#because I don't remember how to have fun with them. although they tried to rebuild the friendship so many times

[the-land-of-snr]

One of my many character flaws is that if we don't talk for too long, I simply forget how to talk to you. But you usually remember how to talk to me. So it's all awkward and depressing. Stressful for me, confusing and hurtful for you.

[acciocriativity]

Tetrachromat ||Harry Potter

Pairing: Cedrico Diggory x Reader // Hermione Granger x Reader

Summary: In a world where you can see 100 million different shades, every day means a new discovery. But among so many, you find something completely different in someone

Word Count: 2,6k

N / A:  tetrachromatism or tetracromacia comes from the mixture of two words of Greekorigin,"tetra" means "four" and "Chroma" which means "color". A tetrachromat person has 4 cell cones, instead of 3 which is more common, and this makes him sensitive to a wider color spectrum. 

Part II

 I had just come home after a tiring day at work, when I came across a scene that I hadn't seen in a long time. There was a brown owl on the steps of my house, I looked around and then walked over to it, took the letter that was tied to one of its legs, and a few seconds later I saw it flying across the London sky back to Hermione, after all there is no one but her that I know in the Wizarding World. As she was waiting for me there for a long time, I'm sure my parents haven't arrived yet, as they would have let her in. 

I left my bag on the sofa and sat down to read it immediately, I hadn't heard from her in over a year and sometimes I feared the worst had happened. The last thing I received was a warning, she had told me that she couldn't get in touch because she had an important mission to do and that when it was over, we could talk again. 

“Dear friend, 

It has been a week since the war ended, the Wizarding World is turned upside down but we are at peace and rebuilding ourselves now. I'm sending this letter to let you know that I'm going to visit my parents' house in a few days and I would like to see you too. After lunch next Saturday it seems like a good time. 

I have more things to tell you than I can put into words, I would also like to ask you a favor, but we can resolve this later. 

 With love, Hermione. ”

This visit was only the first of many. We talked as far as she could tell me, some issues were still sensitive and very recent and I obviously respected that, but even without many details, knowing the things that happened was difficult to process and she also respected that. 

We started seeing each other more than once a week, my parents managed to help locate Hermione's parents very easily, since our families have been neighbors and close friends for a long time. That was the favor she asked for and I immediately agreed. 

Over the course of two months, things were returning to their proper place and I had been officially invited by the brunette to visit their version of London and of course, I accepted. I was looking forward to that day, in the last letter I received, she told me that she would like to introduce Harry and Ronald, her boyfriend, to me. It is strange to think that I had heard everything about them, literally everything that happened at Hogwarts I knew from letters, but that we never actually talked. 

On the day that the visit was finally going to happen, I was more nervous than I had imagined. At 9 am, I was just getting ready when I heard a huge noise in the living room and for a few seconds I was scared, until I remembered that the girl warned me that this would happen. 

I could hear my parents' voices downstairs and I didn't even have to worry about hurrying, the only thing that caught my attention were the steps on the wooden stairs and then a light knock on the door. 

- Come in, Mione - I replied calmly, knowing who I was as I finished putting on my boots. 

- It's really impressive how you always guess right - she replied with a smile and came in, sitting next to me. 

- It's not very difficult, nobody in this house really knocks on the door before entering, although I keep complaining about it - we both smiled at my comment and I continued - I thought you were going to bring Harry and Ronald - I commented getting up and she immediately laughed , leaving me confused. 

- It is weird to hear you saying "Ronald" so formally, it seems that you do not know him- she explained to me and I had to laugh too.

- I think so too, but as I don't know him personally, it doesn't feel right to be informal, I can't explain it, but anyway, I'm ready to go. 

 We said goodbye to my parents before apparating to a street with several different stores. We walked a lot and it was nice to see how people were happier after all the terror that happened. 

Many people stopped to talk to Mione, she tried to disguise it but I noticed perfectly how well it did her, as if the whole sacrifice was worth it because no one would have to suffer or be afraid anymore. 

It was only at lunchtime that we met with the others at a restaurant, that I had to insist a lot to go and exchange my money because Hermione wanted to pay, since I was the guest of the day. 

Along the way, I noticed how this London is more normal than I imagined it to be, I have to look closely to see the less drastic differences.

- Is it true that you see different colors from everyone ?? - the redhead asked unable to hold himself and I just laughed at Hermione's indignant expression - Ouch! What? It’s not true? - He put his hand behind his head, where he had been slapped by the brunette next to him.  

 We had come in less than 5 minutes ago, I thought it was going to be a lot more uncomfortable than it really was. Right after the introductions, Ronald asked me that question and I admit that I was a little surprised. I had no idea that Mione talked about me for them. 

 

- It is true, colors work in a different way for me. Around everything there are colors popping out before my eyes - I tried to explain as easily as I could with a smile. 

- Around people too ?? Around us now, have colors ?? - his eyes sparkled with excitement when I agreed - what do you see around me ?? - he added with interest in his voice. 

- Many shades of red, blue and orange - I said after analyzing him for a few seconds.

- Hey, it reminds me of that book you gave me. The psychology of colors - her smile opened immediately when she remembered.

- Psychology? It couldn't have a better word for a title? Nobody in their right mind would read that - Ron leaned back in his chair and Harry's posture changed, as if he expected what was coming. 

- That book has the meaning of each color, I like to think that colors describe people but since you are not interested, I will not say it - the two went from water to wine in a matter of seconds.

- We are interested, how could I not have been told about this before ?? - The brown-eyed boy looked at her as if he had been terribly betrayed. 

- We had bigger concerns Ronald, since the first year you two took me into trouble that could have cost our life or our expulsion - she stared at him seriously and not a trace of remorse stamped his face.

- But you don't regret living all these adventures, right? It was fun at least, most of them - he replied leaning over to her with a wide smile. 

- Well, some choices could be decided much more sensibly, we weren't that much of a child - she said moving away to the side as the other approached - what are you doing, Ronald? - her cheeks burned a light pink. 

- What is the definition of red? - Harry said suddenly, taking my attention from the couple next to me, he looked as comfortable as I did. 

- Well, usually strong emotions. Passion, love, anger .. I see it in all of you, but it is not up to me to point out exactly what it means in each case - I said looking at the three since I received attention from the lovebirds. 

- And do you have proof of that? Is it really true ?? - He asked me again, even more curious. 

- In terms of colors and meanings, yes, but as there are few people with my condition, no researcher has identified the relationship of colors with what is around them. I like to believe it's true, so far it's not wrong and I have tested it several times. 

 We continued talking animatedly, even after our orders arrived. The topic of colors continued until everyone was satisfied with their definitions and then they decided to tell me some mini adventures that they lived together, which I still didn't know about. 

- And after all this episode with the spider, he had the courage to say that they didn't do it wrong, as if my head had almost been eaten by mistake - Ron said with wide eyes while gesturing non-stop. 

 We all laughed but I lost focus on the conversation as soon as two men stopped by our table, clearly father and son or something, due to the clear age difference. Both had friendly smiles on their faces, but the youngest one caught my attention the most. 

I just managed to hear an echo in my head of what the conversation was about, I obviously wasn't looking at him because it would be rude and it's not the kind of thing I would have the courage to do shamelessly. 

- We haven't seen each other in a while, Mr. Diggory, oh by the way, this is a friend of mine - Mione nodded at me and I smiled, just before I introduced myself and they did the same.

 Cedric, it’s his name. I remained distracted by my own thoughts until a tap on the shoulder woke me up, they were no longer there but I could tell they were at a nearby table. 

- Hey, I was talking to you - she said with an expression of indignation and a little bit of concern too - oh, finally back to this planet - she completed it as soon as she got my attention again. 

- What were you going to say, Mione? - I felt my face heat up but I tried to hide it as much as possible, the less attention for this moment of mine the better.

 The brunette decided to leave the questions for later and I thanked her internally for that. After we finished eating, it was just the two of us again since apparently both of the boys had plans for the rest of the day. 

- Did something bother you earlier? You didn't even look at us - I heard her say as we walked out of the restaurant.

- Yes, but you don't have to worry about that, I just needed a few seconds to put my head in place - I hadn't even realized what that could mean until I saw the smile on her face. 

- Was just one "hello" enough for your head to get out of place? Not that I'm judging, that's usually how it was at Hogwarts - her tone was a little bit malicious and I instantly slapped your arm. 

- It was nothing like that, I had never seen anyone or anything with so many colors before. He had a rainbow of colors, I couldn't even process it properly - I used the lowest tone I could, after all we were still in public. 

- Are you sure?? Your vision may have confused him with the whole background -  the rational side spoke first and I shook my head - well, it doesn't seem like a coincidence. Cedric has always been the definition of Hufflepuff, I couldn't think of anyone else who could be a rainbow, literally speaking - her smile returned even more prominent. 

 As a last stop, we went back to Diagon Alley because apparently the desserts there were the best. I was about to find out if this is true or not, when Hermione told me she was going to get a book, which really isn't a surprise to anyone, so I enjoyed my chocolate cake alone, sitting at one of the round pink tables. 

- Hey, I didn't expect to see you here - it definitely wasn't a female voice, so as I looked ahead there he was again. 

- I would go anywhere to have such a good cake - we both smiled and I motioned him to sit on the currently empty chair - and what is your reason? I asked with one eyebrow raised. 

- I'm working as a house elf today, my dad ordered a huge order here and I came to get it - maybe I had paid more attention than necessary to his smile, but who can judge me?

- I don't want to disturb you, it must be important - I tried to be the most sincere in those words, but most of me wanted his presence for a few more minutes. 

- He won't mind waiting longer, I couldn't miss the opportunity to spend a few more minutes with such a beautiful girl - he dared to wink at me. 

 Before I could answer, the cashier who also owns the place came to our table personally and what she said made me blush hard. 

- Hello, your father's order is ready, Mr. Diggory and we also have a special promotion for couples, if you are interested - her smile was loving. 

 Cedric was as speechless as I was, both overflowing with redness in our face and the lady did not seem to understand the situation at all, she brought another menu with options for couples to our table before leaving us alone again. 

- This is not what I expected to happen, but this colorful cake looks really good - I blinked slowly and couldn't resist it, I had to laugh and the confused expression on his face made me laugh even more. 

- That was a very HufflePuff way of dealing with the situation and, by the way, you should try it. It suits you after all - I commented before eating my own cake. 

- Do you study at Hogwarts too? I mean, studied when it wasn’t destroyed. 

- Oh no, I'm not a witch. I know a lot about it ‘cause of Hermione, apparently you're quite popular - again I noticed the pink on his cheeks increase and I must say, it's amusing  to watch. 

- Not quite popular for sure, what else you know about me? - He regained his confident posture and raised an eyebrow in my direction. 

- Not beyond what I have already implied, but I would love to know more if it’s okay for you.

 Where did I get that confidence from? I'm not sure, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity and my attitude seems to have taken him by surprise as much as me. The words disappeared from his mouth as I grinned. 

- Is there a problem Cedric? - I was having more fun than I expected this afternoon. 

- I should have asked you out, but you were faster - he said so seriously frustrated but my only desire is  just to laugh.

- Oh, do you want to go out with me? I meant to get to know each other as friends - he stopped to analyze me and I tried to be serious but before he apologized, I held his hand - I was just kidding, I would love to go out with you - I winked at him before letting go. 

- You are really ... my heart is not going to have a minute of peace from now on, is it? 

- I will try to take it easy on you Diggory, but I don't know if I will be able to do it for long.  

 An hour later I left to look for Hermione with a promise from Cedric, we would meet again next week.

Harry Potter Masterlist

[jepleurs-icry]

My Life, My Mess, My Legacy Part 3

This chapter is perhaps the hardest to write because of how much I invested in this relationship.

Having had two previous relationships that went sour, I was much more aware of how this person behaved. Not just what he said, but how they acted.  In a way, I was leery of getting into another relationship. In fact, I went back to the singles dances once a month and joined a mixed soft ball league .  A fun league to enjoy a sport and make new friends. A social person I am not.  I am introverted, have way too much "empathy" and I am not a person who is well liked for some reason.  Why? I don't know; it was like that in school. People didn't know me, but they had a judgement of me.  Being unpopular was a way of life.  I really did not care. I had a lot of pride in me.  This was because "our" natural family had been split apart, and we were made fun of at school.  My pride came from my thinking that my family did nothing wrong except be poor.  It wasn't my fault.  It was something that we had no control over. So, to continue on, this pride made me tough, indifferent to what others thought of me.  I did not care.  If they could not take the time to talk to me, or want to be friends, even though I tried, I let it go and observed others but always from afar. The bullshit that people say to each other, boasting and bragging and back stabbing made me stronger.  I didn't want to be like them.  I grew up always observing others.  And I heard a lot of things that people would say, and totally behave another way. So, I enjoyed playing softball, that summer, it was fun! I was not an "A" player, more like a "C" player. But it was fun! But, it was at a singles dance one night, my girlfriend and I were doing a line dance, and I could see this man standing near the bar, but kinda off to the side a little.  He kept staring at me nearly all night. Time went on for awhile, and a few months passed some more, and the next dance I went too, I did not see that man at all.  I kinda forgot about him. I saw him playing on another softball team that summer or spring.  1995 I believe.  My girlfriend would come and watch the games sometimes and she knew I was a tad lonely, so she called out to this man and said something to him.  I think she told him he had a nice ass.  He laughed. I ignored him, as most of the guys there were looking to meet someone or they already had their significant other. At the next singles dance, he was there, and my girlfriend told him he could come sit with us.  But I said no, the seat next to mine was taken.  Although it wasn't; I wasn't prepared to have a jackass sit next to me all night. But, it turned out he seemed to be a nice guy, loved to talk and laugh.  He did talk a lot.  He told me he was a recovering alcoholic and was sober for about 6 months.  He was an alcoholic all his life and had learned it from his Dad. I was very careful, as drinking was not something I wanted in my life, although I did drink on weekends like at a dance or a dinner party.  He would talk and talk.  About, how going to AA had helped him so much. He had a better understanding of how to work out problems without using alcohol.   He had amends to make as well, with his children, family members, co-workers, etc.  He wanted to be a better person. It took me 2 months before we had our first kiss.  He would come over to my place in the evening and we would have ice tea outside.  And, he would talk about his life.  All of it.  I listened to every story he had to say about his family, his Mother and Father, brothers, his ex-wife, his children, his disease (alcohol). Eventually after about one year, the next softball season came upon us and we joined the same team.  He became a popular and was well liked by all.  Especially the ladies. the guys were jealous of him.  He liked to brag about his sport's skills, and about his AA recovery.  That was fine, but hearing it all the time it becomes an Ah-ha moment. Without having good problem solving skills in life, a person does not know how to find solutions to their everyday challenges.  An alcoholic cannot find a way to resolution, therefore drinking is the solution. Eventually we

became a couple.  Slowly, we talked and got to know each other.  I was not sure I liked everything about him.  He used to "spit".  I told him to stop that and use a kleenex, it was gross! He used to swear, which I hated, I asked him to stop doing that too.  This was his old alcoholic behavior talking.,.,  Gradually those things went away.  He worked on himself.  I was proud of him, but still cautious. He was a smoker, and I was not.  He never smoked around me, but he said he was willing to quit, (and I know that's really hard).  He went on the patch at first it helps you to quit.  But he cheated. He would smoke with the patch. Finally after a few months he said he manged to quit for good.  Or so he said. The patch helped him not get the cravings. One day, he was out at the mall, we were living together by then, it had been a year, so I was good with us living together.  That day, I decided to go to the mall to the get something at the drug store.  The mall had a food court and he would meet his AA buddies there, have coffee, and do lotto scratch tickets. When I got to the mall, I finished my shopping and was at the cash and saw him sitting with one of his buddies, doing a scratch ticket and smoking! So much for telling me he quit!  He lied.... I hated liars.  I went over and confronted him.  I was calm, but shaking inside.  I told him I didn't like liars and I didn't want to see him again.  I walked back to my apartment. I don't remember if it was the same day or the next day in the early evening he knocked on my door.  He said he was sorry he lied.  I couldn't help what else he lied about.  He asked me to forgive him and would really quit smoking and never lie to me again. That was not true.  There were many times, he lied about things.  I think it had to do with being so used to lying to his family about his drinking and hiding things, it was second nature to him. But...I was tired of being alone.  I enjoyed his company. I had grown fond of him so I gave him a 2nd chance. Eventually, we took a trip to Kelowna, BC to visit some friends that lived there.  We stayed at a beautiful bed and breakfast.  We fell in love with this small town. Later the following year, we decided to move out there because we thought it was beautiful.  So that August, we moved to Kelowna in 1997. I found part time work at the Real Canadian Super Store, and he was on disability for his back, since he had had a couple of surgeries on his back.  When we moved to Kelowna we had to quit our jobs, but for him he pretended to have back issues so he could get long term disability for 2 years. I got tired of him not working and being home all day.  He started whining about things because he had no car, as I was using it to go to work.  We moved to Richmond the following year, cause I wanted to work full time and in Kelowna full time jobs that pay well are scarce.  After we moved, he was still on disability. He could not find work.... He still lied about things.  During that year in  1999, he found a job being a sales rep for an artificial plant company, that would sell plants to restaurants, or commercial offices. One day he took me by surprise, he said he went to the GM dealer to buy a used van so he could carry the plastic plants around in it, as these plants were quite large.  But I really didn't want to be in debt for a van, which meant another 320.00$ a month. In the long run, no one would buy any plastic plants so he never made a sale. But, we still had the van to pay for.  After 2 years his disability ran out, and there was no more money coming in from his side. In the year 2000, in the month of July, he sat me down in the kitchen and told me we had to move back to Montreal, since he could not find a job in BC. I was devastated. He also said we had to file for bankruptcy because he could not pay rent or insurance any more.  He had zero money coming in.  We were married by then, back in Kelowna we had the Minister come to our house and we had a very small wedding in our living room. So, I would be dragged into bankruptcy too.  He

told me he would take the van and drive back to Montreal with two of our dogs.  I would fly down in a couple of weeks with the other small dog. It was a very difficult period.  I had to give my convertible back to the bank as we could not afford to keep both vehicles.  I was furious, I resented him and what we would have to go through.  I had never been a person who had bad credit. Once he was in Montreal he found a place for us to live, and he did find work almost right away.  We went to a solvency company and declared bankruptcy.  I was ashamed, humiliated, angry and embarrassed all at the same time.  I blamed my husband for having to put us through this. It was easy for me to find a job a couple of weeks after, we moved back to Montreal.  Between the two of us we wanted to rebuild our lives, so we started to invest in RRSP'S.  In 2 years we had enough for a down payment and moved to the suburbs of the suburbs. It was a really nice house, with an outdoor pool, a huge yard, and a Master bedroom downstairs with a private bathroom.  I loved it and we were happy for awhile. After about 6 months of being in the house, my husband became depressed.  His boss was "grinding" him, and there was conflict at work.  This made him grumble about everything he had to do around the house.  He lost interest in me. I encouraged him to write up a new resume, and start looking for another job.  So he did that and within 2 months he found something else, and quit the job he had. His behavior around me did not improve.  I felt him pull away.  Not sure if it was the depression or he just got tired of me.  It was 9 years we were together.  He felt broken, tired. We ended up selling our house and moving back to the West Island to be closer to our work.  The relationship was ending I could tell. We lived maybe 1 year in the new house and we decided to split up.  I moved out into a small townhouse and we split the little money that was left over from the sale. During this 6 month separation, I thought he would really look at what he wanted in life, at our relationship.  I thought he would work on "us", but it didn't happen. Instead; he flew to Hawaii for a softball tournament, where he met another female player called Louis. He knew her from other teams and they hooked up in Hawaii. At one point, I wanted him back, as I still loved him and I was heart broken that all of this happened.  So we tried re-connecting.  He thought he could have her and me at the same time.  I said no.  I said it is better for us to get a divorce now. He drew up the divorce papers and they were signed I think in 2005 or 2006.  The last time we were together and he left for the last time, I walked around the apartment feeling empty.  It was like the ghost of him was still there.  I went from room to room feeling his presence.  It was an awful feeling. It took me a long time to get over him. I'm not perfect.  I was hard on him, to push him to get that other job, to try to get him out of that depression.  Once he was apart from me, he found his joy back.  I could tell. For me, I decided to move to Ontario in early 2007.  Fourteen years later I was still in Ontario.  It was the year of 2012 that I realized I no longer had sad thoughts about me missing him.  I finally was free too, and went back to college to learn something new. I found a new career in medicine and loved it. After 5 years my joy had come back to me as well.  Since then, I am happy, working, almost retired but happy.  I have everything I need and want.  Single yes, but I have good friends that know me and know my heart. That's all I need. There probably will never be another man in my life.  I think 3 was enough.  At least now, if I create a mess with my life, it is my mess and I am not forced to fall into someone else's. I hope you enjoyed my memoirs.  I enjoyed writing about it.  It will give my children a chance to know more about my life once I am gone. Thank you Chickapea