#bc it FEELS like it has. i went to barnes and noble yesterday and there were no less than 4 haunted house books on the new releases display

[haunthouse]

would love to do research into just how much of an uptick theres been in haunted house horror content since the pandemic started, like, numerically

[thecampfirestory]

hi so since last thursday , i have been volunteering at my high school’s freshman and sophomore orientations with my besties and i wanted to share some experiences that remind me of the campfire kids

(sorry in advance for long)

•there was this tiny litol freshman girl who came dressed in all pink like lolita style with HUGE heels and she was my hero

•alternatively there was another freshman with cool ass custom grunge clothes like safety pins everywhere (they cut the bottom half of their left pant leg off , ripped the top of it up and reattached it with safety pins all around and it looked fucking sick) , rips , sharpie words all over , patches , FINGERLESS GLOVES !!!

•one friend and i would greet each other every time we saw each other by going “hola mi amorrrrr”/“hey sexy”/“aiiii it’s the love of my life”/etc

•that same friend and i are very touchy (we would bonk heads or hold hands or kiss each other’s foreheads through our mask) and i think some people thought we are dating but we are not we are jus platonically whipped for each other (i lowkey have a crush on her but shhh)

•one friend would drive me to the school every morning and one morning she pulled into the little plaza thing right next to the school bc she wanted to go to the liquor store to buy gum . she exited the car and screams “WHERE IS THE LIQUOR STORE ??? WHY IS THERE A THAI RESTAURANT ??? I WAS HERE LIKE LAST WEEK” (the liquor store was replaced with a thai restaurant like 4 months ago and now we are convinced that she probably came to the thai restaurant and walked around inside it hallucinating that it was still a liquor store)

•my best friend bought us cold drinks and we screamed the words to “Somebody That I Used To Know” by Gyote together with the windows down on the way to my house bc we wanted to feel like those teenagers in movies

•on one of the days my best friend and i were like “y’know what ? we have access to a car and money , let’s go to barnes and noble” and we went and vibed and it was pog . the cashier was trying not to laugh bc my friend got litol bookmark clip thingies that are dinosaurs with glasses but i got a book about serial killers

•at lunch yesterday one of my friends was eating pickles out of one of those little plastic sauce cups ?? like just raw plain pickles ???? even though she had a whole sandwich right there that she could eat ??????????

•this friend had the audacity to judge me for liking broccoli on pizza >:(

•for a few of the days , i worked at the room that the kids would get their ID photos taken and my job was to get them separated alphabetically bc they had to get this little card thing first otherwise they couldn’t get their ID and the cards were in alphabetical order separated into 3 groups based on last name (A-D, E-L, M-Z) so i would have to shout so all the kids could hear me go “LINE UP BY LAST NAME , GET YOUR CARD THEN GO TO ROOM 64” and some kids just wouldn’t pay attention and they wouldn’t get that first card thingy which started holding up the line for photos and then everyone would complain to me as if it was my fault so i got frustrated and started screaming louder and more like ,,, angy like “LINE UP BY LAST NAME AND GET YOUR CARD , IF YOU DONT GET YOUR CARD YOU BETTER START PRAYING TO WHATEVER GOD YOU BELIEVE IN THAT I DONT FIND OUT . AFTER YOU GET YOUR CARD GO TO ROOM 64” and one of my friends started laughing and was like “YES GIRL SCREAM AT THE KIDS !! LIVE OUT MY DREAM”

•yesterday was the last day so all the volunteers did a closing activity as a group where we taped a piece of paper to our backs and anybody could write whatever compliment/comment they wanted on it anonymously and it was very sweet and some people cried it was just wholesome and nice

•one of my friends came up to me during this activity , grinned at me like >:] and immediately turned around bc he wanted me to write something like bro that was not the point of the activity but i will in fact write something

•we also played a game on the first day called “birdie and perch” where one person is the birdie and one person is the perch and basically everyone moves around the room and the birdie has to find their perch and sit on their knee and i (5’2/5’3) was the perch for this guy (5’9 , US size 16 shoes) and it was fucking chaos , he would sprint to me across the gym like his life depended on it and all you would hear is BOOM BOOM BOOM and then he would find me and come to a complete stop right in front of me and then gently sit

THAT LAST ONE IS SO FUCKIN FUNNY TO IMAGINE DHDNHDNHFDBDNHDDJ HE JUST SITS SO GENTLY DHJDDJHDJDJD

oh god these are all wonderful i love that sm GDJHDJDDK

[moonythejedi394]

In either the harlot and the landlord or the danger in your eyes cherie stories, how would Bucky react to someone stalking Steve? Someone claiming to be trying to save Steve from Bucky?

omg wow i literally just got this ask from someone else but without a specified ‘verse so i did these days. i guess now i’m doing the kept boy ‘verse and prohibition ‘verse! someone trying to “save” steve from bucky is a very interesting scenario, bc, i’ll be honest, at least for kept boy, at the first inkling that someone was stalking his baby, mafia-king!bucky would just kill whoever it was. actually, i wrote a chapter of that fic yesterday wherein someone briefly insulted steve in front of bucky, albeit a very grave insult, and now the idiot’s dead. so, yeah.

but trying to “save” steve? oooh. let’s explore that in great detail. in the harlot and the landlord series, steve and bucky are really, really in-tune with each other. if someone tried to suggest that steve needed saving from bucky, they’d be dismissed instantly. steve is not playing these games, he needs no rescuing from that dick. 

but, danger in your eyes, that one is a v different situation.

without giving away too many spoilers, bc i have stuff planned for the plot of that series, both steve and bucky were in the army for WW1. steve was rejected from the military as per in canon, but was not approached by dr. erskine for the serum, instead, he learned drag and became a nurse. bucky was a sniper, and a damn good one. after the war, bucky had no idea what to do with himself, so one day, he just decided to become a hitman. he walked up to the closest mafia, offered his skills, demonstrated said skills, and quickly became their top gunman. in less than a year, he went from nobody to notoriety. 

his deal with steve is a business one, but he really does want to end up with a partner. perhaps a few months down the road of steve living with bucky, someone in a rival gang gets it in their head that steve is a damsel in distress of sorts and is being forced to serve bucky bc of debt or something. bc, on the outside, it doesn’t look very good, lbr. steve cooks and cleans and keeps bucky’s hens (oh he has chickens it’s 1919 i figured that if he’s rich enough to have a yard in manhattan, he’d be sensible enough to have some chickens), and he’s definitely doing more to keep bucky’s bed warm than sticking a pan of coals under the mattress. sure, perhaps it’s not so unusual for a young bachelor to have a housekeeper, but one that young and pretty? nope, they’re fucking. and when you’re on the inside and you know that bucky’s made his fortune through murder-for-profit, it’s not that difficult to worry that the housekeeper he’s almost definitely fucking might not be their out of his own will.

oh, and most people are still under the impression that steve is a women at that point. bc it’s 1919. fools be homophobic.

let’s consider the humble goon in, say, the irish mob’s employ. hey, maybe it’s steve’s old buddy arnie roth. hey, arnie remembers steve from school, and he knows that even if he’s wearing dresses and aprons everyday, steve is not a woman and when they were young boys, steve would not have been caught dead near his mother’s heels. he’s concerned for his old pal.

so arnie starts sneaking around bucky’s house. peeking through the windows and trying to figure out what’s going on. one night, he sees steve in the kitchen cooking something for dinner, when in walks james barnes, great big dog at his side (bucky has a dog, he’s a rottweiler/german shepherd mix and he’s a sweetheart despite his big teeth), and barnes goes straight for steve and grabs him on the ass. arnie makes up his mind that steve is in danger and books it to ready his plan of attack, missing the way steve tips his head back and sighs happily as he begs bucky for more.

arnie decides he’s going to rescue steve. he’s going to get him out of there, take him out west, and hope barnes doesn’t try to chase them. he buys two tickets to uhhh chicago? chicago. and he sets up to break into bucky’s house and rescue steve. he waits until steve leaves the next day to go shopping, grabs him, and drags him off. steve throws up a fight, duh, which is all elbows and biting and hair-pulling, until arnie gets him to open his damn eyes long enough to see who it is. steve gasps, then he grins and gives arnie a hug and he’s like “it’s been forever, how’ve you been!” and arnie just says “i’ll be better when we’re further away from here, come on!” 

and he drags steve off towards the train station. steve just kinda goes, bc he doesn’t exactly get what just happened but he wants to catch up with his old friend. he keeps asking questions and arnie keeps shushing him until tsuddenly they’re on the train and steve realizes something is wrong and demands what arnie thinks he’s doing.

“rescuing you!” arnie says. “rescuing me?” steve repeats, dumbfounded. “yeah, i got us tickets to chicago, as long as we get away now, barnes’ll never know!” “why the hell am I going to chicago?” steve demands.

in the meantime, duh, bucky doesn’t just let steve wander new york alone, he had a tail. only the guy was new and not that good and missed what happened. he runs back to report that he’s lost steve, bucky freaks out and puts up a city-wide manhunt. no sign of him. bucky thoroughly panics, bc by then it’s been a few hours and if steve was kidnapped, there should be a ransom note already. what if steve left him? what if steve decided he didn’t want to be bucky’s pet anymore and he’s vanished instead of breaking it off in person? bc obviously! instead of telling steve that he was developing Real Feelings that were not itemized in the business contract that is steve cooking nice dinners so bucky will fuck him, bucky has gone and done the love-falling thing! without anyone’s permission! it just sort of happened! one night, steve was snuggling into bucky’s side after sex and bucky’s heart just did this kind of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! moment that he, initially, thought might have been a heart attack. but no. ‘Twas Love. and now steve has gone and disappeared.

steve, on the train is like, how did i allow myself to be dragged onto a fucking train! “arnie!” he says, “bless your stupid fucking noble heart, why the fuck did you think i needed rescuing! i don’t need rescuing! do you know! how satisfying barnes’s dick is??? no you don’t! i enjoy being on it 24/7! take me back!” and arnie is like “whuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut?” steve explains, in graphic detail, how much he actually enjoys being bucky’s maid, and lets slip that, oh, in fact, not included in the itemized contract that did describe how precisely bucky liked to bathe his sexual partners, he has also developed Emotions. in fact, just the other night, steve was snuggling up to bucky post-sex and bucky snuggled him close and kissed the top of his head and steve’s heart did an unexpected !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! moment that he initially -- oh wait. huh.

bc we all love it when they’re fools, steve and bucky have fallen in love with each other at the same rate, not like falling asleep where it’s slowly and all at once, more like, you cuddle the same person day after day for a few months at a time and for some reason you get this light happy feeling inside every additional cuddle. also, more like an orgasm, slowly and then all at once. 

(no one tag john green in this, somewhere in his brother’s house is a book with my name on it that i don’t want to be brought out of the dusty cupboard it’s probably in)

the train does stop before it reaches chicago and steve gets off at the first stop. arnie goes with him, profusely apologizing, bc he was only trying to help, and they get back on another train back to new york. fortunately steve has the money. back in new york, steve tells arnie that he should probably just lay low but they’ll have tea next week, it was nice to see him, and he goes home. he finds bucky there with all of his people and even the big kahuna of the russian mafia N (you know who it is) gathered around the kitchen table trying to piece together where the hell steve could be. steve lets himself in, walks into the kitchen without being noticed, raises his eyebrows increasingly as bucky starts laying out the plan for doing a full grid search of all of new york, and then asks if bucky wants him to make tea for the guests.

bucky wastes no time in grabbing steve in a very tight hug. steve finds it’s quite nice. bucky then lets him go stammering about where the fuck had he gone and steve tells him to calm down before giving the story. “it was a complete misunderstanding,” he concludes, “there’s nowhere i’d rather be than here.”

bucky resumes hugging him. the sort of hug where you feel distinctly squished but it’s actually really nice. bucky’s crew see themselves out, saying they’re glad that steve has been found safe, and steve and bucky eventually sort themselves out enough to have supper and their usual evening routine of sexy times probably.

oh, the ILYs? those happen later. i have a Plan for that.