#bc 1) ???? and 2) the imposter play was good and got fucked over bc of that

[linogram]

forgot which game it was, but when jacob alpharad was imposter and killed and either blackmailed someone or the other imposter did and then said blackmailed person immediately starts blabbing and goes "oh!!! im sorry!! i didnt realize!!!!" just irked me bc the thing telling u ur blackmailed literally pops up as soon as the meetings called and before anyone talks, like ur telling me u somehow missed the giant sign saying "you have been blackmailed"

[vespiiqueen]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the ask box of the last 10 people who reblogged something from you (if you want !! 💛💖)

Wow I rambled a lot with this but i can't add cuts bc I'm on mobile rn DHSISHSJ sorry :"))))

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1. Ik Ik "haha how cringe are you" of me to say, but honestly? Homestuck. Homestuck helped me in a time of need and when i so desperately wanted something to latch onto. Finally, I caved into my friends telling me to read it-- and it's been a blast!! The epilogues / hs^2 make me feel kinda sad though, because so much of what I loved about the original was yeeted through the nine circles of hell and into the trash. I love Y/ffany's (I call her Yippi tho) design, the art is really pretty at times, Harry is a major dork, I LIVE for seeing Vrissy bc honestly?? Her design is 10/10, very early 2000s emo style and I also live for that. Tavros is cute and a nerd and I think that's swell!

But in terms of story and how any of this happens, it makes me sad to see it happen. If Vriska could return as Vrissy, why not OTHER beta trolls? Where's my Eridan fish man, writers?? Give me the boy or perish by my fury.

2. Also super "haha how cringe are you" but,,, murder cats (Warriors), esp the early 2005-2015 amvs and stuff. I remember watching Flightfootwarrior's "I Will Not Bow" Scourge amv for HOurs and having no clue what was happening, but all these edgy kitties were KITTIES! It's introduced me to a lot of music I still listen to to this very day (Imagine Dragons, Young/the entirety of Hollywood Undead, Breaking Benjamin). And yknow what?? This new arc is absolute chaos, but in the good way.

I'm an "OG Fan". I prefer the first arc, The Prophecies Begin, to almost any of the other arcs. I just could never get into the other arcs-- not to say I haven't read them, I HAVE and the Fire Scene was probably one of my favorite moments beside grumpy Jaypaw, god complex Lionblaze, and fear the gods Hollypaw. I thought the build-up for it was SUPER satisfying. Gray Wing is my baby and I fully embellish in the Gray Wing is Silverpelt theory.

This new arc is definitely something new for the universe. While I didn't read aVoS (but I may do that if i can find the files for it), and so I don't know the major events of it other than what I've seen M.A.P.'s (Multi-Animator Projects, for clarification,,, bc unfortunately that term is also something disgusting). There's fucking cat possession and all the Clans questioning their belief system, yo. Shit be on fire.

Also the Imposter is 100% Ashfur, that's canon now, yeah??? Also im sorry but fuck Root x Bristle that's the dumbest shit I have ever seen. Give me Root x Shadow or face the wrath of my dragon plushies.

RiverClan is my Clan and my gov assigned warrior name is Fireshell 🌟🌟

3. As much as I hate the author,,,,, Harry Potter. It's been a major part of my life for as long as I can remember. I can never really remember why, but I've always just loved it- the movies, the books, the extra little merch that would pop up in my local Walmart. Of course my favorite character is Draco Malfoy. I could go on and on and ON about how I think his character arc was SHIT and JKR didn't have the balls to make him a confident gay man that was always implied through the text (at least, my lesbian ass thought it was implied but i may just be projecting, idk). I could ramble about Draco for HOURS and what I think his character SHOULD have been and how his parents are horrible (more specifically, Lucius bc Narcissa [?] Actually showed a few good moments), and a child should never have to pay for their parents sins.

Oh noo, Draco's a villain because he's a victim of major abuse and peer pressure? He's a villain because a literal child can be horrible and they'll always always always stay as a horrible little fiend?? Fuck that. He's a child.

Unlike manchild grease pan Snape, who was a racist piece of shit and shouldn't have became a fucking school teacher but it's okay because he was ~~~in love~~~. No, fuck you, he was a creep. James Potter n Co may have been a little posh bitch to you, Snape, but that's no fucking excuse to continue to bluntly be a little cunt all the way into adulthood. You're an adult who flatly changed your PATRONUS to imitate Lily's. You have no excuse. And Harry went and named his child after you LIKE JESUS CHRIST, DID RON'S SISTER NOT HAVE A SAY IN THE NAMES TOO?????

I also fully adore the idea that Muggles can run into Hogwarts and their patronus can 100% be a made up, fantasy creature. Imagine you learn the patronus spell and suddenly fucking ARCEUS comes from your wand. Imagine learning the spell and CHTULU (i did not spell that right but im so tired) comes from your wand-- an entire ass fucking Lovecraftian, Eldrith horror is just the embodiment of you. What if it was a fucking Homestuck character like Vriska? How fucking METAL would that be?? Hskajssowjjsjs get on it fandom.

4. Hee hee very evident by my url but Pokemon is another major thing of mine. While vespiquen isn't my favorite (that title goes to Hydreigon), it is definitely up there!

I've ALWAYS enjoyed the idea of Pokemon. You run around, training up these fight monsters and collecting them. I remember playing my sister's Ruby version on her flip-up Gameboy. I couldn't even read but I ran around catching god only knows how many of the same pokemon wherever she was. Apparently, I had fought for hours in the same area and leveled her Blaziken up to lvl 50 something and left her lvl 30s in the dust LMAO.

I got my first game when it was Pearl/Diamond. It was Pearl, and it still holds a very fond place in my heart. I could barely read, I could barely write-- I had named my Turtwig something along the lines of "MmorpHy" and my player boy "ZbsibJ". Yes I remember the names slightly. I really didn't get far-- I barely got to the first gym but I was just so happy to play it.

I eventually lost the game, as a 5 year old would do, but I can still vividly remember what was happening when the game arrived. I had just came back from the dentist and was quite tired from fighting the dentist bc I was super scared. Mom suddenly handed me a box and said it was mine-- my overseas (at that time) dad had bought me Pearl and my sister Diamond, because I lost my shit about it when he visited one time.

Well, tdlr, I played it for about five minutes while struggling to stay awake against the loopy gas they made me take. I fell asleep listening to Twinleaf Town's soundtrack. Every time I play a rom of Pearl and I get to where the player's house fades in and I hear that first tune of the song, I get a huge smile on my face and cry-- as.. Weird as it sounds.

A few years later, I had gotten Pokemon Black bc I liked Reshiram on the cover. Now, this one I could actually READ when playing, but I don't remember a lot of things about it. I probably lost this one too, as a 8/9 year old would do. I DO remember, I chose Snivy and my sister chose Tepig (hrmm there's a theme here of grass/fire goin on......) and vibing to the music. I was so amazed by the sprites moving, I just kept getting into encounters to see the sprites move (oh boy, no one tell younger 7-9 y/o me about Zelda......oh wait....)

Playing Pokemon NOW, as a 17 year old """gifted""" chick, I stil have very fond memories. I recently beat Pokemon Black again and GOD the OTS SLAPS. I fucking adore the soundtrack-- the track that plays when you battle a trainer, the low health dings being turned into a legit song that also slaps, the battle! gym leader themes-- and oh my gOd, the legendary theme is amazing? It really tells you just how glorious these pokemon are supposed to be. It's not intimidating like Groudon/Kyroge/Rayquaza's themes. It's not action packed like Palkia/Dialga's is, it's not filled with tension like Giratina/Arceus's is-- but it radiates the GLORY that the beasts portray. And I live for that. (Also, Kyurem's version is my favorite because it glitches in the beginning and that's rly cool)

P/D/P and BW/BW2's stories, imo, are some of the greatest ones. Yeahhh, US/USUM's is cool and I haven't played XY nor SwSh-- but the ones I can find memorable are PDP and BW/BW2. I love N. I love Barry. They're my sons. Ghetsis is fucking terrifying, Cyrus needs a hug. Giratina scared the piss out of me when I was younger, which was NOT helped by Giratina and The Sky Warrior.

I think my favorite movies are the gen 4 ones. The Rise of Darkrai having a tear-jerking theme for such a mysterious pokemon (i still tear up when i hear Ocarion), Giratina being spiteful is a mood and Shaymin was cute, Arceus being angry is also a mood. Yeah, Pokemon 4Ever made me cry my eyes out over Celebi, Mewtwo Returns made me again cry because Mewtwo accepting who he is, I remember how vastly different the BW movies are-

I just. I have a lot of memories with the series, even if Gamefreak and Nintendo kinda do the series dirty a lot (your top-grossing thing and you made That monstrosity for the Switch? How dare you.). It's comforting to be stressed and pull up my roms for the games and to play them. Mystery Dungeon is incredibly fun to play, Pokemon Ranger is really fun with the concept (Shadows of Almia continues to kick my ass to this very day and FUCK the Jungle Relic, I hate the Water Challenge fucking gyarados bullshit). I remember the pokemon I got for MD (I got Time, my sis got Darkness) was Mudkip, if that is any help.

I love my little fictional pixel monsters.

5. Yup, someone told tiny 7-9 y/o me about console games. The legend of Zelda. My first Zelda game was Twilight Princess on the Wii and BOY did I play the fucking SHIT out of that game.

Honestly, looking back and looking at playthroughs now-- I still love TP. Twilight Princess is still one of my top favorite Zelda games-- yes, even after playing OoT, Majora's Mask, Wind Waker, Skyward Sword, the anniversary four swords edition for the DS where you could play by yourself (Nintendo pls bring that back, I don't have friends to play it with ;-;), Phantom Hourglass- ect.

Something about Twilight Princess grabbed me by the head and yeeted me into the world. I can remember playing it for hours with little to no breaks. I, a tiny 9 y/o, had gotten the hang of the controllers and managed to get past the tutorial quite easily. And then, I was launched into the game and I wasn't stopping for NOTHING. Mom and Dad would have to force me to save and get off to go and eat dinner. THAT sucked.

I had done everything on my own up until the first temple, the forest temple. Not where/when you saved the dumb kid, but when you were saving the spirit's light. Theeeeeeennn I got stuck on the fucking Forest Temple for deadass six months straight. I'd play for hours, running around in circles, unable to figure out where to go, and because I didn't grasp the temple's purpose of being that way- I'd get angry and get off. It wasn't until dad looked up a walkthrough and talked me through what I was supposed to do that I learned how to get through temples.

I had gotten to the last little fight with Ganondorf before the Wii broke and i could no longer play. Despite the Wii being broke and we got rid of it, I was ADAMANT on keeping the game, and I kept that game for YEARS. It was an original copy out of a sealed box, and I eventually lost it when I left it accidentally at my now ex-friend's house.

She had a Wii and I went "hey I have a Wii game!" And I brought my Zelda over. Worst fucking choice of my goddamn life. Mom called me to come home and said I couldn't sleep over like the original plan was, and that was it. My ex-friend stashed my Zelda and I never saw it again. And, even if I wanted to-- I couldn't get it back, which makes me upset. We had a BAD falling out. She likely doesn't even remember it's there, or sold it to the local game junkie kid who buys ALL games.

But I still love the game. Midna was amazing, and I loved how snarky she was and she has a very cute design! The game's OST is fucking phenomenal. Midna's Desperate Hour makes me cry bc goddamn it really sells how serious that situation is. I love Hyrule Field's theme in this game. I love the Twilight Realm's song. Zant was fucking hilariously scary. Ganondorf's design in this game scared the piss out of me when I was younger.

Midna and this game's Link and Zelda are def my favorites. Yeah yeah, Sheik is cool and all I Guess but dhsushwishs Midna holds the special place in my heart. She was totally my gay awakening BUT

For other game antagonists, I adore Ghirahim-- let's go you funky little queer-coded villain. Skull Kid was great, I love the entire dynamic of him. Prankster lost soul stumbles upon Majora's Mask and the mask makes him act out due to powers-- which, I actually took very heavy inspiration from for one of my OCs. The moon falling to Hyrule was a fucking terrifying looming threat.

But the game series holds a place, and I've yet to be able to play BoTW-- although, I'm fairly certain I'll like it. The playthroughs I've watched of it are all fairly decent! I just. Gotta save up enough money to buy it haha.

Dang guess I gotta go watch a Twilight Princess playthrough again.

Honorable Mentions:

Avatar: the Last Airbender, specifically Book 3

my OCs definitely make me happy, they're my children and I'd ramble A LOT longer if given the chance WHEEZE

My friends, but I didn't add them here bc it's more fictional stuff, I presume

Baking. I love to bake cupcakes.

Painting is fun. I'm an artist and goddammit im going to use painting as an excuse to make a mess.

Fire. I rly like fire, down to a pyromaniac level. However, i hate the fires that happened to my home town, the Great Smokey Fires of 2016-- THAT pissed me off. How dare you burn mountain landscapes to the ground. Perish.

History. I'm a history nerd.

I'm also a science nerd.

But fuck math, I cannot comprehend math to save my life.

For some reason, I rly like learning how the human body works??? like did you know, organs are actually sticky when touched by a bare hand?? Did you?? How fucking cool is that.

Bakugan. I love Bakugan, esp the DS game. I love my Darkus Leonidas. Give me back the online world, you peasants-- I want my Darkus Dragonoid. (Also fuck all my friends from when I was in kindergarten- my theory that Alice was Masquerade was somewhat correct.)

[glumnet-blog]

via Vace

correct me if im wrong but i dont think u ever had to experience the mandatory joys of hebrew school. maybe u did i forget i dont want to make you too jealous here but  i went to hebrew school on thursdays and sundays from 7-14 years old.  hebrew school lasted for just a couple of hours but it felt excruciatingly longer than that.  hebrew school was just like going to school, on top of goin to regular, grade school during the week. that is a ratio of 2 schools to every 1 week!  only a generous masochist would send their child to 2 different schools right?   i think it was worse than regular school though, bc i simply didn't have friends there.  the only vivid encounter i remember with a peer before 5th grade was with Lucas in the second grade, whom my mom delicately tried to pair us together in order to have our conversational sparks ignite, over a luigi video game, like she was trying to start a fire in the wilderness out of uninterested rock and twig.  lucas had a 7 year old mullet and had a lot of confidence.  i didn't like either of those things.  especially the mullet shit bc i was a rat tail or die kind of 7 year old.  after my mom literally accompanied me to hebrew school for awhile and the other kids thought i had special needs, she tried the opposite approach.  she hired the UC berkeley student hebrew school teacher to come tutor me once a week for an hour. this was pretty fucking weird.  my hebrew school was pretty lax and progressive.  in retrospect i realize the institution of the temple sinai hebrew school is much more about socializing with other jewish kids and pretending to memorize the va'haf'tah (or actually memorizing it if you're hannah sternberg and like to impress the rabbi) then to actually embed the jewish youth into intense and arduous jewish centered academia.  so having hairy 21 year old Noam awkwardly sit next to me at my kitchen table and timidly correct my mispronunciations of hebrew words was all a wash if you will.  but my mom was a stubborn mom who wanted her son to carry on the 'teachings of our ancestors' a forcefully sentimental phrase that makes you feel like a melodramatic bible scholar whenever u say it out loud.  thankfully these at home sessions didn't last long because of Noam's scheduling problems.  so for the rest of the fourth grade i was free of hebrew school.  but sooner or later fifth grade rolled around and my parents threatened me with no screen time for a month if i didn't go in. no screen time was a punishment way worse than death so i relented.    

i think it was at this first day of fifth grade hebrew school that shit changed.  2 things changed specifically. 1) i made nate laugh and 2) i made julia laugh.  when i wrote earlier i didn't have any friends in hebrew school i mean like i didn't even have acquaintances.  like i lethargically walked into class, pretended to be invisible for 2 hours, hid the bathroom during break times and waited impatiently after class on the sidewalk scouring the downtown oakland avenues for the plain yet angelic white of my moms 1995 honda oddesey.  i had made people laugh before at regular school i guess .  but there was something different about making hebrew school people laugh... i had somehow broken the social engima of this institution i had distain for, for so long.  not only that... it was a different kind of laugh ... at least coming from nate. i didnt just make nate laugh i made that motherfucker crack up.  watching him laugh was like watching a firecracker go off. like i got him in trouble from the teacher he was laughing so hard and uncontrollably.  making julia laugh was different.  she didnt crack up like nate.  but her laughter was genuine nonetheless and just as euphoric. it felt like whatever i imagine heroin to be everytime i saw her begin to open her mouth and smile and vibrate her whole head because of something i had said.  within the space of 2 hours i had acquired my first hebrew school friend and first hebrew school crush.  i was a fucking social millionaire....i would call this period of time, 5th grade, the golden age.   i could make nate laugh consistently and julia was a similarly consistent vessel to validate my 5th grade ego.  i was closer with nate bc we were both boys , and julia already had a very insular and exclusive trio which was not accepting new members.  herself, hannah, and arielle (who demanded to be called ari which i always was irritated by  she was a fake ari.  her real name was arielle! she was a fraud, imposter! my full name is ari.  i am the real ari.  stupid aside)....time pushed forward and 6th grade began.  several important dynamics changed in 6th grade.  the friends of nate who went to his real, 5 day a week school (st pauls) had been assigned to our 6th grade class.  additionally, puberty was pretty vivaciously in affect and thus social hierarchies were further matured as well as a recognition of elementary sexual thoughts and feelings.  i continued to make nate laugh but i felt like my secret companion was bein taken away by his St paul friends.  in order to combat this i tried to befriend all his friends.  something i learned then and throughout my life almost never works.... attempting to pass as an insider in a group where u are and always be an outsider.   i could make nates friend laugh a little bit but they were much more fond of making each other laugh.  also because they went to school with each other nathaniel (different than my friend nate) and jackson had an air of superiority and seniorirty over me.  even in the 6th grade i think i could detect this kind of unspoken social heirachy at play.  and with julia other guys were starting to make her laugh at hebrew school.  if you want to talk about social heirarchy she was definetly the queen of our class.   as puberty progressed the less cool i became.   bc my only claim to fame socially was humor , but i didnt understand all the other shit.  like dressing cool, talking cool, walking cool., etc.   that otther shit became important in middle school if not the rest of my life... because of this, and the fact im just a fucking shmuck at the end of the day , made julia talk to me less.  and with less talking came less laughing.  nate and julia's laugh was to special to me during this time just less frequent... and therefore more rare.  so when i did get it  from them it felt all that much better.

thhere was a point there end of 5th grade start of 6th grade i looked forward to hebrew school. i looked  forward to sitting down in the creaky, plastic black chairs in room 04 and whispering to nate about how ugly our teacher was.  i looked forward to playing tic tac toe with julia in the art room instead of drawing menorahs, and arguing with her about who had the ineferior tic tac toe skills (she did i got XXX like almost everytime ok) .  i even started to like  the fucking moldy, bookish smell of the temple because i associated it with having good times with julia and nate.

in the 7th grade my connections with nate and julia fell apart uninterestingly and sharply .  my friendships were fading with nate and julia before the year even started ....but of course with 7th grade we entered mid'rasha.  mid'rasha is just hebrew school for teenagers, explained my mom on teh car  ride over to my first mid rasha class.  that may be true for my mom but for me mid rasha was a new world.  a world i did not want to reside in.  midrasha was different in many ways, it was at night, it lumped in loud, sparkly 17 year olds with unsure, gangly 13 year olds in the same room, it was a different bigger campus, it was off.  clqiues were formed immiedatly and it was obvious i was not in the st pauls group.  the group nate was in.  i didnt even see julia at all i think she was   being ultra extroverted befriending the royalty that was 17 year olds who wore sean john and listened to MGMT before it was cool ( this was 2007) .  i went to naybe 5 or 6 mid rashas but i understood the jig was up.  i was no longer a funny person in the room nevermind the funniest in the room.  the teachers were young  attractive college students who you couldnt fun of at all for being ugly.  i wasnt even in the same elective as nate anymore so i couldnt whisper ' ruby is ugly' even if i wanted to.   1 time i did have an art class with Julia.  but now as an ambitious and earnest 13 year old she tackled the assignment sincerely.  i saw her drawing these detailed portraits i thought were gross because they reeked of being  a try-hard.  i just wanted to play tic tac toe.

i stopped going to mid rasha and i didnt see nate or julia again for a while. i didnt see nate until i was a junior in HS and i took the SATs at the high school nate attended.  when we were all getting checked in i saw him at a circular lunch table with his st paul friends.  i walked by him to say hello.  we gave each other a stoic and cold ' whats up dude '  .

the next time i saw julia was at my high school school sponsored dance.  at the time i was nervous as shit bc i did not know how much i would have to dance with my then girlfirend, what kind of dance i would have to do, if i should get mad at other guys dancing with her etc.  a bunch of high school dance inspired neuroses were blossoming in my head.   i was suprised as a motherfucker when i walked into the high school lobby and saw julia sitting a dinky plastic table checking students in.   i remember my brain being blank with confusion.  i walked up to her to get checked in.  she said hi ari with a smile.  the kind of trained smile a social butterfly has deployed many a time.  it was an impersonal smile.  it was warm and cold at the same time.  i said hello took my ticket and left without any small talk or acknowledgement of our hebrew school connection.   i went on to dance with my girlfriend a little but to mostly stand around and pep talk boris into making a move on yael.

i have not  seen either of them since.  i had a dream last night i was in hebrew school in the 6th grade.  julia was sitting across the class room.  she was mad i was looking at her and mouthed for me to stop.  nate was sitting next to me like he normally did in the 5th and 6th grade.  but he wasnt trying to exchange goofy remarks with me about all the flaws of the teacher.  instead he was listening attentively.  i leaned into to whisper somthing but he waved his hand faintly.  he was not to be disturbed

in sophmore year of high school my 'mentor' relayed to me that she was getting reports from teachers that i was exhibiting disturbing and unproductive behavior. disturbing and unproduvtive behavior? i thought.   i was just tryna get motherfuckers to laugh.  i was trying to chase the high of the first time i made nate cry.  i was trying to recreate the time julia was so approving of whatever joke i had made she rubbed my leg as an appreciating gesture and said youre soooo funny.  i never was able to recreate those highs in high school.  that kind of blind temporary euphoria stayed untapped, stored in my memories of hebrew school. my mentor said it was problematic that i was so loud and disruptive in class.  she understood i liked to horse around but she argued ' thats not the real you ari.  we both know you are better than that.  the real you is working hard , studying hard, respectful of teachers and avoiding distrations in class.  this class clown act you put on isnt the real you'  

that kind of pep talk , even at the time , felt weird to me.  who are you , some distant authoratative figure i meet with twice a month , to tell me who i am and who i am not.  and much more importantly beyond that, you tell me my true identity is attached to some golden scholar who wouldnt dare partake in the low life humor of classroom banter.  everything about academia makes me ripe with disgust and disinterest.  the only reason why school has been bareable at all is the social aspect.  making people laugh

during junior year of high school i went through my first break up , i cut friends off , friends cut me off, i went to my first funeral, i had an anxiety attack in jerasulem (symbolic of my relationship with judaism....in my opinoin) i felt increasingly alienated from my wealthy and narrow minded private school brethren, started smoking weed every night before bed and so on .  my mood was bad all the time, i was tired, and the last last last thign i wanted to do was to go to school.  this i now realize is my first bouts of Depression (dun dun duuunnnn).  

it is senior year of highh school now.  the students check in for the first time with their mentors.  my mentor relays to me personal behavioral report -  teachers now view me as quiet and respectful.    teachers are somewhat cognizant of my general apathy towards what is in front of me, but complimentary of my willingness  to put my head down and do the school work given to me.  my mentor is smiling and exclaiming ' see ari you did it!  this is the real you.  this is the hard working and respectful guy i know you have always been.  you dont have time for distractions you have higher priorities now' .  i just wanted the meeting to be over so i nodded my head rapidly in agreement.  however in my mind i thought the current version of myself teachers are describing could not  be further from the real  me.  the real me is still at temple sinai room 04 sitting in those cheap, creaky black chairs.  the real me is shaking nate's arm bc i just thought of a joke about the how ugly the spoken version of hebrew sounds to a non native speaker.   the real me is singing stronger by kanye in an obnxious robotic way , parodying the chorus in order to get julia to chuckle.  the real me has not been seen for or heard from for a while.  the new me is content with surviving the day without any interaction with peers.  the new me doesnt want to be seen.  the real me is still poking julia's shoulder, waiting for her to turn her head