#bonnie gave me a sick fucking mug

[deviouslittlecreature]

Sorry babe I'm too busy having realistic dreams about the fazbear crew being there for my top surgery

[isitgintimeyet]

Road To The Aisles

AO3

Previous

So, after last week’s romantic interlude, parenthood hits with a bang!

Thanks to @mo-nighean-rouge @happytoobserve @wickedgoodbooksfor their help and support ... and to you all for reading.

Chapter 7: A Challenging Confrontation

Poor Elizabeth. My heart aches for her, for I am sure all that carping bitterness makes her wretched. I dare say it is only physical: liver perhaps, or acidity. – E. F. Benson Mapp and Lucia

Claire hurriedly gathered up her curls, still damp from the shower, and tied them in a messy bun as she made her way downstairs.

She found Jamie slumped at the kitchen table, large mug of coffee in one hand. The other hand was rhythmically bouncing William’s baby seat, positioned in the centre of the table. He stopped momentarily to run his fingers through his hair. William whimpered, frustrated at the cessation of the bouncing. He kicked his legs and waved his arms wildly, screwing up his face in preparation for a loud display of his general dissatisfaction.

Jamie sighed and resumed the bouncing, temporarily placating the baby.

Claire kissed them both. “Morning, loves.”

Jamie growled. “Is it? I canna say it’s been the best night round here. William’s been awfa fractious. He wouldna settle in his cot. In the end I gave up and brought him down here. I dinna ken how people manage with this every night, or with more than one bairn. What time is it?”

Claire glanced at the kitchen clock, which was clearly visible. “Seven thirty.”

Jamie yawned. “I gave him some Calpol about an hour ago. Do ye think he’s too hot? Or is he too cold? Doctor him, Sassenach.”

Claire pressed her lips to William’s forehead. “His temperature’s fine, Jamie. He’s got a bit of a cold. The Calpol will have regulated his temperature. And he’s getting upset because when he tries to self soothe with his thumb, he can’t breathe. Hang on.”

She briefly left the kitchen before returning with a small box which she handed to Jamie. “It’s a syringe bulb. Squeeze it, put it carefully up William’s nostril, then release. The mucus will be sucked into the bulb. Empty it into a tissue, rinse and repeat.”

“That sounds gross Sassenach. Can ye no’ do it? Ye’re a-“

“Do not say woman, James Fraser.”

“Actually, I was going tae say doctor,” Jamie replied curtly.

“Jamie, you’ll be fine. You know, contrary to popular belief, some doctors don’t actually like dealing with stuff like this. Man up. This is only the first of many gross things you will have to do as a parent. Get used to it. Plenty of fluids, try and go for a walk, give him some fresh air and you nap when he does.”

“If he does,” Jamie complained in an undertone.

Claire ignored his last comment and headed for the door. “And I will see you later. I’ve got two complex primary hip replacements waiting for me at the hospital.”

Jamie yawned again.

“Ye dinna have tae sound so happy about it,” he called as she disappeared from view.

**************

Claire gingerly poked her head around the living room door.

“How is everybody?”

Jamie raised his head slightly from his prone position on the sofa. William lay dozing on his chest, his breathing punctuated by a series of sniffs and snores.

“I’m no’ going tae lie. It’s no’ been the best day, Sassenach. We’ve watched ‘Homes Under the Hammer,’ ‘Bargain Hunt’ and two Columbo films. I tried tae go fer a walk, but he wouldna settle in his pram and I couldna get that baby harness thingie on me. Last feed he sicked it back up on me, but he wouldna let me put him down to change ma shirt. I’m bursting fer a piss but he’s like a limpet on me. And…”

Jamie winced and moved his hand over William’s, loosening the baby’s grasp. “... he’s just started pulling at ma chest hair. And he’s got an awfa fierce grip.”

Claire looked down at Jamie. He did look worn out, she admitted to herself, but no worse than plenty of new parents she had seen. His hair was standing on end, the lack of sleep was clear from the purple smudges under his eyes, and there was an undeniable odour of baby sick around him. Parenthood had taken its toll today.

“Why don’t you go and freshen up? I’ll look after William.”

“Are ye sure? Ye’ll have had a hard day too, cutting intae people.”

“I’m positive.” Claire sniffed. “And have a shower too.”

Jamie slowly sat up. William, now being cruelly deprived of his comfortable pillow, opened his eyes, screwed up his face and, after a couple of preliminary moans, began to cry very loudly.

“Here, let me have him.”

Jamie made no argument as Claire took the baby from him and rocked gently from side to side. The crying immediately stopped. From over her shoulder, William watched his father get up and move to the door. A half hearted cry caused Jamie to hesitate.

“Go on,” Claire urged. “He’s fine. He’s just playing you. He knows who the soft touch is around here. Don’t you, William?  You think your daddy is here just for your amusement.”

William snorted as if in agreement before contentedly biting at Claire’s shoulder.

“By the way, Geneva said she would pick William up in a bit. Save me having tae drive over there.”

“Well, well,” Claire whispered in William’s ear as Jamie left the room. “Looks like Mummy is actually trying to be helpful.”

*********

Claire held William -- apparently intent on trying to fit the whole of his elephant rattle into his mouth -- in one arm, while she checked her messages on her phone with her free hand. She noticed several missed calls from Geillis.

“What’s up with Auntie G, then, hey?” She muttered against William’s head.

As she began to text her friend, the doorbell rang.

“Shi- shoot! Mummy’s a bit early and Da’s not here.”

Claire lifted William and carried him to the door.

“Will ye let me the fuck in?” Geillis’s muffled voice came through as Claire, surprised to hear her friend’s voice, struggled to balance William while unlocking the door.

“Well, William, that’s a very naughty word from your Auntie G.” Claire joked as she kissed Geillis’s proffered cheek.

“Dinna be joking and putting on that special baby voice.” Geillis was clearly in no mood for levity. “I need help, Claire. I need tae talk tae ye. Can Jamie no’ mind his bairn?”

“Ouch, G. Too much.” Claire chided gently.

“Sorry.” Geillis moved into the living room. “I’m in a bit of a state, tae be honest.”

Claire secured William in his baby seat, ignoring his whimper of protest. “Won’t work with me matey, I’m not your Da. Take it out on your elephant.”

She shook the rattle encouragingly and turned to Geillis. “What is it? Didn’t you have lunch today with Dougal? Is there something the matter with him?”

Geillis gave a fake laugh. “Aye, ye could say that. He wants us tae have a baby together. I mean, a baby… Christ… can ye imagine me wi’ a bairn?”

Geillis looked down at William and closed her eyes. “Fer God’s sake, he’s already got two daughters wi’ his ex. How many more bairns does he need? And they’re seventeen and fifteen now… and he wants tae do that all again?”

Claire took Geillis’s hands in hers. “G, this is not an easy situation. You need to think carefully about this. Any choice you make has got to be right for you… it’s a huge decision, having a baby.” Claire paused, thinking about the irony of her last statement.  “Or at least it should be.”

“But what if it’s a deal breaker? What if Dougal doesn’t want tae carry on if I dinna have a bairn? Should I have a bairn fer him?”

“A baby won’t heal a relationship, G. You know that. You’ve got to both want it. You can’t be having a baby just because you’re afraid of losing him. And if you have a baby, will you be resentful of Dougal putting you in that position?”

Geillis sat quietly for a moment, nervously pulling at her cuticles. The silence was broken by William, fed up with being ignored, who emitted a loud screech. Now confident he had Claire’s attention, he resumed sucking his rattle.

The sound pulled Geillis out of her reverie. “Oh, fer fuck’s sake. I must sound like Geneva… thinking about having a bairn tae keep a man. What is happening tae me?”

“G, listen to me. There is no way you are like Geneva. For a start you are in a serious relationship with Dougal, not a one night thing. And it’s Dougal who wants a baby. Geneva was the one who wanted the baby, not Jamie. And Geneva tricked and lied to try to get what she wanted. So, unless Dougal starts sticking pins into condoms, you’re safe."

Geillis blanched then sniffed and pulled a tissue out from her cleavage. Blowing her nose, she began to talk. “Aye, I guess ye’re right --“

The doorbell interrupted Geillis.

“Oh no,” Claire exclaimed. “That’ll be Geneva now… and Jamie’s still in the shower.”

“So, is this some kind of Beetlejuice situation? Ye say her name three times and she appears?”

Lifting William out of his chair, Claire made her way into the hall.

“Jamie,” she shouted up the stairs. “Geneva’s here.”

A muffled voice responded. “I’ll be right down. Give me two minutes.”

Geneva was her usual polished self, Claire noted as she stood on the doorstep, having obviously benefitted from a good night’s babyless sleep.

With a formal “good afternoon” Geneva stepped into the hall, took William from Claire and cuddled him tightly.

“Oh, Mummy missed you so much,” she whispered.

“Come into the living room. Jamie’s just having a quick shower,” Claire explained. “It’s been a tough day for him… with William feeling a bit under the weather.”

“Glad he’s experiencing the reality of fatherhood,” Geneva responded as Claire led the way in.

“This is my friend, Geillis, and this is-“ Claire made the introductions.

Geneva interrupted. “Hello, I’m Geneva… I’m the mother of Jamie’s son.”

“Aye, I ken who ye are… and I’m the best friend of Jamie's fiancée. We were just having a wee chat about the wedding and the plans. I dinna ken, there’s something tae be said for summer weddings, but then an autumn one would be grand or a Christmas wedding would be awfa bonny with snow on the ground. What do ye think? So many decisions. Still whichever Claire and Jamie choose, it’s bound tae be special, I’m sure. And as maid of honour I’m here tae make it all run smoothly. Have ye seen the ring? Jamie must have taken a while choosing that…”

Geillis seemed to be unstoppable in her monologue about planning the wedding and the engagement, not allowing Geneva any way into the conversation. Claire could see Geneva’s face grow darker as Geillis’s onslaught continued.

“Now, the dress… weel…”

At that moment, Jamie stepped into the room. Geneva immediately interrupted Geillis.

“Jamie, have you got all William’s stuff? Please take it to the car. And tell me all about his illness… Geillis, sorry I must dash.”

“Och, that’s ok. It was grand tae meet ye, Genevieve.”

Claire blew William a kiss as Geneva followed Jamie outside.

“That was fun!” Geillis remarked to Claire. “I was verra nice tae her, do ye no’ think?”

“Classic passive aggressive, G.”

“Weel, she deserved it. She pissed me off the way she introduced herself.” Geillis glanced at her watch. “Actually I must go now too.”

“Ok, well take care,” Claire wrapped her arms around her friend and gave her a big hug. “Please think about this carefully, and talk to Dougal. You need to tell him what you’re feeling.”

“Aye, ye’re right. Love ye, Claire.”

“Love you too,” Claire burst out laughing. “Oh goodness, I just realised. You called her Genevieve. She’ll hate that.”

Geillis gave a big swooping bow. “My work here is done. Bye.”

*****************

Jamie lay in bed and watched Claire, at the dressing table, rubbing moisturiser into her face.

“Sassenach, I’m so tired. How do parents do this day after day? At least I ken I’ve a few days tae recover now.”

“You do it because you have to… and because they may be smelly, annoying, demanding little creatures but you love them… and they’re worth it.”

“Aye,” Jamie smiled. “He’s worth it right enough. Now, Sassenach, am I worth it?  Come and give yer man a cuddle.”

Claire slipped under the covers and snuggled close to Jamie, her head rested on his shoulder, her hand on his chest, fingers automatically stroking the reddish gold curls there.

“Can I ask ye something, Sassenach?”

Claire nodded.

“I ken ye want bairns, but we’ve never really said when or how many. So?”

Claire pulled away to look at his face. “I don’t know really… two I guess. That’s usual nowadays, isn’t it?”

“Aye, two would be grand...or three mebbe.”

“Let’s see.”

“But when do ye want tae try, Sassenach?”

“Not for a while. William’s so small. Do you really want two babies in nappies?”

“Nah, ye’re right. No’ just yet, but promise me Sassenach, can we keep up with the practice in the meantime?”

Claire kissed him firmly on the lips.

“Aye,” she mimicked. “I promise.”