#but was so relieved when i saw switzerland won | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

josefavomjaaga · 3 years

Text

Helfert, “Joachim Murat”, Chapter 4, Part 5

We left Murat after the defeat of Tolentino and now have a look at what was going on with the other King of the Two Sicilies, the one actually sitting in Sicily, Ferdinand.

Among the motives that led Joachim to consider a speedy retreat to Naples was the impending danger from Sicily.

There were still British garrisons on the island, and Ferdinand IV himself desired it, although he was almost constantly at odds with their leaders, and especially with England's diplomatic representative. A'Court was full of complaints about him. "The foundations of the constitution," he had written to Castlereagh on January 5, 1815, "or rather I should say its rhymes, for it has never had any foundations, are being swept out of the way on all sides, and it appears as if, as soon as Naples is won again, everything will revert to a mild despotism, or else, if the court does not succeed in this, will take on a strictly aristocratic character and make the already overconfident barons fully masters of the king as well as of the people." The parliament had recently convened on October 22, 1814, and had been in session for months into 1815, constantly preoccupied with the financial question, which it had been unable to resolve satisfactorily. There had been some of the most heated exchanges; one day towards the end of January, the deputies literally got into each other's hair, so that the guards had to intervene to break them up. When the English had cancelled the King's subsidies of 400,000 pounds sterling annually, which were to be discontinued on 1 March, the matter had become so urgent that Ferdinand IV had had to resort to an extraordinary measure, which, as we remember, was taken on both sides of the Faro at times of need. By royal decree of 18 February, until the parliament had succeeded in restoring financial order, the salaries of all civil servants and officers due at the end of the month had been suspended, which not only exposed the majority of those initially affected to bitter shortages and worries, but in its further consequences also had a terrible effect on public safety; hardly a night went by in Palermo without houses being broken into, the inhabitants robbed, everything that could be carried away stolen, so that all better-off families were in constant fear of their lives. But all these sufferings and worries now took a back seat to the greater events taking place on the mainland, which were bound to change the situation on the island.

On April 29th, an alliance treaty was concluded in Vienna between Austria, with the accession of Russia and Prussia on the one hand, and the Court of Palermo on the other, by virtue of which the latter, represented by Prince Leopold and Commander Ruffo, undertook to put 30,000 men into the field and to bear all the costs of the campaign. In the second article, the conditions were expressed under which Ferdinand was to take over the government of Naples again: no investigation and persecution, recognition of the sale of state property, guarantee of public debt, keeping the new (Buonapartist) nobility on an equal footing with the old, and generally maintaining all the honours, promotions and pensions conferred by the previous governments. On the evening of May 4, the Prince and the Minister departed from Vienna, and from that moment there was no longer a "King Joachim", no longer a "Queen Caroline", but only a "Mme Murat", a "Marshal Murat", of whom Castlereagh said in the British Parliament that he owed his fall only to the ambiguity of his attitude: "if his sentiments could have been relied upon, he would not have been deprived of his crown". In Bianchi's main quarters, in accordance with the instructions received from Vienna, the royal title was still maintained; only Lord Burghersh, following the example of his compatriot Bentinck, did not allow himself to be deprived of speaking of anything other than "Marshal Murat", even in official dispatches.

On April 30, the day after the Treaty of Vienna, of which Palermo was of course not yet aware, the king announced his imminent departure for Naples in a solemn parliamentary session and demanded the necessary means, which the Estates willingly provided. To his Neapolitans, however, Ferdinand issued a manifesto, dated May 1st, which his supporters were to smuggle in and distribute in both Calabria and the other provinces as well as in the capital. Mistakes that had been made were deplored without any intention of punishing them; peace and harmony, general forgiveness and forgetting, the retention of all civil servants and officers in their ranks were promised; laws were envisaged that would serve as a basis for future state institutions and as a guarantee of civil liberties. Ferdinand did not wish to wait for the final outcome of the war before preparing to sail to Naples; he decided to go to Messina for the time being in order to be closer to the development of events.

A British fleet of 20 warships of various sizes under Admiral Bellew sailed in the Tyrrhenian Sea and kept an eye on the coasts of the mainland.

In Naples, after the first unfavourable news had arrived in April, extensive precautions had been taken to put the capital and Capua in a state of defence, especially Gaëta, where a whole suburb was razed, all the inhabitants who did not know how to provide themselves with food for months were expelled from the city, and the government palace was prepared to receive the royal family. But all these measures, initiated with strength and prudence under the rule of the regent, could no longer help a cause which made the rampant licentiousness in the ranks of the army appear to be already lost.

On May 4, after the second day of the battle of Tolentino, the general retreat of the royals had begun, more sinister than the previous defeat. The Carafa brigade disobeyed its commander and the soldiers ran in groups towards the Neapolitan frontier. General Lecchi had to report to the king that he was no longer able to keep his soldiers in obedience; the situation was no better with the legion of the wounded d'Ambrosio; Carascosa alone led his "legion" back in good order. The closer they came to the borders of their homeland, the more numerous the deserters became. The onset of severe frost, "not like in the Italian spring but like in the gruesome winter of Switzerland", as Colletta puts it, plus heavy rain that drove all the water over the banks and thus caused stagnation in the columns, were as much occasions as cloaks for the desertion. With bitter sorrow, the king saw such a beautiful army, his pride and his joy, disappear before his eyes, dissolve into its components; his otherwise cheerful countenance, smiling happily for everyone approaching, was now darkened by heavy grief and large tears streamed from his eyes down his cheeks. It was at the passage over the Tronto, at the border of his kingdom, which he was to cross again as a defeated man, where the word "abdicate" was spoken before him for the first time. In the first surge of his anger he wanted to strike down with his own hand the general d'Aquine, who had hitherto always played the humble servant; but he restrained himself and merely relieved him of the command which he had not held with great glory. The king, for his own part, even in this ignominious retreat, often performed miracles of valour. General Colletta relates an instance in which the king, who was brave to the last moment and the last in the train, helped with his own hand to barricade a road at the entrance of which a detachment of Austrian cavalry was charging and firing. But Joachim could not be everywhere, and where he was not, there was nothing but disaster. The imperials made one capture after another. At Lanciano, 23 cannons, 10 howitzers, 20 ammunition carts and their crew fell into their hands. Manhès, who was only strong when he was raging, abandoned his position at the Garigliano, the important border river, on 6 May, without having seen anything of the enemy, so that the Queen relieved him of his command and persuaded the Minister of War to take his place in the field. On May 10, Joachim was in Bopoli, on the 11th he held a review of his troops; he still had 14,000 men with 16 guns. But already the apostasy in the provinces began to spread, which also had an effect on the ranks of the army. In those days, an appeal arrived from Isernia from the sub-intendant Milizia, in which the soldiers were called upon to abandon Murat's cause. When the king heard of this he exclaimed painfully, "And I, who have done nothing but good to this man!" He made a last attempt to retain the loyalty of his people and sent the General and State Councillor Colletta to the capital, where, together with Minister Zurlo, he was to draft the outlines of a constitutional charter; but Joachim urged them not to be too generous with the concessions to the people.

#joachim murat #caroline murat #naples #naples1815 #ferdinand de bourbon #napoleon #helfert murat #italy1815

15 notes · View notes

doux-amer · 3 years

Text

My thoughts on today:

So we have both the World Cup and Euro winners out now in Euro 2020 (good riddance as both were boring and I will never accept how both of them won World Cup ‘18 and Euro ‘16) and I'm thriving off the chaos ksdajfdlaksjfkas. Spain–Croatia:

I continue to be exasperated with Alvaro Morata, but good for him that he of all people scored the goal to turn the tide because as much as I think he’s not worth it, he absolutely doesn’t deserve the abuse he’s received from the public

When Riqui Puig joins the senior Spain NT and Ansu Fati is fit again, it's all over for other European NTs!!!!!

Spain is out here breaking records!

LOVE THIS FOR PEDRI WHO IS SHOWING THE WORLD WHAT A SUPERSTAR HE IS. HE’S BEEN WONDERFUL FOR SPAIN AND HE’S ONLY 18. 18!!!!! MY LITTLE BABY!!!!!!!!!! LOOK AT HIM!

Got annoyed at people saying Spain is utter shit after years of going “Yeah, unfortunately, they’re meh and I can’t break up with them” because they’re not. Spain has been playing well since Busquets came back from testing negative for covid lol. The only big weakness they have (other than the lack of talented, consistent strikers) is when they start playing too slowly on the ball in their own half and end up making holes in their defense which is frustrating to watch, but Spain is one of the youngest NTs in the Euros so they need to gain more experience. And tbh considering Spain won both of their last matches with five goals, I think they can squeak by with not having a true reliable striker like Villa or Fernando Torres. Not ideal, but it's still doable. Their defense worries me though. I got so impatient when they kept the ball near the box instead of trying to move forward and were slow in multiple matches. Lucho needs to drill some sense into them.

Look, they're actually a very promising side. They're just undercooked and understandably so, but they're not bad by any means. They're wobbly this Euros, but I'm really looking forward to seeing what's in store if the team can gel together under Lucho

Please say sike...between this and Sid Lowe saying, “[Busquets] is the only man left from the team that won the 2010 World Cup," I felt ancient

Unai Simon has been good this tournament, but I wanted to astral project myself off the face of this planet when he made that bizarre beginner’s mistake. Imagine being Pedri and getting an own goal because Unai did that...but alksjdlfjasdlkfas for pure chaos, I loved it (because Spain ended up winning). So many own goals this tournament! So much drama! We’ve truly seen everything, and there’s more to come. I was here for everyone saying they wouldn’t have put it past De Gea and Kepa to make the same mistake and I’m inclined to agree. I never fully trusted De Gea or saw him as the true successor to Iker. :/ But anyway, Unai was one of the players keeping Spain alive and he’s been good so I’m okay with him!

France–Switzerland:

France deserve to go out because Switzerland played well this match and France has been not only mediocre and anemic but possibly one of the most boring sides as well this Euros lmao bye

France had to get knocked out at some point because the idea of France winning another title with Benzema on the squad was too much for me

As everyone pointed out, France has a surplus of excellent players, more than any other NT, but Deschamps is so conservative and doesn't let them be as fun and brilliant as they can be because they can afford not to. I LOATHE that mindset so I'm not sad to see France leave. Replace Deschamps with a manager who can take advantage of a squad that includes Mbappe, Pogba, Kante, etc. or not because then I'll suffer an identity crisis because I hate France, but I like a lot of the players on the French NT

Happy for the Swiss getting to the quarterfinals for the first time! Happy for Big Shaq!

The Swiss were really good and fought to the end just like Croatia and I love both NTs showing that kind of spirit.

Plus as a neutral (jk, a neutral that hates France, but I didn’t expect France to leave before getting to the quarterfinals), I love the chaos and finally, FINALLY, we got to penalties.

And others:

Patrik Schick needs to get two more goals so Penaldo can't get the Golden Boot (unless someone else overtakes him and Penaldo, which I'm okay with too although Schick hasn’t had one bad goal this tournament!)

If you want to talk about NTs that actually do suck, there are two examples I can point to that are better choices than Spain: Belgium and the Netherlands. Can you believe FIFA keeps ranking Belgium as #1? In what world????? If you want to talk about bad NTs that shouldn't be bad, Belgium and the Netherlands are on the top of my list. The Netherlands went out yesterday and deservedly so (sorry, Frenkie and Gini). Maybe they'll regroup and come back, but I'm relieved they didn't advance in a way because if they end up going far in a tournament, I want Virgil to be there although that will be bad for me as a Dutch NT hater. Belgium has consistently been overhyped and for what? Take out KDB and Lukaku and it’s a snoozefest. They’ve never actually been good for as long as people kept hyping them up, and I really don’t get why people continue to do so when they’ve never lived up to expectations.

6 notes · View notes

pamphletstoinspire · 6 years

Photo

A Padre Pio Inspirational Story

John McCaffery - Part 1

John McCaffery was a man of many talents and accomplishments. In different periods of his life he had worked as a writer, a university professor, a journalist, and a business man. In Donegal, Ireland, he tried his hand at farming, which he enjoyed very much.

During World War II, John lived in Switzerland where he was the head of an underground resistance operation against the Nazis. It was in Switzerland that he first heard about Padre Pio. One day John’s confessor, Father Rizzi, gave him a book about Padre Pio. He told John that Padre Pio had the stigmata as well as many other extraordinary spiritual gifts. John accepted the book but knew that he would not read it. For one thing, John had always been skeptical about so called mystics and from what Father Rizzi told him, Padre Pio definitely seemed to be in that category. John’s intellectual mind set made him suspicious of any kind of supernatural phenomenon. As far as he was concerned, mysticism was something to be avoided. The book on Padre Pio would remain on his shelf, but he knew he would not open it.

The next conversation that John had regarding Padre Pio happened when World War II was coming to a close. John’s confessor at that time was a Capuchin priest in Milan, Italy named Father Gian Antonio. Father Gian Antonio told John that he had visited Padre Pio in San Giovanni Rotondo on one occasion.

During his visit, Father Gian Antonio noticed the great respect which every one of the Capuchins demonstrated toward Padre Pio. He told John that it was very impressive. He reasoned that the Capuchins who lived with Padre Pio on a daily basis knew him like no one else. Since their esteem for him was so obvious and so sincere, it was a good indication that Padre Pio was a holy priest. When Father Gian Antonio made his confession to Padre Pio, he experienced a deep and profound sense of peace.

After sharing his story, Father Gian Antonio gave John two photographs of Padre Pio. Still, John’s heart was unmoved. As time passed, other people spoke to John about Padre Pio. A friend invited him to go to San Giovanni Rotondo to attend Padre Pio’s Mass. John was not enthusiastic about the idea. Why should he travel such a long distance to attend Padre Pio’s Mass? There were many Catholic churches where John lived in Milan and Mass was said every day. Although he was reluctant to accept the invitation, John finally agreed to accompany his friend to San Giovanni Rotondo. He had been hearing about Padre Pio from various friends and associates for at least ten years.

All of John’s doubts about Padre Pio disappeared when he attended his Mass. Padre Pio radiated an aura of sanctity. The way in which he pronounced the sacred invocations had a powerful effect on John. Every word was spoken slowly and solemnly. The majority of those in attendance were poor people — farmers, laborers, and people of the working-class. John observed that all who were present seemed to be aware of the sacredness of the Mass.

On his first visit to San Giovanni Rotondo, John and several others were invited to visit Padre Pio in his cell. They were able to converse with him for over an hour. When it was time to say goodbye, John was reluctant to leave. Meeting Padre Pio and attending his Mass had been a far greater experience than he had ever imagined.

Three times a year, John traveled from Ireland to Milan, Italy where he had business interests. He would stay in Milan for six weeks at a time before returning to his family in Ireland. After his first visit to Padre Pio, whenever he could break free from his work, he would travel by train from Milan to San Giovanni Rotondo.

John soon became a familiar face at the monastery. Through his visits, he became acquainted with many of the Capuchins who lived with Padre Pio. Giovanni Vignolini, Padre Pio’s infirmarian, was one of them. Giovanni had access to Padre Pio’s cell at all times. He cared for Padre Pio whenever he was ill, which was often. He also assisted Padre Pio in taking care of the wounds of his stigmata. Giovanni frequently allowed John to accompany him to Padre Pio’s cell. Whenever John was with Giovanni, he was able to walk right past the monastery porter without being stopped and turned around.

As time passed, and through many visits, John and Padre Pio became very close. Often, when John’s friends learned that he was making a trip to San Giovanni Rotondo, they asked him to relay their prayer requests to Padre Pio. John knew that Padre Pio’s time was very limited. John came up with a good plan. Before he spoke to Padre Pio, he spent some time in silence in the church of Our Lady of Grace. One by one, he would recall each one of his friends to mind as well as their prayer requests. Then, when he saw Padre Pio, he would simply say, “I have these prayer intentions in my heart, not only my own, but also those of my friends, and I would like to ask for your prayers.”

On one occasion, John realized that he had made a mistake when he asked Padre Pio to pray for the intentions of his friends. As he was mentally going over the list, he had accidentally forgotten two individuals who had asked to be remembered in prayer. When John realized his error, he decided to tell Padre Pio. Before he could say a word, Padre Pio said to him, “Oh yes, don’t worry. I am going to pray for those two as well.”

John soon learned that nothing could be hidden from Padre Pio. He frequently read John’s mind by telling him exactly what he had been thinking. From time to time, Padre Pio would relate to John what John had been discussing with the other Capuchins. Even though Padre Pio had not been present during the discussions, he somehow knew all the details and could repeat the conversations almost verbatim.

Without ever seeing John’s business calendar, Padre Pio at times, would remind him of the appointments he had scheduled for the upcoming week. In addition, when John was struggling with a difficult personal problem, Padre Pio always seemed to be aware of it. John never had to explain anything to him. Sometimes Padre Pio gave John advice that did not seem quite up to the mark. But John soon learned that if he followed the advice, things would always work out to his best advantage.

On one occasion, Padre Pio said to John, “You have spent your life traveling from one country to another. Since the time of your childhood, I bet that you have never spent more than seven years in any one given place.” Later, John thought about what Padre Pio had said. When he did some calculations, he realized that Padre Pio had been right. Throughout his life, John had spent almost seven years exactly, living in one particular area before relocating to the next.

Those who were close to Padre Pio were well aware of his remarkable intuitive knowledge. Even though Padre Pio did not listen to the radio, read the newspaper, or watch television, he always seemed to have a complete grasp on world affairs. He could discuss international politics with remarkable insight. At times, he knew the contents of letters he had received, that is, before opening them. On one occasion, when Padre Pio was sick in bed, one of the Capuchins brought a number of letters and packages to him to be blessed. He blessed all but one item, which was an envelope. “I am not going to be able to bless that,” Padre Pio said as he pointed to the envelope. It aroused the curiosity of the Capuchins who were present in his cell. They later discovered that the envelope in question contained a betting ticket for the football game. Whoever had slipped it in with the other letters, obviously did not realize that Padre Pio refused to bless gambling ventures.

When John was a professor at the Genoa University in Italy, one of his students had a brother who decided to test Padre Pio’s powers of discernment. In the confessional, he told Padre Pio that he was there, not to confess his sins, but to ask for prayers for one of his sick relatives. It was not true. The young man did not have any sick relatives. The moment the words escaped his lips, Padre Pio became angry and ordered him out of the confessional. The young man soon realized the error of his ways. Not long after, he returned to Padre Pio’s confessional and apologized. He then made a sincere confession.

At the time of John’s visits, Mass was still said in the small church of Our Lady of Grace. On seven occasions, John had the blessing to be the altar server at Padre Pio’s Mass. One time, one of John’s friends hired a professional photographer to take pictures, not only of the Mass, but also of John assisting Padre Pio as altar server. He knew that John would treasure the photos. Padre Pio noticed the photographer in the church before the Mass started and spoke to him. He gave him permission to take no more than two photos. The photographer happily agreed. But the temptation to take more than two photographs evidently won out. During the Mass, he used two rolls of film. When he went to develop them, every picture came out blank.

Even though John would have loved to have had a photograph taken while he was serving Padre Pio’s Mass, he possessed something which he cherished even more — a precious relic of Padre Pio. It was a piece of bloodstained bandage that had covered his stigmata. It had originally belonged to one of the Capuchins in San Giovanni Rotondo. How the Capuchin came to possess the relic is a story in itself.

One day, the Capuchin asked Padre Pio if he would like him to carry some water to his cell. Padre Pio was happy for him to do so. However, the Capuchin had ulterior motives. He was hoping to find a relic in Padre Pio’s cell. He took the water to his cell, and once inside, he spotted some of the bandages that Padre Pio had used to cover his stigmata. He quickly pocketed them and was relieved that Padre Pio had not seen what he had done. Obtaining a relic was much easier than he had ever imagined. He decided to try his luck for a second time. The next evening, the Capuchin spoke to Padre Pio and offered once again to carry water to his cell. “Absolutely not!” Padre Pio replied. “I have a great distaste for thieves!”

On one occasion, when John was conversing with one of his business associates, he experienced the charismatic perfume of Padre Pio. At the time, his business associate was having more than his share of personal problems. While they were talking, John was wondering to himself whether he should say something about Padre Pio. The man was not a Catholic and John was certain that he knew nothing about Padre Pio. While John was turning the idea over in his mind, he suddenly perceived a beautiful fragrance of perfume. He believed that the fragrance was Padre Pio’s way of saying, “Yes, you should say something.” The man was very receptive and seemed genuinely interested in what John shared with him about Padre Pio.

John’s wife also experienced the extraordinary perfume of Padre Pio. On one occasion, while John was in Milan, Mrs. McCaffery wrote to him from Ireland, telling him of a problem concerning one of the family members. Shortly after she sent the letter, she became aware of a beautiful perfume that pervaded her home. She immediately thought to herself, “This is Padre Pio. He must be aware of the letter that I just sent.”

Shortly after that, John and his friend Piero Pellizzari were visiting Padre Pio one day at the monastery. Piero said to Padre Pio, “John’s wife had a wonderful experience. She became aware of your presence by the sign of perfume. It happened at her home in Ireland.” Padre Pio then looked at John and said to him very gently, “John, even beyond the sea.” He was referring to the fact that there were no barriers that prevented him from being with his spiritual children, wherever they might be.

Once, John met an American priest at the monastery. He told John that his short encounter with Padre Pio had been very disappointing. He had been offended by Padre Pio’s brusque manner. He told John that he would never again return to the monastery of Our Lady of Grace. Padre Pio had been rude to him in front of a number of people and what was worse, had declined to hear his confession. The priest was angry as well as hurt.

John told the priest that in the past, he too had occasionally experienced Padre Pio’s apparent coldness. Of course it was not a pleasant experience, but John had reflected on it and had been able to draw some conclusions. John realized that when Padre Pio treated him in a cold manner, the problem was with him and not with Padre Pio. It happened when there were sins in John’s life. John was very much aware of those sins and he knew by experience that they could not be hidden from Padre Pio. John told the young priest, “In my own case, I feel that if Padre Pio wanted to walk all over me, I would lie down on the ground and invite him to start walking.”

The priest listened with attention to what John told him and seemed very satisfied with the explanation. The next day, he was able to visit Padre Pio in his cell and make his confession. It turned out to be a grace-filled experience. Padre Pio accepted the priest as his spiritual son and a strong and lasting bond of friendship developed between the two.

John met another man in San Giovanni Rotondo who, like the American priest, found his first meeting with Padre Pio to be more than a little upsetting. The man was an industrialist from northern Italy. Thirty years before, he had come across a book on Padre Pio almost by accident. He found the book in a hotel where he was staying, and having nothing better to do, he read it. After he finished the book, he never gave it a second thought.

Later, the man became involved in spiritualism and took it upon himself to share his knowledge about the subject with his family. One of his sons took great interest in spiritualism and eventually became a proficient and successful spiritual medium. But tragedy struck the family when his son had a nervous breakdown. He finally had to be committed to a mental institution. His father was distraught, and while trying to think of a way to help his son, he remembered the book on Padre Pio that he had read some thirty years before. He decided to travel to San Giovanni Rotondo and speak to Padre Pio about his son.

At the monastery of Our Lady of Grace, he was able to see Padre Pio. But before he could explain the tragic situation, Padre Pio said to him sternly, “You jeopardize the life of your son and then you have the nerve to come to this monastery! How could you do that?” The man was shocked and angered. He left San Giovanni Rotondo and vowed to himself that he would never return. But later, having no other ideas regarding how to help his son, the man decided to visit Padre Pio again.

The second visit to the monastery was no better than the first. There were no words of consolation from Padre Pio, no offer of assistance, no sign of hope. His son’s condition showed no improvement. The man returned a third time to see Padre Pio. On his third visit, Padre Pio spoke to him and told him that his son would indeed get his mental faculties back. The words proved to be prophetic for his son’s condition began to improve. He made a complete recovery and was able to live a normal life, free from any mental impairment.

The man continued to visit San Giovanni Rotondo whenever he was able to. One day he was standing in the church near the area where Padre Pio was hearing the women’s confessions. Several times, Padre Pio looked up from the confessional and stared at him. Every time he did so, the man lowered his eyes. Finally, the man reasoned to himself, “Why am I lowering my eyes each time that Padre Pio looks at me? It makes no sense. If he looks my way again, I am going to look right back at him.” Padre Pio looked at him once again, and true to his word, the man stared right back at him. As he did so, it was as though two flames shot out of Padre Pio’s eyes, as if to consume him. He lowered his eyes immediately.

Once, on the eve of the feast of St. John the Baptist, John McCaffery and several others were engaged in a conversation with Padre Pio. They were standing together in the hallway right outside Padre Pio’s cell. “Well, John,” Padre Pio said, “since you share the same name as St. John, tomorrow is your feast day too. I will be praying for you as well as for your wife and children tomorrow at the Mass.” Padre Pio bid goodbye to the other men he had been talking with and invited John to come inside his cell to visit. However, on that particular night, John noticed that Padre Pio looked very ill. He was deathly pale and seemed completely drained of strength. Just as John entered the cell, Padre Pio started to faint. Luckily, John caught him before he hit the ground and was able to help him to a chair.

As Padre Pio rested in the chair, John noticed that his ankles and feet were very swollen. One of the Capuchins once described Padre Pio’s feet as looking like “two watermelons,” because of the swelling. Padre Pio’s personal attendant said that he was in a panic whenever he had to help Padre Pio put on his shoes. The slightest touch to his instep always caused him great pain.

John told Padre Pio how sorry he was to see that he was sick. He told him that he should try to get some rest as the hot temperatures of the summer months were upon them. The recent days had been particularly hot and uncomfortable. “It is not the days so much as the nights that cause me suffering,” Padre Pio said to John. Padre Pio held up his hands covered with the woolen half-gloves and confided to John, “The pain in these hands becomes so intense at night that it is hard for me to sleep.”

The next day, John visited Padre Pio in his cell once again. He seemed to be feeling much better. “On this feast day of St. John the Baptist,” John said, “I wonder if I could ask you for a favor?” “What favor would you like to ask of me?” Padre Pio asked. “I would like you to sign a holy card for me,” John replied. Padre Pio was happy to do so. John noticed that it was very difficult for him to hold a pen. The wound in his hand made it hard for him to wrap his fingers around it. It was also difficult for him to write legibly. John noticed by the expression on Padre Pio’s face that it was painful for him to write. Although John treasured the holy card, after seeing what it cost Padre Pio to write the personal message, he regretted that he had asked him for the favor.

John, on one occasion, felt an overwhelming desire to see Padre Pio. It was on the feast of Corpus Christi. John decided to take the train to San Giovanni Rotondo, even though he knew he would have to catch a train and return to Milan that very evening. He felt that if he could see Padre Pio that day, it would be well worth the long hours of travel time.

The feast of Corpus Christi was indeed a magnificent celebration in San Giovanni Rotondo. A full band ensemble provided the music while young girls in beautiful white dresses led the large outdoor procession, strewing flowers along the processional path. The Blessed Sacrament followed behind under its traditional canopy.

John had arrived in San Giovanni Rotondo in ample time and was in the church well before the festivities began. Unfortunately, he had not been able to see Padre Pio like he had hoped to. An announcement was made in the church that instructed everyone, both clergy and laity, to exit the church and assemble outside. The Corpus Christi procession was about to begin. Directly after the procession, John would have to catch the train to return home.

John knew that Padre Pio would not be able to participate in the Corpus Christi celebration that day. It would be impossible for him to walk in the procession. John was certain that Padre Pio would remain inside the monastery. His desire to see Padre Pio was so great that, instead of following the line of people who were exiting the church, he stayed behind. Quietly, and with great care so as not to draw attention to himself, John walked up the stairs that led to the choir loft. He waited there until he was certain that everyone had gone outside. When John was convinced that he was completely alone in the church, he left the choir and made his way to the corridor near Padre Pio’s cell. By positioning himself in the corridor, John would be sure to see Padre Pio if he left his cell for any reason.

As John waited, the thought occurred to him that Padre Pio might be angry with him. He had purposely disobeyed the instructions that had come over the church’s loudspeaker. Instead of exiting the church like all the other people, he had hidden in the choir loft. John knew that Padre Pio had a great respect for rules and made it a point to observe them to the letter. John had seen Padre Pio’s anger on previous occasions. It could be a shattering experience to be the object of his anger. The more John though about it, the more nervous he became. John decided that he better have an explanation ready, a line of defense, just in case he saw Padre Pio and found that he was upset with him. He would tell Padre Pio the truth. He would explain to Padre Pio that he came to the monastery that day because he had a great desire, a great need to see him. If it was simply a matter of attending the Gesu Sacramentato procession, he could have just as easily stayed in Milan. John turned the phrase over in his mind, “Gesu Sacramentato.” He was very pleased with himself for thinking of it. He had never heard it used before.

Suddenly John heard footsteps and then he turned to see Padre Pio coming toward him. John greeted him and said, “I was hoping that I could see you today. I hope you are not upset with me for staying behind in the church.” “No, I am not upset with you,” Padre Pio said. “Let’s go to the sitting room and have a visit.” John breathed a great sigh of relief.

John asked Padre Pio how he was feeling and he replied in his customary manner, “Let us thank God.” He did not like to speak about his health problems. By simply saying “Let us thank God,” to any inquiries about his health, he showed that he left all such concerns in God’s hands.

John and Padre Pio had a long conversation together and when it was finally time to part, Padre Pio said to him, “May the angel of the Lord accompany you always.” With a look of merriment in his eyes, he added, “Before you catch the train to go back to your home, you will have time to participate in the Benediction ceremony outside. The Gesu acramentato procession is just now approaching from the street.” That phrase, “Gesu Sacramentato” that John had been turning over in his mind and to which he felt a certain ownership, evidently had not been hidden from Padre Pio. ________

I feel a great desire to abandon myself with greater trust to the Divine Mercy and to place my hope in God alone. — Padre Pio

#padre pio

6 notes · View notes

worldcakecakecake · 7 years

Text

Good Luck Friedrich

A series of video diaries by Isabella Beilschmidt for her baby brother, Friedrich, where she details and explains the lives of their hectic family.

Managed an update woo! As always, expect slow ones with this story, but since lately I’ve been getting a lot of messages about it, I planned of a way to work on this one quicker after I finish a new thing I’m working on, so you might get the next chapter sooner, but let’s see how that goes. Hope you enjoy!

Video 2

“No, no, no, a nice gentle orange!”

“But we already painted this in baby blue, it won’t match!”

“Oh trust me, my kind of orange will be perfect. Wait till we start mixing and you’ll see what I mean.”

“It better be pretty, because if not, I’ll feel embarrassed walking by this every day.”

“Analiese, you’ll be in Paris by the time we start using it."

“I still have an entire summer here!”

Isabella had enough of this, she switched the camera from the wall her papa and older sister were currently discussing on, to the crib where Friedrich lay, facing the ceiling, ever curious eyes darting every part of the ceiling, room and the dogs that watched around him, his cute little hands and feet wobbling, still testing out his first movements. To Isabella there was nothing more adorable, especially since he was wearing a really small and cute woodland creatures footie pajamas.

“Hi, Friedrich. You are now three weeks old! You see your sister Analiese and Papa there,” she pointed as they began a tracing, and to her surprise, the baby followed the movements, his eyes now frozen on their figure, wobbling more, surely wanting his papa’s attention.

“They’re working on our semester calendar for when school starts again in September…well, for the ones who are staying in Switzerland of course. Papa takes this wall and paints all our schedules into this huge beautiful calendar surrounded by beautiful designs of a theme we all vote on. This time, fairy forest won. It’s a way for us to organize ourselves as well to not forget any of our assignments, plans or even what day were in. He’s being doing this from the moment Heinrich and Alessandro started Kindergarten, and as we got older, we even help him. Maybe one day you’ll help papa and vatti make your own calendars.”

After her explanation, she started pointing the camera around the high ceiling of this living room, the elder walls, the different paintings their papa and the rest had decorated with over the years.

“This is a beautiful place, isn’t it? Large, lively and even strong.” With a little last poke to his nose, she stood and began walking around, introducing the kitchen, the library, the halls, from the ones in the basement as well as the top floors, their views of perfect blue sky, of green hills, colorful fauna, from the distance and even the ones they grew in their garden and yard.

“This place is more than two hundred years old. Vatti used to tell us a story about a powerful woman that used to live here, so selfish and greedy that a witch placed a curse on her to never leave the threshold of her house. Vengeful she was she began to study all kinds of witchcraft to get back at her. Once she learned enough, she challenged the witch on a dual for her freedom and vatti says that a great battle took place in these very hills until she acclaimed her winning. The process helped to make her kinder actually, starting a school to teach little witches and wizards what she learned…but then we told uncle Vash, and he just said that an old noble family used to own it, went broke and just left the house fall to pieces. Yep, the house didn’t use to look like this.”

She pointed the camera around, hoping with the story she was to tell that Friedrich could imagine how broken down it had been once, instead of all this strong wood, paneling, colors, carpets and order that took years to reach.

“You’re lucky you didn’t see it when it was still being worked upon, so the house can be to you from the beginning a strong fortress to protect and grow in and-”

“I’m starting to have second thoughts about this…”

“Oh come on, it won’t be that bad!”

A sling, a throw, a body being hit against the wall, creating a hole, debris falling on the ground, along with a dizzy Aldrich, who groaned and tried to relieve himself from the pain. Isabella was so startled she could only remain still, letting the camera roll and capture this. Alessandro came out the door his younger brother was slung from, panicking, as surprised to a still as Isabella. He was clearly not expecting for this to cause so much damage.

“What just happened?” Analiese shouted as she came up, gasping but quickly being the only one to hurry to Aldrich’s side, to help him up, check on him and embrace away any kind of pain.

After Friedrich started wailing, Feliciano climbed up with the baby in his hold, trying to shush him back to his calm, which was hard to do with the dogs following around and then for all to instantly panic when they saw where Aldrich lay, going to his side to help and inspect the damage. Feliciano quickly calculated and sent a heavy glare in Alessandro’s direction.

“What happened here?” He demanded.

“Uh…” Alessandro was quickly trying to plot something that wouldn’t get him into trouble.

“I have everything tapped. You can’t escape from this one,” Isabella interrupted.

Alessandro groaned but was still too scared to talk.

“Whatever it was, it’s your money we are using to fix this and your vatti will later give you a stern talking to,” their papa warned, beginning to pick some things to clean up as well as filling Aldrich with all kinds of kisses he sometimes wished could heal.

The last thing the camera caught as it turned away was Alessandro’s groan. It now instead focused on Isabella’s still surprised expression, deciding to move away from this commotion and find somewhere silent to begin.

“Okay, so, eighteen years later and the house is still falling apart, but trust me, it’s way better than how it used to be…”

Ludwig and Feliciano had arrived for the first time before the house almost eighteen years ago, on a bad red golf Volkswagen, the cheapest one they could find, with nothing but a couple of bags of clothes and other small items they could take in the small time they had.

Back then, there was no paved entrance, no garden, Feliciano couldn’t even spot the door, only but grass and vines standing tall and wrapping around every available opening of the old decaying house. Feliciano came out from the car and neared, not fearful, finding available spots to enter through the fauna until finally he could reach the door, a heavy lock impeding any kind of trick. Luckily Ludwig had brought a large snip to easily break it, and although the door was free for a simple push to give them entrance, they both though it appropriate to use the keys they were given for their first entrance. The locks worked sufficiently and Ludwig pushed the door for him, instantly greeted by a cloud of dust, falling specks of rocks, the only light being the one that came from the door, illuminating only but greyed floors, rotten wood and walls, and various holes that let quite the cold air drift. Pieces of the ceiling lay on the floor, rats, cockroaches and spiders scurried, and Feliciano was just about ready to let himself cry.

“Ludwig…it’s much worse than they said,” he honestly told.

Ludwig sighed, agreeing, taking off the heavy jacket he wore to instead give it to Feliciano, making sure to cover him well. He tightened the beanie on his head, fitting the large jacket well on his shoulders, then buttoned the area where the large bump in his stomach lay.

“Stay here, I’ll check the rest of the house."

“No, I want to see it too. We need to see it together.” He already moved forward, taking his arm decided.

“Feliciano, all kinds of sickness and diseases are in the air. I can’t risk you and I can’t risk the baby either,” he was determined.

Feliciano raised his hand to cover his mouth area from the dust, dirt and contaminated air. “I’ll stay like this, and don’t worry, as long as I’m by your side, I know I am well and that you will protect me,” he promised.

Ludwig groaned but ended up accepting, making sure that Feliciano’s hold of him was tight, assuring, for no such escape even if something were to suddenly happen.

They started the inspection, checking the functionality of every still standing door, of the broken windows, of old mural paintings that Feliciano would be determined to fix. The floors creaked much worst as they took their steps. Some halls were inaccessible with all the debris and old furniture that piled. The stairs were so unsafe, with many holes and even worst piles of impending entrance that Ludwig and Feliciano feared to go up to the second floor or down below to the basement.

As they were checking the old kitchen, Feliciano gave a simple little cough.

“We’re leaving,” Ludwig decided.

“But-”

“We saw enough. Come on, let’s go.” He took a more protective hold of Feliciano, trying to cover his entire body well on him until they finally exited, closing the door behind them.

They moved the car only but a mere distance, for Ludwig’s Swiss cousin’s house, which lay in the very near vicinity. His young cousin Lili was the one who instantly came out to greet them, offering them both kind embraces and welcomes, helping them with the small luggage of things until they were brought to the basement, which would be their stay in the meanwhile.

The four of them shared a dinner of soup, baked fish and a simple summer salad, just perfect enough for Ludwig and Feliciano after everything.

“How soon are you planning to start on it?” Vash asked.

“Tomorrow. I’ll start by cleaning it up, getting rid of all those old piles of junk,” Ludwig already planned on his head.

“But…aren’t you already going to start working on Vash’s mechanic shop as well?” Lili wondered with worry.

“I will. I’ll just wake up early and work what I can before leaving, then come back and continue until it gets too late.” He didn’t seem to mind at all despite the deep hurt Feliciano felt, knowing that he would exhaust himself so much for him and for the coming baby.

“Take it easy, Ludwig. Why don’t you instead work on it on the weekends?” Vash suggested.

“We have no problem with letting you both stay here however long until it’s good enough for you two to move in,” Lili added.

“I rather not. I want to have it done as quickly as possible. I don’t want my son or daughter to come into this world homeless,” he said while taking his bites of salad and fish harshly in determination.

“Ludwig…” Feliciano reached a hand to lay on his arm dearly. “I’m only four months in, the baby won’t be coming until January. We have enough time. I don’t want you to overwork yourself. We’ll manage what we can peacefully, and even if we don’t have the house ready yet, the baby will have us, and a lot of love, and that should matter the most, right?”

Ludwig still remained pensive, but he did take a dear hold of Feliciano’s hand, rubbing it gently, with promise and wishes, eyes landing on the bump of his stomach, reminding him of everything he still desired for the little thing that was growing inside.

“I still want to give it everything,” he said, the heavy promise obvious in his attentive eyes, to nothing but the bump and Feliciano’s face.

“It will have it, Ludwig, there’s no doubt, but don’t hurt yourself in the process. I rather this baby have you and me than anything else." He raised his hand to rub at the side of his face, quite an intimate and meaningful moment for them, which actually left Vash and Lili feeling rather awkward.

“Do you know its gender yet?” Lili wondered, quite excited about the coming little cousin she’ll have and wanting to change any gloomy air in the table.

“We were going to ask if you knew any doctors. I should be getting my first sonogram soon and that’s when we’ll surely know,” Feliciano smiled, excitement reigning once again.

“I really do not mind what it will be, I’m just worried about his bump, it’s too big for someone whose only been pregnant for four months,” Ludwig told.

“Mrs. Natale, she has a lab in the village. The number one person to go to about this. I’ll give her a call and assure you an appointment as soon as possible,” Vash promised.

They continued on other topics, until all plates were empty and they could withdraw to their sleeping preparations.

As soon as Feliciano had his shower, he sat down on the floor, a sketchbook on what was supposed to be his bed, drawing along while Ludwig was finishing his own book, with every turn taking a glance to try and have a peek at what his mate was doing. The only time Feliciano broke from his concentration was to stare at the clock in the bedside table, showing that it was about to be midnight.

“Caro, you should be going to sleep,” he told him.

“Not until you do as well,” Ludwig told him back, but obeying and closing his book, leaving it right at the bedside table as Feliciano did with his sketchbook. Ludwig made space for him and Feliciano took his spot beside him, letting their arms wrap around each other, dwelling in their softness and warmth.

“What were you drawing?” Ludwig asked, curious after he hadn’t managed to catch a single glimpse.

Feliciano had no problem with picking the sketchbook and showing him, both gazing to Feliciano’s plans for the house, how he was thinking of making the gardens, the entrance, the façade, the rooms, the halls, the living room, the kitchen, the terrace, all to every last detail and intricacy, a wonder that Ludwig could agree would be the dream they both wanted for this house. The last drawings were the plans for the baby’s room, still unfinished, but what took Ludwig’s interest was the giant stuffed dog doll in the corner. He raised his eye at that and Feliciano couldn’t help but laugh.

“Will that really be necessary?”

“Of course! Our baby could play with it and make it feel protected. I’m sure this child would love dogs as much as you do,” he grinned, nuzzling his nose with his.

“Well, if we can find a place that sells big stuffed dog dolls, sure, and also…if we have the money,” and Ludwig gloomed, saddening and worrying as every time he thought about the economic problems they faced, sighing and hoping he could forget about them in the trace of his fingers on Feliciano’s stomach.

“We will do what we can, please don’t worry, Luddy. If we can’t get it, it’s all right. Small little ones would be enough, I don’t mind. Like I always say, what matters the most is being together,” Feliciano said, taking the side of Ludwig’s face to rub, easing him close for a meet of their lips, the last soothing touch to bring them into their sleep and dream.

Feliciano convinced Ludwig to stay resting in the morning, only to be awakened once he had to leave with Vash to start working at the shop. Once they were gone, around the slope of the hill in their car, Feliciano and Lili picked some bags they quickly prepared after breakfast and headed down on foot to the old browned house. Once they were inside, Lili cleared whatever old planks, curtains, broken glass or piles from small openings, letting in more natural light into the old home, much easier to see and work with. She made sure that both her and Feliciano were covered as Ludwig would have wanted if he was there, with tied cloths on their mouths and heads, gloves, old hoodies, old pants, boots, and she jokingly put a pillow around Feliciano’s bump. They started clearing the main entrance, everything either moved to a single pile in a corner or outside in another one. They moved, they dusted, all through the day, until finally Feliciano could actually spot the stone of the floor clear. It was only a small space, but it was relieving, it was a sign of progress.

Time was lost to them as they worked, the late evening approaching them without notice, until sudden steps joined, neither Feliciano’s nor Lili’s.

“What are you doing here?” Ludwig instantly scolded, rushing off to take a hold of Feliciano, dusting away any dirt, taking watch of every part of him, relieved to find absolutely nothing stuck to his skin or signs of sickness since he prepared himself well.

“Lili and I thought it was best we started while you and Vash were away,” he smiled, still content and proud over the little they had done.

Ludwig gazed to Lili, who was dusting away the last of a corner they had decided they would reach for today, smiling and waving to Ludwig as a greeting before she continued with throwing all that dirt through a window. Ludwig couldn’t really complain or get angry, for as his eyes settled on what they worked. It was actually plentiful, the whole entryway clean, sure still a lot of things to be worked upon, but at least most of the old junk and piles were not there anymore, a nice clearing to work peacefully and be more focused on.

“Feliciano, you did an amazing job, but next time,” he reached and took the broom he held, “just wait until I arrive, I don’t want to risk you getting hurt or sick.”

Feliciano couldn’t help his groan, “just because I’m pregnant does not mean I’m incapable, Ludwig. I really want to have this house ready as much as you do, so I want to work on it when I can. It’s our home and I want both of us to work on it together. Don’t feel so worried, I covered myself, I’m with Lili and this street is completely safe. Please let me come here more often without you, I really want to offer what I can.” Even if his gloves, even if all the dust that lay on him and his heavy wear, he still leaned to embrace Ludwig, and he had no hesitation to wrap his own arms around him, only sighing as he let his hands play at his hair, still gazing to what they did, an excellent job for something that was just him and Lili.

Ludwig was weak to all this love.

“Promise me you’ll always come with Lili, do not try to move any of the heavy things that can be straining for you and never take any of the stairs until I fix them, all right?”

“Sì, amore,” Feliciano agreed, smiling unto Ludwig’s chest, relishing in his warmth and comfort.

Extra steps joined, those of Vash as he entered, gazing to what his sister and Feliciano did, an impressed smile as he nodded approvingly to everything.

“Excellent, need any other hands?” They continued until it got too late, with not even their flashlights enough to light up the continuing cleaning they did.

By the time they returned back to Vash’s house, they did well on trying to clean out one of the old living rooms and halls, all piles gathered at the front, Vash having called a truck to pick it up the next morning. They had a nice and welcoming dinner where Feliciano asked Ludwig and Vash about their day, Ludwig suggesting to Feliciano and Lili what they could do while they were away the next day and about that doctor they needed to contact for an appointment.

During the week that passed, a friend of Vash offered to get rid of every ugly bush, tree and tall grass that covered the house. It was all done in an easy day, more for the expecting couple to look, for more light to shine upon it and for more order as they continued to clean, by that moment having finished clearing most of the first floor, covering windows and doors with plastic wraps, installing some large electronic lanterns to help them work in the night, even a foldable table where they kept things like tools, bags, extra brooms, mops and formulas, as well as for whoever was working to have their breaks for food or just rest.

Ludwig and Feliciano decided to halt everything for that Monday since Mrs. Natale, their new Obstetrician, gave them an appointment for Feliciano’s first sonogram. Vash gave that day free to Ludwig without hesitation, understanding well what it meant, and so both headed to the village that morning, excited and nervous.

“Ciao, è un piacere incontrare un altro italiano," she greeted with cheek kisses that Feliciano had no problem with sharing in as they entered her office, Ludwig right behind, offering his own greet with a nod and a shake of her hand. “Vash told me you both moved in about a week ago. You chose a perfect place for your child. It’s a very German-Italian area, both the languages and cultures will be there for them to witness and grow with, although I’m sure you two will plan trips to your countries from time to time.”

Instant gloom set on their faces at that last mentioning, Feliciano stuttering and gazing to Ludwig for hints, wondering what they could tell her. Luckily, sensing how they felt about it, she started the questions quick, the three helping to fill in before it was safe enough to get Feliciano to lay at the chair to start. His shirt was raised, the gel was placed, the machine started and already she had the device circling, studying the screen for what was slowly appearing.

“Any guesses for what it will be,” she said wanting to keep conversation between them.

“We haven’t really sat to talk about it."

“We really won’t mind anything, we just wish for the baby to be healthy."

“But we do want to know if it will be an alpha, omega or beta, to make the necessary arrangements to the room.”

“Ah yes, I heard you two bought the old Wagner manor on an incredible deal. How are you going to deal with the reparation? I’m sorry to remind but the house has been in a horrible state for decades. That kind of fix will take a lot of time and money. I really wish you two luck,” she really did hope, dealing with the screen as the image became much clearer.

“Slowly, one thing at a time.”

“It’s true, we don’t think the house will be fully prepared for when the baby arrives, but we will do what we can so it can be the house they can come into as soon as we leave the hospital that day,” Ludwig expected.

“Right now we’re on a brink with this baby coming, we can’t pay for anything big, but just accept help and do what we can ourselvea."

“So I assume this is the only baby you’ll want for a while.”

“Yes, just for now, I mean, I’d love to have a big family, give this one a little sibling in the future, but we rather wait until we can have enough money and more prepared rooms to take care of a second one,” Feliciano smiled expectantly, already envisioning, one Ludwig couldn’t help but fall dearly to, with such a gentility and smile that betrayed his tall and intimidating demeanor. Mrs. Natale couldn’t help but smile herself, finding them both so sweet.

With one last checking, she came to a conclusion that she was eager to give to the happily expectant parents. There it was and she elated…but after she thought about what they just said, all sweetness left, her smile soured, clear hesitation that Ludwig and Feliciano noticed, of course worrying, Ludwig taking Feliciano’s hand ready to hear whatever it was she would say.

“Signora…is everything all right?” Feliciano wondered, sitting, wanting to be strong for her coming words.

“Um…yes, everything is just …well…from what I can see, you’re going to have healthy alpha boys,” she declared, afraid of the kind of reaction they will get, but still trying to remain as cheerful, to lessen the heaviness.

“Oh, healthy alpha boys,” Feliciano sighed with great relief, but still maintaining his hold in Ludwig’s hand, who felt the same coming calm.

“Hear that, Luddy, we’re going to have alpha boys, just like you. Alpha boys…alpha boys…alpha boys…wait…” the realization hit them.

“Eh…congratulations,” and she turned the screen, to make it obvious that there was in fact two growing little figures in Feliciano’s stomach, which explained the rather large bump he held for just four months. “You’re having twins…”

Ludwig and Feliciano felt all kinds of emotions at that moment, proud to know what their baby would be, of course, healthy, amazing, but two…two babies, identical twins at that, when they were at ruins, an old decaying house they just started fixing, Ludwig with a single job that was not even enough to pay for one baby and now they had to suddenly deal with the fact that they were having two at the same time.

Mrs. Natale calmed them, gave them books, medicines, ways to relax, even offering numbers for people that were bound to donate anything they might need for now two babies. Still, they left the lab with gloomed expressions, the only ounce of joy but a little picture of the sonogram that showed the black and white grained images of the two growing figures. Feliciano maintained his gaze only on it, planning what he could do with it, anything to not look at Ludwig’s expression as they drove back to continue working on the house. Even without seeing him he could sense his trouble, the harshened grip he had on the wheel, a stressed expression, singular on the curved roads they drove.

He thought about putting the picture on the fridge in Vash’s house, maybe on a little frame at the working table in their own house, or he could just keep it in his sketchbook until they actually had a nice wall they could frame it on. He sighed, they didn’t even have a real place to put something as simple as a sonogram picture.

They arrived before the house, so suddenly to Feliciano, who was too dedicated to the picture, to then raise his gaze to the rather horrible house, seeming more ugly now, more taunting, even after they cleared it of everything green covering it at the front, after the internal cleaning, after they placed some lanterns to give it life while they worked in the night or when it got too dark during the day.

Ludwig just got down, not even waiting for Feliciano or offering to open his door, he just went straight into the house, his gaze as frontal as from the moment he was told that he would father twins. Feliciano took a couple of easing breaths before he decided to head out himself, with easy gentle steps, enough for Ludwig not to notice as he gazed to the plans of the house they set on the table, one they had found when cleaning one of the old libraries. It had all rooms marked, which gave more of an assurance and form to how it was once, a help to repair. Ludwig pointed and marked, before he settled on an idea, raising his gaze, pensive and wondering, before he finally laid his eyes on Feliciano, who was shy to come any closer, for dread still seemed to hover above them heavily.

“There’s a series of rooms in this hall,” he pointed above them, “right in the center is the second largest room of the house. A door is right across what will be ours. We have to immediately start work on the stairs, cleaning, fixing the floor and ceiling. Once that is done, we’ll instantly set to work on that room for them.”

Feliciano nodded and so Ludwig closed the plans and sat on a chair, letting out heavy breaths, trying to relax, his head resting on the lean his arm took of the table, drained, tired, with now an extra heavy weight to worry about that didn’t let his mind or even body settle.

Feliciano let him dwell on it before he uttered: “I’m sorry…”

Ludwig raised and turned his gaze to him, wondering what that apology was for.

“I…didn’t expect them to be twins."

“You can’t control that, Feliciano, it just happens."

“Still, having twins runs well in my family, I should have…thought about that, and maybe if I knew…then…” he couldn’t continue, the whimpering didn’t let him, the tears trickled down easily and no matter how hard he gripped his hands on his jeans, it didn’t stop his watering and trembling.

“You would have what?” Ludwig stood, coming close, the scene a breaking that took him a lot of strength to not break the same, extending his hands to caress his face, looking into his eyes as a way to calm him enough to speak.

“Then I wouldn’t have left us do this, I wouldn’t have left myself burden you,” he breathed enough, letting his own tears fall upon his fingers as Ludwig continued to dry them, as Feliciano moved his glance away, too saddened with heavy fault.

“You were, are not, and never will be a burden to me, even if I knew what we did would have produced twins, I still would have done it. I rather have this…falling and tumbling house, broke and with nothing but a couple of bags of things we managed to bring then have the life we used to live before. I would choose you ten times over it.” He pulled his face enough to lay kisses on his cheeks, on his lips, enough of an assurance, enough of an intent.

“I’m happy were going to have alpha boys, that they’re healthy and that we’ll have a big family, it’s just…” he took a deep sigh, hands now falling to rub on his stomach, with the same stress, the same lingering and even fear that he’s worn ever since the news was told.

“I was already scared we wouldn’t have for one…and now that we’re having two…I’m worried…I want them both to be well, to be brought into a secure house where they’ll have everything, entirely everything that I can offer to them and you, but all I have is this house that-” that very moment a piece of the ceiling broke and fell apart unto the clean pavement they had cleared in one of the living rooms. It was so common they were pretty much unfazed by now. “…does that, a job that doesn’t pay enough, barely for one baby, no degree, no qualifications, nothing to really bring what I want into this family. It’s concerning, distressing and I fear that you and our boys will just see me as a disappointment.” He lowered once again, his graying returning, so downed that he couldn’t even continue his words.

No, neither could stand to see each other like this, so even with Feliciano’s own still falling tears, he leaned to place his own hands on the side of his face, in the same caresses, softness and sureness that Ludwig just gave him.

“You were, are not, and will never be a disappointment,” he repeated, with a shining smile, glee in his eyes despite the still falling tears. “I know right now everything looks bad, but we can fix it, there’s a chance for us to change it. We have so many people kindly helping us. We have Vash and Lili, all their friends and Mrs. Natale gave us a lot of numbers and locations to receive donations, we can use those. At least we have a house, not matter its ruin. I-I-I’ll start painting! Yes, I can sell some canvases, have a room with an amazing view just to paint. I learned some sewing from Lovino, Lili has a lot of fabric, I can make the babies’ clothing, I can make many other things to sell as well."

“…I could…try to make their beds and… most of our furniture,” Ludwig slowly began to elate with the prospect, already thinking of all kinds of projects, for Feliciano, for his coming children.

“You can?”

“My cousin Berwald taught me a thing or two. There’s a lot of wood in this area and Vash can help me get anything else. I’m pretty confident in what I’ll be able to do."

“Oh, they’ll be more than enough, they’ll mean more than whatever expensive thing we can get in a store!” Feliciano jumped into his embrace, both now smiling, swaying and laughing, bringing this space more love, more of them, with true elation for the coming twins, confident to give them everything even with the little they could manage. It made this old cringing house lighter, beautiful and more their home.

< Video 1.2 Video 2.2 >

#Good Luck Friedrich #gerita #gerita fanfiction #gerita fanfic #gerita fic #omegaverse #omegaverse gerita #gerita omegaverse

18 notes · View notes

hawaiiathletics · 8 years

Link

2/20/17

Having publicly contemplated retirement in the past, University of Hawaii women’s volleyball head coach made it official Monday.

After 42 seasons at Manoa, Dave Shoji is retiring.

Shoji concludes his legendary coaching career with 1,202 wins — second-most in NCAA Division I history — and four national championships.

“It’s been a hard week, because obviously, after 42 years, there’s a lot of emotions when you step away from something like this, something we love, we cherish. It’s been a tough week, but like I said, we’re in a good place. We feel really good about the decision,” Shoji said at the press conference, accompanied by his wife, Mary. “I thought this was the right time. We’d been talking about retirment, and with the pool of applicants that David (Matlin, UH athletics director) was sharing with me, I felt really good that we’d have a good coach in place, so it all kind of came together in the last few days. I understand the timing is a little strange, but I think everything is good now. I think the timing is perfect.

“It was very difficult, because I love the sport. I love the game. I love my job,” Shoji continued, “God was just pulling me toward retirement. It was difficult, but I just kept getting pulled toward retirement. There was something telling me to do that. It’s been probably since December that you think about it everyday, so day by day, it evolved into let’s do this.”

Back in December, Shoji revealed he was battling prostate cancer and had to take some time away from the program to undergo treatment.

As for his health at this point, Shoji said Monday, “I feel fine. Yeah, I have no problems right now, just going through some treatment, but I feel great. I’ve got great doctors and God willing, I’ll be fine.”

“When he actually made his final decision, I think I felt a sense of relief, because I know it’s been pulling at his heart for quite some time,” Mary Shoji said. “When the whole health issues came about, I think perspectives change in a hurry. I think it really makes you step back and take a look at life in the big picture and what’s really important. I think for Dave, it allowed him to do that, because I think he’s been so focused on his job and, at the same time, that tug of being pulled away, I just think it really brought it into focus. I think I felt relieved. I think, as this day has gone on, it’s become very emotional for sure, but that’s to be expected when you’ve invested your life as many years — both of us have, especially him — it’s very difficult for sure, but we’ve got good things in store for us, so I’m counting on that.”

“I don’t think anyone will ever match what Dave has accomplished for our Rainbow Wahine volleyball program in terms of longevity and accomplishments,” Matlin said. “He has dedicated more than half of his life to the program and has touched the lives of hundreds of student-athletes. His legacy will live on through his well-deserved induction into the AVCA Hall of Fame and through all the blood, sweat and tears his teams have battled through on the court at Klum Gym and the Teraflex at the Stan Sheriff Center. Rainbow Wahine Volleyball will always raise a glass to Dave Shoji.”

Ah Mow-Santos to take over as head coach

The university also announced Shoji’s replacement: former assistant coach and Wahine star Robyn Ah Mow-Santos.

Ah Mow-Santos is only the third head coach in program history. She is considered one of the most decorated players in school history, with an impressive resume that includes three Olympic Games appearances, two first-team All-America selections, and is a member of the school’s Sports Circle of Honor and Hawaii Sports Hall of Fame.

During the press conference, Shoji admitted while he supports the choice, he had nothing to do with the decision.

“I was not surprised. It’s just a natural selection. I think it makes a lot of sense. I think David did a lot of due diligence and sought Robyn out. I think it’s a great selection and great choice. He would inform me of people he was talking to. I had no input as to the decision, the final decision,” Shoji said. “The one thing I think that separates her from anybody else is the passion for the game. If you saw her coaching on the sidelines, you know she just loves the game, loves to be involved, loves the players. She’s played for so long. It’s just truly the only thing she looked forward to during the day, beside her family. She just loved being in the gym, loved being with the team. I think the word passion just comes to my mind first of all. It absolutely makes me feel at ease. Obviously, we wanted someone with the right ingredients, and she fits the bill every way you look at it.”

Shoji adds though he may be retiring, he “will be here for her, if she wants me to be involved. I’m here. I’m not moving. I intend to be at all the games. Whatever she needs me, I’ll be there for her.

“I have no regrets,” Shoji added. “We’ve done what we could’ve done. I think looking back, we’ve been successful. The program is at a point where I think Robyn will continue to have it grow. It’s right up there, top 20 every year. I think she’ll continue with the success. I’m very satisfied. I wish we could have won two or three more. Charlie (Wade, former Wahine assistant coach and current Rainbow Warriors volleyball head coach)’s in the back over there. We were in the final game a few times. We could have had one or two or three more, but that’s the way sports are. You don’t always win as many as you want to, but looking back, I think it’s been a great run.”

“We are excited about the return of Robyn Ah Mow-Santos to the University of Hawaii Rainbow Wahine Volleyball program,” Matlin said. “There is no other person I can think of who represents the sport of volleyball, the spirit of Hawaii, and the heart of a champion more than Robyn. She was impressive as a student-athlete, a leader of Team USA in three Olympic Games and is an incredible role model for all young athletes. I know she will be able to get the best out of her student-athletes both in the classroom and on the court.”

Matlin forwarded his recommendation of Ah Mow-Santos to UH Manoa interim chancellor David Lassner, who approved the selection Sunday.

“I am excited and humbled at the same time,” Ah Mow-Santos said. “Replacing Dave Shoji is impossible. I will never forget what he has done for me personally as well as the Hawaii volleyball program. Dave walked me out of the McKinley High School gym and into the Rainbow Wahine program that created a lot of opportunities for me. It’s a privilege for me to be able to give back to the University and the game that has given me so much. I look forward to reuniting with the student-athletes and hope that I can help create lasting impressions and unforgettable experiences for them.”

From 2011-15, Ah Mow-Santos served as assistant coach under Shoji, mentoring former UH setter Mita Uiato, who earned three all-league and all-region honors and honorable mention All-America status. In 2014, she was on the coaching staff of U.S. Junior National Team for the NORCECA Women’s U-20 Continental Championship. She currently coaches club volleyball for the Vegas Aces.

Following her playing career at UH, Ah Mow-Santos went on to compete for the U.S. Women’s National Volleyball Team from 1999 to 2008 and was regarded as one of the top international setters in the world. She was the team’s starting setter in the 2000 and ’04 Olympic Games and in 2008, she helped guide Team USA to a silver-medal finish at the Beijing Olympics. She also played professionally in Italy, Portugal and Switzerland. While playing for Volero Zurich in Switzerland, she earned the Swiss League’s most valuable player award.

At UH, Ah Mow-Santos played for Shoji from 1993-96 and was a two-time AVCA first-team All-America selection (1995 and ’96), and a three-time all-conference performer (1994, ’95 in Big West and 1996 in WAC). The Honolulu native ranks third in the UH record book in career assists (4,313) and fourth in assists per game (11.23), and in her final two seasons at Hawai’i, she guided the team to a 66-4 combined record which included an appearance in the NCAA title match in 1996.

At the conclusion of her playing career, Ah Mow-Santos was a student assistant for two seasons as she continued to pursue her bachelor’s degree.

Ah Mow-Santos prepped at McKinley High School in Honolulu where she was a four-year first-team all-Oahu Interscholastic Association East selection and a three-time first team all-state pick. She is married to Niobel Rafael Santos and they have three children.

The exact start date for Ah Mow-Santos has not been determined. “She needs some time to honor previous commitments she has made before she can jump on a plane,” Matlin said.

#dave shoji #robyn ah mow-santos #hawaii #volleyball #wahine volleyball #rainbow wahine

2 notes · View notes

usuallyleftnight · 4 years

Link

On Tuesday, Melissa Zarda was dealing with two things at home in Kansas City, Missouri: the loud barking and mischief of her new foster puppy Winnie, a cattle dog/pitbull mix, while—above the din—relishing the hard-fought, historic victory she had just won in the Supreme Court in the memory of her beloved, deceased brother Donald.His was one of three cases featuring LGBTQ people fired for their sexual orientation or gender identity that SCOTUS yesterday ruled, 6-3, were illegal under the sex discrimination provisions of Title VII of the 1964 Civil Rights Act. The ruling—embracing the cases of gay men Zarda and Gerald Bostock and trans woman Aimee Stephens—has been hailed as one of the most significant in recent years, setting the protection of LGBTQ people from workplace discrimination in legal precedent.The Supreme Court’s Historic LGBTQ Ruling Is Now a Valuable Legal Weapon Against BigotryMelissa took on the case after Donald died in a base jumping accident in Switzerland in October 2014.“Don would be extremely happy and overjoyed by the decision,” Melissa told The Daily Beast. “I can see his face right now, I can see it so well, it’s like he is almost here. His face is absolutely beaming, and he had a smile bigger than any room anyway. He could light up a room. It’s been an amazing journey. I’m so glad he stood up. I’m so glad that Gerald stood up. I’m so glad that Aimee stood up. I’m just so pleased we’re here, talking about this right now.”“On a grander scale this case wasn’t just about Don,” Melissa said. “Don knew that too. I know this will impact millions of people for the good. To have Don’s memory and legacy on the right side of history like that is incredible.”Leading up to the publication of Monday’s decision, “I was nervous and scared,” Melissa said. “When you get used to all this bad news, you think, ‘OK, another one is coming,’ Maybe, when the decision was announced, it made me that much happier because I couldn’t quite believe it.” Her husband, Matt Cathlina, had been more optimistic, reminding Melissa of how positive she had left the Supreme Court the day the case was heard last October. “Our team did so good, they were so skilled,” Melissa said. “I knew we definitely had a chance.”“I woke up knowing it could be that Monday, but didn’t have any idea. I was refreshing the Supreme Court website over and over and not seeing anything. I was getting nervous.” Melissa went for a walk, came back, refreshed it more, and the site crashed, “meaning something big had probably happened.”Melissa wrote to the ACLU legal team, who wrote back that she, Don, the LGBTQ campaigners, had won.“I was overjoyed, my heart was racing, pounding,” Melissa said. “I think I was smiling and crying at the same time. I was doing 10 things at once: texting, crying, smiling, and laughing—it was like a shot of adrenalin. What’s happening with the country is so tragic and awful, we needed this shot of good news desperately right now.”She shared the news with Bill Moore, Don’s surviving partner, who teamed up with Melissa in leading the case, with legal backing from the ACLU alongside lawyer Greg Antollino and Pam Karlan of the Stanford Law School Supreme Court Litigation Clinic. Melissa also messaged her and Don’s mother Shirley, sister Kim, Matt, and their extended group of family and supporters. “It’s amazing, there are no words for how happy we are with this decision,” Melissa, a graphic designer, said. “So many LGBTQ friends and family members are so relieved that they will be safe from discrimination in the workplace, especially now when the economy isn’t well and unemployment is so high.”Shirley, Melissa and Don’s mom, didn’t understand “what a huge scale this was” until she saw the many articles about the case and TV news segments. “She is beyond excited,” said Melissa. “She is telling everyone she can. She is a proud mom. She was always an advocate for Don. This was so important to her. It has also brought up a lot of memories and emotion for her. She still struggles with Don’s death and his not being here.”“We have this euphoric happiness, but also a bittersweet sadness that he is not here to enjoy it with us. It’s hard, but also good news at a time when we need good news.”When it came to the ruling, Melissa was “pleased it was 6-3 and not closer. I was pleased that Gorsuch wrote the decision, and that he understood. I disagreed with Alito, saying this was legislating. For me, it couldn’t be clearer that this was the right interpretation of Title VII. It seemed as plain as day.”* * *As The Daily Beast previously reported, Donald Zarda was fired in 2010 from his job as a skydiver with Long Island company Altitude Express after coming out to a customer. The trial court found that Title VII did not cover sexual orientation. The U.S. Court of Appeals for the 2nd Circuit reversed that holding, claiming that sexual orientation discrimination was a subset of sex discrimination. Like the funeral firm that employed Aimee Stephens, Altitude Express took the case to the Supreme Court—and lost. An “incredibly smart” young boy, Donald was always intrigued by airplanes and air travel, Melissa told The Daily Beast last year. Both his mother and father had pilot licenses. As an adult he spent a lot of time skydiving with friends and others who shared his passion. Melissa is scared of heights, and “a huge regret” was that she never jumped with her brother. He was warm, generous, and loving as a brother, and loved sharing his professional passion with others.Donald’s family was immediately supportive after he came out. “It was almost not an event,” said Melissa. He did so in his mid-20s. “I don’t think he was delaying telling us for any other reason than he was busy traveling the world and skydiving. He was not around that much.”He went back to school to get a degree in aviation-related management and administration. “Anything that involved being in the air was all he cared about.”His death had been devastating. “Even years later the emotion tied up with it is still that intense,” Melissa said last year. “He kept our family together. We’re still tight, but he was such a force. It has been a devastating loss, unbelievably hard.”Donald felt strongly that he was a victim of homophobia. “He absolutely was a fighter,” Melissa said. “He could not stand anything unfair. He felt he had been discriminated against, and was immediately prepared to fight. He knew it was wrong, and he was going after it. He wanted to stand up, in case it happened to anyone else.”“Don was devastated when he was fired,” Melissa told The Daily Beast after the SCOTUS decision. “His job and career and skydiving meant the world to him. He was afraid of what would happen after has fired. It was hard to get work elsewhere, and he worried he would be looked at as a troublemaker.”“He was confused and upset. He would call us, and we would console him and do our best to be there for him and support him. I would say this weighed very heavily on him in the last years of his life. Skydiving had been everything to him, and then this case became everything to him.”* * *In the wake of their Supreme Court victory, Melissa does not know yet if the family will pursue the case directly with Altitude Express. “We’ve barely had a chance to get any sleep. It’s good to bask in this victory and how wonderful it is, but if we wanted to focus our energy on what comes next there is so much work that needs to be done in getting the Equality Act passed. It’s sitting in Congress, when people are still being discriminated against in housing, education, health care, and credit. There is still a lot of work to do.”Donald would not have expected the case to go this far, Melissa said. “He would have been very surprised, but happy everything turned out the way it did.”Melissa said she was “ashamed” that before her brother’s experience she was “totally ignorant of the scale of discrimination out there. I couldn’t relate. When Don first called about what had had happened, I said, ‘Well, that’s illegal, duh.’ I had no idea. I said, ‘We know that’s illegal. You need to do something about that.’”Like many people, Melissa thought that surely anti-LGBTQ discrimination was already outlawed. The Supreme Court case highlighted how far the law has fallen behind social and cultural evolution. The stories sent to her by LGBTQ people who had been fired for their sexual orientation and gender identity “opened” Melissa’s eyes further, she said. “I am so grateful for that,” Melissa said. “I can’t pretend to know what they have been through. But I want to listen and be there for them and do what I can to help them. The case has definitely made me see outside of my bubble a little bit. It’s been a good perspective shift, and really heartwarming to get support from so many strangers.”Melissa noted that the vast majority of Americans believe that LGBTQ people should be protected from discrimination, as revealed in a CBS News poll, “so the Supreme Court decision was a long time coming and overdue.”Melissa plans to work on helping make the Equality Act law, as well as volunteering for other causes such as Black Lives Matter and animal rescue.“Too many people out there suffer discrimination,” Melissa said. “This is America, 2020. Nobody should be discriminated against.”Read more at The Daily Beast.Get our top stories in your inbox every day. Sign up now!Daily Beast Membership: Beast Inside goes deeper on the stories that matter to you. Learn more.

from Yahoo News - Latest News & Headlines https://ift.tt/3d7AVwO

#Blogger

0 notes