#but when your episodes run 80-100 minutes long you are effectively making me watch a full-length film anyway

[konstantya]

Sometimes I really miss the structure of network television.  Like, yes, I understand it’s cool shows don’t have to cut episodes down to a strict 45 minutes anymore, but at the same time, sometimes having rules/guidelines you have to adhere to can be a good thing?

[theliterarywolf]

So, Let’s Talk ‘Love Death and Robots’ (Episodes 1-9)

Netflix's newest foray into the world of adult-oriented animation Love Death and Robots is one more nail in the coffin of the notion that any adult cartoon has to suck off the teat of Family Guy or South Park.

The spiritual successor to the 80s sci-fi animation anthology Heavy Metal (in more ways than one, since LDaR was originally supposed to be a Heavy Metal reboot but lack of funding and copyright hell got in the way), Love Death and Robots gives us 18 different short stories brought to the screen in the medium of animation that range in all emotions from shock, horror, disgust, sympathy, hope, and, yes, even sadness.

Just like I did with Season 4 of Black Mirror, I am going to give my personal thoughts on each segment for those who want to know what they're getting into. However, since each of the stories in Love Death and Robots only range between 8 and 17 minutes, I will not go into spoilers.

Also, to do things a bit differently, I will also add in the ratings of 'Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?', to reveal if the sci-fi elements in a story were prominent or if it was more fantasy-oriented, and 'Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?' to reveal, well, just that.

Tl:Dr – I personally found Love Death and Robots to be a very-much welcome breath of fresh air to both the fields of adult animation and anthology shows. I forget what medium/site posted it but there's the sentiment of Love Death and Robots being what Black Mirror has been striving to be for its past two seasons.

And, yes, that comment is pretty damn appropriate. Love Death and Robots elegantly combines the darkness and unease of the technological unknown of the scientific condition with looks at the human condition as well as snarky dark humor. If you can stand blood, gore, and the occasional female-presenting nipple, you should definitely give it a watch.

And now, for the actual thoughts on each story individually. Remember, no spoilers.

Episode 1 - Sonnie's Edge

Be still, my Teratophile heart. Love Death and Robots' first entry hits the ground running, slashing, and biting with a strong female character and the dismal underground world that she’s successfully made her bitch. The first half of this short grabs you and doesn't let go until the second half starts and, admittedly, slows things down. Breathtaking for sure, Sonnie's Edge isn't my personal favorite of the anthology, but I can definitely see where a good chunk of the money went for LDaR.

… I also see this story getting the same treatment by tumblr that this website did to the San Junipiero episode of Black Mirror.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Bio-Mechanical Engineering of minor-kaiju type monsters. Also, the mental link software used for fighters to connect with said creations.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes to a TV series of Sonnie's Edge. Unlike some of the other stories in LDaR, the nuances and universe set up by the brief glance we got would work wonders if worked into a 12 episode show.

Episode 2 – Three Robots

In the biggest full-frontal flip of tone, Three Robots yanks us out of the grimy Cyberpunk future of Episode 1, to a comedic look at a post-apocalyptic one with our titular three robots taking a sight-seeing tour through a long-decimated city. Discussions are had about human nature from a neutral, but still comical, outside point of view and that's all I will say because, going any further will bring in spoilers.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Three of them, in fact, each representing a different aspect of robotics: one sleek and cold-looking, one humanoid with a neutral face, and the human-friendly models.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Honestly... No. The story, as well as its ending serve their purpose best at the length and scope it has in its run-time.

Episode 3 – The Witness

'Yeah, but –'

No.

'If you just –'

No.

'It really is one of the best on--'

NAH, G, THIS AIN'T IT!

There needs to be a phrase: 'Cool Universe; Shit Story, Brah' to slap onto pieces of media that have a great aesthetic and a great universe on display... But just an awful story.

Because The Witness fits that phrase to a tee. If anything, the only aspect that The Witness has going for it is the stark color scheme against the dismal urban landscape and the sex.

Lots. And. Lots of boob-shots and bush-shots in this one, folks.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Did it? I don't even know what kind of technology was displayed in this episode. Apartment-based leather sex-clubs?

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

This would probably have been much better if it had an hour or so to build up the characters and the twist rather than flashing everything at a breakneck pace and forcing us to sit through a drag of a story.

Episode 4 – Suits 

(No gif for this one; tumblr, you guys are slacking)

Best. In. Fucking. Show.

This one is definitely one of my top two favorites for the entire series. Everything is there: character, universe, writing, it's all great. Especially since, considering that it follows the 'Last Stand' trope and it would have been extremely easy for the writers to go 100% grim and miserable.

No, that... * sigh * that comes later.

You like farmers? You like mechas? You like farmers in mechas fighting aliens? You will now!

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Yes, several of them!

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

If we ever got to a point where Pixar made films for adult audiences, a feature-length look at the universe of Suits would be the vein they would need to hit.

Just maybe with a less noticeable frame-rate 'style'.

I'd also like to add this: a lot of people these days seem to have the issue with sci-fi and fantasy-oriented media because they feel as though they only cater to kids/teens (either the characters will be 'young adults fighting “teh systemzz” or high school bullshit). That and the worlds depicted don't draw anyone in due to how... unrelatable they are.

The fact that the characters in Suits are your typical hard-working, middle-aged farmers just trying to live their lives... while still having to fight carnivorous aliens in mecha-suits re-purposed from farming equipment really makes the short seem that much more human.

Episode 5 – Sucker of Souls

(No gif, again...)

Oh boy! The Castlevania Cinematic Universe looks great!

Seriously, this was the first moment during my viewing of LDaR were I was left wondering 'I thought... this was a sci-fi anthology..?'

That being said, though, I'm always a sucker for unique hand-drawn animation and the abrasiveness of the characters flow nicely together. Even though you can pretty much tell, at the five minute mark, that things may not end up too well, it's a fun ride in the same vein as the Brendan Fraser Mummy films.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Well, you see, the thing is, I – No.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

It probably could be a good Adult Swim animated series (in the same vein as The Venture Bros). But, other than that, it stands fine on its own.

Episode 6 – When the Yogurt Took Over

(Gif not from the show but still appropriate)

This... Seems to be the dividing point for a lot of people in regards to LDaR. You have a lot of people saying 'Oh, this one was dumb; it didn't make sense' or 'the animation was too cute to be so gruesome'.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. However, a lot of the people complaining that it was dumb or didn't make sense probably didn't grow up with the same dark comedy/gallows humor that many of us did/have sought out. Things like Little Shop of Horrors, Dr. Strangelove, Sayonara Zetsubou-sensei, Dead Like Me, Metalocalypse, Black Dynamite (the animated series), and others that I can't find right now because Google keeps trying to recommend me to Family Guy of all things when I type in my searches.

The story here is short, poignant, and pretty close to home despite the title giving you what you're getting on the tin.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Not really a robot... But the scientists in the story were working with genetic engineering. So, there you go.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

Mm... No. This is another 'watch it as is and get the best effect' story.

One more thing, though: The Narrator of this story is none other than Maurice LaMarche.

Mother-fucking BRAIN from Pinky and the Brain!

Episode 7 – Beyond the Aquila Rift

It is... so hard to do Cosmic Horror correctly in recent times. The notion of creating tales that show just how small we are in the grand-scheme of the sleeping nightmare behemoths who keep the universe running in the space between their frantic thoughts... Is overwhelming to a lot of people. So a lot of first-time attempts at it ultimately fail.

This story, Beyond the Aquila Rift, is one of my favorite entries to LDaR. Right up there with Suits.

And I will leave it at that.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Space-travel, hibernation gel/tubes, space-stations.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

And even that is a hard maybe because while you could build up the characters and their relationships a bit more, the resolution of this story works fine either way.

Episode 8 – Good Hunting

Is... Issat – Is that GOOD Steampunk in front of me? Oh Lord, it's been years! More hand-drawn animation for this one but the way it melds not only technology, magic, imperialism, and friendship but still incorporates the message that technology and progress can be used for great good and great evil... It depends on the morality of those wielding/pushing for it... Is really a high point in both writing and execution.

The animation, especially whenever the technological aspect comes in, really shines.

… You know, in hindsight, that last line could be seen in bad taste.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

The whole set-up is British Imperialist forces bringing Steampunk and subjugation to China. So, yeah, a lot of copper and a lot of steam in here.

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

I know I've been shoving everything into 'could shine as a film on its own' category, but Good Hunting really is the type of story I would love to see expanded out and directed by someone like the late Satoshi Kon (Paranoia Agent, Paprika, Millennium Actress).

Episode 9 – The Dump

(Honestly, I’m not even sad that I can’t find a gif for this one)

This one... Ah... This one.

I ... Hm.

Y-you want to see old, dangly redneck penis? Y-you see old, dangly redneck penis for a good few seconds in this one.

But, yeah, this one is definitely... a story. Your typical 'stuffy white-guy pencil-pusher comes to scare old, grungy countryman off of his land/old, grungy countryman decides to tell stuffy white-guy pencil-pusher the story of why he's on said land...

And to go any further would be spoilers.

It's not bad, it's just... Interesting.

Did it Have a Robot – Yes? Or No?

Well, it depends. Do you see pollution as more an aspect of sci-fi or an aspect of socioeconomic discussion?

Could this Stand Its Own as a Feature Film/TV Series?

I don't think anyone would want to see more of this story in either form, truth be told. It exists fine on its own.

And that's Part 1 of my little write-up on Love Death and Robots. This got a little long so I'll be posting Part 2 tomorrow and linking it HERE when I do! Seriously, if you can you should definitely watch the series and support some good adult animation so Netflix will push for more stuff like LDaR, Bojack Horseman, Aggretsuko, and The Kirlian Frequency... And less stuff like that damn 'Brickleberry But They're COOOPS This Time~!!'

[corellianangel]

Fan Review: Solo: A Star Wars Story

May contain minor/some spoilers after the cut.

I suspect that Solo: A Star Wars Story might be a bit like its title character. A bit rough at the start, maybe shady, pretty good-looking, and definitely out to get your money. But, as it goes on, it becomes more and more apparent how good and truly nostalgic and lovable it is.

This is a film that “nobody wanted.” Which means...what? I wanted it. When I saw Star Wars ANH, I wanted to know all about that cool Solo guy. And finally, 41 years later, I got my wish. And yeah… I’m mostly happy. After Last Jedi, I was pretty much done with the franchise, so it’s not like I went in with high hopes.

Solo is a relatively low stakes reprieve from the “we must save the world/galaxy/universe” all-or-nothing epic trope that has plagued us for the last few years. This is an adventure, a coming of age, and a western heist. Stakes are high, but only for the characters you are relating with onscreen, making it a curious addition to this year’s blockbusters.

Make no mistake; This is a love-letter to original trilogy Star Wars fans. It’s Han Solo in an Indiana Jones style adventure ( and what could be more fun than that).

4 out of 5 stars.

The first minute of Solo is exactly how a movie about the titular character should begin. But then it immediately lags, then even more so under ill-paced exposition. As soon Han goes solo though, it gains momentum. Then a short few minutes later as Woody Harrelson appears, things get rolling outright.

Alden Ehrenreich takes a bit of time to slide into Han’s scuffed boots, both onscreen and in our fan hearts. But when he does, it works wonderfully. He’s not the sexy gruff cynic Harrison Ford portrayed. No, he’s a “Kid,” who's got dreams. He’s a romantic. He’s wide-eyed, immature, and even petulant at times. But like Harrison’s portrayal, he’s arrogant, talented, goofy, jealous, easily embarrassed and will gladly spin a terrible lie. And oh yes… he can turn it on. Not at first, no… that’s really awkward ( more on that with Emilia). He’s not Harrison Ford by a long shot, but when given the chance later in the film, he makes a scene his own, and it’s HOT.

Unfortunately though, Alden is easily five inches shorter than 6’ 1” Harrison. And it’s glaringly obvious (especially to me, as I am quite a tall person). Sadly, Alden’s 1” platform 2”+ heel boots can only add so much. Otherwise, I’m satisfied with his portrayal. Alden’s a great actor, he had huge boots to fill, and I think he’s really been treated unfairly by the fans. Give the kid a chance, he might win you over.

Donald Glover IS Lando Calrissian though.  He’s sexy, sauve and even a bit silly ( in all the right ways… make no mistake).  I daresay Mr.Glover has taken Billy Dee William’s place in my heart as the epitome of Lando. Whether he’s coming on to Han, or Qi’ra or some unspecified alien species, he’s a pansexual on the level of Oberyn Martell from Game of Thrones. An arrogant playboy badass, who loves all the finest things. He is willing to enjoy everything life has to offer, and why not? It’s hard not to love him as a result. Lando movie, anyone?

Tobias Beckett is everything Han wants to be. Beckett is also in love with fellow crook Val, and his attachment to her is cemented firmly in a couple of scenes, which unlike the Han/Qi’ra scenes–have great chemistry. And Woody Harrelson’s portrayal of yet another grizzled mentor is stunning. I found him much more appealing than Harrelson’s equivalent character from Hunger Games. Though the mantel is starting to wear. Don’t get me wrong. I adore Woody Harrelson. His being in this film gave me a reason to think I might just like it. I’m just not sure I want to see him as yet another badass mentor after this.

When Thandie Newton appeared in Beloved back in 1998, I was an instant fan. I’d seen her before in a few other flicks, but she blew that one out of the water as the title character. Since then she had worked steadily in a number of critically acclaimed roles. I was absolutely thrilled to see her in this as Val. And utterly heartbroken that she was totally underused. When Val is onscreen, she overshadows everyone else, even Beckett. It’s a shame we don’t see more of her than we do. Boo!

Emilia Clarke as Qi’ra…Hmm.  She’s cute, charming, and tries her hand at swordplay here. But honestly, the Queen of Dragons is a poor fit. The original casting call was for anything other than yet another white brunette. And with amazing ladies like Tessa Thompson in the running, why oh why did we end up with Emilia? If not racism (God, I hope not); Ang’s answer: Think $$$, from Game of Thrones fans in theatre seats. I can think of no other reason. Her chemistry with Alden is tepid at best ( and any of that comes much, much later). I feel bad for Emilia here. I think she was miscast, and that tarnish will always stay with the fans. ( P.s. : the three adult heterosexual males I watched the movie with, were over-the-moon smitten with her. To each his own. I guess…)

On to the non-humans...

Joonas Suotamo as Chewbacca is physically brilliant. He’s stolen my heart as Chewie from the lovely Peter Mayhew (sorry Pete) over the last three movies. But honestly, we discover nothing new about Chewbacca in this. Zero. It’s rather unfortunate. I wish I could say more. But we learn more about Chewie in episode three than this. A missed opportunity. Sorry Chewie. For some reason Disney put your character in the doghouse here.

L3-37 is another definite weak spot in Solo. We have a snarky female droid (yay!) as a droid-rights advocate (cool!).  But it’s so completely overwrought. Only Lando’s constant eye rolls save this character from being as ridiculous as Jar Jar Binks. Which is another shame, because I felt she fills in the current canon equivalent of Lando’s copilot droid Vuffi Raa, from the EU/Legends novels from waaay back in the 1980’s, (interestingly they are both pilots, are both self-aware droids and have vaguely parallel fates) Some editing issues arise as far as L3′s character is concerned too. She’ll be leaning, casually watching,  while droids are being slaughtered in front of her, but only interferes with other robots later in the same scene? Why?? Were the first dead droids not good enough for her to save? It’s inconsistent, poor editing; and that really hurts the character. Sorry Phoebe Waller-Bridge, you did great job with what you had. I’m not sure that the script/editing was as good as you deserved.

The spaceship the Millennium Falcon is 100% a full character in this too. Without giving too much away, she represents her pilots as they sit at the helm. She’s treated with more respect - reverence even -  in this, than any other film. And I can say this is her movie as much as it is Han’s. Millennium Falcon fans, you are in for a treat!

And the bad guys...or one guy anyways....

Paul Bettany is chilling and utterly convincing as the gangster Dryden Vos. He also has much better chemistry with Qi’ra than Han.  I’m fairly certain this is mainly due to Paul’s astonishing acting ability.  He first came to my attention as the title character in the darkly funny UK crime film Gangster No.1. I was floored by him then and he’s still blowing me away, even as the rather challenging character Vision in the MCU. Bettany does not disappoint in Solo either. He took over this role with zero preparation, with the weight of replacing another respected actor at the last minute in an extremely troubled production. And the optics of having a white European actor taking over from an African-american are...ermm...not the best. He pulls it off, though. But I can’t help but wonder what Michael K Williams would have brought to the role. Vos is a soulless psychopath under Bettany, not unlike his character in Gangster No.1.  Would Williams have brought the tragic–almost romantic deep spirit and inner strength he brought to his gangster Chalky White in Boardwalk Empire to Vos instead? It’s rather sad we will never know.

I don’t think I can say much else about the other antagonist(s) without spoiling a bunch. But let’s just say...wow! Well done! Surprises and fan service all around!

There is something missing here too. We never see Han as an imperial pilot. Nor the promised Shakespeare-inspired comedic comic book characters that Ron Howard teased last fall.  These gems may be reserved for DVD releases, but I feel Han’s missing academy stint is definitely a gap in this story. And the movie lacks because of it.

Importantly, I do recommend seeing this in IMAX 2D as it is a very dark and muted film.

The usual amazing, special effects, costumes and sets we’ve come to expect from the Star Wars film franchise are all present here.  The styling is different from the previous films, as it takes place about halfway between Episode Three and Rogue One.  It’s neat to see the evolution of the Empire’s gear. 

And the easter eggs are everywhere; prequels, Rebels, Clone Wars, Star Tours ( the Disney Park ride), the comic books from the 1970′s and 80′s, the EU/Legends Han Solo novels by Brian Daley, the Lando Calrissian novels from the same era are especially referenced numerous times. Even the Indiana Jones franchise gets a significantly placed nod.

To say the least, the fan-service is strong with this one.

But not the Force. Not at all. None of that simple tricks and nonsense here at all.

Because I’m a pretty hard-core fan, I pre-bought two showings on initial release. The first time I saw Solo, I was unsure if I actually liked it, but it seemed to be a decent film.  The second viewing ( the same night) was an absolute joy. Times three and four were with different groups of adults, and they all had a blast. Five was with a group of 13 year old girls, and they all enjoyed it too.

So let’s call my rating of Solo then, 4 out of 5 stars. 

Honestly I don’t get the backlash against it.  Don’t take your Last Jedi hate out on this. It’s a fun ride with decent jokes and no space-boob-milk monsters—honest!

And if you think Solo offers nothing different, new, or imaginative. You are 99% correct...Remember, we got that full package of “different and innovative” in Last Jedi. If that’s your schtick, watch that one instead then.

Oh, and one more thing- that 1%?... two words:

Shower scene.

[peanutdracolich]

Peanut Dracolich Watches Horror: IT (1990)

So yeah I know this isn't the sexy new film, and that as a 3 hour miniseries created to be watched in 2 sittings (I intend to watch it in 1 day but with an intermission) it will be odd to judge. Still I'm not watching it for the story. I'm watching it for the Tim Curry.

And Tim Curry does not disappoint. Neither does Jonathan Brandis as the young Bill. As a TV miniseries It was of course a different viewing experience than a movie. Mostly in ways that hurt it as I suspect it was because it was made to be watched with commercials that they defaulted to silence and didn’t try and use music to hold and create tension except sporadically and during the journeys into the underworld. Oh and the film really makes me think of the Hero’s Journey.

So first things first: Was the film good? The answer is kind of.

Part 1 I would say was roughly at the level of the Omen, and slightly below as Horror. Still it had strong performances from Tim Curry and Jonathan Brandis (actually all the children put forth a pretty good showing), good pacing, a good ending, and is mostly held back by an unsatisfying score, and just not quite being able to clench the deal and bring all the elements together. As a story it was better than the Omen, it just couldn’t get everything to quite fit together.

Part 2 is noticeably worse than Part 1. The adult actors give significantly less gripping performances. The pacing is worse. It introduces things that make me go ‘what are Pennywise’s limits?’, and ‘What are deadlights?’ with no resolution. There’s less Tim Curry. It’s a much weaker half. I think I’d have actively sort of hated it if I had really tried to watch it 100% attention for both halves back to back (past 2 hours for horror they tend to grate on me I’ve noticed). That said it did give conclusions to things, but the heroic narrative despite actually giving a more complete resolution to the Hero’s Journey is weaker. It’s the weaker half.

Overall the film was ok, but not great. Functional horror but failed to give the grade A creep, or real scares. If you like Tim Curry it’s worth the watch, he makes a good villain, but if you don’t you’re a monster! No not really, but you probably won’t enjoy it much.

So the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly:

The Good:

Tim Curry as Pennywise: Tim Curry is good at creepy. While I am glad he wasn’t the animated Joker (Hamill’s job was perfect), Curry is good at the villain, and Pennywise is legitimately creepy and many times I felt I should have been scared... I just sort of wasn’t.

The Kids: The Losers Club as children are pretty good. They’re characters that I care about, and enjoy seeing. Bill gets some real feelings, and they seem rather in the role.

The Journey: I am not the greatest King fan. That said I now want to read the book, because the basic story was good and interesting. This is not a ‘it makes me feel like I need to read the book to get the story’, but that it did in fact have a legitimately interesting story beyond the monster and horror elements.

The Bad:

The Score: I noticed an hour in that things weren’t working right and realized that I couldn’t say anything about the music except that it had had no emotional effect. They then entered the sewer and started using generic horror music. Which was an improvement. But when bad music is an improvement there’s an issue. In the 2nd part while actively looking for and trying to note the music I could still not find any useful emotional effect and a disappointing tendency to default to silence in a way that didn’t make silence creepy. I’m suspicious this is a side effect of made for TV and commercial breaks being liable to ruin it. But really I’m not sure.

The Adult Losers: Partially it was thematic and narrative, them becoming actual losers despite being successful, which made them come off as less likeable, but in general the adult actors just didn’t sell their roles. The kids felt earnest and heartfelt, like they were really playing it. The adults just felt sort of like they were phoning it in a bit. It’s disappointing.

The Ugly:

I Feel like I Need to Read the Book: What are Deadlights? Is there something to the Deadlights, or could they have just mentioned the light and not given it the fancy name and made it actually a little scarier? While normally I’d put this as a bad (I am still sore about Universal’s Mummy on this). For the most part I don’t feel it’s really necessary, and if I hadn’t already looked up a bit about the book (space turtle) I might not feel this way. Still not the best quality.

The Spider: My first thought was it looked like a butt with legs and two human arms dangling from the cheeks. The next glance made it look better but it was still an ugly thing. And true to King adaptation tradition the final effects for it sort of made me want to laugh.

The Play by Play:

The start is... good for TV horror. I'd say it's not super impressive for 80s movie horror, but it's basically functional. Girl sees clown. Girl disappears. There was an X-Files episode like this.

 6 children, though. This is part of a string of them. And the black police library knows something. Elements of this are familiar. You get the feel that he's dealt with this before; that this is a return to what has happened before.

 We see Stephen King... I mean Bill the horror writer for a time before the Library calls him and now we get a flashback to a group of kids swearing that "if it isn't dead, we'll all come back"

 I think we're getting an hour and a half long flashback now.

 Georgie (Bill's younger brother) is being sent into the basement to get some sealing wax for a paper boat. And he's scared of the basement but not killed there. He's going outside, though, watching the boat run down through the storm water. Bill obviously cares for the kid even if he considers him a brat.

 Still Georgie meets the Clown looking up at him from a storm drain. He introduces himself as Pennywise the Dancing Clown. Convinces Georgie to reach in and then... NEEDLE CLOWN TEETH

 We have a funeral now. Bill is either hallucinating or being fucked with by an evil reality warping clown.

 Oh we're out of flashback. Bill let himself forget everything, he blocked it out, and now he knows he has to go home and do what must be done. Also his childhood stutter is back. He's horrified, and he doesn't want his wife to come, and yet he won't really tell her what's going on (because he's sound like a crazy freak).

 We get our next member of the group. A dude who got some award of some sort for... Either heavy drinking or architecture he seems to do both. I'm going to call him Beard face till he has a name (so far we have Mike and Bill). He used to be fat. Why is he telling a woman this while making out with her? She doesn't care or want to know. Ben gets the Call (to Adventure) from Mike. He cannot refuse the call, though like Bill he tries. 18 minutes in and I want to get a flowchart of the hero's journey. Well ok, his refusal lasts like 10 seconds. He then decides he isn't drunk enough. He needs to get double falling down drunk. And maybe kill himself. Killing himself could be good too. Dude off the roof. No not off that way. You shouldn't be on the roof.

 Flashback time. Ben, or as the asshole calls him 'fat boy', is a transfer student who immediately makes a new 'friend', a greaser punk who wants to pick on him, and decides that getting detention for it means that he should actively threaten the fat boy.

 Asshole's greaser friends almost chicken out when it looks like he's going to actually cut him. Ben kicks him, falls over the fence and down the hill and runs to hide in a storm pipe. They harass Bill and Asthma Kid instead causing him to have an asthma attack with an empty inhaler.

 Ben and Asthma Lad bond over dead dads while Bill fetches the new inhaler. We learn Georgie got an arm ripped off, and Asthma Lad is named Eddie.

 Ben and his cousin have... an adversarial relationship. Ben has met his dead father. Who wants him to go in the storm pipe again. And is offering balloons. He is now a clown. Now a skeleton reaching for him and covered in algae.

 We return to the present and Ben drops his bottle begging please no.

 We see the girl who Child Ben liked, Beverly, but she's now a designer and I am thinking about Designing Women. She is meeting with Japanese investors and does not get the call because her partner (and lover) doesn't let the secretary give it to her.

 She gets it that night. RL Interrupts. It's made for TV, I consider this the equivalent of a commercial break. Her boyfriend slaps her. 'You've forgotten your manners' 'It's been too long since last time' He's threatening to beat her with a belt so that she'll be stuck in the house for 2 weeks and heavily implying this is not the first time. She knocks him down with a bottle to the forehead. They're over now.

 She's also taking the call better than the rest. Best friends she's ever had. We get the mandatory flash back, and Ben is giving her a love letter. Her dad finds it and decides that receiving love poetry from a boy, that deserves a beatin', he needs to beat the slut out of her.

 We have two new people show up. And then the 6 kids start building a dam. Beverly likes Bill and believes Bill sent the poem. Ben learns this. Ben is sad child.

 Beverly is attacked by a blood filled balloon from her sink. Her dad can't see the blood. She lies about seeing a big fat spider. So he won't beat her. "You'll die if you try to fight us. You'll die if you try. You'll die if you try." Good and creepy.

 Half an hour in and we've got decent build up for the amount of character and story they're introducing. I mean it's very made for TV but it's pretty good. We don't see Eddie get the call, but he's rushing back to Vermont. His flashback will be soon.

 So right now Mike has called 4 kids, we have a 6 kid group, and this does not include Mike. We still only have a half introduction to 3 of the 7 characters. Eddie accidentally spills popcorn on the greasers, the joke kid Richie decides to mock them and pour his soda on them since they're assholes and they're gonna try and beat them up anyway so fuck it have some fun at their expense.

 Eddie's mom is overly protective and clingy. "You don't need no friends except your mom." She's still like this with his adult (and apparently successfully running a business) self.

 Pennywise is creepy clown again. The scene's effects are... functional with a touch of imagination, though elements of it could take you out. Still Pennywise is creepy.

 Richie is a successful TV comedian. With pretty bad jokes. Like just sort of unfunny build up to a so so joke. It's his child hood dream, though. I bet that didn't include puking in terror in a toilet. But that is Pennywise's fault.

 A cop scolds them a little about the dam, but really he's just trying to warn them 'there's been another child murder near hear, don't come here alone and don't split up while here.' Reasonable authority figure!

 Richie is attacked by a bad movie werewolf which becomes Pennywise. Pennywise is far scarier. I blame Tim Curry.

 We finally get Mike's flashback. I think Stan (the unnamed 6 member of the group) died. The greasers decide to fuck with him because he's black. Our group is just the people the greasers fuck with aren't they?

 Still they're swapping Pennywise stories; only Stan - the science lad - doesn't have one. That is when Mike begins to approach, and they can hear Henry's gang (increased to 5). Bill, being the leader, suggests everyone arm themselves with rocks to threaten them with.

 It's an impromptu rock fight and the Losers have the high ground, but when a rock hits Beverly, Ben shows that fuck this he will beat their sorry greaser asses.

 Still Henry has named the group: The Losers Club.

 We also learn the evil clown has been here for hundreds of years, and is able to animate pictures. And threaten to kill them from within.

 Pennywise claims to be all their fears. Stan, can't take it, he knows he saw it, like everyone else but it's impossible. I see him as dying.

 I am touched and moved by Bill's moment. The kid (actor) is good.

 And back in the present Pennywise is fucking with Mike.

 And now we get Stan's? Stan is ready to try and make a baby. Stan won't be making a baby right now. Stan will be going back home. We have 20 minutes left in part 1 and Stan... Stan isn't sure he'll come back. Still we know they all lived through the summer.

 Flashback: They are practicing their slingshot murder skills. Beverly demonstrates hers and they accredit it to fate. DIVINE AID. They then move to the threshold, preparing to enter the sewer systems and the Underworld. Really I'd say more that they've crossed the threshold, that the group gathering has been Bill's finding friends and allies, and that he's moving into the very abyss. Still this film has my mind in the Hero's Journey.

 They all take a hit of Eddie's inhalers (it's battery acid will eat through anything), and Henry watches from the bushes. He intends to drown them all to death.

 They are literally entering a dark hole in the ground to fight a monster. This is pretty direct hero's journey stuff.

 Oh Henry isn't planning to drown them just catch them and beat them horribly. 3 on 7. He intends to pincer them, but I wouldn't want to be alone in those tunnels right now.

 Meanwhile Bill leads his band of Losers through the tunnels in hunt of the great white clown.

 One of the greasers die and I realize the greatest problem of the film. It's just not enough. It never reaches the proper clench of terror, just missing it. You could blame the special effects, but 2nd rate special effects don't bother me that much, I'm actually going to say it's the music. As I noticed the lack of musical use in that scene. I mean they start using it now, but I am realizing they haven't been using it well before now and music is a huge part of horror.

 Still Henry and his other greaser friend grab Stan and no one notices for a while. As Henry threatens to literally murder him, Pennywise comes and kills the other greaser apparently as a bug monster that shines with unholy white light and pulls people into tubes. Whatever it is he turns Henry's hair white just by passing by and Stan doesn't look.

 The film is finally using music. It's not top rate, but it's better. Still doesn't quite reach fear (improper prep). Pennywise, in the form of a light surfboard passes over them and fog begins to fill the tunnels to separate them. It's a very 'why Lovecraftian films fail' moment; it feels like a bad attempt at the incomprehensible.

 It begins to play on their fears one by one. Bill's failure to protect his brother. Beverly's father. Richie's werewolf (he beats it alone). Stan's... Stan just gets grabbed by the clown.

 "I am eternal child. I am the eater of worlds and of children. And you are next!" Not if Eddie has battery acid and Beverly has a silver stone. They fight It off, and Pennywise tries to flee. Bill has his monster claw... He gets away, and makes sounds.

 Bill wants to go after it and make sure it's dead, but the rest say it's dead. Their dam never broke to flood things. Bill makes them swear to return. Stan, the Weak Link, doesn't actually swear until all the others have, skipping his turn.

 We return to the present with Stan's wife coming up to see him and... He's killed himself in the bath with a razor, writing in his blood IT.

 I'm going to take a break before part 2 but part 1 was good, though I feel it didn't have the best music and more than its TV grade effects that hurt it.

 For the Hero's Journey, Bill has had the Call (his brother's death), he didn't really refuse it but that's optional, and there's not so much a mentor. Still it moves into the threshold of the unknown the gathering of allies, the tests of his courage in the form of Henry's gang, and then the descent and ordeal of the Underworld. Beverly is the one who takes up the weapon and strikes IT, but Bill is the guiding hand of it all, he is the one who seizes the sword. They return to the surface and thus the ordinary world and he is resurrected with absolution for Georgie's death. He has made the Hero's Journey and I really do feel that King was thinking about Campbell when writing this at least from watching the film.

 Part 2 begins with Bill's visit to his little brother's grave, and Pennywise mocking them with 7 graves, one already full. Bill tells himself he's not afraid of Pennywise, but he does not really convince himself.

 There seems to be some rather active memory manipulation going on since Bill is starting to remember more and more and seems to sense when people arrive. They have been linked.

 I stop typing to eat some sardines. Still we get people attempting to relive their childhood immediately after a scene of Pennywise telling the jokester that they're too old. Pennywise interrupts. We also have Beverly returning to her childhood home to meet with her father and finding a sweet old lady who becomes her zombie dad and then Pennywise. I still feel that Bev's boyfriend was something about daddy issues born of abuse.

 Oh and Bill's wife is being hit on by her boss, who is also threatening her career. That's nice. He's a nice... horrible sleezebag and she is going back to the US anyway because... Ultimately I think he oversleezed.

 They meet at a Chinese restaurant, but Beverly faints. Bill you're a married man you shouldn't kiss her like that. Eddie breaks down when he finally remembers Pennywise.

 Bill is not telling about his wife. We also learn what happened to Henry. He went crazy and confessed to being the killer. He's still in the asylum. It is talking to him; Pennywise is goading him to murder the Losers.

 Richie wants to drop out and run. However when their fortune cookies attack, he is rather convinced to consider staying.

 They learn what Bill already suspected. Stan is dead. We get talk about what Stan saw and experienced and introduce the concept of Deadlights. What are deadlights?

 Stan's head shows up to mock them. He mocks Billy's stutter, Richie's cowardice, Ben's regaining of weight, Bev's tendency towards abusive men, Mike's getting them there, and I think he implies Eddie is gay and hiding it.

 Pennywise is pushing Henry towards Murderin' Time cause Pennywise can handle them if they only half believe, but not if they fully believe. He needs an agent. He can however kill the guy at the door. What are Pennywise's rules?

 Well ok, he apparently functions on a 30 year cycle. Also their home town is sick of spirit and has people who will watch 3 guys sexually assault and prepare to rape a young girl (no younger than them but still). Still there seems to be the hand of fate and a dark curse at work with the Losers and the town respectively. I blame the space turtle.

 Bill's wife is coming, and she encounters Pennywise. Good scene... oh god he has hypno eyes filled with deadlights. What are deadlights?

 They split the party while in the hotel. Never split the party. Never be in a hotel in a Stephen King story. Never combine the two into one!

 Pennywise impersonates Bev to make out with Ben (I'm betting it's Pennywise). Pennywise likes kissing dudes. Pennywise likes fucking with people. Oh and Mike is being murdered by Henry, but I'm going to focus on Pennywise's manipulation of people's sexual desires because eh the black guy died in a horror film. Actually this is notable in that the black guy died first (Stan didn't make it to the meet up so doesn't count). It's a famous trope (that I've rarely seen actually done except in reference to the trope) in horror, so I make note of it.

 Bev finally realizes that Ben wrote the love poem... the day after Pennywise fucks with him with the idea. Still make outs time.

 Part 2 feels slow. Like more seems to have happened in Part 1, I check the time it's 1 hour in with 30 minutes left and it feels like... it's just been slow.

 More that the town is evil and in a way part of It. Richie sees a news report about child murder and has a moment. I find myself waiting for Bill's wife to come up again in some way.

 Everyone is prepared to flee, but Bill gives a speech about how he's hellishly tired of this stuff. This is mixed to a flashback of kid Bill asking for their help and I realize I think the kids were better actors than the adults.

 "Losers fight It, Losers die." Richie, that's not right. When you fought It, when you actually fought It, you won. It's only when you've been scared of fighting It, when you've whiffled and refused the call that you have died. It's not if fight then die it's if Losers don't fight It, then Losers die.

 They find Bill's wife's purse. They seem to have been aware he had a wife. Bill is charging off alone in terror for his wife's safety.

 We get an encounter with Pennywise and then Bill launches a boat to find him, leading to a den with skeletons outside. Eddie confesses his virginity, and his inability to love people. He felt this was important. Oh the skeleton covered ogre lair door is kid sized that's a nice touch. And there's actual audio cues and play now, have been since they entered the sewer. So I can sort of see why they'd go that way, but it's still not good over all.

 They find a spider's den, Bill's wife, and... A giant spider with an ass for a head and human arms? Oh no, now the head is a head. It's alright TV movie effects. Beverly launches her silver bullet but it cannot hurt the spider's armor and then It releases the Deadlights and catch Bill, Ben, and Richie.

 Eddie tries to repeat his battery acid attack, but it too fails. His belief is not pure. Beverly reclaims a silver bullet and fires it straight into the deadlights and the spider retreats wounded. Still Eddie has died. It then ends like many Stephen King adaptations in a burst of bad special effects which come across as almost comical with them pushing the spider over and killing it barehanded.

 We now get Mike's voice over telling what happened to the rest with the curse broken. Bill's wife has gone into a prolonged state of shock, and Bill tries to break her free with the magic of his childhood bike. It works.

 I could look at part 2 with the hero's journey in mind but... it wasn't good enough.

[somedaypast-thesunset]

I tell him in plain language I haven't eaten and have no money for food. He offers to loan me money and that I can come over. But it's -2 and all my cold weather wear is garbage from the 5 min I spent just going to the store. He says he has to charge his phone. I'm like OK but u can also do it on your laptop. "yeah but then I'd have to find my wallet". I gave a huge exaggerated laugh because who the fuck responds to someone asking to eat like 5hat? He thinks my reply is weird. I tell him I assume he's joking so I'm laughing otherwise I'm just depressed. He replies, "do you need money now?"

SO GCDFHJFFDXDJKCFYBVXSSJKCF

DO I NEED TO EAT TODAY? DO I? GYESS NOT BECAYSE I WOYLDNT WANT TO BORHER YOU TO FIND YOUR FUCKING WALLET.

the only mature non combative response I had was no response because I'm not even dignifying such a stupid fucking question with a response. Fuck you man. Just fuck you. I'd get more respect sucking dick for 40$. Quicker too.

And I'm trying soooooooo hard and it's just nothing. I'm doing nothing but expending the absolute most amount of effort I currently have before becoming sooo exhausted and frustrated that I'm becoming impulsively violent - much like traits I had very young that I worked to control. Like my day consists of waking up and being brought home. I smoke weed, find a podcast or video or movie to listen to but barely pay attention and try to bring myself to do anything. Like changing my clothes from yesterday. Going out to get food (which if I do is my entire morning and I'm done after). Lately I want soooo badly to get back into my shit. I used to be productive. Like I lost alllllllllllllllllllllllll drive for anything. I cannot fathom going to a job. My whole disposition says I want to die every moment I'm awake. I watched this doc about this crazy lady who starved to death in an abandoned house on an occupied street like ppl walked by the house she had neighbors but she like actively chose to just starve and die. And everyone's so confused like oh the neighbors were there she could've gotten food but no. I get this lady. I am this lady right now. I am in an abandoned house that is my body and my neighbors can see I'm here but they don't care if anyone is home. They wouldn't feed me.

In some ways I was like oh no. This lady is me. But she was delusional. Like she made ppl up. I haven't ever. But I am becoming like my mother more and more but I guess I empathize more. This lady was so depressed like she really wanted to die all the time and she was miserable and couldn't keep friends and I get it now. I got it before but now I really get it because there's no choice anymore. At some point you like... You're standing on the edge of the abyss and then u let go and from that point on its just free falling out of control. You can't stop it once it's hit full momentum. And I'm screaming cuz I did the drugs. And I can do them again so I can placebo effectvmyself for 2 weeks and crash again. I am existing solely for the purpose of a few other ppl right now. Like I can't die right here because my roommate has to find it and he's the last person I want to find dead me. Like if a stranger could spot a body that is me, that'd be good. Or like a dog finds me first. I want to go in a forest. I want my body to refuel the earth and I want animals to tear me apart like when the Indians let vultures eat their dead. I'm dead you know. People have too much control. I'm used to no control and I embrace the lack of control one has in death despite society trying sooo hard. And I'm still there you know cuz I want to control when I die. I wan5 to choose and death is not about choice. And it's hard to die. Killing yourself takes like extreme effort. I cannot selfishly take my cats with me tho I want to. I want to die with my cat in my arms, the only thing that ever really loved me besides my dad. I just want to go far far out where it's no coming back. Like even if I last minute didn't want to I want to be so far out in the woods I can5 make it back in such condition so I just die because wanting to live is the moment of weakness. This is not a moment. I am not in a decade long moment. I am suffering and I hurt and the "system" is a fools game. Like it took 100 yrs to accept certain medications and procedures as fucked up because it takes society 100 yrs to figure anything out and like I guess my hope is that because we're evolving technology so fast maybe in 5 years they will know how to fix depression. They will look in my brain and s3e the suffering and fix it. And I'll flick a switch and my memories will be neutral in feeling, not ptsd.

It's not even ptsd anymore. No, it's not JUST ptsd anymore. It's the starting long term effects of poverty. It's like.. My own mental issues maturing with me as I'm getting older and it's not easier at all?

Like I tried to do my shop and realized its so half assed and like I can't be this age and present this level of effort. I can do better I just chose not to but I spend effort doing it half assed still. I took apart 80% of my jewelry and have yet to go back to it because why. And that's sad. Like I have to be careful now to maintain what I do have or I may not care enough to do it again. I have alllllllllllllllllllllllll the time in the world to do something. Anything. Any. Thing. And I've listened to 350 episodes of last podcast, know deeply a 38 yr old man I never met who plays video games online, watched anything deemed good on Netflix, am totally up to date on s3veral news websites and podcasts and I smoke like 400$ worth of weed a month.

I don't even want to know me.

But like.. I don't pretend I just don't talk. I talk to others, share commentary occasionally but I just don't talk about anything. I especially don't talk about how depressed I am because it just bothers ppl and creates both positive and negative opinions none of which are helpful to the illness.

So im very very secluded. And I used to use isolated but that's negative. That's saying I'm forced into it. I'm forcing it. I'm not. I actively choose it now so I am secluded and extremely private.

I'm still trying though? Like I don't even know why. Today I signed up for usertesting sites because I already do contract tests for consumer reviews so maybe I'll make some money but at the same time I feel like its another dead end. Just go work at McDonald's.

Art wise, there is so much I could do to revamp my shop. All new, well made jewelry. I need all new photos including ones of my art with close ups and stuff. I want to "graduate" my art skills a bit. Like really make nice well cut paper with borders for matting and start to sign my work and like all of this means higher quality so a higher price. I can do fucking better. And honestly I'm not doing anything else right now. My mind is completely disabled and to consider working is laughable now. I know I'm not going to so I can stop being anxious about it. Fuck em. I've been doing a depression project for charity cuz that's what I did earlier this year too but this one is more personal. I have 3/5 of what I wanted for my goal but at the same time what I made is so.. Average. It's not great at all. It's just iok and does the job and I tried my best but maybe I didn't? The fact 3/5 have all turned out with fairly major issues makes me feel less inclined to continue and the whole thing pointless cuz why give something to the homeless that sucks. So u can feel good?

I don't want therapy or medication. I deeply hate society and most of humanity. I used to be OK with it and I wanted to be apart of it but I was so shit on by so many people that I can't do it anymore. It's not worth it. 30 years of shit for like 30 y3ars of average? Cool.

Still trying tho. Still asked for money for food and I'll go hungry today but I'll havevmoney tomorrow I guess. That's life. Me and the 45 ppl on main St homeless. Somedays you eat Somedays you don't. He will probably realize at some point he made a mistake - hopefully. Because if I have to chase him for it, I'm probably going to hang out by myself tomorrow too.

I'm now worried I have no good winter clothes and my boots have holes in them. I'm already in super debt. I have to get a new jacket and boots before it snows. I could've gotten an extra 10 if I braved the cold for 25 min tonight but I'm just so tired I don't care enough. I can't talk to anyone about this. Then I'm just poor and a burden cuz I have no job and spend money on weed. And I did. I put myself far into debt just for weed. I'm now working on this plan that since I've quit smoking I must be up some money so I'll slowly build funds back up by not smoking and not spending crazy. Which even now sounds bullshit. But I'm trying the testing thing as well. If I get my shop up before Xmas rush. These are reasons to try but I'm only trying because d3pression put me in debt. If I wasn't this sad I wouldn't spend this money. I wouldntvlive like this.

Honestly until I get this money I don't even have funds for the bus to get my birth control. At the same time tho I was willing to sit all of this out and wait but I have like 7 days to be paid and I can't go 7 days without eating at all.

I spent myblast 3$ on cat food and honestly just this run down alone describes how insane I am. Like there's no way it's OK for me to be on my own to this degree. No sound psychologist would say yes 100% clearly functioning on their own in need of no assistance. If someone described this to me in my moments of sound mind I would be like this bitch is dead in atleast 5 years. Prob less. Meds aren't enough. Therapy is not enough. And I don't deserve to be in a psych ward because my capacity for reasoning and logic is fully there and it's unfair to have success in q team monitored to be released into the same conditions you know.

What am I doing when my father's gone? This because no one recognized that in a Co dependent relationship there are two people who are d3oendent not just one and instead of really assessing the situation people chose to think I was lazy and living off my father (even tho I was not) ignoring severe depression and suicidal t3ndencies. Thanks.

I am the abandoned house.

Today I was trying to get ready to leave when he said he still wanted to smoke from my bong and ohh where do I have to go that's so important. And it's not just him. It's anyone who knows myclife. They d3cided my time has less value because someone who's not them d3cided to pay me money in exchange for menial tasks. Since I don't have that my time is meaningless and they can not show up to qppts or show up late or leave late or make me wait X amount of time cuz I have all the time in the world. They work u know. But I no longer care. For the people who know me I'm no longer accepting this and just going about my lif3 without them. For those who don't, I'm no longer going to share anything about my life with anyone. I'm just as valuable as you. My time is equally of worth. Fuck you for ever thinking different.

Just remember - anyone else alive, not your problem.