse.  I did a Bible exercise and counted how many times Heaven is mentioned in the New Testament. The word “Heaven” is used 236 times in the New Testament and the words “eternal life” are used 66 times.  162 of those references are in the four gospels . . . Matthew, Mark, Luke, John.

There are 41 references in the book of Revelation, and really the entire book of Revelation is a description of Heaven.  Almost every book in the New Testament has at least one reference to Heaven.

 So if there is so much talk about Heaven in the Bible, WHY CAN’T WE GET A GLIMPSE OF WHAT IT’S GOING TO BE LIKE?  The fact is, we DO get a glimpse.  

 The Apostle Paul tells us:

 1 Cor 13:12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror ; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

 It may be a poor reflection, but when we look intently at the reflection, we can get a glimpse of Heaven. And in order to really catch the best glimpse Heaven, we need to become very good at using two of the tools God has given us.  The first and most important is His written Word.  

 Constantly Jesus was saying, “The Kingdom of Heaven is like . . .”  Jesus was there from the beginning.  He described it to us the best He could according to our limited earthly experience, but all He could do is give some analogies and live a life that will hopefully demonstrate how people will someday live in unity and love with each other . . . as it is in Heaven.

 The other tool  we have available is often overlooked.  It is the God given attribute of imagination and creation.  There is so much of God’s grandeur all around us all the time.  Use your imagination. Can you imagine a world of even greater beauty than what is right now?  Maybe you can imagine a world where there are no weeds or bugs or traffic or mean people . . . what can you come up with as a better place than we have right now.  

 For the early Christians, non-stop feasting was the best they could imagine.  Never hungry, never thirsty.  When was the last time you were hungry and not sure where you could get a handful of rice?  When was the last time you weren’t sure if you could find clean water to drink?  According to their imaginations, you and I ARE in heaven. But it’s even better than that. We need to let Heaven be one of the driving factors that causes us to keep going.  Imagine Heavenly things that are waiting for you at the end of the race! Colossians tells us:

 Col 3:1-2 set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God.  Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

 Use your God given imagination of His greatness.  Let it draw you in.  In the great Hebrews “Hall of Faith” passage about all of the faithful people of God, it says this:

Heb 11:16 They were longing for a better country — a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

 They had to use their imaginations to long for a better country, and so can we.  But if your imagination is a little rusty, you can try getting it started by reading Revelation 21 and 22.

Rev 21:3-4  I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. 4 He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

 You see, we are under a curse on this earth.  We have a sin nature.  We are all naturally selfish.  It shows in our children.  You do not have to teach a child how to lie or cheat or steal. That is the natural process for a child if left alone.  We have to TEACH them goodness and righteousness which is actually unnatural.  But in Heaven the curse will be gone.  No one will be selfish any more.  We will get along with everyone perfectly.  Look at Revelation 22:3

 Rev 22:3-5  No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him. 4 They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. 5 There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.

 I want to close with a true story about Thomas Andrew Dorsey.  He is the famous black American who is now known as “The Father of Gospel Music”.  

 I’m not going to take up too much space for his whole powerful testimony, but I will just say that after his wife and baby both died during childbirth he was devastated because he was not with them when they died.  After some time of grieving Thomas was invited to visit a professor friend at the college.  While he was waiting to see his friend, he sat at a piano all alone and he described what happened:

 I sat down at the piano, and my hands began to browse over the keys. Something happened to me then.  I felt at peace.  I felt as though I could reach out and touch God.  I found myself playing a melody, and once it was into my head the notes just seemed to fall into place:

 'Precious Lord, take my hand, lead me on, let me stand!  I am tired, I am weak, I am worn, through the storm, through the night lead me on to the light, take my hand, precious Lord, lead me home.'

 It was the Lord that gave me these words and this melody.  I heard Him clearly that night.  He also healed my spirit.  I learned that when we are in our deepest grief, when we feel farthest from God, this is when He is closest, and when we are most open to hearing Him and receiving His restoring power.

 And so I go on living for God willingly and joyfully, until that day comes when He will take me and gently lead me home.

 Have you ever noticed the reoccurring theme of going “Home” in gospel music?  Most of the best ones were written when they were going through difficult times.  Those who suffer, know the comfort of the Father and desire to go to their real home in Heaven . . .

 I’ve got a home in glory land that outshines the sun . . .

Swing low, sweet chariot, coming for to carry me home . . .

One glad morning when this life is o’er, I’ll fly away.  To a home on God’s celestial shore . . .

Oh Lord, I know, I have no friend like you, this world is not my home I’m just passing thru . . .

 Precious Lord, take my hand, lead me on, let me stand!  I am tired, I am weak, I am worn, through the storm, through the night lead me on to the light, take my hand, precious Lord, lead me home.

 Heaven is not a distraction from living the life Jesus wants us to live . . . it is a driving force that keeps us from giving up.  Heaven is the reward.

 Eph 3:20-21 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever!  Amen.

[stephhannes]

america’s next top sparkling water pt. 1

When I was in high school I got a lot of shit for drinking sparkling water. My fridge was stocked with La Croix, and I was a laughingstock. Now, seven years later, bubbles have come into fashion. People love La Croix, so much so that the pronunciation of the brand has become a hot topic for discourse (the company pronounces it as ‘la croy,’ and after months of that being shoved in my face, I’ve renounced my old pronunciation of ‘la kwah’). Here’s the thing, everything in Texas is cheap. For the last three years, every other week when I’d hit up the HEB I’d pick up two 12 packs of La Croix and drive them back to my home. When I moved to NYC, I realized that it’s $8 for a 12 pack and that’s exactly half of the $16/wk grocery budget I’ve been living on. (Also I am but a weak child, how am I supposed to carry two twelve packs back to my apartment?) I’ve not touched a La Croix in the last month, and have been venturing into the world of 99 cent sparkling waters. Out of all the ones I’ve tried, this is my definitive ranking. Based on general flavor, retention of carbonation, and personal enjoyment- I present to you “Stephanie’s Sparkling Shitshow pt. 1”

As a control, I’ll be basing everything on the La Croix scale. The flavor is subtle, but fresh and authentic. It doesn’t have that weird aspartame-y artificial sweetener aftertaste, no syrupy flavor. Since LC comes in cans, the carbonation retention is at its peak- it bites when you take the first sip after cracking open a cold one with the boys, and that lingers on for as long as you keep it open. There have been times when I’ll drunkenly open one (because I ‘need to hydrate before I fall asleep’) and pass out before I finish it, and when I wake up in the mornings I can still finish it without being upset. The fact that it comes in a can allows for maximum personal enjoyment because it’s easy to share your 12 pack with friends, there’s no stress about opening a liter of it and having to hurry to finish it before it loses carbonation, the flavors pair incredibly well with vodka and can double as a mixer when you don’t have any juices (or if you just want a vodka soda with the fun of using a club soda, with the bite and absence of sugar of a tonic water).

The first sparkling water I tried when I came to NYC came from Rite Aid’s generic brand, Rite Aid Pantry. My first grocery store trip was the one when I discovered that I could no longer afford my preferred water, and my boyfriend quickly suggested the Rite Aid brand. He raved about how he “hates sparkling water, but the peach one is actually pretty decent.” I warned him that I have high standards when it comes to this kind of thing, but nevertheless, he persisted. I took a trip to the Rite Aid, picked up a bottle of their finest seltzer, and walked home. Immediately when I came in the door, I cracked open the bottle, took a swig and felt huge disappointment.

The flavor itself wasn’t terrible. I got “sweet peach,” and there was no misleading there- it tasted like a typical peach flavor. Artificial peach flavors don’t usually have that incredibly fake taste, and this was no exception. However, it had that sweetener taste despite boasting it was a seltzer with no calories, no sugar, etc. In terms of carbonation retention, it wasn’t very carbonated straight away, I tried drinking some the day after I opened it, and there was nothing left aside from the awful syrupy aftertaste. Personal enjoyment was an all-time low, I pawned the rest of the bottle off on my boyfriend.

Next is the Clear Choice brand, which I purchased from Key Food. Honestly, I don’t even want to linger about this disappointment. Reeling from the sadness I felt after the Rite Aid disaster, I was met with heartbreak yet again. I picked up a strawberry kiwi flavor and wished that it had ki-went straight into the trash can instead of in my mouth. It had that awful aspartame aftertaste and the flavor wasn’t refreshing, it was chemically and downright offensive. I threw it out before I could determine much about the carbonation retention. Personally, I would have enjoyed a papercut to the cornea more than this water.

From Key Food yet again, I tried the Vintage brand water. This one is a real gem to me. At 89 cents/L it can’t be beat in price, and in my ranking system, it holds a solid B+ in every category. It’s reliable, and nor disappointing. However, there’s nothing truly special about it. Some of the flavors aren’t as natural tasting, (black cherry in particular, however I don’t really mind a strongly artificial cherry flavor honestly), the raspberry is decent, and the lime is pretty good. The flavors are pretty subtle though. The bubbles last pretty much all day for me, however if I don’t finish the bottle before I go to bed, it’s not good in the morning. I personally enjoy these an average amount, I have no real complaints, but also nothing to rave about. This one will probably remain a staple in my fridge.

Next is something a little different. Perrier from Amazon Pantry. This is one that I wish I could afford to have on hand at all times. It doesn’t fit into my search for an affordable La Croix replacement, but it’s just too god damn good to not talk about. I picked it up because I needed one more item to qualify me for free shipping, and it was cheaper than the 6 dollar shipping fee, so really I’d lose money by not doing it. It was a green apple flavor that came in a 6 pack of 16 oz bottles. I love Perrier, the grapefruit flavor was a staple in my diet when I was in high school. I never really got Perrier much after that because it’s a little too expensive for my scrub lifestyle, but I made an exception this time. The green apple flavor was overpowering, which I didn’t mind because my all time favorite artificial flavor is green apple. It tasted exactly like a jolly rancher, without the sweetness and inevitable cavities. The carbonation retention was at an all time high, there were times when I would start a bottle before bed, and be able to wake up the next day and finish it with no continuity errors in bubbles. And personal enjoyment was also at an all time high. The 6 pack was convenient because I didn’t feel the stress of having to finish an entire liter in one day. Also, this was the first sparkling water that I was able to successfully make a vodka soda with. All the others had flavor too subtle to not get overpowered by alcohol, but the aggression of the apple in this one paired perfectly with some ice and vodka.

Finally, I’ve tried Polar, also from Key Food. It was on sale for 99 cents so I picked a couple up. I’d heard the praises of this water sung by a friend of mine, and after remembering how much my boyfriend hyped up the Rite Aid water, I kept my expectations low. This was good, because it truly exceeded my expectations in flavor- I got pomegranate and mango berry. I wasn’t expecting anything terrible from pomegranate but I was skeptical about mango berry (mostly because mango La Croix is my least favorite flavor and if they can’t get it right….who can?) The flavors were great, very natural, no sweetener, not too aggressive, and refreshing. It was all I could have ever asked for. Carbonation is where it lacks a little bit, there’s not enough bite when I open it up, and I do feel that pressure to finish the bottle before it goes flat, but that’s not much of a chore when it tastes as good as it does. Personal enjoyment was also high, especially because of the flavor selection. Every brand has a lime and a berry flavor, and I get tired of those quickly, but this deviation from the norm from the brand is truly my dream, not only are these flavors that are different from what you usually see, they were flavors I had never seen before in general, and they did not disappoint. Polar, I think, has won my search for best affordable sparkling water, thus far. 

All in all, it’s been a sparkling spectacular trying to find the perfect seltzer for my lifestyle. This isn’t the last review you’ll get from me in regards to water. After all, all I care about is sparkling water and wonderwall.