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10 Intellectually Twisted Jokes Only Smart Minds Will Understand

Wit with a Side of Smarts

They tell us that intelligence is like underwear: you need it, but it's better left unseen. We don't think so. There's no harm in flaunting your quick mind, particularly if it's executed with wit.

So if you think you're smart, it's time to show it. These 10 brainy, clever jokes aren't your typical one-liners. They need some thinking, some geekiness, and an appreciation for clever wit. If you catch them without checking out the explanation… well done, you're among the smart ones.

The Logicians at the Bar

Three logicians enter a bar.

The bartender asks, "Three beers?"

The first logician says, "I don't know."

The second says, "I don't know."

The third says, "Yes."

Why it's funny: All logicans respond based on logic, not liking. The first doesn't know all three desire beer and so says, "I don't know." The second knows the first desires one, but can't be sure about all three. The third, knowing both responses, concludes they all desire beer. Logical humor!

Ignorance vs Apathy

What's the difference between apathy and ignorance?

"I don't know and I don't care."

Why it's funny: It's a definition joke. Ignorance = not knowing, apathy = not caring. The punchline states the question in terms of the definition of both. Meta-humor at its best.

Schrödinger's Cat Walks into a Bar.

Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar.

And doesn't.

Why it's funny: A variation of the quantum mechanics thought experiment, where the cat is living and dead until observed. So… did it go into the bar or not? Both. Welcome to quantum punchlines.

A Roman Walks into a Bar

A Roman walks into a bar, puts up two fingers, and says, "Five beers, please."

Why it's funny: "V" (two fingers spread) is five in Roman numerals. It's a visual joke shrouded in historical information.

Pavlov Walks into a Bar

Pavlov goes into a bar. The phone rings.

He exclaims, "Damn it, I forgot to feed the dog."

Why it's funny: Ivan Pavlov is well known for classical conditioning, ringing a bell during dog feeding so that dogs salivate. The phone rings, and it stirs his conditioned reflex.

Descartes Walks into a Bar

Descartes enters a bar.

The bartender inquires, "Would you like to have a drink?"

Descartes answers, "I think not."

Poof, he vanishes.

Why it's funny: Philosopher René Descartes' quote is famous and goes, "I think, therefore I am." Therefore, if he doesn't think, he doesn't exist. Cue disappearance.

Heisenberg Gets Pulled Over

Heisenberg is driving and is pulled over.

The cop asks, "Do you know how fast you were going?"

Heisenberg responds, "No, but I know exactly where I am."

Why it's humorous: According to Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, you either know a particle's speed or its position, but not both. Physics geeks adore this one.

The Entropy Party

The party last night was crazy; it became so messy, it almost broke the second law of thermodynamics.

Why it's funny: Entropy is disorder. The second law is that entropy in a closed system will rise. A messy party = a clever entropy joke.

Two Atoms Meet

Two atoms collide.

One says, "I think I lost an electron."

The other asks, "Are you positive?"

Why it's funny: Losing an electron charges an atom positively. A pun incorporated right into elementary chemistry.

The Programmer's Wife

A programmer's wife instructs him to go to the store and tells him, "Buy a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen."

He returns home with 12 loaves of bread.

Why it's funny: The programmer interprets instructions literally, typical computer reasoning. "If they have eggs" is true, so he proceeds with "get a dozen"… loaves. Syntax humor for the programming fraternity.

Final Thought: Intelligence Is Sexy… and Funny

If these jokes did make you laugh and think, good. You've just demonstrated that smart humor is not only intelligent… It's funny too. Whether it's physics, philosophy, coding, or puns, wit and intelligence are a winning combination.

And don't forget, if you didn't catch them all, don't worry. Just say it was a Schrödinger joke and pretend you both did and didn't chuckle.

[chilig]

Schallaburg 

BYZANZ & DER WESTEN - 1000 vergessene Jahre 5 walls - 6 projections

On 17 March 2018 the opening of the BYZANZ exhibition at the Schallaburg took place. For this 8 month lasting international exhibition I made 6 format-filling wall projections and an additional video in portrait format. Bringing the illustrations of Angelo Monne to life was an exciting and interesting task. I first adjusted and adopted the illustrations of 6 Mediterranean coastal cities to fit the walls dimensions. Then I disassembled and animated individual parts. Starting with the sea, then single ships, sea monsters, animals, cars, clouds, ... It's like a stage set with several scenes and a holistic dramaturgy. The individual moving images have to fit together and into each other, to complement each other, to tell small stories, but to interact holistically. Connecting exciting worlds creating its own universe.

BYZANZ & DER WESTEN - 1000 vergessene Jahre schallaburg.at/de/ausstellung/byzanz-der-westen-1000-vergessene-jahre

Since March 17th, 6 large-scale projections in 2 rooms, together with the ambient sound, take the visitors of the "BYZANZ & DER WESTEN" exhibition on Schallaburg to a unique perception of illustrations.

Client: Clever Contents Filmproduktion - clevercontents.com/ Illustration: Angelo Monne - angelomonne.com/d/news/ Animation: Chili Gallei - chiligallei.com/ Implementation: Gregor Haushofer / clevercontents

Video: Chili Gallei, © 2018