#buffy gets therapized

[girl4music]

“Love is seeing someone. Love is putting their needs before your wants. Love is being willing to sacrifice something because you care more about them than about yourself. And if the person you’re with isn’t acting that way, it’s not love. At least not yet. Like could it evolve into that? Sometimes. But even then it only evolves into that if you establish kind of like what the guidelines are, right? What the barriers are, what the boundaries are, is the word I’m looking for. We often confuse attachment for love, or attraction for love or even affection. Spike started with attraction, and then attachment, and that’s, we see that as passion, but that’s, attraction and attachment often lead to possessive behaviour, controlling behaviour, abusive behaviour. Affection is a step closer to love. Affection is tenderness and kindness and consideration, but it only blossoms into love when there is no expectation of anything in return. When you love somebody, you want their happiness. You may want that happiness to be with you, but even more than that, you want their happiness, even if it’s not. And how you can tell that this is actual love in his case, which is confusing to him, he’s never experienced this before, is that he is putting himself second. Now that can be taken to an extreme. Obviously, you can put yourself second over and over and over again in a relationship and just get walked on, but in a healthy relationship, it goes both ways. That is the difference in my mind between love and imitation love, what we often confuse with love.”

This is one of the best scenes in the whole show. Certainly the best scene in Season 7. But more than just the scene itself - for what follows after it. I’ve mentioned this before. But you have every other coupling of the episode having sex but Spike and Buffy just holding each other on the bed in an abandoned house. Very reminiscent of the abandoned house they destroyed to bits in their sex scene in ‘Smashed’. And putting those two scenes in juxtaposition with each other would reveal the striking differences between them. One is actual connection, the other is possession. It all about what one can get out of the other. But the ‘Touched’ scene as part of a montage where everyone else but them is having sex shows just how much it’s not about that anymore.

Aside from Riley, Spike is the only man to still be there in the morning when Buffy wakes up to face Caleb. And aside from Riley, Spike is the only man to tell Buffy that she’s a hell of a woman. But only when possession and obsession has left the narrative.

There was only ever two guys that truly loved Buffy for all that she was. The problem was one always put himself second and the other never did - until now. Unfortunately the other guy never stuck around long enough to learn how to. Sorry to Bangel shippers.

[diaryofateenageslayer]

Watch "Buffy Gets Therapized | Selfless Love" on YouTube

Love this analysis of Buffy and Spike's relationship from an unbiased therapist's pov 😊❤

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Wednesday, January 24

SPIKE: I won't have you feeding me like a child, Dru. ANGELUS: Why not? She already bathes you, carries you around and changes you like a child. DRUSILLA: Why, Angel. Where have you been? The sun is almost up, and it can be so hurtful. We were worried. SPIKE: No, we weren't. DRUSILLA: You must forgive Spike. He's just a bit testy tonight. Doesn't get out much anymore. ANGELUS: Well, maybe next time I'll bring you with me, Spike. Might be handy to have you around if I ever need a really good parking space.

~~BtVS 2x17 “Passion”~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Wounded (Angel, Buffy, PG) by badly_knitted

My Secret Obsession (Angel/Spike, M) by Pinkperson

Untitled Giles miniseries, Chapter 4 (Giles/reader, Wonder Woman xover, unrated) by iobsessoverfictionalmen

[Chaptered Fiction]

The End of Destiny, Chapter 2/10 (Angel/Cordelia, T) by ConstantCommentTea

Her Old Fashioned Boy, Chapter 20/? (Giles/Jenny, T) by Bobbie23

Dawn Rising, Chapter 41/? (Buffy, LOTR xover, T) by Luna_delCielo

Sunnydale Serenade, Chapter 7/? (Ensemble, T) by TheRealJeanGenie

[French language] Les deux Phénix, Chapter 8/? (Buffy/Faith, M) by FridayQueen

Blasphemy, Chapter 2/? (Buffy/Spike, T) by wickedrum

Love Ridden, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by scratchmeout

Pack My Box with Five Dozen Liquor Jugs, Chapter 24 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by honeygirl51885

Beg, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Maxineeden

A Waxy Gent Chuckled Over My Fab Jazzy Quips, Chapter 24 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by violettathepiratequeen

Amara Time, Chapter 16 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Joan963z

Anonymous , Chapters 1-2 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Dynamite

A Little Poet in Her Monster, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, R) by Desicat

Dusk Rising, Chapter 28 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by HappyWhenItRains

A Breath is But a Soundless Whisper, Chapter 16 (Buffy/Spike, 18+) by Blackoberst

The Prodigal Boyfriend, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, 18+) by myrabeth

Love Ridden, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by scratchmeout

Clean Slate, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by hulettwyo

Coming Through, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by hulettwyo

It's Easy Time, Until It's Not, Chapter 15 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by hulettwyo

Pack My Box with Five Dozen Liquor Jugs, Chapter 24 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by honeygirl51885

A Waxy Gent Chuckled Over My Fab Jazzy Quips, Chapter 24 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by violettathepiratequeen

Other, Chapter 6 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Grief Counseling

Stomping on butterflies, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, T) by Blackoberst

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: uh. more lesbian bangel (Buffy/Angel, worksafe) by genericaces

Artwork: Buffy in her dungarees from “School Hard” (worksafe) by madeleinelovescolours

Artwork: a little Doyle for you all (worksafe) by mekanikaltrifle

Artwork: i do really like faith as a character, so hopefully i’ll be drawing her more in the future (Faith, worksafe) by genericaces

Gifset: [misc scenes with on-screen text] (Buffy/Spike, worksafe) by andremichaux

Artwork: boom comics i see your therapized spander and i raise you this (worksafe) by genericaces

Playlist: my Tara playlist!!!! by lesbianwithchainsaws

Artwork: «The Writing On The Wall» by gorgeous HollyDB (ao3) (Buffy/Spike, worksafe)) by flyora

Artwork: WTF gay little monkey that’s been all over my dashboard (Ethan Rayne, worksafe) by yarboyandy

[Reviews & Recaps]

ReWatch: Buffy the Vampire Slayer - S7, E1 - 2 by kimannebb

ReWatch: Buffy the Vampire Slayer - S7, E3 - 5 by kimannebb

ReWatch: Buffy the Vampire Slayer - S7, E13 - 14 by kimannebb

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Witch, S01E03 by ravenya003

[BtVS series review] My general thoughts so far after rewatching it by Luppercus

PODCAST: HELLMOUTH HOMOS: Graduation Day parts 1 & 2 by Fear Queers

PODCAST: Episode 47: Doppelgangland (w/ Chelsea Jensen) by Gym Was Cancelled

[Community Announcements]

[February Fangfest] Here are your guidelines for how to submit your work. by februaryfangfest

[Fandom Discussions]

One of the many things that bugs me about Angel season 4 (besides the f*cking obvious) by vampandvisiongirl

I’m not saying that Angel has a type but by oncemorewithqueering-tv

[ask by streussal] Buffy/Faith for the ship meme answered by isagrimorie

[Poll] Would you be interested in participating in a Spangel (Spike/Angel from the Buffyverse) fic marathon? by reallyreal-madeingold

can we talk about the fact that spike has no game, he’s just hot?? by voices-not-echoes, raisedbythetv89

About Spuffy & Souls, Part One - Yes, Souless Vampires Can Love by hello-nichya-here

Cordelia having literally no friends except Wes and Angel by svngriche

in my mind a huge internal struggle of buffy’s is trying to always make sure she deserves the pedestal that she is put on by giftedeath

In 2024 I’m fully rejecting the “Buffy’s friends don’t understand her/don’t deserve her by herinsectreflection

I don’t think I’ll ever not be deeply depressed by the way so many people on here talk about Joyce Summers by coraniaid

Almost 20 years since the last time Angel & Cordelia Chase graced our screens by vampandvisiongirl

Orpheus: Faith's Sacrifice continued by Bop

Wesley & Slayer Obedience - Deference by NoShip, multiple posters

What happened to Dark Willow when she reappeared in the comics and also in the Boom comics? by Kristine

What If: Xander Went To College? by nightshade

Is Giles Correct About Forgiveness? by NoShip, multiple posters

Interpreting the last line/scene of 3.15 Loyalty by Stoney, multiple posters

I love Chao Ahn but that was not cool of the showrunners to make her a one-note joke. by PotentialLanguage685

My Favourite Back/Origin Story by Electrical_Big_906

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

CONVENTION: Tom Lenk will be joining James Marsters & Charisma Carpenter at Whispers from the Hellmouth Apr 20-21! by James Marsters News

PUBLICATION: The Best Spike Episodes From Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Weekend Notes

PUBLICATION: Great Villains From Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Weekend Notes

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Join the editor team :)

[mythigal1966]

Buffy Gets Therapized | Power Speech

[girl4music]

And that’s how a legend does it!

Buffy redefined what it meant to be a Slayer. Not just for herself as the Slayer but for everyone that could potentially become a Slayer and would be able to make that choice for themselves. She never backed down to the controlling methods and unfair tactics of the Watcher’s Council. She never let herself be controlled by any authority figure. She was the law. She was the leader. That’s what being a Slayer meant. To take the reigns of a vehicle very few would choose to drive because of the immense responsibility that would be thrust upon them but still wanting the power anyway. Buffy never chose this life - this role - this responsibility. Nevertheless she took it and lived with it anyway. But only under her terms and conditions. Which is how it should be. I love the character but I find it very difficult to love her arc when much of it is written in such a way where she’s made out the martyr. The heroine that sacrificed herself, her life, her childhood and her happiness to save the world. And every time she would lose out. She would be left in severe pain and trauma or just ended up dead or depressed. It’s highly disconcerting to watch that. The one saving grace of the character’s arc was that she finally turned around and said enough was enough. That I could get behind. That I could support. That I could cheer on. Before that… I couldn’t stand it. This character was just constantly suffering all for her cause - her fate - her destiny, and a supernatural war that started long before she was ever fucking born and was basically forced to become the champion for.

“With great power comes great responsibility.” - Said Spider-Man. Another hero who unwilling became one. But also - like Buffy - decided to accept it anyway despite never choosing the life of a warrior and hero either. The super powers were just given to him. He never outright earned them. He never grafted for them. Well, of course not. He never wanted them. But if not earning them or grafting for them meant he didn’t deserve them… then he should have a choice. Ultimately both Spider-Man and Buffy took the reigns of being the human world’s hero. But it wasn’t until half way through their arcs that they accepted them.

Take away choice and there is no point to any of it. The world does not get a hero. They get a martyr. They get someone who died as a saviour for it only. For they neglect their own autonomy in the process. Controlling, abusing, manipulating, radicalising, gaslighting is what it inevitably becomes. Until the one with all the power takes full possession of it and uses it to help and inspire the innocent to save itself. To be their own warrior and hero. To have autonomy. That is ultimately what Buffy did and it’s the only real reason why her arc stands the test of time. The moment she gave this ‘power’ speech to her controllers was the moment she truly grew up.

Buffy is a legend because she made herself one.

Learn from her example.

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Friday, July 1

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Teams (Spike x Faith, Spike/Buffy, Angel & Faith, light PG-13/T) by apachefirecat

Never Weak (Spike/Drusilla, Spike/Nikki, Spike/Buffy, soft R/M) by apachefirecat

Safe (Xander/Anya, PG/K+) by apachefirecat

Limblessly in Love (Buffy/Spike, R) by bogwitch

Tingles (Buffy/Spike, T) by disco_tea

[Chaptered Fiction]

Is There Anything Else We Need to Talk About? Chapter 1-2 (Giles/Anya, Not Rated) by DWEmma. COMPLETE!

The Sin That Binds Us Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, Not Rated) by bramcrackers

Teach Me How: ReMastered Chapter 17 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by GriefCounseling101

Vacation with a vampire (Sequel to The Sphere) Chapter 5 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Coraline_Finn

144 Days Chapter 124 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by violettathepiratequeen

Valentine's Slay Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by HollyDB

Second Chances Chapter 8 (Buffy/Faith, PG-13) by Rosalind_or_Ganymede

Murder and Coffee Chapter 17 (Buffy/Willow, R) by Evil_irish_batman

Consequences and Truth (Do Over) Chapter 15 (Buffy, Joyce, Giles, PG-13) by pbjellius

Shadow Over Hellmouth Chapter 66 (Buffy/Tara, NC-17) by Tuxedo_Mark

It Makes You Look Stupid Chapter 3 (Buffy/Faith, NC-17) by aliceinwonderbra. COMPLETE!

Seven Chapter 24 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by HollyDB

Exquisite Clarity: Part 2 Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by yellowb

The Slayer and the Vampire, Chapter 38 Chapter 38 (Spike/Buffy, PG) by violettathepiratequeen

Après Chapter 16 (Spike/Buffy, NC-17) by Ninereeds

Why Are There 26 Letters? Chapter 15 (Spike/Buffy, NC-17) by Indi_Shaw

What Lies Within Chapter 12 (Spike/Buffy, NC-17) by cawthraven

All Tied Up Chapter 1 (Spike/Buffy, NC-17) by EllieRose101

Cruel Summer Chapter 1 (Spike/Buffy, R) by scratchmeout

[Images, Audio & Video]

Fanvid: I SCARE MYSELF (Buffy/Spike) by ZNellyZ

Artwork: Masterpiece X (Six Degrees of Francis Bacon) (The Master) by ForWhomtheBellEndz

Artwork: Our Lady of Perpetual Slayage (Buffy, worksafe) by ForWhomtheBellEndz

[Reviews & Recaps]

"Dead Things" and "Older and Far Away" by theowritesfiction

my rewatch of anne btvs 3x01 by spikesdru

Season 5 up to Triangle (5x11) by SemperMiror

What if the events of Seeing Red were more spread out? by ginime_

CBR.com: REVIEW: BOOM! Studios' Buffy '97 #1 by Hannah Rose

ScreenRant: Buffy '97 Returns the Vampire Slayer to Her TV Heyday in New One-Shot by JOE ANTHONY MYRICK

ScrennRant: Buffy's Replacement Slayer Is Being Corrupted By Her Power by THOMAS BACON

[Community Announcements]

Summer of Giles 2022 has arrived by il_mio_capitano

[Fandom Discussions]

One of the biggest reasons I gravitate towards Spuffy by messedupdoilies

Been having thoughts about the Cruciamentum by rachaeljurassic

Buffy never got over Angel by DinoBradshaw

S5: “Shells” Question (about Lorne's powers) by Hippies_Pointing

Video: Buffy Gets Therapized Part 2 by Mended Light

Joyce Summers Appreciation Thread (cont'd) by TamsinValencia and afanofbuffy

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

ScreenRant: Why Buffy's The Gentlemen Were Better Villains Than Every Vampire

Collider: Now Is the Right Time to Recognize 1992's 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' as a Camp Classic

James Marsters Montreal Comiccon 2022 Schedule via dontkillspike

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Friday, December 2

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Spring Fling (Angel/Buffy, G) by Taaroko

Noteworthy (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by EllieRose101

Not Microwave Safe (Angel, Wesley, G) by Taaroko

R.A.D.I.O. (Giles/Jenny, G) by HAL1500

Coffee (Faith/Willow, G) by AquaAura32

Noteworthy (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by EllieRose101

In a Billion (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by HappyWhenItRains

Spikey Claws (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Feanix88

It's a Wonderful Spike (Buffy/Spike, R) by Lady Emma

Who Needs Five Gold Rings? (Buffy/Spike, R) by Slaymesoftly

[Chaptered Fiction]

Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: Shadowed Suspicion Chapter 364 (Ensemble, Jojo's Bizarre Adventure xover, PG-13) by madimpossibledreamer

What Lies Within Chapter 19 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by cawthraven

a gravedigger’s dozen (or the people i’ve been since you left me) Chapter 6 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by taxicab12

California Dreamin' Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by LittleTayy

All That Is And All That Seems Chapter 57 (Faith/OMC, R) by MalkMcJorma

Extra Pickle Chapter 14 (Buffy/Faith, NC-17) by Alwaysandforevermylove

Make Sunnydale Whole Again (Book Two of the Reunion Trilogy) Chapter 24 (Ensemble, NC-17) by MCorey1317

Claws Chapter 3 (Jemmy, Willow, Not Rated) by mst_52, COMPLETE!

Rewriting History (working title, might change) Chapter 2 (Buffy/Faith, PG-13) by Into_the_never

Eros' Curse Chapter 8 (Buffy/Dawn, NC-17) by Deviantelfguy

A Road So Rough Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by cawthraven

Just Because It Burns Doesn’t Mean You’re Gonna Die Chapter 2 (Angel/Buffy, NC-17) by calenlily

Shadow Over Hellmouth Chapter 79 (Buffy/Tara, NC-17) by Tuxedo_Mark

think about the loveless fascination Chapter 10 (Buffy/Faith, R) by mothboys

Dawn of the Shaun Chapter 7 (Buffy, OMC, PG-13) by Buffvamporigfan

Favor Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by EllieRose101

Buffy 2.0 Chapter 10 (Tara/Willow, R) by BlueZeroZeroOne

Wonderland: Dawn of the Old Republic Chapter 11 (Dawn/OFC, Star Wars xover, PG-13) by BrennaLynn

Charmed: The Faith Chronicles Chapter 5 (Buffy/Faith, Charmed xover, PG-13) by BrennaLynn. Author also archived a number of other stories

Daisy in the Dark by Dusty Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Dusty. COMPLETE!

Le chemin de la destinée, du courage, et la force de ses convictions, les chemins de son cœur…. Le commencement Chapter 88 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Violette-Milka. In French

Unfavorable OddsChapter 10 (Buffy/Spike, R) by bookishy

Bleeding Poetry Chapter 32 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Dusty

The Road to Hell.... Chapter 30 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by All4Spike

[Images, Audio & Video]

Fanvid: something blue + comics (Buffy/Spike) by loveisntbrains

Fanvid: Take Me To Church (Buffy) by mixtapededit

[Fandom Discussions]

Giles as a father figure by dollface_96

Is there any reasonable explanation for Giles not helping Buffy more financially in s6? by lyricallyambiguous

Some thoughts as a first-time watcher by Moofthebot

Video: Buffy Gets Therapized by Mended Light

BB's Top 50 Most Memorable Scenes in The Buffyverse - Redux (Week 10) by Buffy Summers

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

ScreenRant: Buffy The Vampire Slayer: 9 Most Iconic Character Entrances, Ranked

Nicki Swift: What James Marsters From Buffy The Vampire Slayer Is Doing Today

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Tuesday, November 8

Faith: Ronnie, deadbeat. Steve, klepto. Kenny... drummer. Eventually, I just had to face up to my destiny as a loser magnet. Now it's strictly get some, get gone. You can't trust guys. Buffy: You can trust some guys. Really, I've read about them. Faith: (laughs) Yeah. So, what about you? Buffy: You mean like, me and guys me? Faith: Mm-hm. Buffy: Not much to tell these days. Faith: Yeah, but you gotta have stories. I mean, I've had my share of losers, but you... you boinked the undead. What was that like?

~~Buffy Episode #41: "Revelations"~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

House of Bad Ideas (Ensemble, T, multiple xovers) by madimpossibledreamer

Buffy and Angel vs Dracula (Buffy/Angel, T) by a2zmom

Shot Through The Heart (Buffy, G, SPN xover) by nextcompanion

The Sweetest Things (Buffy, G, SPN xover) by nextcompanion

First Words (Wesley, OC, T) by decapiitare

Peaches and Cream (Buffy/Angel, M) by a2zmom

[Chaptered Fiction]

How Love Saved the World Ch. 18 (Willow/Tara, M) by Bellalocke

Shadow Over Hellmouth Ch. 13 (Buffy/Tara, M) by Tuxedo Mark

Kaddara Hade, Chapter 12 (Buffy/Spike, E) by hostile17

Bleeding Poetry, Chapter 51 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Dusty

Odd Ducks, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, G) by violettathepiratequeen

Even Ground, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, E) by honeygirl51885

The Thing About Being on the Road, Chapter 5 (Buffy/Spike, E) by scratchmeout

Vacation with a vampire (Sequel to The Sphere) - Part 2, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Coraline

Fangs Out , Chapter 20 (Buffy/Spike, E) by Dynamite

The Road to Hell... Chapter 20 (Buffy/Spike, E) by All4Spike

Savage Beauty, Chapter 10 (Buffy/Spike, R) by Speaker-to-Customers

Compelled By Love Ch. 14 (Ensemble, M, TVD xover) by Buffyworldbuilder

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork:BTVS “Every Outfit” “Real Me” Xx () by whatshisfaceblogs

Video: the one (giles x jenny) () by Celia

[Reviews & Recaps]

Video: 'Never Leave Me' Reaction! () by Elie Moses

Buffy Rewatch 2k22 5.21 The Weight of the World by handsofabitterman

[Fandom Discussions]

Blood Ties by trepkos

when gunn admitted to fred that he didnt think he’d live this long by badrecognition

Why you should watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer after Dracula Daily by mysticalspiders

Faith Headcanons by princesstarazi

The cookie dough talk by Octavia Octavia

Would Buffy really kill Giles? by jdpm1991

How much do you hate this woman? by Bluekitty777

Quality download link for S1-7? by melodyamypond

What’s your favorite thing about Angel? by GamesterOfTriskelion

gods, S5 needed to have a storyline where Angel finds out about Seeing Red by BuffyBoltonVampFlayr

Angel- where can I watch in uk? by Redheadathearttt

i don't really like Dawn all too much, but this scene gets me every time. by luhkintwomyeyz

Throughout the entire series, who would you say let Buffy down the most? by Opening_Knowledge868

the fall of the buffyverse as a franchise by badrecognition

thinking about dru by summrsbuffy

Rewatching Buffy for the billionth time by Lozzymuss

Video: Buffy Gets Therapized | Power Speech by Mended Light

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

PUBLICATION: Buffy the Vampire Slayer's Canon Ending Gives Buffy a Surprising Job by Screen Rant

PUBLICATION: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Deserves a Mobile Game by Bleeding Cool

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