#but i also pity pro athletes in a way when it comes to this stuff bc they're so obsessed with winning

[umflowers]

re: lewis' comments about qatar, please remember this is a man known for being exceptionally thoughtful about his actions and how they impact others, who nonetheless posts pictures of his very sculpted professional athlete's body, pinching the literal skin on his stomach with captions about how it's stubborn fat that he can't seem to exercise off. professional athletes do not view their bodies as bodies, which deserve care and concern. they view their bodies as the key to their high performance and ability to win, which they are addicted to. it quite literally doesn't occur to them to slow down and recognize what the body needs to be healthy. no professional athlete should be trusted with their own safety.

[venusiangguk]

gold rush pt. 3 | jjk (m)

>>pairing: jungkook x reader

>>genre: pwp, v little plot, smut, kinda fluffy, college au (kinda), established relationship

>>word count: 9.9k um?

>>warnings: pegging!!!, butt stuff!!!, sexy anal!!!, sub jk, soft dom oc, crying why do i always make everyone cry, fingering (m), strap on, dildos, vibrators, sex toys, sex shop adventures, explicit sex, like so explicit this bitch is basically 10k, mutual masturbation, coming untouched, kisses, aftercare in the form of snacks, titty squeezing, dirty talk, excessive use of pet names, yoongi exists

>>notes: i wasn’t gonna write this bc ur girl does not know the first thing about pegging, but jk sucking the strap came to me in a dream and i had to do it. it was highly requested so i hope u like it! i wrote and poorly edited this whole thing today so im sorry for any mistakes !! 

>>summary: jk wants the strap, and jk gets what he wants !!

pt.1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3

The sun is shining, and there’s just the perfect amount of breeze to cool Jeongguk as sweat runs down his temple. The soccer pitch just got cut, making the ball much easier to control, and therefore much easier to aim at Jimin’s ass. It’s cool-down time, so the team is in groups of three, idly kicking the ball between each other, for the last few minutes of practice. All in all, a great day to talk about getting pegged with his best friends.

Jeongguk glances around the field, making sure the other groups are far enough away from him and his friends before clearing his throat. “So… do you guys like… get pegged?”

When Taehyung passes the ball to Jimin, Jimin completely misses it due to the fact that he is looking at Jeongguk like he is the most pitiful human on the planet. Jeongguk adjusts his shin guard to avoid the scrutiny.

“Gguk… honey… are you dumb?”

Taehyung’s jogging back after retrieving the ball that ran astray. “No, Mini. He’s straight.” He kicks the ball to Jeongguk. “If by ‘pegged’ you mean fucked in the ass by a real dick, then yeah. We do.”

Jeongguk receives the ball with a ‘rainbow’ and juggles it from his thigh to his laces, balancing the ball for a second before kicking it to Jimin. He nods, contemplative. “Nice.”

“Okay ace.” He passes to Taehyung, before throwing Jeongguk a teasing look. “You thinking about taking it up the ass, Gukkie?”

“Perhaps I’m contemplating.” He sniffs nose in the air.

Taehyung laughs. “Got your button milked once and now you wanna take a phallic shaped object? Proud of you.” He places his hand over his heart, like the mere thought of Jeongguk getting railed makes his heart warm.

A whistle blows, and Jeongguk kicks the ball up to his arm, tucking it into the curve of his trim waist. “Why does everyone call it a button? And it hasn’t only been once.” He sounds exasperated and so so tired.

His friends jog to bump shoulders with him as they make their way to the locker rooms. “Hey, jokes aside, I think it’s cool you’re like comfortable enough, or whatever, with __ to explore the things you like.” Taehyung says.

Jeongguk rolls his eyes. “Okay Dad.”

“No seriously!” Jimin insists, holding the locker room door open for them. Fuck the rest of the team. “She seems good for you. Babys you like you need.” Jimin laughs.

Jeongguk’s shirt gets caught on his head as he squawks. “I don’t just like being babied, fuck you.”

“Okay so she also entertains your sadistic side. She’s the full package.”

Jeongguk looks down with a blush. He shrugs his shoulders lightly before bending over to get out of his gear. “She’s pretty cool I guess.”

Taehyung knees him while he’s still bent over making him stumble a bit. “Awe, Jeonggukkie is in love.”

“Shut up.” Jeongguk smacks him in the face with his smelly sock.

“When you gonna do it?” Jimin asks, buttoning his new pants. 

Apparently they aren’t showering today. Jeongguk will just have to stop at his dorm before heading to yours to help you study. That reminds him that you have a test on Friday, but are free this weekend. He just so happens to be free as well. The team they were supposed to play had to forfeit because their coach got caught sleeping with one of the cheerleaders. Sucks, but good for Jeongguk and his little asshole.

“Maybe this weekend.” With their backpacks on, they start the trek back to the dorms. It’s nearing night now, the sun just starting to set in the sky. Jeongguk pulls out his phone to tell you he’s stopping by his place before heading to you. You reply quickly.

baby🥺💘😏🧠🙄👊🏻:

okie

wanna have sex instead of helping me study 

me:

yeah but im not gonna 

just think about how good the sex will be when u get an a 

baby🥺💘😏🧠🙄👊🏻:

🙄

When Jeongguk pockets his phone, Taehyung speaks up.

“You think she’ll be down?”

Jeongguk doesn’t hesitate. “Yeah, probably.”

Ever since the first time you made him cum untouched, butt stuff has been a moderately regular occurrence for you both as a long-term, healthy, pro-ass eating couple. Honestly it was mostly him getting his butt played with, but he supposed it made sense. Like Jimin explained to his once naïve self, it was just biological- or something. Whatever. He wonders if three fingers will be enough to fit a fake dick in his ass. He asks his friends.

“Eh…” Jimin starts, looking up like he’s thinking. “Maybe, but you might wanna try to get to four, maybe five if you're using hers, since she’s tiny.”

Jeongguk’s mouth falls open and he pales. Taehyung notices and laughs.

“Don’t get scared. It’s just better to over-prep than under-prep. And like obviously you work up to it, she’s not just gonna shove her fist or her cock up your ass.”

Her cock. A little tingle settles in Jeongguk’s lower belly at the statement. He’s been thinking about this for a while, looking at porn in his free time. Seeing the way the guys moan on their girls’ strap always gets him hard. Seeing how hard their cocks get when the toy hits them just right. He throbs when he sees the guys cum just from the strap, no hands. Maybe he should fuck you when he gets to your dorm instead of helping you study. His cock is feeling a little plump.

“Alright well… Bye, thanks for being gay and answering my anal questions!”

As he’s pressing the button to his elevator, they lived on opposite sides of the athlete dorm and there were different elevators for each of the wings, Jimin chirps, “Don’t forget to empty your asshole really well, and don’t eat the day of! Also buy extra lube and put a spare blanket down!”

Jeongguk winces. Valuable information indeed, information he mentally pockets, but did he need to yell it in the dorm common room?

“Noted!” He yells back at the elevator dings and opens up. Jeongguk pretends like he doesn’t meet the curious, kind of confused gaze of one of his teammates. He must have walked in while Jimin was yelling and only caught the end of the conversation while waiting for the same elevator. Jeongguk gets in and immediately closes the doors. He can catch the next lift.

~~~

Jeongguk’s got his head in your lap and you’re running your fingers through his long, silky hair. He showered today, so waves of his aromatherapy lavender shampoo are wafting up to you. Sweet boy. He seems sidetracked, occasionally sighing and subtly twisting, but is still more or less purring on your thigh, feet tucked up onto the cushion of the couch. Netflix is on the small tv that was left by the last person who lived there, you’re mac book connected via HDMI. You’re not really paying attention. Mind kind of tired from all the studying you had done this week. Jeongguk fidgets a tiny bit again, wiggling like he’s trying to get comfortable. He huffs a sigh.

“Hey,” You say softly, getting his attention.

His body curves at the waist, causing his t-shirt to bunch up and show off the dip of his hip bone. He looks up at you with wide eyes. He seems surprisingly awake. Must have some busy little bees buzzing around his mind. He makes a little questioning noise.

“You okay? You’re kinda fussy.” You murmur.

He groans. “I-  am just thinking.”

“About?” You drag the word out in a singsong-y manner.

The way Jeongguk’s face flushes is so pretty, you have to stop yourself from cooing. 

He moves himself from your lap and sits facing you. He looks like he's thinking about what to say, or how to say what he’s thinking so hard about. 

Eloquently he states, “I’m horny.”

You glance at his cock. Not quite hard, but a little happy and excited. You chuckle, leaning towards him, giving him a playfully sexy look. “Okay, let’s fuck baby.”

Jeongguk blushes even more, cheeks tinted red, while he leans away from you.

You pout. “What?”

Again he pauses, a small pout on his lips. He seems to be in a soft, needy, difficult mood. You’re probably going to have to pry what he wants to say out of his mouth.

With another uncalled for exasperated huff, Jeongguk rolls his eyes and moves closer to you before catching you by surprise and swinging a leg over your lap. He’s facing you while he straddles your thighs. His arms are looped around your neck, he’s playing with a little bit of your hair, twirling the long length around his fingers. You smile up at him, gently. Your palms squeeze at his narrow hips encouragingly.

“I want to try something new…” He says. He sounds nervous and looks at you the same.

“Mhmm.” You say, fighting a smile. 

“Really bad. Like I want it really bad.” His hips roll, probably unconsciously from the way he closes his eyes to ground himself. 

You peek at his lap, and his cock is bulging, the fabric of his sweatpants doing nothing to help hide it. You bring your hand to it, and massage him through his pants.

He whines and pushes against your palm before a hand comes down and grabs your wrist, stopping the movement. “Quit it, I’m trying to talk.” He’s so petulant and whiny.

You move your hand away and place it back on his hip, giggling a little. “Well spit it out, then.”

He scowls. You reach up and smooth the wrinkle in his brow before trailing it down and cupping his cheek. He softens immediately, melts like butter in your hands. His eyes close and he lets out a soft sigh, body relaxing a little.

He’s whispering, kinda giggling out of embarrassment, when he says, “I want you to fuck me.” He pauses, peeking at you through his lashes. “Like for real.”

Almost instantly a little spark ignites in your belly, and you feel your pussy get that telltale heartbeat. You didn’t want to push Jeongguk into anything, but you’ve been thinking about taking the ‘next step’ with your… ass-plorations for some time. But you figured he would get to the same point on his own, and would come to you when he was ready. Turns out you know him as well as you thought you did.

“Yeah?” You rub your free hand up his side. 

He nods quickly, eagerly. You pinch his cheek lightly, and he retaliates by trying to bite at it. To avoid the attack it finds his way back to his waist.

“When did you want to? Tonight?”

He wiggles impossibly closer to you. Kisses you quick before nodding again. “Yeah. I um. I already like prepped… mostly. I prepped what I could by myself.” He pauses with a cute thinking face. “You will probably have to help me a little. But yeah. I got ready for you just in case.” He nods.

You hum, glancing at the old clock on the wall, another gift from the prior tenant. 11:52 pm. 

“If we hurry, we can make it to a sex shop? They don’t usually close until 2 or 3 in the morning.” You suggest.

Jeongguk bites his lip, smiling excitedly. “Really? Can we?”

You roll your eyes playfully. “Yeah, duh.” You lean up and give him a speedy, but thorough kiss, smiling into it. “Been wanting to peg you for so long.” 

His face scrunches endearingly. “Don’t call it that.”

He hops off your lap, and goes to grab the keys, wasting no time. He stands by the door expectantly. His cock is, extremely obviously, sticking out. Someone didn’t wear his briefs today.

“Can you like… kill that?” You’re laughing as you tug on some sweats of your own, having only been lounging in your panties and one of his shirts. Your usual at home attire.

He looks down, and has a smug grin on his face when he looks at you again. “It’ll go down in the car. Hurry up!”

~~~

A dildo looks so much bigger when one is looking at it knowing that it will be inside of them within the next few hours. And there are so many options and colors. Some vibrate, some have fake pubic hair on them. Some have balls that are squishy and feel eerily… accurate.

Jeongguk isn’t having second thoughts, no. But he is having thoughts. Very overwhelming thoughts. 

You’re next to your boyfriend, glancing between him and the varying selection of fake cocks displayed in front of you both, trying to gauge his reaction. He looks a little pale, but tentatively excited. Curious at the very least.

“Which one do you want?” You ask.

“No idea.” He responds, eyes wide.

Like most store clerks, one shows up, almost like they have a built in ‘customer needs help and has no idea which dildo to get to peg her super hot boyfriend’ radar. 

“You guys need help?” He is a small man, with a monotone voice. He looks like he would rather be anywhere else at 12:30am on a Saturday night. 

“NO!” Jeongguk says quickly and loudly. Very loudly.

Both you and the store clerk flinch, looking at him shocked.

Jeongguk shifts on his feet. “No.” He says in a more socially acceptable tone. “No- I’m sorry. But we’re uh-” He grabs your arm and pulls you closer. “We’re good, thanks.”

The clerk looks between you and Jeongguk and the dildos. “Um… Alright.” He starts to walk away before he turns back around. “Well if you change your mind, I’m Yoongi and I’ll be at the counter. If your toy is electric I’ll test it in the back before you leave… We uh- provide batteries with your purchase if needed…” With one last glance, a very judgmental one in Jeongguk’s opinion, Yoongi takes his place at said counter. His eyes flicker to you guys every once in a while.

“Baby,” You grab Jeongguk’s face between your palms and make him look at you. You squeeze and his lips poke out making him look like a guppy. He blinks. “I know you’re nervous, but it’s going to be okay.”

He rolls his eyes, guppy face and all. “Well obviously. I just- We don’t need help.” He wiggles out of your grip, much like a… guppy.

You grin, trying not to laugh, and just be the supportive girlfriend you are. “Okay, did you decide which one you want?”

A side glance. “Not yet…”

You walk up and go to grab a pink sparkly one.

“Uh, not that one.”

You quirk an eyebrow and move your hand to a larger one.

“No.”

You play a little game of dildo hot or cold until you have a better idea of what Jeongguk wants. His preference seems to be skin tone, close to his own, with a more realistic feel. Normal balls though, not squishy. Also no faux hair. You thank him for that. If you actually had a penis it would surely be waxed. Bless Jeongguk for doing the same. As for size, he leaned more towards a very normal, moderate size. Maybe 5 or 6 inches at most, not too thick. Smaller than himself. One last option.

“Do you want it to vibrate?” You ask, holding one in your hand testing the numerous different settings.

He shakes his head, answering quick. “No.”

He pauses.

“Wait.” He thinks. “Maybe. Should we? You could use it too?” 

Sweet, kind, considerate angel. Always thinking about you and your pleasure. Couples who share the strap last the longest.

You shrug, pointing out, “I could use one that doesn’t vibrate too.”

He looks offended and sounds snotty. “Uh, you don’t need to.”

“Whatever. Why don’t we get both?”

You had a point. He pretends to ponder it, before nodding, already persuaded. “Okay.” 

“We need the harness now.”

You begin the harness hunt, walking through the store, coming across many a things, but for some reason you both keep missing them. They’re nowhere to be found. 

“Maybe they’re sold out?” He tries.

“Doubt it. Let’s go ask.” You grab him by his pinky and try to drag him to the counter. He resists. 

“Let’s not.”

“Koo.” You say giving him a look.

He whines, throwing his head back. Borderline throwing a fit. You hold your ground, smiling.

He’s easy to give in. Being a brat just on principle. “Fine but you’re talking.”

You stand on your tiptoes and kiss his cheek. “Of course, baby.” With his pinky in hand, you make your way to the counter.

The store clerk, Yoongi, if you remember correctly, is sitting behind the counter hunched over smiling at his phone. He doesn’t seem to notice you’re there.

You clear your throat gently, “Excuse me?”

Yoongi jumps, almost throwing his phone. “Fuck!” He exclaims. His fists come up ready to fight before he sees it’s you and Jeongguk. He then places his hand over his heart. “Shit, you scared me.” He chuckles, recovering quickly. “How can I help you?”

You stare at him for a moment longer before speaking up. “Um yeah, I was just wondering where your harnesses are?”

He leans on the counter, head in his hand looking kinda bored. “Hanresses? What kind? Hanging harness? Body harness?”

You glance at Jeongguk and he looks like he’s going to die.

“The um- strap on harnesses?” Your voice goes to a whisper when you say it, despite it just being you guys in the store.

Yoongi sits up, and looks at you, and then looks at Jeongguk. A look of understanding comes over his face along with an amused smile. He nods to himself, while getting up to help you. “Nice. Follow me.”

Jeongguk gapes at the ‘nice’ and looks at you in disbelief. You pat his butt telling him to get going. 

With some help from Yoongi you pick out a harness that looks supportive and comfortable, the ring that holds the dildo, compatible with both the ones that you plan on getting. It’s a simple adjustable black one. Yoongi recommended wearing something under it if the straps dig into you and irritate. He seems bored, but he’s actually very good at his job, and very knowledgeable.  

Finally you’re at the counter. You place all the items in Yoongi’s reach and he’s just about to tell you the total when Jeongguk perks up.

“Wait!” He says before scurrying off.

It’s quiet for a split second. Before the clerk speaks up.

“He’s cute.”

You smile, “Thanks, he’s mine.”

Yoongi laughs, small little fish teeth and gums on display. Must be a Pisces. You know Pisces teeth. “Does he have any cute friends?”

You nod. “Yeah, but they are dating.”

He shrugs. “Don’t care.”

“Uh… I can give you their Instagrams?”

He pulls out his phone, and follows them right there after a quick glance at their pages. Confidence is nice.

There’s a short lull in the conversation. And Jeongguk seems to be taking his sweet time getting something you guys must have forgotten. Or the poor things lost. It’s a big store. You speak up this time.

“Do you have like a manager I could leave a review for? You were really helpful, and seemed like you really knew what you were talking about.”

He shakes his head. “Nah, I own the place. You think I would be here on a Saturday night if it wasn’t obligatory? Thanks, though.”

“Oh.” You say. That was pretty impressive. The store was quite successful based on the reviews. You would make sure to let Jimin and Taehyung know Yoongi was a business man.

“Okay, I’m back.” Jeongguk announces. “Sorry I forgot where it was.”

He places 2 (two) large bottles of lube on the counter. You cough out a laugh.

“Baby, we have lube at home.”

“But do we have enough?”

“I think maybe one more would be more than enough.”

He ignores you, looking Yoongi in the eyes for the first time tonight. “Add both please.”

Yoongi nods, looking a little scared of Jeongguk’s seriousness, and does as he’s ordered.

After Jeongguk pays, and you both are making your way to the exit, Yoongi calls out, “Good luck, tell your friends to follow me back!”

“Uh- Okay?” Jeongguk yells back. When you’re in the parking lot, he asks, “What the heck was that about?”

You shake your head, laughing to yourself. “Don’t worry about it.”

~~~

As soon as you get back to your dorm, the atmosphere is thick, full of tension and nervous anticipation. Jeongguk’s fidgety, eager to get started. You’re not far off, but contain yourself a little more. Need to keep control of the situation in case Jeongguk gets deep into his mood.

You guys are in the bathroom now, each one washing a toy before you use it. You make sure to unwrap the harness and the lube as well, both at Jeongguk’s insistent request, ensuring you don’t have to stop and deal with it later. 

“Let’s just get undressed in here, it’s where my hamper is.” You say already tugging your shirt over your head, tits bouncing freely. Jeongguk went without briefs today, and you went without a bra.

Jeongguk quietly follows suit, and you don’t miss the way his hands are trembling a little in anticipation. When you’re both naked he kisses you quickly, and jiggles your boobs a little just because they are there and because he can, before saying, “Okay, lets go.” He’s out the bathroom before you can even respond. You laugh to yourself and gather the stuff he forgot in his excitement.

When you walk out with your hands full, you see Jeongguk spreading out a blanket over your comforter.

“Whatcha doin?” You ask curiously, placing the items on the nightstand.

“Gets messy. Wanna save your bedding.” He states.

You squawk, grabbing the blanket he set up on your bed. “Not my baby blanket you monster.”

He laughs, abs tensing. You notice he’s already hanging a little heavy between his thighs. “Sorry. Was the first one I saw.” He walks over to the couch and replaces the blanket that’s hanging over the back with your baby blanket and resets up. “Better?” he asks, extended his arm towards your bed to show off his work.

You nod, and take the few steps needed to close the space between you both. Your hand runs down his belly, and you feel his muscles jump, and you see little goosebumps sprout all over. His hands come up to cup your tits. You kiss softly where his heart is. You look up at him.

“I love you.” You smile.

He blushes. “Love you.” He whispers, before he leans down and slots your lips together.

It’s eager from the start. Your bodies press together, as your hands roam. When he takes a breath and surges back in, your teeth click together is his haste, before his tongue slips into your mouth. He groans into you, his hand going down to cup your ass, squeezing and pulling you impossibly closer. 

You feel his cock against your belly, almost fully hard already. You reach down to wrap a hand around him, wanting to help him get there before you get started. He hisses, thrusting forward instinctively before pulling away. He looks like he hates that he does.

“No- I,” He’s already short of breath, chest rising and falling a little bit faster than normal. “I wanna watch you cum. With the toy.” He reaches around you, grabbing the vibrating dildo. “Please?” He asks. His eyes are fervent.

You take the toy in your hand, and kiss him again softly. “Yeah, baby. Whatever you. It’s all about you tonight.”

He shakes his head. “Always about you too.” 

Your heart beats, happy in your chest. You thought about it earlier in the night, but Jeongguk really was the best lover. He always, always made sure you were taken care of, before, during, and after sex. He was so vocal and communicative, genuinely wanting you to know it was always about both of you, even if one was receiving more attention. He was caring like that in and out of the bedroom. You were so lucky to be his.

“You’re too good to me,” You laugh, climbing onto the bed. You settle back against your pillows, propping some behind you so you can see him, and watch him while you get off. He takes his place in front of you, looking at you expectantly.

He’s impatient, placing his hands on your knees, spreading you open so he can see your cunt. You let him get you into position before saying, “Keep your hands to yourself now, okay?”

He nods, eyes never leaving your pussy. He licks his lips. “Okay.” It’s said in a distracted kind of far away tone.

You hum as you bring the toy to your mouth, getting it wet. You wouldn’t need any lube, you would be dripping in no time. You don’t waste any time putting your free hand down between your legs and spreading your pussy lips, so your clit and the pretty pink center of your cunt are displayed for Jeongguk. You glance at him through your lashes, when you hear a small gasp fall from his lips. He’s already got a hand around himself. Just the tips of his fingers stroking his length, at a leisurely pace. 

“She’s so pretty… You’re so pretty.” His eye flick to your face before zeroing in on your center again.

“Tell me how to do it baby. Tell me what you want to see.” You say, voice salacious and soft. You circle your finger slowly around your nub, dipping inside just a bit to spread your slick around.

When he swallows, it’s audible, his Adam's apple jumping. “I want you to turn it on low, and put it on your clit. I want you to feel good.”

You smile, and drag the tip of it down your body to just above your clit, turning it on the lowest setting before making contact with your sensitive nub. Your legs jolt, almost closing when you feel the vibrations. Even the lowest setting was strong. Your head falls back, and your legs spread more for him once you get used to the strength of the toy. “Fuck…” You breathe.

“Does it feel good?” He asks, greedy for your pleasure.

You nod, eyes still closed, focusing. You move the vibrator in small circles over your clit. You can hear Jeongguk’s breaths speed up.

“Turn it up.” His voice gives away that he’s speeded up his hand on his cock too.

You do as he says, looking at him as you do. He’s sin personified. He’s on his knees, sitting back on his feet, so his thighs are flexed and bulging. His abs tense when his palm twists under the crown of his cock. His eyes almost look black, pupils blown so wide, lust taking over his face. He’s got his plump bottom lip drawn between his teeth. He looks up from your pussy and catches you staring. He smiles shyly.

You keep your eyes on him as you bring the toy back down to your core. A short high pitched moan falls from your lips, as your brows knit together, before your eyes roll back. He groans, your expression enough to make his cock start to leak.

“Feels so good, Jeongguk.” You moan. The vibrator is right where it feels best, pulsing against your clit, causing pleasure to bleed into your veins. 

“Yeah, baby?” He asks, he’s breathless, sounds like he’s in love. With you, your cunt. “Tell me.”

“‘S just right Koo, could make me cum just like this…” 

He curses, and you open your eyes just in time to see him grip the base of his cock, keeping himself in check. “Not yet, baby. Little longer, please.” Still so polite and good for you, even when he’s the one telling you what to do.

He has you keep the vibe there, for a while longer, right in the spot that’s gonna make you lose it. He watches as a tiny clear drop leaks from you pink little pussy. It looks like it’s heavy and about to drip down to the blanket under you. He doesn’t notice your legs shaking until you’re gasping, “Koo, I’m almost- I’m gonna-”

“No!” He says quickly, his hand reaches out to pull the vibrator from your cunt just before you get your high. Your pussy aches and throbs, wanting to cum so bad. 

Your chest is heaving when you ask, “Are… are you edging me?”

He shakes his head, even though your eyes are closed, trying to catch your breath. “No, no! I just. I got distracted.” He looks at that small drop of slick again. Fuck, he wants to lick it up and drink you down. “You’re leaking.” He states.

You laugh, breathing getting back to normal. “Yeah?” You reach your hand down to collect the distracting little droplet and bring it in front of you. You press the sticky finger to your thumb and then pull them apart to see the clear strings stay connected even as you pull. You hum, before offering your hand to Jeongguk. He sucks in a breath.

“Want some?” 

He’s quick as he crawls between you legs, cock fully hard now. He watches you as he sucks your fingers into his mouth, tongue swirling around getting every last bit, before he sucks off with a pop!

He crawls farther up your body to kiss you deep, wanting you to get a taste of yourself too. He pulls back just a bit, and whispers against your lips, “I want you to fuck yourself with it, okay? Just for a little bit, then you can cum?” He’s phrasing it as a question, knowing he really doesn't have the final say, not tonight. But his voice is shaking from how turned on he is, how could you ever say no?

“Sit back.” Is all you respond. He does as he’s told.

You buzz the toy over your clit again, just because you can. Wanting to see how long Jeongguk can be good before begging. Turns out it’s not long at all. 

“Put it in…” He moans. You look at him and his mouth is parted, and his eyes heavy as he watches you. His hand is moving fast over his cock, sticking straight up to his tummy. “Please.”

You drag the toy down to your slit, and tease it there before just barely pushing it in just a fraction of the length. Jeongguk whines, high and desperate. Apparently you’re moving to slow for him.

“More,” He begs. 

You sigh, “You’re so needy tonight, baby.” He nods, agreeable.

When the toy sinks inside of you all the way to the hilt, you and Jeongguk both moan a quiet, “Fuck.” simultaneously. You’re coherent enough to laugh a little at the jinx, but he seems to barely notice, too focused on watching the toy sink into you, and then come back out to vibrate your clit again. You keep up this teasing pattern, again waiting to be told what to do by him, waiting to see how long he makes it this time.

“Harder, do it harder,” He’s panting. Moaning every word that leaves his lips.

You do as he says, and finally push the toy in at a pace that gets you climbing to being close again. You won’t be able to come like this though, and he knows that. Knows that you can only cum from penetration with him. He leans over and grabs the other toy from the end table, spitting on it and spreading it around until it's covered well.

“Use them both, want you to cum for me.”

With two toys in your hands, one in your cunt, filling you up, and one on your clit, making your legs shake, you do your best to make yourself cum. But it’s not enough. A soft whine falls from your lips, you’re so close, but you need more. More than you can give yourself.

“Faster baby, faster. You’re so close.” He whispers. He got both hands working now too, one stroking and one down tugging on his balls. 

You whimper, ��I can’t my arm hurts. It’s tired.”

Immediately he stops pleasing himself and gets right to pleasing you. Your pleasure taking priority. “Shh, don’t worry, I’ll help you baby.”

Jeongguk sits between your legs, and takes over the toy fucking into you, and turns up the one on your clit. With him pushing the toy in at a pace that you couldn’t do yourself, and the other toy vibing your clit incessantly, it takes barely any time at all for you to cum. You were so close already, just needed him to push you over. 

Your legs are shaking and your toes are curling, when you cry out, “Baby, I’m gonna cum.”

“Do it, baby. Wanna watch.” He’s quiet, paying close attention to your body and the reactions he’s helping pull from it. He’s part of the reason why your face looks so pornographic as you finish. He’s part of the reason why your back is arching off of the bed. He’s part of the reason why your toes are curling, and why your legs are shaking, and why your pussy is contracting over the toy he’s still thrusting inside of you, working you through every last second of your orgasm. He reads your body cues, and slows down and pulls it out when you start to come down. You look blissed out, and you bring a hand to your hair and fluff it a little before laughing.

“That was good.” You sigh smiling, and when you look at him an image forms in your head, and you have every intention of making him carry it out.

Right before your eyes, Jeongguk wraps his lips around the toy that is going to be inside of him in just a short while, sucking off your slick. He laps his tongue around it trying to get it all. He’s obscene. 

“Gimme,” You say sitting up with an extended hand. 

He pouts at being interrupted, but does as he’s told. He takes your spot on the bed, and you head to the bathroom, stopping by your dresser on the way.

When you get to the bathroom, you close the door and get to cleaning the toys once again. After, you get to the stuff you grabbed from the wardrobe. A lacy pair of black panties, and sheer black thigh highs with matching lace adorning the tops. You slip into them, and then move on to the strap on. You hold it in front of you and try to make sense of which part goes where, and which holes your legs go into. It takes a second, but you get into it, adjusting it so it's nice and snug. Your outfit probably won’t help much with protecting your thighs, but at least the little part above your pussy will be safe. You look at yourself in the mirror. Not too weird or scary yet. You glance at the dildo on the counter.

It’s not too big so hopefully it’s not too… jarring when you see yourself with it. You get to work, slipping the suction base of the non-vibrating toy into the ring that’s meant to hold it in place. You look at it sticking out from your crotch and take a deep breath before turning to the mirror.

You gasp, before cackling quietly. You knew it was going to be weird. Like you knew. But actually seeing yourself with the whole get up is funny. Right now at least. You know it’s going to be sexy, once you get used to it and into the moment and inside of Jeongguk. You wonder how he’s going to react. Only one way to find out.

While you're walking to your bedroom from the bathroom, the dildo bobs, and you're giggling distractedly until you lift your eyes to let your boyfriend know you're ready. Again you’re met with a scene so indecent it belongs in a porno.

Jeongguk’s eyes are closed and soft moans are falling from his lips as he strokes his cock. He’s got three fingers in his ass, opening himself up for you, for your cock. Such a good good boy. He was so patient and productive while you got ready for him.

“You’re so good baby,” You murmur softly.

Jeongguk blinks his eyes open slowly, and rolls his head to the side to look at you. He doesn’t even falter in his movements at all, hand still moving, fingers still thrusting. He smiles a little when he sees you, but his eyes are hazy and he sounds lust drunk when he simply says, “You look sexy.”

You blush and a fond smile graces your lips, any embarrassment or self consciousness you were feeling prior to seeing him spread out for you on your bed, quickly vanishing.

You settle on the bed between his legs and watch for a moment as his hole takes his long fingers in. “Want me to help?” You ask quietly.

“Mhmm,” He nods, eyes closed still, tongue peeking out from between his lips. He doesn’t take his fingers out, though.

You grab the lube next to him, and flip it open. “You gonna get out so I can get in?” 

He shakes his head. “Nuh uh. Put one in with mine.”

Something about that makes your body tingle. Inside of him with him. Opening him up. You can’t explain it, because you don’t really even get it yourself, but it makes you buzz and feel almost high.

You slick up your middle finger, and drizzle some more on his for good measure. He jumps slightly, and then giggles softly.

“Cold.” He says.

“Sorry,” You say distractedly. Your finger is lined up with his now.

“I’ve never done 4 before so you… have to go slow…” He pauses as he speaks, letting himself moan freely when his fingers graze over that secret spot that he’s grown to love so much.

“Tell me to stop if you need to.”

He doesn’t reply, just stops his fingers so you can wiggle yours in next to his. At the first push against his hole, there’s resistance. Very much expected. He’s quiet, teeth gritted, but he never says stop, knowing his body wants it, and knowing it will accommodate what he wants. After the second knuckle, your finger sinks in, almost gets sucked in, by his hole.

He lets out a shaky breath.

“You okay, baby?” You check in.

“Yeah just… full.” He moans when you wiggle your finger experimentally. “”S good. Move it some more.”

You do, and his start to move with yours. You can feel his fingers curl inside of himself to reach his prostate, and it’s pleasant in an out of body way, knowing when his face is going to contort in pleasure, and when he’s going to cry out, when you never really knew before. You’ve milked him before, of course, but feeling him do it to himself from the inside? It’s kind of thrilling.

“Pull, stretch me out.” He moans, voice impatient and needy.

He gets kinda slutty when something’s up his ass.

He swears when you do, his finger rubbing insistent circles on his prostate to distract himself from the minor sting of the stretch. His moans, start to raise in pitch and his hand that’s on his cock, still jerking it, starts to speed up. You can tell he’s close. He clenches against your finger that’s still stretching him open.

“Fuck,” He says, on a breathless giggle, “Take them out. Or I’m gonna cum.” He’s still stroking his cock, like he doesn’t wanna stop.

“You c-” 

“No. Out.” He demands, hand finally pulling away from his cock, and his fingers inside stop. You gently ease out of him.

When Jeongguk’s fingers slip out, you gasp. His little pink hole is clenching on nothing, still open just the tiniest bit, thoroughly stretched.

“You know how you always say my pussy is pretty?” You ask, fingers tracing around the puffy stretched rim.

He makes an affirmative noise, watching you with hooded, lazy eyes as you touch him. He even spreads farther so you can touch and see better. You marvel at the difference between the embarrassed boy you made cum untouched a couple months ago, and the one in front of you now, so comfortable and relaxed. It makes you happy.

“Well, your butthole is pretty.”

He snorts, and kicks you lightly. He smiles at you, soft and sluggish. “Just fuck me.” 

He sounds so wistful and just ready.

But you’re not.

You grip the base of your cock, and stand up. You walk to the head of the bed, next to his confused face. You stay there waiting for him to get it. He doesn’t.

“You want me inside of you right baby?” You ask, voice gentle.

He nods, eyes no longer hazy, but wide and confused. He looks between you and your cock.

“I think that means you have to get me ready. Get me nice and wet, right?”

You can physically see when Jeongguk gets it. When it clicks for him. His eyes darken, and he licks his lips. “Yeah… You’re right. I should… help you.” He whispers, sitting up. You back up enough for him to have a place on the floor.

Jeongguk on his knees for you isn’t a new sight. He’s eaten your pussy like this before, you either grinding onto his face, or him holding you still and making quick work of your clit. But Jeongguk on his knees for you to suck your cock? New, and lewd. 

He looks nervous, kind of hesitant. A hand is raised midway, like he isn't sure if he should grab it. 

“Lick it, baby.” You encourage.

He glances at you, doe eyes seeking approval as he leans forward and gives a kitten lick to the tip. You nod, letting him know he’s doing well. His hand comes up and replaces yours at the base and he opens his mouth enough to wrap his lips around the head, and he swirls his tongue.

He pops off, and strokes up to where his mouth was and spreads the little bit of spit. The silicone is still dry though, so he spits on it more, straight from his mouth. You suck in a breath.

“Fuck, you’re so hot baby.” You whisper a breathy moan as his hands move up and down your cock. He adds his mouth again.

He hums a little, before backing up and looking at you again. “Does that feel good?” He asks.

You laugh lightly, in pure awe of him. He’s so sexy, and so sweet, and so incredibly lust inducing. Your pussy aches behind your cock. “Feels so good, baby. You’re doing so good.”

He hums, still stroking you off. “I really want it inside me…” He says, hinting that he’s ready.

You have mercy on him, having fulfilled your newfound personal fantasy enough for the night. Maybe you could revisit it another time. But now it was time to fulfill a mutual fantasy.

“On the bed, hands and knees.” You tell him.

Excitedly he hops back onto the bed, and gets into position, his hole on display for you. His back is arched and you can see the plush swell where his lower back meets the top of his cheeks. You settle behind him, and his shoulder to waist to hip ratio, is sinful. He’s always had the daintiest waist, strong, but still so small. But at this angle, it’s cinched and the way his legs are spread makes his hips look wider, accentuating the dip at his middle. You rub your hands over the narrow curve, all the way to his cheeks, grabbing handfuls of the muscle. There’s a slight give when you squeeze your hands.

Jeongguk’s head drops, and he lets out a shuddering sigh, he’s got the chills again, and he’s got a constant thrum coursing through his body. “Please…” He moans, so quietly, so desperately.

You kiss the small of his back before grabbing the lube left abandoned on the bed. You lather 2 of your fingers, and push them into Jeongguk’s hole making sure he’s nice and slick. There’s no resistance at all, hole loose and ready enough for them to slip right in. Then you lather your cock, probably with too much lube, honestly, but you wanted to be so sure that he didn’t feel any more pain than absolutely necessary. You knew the first initial push in would be the worst, but you were hopeful you both had stretched him out enough to at least minimize or diminish it altogether. 

You grab the base of your cock and line it up with his hole. It flutters, when you barely press against his rim.

“Ready?” You ask, giving a heads up.

“Yeah.” He says softly.

He’s tight. His hole sinks in with the tip of your cock before the rim gives and swallows around it. Jeongguk tenses and his hands grip the blanket under you. 

“Shit…” He groans. He sounds like he’s clenching his teeth.

You rub soothingly at his lower back, fingers dipping when you run them over the dimples at the bottom of his spine. “You’re doing so good baby.” You tell him.

“Doesn’t really hurt, I’m just stretching.” He says through his teeth. “I can take it though, keep going.”

You grab the lube and drizzle more directly onto his hole. He doesn’t mention the cold this time, too focused on taking your cock. You push against him, and feel yourself sink deeper into him. It’s like after the tip was in, his body knew what to do to take the rest. The slide wasn’t a swift, fast stroke, but it was a smooth and slow glide. When you bottom out Jeongguk’s arms give out from under him, his face going to the bed. 

“Holy fuck.” He keens, resting his head on his arms. Your hands are constantly on him, soothing him in any way that you can.

“Tell me when.” You whisper patiently. He nods. With his head turned to the side and pillowed on his arms, you can see his eyes are squeezed shut. The inhales and exhales you can see in the expanding of his ribcage, tell you that he’s taking deep breaths working through the stretch, getting himself used to it.

“Okay… Ready.” He murmurs.

You pull out just a bit before pushing back in. Jeongguk moans softly. Spreads his legs even wider, arches his back even deeper. He’s pushing his ass out for you, his body begging you to make it feel good.

You keep a slow pace, kind of nervous to speed up. 

“You can go faster, feels nice.” He says. He’s been puffing out little gasps of air every time you bottom out with your slow pace.

With his consent, you grab at his hips and pull out to just the tip, before swiftly pushing back in, fast and hard. His cheeks bounce on the impact. You grab one and jiggle it a little, thrusting into him again, drinking down the whines that slip out.

“You’ve got such a bubble butt, I never noticed before. But it like… bounces.” You say, wonder in your tone. 

“Thanks, can you like tell me about it later?” He asks, voice strained.

Point taken. 

Your thrust game is kind of shitty, in reality. It’s hard to find a rhythm, your hips not used to moving this way. But Jeongguk is moaning freely underneath you, just happy to have something inside of him after thinking about it all week. So you keep going, and eventually, the pattern comes to you, still kind of messy, but now you’ve got him cursing beneath you. You’ve got one hand on his ass, the other braced on his arched spine.

A particularly good thrust has Jeongguk burying his face into the bed, teeth biting at the bedding. “Yeah fuck-” He groans with his mouth full of blanket. With his hands now free, he brings them behind him and settles them on his cheeks and spreads.

You watch clearly as your cock sinks into Jeongguk’s ass. You’re out of breath, but you make sure to tell him how good he looks, how pretty his hole looks swallowing your cock, like it was made to take it.

“Wanna ride you.” He says. His voice is pitifully wrecked and he sounds so thoroughly fucked, you feel a little proud. Still, you’re grateful for a break. You don’t know how he fucks you like he does. ‘Topping’ is tiring. You pull out of him, and realize that when you were in awe of his hole at taking your fingers, it was premature. Jeongguk’s hole after he takes your cock is vulgar. It’s properly gaped now. Not huge, but around a fingers width.

He rolls over, and settles on his back like he just needs a moment. His chest is heaving, similar to yours. You hop off the bed, and a needy keen comes from him. You glance back at him, and he looks like he’s going to get up and follow you, but you hush him gently.

“I’m just getting some water, baby. I’ll be right back.” 

He huffs flopping back onto his back. “Hurry please.” He whines.

You get back as soon as possible with a glass of water for you both to share. He sits up onto one elbow and makes a grabby hand for the cup after you’ve had your share. You swat his hand away and hold the cup to his lips. He hums, gulping the water down. He’s happy to be coddled and taken care of. When he finishes with a cute little gasp, you place the cup to the side, and brush your hand through his sweaty hair. 

He butts his head against your palm and laughs. His eyes shut, and crinkled at the corners. His water break seems to have perked him up. His cock hasn’t deflated one bit. Rock hard and red, throbbing against his tummy. It’s messy and wet too.

You’re about to ask if he touched himself while you were inside of him, but before you can, you’re getting manhandled until he’s on top of you. He’s got your hands pinned above your head, and he smiles at you playfully, before leaning down to kiss you, deep and slow. He sucks on your lip, and slowly grinds his cock onto your belly, soft whines spilling from his tongue. He brushes his nose against yours as he sighs into your mouth, finally allowing himself the pleasure of paying attention to his cock. 

He doesn’t allow himself relief for long, however. He’s sitting up and looking from side to side for the lube before finally spotting it. His movements are quick and hectic, like he’s too excited and overly eager.

You rub your hands over his strong thighs. “Hey, slow down. You don’t have to rush. We have all night.”

He sighs at your touch, and nods softly. He whispers. “Yeah… okay. I love you.”

The little affection makes you swoon, absolutely smitten. “I love you.” You squeeze at his legs, tenderly.

He hums. “Gonna ride you now.” He opens the lube and continues with eager actions, almost like you didn’t even slow him down just a moment ago. You smile fondly to yourself. Jeongguk’s too busy slicking up your cock again to notice the mushy look.

He’s got a hand reaching behind him and he’s gripping your cock to line it up with his hole. He wiggles to get into the right position before slowly starting to sink down. His eyebrows are pinched, and his mouth falls open. But his eyes roll back when he bottoms out. His hands are braced on your stomach.

“Oh, I love it like this.” He whimpers. His legs tense at your sides, almost like he’s trying to close his legs at the pleasure he feels from your cock being tucked inside of him, hitting all the right places. He starts to grind on your cock, soft pleasured little mewls just tumbling off his tongue.

He looks so good, whining, grinding on you with his weeping cock displayed. But you wanna see him lose it on your cock. See him fall apart at how good it feels, not watch him bask in it.

“Bounce on it.” You say, voice sounding almost as fucked out as his. You know your panties are soaked through at this point, pussy pulsing and neglected, tucked away behind the strap.

Jeongguk nods. “Yeah, wanna.” 

He’s lifting himself off your cock to the tip before sliding down on it again, hard and fast. It punches a sharp gasp from his lungs. He finds a pace he likes and keeps it up, his thighs tensing, and his abs flexing as he tests his stamina, chasing that euphoric feeling he wants so so badly. He’s so strong and fit, bouncing up and down on your cock as loud unabashed moans fill the room. 

The force of him riding you makes your tits jiggle, bouncing around until they catch his attention. He groans before his hands find them, squeezing hard, using them as leverage as he pulls and drags his hips over yours. Your cock must be rubbing over his prostate because he’s losing his mind. All kinds of noises leave his mouth, and the expressions he makes are filthy.

“Fuck baby. You make me feel so good. The best- I-” He eyes squeeze shut and his mouth opens in a silent moan, overwhelmed, before a guttural groan sounds from deep within his chest. “God. Wanna cum on your cock, baby. Fuck me-”

You laugh, wonderstruck, and kind of deliriously high on the satisfaction and fulfillment you get from seeing Jeongguk feel so just…. Good. “Yeah baby? You’re gonna cum for me? All over my cock?”

He whimpers and nods as he gets back to bouncing, a desperation to his movements that wasn’t there before. His cock is slapping against both of your stomachs with nasty wet noises due to his precum getting everywhere. You feel some fly and hit your neck, his cock just dripping, weeping and begging to cum. 

It won’t be long though, before he cums. You feel the way his thighs tense, and he gets that confused look on his face, and he’s got that puzzled pitch to his moans. It’s the way he always gets when he cums untouched, always in awe that he can do it himself, without a hand around his cock. His whole body is flushed and hot to the touch, sweat making him glow in the soft light of your bedroom lamp.

He throws his head back, neck extended, and veins bulging, before looking down at his bouncing cock. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum.” He’s so whiny and noisy when he moans.

“Yeah?” You ask again, “Do it baby, show me how. You can do it, cum for me.” 

He’s nodding frantically, “Yeah- I’m gonna... Fuck, yes- Yeah, I’m-” He bounces a few more times, silent aside from the obscene squelching noises of your skin meeting, before his body tenses one last time before that string in him snaps. “Cumming-” He chokes it out. His moans don’t stop the whole time his cock shoots out his load, landing on your tummy. The moans even turn into cries, actual tears filling his eyes and falling down his cheeks. His body jerks and twitches with his orgasm. But still, he’s grinding on you, your cock still rubbing that spot inside of him, it’s like he never wants the feeling to end, even if it’s devastating, bordering on too much to handle.

You smooth your hands all over his sweaty body, before firmly placing them on his hips, stopping him. “Hey. You’re good, you did so good baby, you don’t have to keep going.”

Jeongguk’s cries are quiet, and he takes a few deep stuttering breaths to try and calm himself down, nodding with your soothing words. He rubs the back of his hand at his eyes, trying to dry them. It doesn’t help much, he’s calmed himself some but a few silent tears still make their way out, along with some soft hiccupping breaths.

“Lay down, and wait for me, hmm?” You whisper gently. He nods and lifts himself slowly, wincing at the sore ache in his hole. It’s more prevalent now that the pleasure has subsided. He all but collapses onto your pillow. 

“I’m gonna get some more water, and a towel okay?”

He grunts in response.

Before you go, you strip out of the gear, just tossing it on the ground, eager to get back to Jeongguk after getting the things you need.

When you get back, he is in the same exact position, and you laugh lightly. 

“Baby?” You ask, making sure he didn’t fall asleep.

Another grunt.

Good, he would hate you in the morning if you left him to sleep being so messy.

“Sit up, I have water and snacks and cleaning supplies.”

His head pops up. “Snacks?” His hair is sticking up on one side.

You laugh, endeared. He’s not crying anymore either, a good sign that he will be okay in just a little while after some kisses and love.

“Yeah, I got some of those seaweed chips you like, and some water.”

He sits up, leaning back on the pillows knowing the drill for after butt stuff. You hand him the water and the chips. He eats first.

“You hungry?” You ask, fitting yourself between his legs with the warm washcloth. He opens easily, munching away. You both are far past after sex shyness.

He talks with his mouth full. “Yeah. Jimin said not to eat the day off.”

You hum curiously, but don’t question it. Jimin partakes in butt stuff much more than you both. 

You’ve got all the lube cleaned off his thighs and cheeks, now all that’s left is his hole. You do it as gently as you can, knowing he’s sore just from how red and swollen and puffy it is.  But he still winces.

“How bad is it?” He mumbles.

You hesitate. “Um… You’re gonna be a little sore.” You tell him simply.

He groans, before downing his water. When he’s done, he says, “Practice is going to suck.”

You nod in agreement. It was. You wrap the used cloth in the blanket you used to protect your sheets, once again just tossing the bundle to the floor.

“Worth it though,” He smiles, pleased.

You chuckle as you find your place by him. He’s set his refreshments aside and lets you curl against him. His body sags with exhaustion when he feels your warmth press into him. You plant kisses on every inch of skin you can reach. He purrs.

“Why’d you keep going?” You ask, between smooches.

“I don’t know… it just felt so good. I guess I didn’t want it to stop.” He’s quiet, and his words are said on a sigh.

You nod, your kisses making your way to his lips. You just kiss him, slow and easy, for a few minutes until he yawns into it. He giggles.

“I’m so tired man.”

“I bet man.” You tease.

He kisses you one more time before asking, “Will you tickle my back until I fall asleep?” It’s hopeful and so sugary sweet.

“Yeah roll over.”

It’s barely a few minutes before you're met with his soft snores. You kiss his shoulder blade, before following right behind him.

~~~~

you ask for pegging and you shall receive :] i hope you liked it and that it met ur pegging standards askdkhjd as always, comments and feedback and asks and notes are loved and appreciated. thank you for reading friends ily :* 

[goddamnwebcomics]

Legacy of Dominic Deegan: Part 2

See my original first impression here.

Last time, our hero, Snout, rudely picked up some weed from a giant animal thingy. Turns out it’s one of the many ingredients he needs, as he also takes a giant leaf, steals web from a spider, and with that he gives himself a shirt. You would think that in Deegan world, people would actually herd sheep more to get wool, unless Mookie believes PETA propaganda. Of course he does.

Turns out Snout is looking for a new home, and he finds a cave, as well as a talking...piece of paper? Pagefinder, or essentially, medieval Siri. Cool. Wait, what happened to the orc frenspeak? I guess Mookie realized it was kind of stupid so he just returned to making orcs write like humans again. Pagefinder is a spell that finds lost pages, and even he gets edgy, but at least his edginess is played for laughs. Speaking of playing edginess for laughs, Snout has to go to the Blood Horror Canyon to get the first lost page. I suppose it’s a bit funny, but if Mookie unironically creates another Chosen Superform in this comic then it’s just gonna be dumber in hindsight. Another joke that i find kind of funny occurs with the signs. Turns out Snout is being followed by...evil demon cthulhu thing, but he accidentally stabs him in the eye with a falling spire.

An exciting battle occurs with the weirdo thingy, and Snout tries using Pagefinder as a shield, and as a result we get the first F bomb in Dominic Deegan, if Mookie didn’t include dicks earlier i’d congratulate him on graduating from middle school. Turns out Pagefinder’s ink just killed the beast. Huh, i’m amazed, you CAN kill something in this universe without turning into a superform! Anyways, Snout finds the first lost page but it has a hole in the middle of it, rendering it mostly incomprehensible. Wah wah. Eyeroll face occurs, which is...i suppose the traditional version of the punchline face? Snout asks Pagefinder for help but he can’t, and he messes up Snout’s face again in his self-pity. I mean, even if it’s a repeated punchline i still think it’s way better than butt-less chaps and Spark’s alliterations.

Snout goes back to the weird eye thing’s library. I suppose the frenspeak earlier was actually the way the owner of the library, Bort, types. We’re shown a twist that Pagefinders actually can’t communicate in other languages so WHO REALLY IS THIS PAGEFINDER?? Pagefinder says he explains everything once Snout has found the last two missing pages. I have a theory, Pagefinder is Trapped Deegan. Of course, it’s a Mookie’s signature SHOCK TWIST that you totally can’t expect. The biggest evidence against it however is that Pagefinder is actually a likable character. No wait, turns out Snout’s theory is that Ink Witch is communicating with him through pagefinder. He needs to find a gruesome, evil tree and we get another eyeroll face. Fuck it, i’m just gonna call it the Modern Punchline Face (MPF) as opposed to Classic Punchline Face (CPF) because i know that’s gonna be common now.

We get another recycled gag with the signs which reveals Skori Trees can shoot branches. Snout makes it into Skori territory and is bombarded with branch bullets yet avoids every single one??? What is he using? Magic? He manages to make it out of Skori’s grasp without a single scratch. Okay so far that’s the first really dumb thing in this comic, because Snout apparently is either using dodging magic or extremely athletic. He tells Pagefinder he hopes to get the berries Ink Witch may have used instead.

Pagefinder gets a piece of dat berry, and suddenly a giant arrow pops up and she drags Snout to the next page...which is Skori Tree. MPF Number 3 occurs. Snout tries to make friends with the tree, but Skori wants nothing to fucking do with the orc. I wonder if Siggy hung that orc family from a Skori tree, just to bury him some more? So Snout’s next plan is to fly to the tree by using the Pagefinder. He makes it but Skori begins to make his plan impossible. Skori gives him the finger but Snout gives him one back. Then...the tree just gives up? Snout gets the missing piece, and we find out the ol’ Dullminic went to Asinoteph, where dreams become visions, and apparently he tried to see the future, but instead he saw...oh boy, next page will unveil the twist. Did he see the past? the present? the winter of his discontent? the apocalypse? the Chosen? Whatever it is, it’s probably dumb.

Snout gets ready to sleep, and even Pagefinders need to sleep. We don’t get reprise of the orc dick this time. No wait, we do, as we see Snout in a dream, where an ink vortex...happens. What? No blood? No gore? No horror? Hmm, maybe Dominic saw THE INK? Snout makes his dream diary, and presents his questions about the last page, that basically ask readers to think about these questions too. I actually like this. It makes our hero look more huma...er, orc, and being used to Gene Catlow mystery exposition it also helps recapping the ongoing mysteries of the comic without pretentious third person pronouning and vague vagueness.

Snout goes to last missing page, which is held by an orc with a beard. Is that a male crone? Old Stoneraper? How come Snout does not have tusks? Honestly, i like him way more without the damn tusks. The old bastard smiles kindly when he sees Snout and gives him the page. Holy shit? An orc being nice to another orc? That’s like...a fucking fever dream. The orc then commits magic disappearance thing. Yup, i’m sure it was Old Stoneraper. Turns out, Deegan did actually see the end of all prophecy, and beginning of his legacy. Um, what? So does this mean that the visions are now gone forever? Thank fucking god, because it got so fucking confusing in the original comic. But wait, if he’s looking for his legacy, is he talking about Snout? Or is he like, looking for someone with good legacy in a talent show? I dunno, lay your theories on me Snout. But before that, the old orc comes. But the Pagefinder warns him that he is in a TERRIBLE DANGER. Oh boy, never mind orcs being nice. All orcs are still assholes to eachother, thanks Siggy.

Snout tells the old orc he was one of the few who didn’t hurt him, if he only kneeeew. Snout asks Old Orc what happened to him, and he falls to...visionscape, sigh. He runs towards a strange ink cube before returning to reality. Turns out Old Orc took all the pages. Oh hey, our protagonist does mistakes, and he actually suffers from them. That’s the first time EVER i’ve seen that in this blog, and then...Pagefinder dismantles. Not gonna lie, it is competing with Sleeve in terms of saddest inanimate object death in a webcomic. Snout wonders what is he gonna do, when he remembers his strange dream. Turns out Dominic Deegan recorded a song called “The Day i Dreamed Again”? No wait, a poem. Turns out Dominic learned to see visions again, and wrote a book about lucid dreams. Bort does not have it, so he has to go into another library. We reach the page i saw in my last Webcomic Check, where poor ol’ Snout is afraid of leaving his new home, and even makes a full list of pros and cons of leaving his home. Not gonna lie, Mookie does actually explore a lot of things he can do with a deaf mute protagonist, as opposed to having a deaf mute protagonist for the sake of having a deaf mute protagonist.

Snout begins his quest the next day, believing he might lose so much if he stays in his homeplace, and the mysteries on his mind keep him up at night. He sees...a lot of things, but thankfully does not bump into any werewolves, dragons or four armed naga things. He finally finds a place called...Mongreltown, but is immediately followed by something. That something is the spaceship that destroyed his home. Mongreltown can wait as he sees the spaceship has crashed. Out of it comes...the Ink Witch, who looks way more adult than any other character Mookie has drawn. Ink Witch is happy to see Snout but remembers he is deaf so she talks in form of ink, and that’s where we leave our story.

So far, i really really like this. The only problems i had were the increased usage of cheap punchline pages and MPF, as well as the rather cheap ways the spaceship arc and the battle with Skori Tree were resolved, but on the contrast there was a LOT of stuff i enjoyed, and i can’t believe i’m saying that about a Mookie comic. Snout is actually a very likable character, and his design has grown on me, his unique status as a deaf mute protagonist was explored, without turning him into a stupid exposition machine, as he only writes when it’s necessary. Pagefinder (RIP) was a very likable character and Mookie seems to be mocking himself with some of the jokes in the comic. The mystery of Dominic Deegan’s fate didn’t really get me invested yet as it’s still an actual mystery that’s important and not just a side thing that’s resolved through third person pronouns and “unseen” reveals. Also we’re shown so many new creatures and species on this comic, none of which are hideous furrybait. It really helps upgrading this setting to an actual fantastic setting and not just “modern setting with fantasy textures applied” that the original comic’s Dominion was. Also, the comedy was actually kind of funny even with the occasional repetition and the MPF.

It’s not the best comic i’ve read ever, but it is the best comic i’ve ever read on this blog. There is a little bit of dread in me though that this comic might go downhill sooner or later. This is still Mookie writing this.

[toraonice]

Yuri on Festival voice drama (detailed report)

I went to watch the next-day viewing of yesterday’s Yuri on Festival event, and this time I took notes for the drama so I’ll write a more detailed summary, also because this one isn’t going to be sold on DVD. I believe other people have probably written reports too, but in cases such as this I think “the more the merrier” because it’s not recorded so it’s better to have more accounts. Also, now you’ll start seeing more Japanese reports & art too. Most people were keeping quiet out of consideration for the ones who could only watch the viewing and didn’t want spoilers.

Official title of the drama: “Fundoshi da yo!!! Sekai Metsubou Daipinchi Hasetsu Kunchi Spiritual!!” which roughly translates to “Fundoshi!!! The world is in danger of being destroyed. Hasetsu Kunchi Spiritual!!”

It was in 3 parts, separated by game and information corners. I hope it’s not too confusing, but especially the last part is impossible to summarize decently because they talked a lot and I couldn’t possibly take note of everything, not to mention what they say is mostly crazy stuff, lol. For some parts and lines I double-checked looking at other Japanese comments online. If something is not clear feel free to send me an ask.

Continue under “keep reading”.

The story starts with Yuuri and Victor watching Hasetsu Kunchi, a local festival in Hasetsu, the day after the “Victor With Friends” ice show (and the Chihoko drama). Victor says “Look Yuuri, so many sumo wrestlers!” and Yuuri replies “It’s not sumo wrestlers, they are wearing fundoshi!”. He explains to him that fundoshi + happi (the “coat” they are wearing) are the traditional clothes people wear at the festival, and Victor seems very interested in the fundoshi. Yuuri flinches and says that he has a hangover from the day before, and they have a conversation somewhat like this: Victor: “You were amazing yesterday~. (he says this in a sexy voice and the audience was like “wooohh”) I can’t believe you did that~.” Yuuri: “Did I do something again??” Victor: “Eh, you don’t remember? Last night you…” Yuuri: “No wait, don’t tell me! Some things are better left unknown…” Yuuri seems kind of resigned, like “I messed up after drinking once again.. well, as always..” (he says this in a monologue, not to Victor). Yurio suddenly shows up and is super excited about the hikiyama (the festival floats). He comments that the floats look like the warriors’ cars in Mad Max. Yuuri explains that Hasetsu Kunchi is a harvest festival, and that the floats all have their own story. Victor sees one shaped like a squid, and Yuuri says it’s called “ankoku ika aramitama” (which Yurio translates as something like “dark ika wild heart”) (ika = squid) and it’s based on the legend of a dark squid that tried to destroy the world by spreading dark matter. Yurio is totally thrilled by the story. To placate the squid and save the world from destruction, people sang, danced and flattered the squid a lot. Victor finds the story original and proposes to use it as Yuuri’s new SP, wearing fundoshi as the costume. Yuuri curtly replies that he’d get kicked out for excessive nudity, and that if he had to leave figure skating because of something like that he’d probably want to hide under a rock and die. Yurio comments that “doing the squid dance in fundoshi” is exactly what Yuuri, together with his father, did the night before, and Yuuri says “ok, I want to hide under a rock and die” (he says “人間やめたい” in Japanese, that literally translates to “I want to quit being a human”, but the meaning is the same as “hide under a rock and die”).

The scene moves to Chris, who is enjoying the festival too. He notices people wearing fundoshi and says “oh, that’s the Japanese traditional T-back (thong)” (he says exactly that, in English). He wants to try it on, so he asks one of those people but mistakes the sentence in Japanese and ends up saying “I want to become your fundoshi”, of course shocking the guy. He then manages to convey the message using a Hasetsu guide that he got at Yutopia and finally gets to try the fundoshi. He comments that the fundoshi feels like “freedom and danger mixed together” and he likes it. In the end they also invite him to ride one of the floats.

Back to Yuuri and Victor, who have lost sight of Yurio. Yuuri explains to Victor that the floats are 14, though they were originally 15 but one suddenly disappeared. This 15th float represented “Ame-no-chihoko-nushinokami” and of course Victor reacts to the word “chihoko”. Yuuri (who is clueless regarding the “chihoko” issue) says that it’s a god of crops, relationships and basically like a god of love. Victor asks whether it’s a goddess and Yuuri replies that it’s a genderless god that was said to bring love to people. No one knows why it disappeared, some say that it might have burnt down and some that it was killed by the ankoku ika (the dark squid), but it’s also said that it will appear again when the world is filled with love.

They are interrupted by some floats coming their way, and they notice that Chris is riding one of them (it was funny how Victor said “oh, it has some familiar eros as a topping”). He jumps down (with a triple Salchow) and asks them how he looks in the fundoshi. Yuuri says that he stands out because he’s the only one who clearly has an athlete’s body. Chris wants to use it for his next program, but Yuuri once again says that he’d get a huge point deduction, so Chris proposes to use it for an exhibition program together with Victor. He wants to “make the rink wet with our fundoshi bomb” (I believe it’s a reference to Plushenko’s “Sex Bomb”) and Yuuri strongly opposes saying “You can’t do that, the rink’s not gonna get wet, it’s gonna become like the Genkai Sea!!!” (it’s a sea in Kyushu, in front of the Karatsu bay). They then have this conversation: Victor: “Yuuri, we want to try the Hasetsu Kunchi look too, right?” Yuuri: “’We’?” Victor: “It’s a pity to only watch. A festival must be enjoyed by participating!” Yuuri: “Ehh…” (clearly annoyed) Victor: “Yuu~ri~” Yuuri: “Don’t make that cute face Victor, it won’t work. I said I feel sick because of the hangover, didn’t I?” And then Victor and Chris start chanting “en~ya~” “en~ya” (it’s a call the participants say during this festival) one after the other, over and over, changing the tone midway, with Yuuri repeating “no way” “I’m NOT doing it” “I’m not wearing that” “you’re not gonna convince me even if you change the tone” “I said NO” and then the drama fades out. (Of course it’s obvious that it was bound to be “famous last words”)

The second part starts with Georgi who seems to like the atmosphere of the festival and wants to incorporate it in his program for the next season. He then starts composing some “haiku” because he got interested after Yuuri’s mom told him about them. He also mentions Yuuri & his father’s squid dance, says that he wants to thank the Katsuki family for entertaining him during his stay in Hasetsu and takes note of the names of Yuuri’s parents on his notebook. He then receives a phone call from Yakov (we do not hear Yakov’s voice), who is calling him because he can’t reach Yurio. Yakov asks him to tell Yurio to get him a heated “washlet” (the Japanese toilet seat with incorporated “shower” function) from the local department store of electric appliances Best Denki if he passes by Fukuoka on his way back to Russia. While taking notes, he is worried that he might mix up “Yuri” and “Yuuri” so he writes “Yurio” instead because that’s how Victor was calling him (I’m sure Yurio will love Victor for this..). He suddenly happens upon Yurio and at this point we find out that Georgi is actually wearing a fundoshi too. Yurio is running away from the Yuri Angels. Georgi tells him that if he wants to hide he should wear a fundoshi, because “as leaves can easily hide in a forest, you can hide among fundoshi with a fundoshi”. Georgi then leaves after Yurio calls him “old man”, but he notices that Yurio is stalking him. When he confronts him about this in the beginning Yurio tries to feign ignorance, but eventually confesses that he lost sight of the others and can’t find his way back (here the audience went “awwww”). The scene ends with Georgi creating a haiku where he calls Yurio “lost kitten” and Yurio gets mad.

Leo and Guang-Hong are watching the festival together. Leo says that he is considering creating a “wa-pro” (a figure skating program with a Japanese theme) for the upcoming season. He said that he was deeply influenced by Carolina Kostner’s 2017 SP programs “God of Thunder” and “Bonzo’s Montreux”, especially the use of drums and other rhythmical sounds combined with her skating technique. Guang-Hong says that he likes Akio Sasaki’s SP program “Japanese Dance No.5” and the ninja-like sound effects/performance. They both say that ninja are cool. Speaking about cool performances that include movements like slashing with a sword they quote Tatsuki Machida’s exhibition program to “Concierto de Aranjuez”. They then conclude mentioning Yuzuru Hanyu’s “Seimei” and Leo says that one day he wants to create a wa-pro that suits his own style. (I am thankful to the skating fans who listed up all the programs mentioned in the drama because I would never have been able to remember them...)

The scene changes to Michele and Emil, who find a fundoshi shop. Emil is fascinated by a very long fundoshi and asks Michele if he ever tried aerial skating (skating performance that involves lifting oneself up with a rope hanging from the ceiling). He said he has tried, and Emil proposes to do an aerial skating exhibition program together in the next season. He then starts saying progressively crazy things like “with the fundoshi we will be able to be free and fly to space!”. He says that, once in space, they will battle an enemy army and fuse together with the power of fundoshi. Since Michele doesn’t seem thrilled Emil says that if he doesn’t want to do it he will ask Sara, and of course he gets mad. Leo and Guang-Hong join them and get all hyper looking at the fundoshi too. Guang-Hong says that he wants to use the fundoshi to train to become a ninja, because of something he read on the Hasetsu guide he got from Yuuri’s house. Emil is like “we can’t do something so stupid” (the one who was talking about flying to space..) but Michele is actually interested in becoming a ninja because apparently Sara used to love ninja when she was little.

Third part. Yuuri, Victor and Chris are now in “Hasetsu Kunchi style” (fundoshi + happi). Victor: “Yuuri, how do I look in the Hasetsu Kunchi style?” Yuuri: (annoyed) “It looks great, of course. Both you and Chris have a nice athlete’s body even now in the off-season, of course it looks good on you.” Victor: (evidently making fun of him) “Oh Yuuri, I know we’re in the off-season, but don’t you have a little too much flesh over that fundoshi~?” Yuuri: (more irritated) “Yeah, my belly stands out, doesn’t it?? That’s why I said I didn’t want to do this… Oh, I might try to hide it with the happi”. He also suddenly mentions feeling cold, which might be foreshadowing what happens later in the drama. Yuuri wonders where the others are, and Chris says “I’m going to help” using a Japanese expression that literally translates to “I’m going to strip” (人肌脱ぐ, I can’t come up with a more literal translation that would have a similar nuance right now..), so Victor tells him “if you get more naked than you are now it will be considered a crime in Japan”. Chris starts doing a rotational lift (no one says who is lifting him lol) on the top of the float to act as a beacon so that the others can find them, and they actually do find them.

The first ones to arrive are Georgi and Yurio. Yurio is dressed in Hasetsu Kunchi style too now, and he says it’s because “fundoshi will hide other fundoshi”. Georgi asks what “en~ya~” means and Yuuri says it’s like the Russian “davai”. Georgi takes note. They then spot a few long fundoshi in the distance and realize it’s Guang-Hong, Leo, Emil and Michele. Guang-Hong says “I told you that rotational lift was Chris!”. They explain that they were running because they are training to become ninja for their “wa-pro”, and Yuuri can’t understand how running in a fundoshi could be connected to the wa-pro. Chris points out that Michele didn’t participate in the ice show “Victor With Friends” and Michele says he came because Emil told him he could see something extreme in Japan (he is probably referring to Victor doing the shachihoko pose on the top of Hasetsu castle, because I remember him referring to it as “extreme” in the previous drama too). He says that he was actually in Canada with Sara to prepare their new program but then Sara left him alone to go on a “girls’ trip” with Mila. Yuuri asks about Phichit and Leo says he went to Detroit to prepare his new program with Celestino (they are basically explaining why the skaters who participated in the ice show are not here, though the actual reason is of course that their voice actors couldn’t come to the event). Guang-Hong says that Seung-gil is having his next program choreographed by Kenji-sensei (Kenji Miyamoto). Yuuri comments, almost to himself, “I see, everyone is getting ready for the next season”, and Guang-Hong tells him “why don’t you prepare a wa-pro too, since you’re Japanese?”. The word “Japanese” reminds Yuuri of Minami, and Guang-Hong tells him that he went back to Fukuoka because he has to study for an exam.

Guang-Hong says that Minami wanted to get inspiration from a festival for his program, and Yuuri decides to send him a video he took of Hasetsu Kunchi for him to use as a reference (he also writes “good luck for the exam”). However, Guang-Hong remembers that Minami talked about the Hakata Gion Yamakasa festival. Yurio comments that it’s a super cool festival, much bigger and cooler than Hasetsu’s, and that he found out about it at the information desk of Fukuoka airport. He also says that in Fukuoka there is “Best Denki, a very cool shop where you can find all kinds of electric appliances”, and that you cannot find it in Hasetsu. Yuuri mentions (with a sulky tone) a series of places that you can’t find in Hasetsu but only in Fukuoka, because it’s a larger city where people “can follow all their dreams”. Victor tells Yuuri that he should start thinking about his next program too, and you can hear that Yuuri is getting progressively upset about the matter. He says (with a self-deprecating tone) that he feels stupid for acting like a “senpai” and sending Minami a video of Hasetsu Kunchi while he had in mind Yamakasa which is much cooler, and that maybe he (Yuuri) should perform as a clown in his next program. Victor says that in the morning he met Minami in the onsen and he told him very excitedly that he loved Takahito Mura’s program “Shogun” and one day he also wanted to perform a program like that (here Suwabe imitates Minami’s voice and it was hilarious). Yuuri comments that it’s a cool program with which Mura won the Four Continents in 2014 and that he (Yuuri) would never be able to perform such a heroic program. Guang-Hong says that Minami even uploaded a video in which he skated Mura’s “Shogun”, like Yuuri’s video in which he skated “Hanarezu ni Soba ni Ite”.

The atmosphere gets progressively tense as Yuuri is clearly shocked by the fact that Minami looks up to Mura and wants to become like him, because he thought he looked up to himself. The scene where Minami tells Yuuri that he looks up to him is shown on the screen and Yuuri is like “Minami-kun said that he looked up to me, didn’t he???”. (It was amusing how one of the things that contributes to upset Yuuri is that Minami did “kidoku through”, which in messaging programs like LINE means that the other person has read your message but ignored it instead of replying to it). Victor says that Yuuri is starting to “break”, and the others suddenly see the dark squid float getting close. Yuuri starts saying nonsense like “Victor is my inspiration, and I’m Minami-kun’s inspiration, so basically I am to him what Victor is to me, so basically I am Victor. If Mura-kun becomes Minami-kun’s inspiration, it means that Mura-kun will become Victor. Victor Mura Nikiforov Takahito! He said that.. I was his inspiration.. You said it, didn’t you… MINAMIIII”. Guang-Hong sends a video of what’s happening to Phichit, and Yuuri jumps on the dark squid float. He starts exhaling something dark from his mouth and Yurio (who is convinced that Yuuri just drank too much) says “I bet it’s just puke”. Emil replies “But it’s like, swirling in the air. I’ve never seen such extreme puke!!” (Even after this they keep on referring to it as “puke” or “extreme puke” a few times)

Yuuri starts to speak with a low tone, like a villain, and says he is “ankoku ika aramitama” (he also says a few lines that are basically parodies of lines that he actually said in the anime) and he will destroy the world. Michele says he laughs like the final boss of a game, and Yurio comments that sometimes Lilia laughs like that too (roar of laughter from the audience). They try to speak to Yuuri but no matter what they say he replies with a sentence that ends with “I will destroy the world”. Georgi says that what Yuuri is exhaling is “dark matter”, and as soon as he says that Yurio suddenly gets excited (like “OMG DARK MATTER SO COOL”). Georgi says that it comes from disruptive feelings such as jealousy, which attracted “ankoku ika aramitama” and caused it to possess him. He explains that a long time ago a dark squid created a black hole with the dark matter it had inside and tried to destroy the world. He read this on the Hasetsu guide written by Yuuri’s father. He starts talking about the guide itself but Victor stops him and tells him “You can tell us on our flight back, we have to save the little piggy (kobuta-chan) first”.

In the meantime, Michele is about to be sucked into the black hole but is saved by Emil with their fundoshi fusion technique that they wanted to use in the exhibition. Georgi says that, according to the guide, to defeat the squid people sang, danced and flattered it, but Yurio says he’d rather get sucked into the black hole than flatter Yuuri. Yuuri starts making painful noises and they realize that the festival song which is now playing is affecting the squid. They want to sing but don’t know the lyrics of the song, so they decide to use the “poems” written on Georgi’s notebook (which are mostly the random notes he has been taking so far, like the names of Yuuri’s parents etc) (EDIT: You can now find a full translation of the "lyrics” here!).

They sing and then encourage the audience to chant “davai~ davai~” together with them. Yuuri wavers between the squid and himself, and Victor tells him to remember his dream, to remember Victor’s first arrival in Hasetsu and the time he, Yuuri and Yurio spent together there. “Yuri on Ice” starts playing over scenes from the first episodes, and Victor recalls their memories in Hasetsu, among which the scene where they talked on the beach. He says that he was very happy when he asked Yuuri what he wanted their relationship to be and Yuuri told him to “just be Victor”. Victor: “Remember your skating. Figure skating. All the people who support you. Me and you. What is there?” Yuuri: “Love” Victor: “Yes,” Victor & Yuuri together: “Love”. The dark matter starts to shine and they realize that darkness vanished from Yuuri’s heart. Suddenly, the float of “Ame-no-chihoko-nushinokami”, the god of love, appears. Georgi says that it appears when the world is filled with love, and that this is another thing he read on the Hasetsu guide.

Yuuri is finally back to himself. Victor grumbles “So this is Chihoko..”. Yuuri notices the float and exclaims: “Why is the ame-no-chihoko-nushinokami” float here!?”. Victor: “It’s love” Yuuri: “L-Love..?” Chris: “So Victor is the one who makes Yuuri go crazy and also that brings him to his senses. I’m jealous~”. (The audience here was “woooohhh”) At this point Georgi remembers to tell Yurio that Yakov wants him to buy a heated washlet from Best Denki. And Guang-Hong says that Phichit wrote on his SNS “my friend is a human again!” (parody of the line “my friend got married!”). Yuuri receives a reply to his message from Minami, where he says “Hasetsu Kunchi looks cool! I need to do my best to become like Yuuri-kun”, so Yuuri is all happy. The drama ends with Victor saying “The festival can’t start without you, Yuuri. Hasetsu’s night isn’t over yet.” and Yuuri yelling to the public “Everyone! Enjoy Hasetsu!”

And they lived happily ever after… (no they don’t say this but I think it fits). From here on it’s just my impressions.

This drama was really amusing and I could comment about basically every part.. I love when Victor and Chris annoy Yuuri together (like, you suddenly wonder who is the oldest there, lol), and how Yuuri complains but gives in. Also, Victor doing a cute face when he’s trying to persuade him… And Yuuri who is basically treating Victor in a way you would never have expected only watching the first 2-3 episodes of the series (and that just shows how close they are now).

Also, Yurio being annoyed the whole time but going ZOMG whenever something “cool” is involved. It’s hard to call this drama “canon” because of its surreal content, but if the characters are IC there is a chance he might end up being called “Yurio” by his Russian rinkmates too, lol.

Unfortunately I don’t think the summary does Georgi justice, because lots of the amusing parts are impossible to take notes of while listening… Same for all the crazy bits in the third part, and of course the way they pronounced the lines, which is hard to express with plain text but was definitely one of the best parts of the drama. Yuuri changes his voice so many times… And Victor’s lines too can sound completely different depending on how he pronounces them (sometimes he uses a sexy voice, so lines that would otherwise be normal sound more sensual or suggestive). I wish they’d release this drama on CD as a standalone, so more people can listen to it, but I guess it’s difficult because they mention names of real people and, most importantly, real shops/brands.. They’d have to bleep them out, but I’d be ok with them doing it if it makes the drama releasable, lol.

[itsjaybullme]

10 of the Toughest Moves to Master

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Challenge Yourself

Westend61 / Getty

It’s easy to get stuck in a world of redundancy in the weight room, and if you’re anything like me, you’re quick to default to the stuff you’re good at before challenging yourself with what you know will do your body good. It takes real discipline and a much needed ego check to humble yourself and submit to an exercise that delivers plenty of bang for the buck—even if that means the amount you can lift is pitiful.

On that note, here are 10 moves that should make your list when it comes to delivering a challenge that you probably need.

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1. Front Squat

Edgar Artiga

This may not seem like it belongs on this list, let alone first—but rest assured that this movement is not only underused, it’s also underappreciated. People often avoid the front squat because it’s just plain harder to do, making lift numbers suffer. If it’s not that, they avoid it due to it exposing plenty of mobility restrictions throughout the body. Since we’re not here to inflate the ego, it’s worth gaining the requisite mobility and strength to perform these well. Do your best to use a clean grip, to avoid imbalances.

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2. Dumbbell Snatch

Marc Royce

The Olympic lifts are demanding, complex movements that are suitable for a very select crowd of weight-training enthusiasts and athletes. However, the demographic opens up drastically when simplifying one of these lifts to a single dumbbell variation. People who have difficulty with overhead squats or general shoulder issues may not fare too well with traditional barbell snatches. Grabbing a moderate to heavy dumbbell and performing snatches with one hand allows a lifter to trigger similar explosiveness while finding much more shoulder-friendly finish positions as you work on your mobility. Focus on sets of 8 reps or less.

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3. Turkish Getup

Edgar Artiga

Let’s face it: You’ve heard about the Turkish Getup before, probably several times. Chances are, you’ve written it off as useless too, since it’s not a squat, deadlift, or chinup. But where conditioning, general joint health, and mobility are concerned, you can’t get much better. Whether you’re someone specifically looking for the above, or you’re a meathead with plenty of restrictions, you’re going to benefit from doing these to help open you up and jack-up your heart rate in the process. A great basic conditioning guide would be to start with any weight (kettlebell, dumbbell, or sandbag) you want, and do 5 minutes straight, alternating arms each time. Take a 2-minute break between rounds, and continue for as many rounds as you can. Too easy? Just increase the weight, and decrease your rest interval between rounds by 30 seconds.

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4. Hanging Legs Raise

Per Bernal / M+F Magazine

Doing hanging legs raises instead of situps, crunch variations, or rope flexions for the abs are not only more challenging but also healthier. Especially if you’re a big guy, it takes a lot to hang from a bar and use your core to pull your heavy legs up to the chest for reps. But the added benefit of choosing this move is the fact that your ribcage and thoracic region don’t lose their position of extension. It’s one of the few trunk flexion movements that actually works from the bottom-up and not the top-down, promoting the maintenance of good posture and no strain on the neck and thoracic vertebrae. If true hanging legs raises are a bit too tough, there’s no shame investing in sleeves to attach to your pullup bar to support your upper arms while performing the movement.

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5. Floor Press

YouTube / boyceperformance

Floor presses can serve as a supplement to your chest and triceps training, or a complete substitute for your bench press for a lifter with cranky shoulders. The fact that the elbows are blocked by the floor prevent joint discomfort from a deep finish position, and the fact that dumbbells are being used allows for changes in elbow positioning, so a lifter can find his sweet spot that causes no pain. As a bonus, each arm has to work for itself, without the presence of legs drive, which can prove deadly for chest and triceps stimulation.

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6. Paused Back Squat

Per Bernal / M+F Magazine

If you’re on this site, chances are you already back squat. If you want a humbling experience to be made even more humbling, add 2-second pauses at the bottom of each rep. Something so simple is so effective at building muscle and making light weight feel heavy, due to the removal of any momentum or transfer of forces. It makes each rep much more “honest” and reliant on true strength, and not exchanges of energy. Be prepared to lower the weight you’re lifting by about 20% if you’re looking to match your typical rep ranges.

8 of 11

7. Z Press

YouTube / Lee Boyce

Speaking of honesty, it’s already a rarity to see people strict barbell overhead pressing at most commercial gyms. But asking for proper form in that movement is equivalent to asking too much. The Z press allows for no shortcuts to be made, since the seated position eliminates the potential for a “push off” or legs drive, and there’s no backrest to the seat either. That means your hip mobility has to be on point to create a neutral spine position while sitting tall. If you can’t achieve this, it’ll show right away. Moreover, a seated overhead position asks for healthy shoulders, or else the bar will end up in front of the body. A quick tip for people who aren’t mobile enough: Try sitting on a step platform to start; the hips will be more open and this will make it easier to keep a neutral spine.

9 of 11

8. Overhead Squat

YouTube / boyceperformance

Sparingly applying overhead squats to your routine is a good way to gauge your general mobility and give your conditioning a kick while you’re at it. As I said, it’s not recommended as a main lift, but is worth its weight in gold when applied correctly. This movement exploits shoulder, hip, ankle, knee, and lumbar restriction the second you do your first rep (and there’s a reason it’s the first test in the popular FMS assessment protocol). Remember to squeeze outward on the bar as hard as possible while keeping it over the mid foot the entire time.

10 of 11

9. Kettlebell Angled Press

YouTube / boyceperformance

To target the mid back and lower traps, the angled press works well since the deltoids don’t get much chance to enter the movement and take it over. Starting with a tucked position close to the chest, aim to maintain the same angle of the torso with the arms (like an extension of the torso itself), and hold position for a full second before sliding the weight back in. Compare this movement to a face pull or trap raise, and you’ll note that in both cases the deltoids get the chance to contribute concentrically to the lift. Eliminating this from the start by using constant tension is the key here.

11 of 11

10. Eccentric Pullup

Matthew Leete / Getty

Most people who say they can crack out dozens of chin- or pullups in a row are lying about it, especially when reviewing good form. But whether you’re good at pullups or not, exploiting the negative reps will prove challenging mentally and physically, while delivering huge benefits for hypertrophy and strength. The fast-twitch fibers get trained a whole lot more when slowing down eccentric phases of training, so gunning for 5-second, negative-only chinups have many pros, and very few cons. Use them for sets of 6-8 reps at any point in your workout.

Previous Next

from Bodybuilding Feed http://www.muscleandfitness.com/workouts/workout-tips/10-toughest-moves-master via http://www.rssmix.com/

[itsjaybullme]

10 of the Toughest Moves to Master

1 of 11

Challenge Yourself

Westend61 / Getty

It’s easy to get stuck in a world of redundancy in the weight room, and if you’re anything like me, you’re quick to default to the stuff you’re good at before challenging yourself with what you know will do your body good. It takes real discipline and a much needed ego check to humble yourself and submit to an exercise that delivers plenty of bang for the buck—even if that means the amount you can lift is pitiful.

On that note, here are 10 moves that should make your list when it comes to delivering a challenge that you probably need.

FEATURED WORKOUT: SUMMER SHRED 2017>>

2 of 11

1. Front Squat

Edgar Artiga

This may not seem like it belongs on this list, let alone first—but rest assured that this movement is not only underused, it’s also underappreciated. People often avoid the front squat because it’s just plain harder to do, making lift numbers suffer. If it’s not that, they avoid it due to it exposing plenty of mobility restrictions throughout the body. Since we’re not here to inflate the ego, it’s worth gaining the requisite mobility and strength to perform these well. Do your best to use a clean grip, to avoid imbalances.

3 of 11

2. Dumbbell Snatch

Marc Royce

The Olympic lifts are demanding, complex movements that are suitable for a very select crowd of weight-training enthusiasts and athletes. However, the demographic opens up drastically when simplifying one of these lifts to a single dumbbell variation. People who have difficulty with overhead squats or general shoulder issues may not fare too well with traditional barbell snatches. Grabbing a moderate to heavy dumbbell and performing snatches with one hand allows a lifter to trigger similar explosiveness while finding much more shoulder-friendly finish positions as you work on your mobility. Focus on sets of 8 reps or less.

4 of 11

3. Turkish Getup

Edgar Artiga

Let’s face it: You’ve heard about the Turkish Getup before, probably several times. Chances are, you’ve written it off as useless too, since it’s not a squat, deadlift, or chinup. But where conditioning, general joint health, and mobility are concerned, you can’t get much better. Whether you’re someone specifically looking for the above, or you’re a meathead with plenty of restrictions, you’re going to benefit from doing these to help open you up and jack-up your heart rate in the process. A great basic conditioning guide would be to start with any weight (kettlebell, dumbbell, or sandbag) you want, and do 5 minutes straight, alternating arms each time. Take a 2-minute break between rounds, and continue for as many rounds as you can. Too easy? Just increase the weight, and decrease your rest interval between rounds by 30 seconds.

5 of 11

4. Hanging Legs Raise

Per Bernal / M+F Magazine

Doing hanging legs raises instead of situps, crunch variations, or rope flexions for the abs are not only more challenging but also healthier. Especially if you’re a big guy, it takes a lot to hang from a bar and use your core to pull your heavy legs up to the chest for reps. But the added benefit of choosing this move is the fact that your ribcage and thoracic region don’t lose their position of extension. It’s one of the few trunk flexion movements that actually works from the bottom-up and not the top-down, promoting the maintenance of good posture and no strain on the neck and thoracic vertebrae. If true hanging legs raises are a bit too tough, there’s no shame investing in sleeves to attach to your pullup bar to support your upper arms while performing the movement.

6 of 11

5. Floor Press

YouTube / boyceperformance

Floor presses can serve as a supplement to your chest and triceps training, or a complete substitute for your bench press for a lifter with cranky shoulders. The fact that the elbows are blocked by the floor prevent joint discomfort from a deep finish position, and the fact that dumbbells are being used allows for changes in elbow positioning, so a lifter can find his sweet spot that causes no pain. As a bonus, each arm has to work for itself, without the presence of legs drive, which can prove deadly for chest and triceps stimulation.

7 of 11

6. Paused Back Squat

Per Bernal / M+F Magazine

If you’re on this site, chances are you already back squat. If you want a humbling experience to be made even more humbling, add 2-second pauses at the bottom of each rep. Something so simple is so effective at building muscle and making light weight feel heavy, due to the removal of any momentum or transfer of forces. It makes each rep much more “honest” and reliant on true strength, and not exchanges of energy. Be prepared to lower the weight you’re lifting by about 20% if you’re looking to match your typical rep ranges.

8 of 11

7. Z Press

YouTube / Lee Boyce

Speaking of honesty, it’s already a rarity to see people strict barbell overhead pressing at most commercial gyms. But asking for proper form in that movement is equivalent to asking too much. The Z press allows for no shortcuts to be made, since the seated position eliminates the potential for a “push off” or legs drive, and there’s no backrest to the seat either. That means your hip mobility has to be on point to create a neutral spine position while sitting tall. If you can’t achieve this, it’ll show right away. Moreover, a seated overhead position asks for healthy shoulders, or else the bar will end up in front of the body. A quick tip for people who aren’t mobile enough: Try sitting on a step platform to start; the hips will be more open and this will make it easier to keep a neutral spine.

9 of 11

8. Overhead Squat

YouTube / boyceperformance

Sparingly applying overhead squats to your routine is a good way to gauge your general mobility and give your conditioning a kick while you’re at it. As I said, it’s not recommended as a main lift, but is worth its weight in gold when applied correctly. This movement exploits shoulder, hip, ankle, knee, and lumbar restriction the second you do your first rep (and there’s a reason it’s the first test in the popular FMS assessment protocol). Remember to squeeze outward on the bar as hard as possible while keeping it over the mid foot the entire time.

10 of 11

9. Kettlebell Angled Press

YouTube / boyceperformance

To target the mid back and lower traps, the angled press works well since the deltoids don’t get much chance to enter the movement and take it over. Starting with a tucked position close to the chest, aim to maintain the same angle of the torso with the arms (like an extension of the torso itself), and hold position for a full second before sliding the weight back in. Compare this movement to a face pull or trap raise, and you’ll note that in both cases the deltoids get the chance to contribute concentrically to the lift. Eliminating this from the start by using constant tension is the key here.

11 of 11

10. Eccentric Pullup

Matthew Leete / Getty

Most people who say they can crack out dozens of chin- or pullups in a row are lying about it, especially when reviewing good form. But whether you’re good at pullups or not, exploiting the negative reps will prove challenging mentally and physically, while delivering huge benefits for hypertrophy and strength. The fast-twitch fibers get trained a whole lot more when slowing down eccentric phases of training, so gunning for 5-second, negative-only chinups have many pros, and very few cons. Use them for sets of 6-8 reps at any point in your workout.

Previous Next

from Bodybuilding Feed http://www.muscleandfitness.com/workouts/workout-tips/10-toughest-moves-master via http://www.rssmix.com/

[itsjaybullme]

10 of the Toughest Moves to Master

1 of 11

Challenge Yourself

Westend61 / Getty

It’s easy to get stuck in a world of redundancy in the weight room, and if you’re anything like me, you’re quick to default to the stuff you’re good at before challenging yourself with what you know will do your body good. It takes real discipline and a much needed ego check to humble yourself and submit to an exercise that delivers plenty of bang for the buck—even if that means the amount you can lift is pitiful.

On that note, here are 10 moves that should make your list when it comes to delivering a challenge that you probably need.

FEATURED WORKOUT: SUMMER SHRED 2017>>

2 of 11

1. Front Squat

Edgar Artiga

This may not seem like it belongs on this list, let alone first—but rest assured that this movement is not only underused, it’s also underappreciated. People often avoid the front squat because it’s just plain harder to do, making lift numbers suffer. If it’s not that, they avoid it due to it exposing plenty of mobility restrictions throughout the body. Since we’re not here to inflate the ego, it’s worth gaining the requisite mobility and strength to perform these well. Do your best to use a clean grip, to avoid imbalances.

3 of 11

2. Dumbbell Snatch

Marc Royce

The Olympic lifts are demanding, complex movements that are suitable for a very select crowd of weight-training enthusiasts and athletes. However, the demographic opens up drastically when simplifying one of these lifts to a single dumbbell variation. People who have difficulty with overhead squats or general shoulder issues may not fare too well with traditional barbell snatches. Grabbing a moderate to heavy dumbbell and performing snatches with one hand allows a lifter to trigger similar explosiveness while finding much more shoulder-friendly finish positions as you work on your mobility. Focus on sets of 8 reps or less.

4 of 11

3. Turkish Getup

Edgar Artiga

Let’s face it: You’ve heard about the Turkish Getup before, probably several times. Chances are, you’ve written it off as useless too, since it’s not a squat, deadlift, or chinup. But where conditioning, general joint health, and mobility are concerned, you can’t get much better. Whether you’re someone specifically looking for the above, or you’re a meathead with plenty of restrictions, you’re going to benefit from doing these to help open you up and jack-up your heart rate in the process. A great basic conditioning guide would be to start with any weight (kettlebell, dumbbell, or sandbag) you want, and do 5 minutes straight, alternating arms each time. Take a 2-minute break between rounds, and continue for as many rounds as you can. Too easy? Just increase the weight, and decrease your rest interval between rounds by 30 seconds.

5 of 11

4. Hanging Legs Raise

Per Bernal / M+F Magazine

Doing hanging legs raises instead of situps, crunch variations, or rope flexions for the abs are not only more challenging but also healthier. Especially if you’re a big guy, it takes a lot to hang from a bar and use your core to pull your heavy legs up to the chest for reps. But the added benefit of choosing this move is the fact that your ribcage and thoracic region don’t lose their position of extension. It’s one of the few trunk flexion movements that actually works from the bottom-up and not the top-down, promoting the maintenance of good posture and no strain on the neck and thoracic vertebrae. If true hanging legs raises are a bit too tough, there’s no shame investing in sleeves to attach to your pullup bar to support your upper arms while performing the movement.

6 of 11

5. Floor Press

YouTube / boyceperformance

Floor presses can serve as a supplement to your chest and triceps training, or a complete substitute for your bench press for a lifter with cranky shoulders. The fact that the elbows are blocked by the floor prevent joint discomfort from a deep finish position, and the fact that dumbbells are being used allows for changes in elbow positioning, so a lifter can find his sweet spot that causes no pain. As a bonus, each arm has to work for itself, without the presence of legs drive, which can prove deadly for chest and triceps stimulation.

7 of 11

6. Paused Back Squat

Per Bernal / M+F Magazine

If you’re on this site, chances are you already back squat. If you want a humbling experience to be made even more humbling, add 2-second pauses at the bottom of each rep. Something so simple is so effective at building muscle and making light weight feel heavy, due to the removal of any momentum or transfer of forces. It makes each rep much more “honest” and reliant on true strength, and not exchanges of energy. Be prepared to lower the weight you’re lifting by about 20% if you’re looking to match your typical rep ranges.

8 of 11

7. Z Press

YouTube / Lee Boyce

Speaking of honesty, it’s already a rarity to see people strict barbell overhead pressing at most commercial gyms. But asking for proper form in that movement is equivalent to asking too much. The Z press allows for no shortcuts to be made, since the seated position eliminates the potential for a “push off” or legs drive, and there’s no backrest to the seat either. That means your hip mobility has to be on point to create a neutral spine position while sitting tall. If you can’t achieve this, it’ll show right away. Moreover, a seated overhead position asks for healthy shoulders, or else the bar will end up in front of the body. A quick tip for people who aren’t mobile enough: Try sitting on a step platform to start; the hips will be more open and this will make it easier to keep a neutral spine.

9 of 11

8. Overhead Squat

YouTube / boyceperformance

Sparingly applying overhead squats to your routine is a good way to gauge your general mobility and give your conditioning a kick while you’re at it. As I said, it’s not recommended as a main lift, but is worth its weight in gold when applied correctly. This movement exploits shoulder, hip, ankle, knee, and lumbar restriction the second you do your first rep (and there’s a reason it’s the first test in the popular FMS assessment protocol). Remember to squeeze outward on the bar as hard as possible while keeping it over the mid foot the entire time.

10 of 11

9. Kettlebell Angled Press

YouTube / boyceperformance

To target the mid back and lower traps, the angled press works well since the deltoids don’t get much chance to enter the movement and take it over. Starting with a tucked position close to the chest, aim to maintain the same angle of the torso with the arms (like an extension of the torso itself), and hold position for a full second before sliding the weight back in. Compare this movement to a face pull or trap raise, and you’ll note that in both cases the deltoids get the chance to contribute concentrically to the lift. Eliminating this from the start by using constant tension is the key here.

11 of 11

10. Eccentric Pullup

Matthew Leete / Getty

Most people who say they can crack out dozens of chin- or pullups in a row are lying about it, especially when reviewing good form. But whether you’re good at pullups or not, exploiting the negative reps will prove challenging mentally and physically, while delivering huge benefits for hypertrophy and strength. The fast-twitch fibers get trained a whole lot more when slowing down eccentric phases of training, so gunning for 5-second, negative-only chinups have many pros, and very few cons. Use them for sets of 6-8 reps at any point in your workout.

Previous Next

from Bodybuilding Feed http://www.muscleandfitness.com/workouts/workout-tips/10-toughest-moves-master via http://www.rssmix.com/