#because LWJ is much to respectable and high-ranking to be a common MOUNT

[besanii]

dragon double happiness ficlet has only increased my want for noodle!wangji; any chance of something along the lines of 'wei wuxian finds the exact right spot on lan wangji's massive jaw to scratch to make him purr like a jet plane engine, cheerfully does this while everyone else looks on w their eyebrows raised at this shameless display'? thank u so much for sharing the delights that come out of ur brain

Extra 09: Mount (坐骑) | previous parts here

“You know, when you told me we were gonna do something fun, I thought we were going to be hunting pheasants or something,” Wei Wuxian sniffs, taking a bite out of the peach in his hand, his legs dangling from the tree branch. “Not watching you fail to catch subdue a zuoqi.”

He grins at the rude gesture Jiang Cheng sends his way and sits back against the tree trunk to watch him stalk his prey. It’s been about eight hours now, and he is still nowhere close to capturing the bi fang niao that lives in this forest. At some point, about an hour or so ago, he had gotten within a hundred metres of it before the bird had rushed past him in a blaze of fire and disappeared again. Since then, there has been neither sight nor sound of it.

“Say, Jiang Cheng, why do you suddenly want a zuoqi anyway?” Wei Wuxian asks. “Where are you even gonna keep a bi fang niao at Lotus Pier?”

“It’s not for me,” Jiang Cheng bites out through gritted teeth. “It’s for Nie Huaisang. His birthday is in a couple of days and he doesn’t have a zuoqi.”

“Aw that’s so nice of you,” Wei Wuxian coos. “I didn’t know you were such good friends with Nie-xiong that you would risk your life to catch him a bi fang niao. Why are you so nice to him anyway? You’ve never offered to catch me an immortal beast before!”

He cackles as an enraged squawk sounds from somewhere to his left where Jiang Cheng had disappeared amongst the trees. It’s followed immediately by a flash of fire, the smell of singed hair, and Jiang Cheng’s voice swearing profusely. A moment later, the bi fang niao reappears in the little glen Wei Wuxian is lounging about in, its green and red feathers ruffled, a black sooty mark across its white beak.

Wei Wuxian sighs and tosses away the peach pit. This is why you never get a fish to do a fox’s job.

He leaps out of the tree, shifting back into his original form in mid-air, and lands on the bird’s back, sinking his teeth into its neck. The bi fang niao panics and tries to throw him off, but he holds on tight enough to not be thrown off, but not too tight as to snap its neck. It’s a delicate process, but he knows what he’s doing. Unlike Jiang Cheng.

When the bird’s thrashing grows too violent, Wei Wuxian cuts his losses and lets go, landing on his feet several metres away. He reverts back to his human form and summons Suibian to hand, pointing it at his prey just as Jiang Cheng appears on the other side of the trees with Sandu. The bi fang niao, exhausted and injured, sees itself cornered after an eight-hour chase, decides to surrender.

It bows its long, crane-like neck to the ground and changes into its human form, a young man wearing green robes and red robes in the same colour as its feathers. He raises his head and looks between Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng.

“You have defeated me,” he says solemnly. “I hereby pledge my allegiance to you, and promise to serve you faithfully and to the best of my ability.”

Wei Wuxian shakes his head.

“Oh no, not me,” he laughs, clapping Jiang Cheng on the shoulder. “This guy’s the one you should be looking to.”

Jiang Cheng shrugs his hand off with a scowl.

“This is why Nie Huaisang gets a zuoqi and you don’t,” he tells him waspishly. “You’re perfectly capable of catching your own, so don’t complain about not getting one.”

“Yeah, but it’s the thought that counts,” Wei Wuxian says with a pout. “Don’t you love me enough to catch me a zuoqi, Jiang Cheng? I’m your brother.”

“Get your precious Lan-er-dianxia to catch you one then!”

“Hah! I don’t need a zuoqi,” Wei Wuxian says triumphantly. “I have Lan Zhan!”

Almost as if on cue, there is a rumble of thunder from the sky and the clouds part for a silvery white dragon to descend on them. Bi Fang is so startled he falls back on his behind, eyes wide with fear as he looks to the two of them for help, but Jiang Cheng is just scowling at the newcomer, while Wei Wuxian is jumping up and down, waving his arms.

The dragon disappears into the trees, and Lan Wangji walks into the glen a moment later in human form. Bi Fang gasps and prostrates himself on the ground with a garbled “Er-dianxia!”; Jiang Cheng bows and offers a curt greeting. Wei Wuxian, however, bounds over to Lan Wangji and latches onto him without hesitation.

“Lan Zhan!” he chirps. “Look what we caught! He’s for Nie-xiong, isn’t he grand?”

Lan Wangji’s amber eyes glance at Bi Fang appraisingly.

“Well done,” he says, and pats Wei Wuxian on the head. “Are you ready to go home, Wei Ying?”

Wei Wuxian nods. “I want Lan Zhan to carry me!”

“Alright,” Lan Wangji agrees readily. “Just a moment.”

He steps away from Wei Wuxian and closes his eyes. Jiang Cheng catches on just in time to grab Bi Fang by the collar and drag him out of the way of Lan Wangji’s lengthening body, winding in and out of the trees until only his massive silvery-white head is visible. Wei Wuxian hums happily and kisses his muzzle, scratching enthusiastically at a spot beneath his powerful jaw.

“Thank you, Lan Zhan, you’re the best,” he croons.

The large, reptilian eyes slide closed as a long, hot breath leaves its nostrils. And then, to Jiang Cheng and Bi Fang’s disbelief, another rumble, this time much louder and much closer, shakes the ground beneath their feet as Lan Wangji purrs with pleasure.

“Zhuren,” Bi Fang whispers, tugging at Jiang Cheng’s sleeve. “What—”

“Ugh, don’t ask,” Jiang Cheng says, rolling his eyes in disgust. “Just…don’t. Hey, Wei Wuxian, aren’t you meant to be leaving?”

Lan Wangji fixes him with a glare that would have melted the flesh off a lesser immortal, but Jiang Cheng only folds his arms and glares back. Wei Wuxian sticks his tongue out at him and gives Lan Wangji a last pat before clambering onto his back, grabbing onto his horns for balance.

“See you back at home, Cheng-Cheng!” he shouts. “Let’s go, Lan Zhan!”

He whoops with glee as Lan Wangji raises his head and takes off into the sky in one, smooth motion, leaving behind a gobsmacked Bi Fang and an irritated Jiang Cheng.

“Zhuren, did he just…” Bi Fang looks like he’s about to faint with the knowledge that someone had dared to use the Second Prince as a mount, as if he were any ordinary beast.

Jiang Cheng sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“That’s not even the worst of it,” he says heavily. “Just…don’t think to much about it. Don’t even look too hard. Come on, I’ll take you to meet your real master.”

Notes:

zuoqi (坐骑) - a mount, a steed; for immortals, they have to hunt and subdue an immortal beast and win its loyalty before they can use/gift it as a mount

bi fang niao (毕方鸟) - a one-legged, crane-like bird from Chinese mythology, associated with fire and good luck (also the mount that Zhe Yan catches for Bai Zhen in Three Lives Three Worlds)

Zhuren (主人) - master

// buy me a ko-fi //