#btw this has not been proofread + i wrote it bcs i was bored right after hot sauce

[haveateadude]

bleak horizons

summary *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ yeah, okay. maybe you're sad.

warnings *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ depression, self-harm, mommy issues (dw there's A LOT of fluff and cuddles and hugging and it all ends up alright) this is just talked about but it can still be triggering!!!!! pls take care of yourselves!!!!!!!! my dms are open :)

author notes *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ wasn't planning on posting this but i love validation. also, this is not like cannon ellie i guess?? i did a really bad characterization bc i used this as a vent and i just wanted comfort lmao. hope this still makes y'all feel seen or fucking something. btw this first part is really boring hehe, i wrote this when i was in a rush and in a train and i was tired and sad so i don't mind if it flops lol

i hate this so much idk why i'm posting this as my first pots. aghh. here u go ig. don't hate on me. bye.

(not proofread, sorry abt that)

pt1 — pt2 — pt3

you look so out of it

pull it together

we can love you

forever and ever

I've recently moved in with Ellie after weeks of looking for someone to move in.

I had checked other apartments, but this was the one that didn't smell like there was a corpse under my feet, hidden from the light beneath the floor and it didn't look like it was haunted by ghosts. The walls weren't chipping away, also, so that was a plus. There's no denying that getting used to living with someone else was difficult, but it was the only alternative to live away from my parents. Not to mention I had developed feelings for Ellie—she's beautiful, with those eyes and auburn hair, and her tattoos just make her look fucking badass.

After a few weeks, I settled in with her: we both have a routine, and established unspoken rules, and now it's comfortable living with her.

Tonight was a lovely night—I had already finished everything I had to do, and I didn't have an exam until next week, probably—until I got a call from my mother. I know I can't run away from this one. She always threatens to unroll me from college and take me home when I don't answer her calls. And I know she's capable of doing so.

“Hello?” I said as I went out to the kitchen, to take a glass of water.

“You know, most people say something sweet when they answer their mother.”

I roll my eyes, even if she can't see me. It was just a fucking hello.

“What happened, Mom?” I ask, not wanting to fight.

She takes a second to answer, “Well—I was looking at some resources and there are a lot near your area…”

She takes a second to answer, “Well—I was looking at some resources and there are a lot near your area…”

“Resources about what?”

“Therapy. Conversion therapy.”

It takes all of myself not to gasp, or cry. I don't know. I hear Ellie going out of her room, and walking towards the kitchen. I don't care if she's here; I haven't been caring about anything these past few days.

“Okay,” Is all you say. I don't know how to answer, or what to do. I leave the glass on the aisle with trembling hands.

“That's all you have to say?”

“I—I don't know what you want me to say.”

“‘Thank you’, maybe?” I stay quiet, I don't want to thank her, I don't want her to speak to me ever again. “You could also get therapy for, you know…”

“For what, mother?”

“The cutting. Your scars—I always thought they looked repulsive. No one is going to lov—”

I hung up before she could say anything else. I hate her. I hate my mother. I can't even believe she's a mother, let alone mine. I suddenly feel the need to hurt, and I hate to admit it, but my mother has always been right about the way they look—so I just shut my eyes and try to breathe. It always helps—deep breathing, that is. I have to remind myself that I'm clean. I've been clean for months. Maybe even a year, I lost count.

“You okay?”

Ellie's voice almost makes me flinch, already having forgotten about her. I open my eyes as she walks over to me and lays her elbows on the aisle, while I rest my back on the counter behind her.

I look at her, with a knot in my throat, “I'm fine.”

“Your mother…” She makes a pause, short enough to not make me go crazy, “Is she, like, a pain in the ass?”

I chuckle at that as I cross my arms, “Yeah.”

“If it gets too bad, you can talk to me. I don't mind. And my dad has some contacts, we can maybe scare your mother away.”

“It's okay,” I tell her with a smile. “I can manage.”

“I know,” She smiles, and I can feel my heart fluttering in my chest.

Before I say anything I regret, I go to your room with my door open—a technique I've acquired to avoid hurting myself.

I sit at my desk and look up conversion therapy first, I want to know what this is all about—I know that it's harmful to people in the community, that it leaves you screwed and fucked up. I don't like what pops up on my screen, so I close the tab and go to another one—where I search for therapy. The real one.

I went to a lot of therapy sessions, but my mother was always behind them, so I don't know if it ever was effective. I like this one a lot better. It should be helpful. It will help, I know that for a fact.

I'm having dinner with Ellie, which we normally do—today we ordered, since we were hungry and it always takes a little while to prep a meal—when I think to ask her about the topic.

“Do you know any therapy center?” I ask her. “Or the number of a therapist? Whatever.”

If she's curious, she doesn't show it. She stops chewing on her food, then looks at me; then continues to chew, and after she swallows she speaks, “Sure, I have some friends that go to the same therapist, so it's completely trustworthy, I guess. I can ask for the number.”

I wipe my mouth with the napkin on my side, “Yeah, that'd be alright.”

Ellie takes a sip from her cup and then looks at me, “You okay, though…?”

“I'm fine, just—you know, making sure everything's okay.”

She nods, “Got it—I was just asking.”

After my first therapy session, I ended up tired. My therapist—which feels weird to say out loud and even in my head—is a nice lady in her thirties who looks like a hippie.

I've realized I tend to lie a lot—I didn't talk about self-harm or my mother. Or anything else, really. Just about the movie Speak, and then almost cried when talking about the weather.

So, “Yeah, it went well,” is my answer when Ellie asks how it went, sitting in her car. She picked me up since I had taken my car to maintenance.

“Okay, then,” she says once the car engine starts. She connects her phone to Bluetooth, and we listen to music for a while. Ellie places her hand on my knee when I start bouncing my leg, which sends shivers down my spine and gives my brain something to think of that isn't any of my shit. “Do you want to go eat something?”

“Sure,” I accept. Her thumb makes little circles on my knee. I wonder if she knows what she's doing, her eyes are still fixated on the road. My heart does the flutter thing that it did a few days back again, and my core heats up.

She doesn't want you, I try to convince myself. She's your friend, she doesn't want you. She will fall in love with you, not your brain nor your scars, and when she finds out about the way you think she'll leave.

When we arrived at the restaurant, we ordered a plate together, since we always share and the food here comes in big sizes that we wouldn't finish if we ate it separately.

When we arrive at the restaurant, we order a plate together, since we always share and the food here comes in big sizes that we won't finish if we ate it separately.

“So, how's work?” I ask when we're waiting for our food.

“It's going well, I guess.”

“You guess?”

"I just hate my boss."

I furrow my eyebrows, “do you want to talk about it?”

“It's fine, he just sucks. But well, Jesse is postulating to—you know, be a boss; that fucker.”

I chuckle, “Well, I like Jesse.” I soon realize what I said, and my cheeks go red. “Not in a, uh, romantic way or anything. You know. Fuck. He's just nice.”

“Just nice?”

“I like you better than him,” I blurt out, which only adds to my embarrassment.

Oh, oh.

I like Ellie.

Fuck, yeah. You do.

Who am I kidding, I knew I did. From the start—from the first time she looked at me, for the first time touched my hand and spoke to me; for the first time she played guitar for me and made dinner because she knew how tired I was.

Ellie is flushed. I can tell.

“Oh, do you?” She asks with a grin.

The waitress comes with our food, and leaves the plate. I look at her, she looks at me at Ellie and then leaves.

I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear and lay my elbow on the table, with my chin propped up in my hand.

“What if I do?”

She bites her lip, looks at mine and then at the food, “The food's getting cold.”

What the fuck. What the actual fuck. Did that actually happen, or was it my imagination? Holy shit. Shit! Fucking fuck.

It leaves me thinking, but my thoughts leave when I hear her laughter after I crack a joke.

We take the stairs up the apartment, and we laugh all the way up. We just laugh and laugh and laugh because she said something and now I'm almost falling to the floor from how much my stomach hurts.

“Stop,” I say when we get to our apartment door. I keep laughing because Ellie's laughing too and she can't open the door. “My stomach hurts.”

She looks at me and laughs. Idiot. I laugh, too.

“Hey!” We hear our neighbor say. “Quiet down!”

“We're sorry!” I exclaim back, as he closes his door.

Ellie giggles, “You're so fucking dumb, I'm not sorry at all.”

“Shut up,” I say.

“Oh, make me.”

And then—oh, god—and then, and then she looks at me as the curvature of my lips goes down, and then I kiss her.

I kissed her. I fucking did. Me, not her—not Ellie's brave and confident ass, but mine. The butterfly in my chest flutters harder when she kisses back. She puts both of her hands on my waist and deepens the kiss, while my hand moves from her cheeks to her neck, then finds its way to her torso.

Ellie manages to open the door without breaking the kiss, and then she shuts the door with her foot.

“We should—” I speak between kisses. “Ellie—couch.”

“Yeah, okay. Okay.”

Our tongues fight, but our souls mend and I find my way to her in every sense. 

[jentlemahae]

hi! I am here to inquire about the plot of dream verse 💓

under the cut bcs i got carried away

EP 1: Dive Into You

It is no secret that 20-year-olf Park Jisung was born in luck. He was the full package – tall, handsome, smart, good-hearted, skilled at sports, and extremely rich. His family had found wealth 25 years before, when his grandfather (Park Haru) started the hot sauce business that would become the most successful hot sauce business in South Korea – DREAM FLAVOR. No one knew exactly how he had done it, as it seemed to have happened in the blink of an eye – people always asked him, but all he would do was wink and say, ‘I just had a spark of good luck’. But no one knew how true that was.

Jisung always looked up to his grandfather, and trusted every single word that came out of his mouth. His step-father (Jae-yi), however, had a much different opinion on the old man. He thought Haru was a total nut case, always nagging him obsessing over that damn candle. Truth be told, he did sort of have a point. Haru had a candle he was extremely secretive about, which he kept in a locked room beside his bedroom. You know, the “normal” place where people keep candles. As he was growing up, he always told Jisung that the candle was actually far more precious than it seemed, and that he should never let it blow out. A bunch of popicocks, as his father would say, but Jisung never forgot it.

He still didn’t forget it on that cold day of early May – that is, the day his grandfather died. Some people say death isn’t lonely, but that’s exactly how Jisung felt. Haru was not just his grandpa – he was his role model, his teacher, and most of all, his friend. On his will, he decidedto give Jisung a key to the candle’s room with a note that said, ‘I’m giving my spark of good luck to you and ONLY you. Use it well’. Jisung was torn because he wanted to trust that the last words his grandpa said to him were meaningful, but he couldn’t help but think, ‘What’s this old nut saying?’. Nonetheless, he took the key and went into the ominous room, with nothing but hope as his company. The candle was burning in the center of the dark windowless room, untouched and unsettling. It was just a normal candle you could find at a local market, yet something about the flame made it impossible to look away. Unsure of what to do, he decided to just leave and go home to try to forget about the whole thing. Yet, the trembling flame kept haunting his dreams for the entire night.

The next day, Jisung’s father decided it was time to move into Haru’s house and turn it upside down, with no care to the fact that the body of Haru was almost not even cold yet. He wanted to clean each room, but he couldn’t get into the candle room. Jisung was unsure of what to do – he did think his grandfather was bananas, but he also didn’t want to disrespect the only legacy he had left him. So, he refused to give up the key, and instead offered to clean the room himself. After dusting every inch of the area, he opened the door to let some air in. But as the wind was roaring outside, a sudden violent breeze came through the door and blew the candle out. Jisung rushed over and then ran to get a box of matches, to try to light it up as quickly as possible. However, no match seemed to work, as the fire appeared to refuse to burn again. With a wretched feeling in his gut, he immediately left and went back home to take a nap, trying to tell himself that it was nothing big. Boy, was he wrong…

When Jisung woke up from his nap, the sight that welcomed him was not what he expected – a young boy with blue hair and a green hoodie was sitting on the floor across from his bed. ‘Hi, I’m Mark’, he said – simple words that scared Jisung to his very bones. Raddled and very confused, Jisung decided to call his 5 friends – Renjun, Jeno, Haechan, Jaemin, and Chenle – and asked them to come over, hoping that together they would be able to make sense of the situation. But alas, they did not. As they watched Mark ravaging Jisung’s fridge as if he hadn’t eaten in a decade, they tried to come up with a game plan.

However, quick-tempered Haechan quickly lost his patience, and told Mark either he left on his own, or they were going to call the police. At which Mark looked at Jisung in disbelief and asked him if his grandfather hadn’t told him anything about him. Utterly confused, the boy shook his head, and so Mark told his story to the 6 googly-eyed friends…

Mark was 500-year-old spirit, born under the Joseon dynasty. Once he died, a witch bounded him to the candle – whenever someone lit it, Mark would bring good fortune and money to their family as long as the flame was burning. If it was blown out, the fortune would stop and Mark could wander the earth freely until someone new lighted it again.

The 6 friends exchanged a look and knew they were all thinking the same thing – they had to light that candle up once again.

(end of ep 1, now I’m gonna go more quickly omg this is so long I’m genuinely sorry)

EP 2: Rainbow

Mark overhears a convo between the others and becomes aware of the fact that they want to put him back inside the candle, but obviously he doesn’t want to. So he makes a pact with them to have 3 days of freedom, and he plans on stealing the candle in the meantime. He wants to go to the beach, so the 7 of them go on a road trip.

The 7 of them do some bonding and Mark tells them more of this story. He was born in a family of slaves and had grown up seeing all the injustices inflicted upon his people by the hands of the hierarchs. So, one day he decided to take matters into his own hands and began retaliating, by stealing from the royals to help his family. But his anger for revenge couldn’t stop at just stealing – he wanted the blood of those who had hurt his people. So, when he died, the witch put him there as a punishment for the murders.

They find out he’s a nice guy so they don’t want to put him back into the candle, as they realize he should have a chance to live too. So Mark tells them there is a way he can be out but still have access to his powers – they need the help of the witch who put him there. Obviously she’s dead by now but her power ran through her family, so she must have a descendant who is able to help them.

EP 3: Diggity

The witch who put him there was called Man Wol Lee and, as they find out, was an ancestor of Haechan. He doesn’t have magic but his twin sister – Hae-soo – does. So they go to her and try their best to convince her (Mark is the only one who manages to get through to her). In the meantime – Haru’s business (who is now in the hands of Jisung’s father) begins to go into trouble + Mark is staying as Jisung’s house (as he’s usually by himself anyway since his parents both work a lot) so the two have a lot of talks and stuff (e.g. Mark explains that when the candle is lit, he is stuck in a limbo called the Dreamverse – i.e. a place stuck between life and death where he has to face his own worst nightmares + tells him how he had met Haru). Anyways, they get Hae-soo to try something witchy so she channels Man Wol’s spirit with a spell book they found (and that Mark translated since he knew old Korean). They find out Mark and Man Wol used to be lovers (uh) in the old times, and she was the one who killed him and then forced him into the candle because she wanted to stop his lust for blood. She tells them the only way to free Mark is to bind someone else to the candle, to replace him.

EP 4: Irreplaceable

(+ Mark starts being mean to Hae-soo bcs he’s mad at Man Wol) They conclude the person they lock up should be a bad person + they don’t wanna kill them so they should find someone who justdied. So they go to the hospital but don’t find anyone (un)worthy enough (they know bcs Mark see what someone has been like while they were alive bcs of a spirit thingy).

*some shit happens*

They discover the candle got stolen. They search for a while, but then Mark disappears – someone must have lighted the candle again.

EP 5: Be There For You

Hae-soo does a locator spell so they’re able to find the candle, and discover that it’s now in possession of Vincenzo Cassano, one of the biggest mafia bosses in South Korea (he had heard of the candle’s powers and he wanted to use it). The 6 boys go to him to try to blow the candle out and free Mark, but they get caught and are taken hostage (they are taken to a storage area near Vincenzo’s house). Thankfully, Hae-soo followed them and blew the candle out, so Mark goes to free them but when he’s about to kill Vincenzo to protect Hae-soo, he can’t bcs spirits can’t kill the people who used to “own” them, so Jisung throws himself in the middle and gets shot instead. To stop him from dying, Hae-soo puts him in the candle.

EP 6: All Night Long

They realize Vincenzo has fled and has taken the candle. So there are two “realities” in the episode.

On one hand, there’s Jisung who is in the Dreamverse. There he sees a world exactly like his true reality BUT everything goes wrong – his grandfather is alive but tells him he’s a disappointment + his mother dies at Jisung’s hands + Jeno, Jaemin, Renjun, Chenle and Haechan force him to kill Hae-soo + they then try to kill him so he has to run away.

*BACKSTORY: Jisung’s father died before he was born + then his mother re-married but then she dies as well when he was 16 + Jisung never got along with Jae-yi and even less after the death of his mom

On the other hand, the others are trying to figure out how to bring Jisung back. Hae-soo and Mark contact Man Wol to ask her more information – she tells them they can enter Dreamverse (with her help ofc) and can help Jisung find an “exit”, which Mark couldn’t use since Man Wol made it impossible for him to access to ensure he would not escape. Jisung can use it bcs the prison world was not created for him. Jaemin, Jeno, Renjun, Haechan and Chenle go to Vincenzo’s house to try to find something to track him down (since the locator spell doesn’t work). But when they go there they find Vincenzo’s dead body and no trace of the candle.

EP 7: Rocket

Two “realities” again.

Mark and Hae-soo go in Dreamverseto rescue Jisung (they find him first and the two mend fences). They convince him they’re real (bcs he’s kinda going bananas and can’t distinguish the Dreamversefrom reality) + they take him to the exit which is a door located in the middle of Dreamverse – the door is the door to the ‘candle’s room’ at Haru’s house. They go there (struggling bcs the others try to stop them + it takes a lot of energy for Hae-soo to keep them inside so she’s weak) and manage to get out (yay!).

Jaemin, Jeno, Renjun, Haechan and Chenle look at the CCTV (Haechan hacks into it) but they can’t see who killed Vincenzo (bcs there’s no cameras in that room) BUT there’s one in the garage so they can see the car of the person who killed him à the car plate! They recognize it so they know who’s the owner. They go back to Hae-soo’s to find them all out + tell them who is the killer (and has the candle) – Jisung’s step-father, Jae-yi.

EP 8: Hot Sauce

Jisung is out BUT he’s not human – he’s a spirit, both alive and dead at the same time (so he can’t feel touch and stuff, that’s important for later). + Jisung has a talk with Hae-soo to thank him for saving her life and apologize for putting him in that situation. He replies that he’s the one who’s thankful bcs she saved his life. They kiss <3 but Jisung can’t feel anything so :(

So Jisung, Jaemin, Jeno, Renjun, Haechan and Chenle go to Jae-yi’s (which is actually Haru’s) house and try to find evidence of him being linked to Vincenzo – Jisung still doesn’t wanna believe it, but they find evidence. Mark and Hae-soo contact Man Wol and explain to her the situation and ask if they can put Jisung’s father in there without killing him. She tells them there’s a way to do with just a drop of his blood + explains the spell to Hae-soo + tells Mark she forgives him. So they go face Jisung’s step-father: there’s a fight and yadiyadiyada but they manage to put him inside so yay!!!

The “owner” of the candle is now Jisung. He decides to use the fortune to continue Haru’s hot sauce business – he puts it in a box (the one from the life is still going on mv). Mark is a human now so he can go anywhere but decides to stay in Seoul and experience life as a normal college student. Jisung and Hae-soo kiss again <3

EP 9: Life Is Still Going On (BONUS EPISODE)

It’s 7 years into the future. Everyone meets again at a dinner thrown by Jisung.

Jisung is the CEO of DREAM FLAVOR and the company has grown even more + he’s engaged to Hae-soo who is doing her medical residency to become a surgeon + Haechan and Chenle are now starting a tech company together (about keeping you safe from hackers etc) + Jaemin is a surgical resident as well + Jeno is now a soccer player in the national team + Mark is getting his second Bachelor’s

They eat and chat + Jisung tells Haechan and Chenle he’s giving them the candle bcs they need the luck more since they’re starting a new business. So he blows it out + the episode ends with Haechan lighting it again.

-FIN-

Thanks for reading omg this was fun :DDD