#bestie im gonna be real w/ u i am NOT used to writing queen bee cady but im trying!!

[itr0ars]

cady hasn’t missed homeschool in forever, for your information. she doesn’t miss being left to her own devices, of which there were next to none in the matter of gadgetry manufactured after the twentieth century. yes, she had fun making cairns out of broken abaci, but now she has real interests, like keeping up with music that makes her ears cry and going to malls that give her hypothermia. she doesn’t miss extirpating essays and dioramas obsessed with the past and ruining her chances at a normal future with friends and/or loyal followers. yes, she was too busy applying cuticle creams under her desk to pay attention to their analysis the tragedy of julius caesar, but she trusts that mentally homogenising those parties can only end in happiness. she doesn’t miss her parents picking her up. yes, she hates the bus because it’s always late and the driver always has to get out and argue with the owners of pets he almost runs over, but she barely talks to them over breakfast anymore, anyways.

maybe she misses gretchen treating her like a person instead of a sounding board. she can see the lecture hall now as they step out of school; squint a little and she can read the sans serif text tepidly projected onto a screen: why is gretchen wieners so desperate, so voluble, so courageous yet so compliant? are her mating instincts triggered by seeing memes about regina’s pole being thoroughly rocked? does her existence rely on a hamster wheel spun by noise? there’s a voice in her head going stop thinking that, she’s your friend and another going stop thinking that she’s your friend but cady knows that if she stops thinking she’ll have to start thinking about getting her test signed and getting her hair wet because the sky’s turned a deep, dark grey and gretchen must’ve talked herself vacant of saliva an hour ago.

@fetchkitty — ❛ is there anything else i can do for you? ❜ ( accepting. )

that’s better, gretch. use the somewhat pretty head beneath that secret-holding hair for something productive. “ well, i know we’re technically rivals now, but you’d never let that get between our friendship, right? i mean, it’d be totally awkward if you or karen had to dance with any of the nominees for king. “ the smile on her face is totally murdering her zygomaticus muscles. her nails are digging into the crumpled paper that is her calculus test, but her other hand is reaching for gretchen’s and she hopes that’s enough of a distraction. “ i was thinking we could update all of my social media accounts. wouldn’t want someone digging up my linkedin and deciding i care too much about the degradation of nairobi national park to be cool. ” she clears her throat before she can start citing the university of hawaiʻi. discussion for another time, with another time meaning when she’s lowered into her grave. “ for example. “

she attempts to retrieve her water bottle from her backpack, dislodging even more of kevin’s business cards. the wind sends them soaring to the quad, the bus stop, wherever the cady who cared too much about pollution went. “ when are you getting picked up? maybe we could spend some time at a restaurant or your house or whatever. “