#corruption nonsense episode. jane prentiss is better | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

soveryanon · 4 years

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Reviewing time for MAG184!

- That domain made me a bit nostalgic? Given how The Corruption had been prevalent in the first season, The Big Bad, The Threat On The Archives, it felt like going back in time and facing an echo of the worms infestation the staff had experienced back then. As usual with the latest season, and the “infinite amorphous blob of terror”: the presence of the swarm of insects directly put to mind The Corruption (which was confirmed by Jon this episode, since he mentioned “The Corruption’s influence” on this domain), but there was indeed a Buried feel to it too, with the narrow tunnels, the ants pressing on all sides and drowning Jordan (also confirmed by Jon when he speculated that “The Buried would flow in to fill the gap” if he were to smite the colony); and I also got a Vast feeling with the fact that the ants were so numerous, that Jordan felt like he didn’t matter much in the domain and was losing his sense of scale, and that Leto was attuned to the fact that he was an ant to the Fears? (“And for a moment Jordan’s sense of scale deserts him completely. Are these tunnels actually sized for him? Or has he himself been sized for this looping, intricate colony?”, “If we are as ants to those things above us that torment and toy with us for their amusement, why should not ants be like us, each with a life as rich and intricate as any person?”, “But no, it is all the same, just the endless maze and ants and tunnels, unnumbered minds, meaningless in themselves but together a being that dwarfs him, that if it wished to end his suffering could do so without a gesture.”)

I like (HATE, THANKS JONNY) how the ants felt like an echo of the worms themselves in the way they could inflict hurt:

(MAG040) ARCHIVIST: It’s the last thing I remember before blacking out. Tens of thousands of… things without mouths screaming as one. […] TIM: There didn’t seem much point staying, so I went into the tunnels. They were cold, dry. You know that worm smell? That earthy rotten smell? ARCHIVIST: Oooh yes.

(MAG055) ARCHIVIST: And there were no… complications? JORDAN: Like… what? ARCHIVIST: Surviving worms that escaped. Uh, movement from the body during the incineration; noises from it, like screams or chanting; weird feelings, l–like a thousand, tiny crawling things are moving across your skin? JORDAN: … Wow. No. Nothing like that. Just the smell, but, I mean, I’ll get to that.

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: “They shift and roil in dark and shining tides across the walls of the tunnels, pockmarked in their turn by tiny earthen holes from which the things emerge, retreat, and move as one. […] He does not know if this tunnel has the ants that bite, the ones that reek when they are crushed, or the ones so tough his weight does not destroy them, and he can still feel them moving, and squirming beneath his palm.”

They could inflict hurt through the biting, through that awful smell already familiar to Jordan, through the impression that they were indestructible and stronger than you.

I also quickly got the impression that the domain was harsher, even more implacable than previous ones, since at first, hope was absolutely absent from Jordan’s thought; the only “better” scenario was to not be covered by the swarms for a few seconds. In MAG166, the human “worms” were at least clinging to the hope of getting out, even if it was furthering their suffering (MAG166: “for what true fear can exist without hope, without the belief that things might change for the better? To tug at the knowledge that they will only get worse.”), but Jordan… didn’t have that at first, only the motivation of things not getting worse. Same thing with Leto, who was stuck in an impossible situation, with no way to spare the ants. Though, in Jordan’s case, hope finally appeared at the end of the statement, with his illusion regarding a “queen” that might be neutralised, which would stop everything:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: “The other man, that bloody omen of doom, is talking again, ranting, spewing nonsense about a queen, about finding her, about killing her. Leto struggles not to laugh; the words rattle around his mind in hollow recognition. There is no queen, he knows that. […] Jordan leaves the man to his despair, the words rattling around in his head. No queen. He knows that, of course, but sometimes he allows himself the smallest flicker of hope… that maybe there is a heart to this place, some core chamber, where the bloated insectile monarch might sit, vulnerable, and waiting. But no, it is all the same, just the endless maze and ants and tunnels […].”

(That was a trace of the Jordan we had met in MAG055: someone who was used to his job, who was fast at identifying causes and at acting upon them, who was used to neutralising pests and invasions. Except his logic and method, here, wasn’t the right one, because the domain operated differently.)

More on a few foreshadowing aspects of the statements, but the fact that Jordan was faced with a ~choice~ between two different tunnels, both of them having the potential to hurt but in different ways? Like Martin’s choice in the previous episode between the two possible roads (MAG183: “For us, there are two ways out. Two paths to London. One would be a long, winding route, we’d see a lot of horrors, but remain… personally untouched.” “And the other is my domain.” “Eventually. It’s a shorter path, with faces we know along the way. Including Helen.”), and Jon’s own decision to either keep going or do something for Jordan this episode? AWFUL, THANKS.

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: “For a moment he hesitates at a crossroads, two tunnels before him, one large enough he need only stoop, the other narrow. He’d need to squeeze. And for a moment Jordan’s sense of scale deserts him completely. Are these tunnels actually sized for him? Or has he himself been sized for this looping, intricate colony? He shakes off such thoughts. The ants remain as small to him as ever, and as numerous. He chooses the tighter passage. [SCRAPING SOUNDS] Pressed so closely there can be fewer of them inside, and those that come for him will be quickly crushed. Or so he hopes.”

I didn’t understand why Jordan had picked the narrower one at first, before he explained the logic behind it (trying, at all cost, to get the ants out of him)… and I hate that he was right at first, before it backfired. And Jordan’s fear, when he fell into despair?

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: “He flails, cutting his back against the ceiling, and freezes, the panicked thought gripping him, the image of those ants crawling down into his wounds, into his skin, hollowing him out – and making their colony tunnels of his veins. He screams, a wordless, haggard cry of despair.”

… It was to be turned into a Hive himself, uh? Which stung atrociously, given his own past brushes with The Corruption – John Amherst (who was protective of the ants), the wasps’ nest that had contaminated Jane Prentiss in her attic – and how he had detected a pattern and was suspicious that there could be others like them out there.

(MAG055) ARCHIVIST: So why make your statement now? JORDAN: When I helped incinerate her body, I smelled it again. Like before. Took me a while to piece the two together, but I thought you should know. ARCHIVIST: Are you… saying there might be more out there like her? JORDAN: God, I hope not! I don’t… know. The man from the ants house, he wasn’t like her, not at all. But that smell when they burned, I… think they’re connected, somehow. And that scares me. ARCHIVIST: Yes… yes, it rather scares me too…

Like with MAG163, I found it quite interesting that we got the other side of the story through Leto! I’m usually viscerally upset by violence between sufferers, but I was able to appreciate this one as just plain sad, and I don’t know what that says about me: is it that I’m getting used to it, desensitised to it? Is it because in this case, both Leto and Jordan came out of the encounter in one piece (although the domain would have probably reset them otherwise)? Is it because it felt a bit more clearly like two people stuck in a terrible situation? The first four statements had been extraordinarily violent when it came to victims hurting each other in the domain, but the lower scale (it was just Jordan and Leto, with different experiences and different fixations) and the quiet despair was easier to appreciate without reaching upsetting level for me?

When it comes to Leto:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: “Once, so long ago now that it seems almost like a memory of a dream… he knew these creatures, and they had known him. They had covered him, swarmed and embraced him, and he had, for a short, glorious time, known what it was to be loved on an unimaginable scale. For each and every ant was a life, a mind no lesser than his own, guided by senses utterly alien yet as vital as any he possessed. […] for that all too brief a time his senses were attuned to theirs, and he knew them, truly knew them. Unnumbered minds and existences all connected together as one – and they had loved him. When he thinks of it, it prickles his eyes with regret at the loss, the endless rolling mass of love that he had all but begged to consume him. But it is gone. His friends, the minds that he had once known so intimately, had left him. Now he sees them, moving and pulsing around him in a steady tide of tiny bodies, but he cannot reach them as once he did.”

Did he use to be a Hive in becoming? Would something like that have happened to Jane Prentiss if she had still been alive by the time of the Change, would she have been abandoned by the worms and lost her connection to them? The toxic love was another very familiar Corruption motive, here… And it was just sad that Leto was so concerned not to hurt what he still perceived as his friends, that his personal hell was about what he could inflict on them? It was so understandable that, through his eyes, Jordan would look cruel for hurting what mattered to him? It was miserable that what Leto feared the most only happened when he tried to act against Jordan – crushing and killing his friends, and then being stuck in a new impossible situation in which any movement would only cause further hurt, and inaction was the least harmful he could do. WHICH ALSO SET THE MOOD for what Jon would do later.

It was also an example of the domains only following the rules of what would hurt their victims the most (“as they tear at his ragged clothes that never fully rip, and always leave crevices enough for ants to hide.”), of events repeating and of memory potentially being tampered with since the Change (“so long ago now that it seems almost like a memory of a dream”, “the sick familiarity and bitter déjà vu of a cycle repeating itself once again”)!

- Ooooh boy, did that statement feel like a direct call out for both Jon and Martin: on the one hand, we had Leto, stuck in an impossible situation in which every action would cause further harm (hi Jon), and on the other hand, Jordan who still clung to the dream that there was a queen responsible and that killing her would turn things back to normal…

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: “The other man, that bloody omen of doom, is talking again, ranting, spewing nonsense about a queen, about finding her, about killing her. Leto struggles not to laugh; the words rattle around his mind in hollow recognition. There is no queen, he knows that. There is no single will to command the wondrous expanse of crawling lives: each and every one is their own, and together they are so much more. […] No queen. He knows that, of course, but sometimes he allows himself the smallest flicker of hope… that maybe there is a heart to this place, some core chamber, where the bloated insectile monarch might sit, vulnerable, and waiting.”

(MAG162) MARTIN: Do you think it’ll do anything? Confronting Elias? ARCHIVIST: [INHALE] I… [SIGH] Maybe? MARTIN: No, I’m serious. Do we… [PAUSE IN THE PACKING SOUNDS] Is there a chance that we can undo this?

(MAG174) MARTIN: Hang on, you’re still down to kill Elias, right? Uh, oh, Jonah, whatever. ARCHIVIST: I’m still going to confront him. [INHALE] I don’t know if killing him is something I’m even… capable of, but if I can and I have to, I will. MARTIN: Yeeah? ARCHIVIST: Don’t worry. I won’t hesitate. MARTIN: … Right.

(MAG177) BASIRA: … So what’s your plan? MARTIN: Long-term? Elias. He’s up in that that… “Panopticon” tower thing.

(MAG178) MARTIN: God, I hate all of these… loose ends…! ARCHIVIST: I’m sorry. MARTIN: It’s, it’s fine. [INHALE] We’ll just have to tie them all up in one go! ARCHIVIST: Hm? MARTIN: [SIGH] Around Elias’s neck.

… “There is no queen”, and killing the self-identifying “king of the ruined world” probably won’t solve anything at all. There is most likely no “king of the ruined world” either, and Martin better reach the conclusion himself soon, or he’s setting himself up for soul-crushing disappointment…

- LAUGHING for Martin arguing that nobody likes ants:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: Are you alright? MARTIN: Y–y–yeah. I, I–I mean, n–no, I just… ARCHIVIST: Don’t like ants? MARTIN: Obviously not, no-one likes ants, Jon. ARCHIVIST: As the embodiment of all knowledge, I am not entirely sure that’s true but… okay. What is it?

Because Mr “I like spiders. Big ones, at least. Y’know, y’know the ones you can see some fur on; I actually think they’re sort of cute” should Know Better.

But also: precisely, we’ve never seen any spider being Corruption. (It should be possible, if someone’s fear of spiders is related to them swarming and invading their home? Or would The Web intercede to still go “NOP, MINE” in that case?)

But also: sobbing, because the ants were so reminiscent of Corruption and of the worms’ attack… and that was Martin’s first traumatic brush with the Fears, and he had been especially victimised and terrorised by the worms. It was a very personal and visceral disgust for him…

- Martin and Jon had both met Jordan personally before the end of the world, and had their own reasons to be grateful towards him: he agreed to give the jar of Prentiss’s ashes to Martin (who wanted to assuage Jon), and confirmed to Jon multiple times and clearly that Prentiss had died.

(MAG041) ARCHIVIST: It’s… There are, uh… Jane Prentiss is dead. I know this. I have a small jar on my desk of what are supposed to be her ashes, though I don’t believe it for a second. I think… Martin just gave me a jar of dust to try and calm me down. Give me something to focus on, for closure. I hate to say it, but it does appear to be working. A victory for the placebo effect, it would seem.

(MAG055) ARCHIVIST: … Say it again, please. JORDAN: Excuse me? ARCHIVIST: What you just said, can you say it again, so I have it on tape? JORDAN: Oh. Okay. “Jane Prentiss is dead.” ARCHIVIST: … You’re sure? Completely? JORDAN: Yeah. I watched the incineration. ARCHIVIST: And there were no… complications? JORDAN: Like… what? ARCHIVIST: Surviving worms that escaped. Uh, movement from the body during the incineration; noises from it, like screams or chanting; weird feelings, l–like a thousand, tiny crawling things are moving across your skin? JORDAN: … Wow. No. Nothing like that. Just the smell, but, I mean, I’ll get to that. It went well. Nothing left but the ashes I gave to your friend. Which I shouldn’t have, by the way, so… keep it to yourself. ARCHIVIST: O–of course. And… thank you.

So I’m glad that they both were able to identify him.

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: What is it? MARTIN: N–no, it’s just… You know the guy you were talking about? Jordan? ARCHIVIST: … The exterminator, yes. MARTIN: Oh… [INHALE] I was having a look around and… I found him. A few tunnels over. ARCHIVIST: [INHALE] Yes, I know.

I wonder if Martin actually knew that Jordan had ended up giving a statement to Jon? Martin’s wording gave me the impression that he didn’t think that Jon would identify him as an individual without Martin singling him out, but I’m not sure. I liked (AND I’M SAD) that Jon was so hesitant about it, about what to do about Jordan:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: No, i–it’s alright, I, I’ve been trying to… I’m not sure what to do about it. […] I’m still not sure what to do about Jordan. […] Yeah, I just… I don’t usually know them…! [CHUCKLE] Jordan Kennedy did me a favour. He helped me with my own fear, a–about Jane Prentiss. […] MARTIN: … So what are we doing, Jon? ARCHIVIST: I want to see him. MARTIN: Fine, do your “knowing” thing, and then we can– ARCHIVIST: With my eyes.

With Daisy, there was only one thing they could do (Jon had been quick to point out to Basira that he couldn’t save her, and that the only option was to help Basira to fulfil her promise and kill what was left of Daisy); here, Jon might have already been struggling between possible options, instead of having to accept a single possible course of action.

- SOB, I’M SO GLAD THAT IT’S NOW CANON THAT ADELARD DEKKER TOOK AMHERST TO THE GRAVE WITH HIM TT_____TT

(MAG157, Adelard Dekker) “I can’t deny some pride in my solution, Gertrude. In all our discussions of how to contain a being that we could not destroy… I’m not sure we ever hit on a method quite so neat…! I am no builder but, by the end, I think you would have been hard-pressed to criticise how well that concrete had been laid – and Amherst four feet beneath it. […] But I shall not wait for it to putrefy as the rot overtakes me. I have dragged those other afflicted I could find into the Parkplatz, laid them at the feet of that appalling throne, and… taken the last gifts of that… generous construction site: a dozen cans of petrol. I will sit upon that seat, and release these poor souls from their suffering. [INHALE] And hopefully make things simpler, for the ECDC clean-up crews.”

(MAG184) MARTIN: Well… who’s the avatar in charge here then? That… Amherst guy? ARCHIVIST: No, John Amherst was encased in concrete and shrivelled away to nothing after just a few years. If they’d unearthed him before the Change… maybe, but as it was he was so starved of fear…

* I would have been heartbroken if Amherst had eventually managed to escape, but no! Adelard improvised, he improvised well, and his last actions were a success on all accounts (isolating Amherst permanently until he faded away, and at least allowing his last victims a merciful death since there was nothing that could have possibly saved them) TT____TT

(I’m still crossing fingers for anything about Dekker before the end (additional lore? His missing statement from 1991? A tape with his voice?) but I’m at least glad to know that he was successful, that he indeed made a difference before the Change, preventing Amherst from hurting anyone else…)

* Ahahahaha… Jon explaining that a fellow avatar “shrivelled away to nothing” because he was deprived of fear… right after Jon proved that being cut from The Eye was impacting him at Upton House… (Martin had connected the dots, understanding that turning the world back would not be good for Jon, but they also pushed back that conversation and… they really need to have it at some point…)

- Extra-relieved that Amherst is dead, since Martin asked if he was the avatar in charge in this domain: how awful would have it been, for Amherst to rule over the domain trapping Jordan… given that he had been Jordan’s first brush with The Corruption?

(MAG055) JORDAN: Got my first weird call about five years ago. It was ants, or so I was told. Down in Bromley. […] I watched as the door opened and a man stepped out. He was tall, maybe 6 and a half feet?, but it was hard to be sure of his shape inside the huge, brown suit he was wearing. He took one look at me, then the sign on the side of my van that read “Kennedy Pest Control”, and his face began to crease with rage.

I’m concerned, however, that Martin’s first reflex is still to cling to the idea that avatars are a necessary part of the domains, and that destroying them would improve the sufferers’ situation, whereas Jon had quite clearly explained that it wasn’t the case:

(MAG184) MARTIN: Well… who’s the avatar in charge here then? That… Amherst guy? […] So, who then? ARCHIVIST: Well, I’m not sure if… MARTIN: Jon, who is it? ARCHIVIST: It’s the ants. MARTIN: What? Ohhhh, like a, like a huge ant queen or something? ARCHIVIST: No. All of them. As a collective. MARTIN: [FURTHER SOUNDS OF HIS LACK OF ENTHUSIASM] ARCHIVIST: Crawling, devouring, spreading. One colony, one being… MARTIN: [DISGUSTED EXHALE] ARCHIVIST: One avatar. MARTIN: Right. Great. [SHUFFLING, BAG JOSTLING] … Nope. Nope, do not like that one at all, no. Okay. So what happens if you destroy them then? I–I mean, if they’re both the avatar and the domain? ARCHIVIST: The whole place would collapse and then, without The Corruption’s influence, I think The Buried would flow in to fill the gap.

(MAG174) ARCHIVIST: Uh… I’ve done so much damage, an–and anything that might help to balance that is–! [SOFT SIGH] … But killing other avatars, it, it’s not… I, I don’t think it makes anything better. I think it just makes me worse. MARTIN: … You’re removing evil from the world! ARCHIVIST: I, I’m not, though, am I? [STATIC RISES] The tenement fire is still burning; the mortal garden is growing wild; the carousel i–

Martin still hasn’t fully registered that “avatars” don’t matter that much in the new world (domains will keep working without them), and it was also blatant in the way he also concluded that there might be a “huge ant queen” controlling everything. Once again, it makes me afraid of the fallout when he will have to understand that Jonah is likely not the problem nor the thing allowing the apocalypse to keep running, even if he launched it… ;;

- The existence of the ants as both domain&avatar also makes me wonder about Helen: it’s basically the Distortion’s status, too? Jon had even pointed out last episode that she had a place like any other:

(MAG183) ARCHIVIST: Eventually. It’s a shorter path, with faces we know along the way. Including Helen. MARTIN: I thought Helen was her domain, wi–with all the doors and that? ARCHIVIST: She is, but she has a… position within this pseudo-landscape, like any other.

If the Distortion gets destroyed, which fear would “flow in to fill the gap”…?

… Is Jon himself an avatar who is also a domain, in some way…?

- Martin is still the audience surrogate in the way he asks the right questions with the information we were given to try to assemble the pieces together, but it’s also what he is doing for himself – he’s trying to understand! He’s trying to get the logic and narrow down what they can do!

(MAG184) MARTIN: Well… who’s the avatar in charge here then? That… Amherst guy? […] So, who then? […] Okay. So what happens if you destroy them then? I–I mean, if they’re both the avatar and the domain? […] I thought you said Smirke’s Fourteen was a load of bull? ARCHIVIST: I said it was limited, and draws artificial borders, but it does have its use when it comes to conceptualising these things. Regardless, I’m pretty sure we’d be left somewhat… entombed? MARTIN: But we could get out, though? ARCHIVIST: Eventually.

Yay for the Fourteen/Fifteen still being a valid and useful tool >:D (Though with the caution that it’s one reading tool, and not an absolute law.) I also like how Jon’s explanation flowed very well with what we had heard from the statement, when it comes to The Buried being likely to invade the place if The Corruption was diminished? Absolutely no surprise that Martin tapped out of the idea of getting trapped here since:

(MAG015) ARCHIVIST: I sent Tim to check the details – Martin declined to help with this investigation as he’s “a bit claustrophobic”.

So yep. Not up for staying trapped in a Buried domain for long. (And Martin might have thought of Jon’s Coffin adventure, too? Even though he hadn’t been there to witness Jon’s resulting PTSD afterwards. It meant a lot that Jon still offered the possibility given that it could have meant getting trapped in a Buried domain for a while, again. ;_;)

- Martin made some progress in understanding what Jon could and couldn’t do… except in this case, it turns out that it wasn’t exactly what Jon had said:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: I’m still not sure what to do about Jordan. MARTIN: I mean… What can we do, really? You’ve been pretty clear there’s no way for us to help the people who are trapped here as victims so… so we leave him here like all the others, and eventually we save everyone!

;_; Martin’s hopes hurt a bit – trying to see the bigger picture, pouring his effort towards a Big Solution, potentially to cheer up Jon by laying out a plan that feels quite simple (and awfully optimistic). Meanwhile, Jon had… not been that firm about his ability in the new world. He had specifically said:

(MAG171) ARCHIVIST: I don’t care. JARED: … No. You don’t, do you? ARCHIVIST: … I can’t… There’s too many. I can’t save everyone. [EXHALE] I c–, I can’t save anyone.

And I had been intrigued, back then, by that “everyone” turning into “anyone”… which wasn’t exactly the same thing.

- The point about them mostly knowing avatars was equally funny and indeed a terrible tidbit:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: Jordan Kennedy did me a favour. He helped me with my own fear, a–about Jane Prentiss. MARTIN: I sometimes forget that most of the people we know are avatars. ARCHIVIST: Yes, that… Hmm. Not sure I like that realisation. Our peers… MARTIN: Yeah. [INHALE] Dinner parties are going to be tricky, eh! ARCHIVIST: Hm!

Sob about that “ours peers” (including Martin. Martin didn’t protest but cut that segment shut pretty quickly. The recent news still stings, uh.), and Martin still insisting on “avatars” even though Jon snapped in the previous episode that the term doesn’t describe a clear-cut reality. (Gasp, is Martin implying that they didn’t have dinner parties with Annabelle at Upton House? Jon had mentioned he didn’t want to eat anything brought by Annabelle and Martin had pointed out that she was providing food for them.)

That “most of the people we know are avatars” makes sense story-wise? But it’s also true that all the characters we’ve met were avatars, or victims of the Fears, or touched by them through Jon, something Jon had kind of alluded to in season 3:

(MAG094) ARCHIVIST: Uh, no, I– I just… Ther–there’s been a lot of statements, in not a lot of time. I’m… I’m exhausted. I kind of wish I knew, uh, knew even one person who genuinely wasn’t involved. GEORGIE: Maybe that’s why you thought of me? ARCHIVIST: Hm? GEORGIE: I mean, it’s been years, and there must be other old friends you lost touch with. Maybe you did know? ARCHIVIST: Yeah, maybe. I, uh…

And mmmm… The Web has such a knack for storytelling, for activities revolving around the idea of crafting a story, that the question had to be asked: is it a coincidence? Is it perfectly legitimate given the circumstances of having worked at the Institute for years? Or did something influence Jon&Martin, for the only people they’ve known for the past years to have been somehow connected with the Fears?

- I love how we could perfectly understand that Jon was making a Face here:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: I want to see him. MARTIN: Fine, do your “knowing” thing, and then we can– ARCHIVIST: With my eyes. MARTIN: … Okay. But, just so you know, the tunnels to get there are absolutely craw– Yeah, okay. Yes, no, yes, you already know. [SIGH] Lead on.

Martin…

- The soundscaping of the ants this episode was AWFUL, and Jordan’s wails were AWFUL, kudos to Tim Ledsam, I hated it so much, it lasted for so long and was making me so uneasy TT__TT

(MAG184) [MORE SWARMING SOUNDS] JORDAN: [WAILS OF PAIN AND STRUGGLES] MARTIN: Christ… [BAG JOSTLING] Jon? JORDAN: You…! What are–? F–from the Magnus– Ah! Help me! MARTIN: … Jon, what are we doing here? JORDAN: [WAILS OF PAIN] ARCHIVIST: I don’t… I– JORDAN: [ANGUISHED SCREAMS OF AGONY] Help! Please! [SCREAMS]

I was a bit surprised that Jordan could directly see Jon? So far, only the Spider had potentially referred to Jon (MAG172: “It’s such a shame, but I couldn’t do such a thing even if I wanted to! The man in the audience saw to that! [CHUCKLES] I am no more free than you are, little puppet.”), and the Spider was part of the fear, or even the ruler of that domain; Jon had even pointed out to Martin that victims wouldn’t hear them, or at least not Martin (MAG163: “I–ignore them, they’re not… Just ignore them. […] I just mean there’s no point… talking to them. […] They won’t hear you, Martin, they’re all… too busy waiting to die.”). Could Jordan see Jon because Jon was already in a Beholding mode? Because of their connection, since Jordan had given a live statement and had been trapped in Jon’s Beholding dreams for two years, thus initially being Jon’s own victim? It was interesting that in this case, he could directly see and interact with Jon, and I wonder why it could happen…

- When Jon began to intone, I feared for a second that he was going to mercy-kill Jordan, since he had been pleading for help – until Jon reached the “Gaze” part, since… it was reminiscent of MAG120, so something different was happening!

(MAG184) [STATIC RISES: LOW AND SPIRALLING, PRESSURING] ARCHIVIST: Ceaseless Watcher, look upon this man– MARTIN: Jon… ARCHIVIST: –subsumed by terror and gripped with swarming fear. JORDAN: [WAILS OF PAIN] [DIGITAL GLITCHING SOUNDS] ARCHIVIST: Gaze into him, through him… and out of him. MARTIN: What does that mean? ARCHIVIST: Make him a vessel of your hunger… JORDAN: [WAILS OF PAIN] ARCHIVIST: … staring out and harvesting with a thousand, thousand, thousand, tiny, eager, eyes. [DIGITAL GLITCHING SOUNDS] MARTIN: Hang on… JORDAN: [WAILS OF PAIN] [STATIC INCREASES FURTHER] ARCHIVIST: Gift him your power and protection – make him yours. [STATIC DECREASES AND FADES]

(MAG120) ELIAS: “And at last, the Archivist looks up. [STATIC INCREASES] At last, he looks into The Eye that sees all, and knows all, and clutches at the secret terrors of your heart. The Ceaseless Watcher of all that is, and all that was; the voracious, infinite hunger that tears at his soul, invoking him to discover, to observe, to experience all and everything and forever. It stares into him, and it stares out of him, and he is falling into the devouring eternity of its pupil. He wants to cry out in horror – but he cannot. He. is. whole.”

* Regardless of what Jon actually does when drawing Beholding’s powers, I don’t liiiiike that he’s doing it in the first place, and I don’t liiiiike that it’s about Beholding taking ownership of people and their sufferings (“yours”) ;; Jon had mentioned that the smiting was “making [him] worse” (MAG174), I personally interpreted it as using Beholding’s powers, period, being something that makes him worse, and Jon feels so… frightening when he does this? Long-term, we know it can’t mean anything good ;;

* Martin’s incomprehension during the chant was so satisfying to hear; I found it a bit funny (Martin being absolutely out the loop and wtfh and perfect audience surrogate), and it also brings me relief (Martin reacting and agreeing that it’s something weird and off and potentially dangerous).

* SOB about Jon’s imprecation to turn Jordan into “a vessel of your hunger staring out and harvesting with a thousand, thousand, thousand, tiny, eager, eyes.”: a lot of statements, since the Change, have had mentions of eyes, of the feeling of being watched, as if they were relays for Beholding to feast on… and the idea that it would watch everything through the ants’ eyes is a horrifying thought, which makes so much sense.

Lore-wise: it… wasn’t an absolute surprise that Jon could turn a watched into a watcher, since Helen had pointed out that Jon was able to turn one into the other in the context of the Not!Them’s death, but never said anything about it being a one-direction mechanism:

(MAG166) HELEN: We’re all here, Martin. The Stranger; The Buried; The Desolation; all of us. But The Eye still rules. All this fear is being performed for its benefit. And so, there are now exactly two roles available in this new world of ours: the watcher, and the watched. Subject, and object. Those who are feared, and those who are afraid. And Jon, well… he is part of The Eye; a very important part. And he’s able to, shall we say… shift its focus. Turn the one into the other. And for those of us whose very existence relies on being feared, well… To be turned into a victim destroys us utterly. And very, very painfully.

Helen had also mentioned last episode that they were “all snoops now”, so… not surprising, either, that Jordan’s change (although bounding him to the ants and The Corruption) had to go through eyes…

- Sound effects-wise: same pressuring static and glitching sounds as during a smiting, except that we didn’t get the ripping parts (… since there was no smiting). I hate this static; it’s so well-done but it fills me with dread, “something bad is happening” feelings every time ;;

- Jordan BROKE MY HEART all through the episode, but him being confused and lost after his transformation was extra-painful.

(MAG184) [SILENCE BUT FOR THE ANT SOUNDS, A LOT LESS] [SIBILANT BUZZ, SIMILAR TO THAT OF INSECT WINGS] ARCHIVIST: … Jordan? JORDAN: Wha… Wh–what is this? ARCHIVIST: How do you feel? JORDAN: [QUAVERING] I, I don’t… I, I know you. From the Magnus Institute. What are you d–doing here? What is this? MARTIN: [THIN-LIPPED] Yeah, I’m curious about that myself. JORDAN: What did you do to me? I feel…

Jon and the other avatars we’ve met had to go through a process, with different steps. For Jordan, everything changed in one go – no wonder he was absolutely upset and distressed to get changed and to be suddenly relying on a new source of energy ;_; The new buzzing sound in the background already marking that he wasn’t the same… He was potentially physically transformed, too? Half-insect? How harsh, given that he used to be an exterminator and that Jon still identified him as that…

(As for the hisses-like sounds, I interpreted it as Jordan being directly fed the fears from his domain?)

- Amongst the heartbreaking bits, ALL THE PARALLELS with Jon and his own transformation as the Archivist.

* The fear feeling good and awful at the same time?

(MAG147) ARCHIVIST: What I’ve been doing to these people, it– … It hasn’t been because I was… “puppetted”, or “controlled”, or “possessed”. I wanted to do it. It felt good. … But at least, I know I can stop. I just… [INHALE] don’t know how. I… [INHALE] I don’t… want… to stop… … Goddamn!

(Season 5 trailer) ARCHIVIST: Yes, I, I’m trying not to, but… all of the fear, th–the anguish, i–it just… [INHALE] It keeps coming at me in waves, rolling over me, filling my head with such… awful sights. MARTIN: … I’m sorry. That sounds… [SMALL EXHALE] That sounds horrible. ARCHIVIST: … I wish it was, Martin. I really wish it was. … But it feels… right. [MIRTHLESS HUFF]

(MAG184) JORDAN: What did you do to me? I feel… ARCHIVIST: Better? JORDAN: Sick. [HISSING SOUND] Like I– [HISSING SOUND] [GASP] … What…? What was that? ARCHIVIST: You’re seeing it. Feeling it, the fear of all the others here. JORDAN: All that screaming… They’re everywhere… crawling over them, like they did me… It feels… ARCHIVIST: Good? JORDAN: … Yeah… But wrong. Sick. … What did you do to me?

(With Jordan potentially having his own Corruption-flavour to it? It might have felt “sick” to him because feeding from suffering is a twisted thing, but also because what feels good for a Corruption avatar is precisely what feels like a disease.)

* Jordan wanting to reject what he had become and insisting that it hadn’t been something he wanted?

(MAG092) ARCHIVIST: [EMPHATICALLY] I never chose this. ELIAS: You never wanted this, no. But I’m afraid you absolutely did choose it. ARCHIVIST: [SIGH] ELIAS: In a hundred ways, at a hundred thresholds, you pressed on. You sought knowledge relentlessly, and you always chose to see. Our world is made of choices, Jon, and very rarely do we truly know what any of them mean. But we make them nonetheless.

(MAG184) JORDAN: “Helped me”? I don’t feel right, I, I just– [HISSING SOUND] [GASP] No, I don’t– [HISSING SOUND] I don’t want this! [THE INSECTILE NOISE GETS MORE PRONOUNCED] MARTIN: Jordan? Jordan, just relax, it’ll be fine, you’ll be okay. JORDAN: No, I don’t– I didn’t ask for this! ARCHIVIST: You preferred the ants? JORDAN: … No! ARCHIVIST: Covered and agonised? I know how scared you were, I felt it. JORDAN: It was… It was a nightmare. And I couldn’t wake up. But this is, uh… I don’t understand…

Which made Jon into “the Elias” in this situation (as the person directly responsible for turning someone into an agent serving one of the Fears), and also showed how Jon, precisely, wasn’t Elias: their motivations differ greatly (self-gain versus sympathy/pity), and Jon didn’t try to gaslight Jordan by putting the blame on him via his “choice”.

* Jordan struggling with the idea of hurting others and feeding from their misery?

(MAG152) ARCHIVIST: [SIGH] … When does it stop? HELEN: What? ARCHIVIST: The guilt… The misery… All the others I’ve met, they’ve been… cold. Cruel. They’ve enjoyed what they do. When does The Eye… make me monstrous? HELEN: [LAUGHS AND LAUGHS, ECHOING] Why would it ever do that? […] Helen was like you, at first. She felt such guilt over taking people. Until one day, she realised she wasn’t going to stop doing it. So she chose to stop feeling guilty.

(MAG184) JORDAN: You turned me into what? A torturer? ARCHIVIST: Yes. JORDAN: … Why? […] I don’t… I don’t know how to be this. I don’t want to scare people. ARCHIVIST: No. But you’ll learn.

* Jordan feeling lost about his new status, what would happen from then on, whether he was still himself?

(MAG092) ARCHIVIST: I’m not getting any answers out of this, am I? ELIAS: The easily digestible sort, that wipe away any doubt and fear and neatly organise your new world into happy little columns? ARCHIVIST: [SCOFF] ELIAS: … No. Not from me. These are things you must discover on your own. […] ARCHIVIST: Am I… Elias, am I still human? ELIAS: Jon. What does human even mean? I mean, really? You still bleed, you can still die. And your will is still your own, mostly. That’s more than can be said for a lot of the “real” humans out there.

(MAG184) JORDAN: … Am I still me? ARCHIVIST: I don’t know how to answer that. I can put you back if you want. You could become a victim again? Rather than complicit.

Jon was absolutely sincere in that moment: he had questioned his identity so much in season 3 and season 4, and… hadn’t really found an answer:

(MAG093) ARCHIVIST: You’ve seen monsters? GEORGIE: Not the time, Jon. ARCHIVIST: Right, it’s… it’s just I think I’m turning into one.

(MAG099) GEORGIE: You’re not doing well. You keep apologising and saying you’re changing, but it’s all just the same. […] Look, you’re worried. I get it. But if you really think you’re turning into something… inhuman, you need people around you. You need anchors.

(MAG122) BASIRA: Jon, is it still… you? ARCHIVIST: Uh… Y… yes. Y–yes, I… I think so? I–I don’t know how you’d… prove it, though. […] They can be hard though, sometimes, other–other people. Feelings. I, I’m… I’m trying to focus. Trying to… make sure I’m… the same me as before, but… how can anyone really remember that? How do you know… you’re the same person that went to sleep…?

(MAG126) ARCHIVIST: A “Great Twisting”, that Gertrude stopped at the cost of a single life. … I thought… moving away from my humanity… would have made that seem more acceptable. That sort of sacrifice… But it just makes me sad…

(MAG136) ARCHIVIST: I… [SIGH] I don’t feel like I’m exactly in the best place to judge the… intersection [CHUCKLE] between free will and humanity. Still trying to figure that out myself. […] My memories of the coma are not clear. But I know I made a choice; I made a choice to become… something else. Because I was afraid to die. But ever since then, I… I don’t know if I made the right decision; I–I’m stronger now, tougher, I can… … If I do die, now, or get sealed away somewhere forever… I don’t know if that’s a bad thing. And I don’t want to lose anyone else so, if I can maybe stop that happening, and [MIRTHLESS CHUCKLE] the only danger is to me, I– I’ll do it in a heartbeat; worst case scenario… the universe loses another monster.

(MAG142) DAISY: And of course, for Jon, there’s survivor’s guilt in there, too. He thinks he’s not human. Makes him very… self-destructive.

I feel like, mostly, what happened to Jordan put them both in opposition to Jonah. He had declared that:

(MAG160, Jonah Magnus) “Why does a man seek to destroy the world? It’s a simple enough answer: for immortality, and power. Uninspired, perhaps, but – my God! The discovery, not simply of the dark and horrible reality of the world in which you live, but that you would quite willingly doom that world and confine the billions in it to an eternity of terror and suffering, all to ensure your own happiness; to place yourself beyond pain, and death, and fear. It is an awful thing to know about yourself, but the freedom, Jon, the freedom of it all…! I have dedicated my life to handing the world to these Dread Powers, all for my own gain, and I feel… nothing but satisfaction, in that choice.”

And we’ve seen through Jon in season 4, and with Jordan right now, that… no. There is no “freedom” in that choice. There is only guilt and despair.

(Jonah, you might have had over two centuries to rot and become like this, but by October 18th 2018, you were trash, and that was all you.)

- I also love/hate the complexity around the “help” that was granted: Jordan was pleading for it. Jordan wanted his hell to stop. Jon answered that call and gave what he could, and it comes after bitterly pointing out that his actions were limited for long, but that he was conscious of his power and would like to help somehow…

(MAG173) ARCHIVIST: I don’t know what you want me to do! MARTIN: I want you to use your power, I want you to help them, I want you to make things better! ARCHIVIST: There – is – no – “better” anymore. MARTIN: You keep saying that, and I hate it! […] What I know is that leaving children here is… i–i–it’s inexcusable, i–it’s monstrous! ARCHIVIST: Martin, tell me what you want me to do, and I will do it! […] MARTIN: The sooner we get back to the Archives, the sooner we can put a stop to this. All of this. They just… [INHALE] They’ll just need to hang on a little longer. ARCHIVIST: … Right. [EXHALE] Right.

(MAG174) MARTIN: … What is it, Jon, what’s wrong? ARCHIVIST: I–I just–! … This whole… “avenging angel” thing, I–I’m not… It doesn’t feel right. MARTIN: … It seemed to feel right when we were avenging all the wrongs done against you! ARCHIVIST: I know. I–I–I know, all right? But, well, th–… [SIGH] That’s kind of the problem, I have all this… power and, and I, I want to use it to try and help, but I… I don’t know, I mean, I do. Uh… I’ve done so much damage, an–and anything that might help to balance that is–! [SOFT SIGH] … But killing other avatars, it, it’s not… I, I don’t think it makes anything better. I think it just makes me worse.

(MAG184) JORDAN: You…! What are–? F–from the Magnus– Ah! Help me! […] [ANGUISHED SCREAMS OF AGONY] Help! Please! [SCREAMS] […] It feels… ARCHIVIST: Good? JORDAN: … Yeah… But wrong. Sick. … What did you do to me? ARCHIVIST: I helped you. JORDAN: “Helped me”? I don’t feel right, I, I just– [HISSING SOUND] [GASP] No, I don’t– [HISSING SOUND] I don’t want this! […] ARCHIVIST: What was I supposed to do? I owed you. Didn’t want to just watch you suffer. […] I’m sorry, the world is… It’s bad all over. I just wanted to spare you what I could. JORDAN: … Yeah. ARCHIVIST: Because… because I owed you.

And Jon helped in a way, made Jordan’s suffering stop, but… on the other hand, Jordan has every right to feel like it isn’t “help” at all, that it was a cruel action replacing an awful situation by another.

Just like with Leto, everything felt like an impossible situation, in which there was no good choice or good action to undertake. Should Jon have asked Jordan whether he wanted to be turned into an avatar, and lay out all the consequences and what it encompassed? Yes; but would Jordan, in the middle of being endlessly swarmed and bitten by the ants, have been in any state to understand and consider it thoughtfully anyway?

Should Jon just have kept going as Martin had initially suggested (without knowing that Jon had another option in mind)? Is it right to leave everyone in hell on their way, to ignore individual suffering when it happens right in front of them, while focusing on the big picture of ultimately saving everyone? Isn’t Jon’s spurt of pity for someone who had helped him in the past (and that he had hurt through his dreams for two years by the time of the Change) understandable, or is it plain favouritism? Meanwhile, doesn’t Jordan have every right to feel upset, given that this person changed his life and existence so drastically and made it another shade of bad without asking him?

Same thing with Jon giving Jordan the choice to be turned back: it’s… just complex for everyone. Jon could do it, it’s an option left to Jordan and Jon is being honest by sharing it with him. It’s the best he could do! … And Jordan’s distrust and disgust is equally understandable: unwillingly, Jon is also making Jordan admit that he would rather hurt than being hurt. But can we blame Jordan for this?

(MAG152) ARCHIVIST: … I’ve been thinking a lot about Jane. She was the first, you know? The first I actually… “encountered” like… [SMALL HUFF] like us. She seemed so… inhuman. Like everything she used to be was… stripped away…! HELEN: And now? ARCHIVIST: … I wonder how much of her was still in there. How much did she choose to be what she was? I read her statement, she was… [SIGH] She was scared. I assumed she’d been possessed completely against her will, but now I’m not even sure that’s possible…! HELEN: It is astounding the sort of things you’re willing to choose, given an unpleasant enough alternative, isn’t it? ARCHIVIST: How much of “willpower” is just… safety. Comfort by another name. The option to choose and be fine.

And, at the same time, wouldn’t the other people trapped in the domain have every right to hate Jordan now that their suffering is procuring him enjoyment?

It was like with Leto: every move, every decision, meant causing hurt, only in a different way. Jon had pointed out in the past that there was “no better”:

(MAG173) ARCHIVIST: There – is – no – “better” anymore. MARTIN: You keep saying that, and I hate it! ARCHIVIST: I keep saying it because it keeps being true, you know that!

(MAG178) ARCHIVIST: No one gets what they deserve. Not in this place. They just get whatever hurts them the most! … Even me.

… and once again demonstrated why.

(With the usual caveat that: Jon’s knowledge and powers are directly given by The Eye, which has already been shown keen on self-preservation with Eric’s tape explaining how to cut one’s ties to it. “There is no better” in Jon’s understanding of the apocalypse: but he’s not fully omniscient, he’s limited by his own point of view and by his own human limitations, and he’s not immune to making assumptions (just like when Daisy was able to hurt him, surprising him). There could still be other alternatives… outside of the box, instead of relying on his Beholding powers, just like Salesa’s camera had been something that Jon hadn’t known anything about before getting an explanation, just like Jon can’t see Georgie&Melanie, just like Jon still can’t see nor know what Annabelle is doing.)

- I am squinting a bit at Jordan describing what he was experiencing as a nightmare from which he couldn’t wake up, since… Jon had mentioned not being able to sleep anymore, back in the cabin:

(MAG161) MARTIN: You should get some sleep. [CREAKING SOUND] ARCHIVIST: I… [SIGH] can’t. I–I–I can’t, I–I don’t think I do anymore… “Sleep”. [EXHALE] How long’s it been, now? MARTIN: I don’t know. It’s not like there are days to count anymore. All the clocks have stopped, and… [DISTANT HOWL] ARCHIVIST: Well, I haven’t yet. I get… tired, but it doesn’t feel the same. [WOODEN CREAKING SOUND] Probably for the best. Sleep doesn’t look… pleasant.

(MAG184) JORDAN: It was… It was a nightmare. And I couldn’t wake up. But this is, uh… I don’t understand…

Is Jon “dreaming” in way, and does he need to wake up, somehow, for everything to stop…?

- I don’t like the contrast between Martin’s and Jon’s description of the current events:

(MAG184) MARTIN: I mean… What can we do, really? You’ve been pretty clear there’s no way for us to help the people who are trapped here as victims so… so we leave him here like all the others, and eventually we save everyone! […] ARCHIVIST: I’ll try to explain. [INTONING] The world is over. Dark powers that feed on fear have transformed everything we know into a twisted hellscape, where humanity is tormented to feed their hunger. We’re all trapped, but I have a certain level of “power” in this new world, so, I– […] I’m sorry, the world is… It’s bad all over. I just wanted to spare you what I could. JORDAN: … Yeah. […] I’d like to be alone. MARTIN: Of course. [BAG JOSTLING] JORDAN: No, wait. I’ll never be alone again, will I? [SILENCE BUT FOR THE ANT SOUNDS] MARTIN: … Come on, Jon. We should just go.

Martin is pretty clear on the fact that he thinks/hopes for a solution… but Jon’s description implied that no, he isn’t believing in anything getting better ever – he’s acting like the current reality will be eternal and won’t ever change. He didn’t even mention to Jordan that they were trying to fix everything, that hopefully, Jordan’s new state wouldn’t last forever because they would manage to turn the world back.

It’s not the first time Jon has acted as if there is no solution, but he had initially left the cabin announcing that he and Martin would “find out” whether it was possible to reverse the Change. Since MAG164, when Jon tried to take a peak at the Entities, it feels like… he has lost all hope in that regard? Does Jon know something that he hasn’t shared, did he deduce it from his Knowing from MAG164, or has he lost hope through lassitude and compassion fatigue…? (Martin! Martin, please, pick up on the fact that Jon’s words, for the last few episodes, are implying that he thinks this world will stay as is! ;;)

- I’m weeping for Jordan understanding parts of his new reality:

(MAG184) JORDAN: Can I at least… go outside? Can I leave these tunnels, the… the ants? Am I… free? ARCHIVIST: You’re part of them now. And they’re a part of you. JORDAN: Oh… […] I’d like to be alone. MARTIN: Of course. [BAG JOSTLING] JORDAN: No, wait. I’ll never be alone again, will I?

Still can’t go outside, still no freedom… And he’s now kinda the “queen” that he was seeking to destroy… he was vainly trying to flee the ants (to be alone!) and is now part of them… and there is still that awful irony of the exterminator becoming an agent of The Corruption…

- Regarding Jon’s powers and what he offered to Jordan:

(MAG184) ARCHIVIST: I don’t know how to answer that. I can put you back if you want. You could become a victim again? Rather than complicit.

* So, he could revert Jordan into a victim… without killing him? That’s interesting considering how Helen had explained what Jon had done to the Not!Them:

(MAG166) HELEN: And so, there are now exactly two roles available in this new world of ours: the watcher, and the watched. Subject, and object. Those who are feared, and those who are afraid. And Jon, well… he is part of The Eye; a very important part. And he’s able to, shall we say… shift its focus. Turn the one into the other. And for those of us whose very existence relies on being feared, well… To be turned into a victim destroys us utterly. And very, very painfully.

Why wouldn’t Jordan – now an avatar, a Watcher – die from being reverted to a victim? Is it because at this point, Jordan had not directly hurt people, or was familiar to their suffering (as a victim himself until a few minutes ago)? Is it because he changed status during the apocalypse, so was “created” as an avatar in the new environment and that changes things? If Jon were to meet him again waaay later, would he still be able to turn Jordan back just fine (like he just offered), or would it destroy Jordan because, by then, Jordan would have fed too much on the suffering? Or is it because it felt right to Jon that Jordan, who hadn’t hurt people and had been good to me, would be able to revert to his previous state without consequences, while in Jon’s mind, previous avatars and monsters were intrinsically linked to the pain they caused, so wouldn’t be able to survive the pain as watched…?

(* … Jon didn’t offer a mercy-kill like he did with Breekon, though ;; I’m glad that he didn’t, but would it have been technically possible…?)

* So, we got Jon turning Watchers into Watched to the point of destroying them (Not!Them, Jude, Jared, Breekon); we now get Jon turning a Watched into a Watcher, and he brought up the possibility of reversing the process once again, non-lethally… So turning someone from Watcher into Watched non-lethally is an available option, and I wonder if we’ll see that one actually happen…

- Although I do understand Jon’s unease about Jordan, I’m worried about his insistence that he “owed” Jordan. It’s… perfectly fine on its own, but it also made me feel like the phrasing and vocabulary of a god…? Because Jon would have plenty of reasons to want to improve Jordan’s situation (or to lessen his pain) without that one, and he had brought up that his motivation to hurt Jude and others had been “revenge”.

Was Jon genuine? Is it a bit of Beholding motivating him (rewarding the ones who had helped him and fed him fears; punishing the ones who had marked him)? … Or is it Jon trying to avoid that he felt guilt? Because Jordan wasn’t always afraid of ants, not initially: he was an exterminator, used to deal with creatures, who happened to brush with the supernatural during his work but hadn’t been terrorised by it. What might have turned the ants into his worst fear might have been… the fact that he gave his statement to Jon and got trapped in his nightmares for two years:

(MAG055) ARCHIVIST: … It’s been months, though. Why are you… just looking to make your statement now? JORDAN: Uh, it’s not really… it’s not just burning her body. I was also the one that was first called in to deal with the nest in her old apartment. ARCHIVIST: Oh… JORDAN: Yeah! But there are a few things I’ve been thinking about, putting some pieces together and I thought, well, you guys should probably know. […] I’ve never really minded. I mean, I guess I could say… killing things is sort of exerting control over them, but I’ve always felt that trying to sanitise my job is somehow a bit… dishonest. Like trying to help people forget that what they’re actually doing is commissioning the death of creatures which we’ve deemed… too disgusting or unhealthy to live. It needs doing, don’t get me wrong, and I’m happy enough to do it. But it isn’t my job to hold people’s hands and make them feel better about it.

(MAG120) ELIAS: “Behind him are the ants. They move like a terrible rolling wave along the hard-packed ground, and he can see every twitching antenna, every clenching mandible. Somewhere, underneath that twitching, burrowing mass, is the exterminator. He is screaming. The Archivist knows he is screaming, can see him screaming, although the sound is lost under the noise of those hundred million ants that crawl and scurry over everything. For a second, a hand breaches the shifting mound, desperately stretched towards the Archivist in supplication, pleading for help. The Archivist watches, as it disappears painfully back into that sea of scrabbling life. Then all at once, the ants are gone, fled in a moment away from the still shuddering form of the exterminator – and a familiar terror finally pushes its way into the Archivist’s heart. […] The exterminator looks to her, then to the Archivist, and it is not certain which he fears more.”

So, in that way, Jon had contributed to turn the ants into Jordan’s worst fear – and that would be reason enough to feel guilt about it, combined with the fact that for two years, Jon had been unable to help him in the nightmares.

- … On the matter of Jon’s dreams, it was noteworthy that at no point at all did Jon mention that he had seen Jordan suffer in them for the past two years. The nightmare zoo is apparently a sore spot for Jon? He had displayed a tendency to… just not talk about them, unless absolutely necessary (and awkwardly!):

(MAG113) ARCHIVIST: I’m not too concerned, to be honest, my dreams are, uh… well, let’s just say I don’t think they’re going be letting anyone else in any time soon. End recording.

(MAG122) BASIRA: How much do you remember? ARCHIVIST: I don’t… Music. Everything was… wrong. Gertrude was there, and then… Dancing – I think? Then… pain. And I was somewhere else. Dreaming. BASIRA: Dreaming. ARCHIVIST: Yes… [PAUSE] You’re… sure, a–about… Tim?

(MAG132) DAISY: I realised you were in my dreams. Reliving t… this. The coffin. You were there. ARCHIVIST: … Yes. DAISY: Didn’t think it was real. Not really… Just my mind putting you there, because I h–hated you but… no.

(MAG136) [SILENCE] ARCHIVIST: … Daisy. DAISY: Mm? ARCHIVIST: It, uh… Hm. Is, uh… Weird question, but… I… [EXHALE] I haven’t seen you in my dreams? The last couple of weeks? DAISY: … Oh, uh, no. I… I work here, now. I figured it seems to protect the others, so… ARCHIVIST: Oh. Right, so… […] So… no more dreams. DAISY: Not of you and your weird eyes. Just the coffin. ARCHIVIST: Is that better…? DAISY: ’T’s mine. ARCHIVIST: … right.

If Martin and Jon are on a journey that is mostly internal, what is Jon’s? Does his guilt regarding his dreams and the pain he directly inflected to live statement-givers (the fact that he fed on their fears, during the act and through his dreams) have to do with it…?

- I’m curious about Jon pointing out that Jordan couldn’t touch them:

(MAG184) [FOOTSTEPS] JORDAN: The ants… If I told them to attack you… could they? ARCHIVIST: … No… Nothing can really touch us anymore.

Since Daisy had been able to (MAG179: “I’m surprised she could hurt you at all…!”

ARCHIVIST: Yes, that… came as a bit of a shock to me as well, actually…! […] I mean, I know it sounds strange but it… it… felt right for Daisy to be able to hurt me.” “Dream logic again?” “Mmm. The… ‘resonances’ from our relationship before the Change carried over and–”). Why was Daisy able to, in the first place? Because of her connection with Jon? Could Melanie&Georgie do it, too…?

Jon sounded SO TIRED at the end of the episode…

- Martin tried to chirp in here and there, and was clearly peeved about what Jon had done, so I’m guessing they’ll talk about it starting the next episode:

(MAG184) MARTIN: Christ… [BAG JOSTLING] Jon? […] Jon, what are we doing here? […] What does that mean? […] Hang on… […] JORDAN: [QUAVERING] I, I don’t… I, I know you. From the Magnus Institute. What are you d–doing here? What is this? MARTIN: [THIN-LIPPED] Yeah, I’m curious about that myself. […] JORDAN: … Why? MARTIN: Good question. Jon? Care to enlighten us? ARCHIVIST: What was I supposed to do? I owed you. Didn’t want to just watch you suffer. MARTIN: It’s what you’ve been doing for everyone else…! It’s what you’re expecting him to do! […] JORDAN: No, wait. I’ll never be alone again, will I? [SILENCE BUT FOR THE ANT SOUNDS] MARTIN: … Come on, Jon. We should just go.

* (Aaaah for Martin trying to calm Jordan down, hearing his distress, and agreeing that it was a “lot to take in all at once”…)

* I feel like mostly, Martin had been thrown off because Jon hadn’t discussed what he was going to do beforehand? If they had done that, they might have reached the same conclusion, but given how Jon quickly acted, Martin was left to highlight the small hypocrisies (Jon said he couldn’t do anything, before; Jon wanted to do something, but he’s condemning Jordan to watch over his victims without helping them). I do understand Martin’s feelings about that – and also? Jon wielding Beholding powers so impulsively is extremely worrisome, I hope they’ll talk about that bit ;;

* It’s… also contributing to prove to Martin that his black&white dichotomy doesn’t really work in the new world. Since Jordan is now a Watcher feeding from the fear in his domain, since he is now in a technically better place than other victims, is he now entirely blameable? Should Jon smite him? It’s just as uncomfortable as with Callum (and Martin’s own situation, as unknowing Watcher).

- So, interesting that the people who had been trapped in Jon’s dreams weren’t concentrated in one domain, especially since Jon had pointed out that his domain was the-Archives-or-the-Institute-or-the-Panopticon (MAG167: “We all have a domain here, Martin. The place that feeds us.” “Oh. [PAUSE] Where’s yours?” “[MIRTHLESS CHUCKLE] I mean, we’re… traveling towards it.”). In a way, though, the whole world being Beholding’s domain might mean that it’s a bit Jon’s anyway…? I wonder if we’ll meet other old statement-givers on the way to London, then…

- Regarding Martin’s “journey” towards his domain: MAG183 felt Spiral to me, and this one was Corruption, which are two Fears who had victimised Martin too – he had been trapped by Prentiss for two weeks in season 1, he got lost with Tim in Michael’s corridors in season 2. Was it significant? Of other powers that likely left a big impact on him, apart from The Lonely (through Peter), there is The Flesh (Jared’s attack on the Institute when Jon was in a coma), and we already got a second statement for that one… (And perhaps Web because of his affinity for spiders? Vast because he had taken an avatar’s statement? Buried because of his claustrophobia mentioned in S1 + his worry when Jon went down into the Coffin?)

When it comes to the content of his self-journey: it feels to me, more and more, that it might be about his dichotomic view of the world between victims and avatars, his tendency to put the blame on avatars (and Jonah) instead of understanding how this world operates…? As this statement hammered in, there was “no queen”: at this point, I am entirely convinced that erasing Jonah won’t solve anything; he might have caused the apocalypse but his disappearance won’t fix the world. There was a bit of Martin in Jordan’s situation, in the way he had never asked to rule over a domain – yet, was now ruling over one, and was still agreeing that the alternative (being a victim) was worse. Is it about Martin admitting his privilege, accepting responsibility for the hurt he’s benefitting from, even if he’s not directly causing it and didn’t want it to happen in the first place…?

(…………… I mentioned earlier that another configuration induced by Jon’s powers could be to non-lethally turn a Watcher into a Watched, and actually… it could happen with Martin, as a temporary thing? Allowing him to become a victim trapped in his own domain for a bit, to see (and maybe interact) with his victims, learn about them, before being brought back as a Watcher…?)

Next episode’s title is… mmmm. I first thought of Manuela and Helen’s corridors, then of Jess and Karolina… but on the other hand, MAG183’s domain was already the second Spiral domain of this season, and MAG184 had a bit of Buried in it – would we get repeats so soon…? I could also picture End, but we got a second one in MAG180 and that was quite recent too. Title could also work for Agnes/Hill Top Road stuff, if perceived through a Web angle…? For the second meaning, it could mean lore about the world (again), and about Jon’s situation/status…

#long post/#tma liveblog #tma spoilers/#tma season 5 #mag184 #the magnus archives

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