#being quiet was the most important virtue bc he was worn out from work lack of ssleep and/or depression | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

amerasdreams · 2 years

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So... dad didn't eat the food I made. Mom did. I assumed she didn't bc she isn't here for lunch. Idk what was going on in my head. Occasionally she brings things I made to work. Doesn't tell me. I don't mind if either of them do it. Just that dad never does. So I took his doing something abnormal for being spiteful and wanting me away. Which... I probably get bc I assume hat anyway. Lots of room for assumptions when you have an almost total lack of communication and the history of me... never thinking dad cared much for me so ....

But this is totally not his fault. I can't accuse someone for something they didn't do. Panicking about something totally nonexistent (in this case)

#tho i dont think i can ever be convinced dad likes me #or wouldnt rather i was gone #childhood he was there but absent #being quiet was the most important virtue bc he was worn out from work lack of ssleep and/or depression #which u dont understand as a kid #idk how to repair a broken relationship #get beyond that...foundation #here is my psychiatrist couch or sth...#yay whoohoo #yay u get to see too much in my mind u didnt ask for #but if i wrote the 1st u have to see this so u ddont get wrong impression #dummkopf

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