#bulletproof heart ❣

[sopebubbles]

❣seventeen: I'm with you

Bulletproof Heart

Here we have 6.5k of hurt/comfort. It's mostly comfort, the hurt is from the previous chapter. I hope you enjoy it! Don't forget to yell at me in the asks/comments.

Warnings: cw: parental neglect, allusions to self harm

It's a damn cold night// tryna figure out this life // won't you take me by the hand // take me somewhere new? [I'm with you by Avril Lavigne]

>>

They have a show tomorrow night. They have a show tomorrow--their second one--and Jungkook had broken a string and Jimin a drumstick during practice, so off to the music store they went, all four members of Bulletproof piled into Jin's small, old sedan. He made sure they all stocked up on new strings and drumsticks and even some extra drum heads for Jimin because the way that boy beats his drums can get a little violent when he gets really into it. Jin doesn't want anything to go wrong. Even though he’s doing his absolute best to act like this was all just fun and nothing bothered him for the sake of the younger guys, he’s worried about doing a good job in front of an audience. He'd felt okay after the first show a couple of weeks ago, knowing that the great thing about low expectations was that they were easy to meet. The boys hadn't done badly, and he was pleased with them, especially considering it was the first time for each of them to perform. Now the expectation would be at least that high and he hoped they would exceed it, so he'd been pushing them in practice all week. 

After the music store Jin drops Jimin off at home since he doesn't drive to school and only has access to his dad's car on weekends, when he usually goes on a bender and doesn't need it anyway. Right before getting to Jimin's house it starts to pour, and he has to make a run for it to the front door. He turns back to wave goodbye to them but they can barely see him through the sudden heavy rain. Jin pulls away and heads for their own neighborhood, the other two boys jamming almost violently to the Ramones' Blitzkrieg Bop at full volume. Jin drives carefully through the wet streets, fully conscious of his responsibility for the two boys in the car. Driving down one of the main roads, not long before the turn off to their neighborhood, Jin spots a hunched figure walking along the sidewalk. It's far past sunset and in the dark rain it's a surprise he spots them at all.

“It’s a girl,” Jungkook says as they get close. She’s not at all appropriately dressed for the weather, even if it wasn't raining. Jin slows to a stop beside her, causing her to turn toward the car instinctively, and Jungkook rolls down the passenger side window, exposing himself to the rain. The girl peers in at him and Jungkook looks back as the other two lean in to get a look at her. 

"Y/n?" Jungkook asks in confusion.

"Kookie?" she responds just as surprised, but her voice is heavy with exhaustion.

"Y/n what are you doing out here?" Jin wonders loudly against the pounding rain.

"Who cares why! Get in here!" Taehyung leans over to the other door on the side closer to her and pushes it open. "C’mon!" He yells at her. She hesitates for only half a second before climbing into Jimin's spot.

It's warm and inviting inside the car, the music's been turned down low and for a moment all of them look at her as she looks at each boy in turn. Despite the rain presenting an easy explanation for the state of her, they can clearly see the distress in her eyes, their redness and puffiness betraying the fact that she'd been crying, if not recently at least a lot earlier. The tension is broken when Jin clears his throat and turns forward once again to face the steering wheel.

"Let's get you home," he says calmly, reaching for the gear shift. 

"I don't want to go home." Jin can hear the sadness in her voice, and he nods his understanding, having anticipated that.

"I meant our home," he corrected. "Buckle up."

Y/n looks at Taehyung before turning in the other direction groping for the seat belt. Before she can grab it, Tae reaches an arm around her back and pulls her to the middle seat. Without a word he finds the center strap and wraps it around her waist, clicking it into a secure position, and then he's pulling her head against his shoulder, stroking her shivering arm with his hand. 

"I'm soaked through," Y/n mutters as a reason that he shouldn't be holding her so close. She turns her head to be able to look into his dark eyes that are already looking down at her. He shakes his head just slightly. 

"It doesn't matter." He wipes at her cheeks and her forehead to dry them with the sleeve of his hoodie. "You're freezing. You're gonna catch a cold."

"That's not how you catch a cold," she scoffs, but turns into his chest anyway and let's him wrap her in the open flap of his sweater, her own arms snaking around his body for extra warmth. Jin looks in the rear view mirror at the same time Jungkook looks over his shoulder, just in time to see Tae close his eyes and rest his head on top of Y/n's. The oldest boy’s not quite sure why he feels hot at the sight of it.  

The ride to the Kim house only lasts five minutes, but they're the most peaceful minutes she's had all week. It's quiet except for the beating of Tae's heart in her ear. The steadiness of him and the warmth he's surrounding her in is almost enough to make her fall asleep. But they arrive before she can. The rain has almost stopped but not quite, just enough that they don't have to run inside. 

"I'll see you guys tomorrow," Jungkook says softly after letting the car door fall closed.

"Night, Kook. Get some rest, yeah," Jin calls to him, just like a real older brother. 

"Kookie." Y/n reaches out a hand to grab his wrist as he passes, her voice little more than a whimper. 

"Don't worry, Y/n," he assures her, already knowing what she wants to ask--that he won't tell his parents--and he won't. His mom and hers have never gotten along, the very reason Namjoon and Y/n stay on their own instead of with them. She smiles weakly in appreciation before letting him go. Once he's gone, Y/n looks up to see Tae give her an inviting gesture, just a jerk of his head. 

Inside, under the bright overhead light of the living room, she can see the damage she's done, his shirt and sweatshirt darkened with water. 

"I got you all wet. I'm sorry." Her voice is still soft, meek, and Tae's almost shocked to see this side of her, even softer than the shy Y/n he met at the party. She hasn't said one sarcastic thing or made fun of him. He thinks of what Jungkook told him a week ago, about how sensitive she is, because even though he has no clue what could have brought this out in her, he can see she's wounded and vulnerable. 

Tae shrugs. "Gotta change for bed anyway." He turns to go to his bedroom, leaving her standing in the middle of the Kim household, directionless until Jin calls her name and waves her over to his bedroom door where he’s waiting for her. 

“You can change into these,” he tells her softly, handing her a pair of sweatpants and a long sleeve shirt he pulled from his drawers for her. Jin walks past her and leads her to the bathroom, located between his and Tae's rooms. He flips on the light and wishes it were cleaner, but it could be worse. "Towels in here. You can take a shower if you want."

"I'll just get dry and change, thanks." She glances up at him briefly with sad eyes, and he's struck by just how much he wants to see her smirk at him the way she usually does. After lingering just long enough for the silence to become awkward, Jin leaves her alone, closing the door softly behind him. 

Y/n begins to remove the wet clothes that cling to her frame. A thin zip up hoodie over a crop top and grey joggers. Her clothes are entirely inappropriate for Deagu in November, but she wasn't in her right mind when she left the house so many hours ago. It was a long time until she even felt the cold and by then she was far from home. She couldn't even say how far. She'd just walked, aimlessly in whatever direction the sidewalks would keep taking her. She'd walked by store fronts and restaurants, through parks and passed warehouses, all with her head down and her music playing loud until her Bluetooth headphones had died and then she just left them on her head because they still insulated her a bit, let her stay inside her mind, even if that was clearly the last place she needed to be. 

She couldn't be at home. Not that broken place, all the more broken when she was there alone. She hadn't slept all night, afraid to close her eyes and listen to her thoughts so instead she played with her beats until she couldn't see the screen anymore. Namjoon had opened her bedroom door in the morning to tell her it was time to go to school, and she waved a hand at him to suggest she would be leaving soon and to go on without her. She slept a couple hours when the exhaustion left her mind blank enough to fall asleep,  and then waking to all her painful thoughts, she forced herself out of the house.

Now she's tired all over again and all cried out. But at least here she feels an odd sense of safety. Why and how had the Kim brothers' home become a place of refuge for her? She isn't sure but she's thankful for it. When her clothes lay in a sopping pile on the floor she takes a towel from the cabinet Jin had indicated and pats herself dry, doing her best not to look into the mirror that only tells her lies her mind is all too willing to accept about flaws that don't exist. When her skin seems dry enough, she slips into the clothes Jin has given her and decides to take advantage of the hair dryer Tae had left plugged into the wall in his rush to leave that morning.

Jin changes in his own room and as he exits he's surprised to hear the sound of the hair dryer turn on, but he finds himself smiling, thinking how warm and comfortable she'll be when her hair's not all wet. He goes to Tae’s room to grab his wet clothes the younger boy left in a heap on the carpet before he goes to drop them in the washer along with his own. Tae is in the kitchen already, opening packages of ramyeon. He wishes they could offer her more, knowing for certain that she hasn't eaten since God-knows-when, but none of the three men who live in this house have found the time to go to the store the last few days, so he does the best he can. Seokjin busies himself with cleaning up around the kitchen and living room until he hears the hair dryer shut off. He waits a few more minutes for her to emerge before he begins to worry about her, eventually going to stand outside the door, hesitating to knock until he hears a sniff from within. 

“Y/n?” he asks, followed by a soft knock. Inside the small bathroom, she’s startled by the sudden sound, not realizing she’d gotten lost in her head again and that a few more tears had slipped from her eyes without her permission. “Y/n, are you okay?” he calls again and she tries to quickly wipe her face. “I can wash your clothes for you,” he offers. 

She opens the door slowly, avoiding his eyes. “You don’t have to do that,” she says to the floor. 

“It’s no problem. I’m washing mine and Taehyung’s clothes anyway.” 

He extends a hand to her, indicating that it’s not much of a request, or at least not something she needs to choose. Forcing her brain to restart out of her stupor she turns to pick up her wet clothes from the floor, using the towel she borrowed to wipe up the excess water. When she turns back to hand them over Jin manages to catch her eyes and the overwhelming sadness he finds there nearly knocks the breath out of him. He’s never seen a girl look so broken, and before he can think through his actions he’s dumping the items she’s given him onto the counter top and pulling her into his chest. A small sound of surprise comes out of her, muffled by his chest. He’s just about to pull away, thinking how he’s just invaded her personal space when her arms raise to weakly encircle his waist. 

“Two hugs in one day,” she mumbles into his chest, but he can still hear the surprise in her voice. "Must be a record."

A breathy laugh escapes Jin’s lips. “Yeah, we’re kind of a huggy family. Sorry.” He tries once again to pull away, but Y/n’s fingers wrap around the fabric of his shirt and her muscles tense, keeping his body against hers. 

She’s too embarrassed even to apologize for her clinginess. She is embarrassed though. She hates to admit how good it feels to be held like this, to feel the warmth of him. Because there’s a feeling she's so used to that she might not be conscious of it if not for the fact that just a little while ago she'd gotten a respite from it, even if for only a few minutes in the car. But it’s abated even now, holding onto Seokjin. It's a feeling that has her on edge almost all the time. It's like she lives behind an invisible barrier between her and the rest of the world, and the isolation has made her skin so sensitive that this small, friendly embrace has set her whole body on fire. She doesn't know if it's a physical feeling or one in her mind. What's the difference anyway? All her nerve endings experience a near-constant state of loneliness. She doesn't know what to call the feeling, but she knows that when Tae held her close in the car it went away. The same way it does when Hobi hugs her tight. The same way it’s gone right now. This simple embrace has momentarily cured her profound lonesomeness, and she doesn’t want to let it go. 

“Do you wanna stand here all night, or do you wanna go to the couch?” he asks simply.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles, trying to talk her muscles into releasing the poor boy. Reluctantly, they obey and she takes a step back.

“I just meant, do you want to stand here hugging or do you want to go cuddle on the couch?”

Y/n blinks at him, unsure if she could have possibly heard correctly. The word cuddle disturbs her, makes her feel small, like a child, and she hates it. But then again it sounds so nice. She’s already feeling numb, wishing she hadn’t let go of him so quickly, but it’s too late. 

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

He shakes his head at her. “I wouldn’t have offered it if it made me uncomfortable.”

“But the other night you wouldn’t even share the bed with me.” She can only stare at him in confusion. 

“That was...different...we won’t be sleeping, and we won’t be in my bed. This is just...comfort.” The word seems strange to her. “If you need it, I don’t mind at all.” He grabs the pile of clothes he’d left on the counter. “I’ll take care of this,” he says and leaves quickly. 

Y/n wanders over to the couch and sits, still feeling too tired to think about anything as simple as turning on the TV or looking at her phone screen that’s lighting up on the coffee table. It’s become more of a habitual accessory than a communication device at this point. 

Seokjin takes her clothes to the washing machine and starts it up before going to sit at the other end of the couch from her, turning off the harsh overhead light and turning on the tv on his way. He doesn’t want to crowd her or make her feel like she’s pressured to accept anything, so he just sits quietly, flipping through channels. 

"Any suggestions?" he asks, not finding much.

"I don't care," she replies casually. She takes a curious look around the room, noticing that the side of the house from which she's only ever heard a man's snoring, is dark and quiet. "Where's your dad?"

"Night shift tonight," Jin responds without taking his eyes off the screen. 

"Hard to believe I've been here three nights and I've never seen him."

The ceaseless button clicking of Jin’s thumb stops. "He works a lot. Two jobs, at a factory and a few nights a week doing security. I don't see him a lot either." The clicking resumes.

"Sorry. My mom works a lot, too." Her voice trails off at the end until it's almost inaudible, which she's thankful for because she can hear the shake in it. He turns his face to her as she wraps her arms around herself, her body shaking slightly. Jin bites the inside of his cheek, wishing he had a magic fix to help her. He doesn’t want to invade her privacy and ask her what’s wrong and he doesn’t want to trespass her boundaries and force her to accept his affection, but damn he just knows she’d feel better if he held her, even just for a minute. This is standard therapy in their household, nothing a good hug can’t fix. When he was young and something upset him, his mother would take him into her arms and hold him tight, humming a quiet song in his ear, and it wouldn’t take long for him to feel better. Without wasting another moment in thought, Jin sucks in a deep breath and releases it quickly before he wraps his hand around her bicep and drags her with him as he flops back onto the cushions. He tucks her in between his body and the back of the couch where she's safe and warm, struggling a little while he gets his arms around her. 

“If you don’t like this, just say so, and we’ll stop,” he tells her in a hushed tone. Her heartbeat settles, calms alongside his. She both hates and loves how well and how quickly it's affecting her. “I just thought maybe you wouldn’t want to ask.” 

"This is so embarrassing," Y/n mumbles into his chest, but she can't deny the way her body is already relaxing into the cushions and into him.

"There's nothing embarrassing about cuddling. It's good for you." He tucks her head in under his chin.

"I guess I just don't have a very affectionate family," she admits to herself, and she's almost too comfortable where she is now for that to hurt her. "Hobi cuddles with me sometimes, but it feels more like an attack." She hears him chuckle softly. "He can be a very clingy baby."

When Jin hums in response she can feel it in his chest, against her face. "Is this okay?"

"It's nice," she admits softly, though she knows 'nice' is a pale word to describe the relief she is feeling. 

"You're welcome to get cuddles here anytime. I don't mind at all." He squeezes her a little tighter in his arms and lets out a happy sigh.  

By the time Tae enters the living room carrying a tray with three large bowls of ramyeon, Y/n's breathing has gotten slow and heavy, and if she isn't already asleep Jin can feel that she will be at any moment. At the sound of his brother stopping behind the couch to take in the sight, Jin opens his eyes to give him a look full of warning, threatening what he'll do to the younger boy if he wakes up the girl in his arms. Tae doesn't know exactly how to respond, so he just shakes his head and continues his journey around the couch to set the tray on the coffee table, sighing in disappointment at the bowls of noodles that are going to go cold. 

"You can watch whatever," Jin whispers, a rare concession from one brother to another who loves to fight for dominance of the TV.

As Tae folds himself down onto the floor, Y/n’s phone catches the attention of both boys when it makes a quiet vibrating sound. Jin reaches behind him to grab it, knowing that, whatever Y/n may be going through, there are people who are probably worried about her. The text messages coming in and the missed calls are from the same man that's filling her lock screen, “MY hope💖”. He takes a chance and is utterly surprised to find she had no passcode. He opens the messages and reads only the ones that have come in most recently. 

By the time Hoseok arrives Tae has finished eating and is moving the clothes from the washer to the dryer. Jin has rolled onto his back to be able to stare at the TV, but Y/n is tucked into his side still and this is as far as he's willing to go, no matter how hungry he is. Just as Tae comes back to the living room there's a quiet but firm knock on the door. 

The street behind Hoseok is still wet, shining under the street lights, but the rain has stopped now. Tae’s surprised by the delicious smell that surrounds the other boy. He can't stop his hungry eyes from flickering down to the brown bag in Hobi's hands. He looks down at the bag too and then back to Tae’s eyes. 

"I figured she- you'd all be hungry." He extends the bag to Tae, who steps aside to let him in. He doesn't mind the hungry look in Tae’s eye. He can eat it all. Hobi can get more, and he's earned it for saving Y/n anyway. 

"She's on the couch," Tae tells him, as if there's anywhere else for him to go when he enters other than the living room. Tae’s trying not to get lost in the heady smell of Hobi's family's dumplings that fills his nostrils. 

Hoseok enters the living room and stops short, shocked to see Y/n sleeping in the arms of Kim Seokjin. He'd never seen her act that way with anyone else, and only reluctantly with him. She and Namjoon barely ever even hugged. Hoseok was the only person that she was ever affectionate with, and it had taken a long time and the force of his personality to gain that kind of trust and intimacy with her. Yet here she is with her head on Kim Seokjin’s shoulder, her legs entwined with his, his t-shirt balled up in her fist while she sleeps. Something indescribable bubbles in his stomach--something he knows he’s felt before but has never been able to name--but he doesn't waste anymore time standing and staring at them. 

Hoseok walks behind the couch and leans over the back while Jin eyes him curiously,  their eyes meeting briefly. He knows Hoseok is her closest friend in the whole world, but to Jin he's just a stranger. Hobi hesitates to wake her, but peaceful as she looks curled into the other boy’s side, he needs to make sure she's okay. He needs to talk to her. Gently, he shakes her shoulder and calls her name. She lets out an adorable moan as she begins to stir that brings a smile to both Jin and Hoseok's faces. Slowly, Y/n opens her eyes to see her best friend's face hovering above her. 

"Hobi!" Her voice is still thick with sleep but there's an undeniable joy there as she lifts herself up to wrap her arms around his neck, not noticing the way she almost hits Jin.

"Hey, babygirl," Hobi chuckles in her ear, pleased with her automatic response to him. He lets her cling to him for as long as she wants. 

"Jin," Tae hisses to his older brother, who’s taking in the scene with wide eyes, motioning with his hand toward the kitchen. A little reluctantly, the eldest slides off the couch and joins his brother.

Once they're gone, Y/n releases Hobi from her hold so that he can come around and sit in front of her. The first thing he does when they're sitting face-to-face, their knees touching, is to grab her by the forearms and place her hands on his face. She's not fooled by his attempts to mask his actions, but she takes his face in her hands and rubs her thumbs over his high cheekbones anyway. Not noticing any discomfort when he holds her wrists, he releases her with a sigh, letting go of a breath that's been trapped in his lungs for hours. That done, he grabs Y/n by the waist and pulls her almost into his lap so that he can wrap his arms around her in a proper hug. 

"I love you," are the first words out of his mouth, muffled by the way he's burying his head in her neck.

"I love you, too," she responds, but he pulls away shaking his head and takes her face in his hands.

"No. I need you to hear me. I love you. Full stop. Whether you love me or not. If you're mad at me or I'm mad at you or we don't talk for weeks or months or years. You're important, and I love you, and I need you to exist, okay? You can't disappear." His eyes glaze over with unshed tears as they stare into hers, searching, begging for understanding from her. She nods and when he releases her face she leans forward to rest her chin on his shoulder. 

"I'm sorry." He wraps his arms tightly around her back. 

"Don't apologize. Don't even think about it. You're allowed to be hurt and upset. You just have to let me be here to help you," he murmurs in her ear and smiles when he feels her nodding again. 

"Promise we won't ever not be talking."

He can't help a small chuckle. "I promise."

"I should go home and take care of Namjoon," she tells him as she pulls away. Hobi's disappointed in her impulse to push her feelings aside for her brother, but not in the decision to go home and he agrees.

"Wait. You guys should stay and eat at least." Taehyung comes surging into the living room carrying bowls and extra sets of chopsticks. Y/n glances between the two boys. 

"It does smell good. But-"

Hoseok cuts her off. "I have more in the car for Namjoon. We can stay for a little bit." She smiles and turns back to Tae to help him set up the food on the coffee table while Hobi pulls out his phone to text her brother. It's good that he has time to give a warning to Namjoon, who's been sitting at home with Yoongi. The last thing Hobi wants tonight is to have to referee between the two of them.

The twenty minutes they spend eating with the Kim brothers is filled with laughter. Y/n does her best to pull off her snarky attitude as she relentlessly clowns on Tae. And even though he knows she's forcing it, even though she doesn't have to, he feels happy receiving her abuse because it has always made him laugh. It seems right. Hobi enjoys watching her interact with her new friends, appreciates the kindness they show her through their actions and their words. It doesn't escape his notice the way Jin puts extra food in her bowl or the way he constantly examines her face for signs of distress. Overall it's a much more amiable environment than the two of them are used to. 

"Sorry for being a burden, and for keeping you up so late," Y/n says as she's sliding into her shoes that are still wet. Hoseok's eyes flicker over her face, knowing burden is a word she uses very specifically, a word that for her involves a lot of fear and insecurity, but he doesn't say anything.

"You're not a burden, Y/n!" Taehyung assures her with his characteristic enthusiasm. 

"You're welcome here anytime, Y/n." Jin gives her a fond smile before he adds, "I'll bring you your clothes tomorrow. You can give mine back whenever." Hoseok's eyes drift over her to notice her clothes for the first time, but again he says nothing. 

"Okay. Thanks. And good luck with your show tomorrow night."

"Don't say that like you're not going to sit with us at lunch tomorrow. You too, Hoseok!" Tae's invitation is so genuine there's no hope of the boy refusing. Whatever confusion Hobi has about the nature of his relationship with Y/n, he likes Tae's energy.

"Sure," Hobi agrees with a wave and guides Y/n to the door with a hand on the small of her back.

The ride to her house is quiet without a word spoken between them. Hobi parks in the driveway, and Y/n is out of the car before he can cut the engine. She walks quickly to the door and pushes it open, finding Namjoon pacing slowly in the living room, but he stops and turns to look up at her. She can't explain the urge to do it--she and Namjoon have barely spoken to each other in two weeks, hardly seen each other face to face--but as soon as she sees him she propels herself forward directly into his chest, wrapping her arms tightly around his body. Her brother is stunned, unsure at first how to respond, not just because she's been so distant from him recently but also because he can't remember the last time they hugged each other. When finally he raises his own arms to hold her, he realizes it must have been a long time, maybe years because he's definitely taller now. The look of shock on Hoseok's face when he comes through the open door perfectly reflects Namjoon's feelings. Yet as unprepared as he was for the embrace he's unwilling to let go when she starts to loosen her hold, and he pulls her in tighter.

"I'm sorry," she whispers. Namjoon leans his head against hers, happy just to hear her voice. 

"I'm just glad you're safe."

Hoseok goes to the kitchen with the food for Namjoon to give them a moment of privacy. He can still hear their voices, and even though he doesn’t know what they’re saying, it warms his heart that they’re finally talking again. 

“I’m sorry for being so awful for you these past couple weeks. I shouldn’t have acted like that,” Y/n cries weakly, still held tightly against her brother’s chest as new tears spill from her tired eyes. 

“I deserved it. I should have supported you, or at least listened to you. And I’m sorry for taking you for granted. I won’t do that anymore, I promise. I missed you, bug.” Namjoon gives her one final squeeze before pulling away. Y/n wipes her nose on her sleeve. 

“I missed you, too, you big dummy.”

“Whose shirt is that?” Namjoon wonders all the sudden. “Seokjin’s?”

Y/n couldn’t help laughing at the nearly accusatory tone of his questions. “Yeah,” she admits with a sheepish grin. 

“Wait-” Namjoon sighs, dropping his hands by his sides. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter. I’m just glad they helped you.”

“Me, too. Not gonna lie, I had no idea where I was.”

“Y/n, you can’t just go wandering around at night!”

“I didn’t. I went wandering during the day, and then...I got lost at night.” They both sigh heavily. “I didn’t mean to. I’ll try not to do it again.”

“Good. Now go get ready for bed.”

Y/n rolls her eyes with a, “Sir, yes, sir,” before moving toward the hallway. “Oh, and Hobi brought you food,” she adds, catching the smile that lights up his face before she turns to leave. 

Even though she’s had just about all she thinks she can stand of being wet tonight, Y/n decides to take a hot shower anyway. Despite being dry she feels the need to be clean. She wishes desperately that she could clean away all the things that feel so terribly wrong about her on the inside. As she does her best to wash every part the water can reach, she realizes that although she and Namjoon apologized to each other, they didn’t talk about what was actually happening to them. Because they never talk about it. Aside from the other day when Namjoon practically accused her of abandoning him, they’ve never had a real conversation about the hurtful things both of their parents have done to them. They’ve never talked about what it meant when their dad left them without any warning. They’ve never talked about the fact that their mother would rather work anywhere in the world than be at home with them, or that the reason they live alone and not with relatives is because of her own pride. Y/n’s never told Namjoon about the time that she overheard their mother tell their father that she never wanted the burden of children, and that he’d said he didn’t want it either. As sweet as it is that Hobi loves her and her new friends are kind, it can’t make up for the hurt she feels. She doesn’t notice she’s crying again as these thoughts swirl around in her mind and they don’t stop until Namjoon is banging on the bathroom door. 

“Hurry up, bug!”

“Sorry,” she replies slowly, shutting off the water immediately. Quickly, she wraps a towel around herself and slinks back to her room with water still dripping from her hair, Namjoon slipping in the bathroom right after her. She decides to put Jin’s shirt back on, finding comfort in the smell of him and the memory of what he did for her. She takes the time to dry her hair again, and when she turns off the blow dryer the house is dead quiet. Namjoon must have gone to sleep. She tries to do the same but after just a few minutes of lying in the darkness she realizes that her intrusive thoughts have no intention of letting her rest. Despite her exhaustion she pulls herself from bed and over to her desk to open her laptop, slips on her headphones and plays the first track under the artist Heart, mouthing along silently to every word.

After she’s gone through all of Heart’s songs twice--there aren’t very many of them--she pushes herself away from the desk and walks quietly into the dark hallway, rubbing her eyes from the brightness of the screen. She goes straight to the kitchen and drinks a glass of water without turning on any lights, but the unexpected sound of steady breathing has her fumbling for the closest light switch as she traverses the living room again. 

“H-Hobi?” she stutters out when she sees the boy spread out on the couch. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you,” she apologizes, flipping the lights off again. 

“I hadn’t fallen asleep yet,” he assures her. 

“What are you still doing here? I thought you’d left.”

“My parents didn’t want me driving home so late, so they asked me to stay the night and bring the car back before school.” Y/n lets out a soft sound of understanding. It’s nice, she thinks, that his parents care about something like that. “You should go to sleep, angel.”

Y/n walks over to lean against the end of the couch. “I can’t, Hobi.” She knows what she needs, but she chews on the inside of her cheek. She couldn’t even get the words out before, she definitely can’t ask now, can she? And what would it mean if that’s the only way she can fall asleep? What would she do then? Just as she’s about to turn and hurry back to her room without saying any more, Hoseok sits up, sensing that whatever words she’s holding back will need some coaxing to get out. 

“What is it, babygirl?”

“It’s dumb but…”

“Hmm?”

“Can you...could you…” She groans, exasperated with herself and her own neediness. 

“Tell me what you need,” Hobi begs after she falls completely silent again. “You know I’ll do anything to make you feel better.”

“Can you come hold me ‘til I fall asleep?” She forces all the words out in a rush so none of them get stuck in her throat. 

A smile spreads wide across Hobi’s face because he’s proud of her for asking for what she needs and because he’s honored she trusts him with such a request. He throws off his blanket and springs up from the couch. “Of course I will. I’ll hold you all night.”

Together they walk back to her bedroom and she makes Hoseok get in close to the wall before she gets in the bed with him. This isn’t the first time they’ve shared a bed, nor the first time they’ve fallen asleep cuddling, but usually it’s because Hoseok is afraid of thunderstorms. 

“You sure are clingy tonight,” he teases as she scoots in, pulling away as soon as he says it. “Hey, no! I was kidding. Come here.” He pulls her back in and locks her in his arms. A minute passes as they get comfortable, fitting into each other perfectly, but he can feel she’s still holding a breath. His cheek brushes over hers so he can whisper in her ear, and her cheeks warm. “You’re gonna be okay,” he tells her. “I know it doesn’t seem like it, but you’re strong. A lot stronger than you should have to be, but you’re gonna be okay.”

She hates the fact that his words bring tears to her eyes and she pushes her face into his neck because she’s just so damn tired of crying. He hushes her gently, and she takes one deep breath, letting it out completely until finally she lets go of the remaining tension, allowing Hoseok’s natural warmth to lull her to sleep once and for all as he presses several soft kisses to the top of her head.

>>

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[sopebubbles-reads]

@sopebubbles bulletproof heart is reblogged here. It sort of out of order and may be difficult to navigate. You can try searching for the number of the post you want to read and find it that way.

[sopebubbles]

❣thirty: a deal

Bulletproof Heart

Hoseok's stomach turns whenever he thinks of Yoongi's hands on Y/n. Seeing the other boy try to kiss her the night before had filled him with rage. It wasn't just the uneasy, bubbling feeling he'd gotten when he saw Y/n with Seokjin, or even the concern he felt when he saw her kissing Tae. No, this was pain, like he heart was being ripped out. The thought of Yoongi forcing himself on her made him sick, even worse that he wasn't there to stop it and couldn't make her feel better at the time.

"Wait. I remember that night," Hoseok interrupts as she tells him about the incident while they sit in his bedroom. "I remember that night, going into your bed and you didn't come in until several minutes later. You locked the door. You looked scared. That was why?" Y/n only nods while he paces in front of her. "But that...Y/n was that your first kiss?"

She nods again. "I didn't want it to be my first other things. And he seemed like he was in that mood, y'know? So I went to my room." Hoseok comes down to his knees right in front of her and takes her hands in his. 

"Angel, why didn't you tell me?" He rests his chin on her knee and frowns at her.

"I didn't want you to worry." Y/n shrugs. 

"I can't remember, when was this?"

"Right before school started."

Hoseok eyebrows raise together. "Right before Yoongi started being really awful to you?" 

Y/n hums and nods. She'd thought vaguely about that connection before but she hadn't wanted to look at it too closely.

"I think I'm gonna be sick. I don't want to think that he started acting like that because...what? He liked you and you rejected him? It doesn't make sense."

Y/n shakes her head sadly. "I honestly don't know. Maybe he wanted me to stop hanging around so much. I really didn't think he remembered. He acted like nothing had happened the next day."

Hoseok scoffs. "That was to save his stupid pride. I've never known someone so disgustingly bad at emotions. I can't believe all of this has been because you brushed him off."

Y/n looks down sadly rubbing her toes together. "Are you mad at me?"

Hobi can't help but let out a surprised laugh and cock his head to the side. "What should I be mad at you for, babygirl?"

"I don't know." She can't explain the tears in her eyes either or why they start to fall. "For not telling you or for not confronting him. For letting things get this far. For everything falling apart."

Seeing her cry once again, when it's something she rarely used to do, breaks his heart all over again. Hoseok quickly moves from his spot on the floor to sit with her on the bed. He pulls her in between his legs and cups her cheeks in his hands to wipe away her tears. "Baby, no. I do wish you had told me, but none of this is your fault. You didn't invite or encourage any of these actions. I don't blame you for anything." He continues to hold her face in his hands as she nods her understanding and her tears cease to flow. He's suddenly overwhelmed by being so close to her. It's not as though he hasn't been so close to her before, especially recently. But right now the way her red rimmed eyes are looking at him is making his heart beat fast, and the scent of her is filling his nostrils, making him want to lean into her neck for more. His eyes flicker from her own down to her lips, and he's close enough, his brain tells him, it's just a few inches between them he could close and kiss her soft lips. He never has before. Never dared, hardly ever even thought about it, really. Not until recently. But now it seems like everyone else has, so there is something inside of him that tells him her lips should be kissing his and not that kid Taehyung's. Definitely not that bastard, Min Yoongi. The question briefly flits across his mind, if she's kissed Seokjin yet. He could lean in, but he doesn't. He won't take what's not his like some do. He could ask, but how could he possibly speak the words to his best friend? Still he'll scream if he isn't somehow closer to her, so he tilts his head to the side and kisses her damp cheek before he pulls her closer to him and breathes her in.

"I can't think of anything you would ever do that would make me truly angry with you, angel. So don't worry about that, okay?"

"Okay," she mumbles into his shoulder as she wraps her arms around him. She'd felt the tension of that moment too, but it all happened so fast she thinks maybe she'd imagined it, like all the other moments she thinks she's imagined with him. We're just close, she tells herself. We've always just been close.

"But you'd tell me if you kissed Seokjin, right?" He can't seem to stop the words from coming out of his mouth but he wishes he could shove them back inside.

Y/n snorts. "I don't think you'll have to worry about that."

Hoseok pulls away to see her expression. It's slightly sad, but he can't guess why. "What makes you say that? You two seem crazy about each other."

Y/n let's her hands rest in between them and focuses on them while she talks. "I wouldn't go that far. We have actually talked about our feelings for each other, or at least he said he likes me and I said I'm confused because my whole life is a mess. But truthfully I just think he deserves someone a whole lot better than me, and I haven't figured out how to tell him that yet."

Hoseok's whole face contorts. "Okay, I take it back. You can make me a little angry at you if you talk badly about yourself. How could he find anyone better than you?"

"Cmon, Hobi. I know you love me in spite of knowing every terrible thing about me and my life, but I'm a disaster and he should be with someone he can just have fun with and doesn't have to save all the time."

He hums. "I think he likes saving you," Hobi muses. "Don't get me wrong. I'm sure he'd much rather you had a simpler, nicer life just as much as I do. But I think he's more than happy to be there for you any time the need arises. Jin isn't an idiot. He knows what he's getting into and what he can handle. I think if he likes you and you like him, you shouldn't let that hold you back." 

Y/n gives him a shy smile. "You'd give me away that easily?" she teases. 

Hobi swallows thickly. He knows it's a joke, but it takes him a moment before he can respond in kind. "Don't you think I deserve better than a mess like you, too?" His smile lets her know he doesn't mean it, but she responds sincerely. 

"Absolutely. In fact, I don't think there's anyone in the world good enough to deserve my Hope." She pauses to smirk at him. "Except maybe Kim Seokjin."

Hobi laughs heartily. "Maybe I'll steal him from you."

Y/n's features fall, but not because of the thought of losing Seokjin to her best friend.

"What is it?" He asks with a nudge.

"Namjoon still has never come out to me. I'm sure he didn't think I knew about his feelings for Yoongi. So I just wondered...about you…"

"If I'm gay?"

"If you're anything...but you don't have to tell me. It's personal, so…"

Hobi smiles wide, amused that she thinks there's anything he wouldn't share with her if she asked, as if there's anything too personal between. "Well, for your information, I'm bi."

"No way, me too! High five!" The two slap their hands together before unraveling into a fit of laughter. Soon their giggles settle and silence falls again. "You know Joon was out of line last night. But I know he didn't mean it."

Y/n twiddle her thumbs. "Maybe he did, maybe he didn’t," she replies sadly.

"It's okay to be mad at him. It was wrong."

"I'm not mad. What he said hurt, obviously. But I can't imagine how much he's hurting if he said those things. I wish I could make it better for him. But we never let each other in, do we? Maybe if I'd told him sooner..." Y/n's eyes drift to gaze out the window to the gloomy skies outside.

"I'm sure you'll find a way to put things back together eventually. But some time and space to think and grow may not be the worst thing." Hobi's thumb strokes over her cheek soothingly. When she only responds sigh a small nod, he tries to think of a distraction. "Hey! We were supposed to work on a song!" Hoseok suddenly remembers. 

"Oh, yeah! Let me show you some beats." Hobi hands over the bag he brought for her from her house, and they spend the next couple of hours discussing their collaboration, still sitting just as close.

>>

Taglist is still open!! [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld    @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @hobizi @secretlycrazyhummingbird @lyra0cassiopeia @ventusnonexpectat @theestrangeddreamer @softychimseok

[sopebubbles]

❣twenty-three: Kool kids

Bulletproof Heart

A/n: you can more or less ignore these time stamps bc some are messed up, and it takes place over multiple days, just in case you're worried about the timeline.

Taglist is still open!! [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @hobizi @secretlycrazyhummingbird @lyra0cassiopeia @ventusnonexpectat

[sopebubbles]

❣twenty-eight: collaboration

Bulletproof Heart

Word count: about 500

"I can't believe Y/n really isn't coming to practice today," Taehyung grumbles as he adjusts a mic stand. 

"I know. I've gotten so used to having her here," Jungkook agrees as he slips his guitar strap over his head. 

"We shouldn't have pushed her boundaries," Jin admonishes them, himself included. "That's a very important lesson for you. But it's okay that she isn't here today because I have a new song I want to work on."

"A new song, hyung?" Jimin sits on his stool and taps out a short beat. 

“Yep, new song. I’ll play you the melody and then we can figure it out from there. Sound good?” All the boys nod along and listen to the rather simple melody Jin had developed so far. Jungkook elaborates it in his own unique way while Tae backs them up on bass along with Jimin’s drums. After quite a while of jamming and working things out they take a break. 

“So, I’m assuming your song has some lyrics, hyung?” Tae asks as he sets down his bass to get a drink. 

Jin pauses with a water bottle to his lips. He gulps down a few sips before he replies. Of course he knew he’d have to show them the lyrics eventually, but now he’s feeling rather shy. “Yeah, of course,” he finally answers with a lump in his throat the water could not wash down. 

“Let’s hear ‘em then,” Jimin smirks. He has a feeling he knows what’s going on, but he’s thoroughly enjoying seeing Jin get a little flustered. 

“Sure. Everyone back in place.” Jin slips his guitar strap over his head once again and waits for the others to join him, clearing his throat before he lets Jimin count them off. As Jin begins to sing along with the new music Jungkook is too immersed in what he’s playing to pay much attention to what Jin is singing in his sweet voice. Sweeter than usual in fact. As Jimin and Taehyung listen to Jin's lyrics they can't help looking at each other and smiling. They only break eye contact when the song is over to turn and look at Jin. 

"I think it sounds really good!" Jungkook cheers before either of them can comment. 

"Yeah, it's great, hyung. I wonder who you wrote it for?" There's a teasing lilt in Tae's voice that has Jin's ears turning red. 

He removes the guitar from his body before he clears his throat to mumble, "I think that's enough practice for today. You guys have homework to do." And with that,  he walks out of the garage and into the house without looking at any of them. Tae and Jimin manage to hold back their laughter just until he makes it inside and then they're uncontainable, Jimin so out of control in his fit that he falls right off his stool, knocking down a cymbal on the way that clatters loudly, adding to the chaos that only confuses Jungkook. He won't be able to get an answer out of them for at least five minutes. 

>>

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[sopebubbles]

❣eleven: what am I forgetting

Bulletproof Heart

A/n: fuuuuckkkk (ignore the time stamps here, they're all jacked up and I dont feel like fixing them. These conversations all happen the morning after party)

I wanna pick up the phone, ask my dad how to handle it // But what will happen when my dad's not there to answer it? -[be alone by childish gambino]

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[sopebubbles]

❣twenty-two: I remember

Bulletproof Heart

Word count: 1.4k

Warnings: swearing (I don't think Yn even curses this much now, but she’s trying to be cool)

Min Yoongi is playing alone on the basketball courts the first time Namjoon works up the courage to talk to him. He'd seen the smaller boy around school his first week, and he'd already developed a small crush. The only things he knows about him are his name, that he's a year older and that he's interested in hip-hop. Very few people knew more about Yoongi beyond his reputation as a loner and that he could be a bit of an asshole. But none of that seems to bother Namjoon. When Yoongi's ball ricochets off the backboard, Namjoon takes the chance to come closer, catching the ball and dribbling it a few times on the pavement. Yoongi slips his headphones off in order to speak to the stranger.

"Can I have my ball back?"

"Sure," Namjoon replies after a dazed moment, finding that Yoongi is even cuter than he had previously thought when he sees him up close. He passes the ball back and Yoongi catches it. 

"You ball?" Yoongi asks, though he doesn't know why. He never talks to anyone if he can help it.

"Not much."

"Too bad. You're tall as shit. If I were as tall as you I'd devote my whole life to basketball," Yoongi bemoans as he turns to sink a shot.

"I like hip-hop," Namjoon blurts out, hearing the beats coming much too loud from Yoongi's headphones. Yoongi looks at him strangely for a moment.

"Really?" 

"Mm yeah. I really like Epik High and Eminem. Who are you listening to?" Namjoon jerks his chin in the other boy's direction.

"You've never heard of this rapper," Yoongi informs him with a smug smile.

"Oh yeah? Who is it?" Namjoon challenges, taking another step closer.

"It's me," Yoongi smirks.

"No shit! Can I listen?" 

Yoongi is instantly taken aback by the sincere interest Namjoon shows. "Wait. Really?"

"Hell yeah. I've never met anyone else who raps before," Namjoon tells him.

With slight hesitation, Yoongi removes the headphones from around his neck and passes them to Namjoon. 

"You make your own beats and everything?" Namjoon asks before he even slips them on.

"Mhm. I've got some equipment and programs and stuff at my house." He's bragging a little. 

"That's sick." 

Yoongi fights a smile as he watches this strange boy close his eyes and disappear into a world of Yoongi's making. He envies the boy's physique, tall and broad, even if he's still growing into his limbs a bit. Probably a little uncoordinated, Yoongi thinks, but it's better than being small. He watches Namjoon bob his head along to the beat Yoongi had created and the small changes in his facial expression as he listens to the words. When the song ends he hands the headphones back.

"That was really good. It reminded me…"

"Of what?" Yoongi wonders when he doesn't continue.

"Nothing, just my dad." Namjoon shakes his head as if he can rid himself of the thought that way. 

"Oh. He must be an asshole then," Yoongi responds, since the lyrics had been about his own father figures.

"Yeah, you could say that," Namjoon agrees. "He left." He's not sure why he felt like divulging that piece of personal information to a perfect stranger. Maybe it's just because it's still raw, or maybe just because he thinks Yoongi will understand. They both look down to the ground until Yoongi finally lifts his head to speak.

"Hey, fuck 'em, right?"

Namjoon smiles ironically. "Right." 

"You said you rap, too?"

"Yeah. Well, kinda. I write. If I knew how to make beats like you, then maybe I'd be getting somewhere." Namjoon's attention is drawn away by the buzzing in his pocket that he's been ignoring for several minutes. 

"Maybe you could show me your lyrics some time and I'll show you some stuff, too," Yoongi offers.

"That would be awesome." Namjoon looks at the screen of his phone and groans. "I gotta go pick up my sister. But I'll find you tomorrow!"

"Sure," Yoongi says as Namjoon is already backing away. "Hey, wait. What's your name?" 

"Namjoon!"

"Hey, Namjoon. You're better off without him," Yoongi calls back as the tall boy gets further and further away.

>>

A week passes before Yoongi invites Namjoon and Hoseok over to his house after school. Namjoon introduced his childhood best friend to his new friend the very next day, and they've been eating lunch together every day since. Namjoon had explained to Yoongi that he would have to bring his sister along, to which the older boy had just shrugged. Y/n is hanging on to Hoseok's arm when they are brought into Yoongi's house for the first time. 

It's big inside, bigger than their own home and they live comfortably. Everything inside is new and of the highest quality, including the computers and monitors and sound equipment Yoongi has in his room. Y/n finds herself in front of his piano and impulsively strikes a few keys.

"Don't touch that," Yoongi barks at her and she immediately withdraws the hand as if the instrument has burned her. Hoseok reaches out for her other hand and pulls her close in front of him where he can wrap his arms around her shoulders and rest his head on hers, as if to protect her while Yoongi explains what all the very expensive items in his room do.

"So anyway, I thought of a beat for that one song you showed me, if you want to check it out," Yoongi concludes after his long winded explanation that Y/n had stopped listening to in favor of messing with Hoseok's hair.

>>

Three months later Y/n is sitting in front of Yoongi's piano, waiting for him to come out of the bathroom so they can listen to a song they finished the day before.

"Hey, I thought I told you not to touch that," Yoongi chides her as he comes out. 

"You're just salty because I play better than you."

"Do not, you brat."

"Dick." Y/n's hands cease playing and she turns to share an amused smile with him, as if it's some kind of inside joke. "Let's listen!" She urges, moving to sit beside Hobi on Yoongi's bed. 

"Are you gonna put it on SoundCloud?" Y/n asks after they listen to the song featuring all three boys. 

"We've been over this, Y/n. We aren't SoundCloud rappers," Namjoon replies in a way so typical of him that she and Hobi both mouth the words with mocking expressions to each other. 

"Oh, right. I forgot. You want to be bedroom rappers and never have anyone listen to your stuff." 

Yoongi scoffs without looking away from his screen.

"I think she's right, guys. I mean this is fun and all, but what's it for if no one ever hears us," Hoseok argues. 

"You think people would actually listen to us?" Namjoon asks, looking doubtfully at his little sister. 

"Look, I know you're scared but-"

"We aren't scared," Yoongi interrupts. 

"BuUut, I definitely think people would listen. And then you could get a following and then you could enter one of those underground rap battles they have at The Den!" Y/n looks around at the three boys with her, only to find her enthusiasm met with hesitancy. 

"How do you even know about rap battles at The Den? You're like eight." Yoongi taunts. 

"Fuck you, I'm thirteen. And I can fucking read, unlike some people. I saw a flyer outside the Jungs's restaurant."

"Damn, who taught you to curse like that?" Namjoon can't help but laugh. 

"You, duh." She looks to Yoongi, knowing that the other boys will follow whatever he decides. "What do you think?"

Yoongi looks for a moment at the small girl, still wearing her school uniform and pigtails, and sighs. "We'll need a name."

"What about 'The Boy Scouts'?" Hoseok jokes. 

"What about 'D-Town Boyz'?" Yoongi offers, not wanting to admit that he's thought about it before. 

"That's fuckin stupid. Keep thinking," Y/n tells him, earning a scowl. 

"Alright forget the group name for now. What about our individual stage names?" Namjoon asks. 

"I'll stick with J-Hope." Hoseok smiles at Y/n because he loves it when she calls him "my hope" instead. 

"I think you should be 'Rap Monster'," Yoongi tells Namjoon.

"Me?"

"Yeah! You're the best at writing raps out of the three of us. I think it fits!" Yoongi encourages. Namjoon can feel the blood rushing to his face, making him blush. 

"Mm, okay. And you?"

"I'll be 'Gloss'."

>>

A/n: the app I use for the Instagram posts didn't give me a way to show that these were from different points from 2 years ago to 6 months ago.

Taglist is still open!! [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @hobizi @secretlycrazyhummingbird @lyra0cassiopeia @ventusnonexpectat

[sopebubbles]

❣twenty-four: a date

Bulletproof Heart

Word count: about 500

The Bulletproof boys and Y/n arrive at the Jung family restaurant to the surprise of Mama Jung, who wasn’t expecting to see Y/n in the presence of yet more boys. Hobi is also surprised. He hasn’t spoken to Y/n in a few days, since they talked about Namjoon and Yoongi, each thinking, mistakenly, that the other is mad at them. Y/n gives him a shy smile as she passes by, but avoids eye contact as she follows the boys to a table. Hoseok is the one who comes to take their order a few minutes later. Y/n only orders quietly and keeps her head down. When he leaves, the younger boys go back to their usual chatter, but Seokjin notices how down she looks after seeing her best friend. 

“Is everything alright with you two?” Jin asks softly. 

“It’s a long story,” she mumbles, because doesn’t want to get into it. He doesn’t have time to press her because Jimin is suddenly after her attention. 

“We should come here again some time Y/n, just the two of us,” Jimin says, grinning beside her. She stares at him for a moment, just like everyone else, not knowing how to respond. “You know, as a date,” he adds, just as Hoseok is returning with their drinks. He stops short at the table, holding the cups, his mouth open slightly in surprise. 

“A date?” Y/n repeats. 

“Yeah, a date,” he emphasises. Hoseok leans over the table to set the drinks in front of the ones who ordered them, but he glares at Jimin. “What’s wrong with that? Is someone else going to take you on a date?” Jimin looks intentionally at Jin and then at Hobi as he straightens up. 

Y/n does the reverse, looking at her best friend first to see the disappointed contempt in his eyes. Hoseok likes Jimin, just not as someone for Y/n to date. Then she looks at Jin, who looks utterly shocked. He never thought the kid would actually have the guts to ask her out, not seriously, not after all the times she had dismissed the notion before. When he catches her eye, he feels nothing but shame for his cowardice and regret for not being more explicit with his intentions toward her. Sadly, he looks away, knowing he can’t now blurt out that she should date him instead, no matter how much he wants to. Hoseok wipes his hands on his apron as he watches the two exchange looks and then quickly walks away, realizing that although he’d been pulled in by the mess of glances, he doesn’t need to and can’t stand here any longer.

“Yeah, no, you’re right,” Y/n finally responds. “I’ll go out with you Jimin. No one else wants to ask me out, right? Just...not here.”

“Sure, wherever,” Jimin responds with a smile and a wink. Y/n’s eyes remain glued to the table top for the next several minutes until their food arrives. The car ride home is nearly silent, and Jin drops Y/n off first. 

>>

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[sopebubbles]

❣twenty: give it to me

Bulletproof Heart

Word count: 3k

Warnings: abusive language (you know who), very little angst, mostly fluff

(Credits for these lyrics go to my beastie, who so graciously gave them to Y/n)

Y/n is hiding in the crowd, which isn’t all that easy to do because pretty much all the regulars here know her face, but no one is supposed to know for sure if she’s here tonight. Yoongi and Namjoon don’t know she’s there, only Hobi and the Bulletproof boys. Being there to support her is the only reason Hobi hadn’t quit the group yet, because after the events at the party a week ago he had just about had it with his friends. He’d spent all week avoiding them, skipping practice and lunches just so he wouldn’t have to look at Yoongi’s face. The only thing holding him back from decking the smaller boy was Y/n’s insistence that she fight her own battles in her own way. So after she revealed her project to him, they agreed he’d wait until after the show tonight, and then he’d be free. She didn’t love that he was quitting because she hated being the reason they were breaking up, but it was his choice. She couldn’t blame him since she wasn’t keen to see Yoongi either. 

Just as the Boyz come out on stage, Y/n slips from the back corner where she’s been hiding to the backstage door, but not before she sees the Bulletproof boys enter the club, sticking out like sore thumbs in their flannel and leather, with their baby faces. In the back, where she’s practically alone, Y/n paces and wrings her hands until she finally makes a snap decision and pulls out her phone.

Come back stage!!

Within a minute all four Bulletproof boys hurry noisily through the door. 

“You okay, Y/n?” Seokjin is quick to ask. The other boys follow closely behind him.

“Yeah, just nervous,” she replies rather quietly, shaking her hands in front of her until Jin grabs them. 

“Hey, don’t be nervous. You’re gonna be amazing!” Tae cheers. 

“Your songs are so good, Y/nie, don’t worry about it!” Kook adds.

“You look amazing by the way.” Jimin eyes her up and down. Jin shoots him a glare and steps on his foot before turning back to Yn with a smile.

"Everything is gonna be great, Y/n. Everyone's gonna love you. What you're doing is huge. But no matter what happens there are at least five people here who are going to be proud of you no matter what." She can't help smiling at Seokjin's words, but before she can respond she hears the song end and the next one begin. It's almost time. By the end of Cypher she'll make her debut.

Y/n squeezes Jin's hands that are still holding hers. "I gotta go, but thank you guys for coming. It really means a lot."

"Knock 'em dead, Y/n," Jin tells her as she pulls away.

Y/n makes her way to the side of the stage, still off in the wings so she can't be seen yet. The sound guy hands her a microphone and she clutches it nervously. Hobi finishes his verse of the Cypher and glances over to where he knows she should be, winking at her with a smile before looking out to the crowd. Yoongi and Namjoon are too focused on the song as Namjoon raps out his verse. The song is coming toward its height and the crowd can feel it in. Everyone always anticipates Yoongi's verse the most, the greatest showcase of his technical skills as well as his writing. It's his moment to shine, until Y/n takes it from him. She starts the verse with him, stepping out of the shadows and onto the stage. Yoongi doesn't even notice the other voice coming through the speakers until he looks to the audience only to find their eyes are not on him. He looks in the same direction that everyone's gaze is drawn and is shocked to see Y/n walking across the stage toward him, matching him syllable for syllable on his own song. As she comes to stand toe to toe with him, Yoongi drops his hand to let the mic hang by his side. He stares at her, seething as she finishes his verse alone. 

Down below the stage the crowd is losing their minds as they get their first glimpse of Heart. They watch her push Yoongi out of his place and claim it for her own. As the song ends, talk goes up around the crowd about Y/n and Yoongi and what they just witnessed. Yoongi is bright red, barely holding himself back, for once in his life too angry for words. Jhope grabs her by the wrist and pulls her back a step, subtly placing himself between the two. 

"Heart, everybody!" Hoseok introduces her and the crowd goes wild. From one side of the room starts a chant of her new name and when Y/n looks in that direction she can see it's the Bulletproof boys who've started it, but the rest of the crowd is quickly joining in. 

Namjoon is stunned. He hadn't seen this coming at all, but he's pleasantly surprised and really impressed by the skill Y/n just displayed. He smiles broadly as he grabs her by the shoulder and pulls her into his side. He waves to someone off stage. She'd lied to him earlier in the day and said she wouldn't come to their show, but he'd already planned to surprise her by dedicating their show to her on her birthday, and he's prepared just in case she changed her mind about coming. Since she did, he signals for one of their friends to bring out a cake with lit candles, and he and Hobi start singing happy birthday. 

"Make a wish Y/n." Namjoon smiles down on her, and she closes her eyes and blows out her candles.

"Wanna know what I wished for?" she asks into the microphone. 

"What's your wish, babygirl?" Hobi responds, pretty sure he already knows. 

"I want this stage for tonight." The audience responds with claps and cheers, and she smiles back at them.

"Then it's yours," Hobi agrees and the sound guy begins to play the music. Yoongi recognizes it immediately. He's listened to the track more times today than he'd ever admit. His barely controlled rage is rising, but Namjoon is pulling him by the arm and leading him off stage. Y/n proceeds with “Dull,” followed by “Space” and the crowd cheers her on, only a few staunch supporters of Gloss grumbling to themselves. It feels good to be on stage, even though it isn’t exactly what she wanted. For months she’d been desperate to be up here with the Boyz, her boys. But it was better than nothing. At least she was finally able to prove what she could do in a way that even Yoongi wouldn't be able to deny, right? When she finishes, she accepts their applause and then heads backstage after giving Jin a quick nod with her head for them to come back, too. 

Hoseok is the first to throw his arms around her after she hands off her mic and enters the back room, lifting her slightly off the ground. “I’m so freaking proud of you, babygirl. You were amazing out there!”

“Wow, Y/n, you totally surprised me, but you were really great,” Namjoon chimes in from a few feet away. 

“Yeah, very surprising. Who the hell told you that you could do that?” Yoongi practically yells from beside Namjoon, his voice full of acid. 

Hobi releases her to turn back to the other boy, staying between them but without being in the way. By now all the other boys have entered the room as well. 

Y/n scoffs. “No one told me I could. Well, except for Jaehyun. I didn’t need anyone’s permission.”

“After everything, you’re just gonna disrespect me like that? ON MY STAGE?” Yoongi bellows, and when he moves toward her everyone else moves too. Jin comes to stand on her other side, opposite Hoseok while the younger boys crowd in closer. Jimin’s hands tense into fists, while Kook and Tae turn to look at Y/n with wide eyes. It’s Namjoon who puts his hand to Yoongi’s chest, holding the smaller man back without saying a word. 

"Good job, Y/n. Got a whole army of dudes at your beck and call. Guess it pays to be a whore, doesn't it? How many of them have you fucked exactly?" Yoongi sneers at her, but Y/n's face remains hard and neutral. She's the only one though.

"Shut the hell up, Yoongi. You can't talk to her like that. You can't talk to anyone like that!" Jin interrupts.

"Mm, is she good, Jin? You like sharing her with everyone else? She's just using you because she likes the attention, you know?" Yoongi’s eyes never leave Y/n’s.

“That’s it!” Hobi yells, placing himself fully between the two of them now. “I’ve held back for long enough. I’m gonna-”

Y/n grabs his arm to hold him back. “Hobi, stop. There are too many people here. And it doesn’t matter anyway. If he doesn’t see now, he never will. It’s fine. Let’s just leave.”

“No, Y/n! I’m sick of this. I’m sick of you letting him get away with everything. It’s not right!” Hobi protests, pulling his arm out of her grip and rushing forward to push Yoongi back a few feet. 

They're stopped by a loud voice. “This is what you’ve been saying to her?” Namjoon interjects, stepping up between his friends now, pushing Hobi gently away with his body. “This is what’s been going on that nobody will tell me about?”

Yoongi looks up at Namjoon, the intensity in his eyes fading a bit. “Namjoon-”

“No, I think you’ve said enough. Back off, Yoongi.” Hoseok and Y/n look at Namjoon, stunned. It’s the first time in over a year he’s said anything to Yoongi about the way he goes after Y/n, certainly the first time since his words became less friendly taunts and more ruthless insults. The shock seems to have taken all the fight out of Hoseok, and Y/n reaches for his hand again just to be sure. 

“C’mon, Y/n. Let's all go get dinner to celebrate you,” Jin offers, holding out his hand to her as well. She smiles thankfully at him and takes his hand, pulling Hobi with her. 

“Oh, and I quit the group,” Hobi says as he follows Y/n toward the door. “Joon, are you coming?”

“Yeah,” he agrees, walking toward the door shaking his head. 

"Namjoon, wait!" Yoongi calls weakly after him. 

"We'll talk tomorrow, Yoongi. Right now I need to be with my sister. Or did you forget who she is to me? Have you forgotten everything?" With that, all seven of them exit together, leaving Yoongi completely alone. 

>>

At the restaurant, the mood is much lighter. Y/n sits between her brother and Seokjin, with Jungkook on the other side of Namjoon and the other three boys on the opposite side of the table. It warms Y/ns heart to see how well Hobi gets along with Tae and Jimin, who can be loud and chaotic, but are evenly matched by her best friend. On her right side, Jin is talking to her about her lyrics and which ones he likes, which are pretty much all the ones he remembers. It isn't until she notices Hoseok looking at Namjoon that she realizes he's pretty out of it. She turns away from Jin to elbow her brother's side. 

"Hey, oppa, what's up?" She jars him abruptly from his thoughts. 

"Huh? Nothing." He shrugs.

"Don't worry about it, oppa." Y/n shakes her head.

"How can you say that? How can you keep saying that?" Namjoon demands. "Why have you been hiding me from this?"

Y/n sighs heavily. She knows they should have talked about it a long time ago, but talking isn’t something the two of them are very good at. "Because I know how important he is to you, Joonie oppa. I know he means a lot to you. And he's nice to you. He's your best friend. I don't want you to lose him, too. You've lost enough."

Namjoon turns his face to the ceiling to fight back the involuntary tears and takes a deep breath before he turns his face back to her. "I'm sorry for failing you so much recently. I've really messed up."

Just as Y/n is about to respond, they're interrupted by Jin's loud laughter, caused by something ridiculous Tae is doing.  

"I'm...actually okay. Or I think I will be," she tells him as she looks around the table at all her friends. "I'm really not alone."

Namjoon sighs, a little remorseful. But he knows she's right. Despite everything, she's ended up in a good place and as long as Hobi stays by her side he can worry a little less about her and her new friends. Namjoon smiles a little, reassuring her, and they both turn their attention to the food and to the other boys. 

>>

"Alright, boys, everyone pay up," Jin instructs them when they finish eating, and they all reach for their pockets.

"Put your money away," Namjoon orders, reaching for his own wallet. "This one's on mom." Y/n can't help laughing as Joon pulls out the "emergency card."

"It's the least she could do, really," Hobi responds, barely veiling his hatred of the woman for her neglect. AS they all get up from the table, Hobi drapes an arm over Y/n’s shoulders. "Let's get you home, babygirl.”

"No, I don't want tonight to be over yet!" She whines as she can see the group is about to disperse. "Mmm. Come over to our place and watch a movie."

"It's getting pretty late, Y/nie." Seokjin frowns, because he would love to keep spending time with her, and he hates the idea of leaving. He's found himself wanting nothing but time with her since they first went out to eat earlier this week. 

"So? You can stay at our place. Who's going to stop you?" Y/n turns slightly to her brother. "They can stay over, right, oppa?"

Namjoon smiles indulgently at her. "Sure, bug." She turns back to the boys.

"I'm down," Hoseok replies with his bright smile. 

Jimin shrugs. "Sure, I'll just tell my mom I'm staying at Tae's." 

"Me too!" Kookie smiles as big Hobi. 

"Hyung?" Tae looks to his brother for approval, not knowing just how easy a decision it is for him to make.

Jin looks down at Y/n, her face full of hope that he'll say yes, too. "Yeah, sure. That's fine." He gives her a nervous smile back. "We'll just follow you home then."

>>

"When I agreed to watch a movie, I didn't agree to a scary movie," Hoseok complains as Namjoon hands him a bowl of popcorn.

"Hey, neither did I!" Jin concurrs from the other end of the couch. 

"But it's my birthday, my choice." 

"Yyyyyy/nnnn, I'm gonna scream like a little girl in front of our new friends," Hobi hisses. 

"Me too, Hobi," Jin groans as he looks over at the other boy. 

"Oh my goodness, you big babies. None of the other boys are complaining," Y/n sighs as she settles into the couch between them and takes Hobi's bowl of popcorn into her lap.

"They're braver than me. I'm secure enough to admit that," Jin tells her, stealing a handful of popcorn. 

"Well, I'm here and you can both hold my hands if you get scared. I'll protect you from the scary clown, okay?" She looks to the side to see the worried face of each boy.

"Fine," They both agree, to the laughter of everyone one else in the room, and both scoot in closer to their protector.

It isn't five minutes in before Hobi is grabbing Y/n around her waist and hiding his face behind her back. The action catches Seokjin’s attention, distracting him from the scary scene as he watches this strange intimacy with a mixture of endearment, amusement, and jealousy. He pulls Y/n's attention away from laughing at Hobi when he slips his hand into hers, locking their fingers together, and she looks over to roll her eyes playfully at him but gives him a squeeze of his hand. 

By the end of the movie, Hoseok has his arms and legs wrapped all the way around Y/n while Jin is holding onto her hand with both of his. She tries to shake them both loose but neither will budge. Namjoon, Taehyung and Jungkook have already fallen asleep around the room, their rest not at all encumbered by the scary movie. "Guys, it's time to go to sleep," she tells them, trying to pry Hobi’s arms from around her torso while removing her hand from Jin and failing at both. 

"No, you have to sleep with me," Hobi whines, tightening his grip. 

"I didn't agree to this." She continues to struggle, but it's as if Hobi is some form of boa constrictor and his hold only strengthens. 

"You did when you put on that movie. You knew the consequences. You know I can't sleep after movies like this."

"Jin, help," Y/n begs, pulling on his hand but he still refuses to let go. 

"No, I'm with Hobi. No sleep. What if Pennywise comes. We all have to stick together, and that means you, too," Jin reasons.

"What? The three of us are just gonna sleep on this couch together?"

Jin shrugs. "Works for me."

"I'm fine with that," Hobi agrees.

There's a laugh from several feet away that frightens all of them because they'd all forgotten Jimin was there. 

"You gonna help?" Y/n quirks an eyebrow.

"I mean, sure. I can join if you want. That's kinda freaky though," Jimin responds.

After another moment of struggling Y/n gives up all hope and surrenders. "How is this gonna work?" Y/n wonders with a resigned sigh. Jin looks around. They're sitting on a large L-shaped couch, and Tae has fallen asleep on the side already, but Jin manages to push him over a little and make room while Y/n struggles to lay down without getting Hoseok off her back. 

"Are you comfortable?" Jin asks, still holding onto her hand with one of his own.

"No," she grumbles with a backward glance to Hoseok. He sighs and loses his grip on her while still holding her in his arms.

"Better?"

"Yes."

"This is the weirdest thing I've ever seen," Jimin comments, watching the whole thing progress from his spot on the floor. "But I ship it."

>>

A/n: here ends Arc 1 of Bulletproof Heart. There will be an Arc 2 but I need to finish planning it and get a little head on the writing so I won't say for sure when it will start, but probably next week. What's next? Will she get closer with the Bulletproof boys? Will things improve with Namjoon? Who will she end up with? Is there any redemption for Yoongi?

Please let me know in the asks and comments what you think!! If you're enjoying this story so far it would mean a lot if you would reblog and like the master list.

Taglist is still open!! [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld   @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @hobizi

[sopebubbles]

❣twenty-seven: your bf Jimin?

Bulletproof Heart

Taglist is still open!! [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld    @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @hobizi @secretlycrazyhummingbird @lyra0cassiopeia @ventusnonexpectat @theestrangeddreamer

[sopebubbles]

❣twenty-one: three conditions

Bulletproof Heart

Taglist is still open!! [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @hobizi @secretlycrazyhummingbird

[sopebubbles]

A Bulletproof Christmas Special

This is just a little bit of Christmas fluff with our favorite babies bc I love them so much.

Bulletproof Heart master list

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The Kim siblings arrived outside Jungkook’s house laden with expensive presents they’d purchased with the emergency card, knowing that for their mother to really punish them she’d have to come home. But the sting of her absence wasn’t any greater today than any other day. They’d never been big on Christmas. Jungkook’s mother was a different story altogether. Many years ago she had become obsessed with western Christmas traditions, and there wasn’t a bit of the property that wasn’t decorated, starting with the inflatable Santa on the front yard and the brightly colored lights lining the roof. Y/n and Namjoon slowly approached the front door, careful of the ice from the snow that had begun to fall late the night before, leaving the city with a beautiful white Christmas. Namjoon knew Jungkook would already be itching for a snowball fight just like the ones they used to have with their dads when they were younger. They didn’t even have to ring the doorbell before Jungkook, who’d been watching for their arrival from the living room window, opened the door with a shining smile. 

“Merry Christmas!” he yelled happily as a wave of warm air, smelling of freshly baked cookies, wafted over them from inside. 

“Merry Christmas, Kookie,” Y/n smiled back over the stack of boxes in her arms, making her cousin giggle in response. 

“There are some in the kitchen,” Jungkook beamed as Y/n and Namjoon stepped over the threshold. 

“Where can we put these?” the eldest asked, gesturing to his own cargo.

“Under the tree in the living room!” The younger boy quickly closed the door to the cold and led them through the house they hadn’t been to in a few years. The small tree already had many presents underneath and the siblings tried to arrange their gifts alongside. Y/n set several boxes and bags to the side to take over to the Kim’s house next door later on. “Mom, they’re here!” Jungkook cheered when the woman appeared behind them. 

“I see, Kookie,” she smiled awkwardly. “I hope you guys are hungry. Lunch will be ready soon,” she announced before disappearing to the kitchen again. 

Jungkook shook a box that had his name on it. “What is it?” he asked with his wide, bright eyes looking up at Y/n.

“Why don’t you open it?” she suggested, folding herself down onto the floor across from him. 

“Okay! This one’s for you!” He shoved a flat rectangular gift into her hands before he began tearing at the paper on the box. “Oh my God!” Jungkook cried as he opened the box to find a personalized Bulls basketball jersey with his name on the back. “Jimin is gonna be so jealous.”

Y/n merely laughed, knowing another box in the room had the same thing for their friend. 

“Wait! Don’t open that!” Kook quickly snatched the gift back from Y/n. 

“What? Why, Kookie?” Y/n pouted. 

“It’s dumb,” he mumbled. 

“I’m sure it isn’t. Just let me have it.” Y/n held out her hand. Jungkook released a heavy sigh, but handed the item back. Y/n tore giddily into the paper, revealing a notebook with a stenciled heart on the cover. 

“I just noticed yours is almost full, so I thought you needed a new one,” Jungkook shrugged looking down at his lap.

“It’s perfect, Kookie. I love it. Thank you.”

After sitting through an awkward but quick lunch in which everyone tried their hardest not to mention Y/n's mom, Jungkook couldn't hold himself back anymore. 

"Let's go get Jin and Tae and have a snowball fight!" Jungkook suggested, still choking down his food.

Namjoon laughed appreciatively at his prediction coming true and nodded. "I'll call Yoongi."

"And I'll call Jimin!" Jungkook announced, already getting up from the table.

"And I guess I'll call Hobi," Y/n chuckled as the boys ran off leaving her with her aunt and uncle. "Thank you for lunch. Do you-"

"Go have fun," her uncle smiled. "We'll take care of all this."

"You kids be careful. And put on your coat! And gloves!" Jungkook's mom called as she heard her son running through the house. 

Y/n slipped on her coat and her boots before heading outside, barely avoiding Jungkook as he barreled out the door right behind her. On the side of the house they both scooped up a handful of snow and formed the ice into balls before simultaneously throwing them at Jin and Tae's lit windows. Jin was the first to appear. He pulled back the curtain with a fond smile as soon as he saw his girlfriend, and then disappeared. Tae looked out his window with a startled expression and then raced toward the front door. He came outside in his sweats with no coat, his feet haphazardly shoved into his tennis shoes.

"Hi, Taetae," Y/n greeted him softly with a hug. 

"Hey, Y/nie, what are you doing?" he asked as he wrapped his arms around her frame. 

"Oh, just saying hi," she mumbled into his chest. 

"Y/n, duck!" Jungkook called behind her and she instantly moved away before Tae had time to react, getting hit squarely in the chest with a packed ball of ice.

"Oh. And a snowball fight," she giggled.

"Jungkook, you brat! Just wait for me!" Tae screamed before running back into his house to put on proper clothes, bumping shoulders with Jin as he made his way out.

"Hey, sweetheart," Jin greeted with a smile as he approached his girlfriend. He reached for the end of her scarf and pulled her in for a soft kiss. 

"What were you doing?" She wondered casually when their lips parted.

"I was just studying," he shrugged in response.

"Sorry to interrupt."

Jin shook his head and pushed her hair away from her face. "I was just waiting for you, really. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, Jinnie," she replied quietly. "We've already called the others. Hobi should be here soon."

"Wanna wait inside while these idiots make popsicles of themselves?" Jin offered, tugging her toward the warmth of his house.

"Do you have hot chocolate?" she questioned as she let herself be led. 

"And marshmallows."

Jin and Y/n sipped patiently as shouts accompanied the arrival of Jimin some time later, but they didn't stir until Hobi entered the house. 

"Here you two are," he grinned, always pleased to find his girlfriend and his boyfriend together. "Everyone is here. They're all waiting for you."

"We can't come out until we get our kisses," Y/n pouted over her mug, drawing Hoseok closer with her words. He could taste the chocolate on her lips when he bent to kiss her, lingering a bit before he turned to kiss Jin as well. 

"Ready?" he asked after completing the task, and the other two nodded happily, zipping up their parkas to follow him outside. 

"I'm warning you all that pain and suffering will come to anyone who actually manages to hit me with a snowball," Yoongi announced as the group coalesced. 

"And that's why I demand to be on Yoongi's team," Namjoon added urgently, not wanting the temptation of going after his small boyfriend. 

"Then we want to be on a team together too!" Hobi decided for the three of them. 

"Me and Jimin will be on Namgi's team then," Jungkook concluded. 

Tae laughed. "It's team 'kissed Y/n' versus team 'secretly in love with my best friend.'"

"Well, technically-" Yoongi started before Namjoon placed a gloved hand over his mouth and pulled the boy to his chest as everyone else looked at Tae slack-jawed.

"Technically, you're my best friend," Jimin said accusingly at Taehyung. "Or at least you were, you absolute fuck."

Jin bent down to scoop up a handful of snow and slap it to the back of Taehyung's neck, causing him to scream. "Yah! What the fuck!"

"You can't go revealing people's secret crushes, you idiot!" Jin shook his head in disbelief. 

"Aw, fuck," Tae sighed, finally realizing what he'd done.

Meanwhile, Jungkook had turned as red as Santa's suit. "You have a crush on me?" he asked blankly to the boy beside him

Jimin turned to the younger boy with wide eyes and scratched the back of his neck. "Uh. Yeah."

For a moment Jungkook could only stare back at him, dumbfounded. "Seriously?!" he finally screeched. "I've had a crush on you forever!" For a moment everyone else could only share looks of shock and amusement at the sudden confessions, although most of them had suspected. 

"Great, so can we call this off and go inside? It's cold as fuck out here," Yoongi groaned, breaking the awkward silence.

"Good idea," Jin agreed. "We'll give you guys a minute to talk."

"I'll go grab your presents and meet you inside," Y/n cheered as she ran back into her aunt and uncle's house. Her brother followed behind to help.

"What's going on out there?" Hoseok wondered as the others all made themselves comfortable in the living room. 

"Last I saw, Jungkook had Jimin pinned against the side of his house and they were kissing," Namjoon informed the group as we walked in.

"That filthy muscle baby," Tae muttered as he hopped off the couch and went to his room to spy on them.

"What did you get me?" Hobi asked as Y/n settled on the floor in front of him. 

"Mostly some sweaters and stuff, but I have something special for both of you," Y/n smiled shyly as Jin joined the other boy on the couch. 

"What is it?" Jin wondered as she handed him a small flat box.

"I know our one year anniversary was last week, but I had to special order it so it was late," Y/n sighed. "It's okay if you don't want to wear it."

Jin opened the box to reveal a heart divided into three puzzle pieces, each one with an initial engraved on the front and a silver chain attached. Hobi was the one to reach for it with his long delicate fingers. 

"It's wonderful, babygirl. Of course I'll wear it," he smiled, holding the complete heart in his hands. It was almost a shame to take the pieces apart.

"I love it," Jin agreed and set the box aside to help Hoseok separate the pieces. He took the one engraved with an 'H' and secured it around the boy's neck. Then he reached down for Y/n's hand and pulled her to sit on the couch between them. Hobi gave her the piece bearing an 'S' before he moved her hair to adorn her with her own piece. Finally she fastened the necklace around the eldest and smiled, eyes watering slightly. 

"I love you guys," she said, trying to hold herself together. The two boys squished her between them in response, making her giggle. 

"Me, too."

"Me three."

Merry Christmas to all!!

@burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @taeshuworld    @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @cbgdoll @secretlycrazyhummingbird @theestrangeddreamer @softychimseok @binniebutter @betysotelo18 @thealmightyzah @joyfullyobsessed @twilight-loveer @wholockian1 @babycoffeefire @theatren3rd @dis-tru6tion @hey-itsmina

[sopebubbles]

❣three: look it up babyboy

Bulletproof Heart

What do you think of young Tae? Let me know in the comments or asks!

Taglist [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles

[sopebubbles]

❣thirty-two: a regular thing

Bulletproof Heart

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[sopebubbles]

❣twenty-nine: no party

Bulletproof Heart

Word count: 2.7k

Warnings: cursing, generalized pain, Namjoon not winning any awards for best brother here, sorry

>>

The group have settled into their movie--Ironman, per jungkook's request. Y/n can't help but feel nervous with the way her thigh is pressed against Jin's. The two keep trading glances, looking quickly away when the other catches them. Y/n would move an inch away, just to give herself room to breathe, but Hobi isn't giving her much room to work with as he's resting his head on her other thigh. The simple act of running her fingers through his hair is probably doing more to calm herself than him. Hoseok's attention is pulled away from the screen when his phone buzzes and he fishes it out of his pocket. After having a short conversation, Hoseok reluctantly tilts his phone screen up and gets Y/n's attention to show her. 

Y/n takes the device and reads the messages slowly before looking down into Hoseok's chocolate eyes. 

"We don't have to go. We can let them be someone else's problem." He already knows they're wasted words as soon as he speaks them. 

"No. I'm Joon's responsibility and he's mine. Let's go." Hobi sighs, not wanting to get up, not wanting to leave. For once, for just a little while everything had felt alright, felt normal. A quiet evening with friends who didn't require so much heavy lifting. Was that really too good to be true? He sits up reluctantly when Y/n moves her leg under his head. The sudden flurry of movement catches everyone else's attention. 

"Where are you going?" Jin anxiously pauses the movie. 

“Namjoon’s in trouble. We’re gonna go get him,” Y/n explains as Hobi goes to get their coats. 

“What kind of trouble?”

“Not sure exactly, but knowing them, it’s probably ugly.” Hobi holds up Y/n’s coat for her to slide her arms in before putting on his own. 

“I’ll come with you,” Jin says decidedly, searching for his phone and his shoes. 

“You don’t need to do that. We’ll handle them.” No one has said his name, but everyone knows who the true problem is. 

“I know you’re not asking for my help. But call it intuition...I think I should come.” Jin looks between both of their faces staring back at him before they look at each other and nod in agreement. 

“Do you want us to come, too?” Taehyung asks from his place on the floor. 

“No, you guys stay here. Finish the movie. We’ll call if we need you,” Jin instructs them as he slips into his coat. Then the three head out to Hobi’s car. 

As soon as they arrive, Hobi begins asking around about Namjoon's whereabouts, and is told he's out on the back porch, so the trio makes their way through the crowd to get to the porch through the kitchen.

"Namjoon, what the fuck happened to you?" Hoseok asks as soon as he sees his friend holding a bag of frozen vegetables to his face.

"Who did you fight?" Y/n demands.

"Dunno," Namjoon mumbles.

"You're lucky Doyoung gave you something to put on it and texted Hobi. Jesus fucking christ, I really can't leave you alone, can I? Where the fuck is Yoongi?"

"Y/n, you came! I knew you'd come." Yoongi stumbles from the doorway down the stairs to where Y/n is standing in front of her brother. He grabs her by the hips and pulls her close, pressing his body against hers. Hobi and Jin both look on with a mixture of anger and curiosity. What the hell is he doing exactly?

"Yoongi?" Y/n asks, her own confusion clear in her tone and her furrowed brows. 

"Listen, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I've been horrible to you. So horrible. Please don't reject me again. I'll be better I swear." One of Yoongi's hands moves from her hip to her neck and suddenly he's pulling her face even closer to hers. Y/n manages to push him away before their lips can meet and Yoongi stumbles back. Jin, who's closest, manages to catch his arm before he can fall, but only to grab him and shake him. 

"Yoongi, what the fuck is wrong with you?!" He shouts in the younger boy's face as his eyes glass over.

"Y/n, please. Why do you do this to me? Am I really not good enough?" Yoongi whines, just on the verge of tears, and suddenly all eyes are on Y/n, except for Namjoon’s, which can only stare at Yoongi.

"Y/n, what's he talking about?" Hoseok wonders but before she can answer Namjoon is on his feet, coming between them.

"Did something happen between you two?" Namjoon demands in his loud voice.

"No, Joonie oppa. He's drunk. Just like he's always drunk! He- he never meant it. He's always drunk! And I stopped him!" Y/n can't help the tears coming from her eyes.

Namjoon turns to the other boy, who's looking down shamefully. "This is it? You like my sister?"

"I'm sorry, Joon," Yoongi manages to mumble.

Namjoon looks back down on his sister again. "Why do you have to take everything away from me? Mom and dad are gone because of you. You took hoseok from me, too. And now Yoongi? Why is it always you?!" 

"What the fuck, Namjoon?" Hoseok pushes Namjoon away from her, out of her face. He's utterly stunned by the other boy's words and how quickly everything has fallen apart. 

"I can't fucking stand you. I wish you were never born!" Namjoon yells over Hobi.

"Namjoon, shut up! Think about what you're saying," Hobi urges him, but Namjoon hears none of it.

"Oppa, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for any of it to happen. I'm sorry." At the sight of Y/n's freely flowing tears Jin releases Yoongi so that he can take her in his arms, shielding her from her brother. 

"And you," Namjoon turns to Yoongi. "All these fucking years I've been in love with you! And you were in love with my sister. How is that even fucking possible?" 

"Namjoon, I-I'm sorry. I didn't want to be. I swear I didn't want to. I made it so I wouldn't be!" Yoongi tries to defend himself.

"Hobi, take me home. Now. And I don't wanna see your fuckin face there, Y/n. Go wherever the fuck it is you go when you don't come home because I never want to see you again." Namjoon walks past her and back into the house, through the crowd that came to see what the yelling was about.

"Oppa, no," Y/n sobs into Jin’s chest, knowing her brother can't hear her pleas.

"Y/n-"

"No, Hobi. You heard him. Take him home. You're the only person that can be there for him right now."

"But-" 

"I'll be fine." Y/n hides her face further in Jin's chest and his arms tighten around her automatically.

"I'll take her back to mine," Jin assures Hoseok, who lets his hands fall uselessly at his sides before he follows Namjoon back inside, thankful that Jin had insisted on coming.

"Y/n, I'm sorry," Yoongi starts again. But Jin cuts him off.

"Not now, Yoongi. Just go home." Jin is still clutching Y/n to his chest, trying to shield her from everyone as the crowd starts to disperse.

"How the fuck am I supposed go get home?" Yoongi slurs.

"It's like, two blocks from here, dumb ass." Jin nods his head in the right direction. 

"Fuck," Yoongi mutters to himself as he stumbles toward the house. 

Jin lets out a heavy sigh and lowers his head so that his lips are right next to Y/n's ear. "Goddamnit. He's gonna get himself killed."

Y/n turns her head to see Yoongi trip up the steps and releases her own sigh. "Yeah, maybe we should help him?"

"I think, maybe help is a strong word. Maybe we could just like, follow him at a distance and make sure he doesn't walk into traffic." Y/n snorts and nods her head. Trying to wipe her tears before going to face everyone that's inside. She's so goddamn tired of everyone seeing her drama. "He's moving pretty slow. We can probably give him a head start," Jin assured her, eliciting a small laugh. 

When she's ready and Yoongi has made his way inside, Jin takes her hand and leads her in, allowing her to keep her head down as she stays close to him. She does her best to ignore the whispers about her and them as they push through, and Jin gives her hand reassuring squeezes. Out on the sidewalk in front of the house again, Yoongi wonders which way to go. 

"Left," Jin calls out to him. "Your other left. Yoongi never did have a good sense of direction," he whispers to Y/n after watching the boy go to the right and then turn in the correct direction. Jin continues to try to make jokes to lighten Y/n's mood as they follow Yoongi home. He knows it can't erase what's happened tonight, but at least she can maybe hold it together until they can get to a safe place, until they get home and he can hold her and let her cry if that's what she needs.

"You know, it's really rude to follow me and flirt the whole time," Yoongi says abruptly, walking backward until his shoe catches on a section of concrete that's raised. The pair stop and let him steady himself.

"Yeah, well you're an asshole, so no one really cares," Jin calls back to him when he turns around. 

"That's a fair point," Yoongi replies over his shoulder. 

As they approach his house, Yoongi turns one too early, walking almost all the way to his neighbor's door.

"Shit. I better go stop him. Wait for me," Jin tells her, releasing her hand for the first time their whole walk. "That's not your house, Yoongi," Jin informs him, leading the drunk boy back down the sidewalk with his hand on his shoulder. 

"So you two are together now?" Yoongi wonders.

"It's really none of your business. What the hell are you thinking? I mean, honestly. What goes through your mind with the way you treat her?" They're standing in front of Yoongi's door now and he leans back against the wall of the alcove where no one can see them so he can fish his keys out of his pocket.

"It's really none of your business," Yoongi mocks, handing his keys over for Jin to unlock the door. "But it's complicated." Jin's steady hands unlock the door with ease, but he turns to face Yoongi before he'll let him inside. He puts his hand on his chest to hold him against the wall

"Listen, asshole. Nothing, I mean nothing, gives you the right to treat anyone like you treat her, and I'm not going to let you do it anymore. You're hurting every single person around you, but most of all yourself. Clean yourself up and control your fucking mouth, or you really are going to end up alone with no one but yourself to blame." Jin removes his hand from Yoongi and places the key in his hand before he turns the knob and lets the door swing open with a squeak. "Goodnight, Yoongi."

Yoongi gives Jin a knock with his shoulder as he passes to go inside, and Jin is already half way down the sidewalk before he hears the door close.

"Now I guess we call Jimin." Jin forces a smile, grateful that one of his friends has a driver's license. 

"You don't have to take me to your place, Jinnie oppa," Y/n tells him, knowing her house is only a few more blocks away now, but also that she wouldn't dare to set foot there tonight. 

"And find out you slept on the street? No way." Jin lifts his phone to his ear and tells Jimin where to find them. Y/n goes to sit on the curb in front of Yoongi's house and waits for him to join her. 

"Do you mind if I ask what happened between you and Yoongi?" Jin asks after a minute of silence has passed while they sit.

Y/n sighs and closes her eyes. "It only happened once, when I brought the boys home from a party. Namjoon had gone to his room and Hobi went to my bed. I put Yoongi on the couch and he pulled me down with him, pulled me under him and started to kiss me. And I kinda let it happen at first. Cause I liked him, you know? But I didn't like how it felt because it seemed like he thought I was just one of his hookups. Like he didn't manage to find anyone that night so he was settling for me. So I had to get away from him and went to my room and slept in my bed with Hobi. I just...for a moment I wished he'd try it sober because it made me feel like he didn't really want me, he just wanted somebody. But then, I don't think I would have let it happen sober either."

Jin hums curiously. "Why not? I thought you liked him?" 

"I did," she laughs ironically. "But by then I had already realized Joon was in love with him. And I would never do that to him. I always knew nothing was meant to happen between me and Yoongi. I just had to get over my feelings."

Jin nods his understanding. "But wait, so that was your first kiss?" 

Y/n nods. "It was last summer and he was the only one I kissed before…"

"Before Tae?" Y/n nods again. "Well, that sucks."

"What do you mean?"

"Just that you've never had a real genuine kiss. That seems unfair."

Y/n shrugs. "I'm sure it will happen someday." 

There's a moment, a shared look, but Jin decides to let it pass. He's not going to kiss her now, outside Min Yoongi's house after a traumatic night. He's going to kiss her when it's just about them and how much they like each other. That's the only way for it to be genuine. A few more minutes pass quietly before Jimin and Tae arrive. 

"Everything okay?" Tae asks as the two climb into the back seat. 

"What do you think?" Jin mumbles, buckling himself in before Y/n curls herself into his side, under the protection of his arm without asking and without any hesitation. She invites his warmth as he pulls her closer, allowing herself to be comforted, to admit that she needs it. It's getting easier with him and she's fully aware of it even if she won't say so out loud. 

When they get to his bedroom he hands her some of his clothes and she goes to the bathroom to change, wash her face and rinse her mouth with mouthwash because it's better than nothing. When she comes back Jin has already changed. 

"I'll-" He's about to suggest taking the couch and she knows it, but she reaches her hand out to grab his arm before he can leave.

"Can you sleep with me? I don't know if I'll be able to fall asleep otherwise." Her voice is small, frightened. 

Jin's going to ask if she's sure, but she's already asked and he knows that's not a small thing for her. She wouldn't have managed to if she didn't want it, if she didn't feel she absolutely needed it, and he's satisfied with that. "Just let me brush my teeth. I'll be right back." He nods. 

While he's gone she has time to text Hobi. 

"Didn't know if you would prefer outside or inside," Y/n says softly when Jin returns. She's sitting on the edge of his bed, waiting. 

"Outside please." Y/n scoots back toward the wall and lays on her side facing outward, watching Jin as he turns off the light and comes to lay down with her. She settles easily into his arms before she speaks.

"Are you sure this is okay? I don't want you to be uncomfortable." She's caught on to how important consent is to him and she realizes that goes both ways.

"Not uncomfortable at all, Y/nie," he assures her, holding her closer to prove a point.

"Is it bad I find this place so comforting?" She's referring to his home but also to being with him.

He shakes his head subtly, his lips brushing the skin of her forehead. "Not at all. I hope you'll always feel safe here."

"You're always there for me," she whispers, closing her eyes. 

"I hope I always will be," he whispers back, giving her a kiss on the forehead before she tucks her head under his chin, lulled to sleep already by the comfort of his embrace.

>>

Taglist is still open!! [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld    @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @hobizi @secretlycrazyhummingbird @lyra0cassiopeia @ventusnonexpectat @theestrangeddreamer @softychimseok

[sopebubbles]

❣nineteen: don't be nervous

Bulletproof Heart

I've waited a while for a moment to say // I don't owe you a goddamn thing [nightmare by halsey]

Taglist [ask or comment to be added]: @burningupp-replies @halesandy @jikooksgirl19 @lilacdreams-00 @loveyoongles @yoongiofmine @thequeen-kat @renhold-nightspear @xxlovingfandomsxx @disregard-thefootsteps @taeshuworld   @abc-abc1234-a @becomingbts @xianav @kim-jias-den @deleteidentity @r4yih @somelazysundays @lyra0cassiopeia