#binge listened to all of season 1 just yesterday trying to remember how to do the voices

[pagesofkenna]

Familiar

a short Skyjacks: Courier's Call slice-of-life kittenfic

Everyone has a job aboard the Red Audron, and everyone pitches in.

A breeze blew in the open window, dislodging loose stacks of envelopes and threatening to flip over pages of the logbook. Lizander stopped the pages with a white paw. He slipped the thin envelope from between his teeth into the current page of the book, marking the spot, then heaved the heavy lid of the book shut with a hind leg.

Another soft gust toppled a stack of letters nearby. One or two slid behind a wooden crate, and Lizander jumped down from the desk to go retrieve them. The floor beneath his paws reverberated slightly as footsteps approached, and he had just enough time to duck out of the way before the mailroom door was tossed open with a slam.

“Mail time!!” Cecelia exclaimed. A few more carefully arranged stacks of letters were overturned, but the apprentice didn’t even seem to notice. She stomped into the room, with June, carrying a large box, and Kiran close at her heels.

[read the rest on AO3]

[purplesurveys]

1281

survey by chasingghosts

Who?

Who was the last person you had an intelligent debate with? Not so sure - maybe Angela and Reena. Our group chat will occasionally veer towards serious topics.

Who was the last person who cooked something for you? Dad, I believe; but I can also hear my mom preparing breakfast downstairs so she will be the next last person haha.

Who was the last person who you heard singing? Other than me, my co-worker Dev’s sibling when we had our weekly ~fade-out-slash-bonding call with the rest of the team last Friday. She had left her mic on while we were all doing the last remaining bits of work for the week and I could hear her sibling humming in the background.

Who was the last person you kissed and it meant something? My ex.

Who was the last person you were upset with? Myself.

Who was the last person you danced with? I don’t really dance with other people unless...like, drunk. But I guess my swaying and bouncing with Angela when we watched Sowoozoo counts.

Who was the last person you felt awkward around? The food delivery rider who was bringing food my aunt wanted to send over to us yesterday. He seemed very confused for reasons I’m still very confused by lmao, so it all made for an awkward encounter. 

Who was the last person who borrowed something from you? My mom went into my closet last week to grab something of mine, but I have no idea what it was since I had been half-asleep when she walked in.

Who was the last person who showed you how to do something? My dad taught me how to make coffee that wasn’t from a 3-in-1 sachet lol.

Who was the last person you went shopping with? I don’t really go shopping, much less with other people.

Who was the last person you had a crush on? I haven’t crushed on anyone since my ex, and the people I find attractive nowadays are all celebrities haha.

Who was the last person who made you cry? Myself.

Who was the last person you shared a bed with? Oh, that’s been a while. Still Gabie, I’m pretty sure.

Who was the last person you got drunk with? We were quite a bunch at Angela’s place two weeks ago, but I’ll name a few - her, Reena, Pia, Hans, Al.

Who was the last person who touched your hair? Not sure. Maybe my dad.

What?

What was the last pair of shoes you wore? It was a pair of adidas sneakers.

What was the last birthday party you attended? The last birthday celebration (not necessarily a party) I went to was Angela’s. I darted to her house straight after work that day cos there was no way I was going to miss out on her birthday.

What was the last thing you said to your mother? I think it was just to bid her goodnight last night.

What was the last song you listened to? Seesaw by Suga.

What was the last thing you thought about before going to sleep last night? I was thinking about my headache and how I wanted to fall asleep immediately.

What was the last fun thing you did with your family? We had a Zoom party yesterday to celebrate my cousin Bree’s 12th birthday! Her family sent over takoyaki, milk tea, and pizza to all the households who went and we watched the birthday clips we sent for Bree. It was a lot of fun and it was a super nice break from how monotonous my weekends could be.

What was the last thing you borrowed from someone? My sister’s microfiber cloth so that I could clean my glasses.

What was the last vegetable you ate? I’m blanking out...which is weird because my dad puts veggies in most of the dinners he makes hahaha. Probably something like lettuce or pechay??

What was the last thing you bought online? My friends and I pre-ordered the second season of In The Soop so that we can watch it when it premieres later in the month. We’ll also have to purchase our tickets to BTS’ next online concert that’ll be happening this month too...thanks for reminding me I have to raise it with them haha.

What was the last thing you had to drink? I haven’t had to drink anything recently but the last thing I took a sip of was my coffee.

What was the last reason you went to see a doctor? Continued from yesterday morning. I had had a fever all week long and we couldn’t figure out how to lower my temperature, so we needed to go so I could finally be diagnosed with whatever it was. It turned out to be a UTI.

What was the last non-food item you purchased? Pre-order slots for a pay-per-view series.

What was the last type of yoghurt you ate? Ooh, I don’t like yogurt. I’m blanking out on the last time I had it.

What was the last fast food place you ate at? I haven’t dined in at a fast food place in a while – I think it may have been Jollibee, when Angela and I met up back in February. But I did get KFC for delivery a few weeks ago.

What was the last thing that bothered you and kept you awake? Doesn’t really happen to me nowadays. I get knocked out most nights.

When?

When was the last time you embarrassed yourself? I guess yesterday? I went to Starbucks to work for a little bit but since I hadn’t done dine-in for a couple of months, I had no idea the government modified the rules a bit and required people to bring their vaccination cards if they wanted to dine in. The barista explained the new rule and I ended up profusely apologizing because I didn’t have mine on me, and I also offered that I could just do take out; but she was nice and let me off the hook and just confirmed with me if I’ve had my shots.

When was the last time you watched a movie with someone? Just myself. I did watch Squid Game - binge-watched all 9 episodes straight - with my sister last Saturday, though.

When was the last time you charged your phone? Earlier this afternoon.

When was the last time you were sick with a cold? I dunno. 1 or 2 years ago, maybe? I rarely get colds.

When was the last time you spoke to a family member on the phone? Yesterday when my mom called me up.

When was the last time it rained where you live? Earlier today. Explains why it’s been humid the last few days.

When was the last time you laid awake, unable to sleep? Like I said, struggling to fall asleep doesn’t really happen to me anymore. I usually exhaust myself until I feel like I can pass out the second I close my eyes.

When was the last time you met someone new? I want to say two Fridays ago when I pitched a presentation to a new set of people but still within a client brand we manage.

When was the last time you filled up your car with petrol/gas? I don’t drive a lot, so it’s been a few months.

When was the last time you ate popcorn? Don’t like popcorn so I honestly can’t remember. My mom makes them occasionally though so I may have grabbed one or two just to have something to chew, sometime within the year.

When was the last time you went to a school event? March last year. A school event that had been held on a Friday was literally the last place I was at – by the time that very next Monday rolled around, classes were already suspended.

When was the last time you took the trash out? I’m not normally in charge of that chore so I haven’t done it.

When was the last time you did anything to change your appearance? Like...10 minutes ago? I just fixed my bun since my hair had started to look disheveled from being up all day.

When was the last time you cooked at home? Sometime in like November last year when I tried to make a sandwich. Anyway, my dad just left today to finally head back to his work for the first time in nearly two years, and I told myself (and him) that I should try to learn cooking at least one meal so that I can manage well while he’s gone haha.

When was the last time you had a sleepover? Maybe January of last year.

Where?

Where did you last go shopping for clothing? Not sure about physical spaces but I did open my Zalora app recently to look for cute bucket hats that I’ll probably never buy anyway hahaha.

Where did you last go on a date to? I don’t even remember. I deleted all photos a long time ago.

Where was the last wedding you went to? Manila Cathedral, if I’m not mistaken. This was well over a decade ago, though. I haven’t been to any other wedding since.

Where did you last park your car, other than home? Angela’s house when I visited a couple of weeks ago.

Where did you last leave your keys? Dining table.

Where did your last kiss take place? By my ex’s car when I was bidding her goodbye.

Where did you last go for a walk to? The mall, yesterday.

Where did you last take a vacation to? It was a staycation more than anything, but we stayed at Tagaytay for a night at the start of this year to celebrate my dad’s birthday.

Where did you last go to celebrate your own birthday? We stayed at home. I reported to work that day then just had a huge dinner with my family haha.

Where was the last place you had dinner at? No clue. I want to say Ramen Nagi? when I ate there on my own last February.

Where did you last go to exercise? Rooftop since it’s open-space and no one can see me.

Where did you last take public transport to? I don’t take public transport.

Where does the last person you hung out with live? A city close to mine.

Where did you last visit for the first time? A Korean restaurant close to Angela’s place.

Where did you last take a photo? Just my room.

[rylie-studies]

ten questions! ✨

I was tagged by the amazing Yasemin (@study-van) who’s absolutely lovely and sweet; thank you for tagging me, loves! 🤍

Rules: Answer the questions, then tag ten people with ten other questions of your own. 

#1: What achievement are you most proud of?

Although I’m proud of many of my achievements as they have helped me to become the person I am at the moment, I’d say that graduating high school was one of my proudest achievements so far! It wasn’t that I thought I wasn’t gonna be able to graduate, but because I just think about how challenging those high school years were (especially junior & senior year) in terms of balancing everything, my mental health, taking care of myself, everything dealing with applying to college, etc and how I continuously felt so exhausted and wanted to give up so many times. However, I didn’t and I was just so extraordinarily happy once I got that diploma last month! Absolutely over the moon. 

#2: Would you go to space if given the chance?

Of course! Space has always been this concept that I always think about everyday (especially at night when I’m just relaxing in bed) and I would love to just observe everything, see all the beautiful stars, galaxies, and planets, and see what’s out there. My heart has been calling for space ever since I was born! 

#3: What’s the kindest thing someone’s done for you?

Whenever someone’s kind to me, I’m always so grateful for it and I don’t think I can choose the kindest one; however, one thing that I vividly remember is when my friend, a few years ago, made me a personalized painting of everything that I’m fascinated with and love such as tennis, reading, books, writing, and more!

#4: What experience changed who you are as a person?

Moving to the United States at a young age is definitely an experience that has changed me as a person; I feel like living here has really shaped my perspective and the person I’ve become. I often think about what my life would’ve been if my family had stayed in the Philippines and I just know that I’d be a completely different person now if that happened. 

#5: What show got cancelled/ended that you wished didn’t?

Game of Thrones, all the way! I feel like, due to the groundbreaking popularity of the show, the directors could’ve made a few more seasons to really invest their time on character development and allowing the storyline to end well. Although I watched the whole thing last summer (took me about four days), I’m still so frustrated by how they ended it and how the directors (or is it writers idk y’all) just wanted to throw away the whole franchise and move on to other shows bcs it was clearly rushed and incomplete and I just genuinely hate Season 8 so much. It’s to the point where I watch so many clips of the show and want to rewatch everything so bad, but I can’t even physically bring myself to do that because it just ends so....terribly. 

#6: Dusk or dawn?

Although I’m content with both, I’d have to choose dawn! I just love seeing the sunlight early in the morning (and watching the sunrise is a whole entire cosmic experience tbh) and it allows me to be thankful for getting another opportunity to live again! 

#7: If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?

There’s a lot of things that I would change about the world, but one of the biggest ones would be to change the way we see people and how we become attracted to them. I saw this post in the past where it said, “I wish we could see each other’s souls rather than our faces,” and I think about that thought every single day because I feel like, as a society, no matter how hard we try, we still use appearances as a major factor (especially when it comes to love) and I think it’d be really fascinating to see each other’s souls first and go on from there!

#8: What’s your favorite candy?

Okay tbh I’m not really a candy type of person?? Like I guess I prefer salty foods over sweet ones, but if I really had to pick one, I’d pick Twix, maybe? I used to eat it a lot before and, one time, for Christmas, my mom’s friend got my siblings and I each a really long Twix bar and, yeah, needless to say, we never finished it. 

#9: What is the last song you’ve listened to?

Comethru by Jeremy Zucker! I’ve always known about the chorus of the song, but I never actually listened to the full song then I heard the chorus again in a Tiktok yesterday and I finally decided to listen to the whole song and ended up listening to it for like four hours. It’s such a soft and beautiful song!! 

#10: Do you listen to ASMR? 

Not really, well I guess I’ve never really tried to listen to it before? I think it’s a relatively interesting concept though! 

Here are my questions!! 🤍

#1: What are you looking forward to the most in the upcoming school (both high school and university level) year?

#2: If you could choose to live in any country in the world, which one would it be and why?

#3: What’s a book that resonates with you the most and you’ll read it as many times as you possibly can?

#4: What do you usually do before you sleep at night?

#5: If you got the chance to converse with your ten year old self, what’s one thing that you would say to them?

#6: If there weren’t any expectations or pressures given to you, what would you want your life to look like in the future? What job will you have? Where will you live?

#7: What’s a song that seems timeless to you and it always feels like you’re listening to it for the first time everytime?

#8: What’s the first show that you can remember ever binge watching?

#9: Did you watch Disney Channel when you were young? If so, what was your favorite show and why? Or, if you didn’t watch Disney Channel, what was your favorite show as a kid?

#10: Choose a random line from your favorite song of all time/the song that you’re currently obsessed with if you can’t pick one. 

I’m gonna go ahead and tag these lovelies: @lunarduckstudies, @vazublr, @studyfajr, @redlitmusbluelitmus, @headgirlstudy, @seltzerstudies, @serendistudy, @procrastilate, @elleandhermione, and @fluencylevelfrench!! I hope you guys have fun with the questions if you choose to do it!! 🤍✨

[gotatext]

PREFERRED NAME — nora. i think i started going by it in like, 2009?? my full name is eleanor but i hated it n thought it was way too pretentious n i never felt like it fitted me so when i started writing on forums i decided i’d be a nora rather than eleanor and then my school friends called me it and it just kinda stuck, the only person who calls me eleanor is my mum

PRONOUNS — she / her / ethereal being beyond comprehension

AGE — 23 but i tell everyone im 21 because even tho time is literally fake im desperately clinging to that fleeting thing we call youth trying to catch it like smoke in my hands

PINTEREST — i actually have two. this one is my main one where i just cram all my shit n i’ve had it for years and some of its super unorganised. then i also have this one which is one i made for exclusively female characters. it started as mythological figures but now its like, women in literature and the occasional oc as well. variety is the spice of life!

DISCORD — lindsay lohan’s meth#8664

TUMBLR (PERSONAL/MUSE/RPH) — i used to be froseths but now im pvrscphones cos ya gal is a fucking whore for mythology 

OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE — oi oi guvna ere’s me twitta. also here’s my letterboxd n my goodreads if anyone still uses tht

MYER-BRIGGS — enfp / infp border .... the classic profile of a lit student

HP HOUSE — hufflepuff, am fuckin mad. 

ZODIAC — libra which is a joke because i am in no way balanced but i guess i AM indecisive and a peacekeeper so?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY? — i believe it when it says good shits gonna happen in my life and blame it if bad shit happens but i don’t strongly follow it i just find it interesting

HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU STARTED RPING ON TUMBLR — maybe like 14?? my first rp blog here is literally so embarassing i wrote as clove from the hunger games n my best friend irl wrote cato :/ it was wild

WHAT YEAR WAS IT? — like 9 years ago?? 2010 maybs

NAME A RANDOM ROLEPLAY THAT STICKS OUT IN YOUR MEMORY — me n my friend ellie made this really cool group the summer before we left for uni which was loosely based on a concept mentioned mayb once in the divergent series, but it gave us loads of freedom to make it our own thing. it was called the fringe n it was like..... this dystopian society where people with different genes were cut off from the rest of society n lived in overrun slum cities where different groups had like, a monopoly over weapons, produce, etc.... my character jack was the leader of this lost-boy-esque tribe called the wolf pack who were hunters n used to run across the rooftops wearing the skins of animals they’d killed and engage in tribal rituals with sacrifices to the gods n shit. sounds lame but everyone there was so invested in their character arcs that it was a shame to see it go. but ! it kind of reached its end point so we blew it up w nukes n they all died. tragic.

WHAT WEIRD ANIMAL WOULD YOU HAVE AS A PET IF IT WAS REALISTIC — a fox?? do ppl keep foxes? idk i’ve always just felt a sense of connection w them like when a fox stares at me im like this shit is life i am living and breathing in this bitch.... visceral

NAME THE FIRST SONG ON YOUR DISCOVER WEEKLY ON SPOTIFY OR THE FIRST SONG THAT COMES ON APPLE MUSIC / ITUNES SHUFFLE — everbody party tonight by cobra man n summer girl by haim..... not my usual stuff but big summer chillin vibes,.....

NAME A BOOK THAT YOU READ IN SCHOOL THAT YOU SURPRISINGLY LIKED — lord of the flies and also the handmaid’s tale. one of assignments was to write a chapter from another character’s perspective n i chose moira

NAME A BOOK YOU HATED THAT MOST PEOPLE LIKED — skellig. fuck off with ur asprin ugly bat man i don’t care. also of mice and men. don’t care about the rabbits or curley’s goddamn wife.

WHAT TV SHOW DID YOU RECENTLY BINGE? — im not a big binger bc i find it jst makes me depressed if i watch tv all day but im nearly finished stranger things season 3 n i recently finished euphoria (big rec but proceed w caution as quite triggering content)

FAVOURITE QUOTE — cool girl speech from gone girl. but also “there’s something dangerous about the boredom of teenage girls” i know its like.... such an overused quote but it really encapsulates this kind of feral girlhood that a few of my characters like bridget n greta have tapped into. i also loved the line “i feel like i could eat the world raw” from song of achilles, that really captures this kind of.... pure n childlike enthusiasm tht i wanna achieve w rory 

LINK TO A VINE THAT EXUDES YOUR ‘ENERGY’ — this is my energy completely am always covered in glitter n staring broodily out of the windows of ubers at 4am like im in the sad bit of an indie film 

DO YOU WRITE OUTSIDE OF RP? WHAT DO YOU WRITE? — uhh.... not as much as i shd.... i want to be a writer so i shd be makin some effort to get my stuff Out Into The World but im just not.... lol. ive done a lot of poetry collections . i wnt to finish a novel @ some point too.

THREE YOUTUBERS YOU STILL TRUST — bold of you to assume i trust any youtubers

A CELEBRITY CRUSH THAT JUST WON’T QUIT — id literally die for saoirse ronan n timothee chalamet :/ chance perdomo also owns my ass. 

EVER MEET A CELEBRITY? SHARE YOUR STORY — i once high-fived dani harmer, the actress who played tracy beaker. today my sister text me tryin to make me guess what celebrity she just saw on holiday in wales and for ages she let me think it was timmothee but it was actually bradley walsh from the chase :/

WHAT’S YOUR PICTURE-PERFECT NIGHT? — i am in a bomb ass crop top and mini skirt, several scrunchies in my hair, glitter all over my face, wearing cowboy boots. we eat dinner in a trendy but affordable pub that doubles up as a cocktail bar n then we drink zombies or sex on the beaches n go to a rave where everyone is on the same wavelength n i share drugs with girls in the toilets and we swap numbers knowing we will never text each other but its ok bc in that moment we feel like we are soulmates and everyone is super drunk n touching everyone else n its all very visceral and we walk through the woods when the rave ends and lie in the grass because we wish to suck out all the marrow of life 

A CONSPIRACY THEORY YOU KINDA BELIEVE IN — princess diana was murdered 

ARE ALIENS REAL? — maybe the real aliens are the friends we made along the way

PLAY ANY PHONE GAMES? WHICH ONES? — love island game im addicted and way too invested in my fictional relationship with bobby, a cartoon

WHAT’S A FILM YOU LOVED WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG AND RECENTLY WATCHED, ONLY TO FIND OUT YOU DON’T ANYMORE — bold of u to assume i remember my childhood. but if we’re talking last 10 years angust, thongs n perfect snogging is so so cringe 

DO YOU COLLECT ANYTHING? — pairs of glasses belonging to other ppl when they break / get new ones even though i can see perfectly well. 

WHAT’S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BUT YOU’RE TOO LAZY? — mythology...... always a craving and a wish i’d read like ancient texts but my school wasn’t good enough to do greek or latin or any of that shit n even tho i could read english translations i cant be bothered. also criminal psychology

THREE LANGUAGES YOU DON’T SPEAK, BUT WISH YOU COULD — italian, french and latin

MOVIE YOU’VE WATCHED MORE THAN 5 TIMES — ladybird, about time, angus thongs, shrek 2, what we do in the shadows, the history boys, atonement, coraline, the breakfast club, ferris bueller’s day off

NAME A FICTIONAL CHARACTER FROM TV/FILM/MOVIE/GAME/BOOK THAT YOU FIND YOURSELF PROJECTING ON / YOU RELATE TO — cecilia lisbon. rue in euphoria. alison brie in glow. adam parrish in the raven cycle. richard papen. olivia cooke’s character in thoroughbreds. allen ginsberg in kill your darlings. lily in sex education. holliday grainger’s character in the film animals --- i too am an aspiring writer who never writes and just gets drunk instead .

DO YOU FOLLOW ANY SPORTS? WHO DO YOU ROOT FOR? — no. cba

HOBBIES BESIDES WASTING AWAY HERE? — i go to the movies basically every day bcos i work in a cinema. im also a voracious reader n i occasionally do theatre or costume making

PLUG A TV SHOW / MOVIE / BOOK / VIDEO GAME / ETC… YOU WISH MORE PEOPLE WOULD CHECK OUT — where the wild things are (film by spike jonze).  animals. beats. the book fen by daisy johnson and a girl is a half formed thing by eimar mcbride. andy warhol’s biography from a to b and back again

WHOSE BRAIN WOULD YOU LIKE TO PICK, ALIVE OR DEAD? — phoebe waller-bridge on how i get her life. carey mulligan on how she got to be such a good actress n how i can become her. maybs wes anderson. maybs gillian flynn. i tend to listen to podcasts w the ppl i really wanna pick the brains of.

TEAM EDWARD OR JACOB? — edward :/

LAST MOVIE SEEN IN THEATRE — blinded by the light n i lovd it

DO YOU STILL READ? — when i finished uni i kinda got out of the habit but this week i finished two books so ive set myself the challenge of a book a week.

IF SO, WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? — i finished song of achilles yesterday n i also finished call me by your name yesterday. started circe by madeline miller today, im also partway through milkman by anna burns and the plays of annie barker

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DID YOU HATE FILLING THIS OUT? – 3 i didnt hate it bcos at heart i am self-indulgent and love fashioning some sense of self when i feel lost in a world that is scary and constantly changing 

[kaorei-endgame]

Ranking of Resident Evil save room themes?

I got my first latte of the season, it’s chilly enough to wear pants indoors, #Streamtober started yesterday. LET’S DO THIS, NICK. >:O 

17. Resident Evil 6 Chapter Ends, All Characters: Back to the cabbage patch. None of you are valid, with your Netflix Original knock-off of some ABC knock-off of 24-ass soundtrack. Go suck a giraffe’s dick with an Ada clone, Jake Muller.

16. Resident Evil, Deadly Silence: What is this Resident Evil for Babiez? Nintendogz+ResidentEvilz? Imagine listening to this on the crappy DS speakers. Wasn’t there something creepy about Jill’s costume in this game, like you could tear pieces of it off, or am I just conjuring fall memories and combining them with how they went out of the way to add boob bounce to the REmake 15 years after the fact, and now Jill’s boobs on PS4 undulate languidly beneath her shirt like a pair of Dragon Quest Slimes yearning to be free. This track: aural despair, unleavened. A way to quickly induce nausea in dogs who have eaten chocolate or raisins.

15. Resident Evil 6, Ada Chapter End: Well, okay, this one is all right. The first fifteen seconds feel like a HiFi version of a track from those Playstation 1 top-down shooters where you played a murder clown or a pyro guy escaping a space prison where you were held for crimes you definitely DID commit. The little background jog kicks in soon after and look, I’m a soft sell for ululation, what can I say.** But it just all just serves to stir memories like embers finally gone to smolder beneath the fireplace ash, stoking them after all these years, reminding me what a weird psycho they turned Ada into in this game. I like reflecting on how people got so mad about there not being co-op in Ada’s campaign that Capcom patched in a partner but his name is like “TeamMate” or “Buddy” and he has no lines of dialogue and is never addressed in the story in any way and thus is either a figment of Ada’s imagination or he’s a real dude who’s just pretty quiet and ultimately drowned on that sub? Well, I guess life’s tough if you’re the (potentially imagination) friend of an ex-spy turned pod person.

**(i contacted my musician friend, Kylie, who confirmed that ululation  was the term i was thinking of, lest i second guess myself. at the same time, i’ll post her text here lest i misrepresent her words “Yeah, ululate as a technical term is vibrato using the tongue, so that would be wrong, but ululate as a descriptor refers to a sound that has a very pronounced waver between tones to it.” cool! i’ve often wondered if that’s the most accurate way to describe it. thanks Kylie!! :D)

14. Resident Evil Revelations 2: Claire gets the best costumes probably across the whole series and yet it feels like she’s gotten the least love of all the main cast. I never really got it, she looks good in denim, whether jacket or pant, and her Revelations 2 blazer does her all the favors. But now they’re remaking RE2 and they turned her face into this weird porcelain Precious Moments dol—MY BELOVED DAUGHTER. MY MOIRA. I SWEAR I’LL FIND YOU. FOR THE SAKE OF JBLL I WILL AVENGE YOU AND THE OTHER ONE.

13. Resident Evil 0: What’s with all the shivery whiney stuff. Like your younger sibling running nails down the chalkboard of your spine, like how the speed run of this game hinges on juggling an evasive bat with 5 out of the 6 flame rounds on hand, so try. Neither relaxing nor scary. Do I hear something like a bongo in the distance? That is the clarion call of Becky Chamber’s goose booty coming home to roost.

12. Resident Evil 7: I had a dream last night about this game. If you have phobias about glass and/or mouths and/or wasp genitals, I would skip this paragraph. I was in the house where you have to run away from the mom with the disgusting wasp hive vagina. Also—unrelated and yet somehow related, as dreams always are—I had opened a beer bottle in such a way that the stem broke. I had decided to drink it anyway and now, as I progressed through the house, I found that there seemed to be endless small slivers of glass in my mouth that I had to repeatedly spit out lest they cut me. When I woke up, my jaw was clenched to the point of soreness. Welcome to the family, I guess. Otherwise this save room music reminds me of the game itself: mostly dull and barely there.

11. Resident Evil Revelations: Item Box Music, only Save Room Adjcanet. Can’t disassociate this from the “swish-swish-swish-SHUCK” sound effects of navigating menus to equip Charge Shot 2 to my Shotgun. Not as pleasing or as integrated into my bone marrow as  the Resident Evil 3 equivalent, but I have probably played this game through thirteen or fourteen times at this point. Life is short and yet the strings of fate tug us the directions they will.

10. Resident Evil 5: Again, this is menu music. No save rooms at all in this game. Anyway I have no inherent memory of this song because I’m sure I’ve talked over it while upgrading my M92FS to 100 bullet capacity 110% of the times I’ve played this game. Exempted from higher echelon of rankings on these technicalities, but still A POOR PERFORMANCE INDEED for Not The Best Resident Evil Yet Paradoxically The One That’s Given Me The Most Joy In My life.

9. Resident Evil, Dead Aim

: Wow I almost can’t believe I don’t remember this despite playing this game enough to write a speedrun guide for it. Well, that was the style at the time. As was a bloated zombie corpse boss, I suppose (long before Left 4 Dead, those copy cats), whose weak spot was its exposed brain which, halfway through the fight when you’d done enough damage, would pop out and dance a sprightly jig on its brainstem every time you shot it. With the whisper of wind and rain and single intermittent synth I feel like I’m living in a cyberpunk future and not a game whose protagonist’s “””cajun””” accent is as questionable as its presentation of the antagonist’s gender.

8. Resident Evil, Umbrella Chronicles

: Hey now, weird bit of the creepy-freaky bass here kind of does put you in a certain headspace, but it’s not the headspace i remember of this game, which was basically unplayable in co-op for the final 3rd because a failed QTE would result in a hunter slicing away half your health. Good for an Into the Breach playlist to keep you focused on the action and stop you from trying to play it while also binging a Netflix show about werewolves that you didn’t really like anyway, and splitting your attention between visual mediums is just getting Good Pilots Killed.

7. Resident Evil 2: Ominous. Maybe TOO Ominous at points. Aren’t save rooms about being safe? I guess we could argue that because the save room reflects the lacuna of safety  BING BONG piano is the Try Hard version of video game music asking “you scurred yet?” Perhaps a novice mistake from a first-time director who would go on to do so many great things (well, RE2 among them, no lie). In a way, this fits with Rookie Cop Leon S. Kennedy, and anyway it’s so over the top I’m kind of okay with it. Most innervating when first heard on your way to equip a cowgirl costume for fast-firing six-shooter action. Guns suck, and cowboys too, but both are okay if we experience them in the abstract sense. This is what culture teaches us. Fan the trigger.

6. Resident Evil 4: A surprisingly gentle one, considering the series turn towards action from which it would never recover. I am transported to the early minutes of a horror movie where the audience knows something the protagonist doesn’t about the terror that’s about to befall them while they blithely pick up a desiccated nudie mag in an old shed on a haunted property they inherited from their estranged uncle, more focused on the “ballistics” before them than the axe murderer crouched in the shadows of disused farm equipment behind.

5. Resident Evil 3, Nemesis: More languid riff on 2. Strings get you shivery, and no more than a single BONG per two measures proves that save room music is as much about the notes you DON’T play. Two bongs to scare, but one bong to keep you on your toes, disallowing you from getting *too* relaxed by the soothing bleeps and bloops as you combine the 3 Gunpowder As you just found to make sure you have enough ammo to pistol-juke the so-called unkillable Nemesis. You’re not coward, but that doesn’t make you brave. Discretion is the better part of valor, they say, but that’s not taking into account that non-discretiony valor rewards you directly with a faster-firing pistol with critical headshots. :3

4. Resident Evil 1, Vanilla: Gentle, plucky strings make you question your memory, more familiar with later revisions than you are this one. How often was I in this place? Or does its primacy belie its immediacy? If I went to the strange, pointless closet around the corner from this medicine save room, would I find a broken shotgun I expect there, a round of magnum ammo, or simply the ghost of discarded aspirations masking as memories. I recall a time when it felt like time was enough, but then again, this was back when anything sub-three hours would get you the infinite rocket launcher, regardless of how many First Aid Sprays you used.

3. Resident Evil 1, REmake: High fidelity version of RE1’s gentle strings remind you of simpler times when your worst fears were zombies resurrecting into scarier, faster zombies with claws. What we wouldn’t give to go back to those days, and maybe tell ourselves not to take out so much student debt. Listening to this sends a pulse of gentle energy through my shoulder blades that makes me think “relaxation,” though I’m not sure my body understands the meaning of the word. A respite in trying eras, there is no association with the tension of shaving 15 minutes off your time to be competitive. “Safe Heaven,” they call it; a theme for a place that is not our own, but should be.

2. Resident Evil 1, Director’s Cut: Wow I did not expect music box chimes and tones stirs something ancestral in my blood. I’ve played the Director’s Cut far more times than the original RE1 and this is like coming home to a big house where I enjoyed an idyllic childhood, but I now know every box is filled with the creepy knife doll from Onimusha. Though these senations are foreign to me, something about them inspires a thirst for a homeland I never knew.

1. Resident Evil Code Veronica: The absolute chillest. In life, paths may wind, but the ultimate  The strings are tickling your spine. You’re so relaxed you feel like oiling your ponytail, and you could even take a nap in Steve Burnside’s arms without reflexively gagging. When you hear this, you are at peace, and the world seems like a place that can be kind. Truly, the Code is Veronica.

and don’t forget to vote in our poll on whether or not we’re playing Claire A or Leon A tonight!

[stunudo]

Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth.

Buddha

Craters 4

A Criminal Minds Fan-fiction

Featuring: Genderneutral Reader and Spencer Reid

Setting: Season 10

A/N: Violence, language, and talk of dead bodies. Thank you all for reading this really dark thing I created. Bold type is the present. Italics are the future. xoxo Stu

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3

Your name: submit What is this?

Dr. Reid banged on the cell door frame, getting the cops to release him. He glanced back at you over his shoulder, his eyes calculating. In that glance you saw the man behind the genius and it filled you with the first genuine glimmer of fear you had felt since you had been taken in for questioning.

You had no where to go and nothing to do, but wait. You resigned yourself to these simple truths and laid back down on the unforgiving cot.

September 21, 2014

Jerry had finished digging, the sandy soil cleared away enough to finally get to work. It was an end of summer heat wave and he owed it to me to get this over with. I hadn’t slept in three days. I put on Memory from my mom’s old cassette soundtrack of the Broadway play Cats, the old boom box rattled with the volume. She wore her green dress from her forty year high school reunion and was wrapped in one of my grandmother’s quilts.

I let the song fade into the next and the next, watching the dirt fall over my mother’s body was a sight I will never forget. This miserable excuse for a friend had given my mother a heart attack and somehow convinced me to keep it a secret. We didn’t like cops and his play thing was still recovering from their wild weekend. I had no one else in the entire world but Jerry now. It made me sick to my stomach.

Eventually the sun went down and Jerry stopped letting me rewind the tape. He took the boom box back into the truck, leaving it in the bed with the shovels. I don’t remember him carrying me into the cab, but he must have since I woke up in my bed the next morning.

“Garcia? Tell me about Y/N’s mother.” Reid barked into the comm unit still live from the unsuccessful raid.

“Homeowner, single, mother to Y/N, uh, hello.” Garcia sputtered. “She left her job late last month because she had quote “struck it rich”. Which unless it was with a backwoods gambling operation, she did not.”

“My girl! Now tell me, did she quit in person or email?” Morgan crooned.

“Letter, like from a good, old fashioned type writer.” She replied, “The bus company scanned it into their records.”

“Right in line with the timeline.” Hotch muttered, pointing at the dates on the cork board.

“She died?!” JJ guessed.

“Okay, but who killed her?” Rossi prodded.

“Y/N or the unsub?” Callahan thought aloud.

“Hotch, what if this is the trigger?” Reid finally spoke up.

“Death of the mother would be a traumatic enough event to push even someone as mild mannered as Y/N over the edge.”

“But we profiled Swanson as our unsub.” Morgan challenged.

“But why?” Hotch replied. “Because he had ties to all of the victims?”

“He also has a history of violence against women.” Callahan spat.

“But what if it wasn’t Jerry?” Hotch countered.

“Jerry isn’t the unsub. He’s the motive.” Reid finished.

September 22, 2014

I was in the kitchen just before dusk, filling the sink for dishes. We hadn’t been very good on chores over the weekend. The girl wouldn’t shut up about how sorry she was about my mom.

“That’s terrible, man. Like, I can’t get her face out of my mind. You know?” She rambled, scratching at her arms as she came down from the days long binge. I never really listened to Jerry’s girls talk for very long. Usually they didn’t like me or I zoned out long enough for them to leave me alone. This one was not getting the hint.

“Do you know when Jer’ll be back? I don’t really want to walk home.” Her voice was part whine and part cough. I ignored her and made myself a sandwich, I had an hour before I had to start my shift. If I had ever had a pet, I would have known what to do with the chick. But, I hadn’t, and my nerves were exposed wires after my mom, had, you know.

I listened to the second hand click away and counted. It was nearly seventy three seconds after her head went into the soapy water that her body stopped fighting me. But I didn’t count all the way up, I did rows of twenties. As her body fell soaking on to the floor, the purest sense of ease filled me. And I began to laugh at the little rag doll on the floor.

Hotch, Morgan and JJ took the rooms on the ground floor as Reid, Callahan and Rossi scaled the stairs for the second floor motel rooms. The team and the locals surrounded the motel, bar and small shed, the house belonging to the unsub’s mother had turned up neither the missing Gerald Swanson or any other victims. They had yet to locate the body of the mother as well.

The dusty inn had many vacancies, leaving the BAU to invade only a handful of innocent people’s rooms. Morgan and Hotch had cleared the last room facing the parking lot when JJ froze.

“Do you hear that?” The blonde paused and the frantic rattling of metal against a hard surface met her fellow agents’ ears.

Derek was the first one into the attached bathroom. Hanging in the shower stall by his wrists was Jerry Swanson. His stocking feet were half soaked with a combination of his own blood and the water dripping from the shower head. His mouth had been duct taped shut.

“Hold on man, we got you.” Derek lifted up the lanky man to ease the strain on his shoulder sockets while JJ cut through the leather belt holding him in place.

Hotch hung back and called paramedics, considering how out of the way this place was, he worried it may be too late. Reid, Rossi and Callahan met at the crime scene, searching the room for evidence to use against Y/N. Reid found it on the bedside table, in small print across the generic motel notepad was a single sentence, over and over again.

“I will not be a bad friend anymore.”

“It looks like Y/N went from one to infinity on the disciplinary scale with Jerry here.” Rossi pointed out over Reid’s shoulder.

“The penmanship slips, I wonder how much blood he lost before he was given the task.” Spencer Reid said.

September 30, 2014

Jerry hadn’t quite been himself lately and I knew it was my fault. I didn’t like seeing my friend down. But I didn’t say anything, I just mulled it over and over in my head. Jerry and I never really talked about feelings, just making sure we had a good time.

I just had to get Jerry to have some fun and he would be able to forget about how bad he felt about what happened to my mom. At least that is what I guessed was bothering him. You don’t just kill your best friend’s mom and forget about it, like that. Right?

Walking home the next morning I heard a car approach behind me, which was odd as they usually barely slow down and ease around. I ignored it, thinking it got turned around on the way out of town.

“Y/N?” A woman’s voice called to me. “Do you want a ride?”

It was Jerry’s ex Traci, I wasn’t raised to be rude. I glanced over my shoulder at her leaning out of the driver’s side window and nodded. I slipped into the passenger seat of her salt rusted station wagon and put on the seat belt.

“Thanks, Trace.”

“We found Jerry, Y/N.”

“Is he alright?” You asked honestly, his punishment wasn’t supposed to last this long.

“He’s in intensive care at the Central Hospital in Dixon.” Dr. Reid’s voice was flat. He remained defiantly outside of the holding cell. You approached him steadily, looking around to the surrounding officers in intimidation stances.

“That’s a good hospital, thank you.”

“You’re thanking me?” Dr. Reid shook his head. “You’re the one that put him in there.”

“Honestly, no. Jerry got himself in trouble and you folks kept me from releasing him from his punishment, yesterday.”

“Tell me about the girls, Y/N.”

“What about them?” You asked, leaning into the bars, waiting for the questions to flow freely now that you were freed from the sidestepping.

“You said you watched Jerry have fun with the girls. When did it go from watching to killing, Y/N?”

“Dr. Reid, Jerry had lots of girls over to the house. I’m not quite sure which ones you think that I killed.”

“Y/N, where’s the last girl? Traci Stevens, where is she?”

“Now, Traci I do know, cuz she was nice to me. Gave me a ride home couple a weeks ago. Even before that she was nice, she kicked Jerry out so he could come home to me.”

“Where is she, Y/N?”

“I sure don’t know, Doc-tor Reid.” His lips told you he was not amused, but his eyes looked impressed.

“Jerry will tell us everything we need to know, Y/N.”

You wanted to believe he was bluffing, but there was nothing he needed from you anymore. Nothing besides where to find Traci. It was a simple thing, but after years of giving, you were done. You shrugged, “If Jerry talks there is nothing I can do about it. I could never depend on him anyhow.”

October 14, 2014

Jerry had picked Traci over me, in the end. He wouldn’t hurt her, even though he usually liked roughing up his lovers a bit. Making them scream, that’s why he found me such a challenge. Nothing he ever did to me got me to wail like those girls he would play with. Traci was kept in the basement since the day she gave me the ride home, for the most part Jerry was grateful.

But it was just because I hadn’t killed her, too, like the girl he was fucking when he killed my mom. I didn’t want to kill Traci, I wanted to keep Jerry home. If I had something he loved, he would be happy staying with me. I had taken away some of his used toys, but at least he still had her. Traci wasn’t supposed to die, but she must have gotten sick or something cuz she pleaded for medicine or some whisky the afternoon before I left for work.

Walking in the next morning I found Jerry strung out and Traci on the couch, he had cut her ties and let her out of her space in the corner.

“Jerry, what did you do?” I snapped my fingers trying to get him to focus.

“She’s gone. Traci’s gone. Just let me die.” He moaned.

It took me nearly all day to deal with the body, driving back to the woods where we camped during the Cranberry Festival two summers ago. I hated driving, but I kept the speed limit and Jerry told me how to get there. He was slobbering and sobbing the entire time. And I had to stop myself from yelling at him that it was all his fault. He was good to me when we buried my mom, so I tried.

After Traci was gone for good, we drove back home. I had to get cleaned up before work and Jerry had finally started to sleep off the drugs. It was just before bar close when Jerry stormed into the motel office yelling like a wild man.

“Y/N, you sick fuck. How could you?! You were supposed to be my friend.” He shoved me as I sat in the office chair, leaning half his body across the front desk. I grabbed his arm and bent it behind his back, slamming his head on to the piles of assorted fliers for local businesses.

“Eleven years you’ve been dragging me along like a lost puppy, Jerry. Whose the sick fuck? Huh? Cuz I’m finally seeing this friendship needs serious help.”

*

“Now, you’re going to hang out for awhile and think about what you’ve done.” I explained to Jerry, patting his face gently before his head lolled back to the side. I closed the door to the motel room tightly behind me and headed back to the office. I had another two hours of my shift left and still needed to clear the closing trash from the bar. The fall air had turned chilly and I hopped from foot to foot to keep warm.

“Y/N Y/L/N?” A stern voice called from the parking lot, an SUV and a squad car had appeared out of thin air.

July 15, 2016

I had started from the beginning, laying my whole life out for the woman before me. She wore a sleek suit, but nothing distracting. Her eyes were blank, I couldn’t read her thoughts one way or another. I stopped trying pretty quick. I traced patterns on the table as I explained about my dad and how tough school was. She asked more questions when I got to Jerry.

I didn’t want to talk about the bodies, but she asked round about questions and they always turned back up. After lunch and cafeteria duty, I was shown back to the visitation room. She was still here, her notebook and voice recorder set aside.

“Y/N? Do you want to figure out why you did these things?”

“Ma’am?” I was confused. “Aren’t you here to research people like me?”

“Yes, but if I can give you some insight into why you are the way you are. Wouldn’t that be beneficial?”

I stared at the darker skin under her eyes, “You trying to get me to share some untold secret to help your project? Get all the recognition? You aint the first Doctor-Fed I’ve met.”

“So it says in your file, Dr. Spencer Reid interviewed you extensively before locating the remaining bodies and Gerald Swanson that day, almost two years ago.”

“Yeah? Bet it says a lot of things that seem more important than they really are.”

“Y/N, did you know that I work with the BAU? I work with Dr. Reid on a regular basis.”

This lady was messing with me, but I decided it didn’t hurt to test the waters. “Oh yeah? How’s little old Reid these days?”

Her eyes unfocused, “What I mean to say, Y/N. Is that if you cooperate, I’ll see if Dr. Reid will accompany me on my next visit.”

“You know what Dr. Lewis? I suddenly remember there WAS a fifth girl.”

“I thought so. What can you tell me about her?”

Feds, eating up anything you shoved in front of them. Maybe Dr. Reid wasn’t rid of me yet.

@dontshootmespence @starbucksreid @jodiewhitters @cherry-loves-fanfic @ficrecswithcassie @criminal-navy-writings @ultrarebelheart @sapphicpage

[77live]

i got ttagged by @homosexualhufflepuff thänks u

1. LAST TEXT SENT: "yeah” to my mom 2. LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: black white and uhhhh like crimson maybe? 3. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP TODAY: at about noon 4.WHAT WERE YOU DOING LAST NIGHT AT MIDNIGHT: probably sleeping lmao 5. NAME SOMETHING YOU CANT WAIT FOR: summer, its may but its like still snowing sometimes  6. LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOTHER: last night before she went to bed 7. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU CHANGE ABOUT YOUR LIFE: i wish i wasnt so fucking anxious in social situations 8. WHATS GETTING ON YOUR NERVS RN: i dont think ive eaten since yesterday morning so im feeling a bit shitty because of that 9. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: uhhhhhh i dont even know lmao 10. FAVORITE TV SHOW: twin peaks definitely but i dont really have the energy for tv shows 11. FIRST BEST FRIEND: this one guy who i bonded with over zelda when we were like 11, i miss him 12. LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: slowdive - souvlaki 13. 3 FEARS: deep water, social situations, situations in general lmao 14. 4 TURN ON’S: a music taste that matches mine, c o l l a r b o n e s, glasses, being artistic 15. 4 TURN OFF’S: closed mindedness, being an asshole in general? idk 16. SEXUAL ORIENTATION: sex or gender doesnt really matter a whole lot to me 17. MY SENIOR QUOTE IN MY YEARBOOK: this is like an american thing and im not american 18. FIRST THING I NOTICE IN A NEW PERSON: uuuuuuuhhhhhhh no idea sorry 19. SHOE SIZE: 42 20. EYE COLOR: no idea like dark greyish maybe 21. HAIR COLOR: dirty blond/brown 22. FAVORITE CLOTHING ITEM: no idea  23. WHAT COLOR UNDERWEAR I’M WEARING RIGHT NOW: black 24. ULTIMATE BIAS: idk what this means  25. ULTIMATE BIAS GROUP: or this im sorry aaaaaa 26. FAVORITE SEASON: summer 27. HOW MUCH TIME I SPENT ON DESIGNING MY BLOG PAGE: no fucking clue i dont even know what it looks like tbh 28. THE REASON I JOINED TUMBLR: i dont remember at all 29. LAST BOOK I READ: peter hooks memoir about joy division  30. DO I EVER GET “GOOD MORNING” OR “GOODNIGHT” TEXTS?: yeah kind of 31. WHEN DID I LAST HOLD HANDS?: yesterday morning i think :))) 32. HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE ME TO GET READY IN THE MORNING?: 20 or so minutes, i want to sleep for as long as possible so ive gotten pretty good at getting ready fast 33. HAVE I SHAVED MY LEGS IN THE PAST 3 DAYS?: no but maybe i should, they look pretty bad 34. WHERE AM I RIGHT NOW?: my bed  35. DO I LIKE MUSIC LOUD OR LOW: idk relatively low i think 36. 3 THINGS I LOVE: art, sleeping, my friends 37. HOW I FEEL RIGHT NOW: hungry and im a bit shaky  38. SOMETHING I REALLY, REALLY WANT: just happiness i guess whatever thats gonna take 39. 3 THINGS THAT UPSET ME: the state the world is in, idk what else im really bad at this sorry 40. WHAT I FIND ATTRACTIVE IN OTHER PEOPLE: i already answered this in the question about turn ons pretty much but collarbones and hands are hot 41. 3 HABITS I HAVE: checking my phone way too often, procrastinating a lot, being way too shy 42. SOMETHING I FANTASIZE ABOUT: like the future and stuff? life in general 43. MY OTPs: never been into that stuff so none 44. SOMETHING IM TALENTED AT: lmao i have no fucking clue 45. THE BLOG I GIVE MOST NOTES TO: idk 46. THE LAST PERSON THAT RE-BLOGGED FROM ME: idk 47. DO I SMOKE/DRINK?: very occasionally 48. MY FAVORITE FOOD: idk i really like eating but i dont really have a favorite food 49. MY FAVORITE DESSERT: same here i really like desserts but i dont have a favorite 50. WHAT I DID YESTERDAY: nothing too special 51. NUMBER OF KIDS I WANT: idk i would have to learn to take care of myself first lmao 52. NUMBER OF SIBLINGS I HAVE: just one 53. SOMETHING THATS CONSTANTLY ON MY MIND: school and other things that are stressing me out 54. LAST PERSON I MESSAGED ON TUMBLR: @homosexualhufflepuff 55. CAN I DRIVE: no cars are scary 56. WHAT STATE OR PART OF THE WORLD DO I LIVE IN: sweden but im finnish  57. AM I IN SCHOOL?: yeAH 58. DO I GET GROSSED OUT EASILY?: yeah i think so 59. SOMEWHERE I WOULD LIKE TO VISIT FOR A WEEK: maybe like japan or some country in europe 60. I’LL LOVE YOU IF…: if u listen to the same music as me 61. LAST SHOW I BINGE-WATCHED: stranger things probably 62. WHAT WORDS UPSET ME THE MOST: i dont really get annoyed by specific words but i dont like when people use really big words for no reason other than trying to seem like theyre better than everyone else 63. WHAT WORDS MAKE ME FEEL THE BEST ABOUT MYSELF: jsut compliments in general 64. A WISH THAT I’VE WISHED FOR REPEATEDLY ON 11:11: dont think ive done that more than like once and i dont remember what i wished for 65. WHO I WOULD SWITCH LIVES WITH FOR A DAY: i dont think i would want to do that 66. MY FAVORITE ICE CREAM: maybe mint or lemon flavor?? idk i like most ice creams 67. ALLERGIES: cats and pollen 68. SEXIEST PERSON TO COME TO YOUR MIND IMMEDIATELY: david bowie lol 69. MY CHILDHOOD CAREER CHOICE: i dont remember  70. ONE OF MY INSECURITIES: lol theres way too many to pick just one 71. HOW MANY BLOGS AM I FOLLOWING: 69 lmao 72. HOW MANY TABS/DIFFERENT WINDOWS ATM: just 4 rn 73. COKE OR PEPSI: i rarely drink soda so i dont even remember what pepsi tastes like so maybe pepsi to see what its like 74. TEA OR COFFEE: coffee, baby 75. MOVIE OR BOOK: if this is between a book and its movie adaptation then the book any day of the week, otherwise it really depends  76. A SENSE I WOULD BE WILLING TO LOSE: none of them?? i feel like this question was worded a bit poorly 77. QUOTE I LIVE BY: idk im just winging it 78. TYPE OF ACCESSORIES I WEAR THE MOST: i dont really wear any accessories ever 79. LAST AWKWARD SITUATION I FOUND MYSELF IN: uhhhh it wasnt that awkward but a couple days ago i just didnt really know waht to do or say bc i was meeting a lot of new people and im very bad at that kind of stuff 80. WHAT TIME IS IT RIGHT NOW: 1 pm 81. A SONG THAT’S MADE ME CRY: theres so many but the last song that made me cry would b 4th of july by sufjan stevens 82: FIRST SONG I EVER SANG AT KARAOKE: idk sorry 

this was honestly a bit of a chore so im not gonna tag anyone but if u see this and think it looks fun do it!!!!!

[purplesurveys]

1030

1. What did you do on the last nice weather day? I’m guessing ‘nice’ here universally means sunny and fair, even though that isn’t my weather of choice. But that said, yesterday I just stayed indoors and caught up on rest by binge-watching Friends, which I haven’t done in a while. I also ordered another embroidery kit online since my first kit, which I had mostly used as a trial since I’ve never done one before, has since run out of the given floss.

2. What do you love the most about your work? I work in an agency, so I’m not forced to do PR under just one company which I think would get boring for me pretty quickly. With the nature of my work, it’s fun working with many different brands/companies at one time because I get to be exposed to and learn about different industries, and I’m also challenged to come up with campaigns that would best fit the different groups that we work with which is always fun. Also, PR is a great way to keep up with the trends and always remain hip because I always know about upcoming campaigns or promos before they’re even unveiled to the public, lol.

3. What do you think about what is going on in the world today? I think wealthy people and big corporations are a crucial, if not the main, root of the world’s problems and it’s frustrating that the task of mitigating those issues is always delegated to everyone below them.

4. What is your favorite way to work out? By not doing so, hahaha.

5. What motivates you? I don’t know if anything has been lately. I’ve been taking life slowly and easily these days and I’m allowing myself to just go through the motions as I digest all these big adjustments currently going on in my life. For now I’m not putting any pressure on myself to be motivated to do anything big. I’m still a little overwhelmed with everything as it is.

...where’s #6?

7. What is something people do that drives you crazy? When people need something from you so they message you, but do unnecessary small talk before asking for a favor. The fact that they need my help does not bother me; the fact that they are only talking to me because they need something from me does not bother me. It’s the small talk that irks me. I’ll be ready to help anybody at any time and it doesn’t matter how long it’s been since we’ve spoken – but just go ahead and ask for the damn thing and don’t waste my time trying to sound like you care about what’s going on in my life.

8. What are some things on your bucket list? Go to Wrestlemania, travel with my own funds, have my own place, have kids.

9. What are some of your deal breakers in a relationship? Do I even have any? Gab dropped so many red flags in our relationship that should have been dealbreakers and my dumb, ever-forgiving ass always saw past them. I think the thing with me is that I think I have a list of dealbreakers, but when actually confronted with them I’m too afraid to speak out about it, so I just forgive and forget and eventually they just stop being dealbreakers. I have to work on that.

10. What do you never leave your house without? My top three are phone, keys, wallet. And of course, as a given – a face mask and face shield.

11. What was your most memorable vacation? Sagada and Singapore/Malaysia, since that was my first trip abroad.

12. Do you have any phobias? Needles and fire.

13. What is your favorite ethnic food? Indian, Thai, Indonesian, and Korean. 14. I love Italian/Thai etc. Would you like to go to my favorite place sometime? I love both, though I like Thai a tad bit more. And yessss, I’m always open to anyone’s recommendations so long as it’s got something to do with food.

15. What TV shows have you binged lately? I’ve been rewatching Friends again and I’m in between seasons 5–7, which I believe to be the show’s peak. Currently, I’m several episodes away from the Ross/Elizabeth storyline and Chandler’s proposal.

16. Send me a funny meme that you shared recently. I haven’t been active on social media, so I haven’t seen any new memes lately. I hate missing out.

17. What do you hate about technology? This is more nitpickiness on my end than anything else, but battery power. I hate being constantly cautious over my gadget running out of power or dying on me especially when I’m out. I often find myself wishing for technology to evolve to the point that we won’t need batteries or to charge stuff anymore, which idek if it’s even possible haha.

18. What sites do you find yourself visiting the most? YouTube, by a mile.

19. Do you have any favorite apps? Again, YouTube. I also like going through Reddit at the end of the day.

20. What is the best part of your day? Any point I don’t find myself feeling miserable.

21. What time period would you like to visit the most, if you could time travel? 70′s punk/rock scene, maybe? < Ooh, this is a good one. Also, late 90s Attitude Era-era WWF/E. And whenever Pompeii was around.

22. What scents do you really enjoy? (a certain flower, cut grass, fireplace, perfume) Bakeries, a newly-cleaned hotel room, coffee shops.

23. What is something that you are terrible at? Giving and following directions, drawing, and cooking.

24. What are some favorites on your playlist right now? Because I mentioned The Japanese House on a survey last night, I am ALL over Saw You In A Dream again. Seriously, god-tier. One of my favorites ever. Outside of that, haven’t been listening to music lately because I’m still sad; but I might find myself back on Spotify soon. As much as I haven’t been tuning into music, I do miss it.

25. What comedy movie is your favorite? Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. Also, a bit of a garbage choice but White Chicks.

26. Have you ever meditated? No. I don’t think I have the patience/required attention span for it.

27. What is your dream job? I wanted to be in PR. I currently work at an agency which is my dream for now so yay for me achieving that, but like I’ve said before it would be such a dream come true if I can come work for WWE, my dream company, in any capacity. Getting to work for their in-house PR team would be the perfect icing on the cake.

28. What comes to mind when you think of a great moment in your life? Being in a relationship, and how much I miss that feeling. Now that I’ve experienced both singlehood and having an SO, I can definitely decide that I don’t particularly enjoy being by myself.

29. What do you miss the most about college? The independence I learned to gain. My campus was such a freeing environment and it allowed me to grow so much, to wear whatever I want, to join whatever protest or rally was going on, to meet new people, to hear different perspectives from my classmates. I miss being there.

30. Whenever you text it makes me smile! ???

31. What are you planning this weekend? My weekend is nearly over, actually...for the remaining 10 hours and 20 minutes of it, I willllll probably just watch a bunch of wrestling and maybe find something to watch on Netflix just so that I have something interesting to share for the weekly check-in tomorrow with the team.

32. Who is your favorite band? Paramore, but you knew that already.

33. How do you like to spend your free time? If I manage to find a few free minutes while at work, I gobble that shit up by lying in bed and finding a video to watch. On weekends I like doing embroidery, taking surveys, maybe even find a black hole of articles to read on Wikipedia. I’m also looking forward to playing video games once I’ve finally bought the ones I’ve been eyeing to get.

34. What do you like about springtime? I don’t know. I can’t relate, we don’t have that season.

35. Is your personality similar to anyone in your family? I’m most similar with my mom, but I share traits with my dad as well.

36. How have you handled having to stay in? It was sucky at first, but after eight months you kinda get used to it and just make the most out of things you can do only at home.

37. Are you able to work at home? Yeah, we’re all on a WFH set-up right now.

38. How would your friends describe you? The most popular opinion would probably be ‘shy.’

39. Did you ever take a really big risk? Sure.

40. What do you want to be known or remembered for? Anything but negatively.

[stunudo]

Sin, guilt, neurosis; they are one and the same, the fruit of the tree of knowledge.

Henry Miller

That Got Away: A Criminal Minds Fan-fiction: Part 5

Inspiration: Katy Perry’s Song “The One That Got Away”

Rating: Mature      Setting: Season 4       Featuring: Dr. Spencer Reid x Reader

A/N: Thank you all for sticking around as the story progresses! Buckle your seat belts, it isn’t over yet… xoxo Stu (I don’t own any of the images/ characters/ lyrics) Warnings: A spot of sexy times, angst, it is rather long.

Part 1    Part 2    Part 3    Part 4

Derek was ready to get on with the case, the world moved so much more efficiently during a work week. He was out the door heading toward the elevators with thoughts of free breakfast when he spotted a manila envelope outside of Reid’s door. The large man bent down, noticing it was completely blank, not wanting to mess with potential evidence, he knocked on his teammate’s door.

There was a complete minute of silence before he knocked again, louder and longer. He didn’t think Reid was up and had missed the delivery, so he decided to try calling him. He could hear the ring on Spencer’s phone through the quiet hall. JJ appeared, heading down the corridor of BAU rooms from the elevators, coffee in hand. Her blue eyes watched Morgan as he waited for the doctor to pick up his phone already.

You were pleased to find out that Spencer had acquired more than one romp’s worth of protection. You woke up with his morning wood nestled against your backside and you couldn’t think of a good reason for that to go to waste, “When in Rome” and all that. So you began with gentle kisses, rolling Spencer on to his back, he wasn’t quite awake yet, his eyes pleasantly closed. His bedhead endearing as you reached passed his face for one of the remaining foil packages. The tearing sound was what got his attention from dreamland.

He mumbled something incoherently. “What’s that Sir-sir?” You whispered through a giggle. His brown eyes glanced at you sideways, which was hard to do because you were looking straight into them.

“Be nice,” Spencer teased, rubbing his eyes. “I’m already pretty sore, mon cher.” His croaking morning voice and sweet names made you want to be very nice, indeed. You slowly maneuvered atop the FBI agent’s long body. After securing the barrier, you licked your finger tips, preparing your waking body for the next round. Spencer moaned as he saw your fingers in your mouth, you blushed at his blatant lust.

As you slid down on to Spencer, your body shivered. You bent over to kiss his gasping mouth, slowing rocking into him. The first knock was easily ignored, it could have been for any of the surrounding rooms. Spencer’s large palms on your breasts, turned your attention back to the moment. His eyes flew open at the second assault on the door. You tilted your head, hoping your soulful look would distract him again. Spencer rose to a seated position, you adjusted, holding his head in your arms, he nuzzled your cleavage. His arms felt so secure around you, it was back to just the two of you…

*B-rrrrring*

Derek heard the line open, but Reid was quiet, though his breathing was labored. “Reid? Everything okay in there?” Derek’s voice was concerned, the kid was not that heavy of a sleeper.

”Um, yeah, Morgan,” Spencer creaked out. “What’s up, I’m not late am I?”

”No, kid, you’re not late,” Derek reassured, “But you’ve got a package out here and I don’t want to touch it in case it is evidence. Open up, I know you have some evidence bags in your stuff.” JJ stood, leaning against the door frame, sipping the end of her coffee.

”Morgan, I can’t exactly do that at the moment. Can’t you grab some from Hotch?”

”What the hell kid?!” Morgan was getting frustrated now. “Just open the damn door, clearly this is involving you and probably Dr. Y/L/N.” Suddenly, Derek heard another voice in the background, a clearly softer voice.

JJ alarmed at the quick escalation, “Morgan, what is going on?” Derek shook his head, trying to clear the images out of his mind. His enlightened eyes, caught JJ’s attention. “I think Y/N is in there,” Derek began to whisper, “In bed. With Reid.” JJ choked on her coffee.

”Hey, kid, I can hear that you are occupied, but be professional here.” Derek spoke back into the phone. “JJ and I will wait until you get some pants on.” He couldn’t keep the laughter out of his voice as he ended the call.

You decided to hide in embarrassment. But what you actually did was give the agents some time to investigate the weird envelope by taking a shower. Spencer had scooped all of your clothes up and tossed them into the bathroom, frantically he threw on clean clothes, and kissed you quickly as you scurried towards the shower. You could hear Agent Morgan’s deep chuckle as Spencer opened the door. A pleasant woman’s voice also entered and you wondered if it was Agent Prentiss, the multi-lingual agent or JJ Spencer’s best friend who had just had a baby.

You showered in a blur, and attempted to redress, though the obviousness of yesterday’s clothes would be nearly a scarlet letter on your chest. You sighed, you were adults, this was nothing to be ashamed about. The fact that you didn’t have underwear to put on was only pertinent to yourself. You kept your hair in the towel twist, because you didn’t have anything to fix it with. You assumed Spencer had a decent amount of hair care products with the length he kept his, but none were left out for you to utilize. Huffing up your chest, you swallowed for courage and opened the door to the BAU.

Three sets of concentrating eyes spun on you as the door opened. You sheepishly waved at Agent Morgan, a smirk crawling up his face. Spencer’s eyes went to the ceiling as Derek purred, “Good Morning, Dr. Y/L/N.” You turned to the new agent, “JJ, right?” You gathered by the tiny blonde woman before you.

“Yes! Hi, “ JJ leaned forward to take your handshake. “It is nice to meet you, finally.” JJ turned to glance at Spencer, her face showing signs of approval. You weren’t sure if it was for Spencer’s talking her up or for you being in his bed. Shyly, you sit down on the bed that was still made.

“So, what did you find?” You ask Spencer, casually. His face a twist of concern. “Is that alright? Can I ask or is that breaking some rule?” You continue, not quite rambling yet.

“Well, we haven’t completed the analysis of the document or the delivery system,” Spencer began before Agent Morgan interrupted him.

“It’s addressed to the both of you.” The African American agent’s blank face scared you more than the fact that someone else knew where you were last night. Why was he trying to be appear so calm?

“Just what does it say?” Your eyes darting at everyone, landing on Spencer’s furrowed brow. “Sir… Spencer? Will you just read it to me?” You exhale, annoyed at the building tension.

Spencer cleared his throat, holding up the sheet of paper housed in a glorified Ziploc bag.

“Oh how young lovers find

Distractions and delusions

Your fates have been rebound

From stone pillar to this inn

We seek your minds not sins

Until victory, un-found”

Spencer’s careful cadence did the awful poem more justice than it deserved. Your eyes had unfocused in concentration until the fourth line. Stone pillar? Where were they coming from with this? Spencer’s eyes met yours as he finished the last line: a veiled threat. His dark eyes were burning for you to catch up, but you didn’t see the connection.

“What, Spencer?” You challenged, “What are you getting at with that face?”

“Y/N and I attended an event at her family’s home,” Spencer began, clearing his throat as he explained that night. “Back when I was still a graduate student. She was 18, I was 17…”

“You two were more than casual acquaintances,” JJ nodded, trying to get to the point.

“Wait a second!” Morgan followed, “Was it a re-dedication ceremony? Yeah, Garcia found a picture of you, your dad and Reid from, uh, ‘99?”

You nodded blankly, watching Spencer try not to meet your eye. “I took off your glasses!” You remembered hazily.

Spencer agreed with a dejected nod, “And I was trying to hide you from sight, so you couldn’t see past me.”

You look at Agent Morgan, “I think I know who sent this, but I have no idea who they are.”

I was June and you were my Johnny Cash Never one without the other, we made a pact Sometimes when I miss you I put those records on

Spencer’s mother’s breakdown kept him home for nearly a week. He had called and apologized to Dr. Y/L/N and Dr. Bing from the Physics department, both men were surprisingly understanding. After a year of hiding his mother’s illness from Y/N; she had found about it, in the worst possible way. The drive home that fateful night was etched into his memory, sitting in the back seat with his mother. Spencer kept silent, letting Y/N make small talk with Diana. Y/N was surprisingly calm during their public ordeal.

She had called nearly everyday since the gala debacle. Spencer couldn’t bring himself to answer the phone. The messages often went over the time allowed, the tapes scrambling as he re-listened to each of them. He knew summer was coming to a close; Y/N would pack up the Volkswagen and drive off for another year away. He didn’t know what to do, but that night Y/N made up his mind for him.

She knocked on the small apartment door just after dinner. Her outfit a perfect blend of her eclectic musical taste and her naivete, he thought, entranced by her bare arms and legs. “Can we talk?” She huffed, her arms crossed over her breasts. Spencer nodded, he was back to wearing his contacts. Y/N stood fidgeting at the doorway.

“I guess that I won’t be receiving an invitation inside?” Y/N mumbled.

“I would, Y/N/N, but I don’t want to upset my mom.” Spencer whispered, “Please understand that I want to see you.” His eyes orbs of honesty.

She nodded, a half smile on her soft mouth. Spencer was humbled that she had come to see him, despite all of the unanswered messages. “I’m still with you, you know that right?” She blurted out, her eyes twitching at her own impetuousness.

Spencer murmured in agreement, “I do, thank you.” He paused, scratching his arm. “Thank you for checking up on me, on us, even.”

She had sauntered over, taking one of his sweaty hands in her smaller ones. Her skin was cool, she placed his hand on her face, like she had during their first kiss. He instinctively closed his eyes, kissing her goodnight. And as she turned to leave she squeezed his hand, reassuringly.

“All right, first off I want Security tapes all open to our team,” Hotch was barking at the head of security of the hotel. “When one of our agents is threatened, we don’t need a warrant.” Hotch was pushing it, Agent Rossi and Agent Prentiss both knew it, sharing a glance.

The entire team had assembled in a small conference room beside the breakfast nook. You were there, uncomfortably watching the confrontation before you. Spencer had made sure you were allowed to stay, he felt that your safety depended on it. You thought he was being paranoid, but you didn’t argue since your father had just been murdered in his own home.

Spencer and Agent Morgan were on the phone with a chirping tech assistant in the corner. You wondered if she was the sultry agent’s significant other, the way they flirted shamelessly. You smiled at the thought of being able to work with someone you cared about. Academia was challenging, entangling a love life with it seemed impossible.

“Morgan,” Hotch had returned to the table where you and JJ sat quietly. The team filed into seats around the enclosed space. Spencer sat beside you, his shoe nudging your ankle reassuringly. “I want you to do cognitive interviews with both Reid and Dr. Y/L/N, but separately. This event was ten years ago, so we don’t need any interference as it is.”

“Rossi, can you and Prentiss handle the meetings with the TAs and the colleagues? We don’t want to lose out on any other breaks in the profile.”

The dark haired Emily Prentiss nodded along with the friendly Agent Rossi. He was very concerned with how you had been holding up since he had questioned you the first day you were in town. As Agent Morgan and Spencer were going to start their special interrogation, you approached the unit chief.

“Sir?” You held your head high, calm.”May I return to my room to change and make some phone calls? I need to cancel some meetings and a lunch I had set up.” The serious man eyed you wearily. 

“Of course,” Hotch agreed, “JJ will escort you back upstairs.” He nudged his communications liaison towards babysitting. The blonde woman followed you to the elevator in silence.

”I want you to tell me what you see,” Derek’s soothing voice beckoned Spencer into the past.

”I see Dr. Y/L/N. He’s in a tux, he’s laughing with Dr. James and a drunk Byron Osbourne.”

”Wait, Osbourne was there?” Derek confirmed.

”Yes, he is standing besides Olivia Madison.”

”Alright, Reid, what happens next?” Derek continued the interview.

”Y/N is there, her dress bares her back. I want to touch her, but I can’t, not here.” Derek chuckles. ”She grabs my hand, my wine spilled on the stones of the patio. She is angry with me, she drags me into the kitchen. Everyone was laughing at us.” Spencer’s voice hitched at the embarrassing memory.

Derek is keenly listening to what a teenage Reid recalls from a distinguished academic event. Teenage guys were all the same apparently. ”Alright, good, now I want you to move later on. What happens when you and Y/N were hiding by the stone pillar?”

”She tastes like pine needles.” Spencer began, “Her skin is so smooth, I just got lost. My hands were sliding down her back when the voice called.”

”Alright, Reid, whose voice was it?”

”I’m not sure, but they called me Dr. Reid.” Spencer answered.”I can’t see much without my glasses, it’s blurry and I feel a bit drunk.”

”Was it a man’s voice?” Derek probed.

”No, it was a woman, maybe a younger guy?” Spencer pondered. “I remember the color red in the blur as I spun Y/N around, trying to hide her. I didn’t want her to get in trouble.”

”Red?” Derek thought aloud. “Were they wearing red? Did they have red hair?”

”I don’t know!” Spencer was frustrated. “The next clear thing is Y/N fixing my tie. Her face is flushed, I did that. I gave her the alcohol and then felt her up in the corner. I did that?” Spencer remembered incredulously.

”Hey, now it’s okay.” Derek soothed. “I need you to go through the rest of the night now. Does red come back into sight now that your glasses are back on?”

”Nothing stands out.” Spencer pauses in thought. “There was a red headed presenter and Simon had on a red bow tie with his tux, he was very proud of it. I was asking about it as my mother called to me. Oh god, why is she here?” Spencer’s voice hitched in a panic.

”Whoa, whoa, Reid,” Derek tried to calm the other agent. “Who is Simon?”

”He was a TA like me, but in the Physics department only. He was short, round, Korean.”

”Alright, I have some things to figure out,” Derek ended the interview. “Are you good?”

Spencer squinted his eyes before opening them. He sighed, “Yeah, Morgan, I’m good.”

It was oddly comforting to see your hotel room just as you had left it. The chair tossed aside, broken from Spencer’s fall. Your stack of corrected essays littered on the desk. JJ moved slowly about the room, subtly checking for dangers. You gathered your carry-on as a brief case, your cell phone and your wallet. You went to the bathroom to tend to the mess that was your post-sex/ post- sleep/ post- shower, uncombed hair. When you came back into the main room you saw JJ fingering the unopened letter from Spencer.

“That’s nothing,” You try to explain. “It was from before. Well, it was from Saturday, but it’s not.” You sigh at your self, pinching the bridge to your nose. “It’s not from the bad guy, okay?”

JJ nodded, “I know Spencer’s handwriting, Y/N. I am certain it is not from the bad guy.” She added softly.

Just then the door to your hotel room burst from the hinges.

Part 6

“How blunt are all the arrows of thy quiver in comparison with those of guilt.” -Robert Blair

@dontshootmespence @reiding-and-writing @reidsexualwriting @criminal-minds-fanfiction @speedreiding @sparkle-dinosaur @holagubler