#clearfurygalaxy

[reyesstrand]

16 & 82 please! With TK being the one to say them to Carlos? :)

apologies for how long this took!! thank you for your prompt! 

feel free to send me a number from this list if you’d like. also available on ao3! 

((possible tw: brief mentions of minor/background character death)) 

TK has come to accept that it’s impossible for him and Carlos to completely stay in touch during their shifts.

They get pulled away so quickly and without warning, their full attention needed for whatever task that’s been thrown their way, that going several hours without getting a response from his boyfriend has become the norm. But it doesn’t help the sense of dread that just seems to build in his stomach when he’s left with nothing to do but pace around the house, looking for something to do that’ll keep his mind off the possibilities. Especially today, when the lack of even one brief message the whole time Carlos is at work leaves TK feeling restless and like something’s wrong.

“You know, it’s my day to do dishes, son,” his dad says from behind him, after he’s spent the last ten minutes elbow-deep in suds.

TK glances over as his dad leans against the counter next to him, looking at him expectantly. “Oh, uh, it’s not a big deal. I was bored.”

“Never thought I’d see the day,” Owen teases, but when he catches the furrow between his son’s eyebrows and the way he’s not really looking at him, he crosses his arms over his chest. “Alright, what’s going on? Is everything okay?”

“Yeah,” TK lies, trying not to wrap his dad up in his shit — it’s the start of their forty-eight hours off, the last thing his dad needs while dealing with chemo and paperwork is his own misplaced worry. Besides, Carlos is supposed to be done his shift in an hour; he can dwell in his own anxiety for that long until he’s sure he’ll get a text telling him everything’s okay.

His dad’s like a hawk, though, and he pointedly reaches over to turn off the tap. “TK, talk to me.”

“It’s probably stupid,” TK mutters, finally stepping back from the sink and reaching for a dish towel to dry his hands with. Owen cocks a brow at him, and TK sighs. “I just haven’t heard from Carlos at all today. And it feels...wrong. Even though I’m sure they’re just having a busy day.”

“First, it’s not stupid,” Owen says, and TK barely holds back the urge to roll his eyes. “And second, isn’t it possible he just hasn’t had the chance to text you?”

“Yeah, it is,” TK insists, scrubbing a hand down his face. “I just can’t get over this feeling in my stomach that something happened.”

“If it feels wrong, then there’s a good chance you’re right, kid,” Owen shrugs, and TK heaves another sigh. “I can see if this shift’s captain has heard anything.”

“No, it’s okay,” TK quickly interjects, deciding on his plan as he goes. “He’s supposed to be home soon, I think I’m just going to head over there and wait for him.”

Owen nods, squeezing TK’s shoulder, careful of how hard his grip is — almost two months after bursting his stitches, and he still gets awful aches and twinges of pain that limits his movement. Then he moves over to grab a mug from the cupboard. “Send him my best.”

“I will,” TK says, unable to help the small smile he tries to keep to himself because just knowing his dad likes Carlos — not even just as his boyfriend, but as a person that he actively tries to hang out with, which fucks with his head enough — makes him so much more hopeful. There've been so many relationships of his that just don’t pan out, and his dad’s immediate perception of the guys he would date would often be enough of a tell for him to know things were probably not going to go great. Shaking himself from his thoughts, he grabs his phone from where it’s charging and after frowning down at the still notification-less screen, he pockets it and grabs his house keys, yelling a goodbye to his father as he heads out the door.

He only has to wait on the curb for a few minutes as he waits for his Uber; he could drive his dad’s car in theory, but he doesn’t like leaving him without a means of transportation should there be some sort of emergency. It’s a nice enough night, anyway, the warmth manageable and broken up by a pleasantly cool breeze. TK makes it over to Carlos’ place twenty minutes before his shift would be set to end, so he lets himself into the house with the key that’s stashed under the doormat, moving with ease around the living room as he tries to get comfortable. TK fiddles around with his phone, texting a little in the groupchat that Marjan forced them all into, mainly smirking down at Judd’s very direct, very matter-of-fact responses.

He hears the doorknob turning, and he’s on his feet in seconds. TK had thought he would’ve gotten a reply from Carlos when he’d texted his boyfriend that he was at his place, but there was still nothing. Carlos steps inside and TK opens his mouth to make some snarky comment about his phone being on the fritz when he notices the heaviness with which Carlos is carrying himself, and the hollowness in his face, and the pain in his eyes.

“Carlos?” TK quickly strides closer to his boyfriend, worry twisting like a knife in his gut. “Hey, are you okay?”

“Hey, TK,” Carlos says, and his voice is off. TK furrows his brows and moves aside when Carlos kind of shoulders past him, heading toward his bedroom. He has yet to really look at him, and TK starts pacing around the living room, until Carlos emerges from his room, changed out of his uniform. Carlos finally looks at him, from the other side of the room, and jerks his head toward his back porch.

He doesn’t say anything, and TK just follows him as he heads for the backyard. It had been so endearing when Carlos had first showed him this space, complete with outdoor seating and an actual porch swing. It’s where TK finds Carlos, sitting with his arms crossed over his chest and focusing his attention on the ground.

TK takes the leap of faith, and risks bugging him when he’s clearly in a less-than-pleasant mood, and sits down next to his boyfriend.

It’s so obvious that Carlos is trying to put on a brave face when he looks over at TK, and that he’s seeking out the comfort of his presence because TK presses himself to his boyfriend’s side and curls an arm around his shoulders.

“You can talk to me, sweetheart,” TK whispers. “If you want to.”

“We lost a kid today,” Carlos says, quickly, his voice sounding shattered. “Well, I lost a kid, I was the one that couldn’t get her to the paramedics in time.”

“I’m so sorry,” TK murmurs, pulling Carlos closer to him. He knows exactly how that feels, losing a child on a call; it sort of carves out a hole in your heart and sits there, a pressure you can’t lift, for days, sometimes weeks, after it happens. TK licks his lips as he quietly adds: “It’s not your fault.”

"It is, though,” Carlos replies, before the dam breaks and his eyes start shining with tears.

TK immediately pushes closer and curls his other arm around Carlos, feeling his face press against the crook of his neck. As the shaking starts, TK presses his lips to the top of his boyfriend’s head. “It’s okay, it’s okay. I’ve got you.”

He feels tears against his skin, and TK tries to swallow down his own emotions welling up inside. He just clenches his jaw and secures his arms as tightly around Carlos as he can, making sure he can feel how much love he has for him, how he’ll never let him go.

“Just breathe, okay?” TK murmurs, bringing his hand up to cradle the back of his boyfriend’s neck, fingers scratching gently at his scalp. “I’ve got you, Carlos, I’m not going anywhere.”

After a few moments, he hears Carlos sniff and say, “sorry,” mostly into his skin.

TK shakes his head, and pulls his arms from around Carlos so he can frame his face in his hands again. “No, don’t apologize. It’s okay.”

He swipes his thumbs under Carlos’ eyes, and his boyfriend lets out a shaky breath.

“It’s just—I keep seeing it over and over in my head,” Carlos says, and TK nods, knowing all too well what that feels like. After another moment or two of silence, Carlos mutters: "Thank you, for..."

He doesn't finish, looking down at his hands, and TK just throws his arms around him in a proper hug.

"I'll always be here for you." TK whispers, as he feels Carlos' arms tighten around him. It feels like a bigger revelation, his heartbeat hammering away in his chest as he suddenly feels cracked open for Carlos to see. It's six words, but it feels like he's saying more than he should.

Carlos presses a kiss to his throat, before pulling back from the hug, hands still gripping at TK's shirt as some sort of anchor. He looks at him with fondness under the lingering pain, and TK swallows as he feels seen. Carlos doesn't comment on the words, or the levity behind them.

"Will you stay tonight?" is what he asks instead, voice quiet and, under the layers, hopeful. TK finds himself nodding before he's even done speaking.

"Of course," TK whispers, before they come together in another hug, both of them embraced by the comfort the other brings. "Always."