#dear evan hansen secret santa 2017

[thatscrazyrandom]

Ha. Remember in 2017 when I ran a Dear Evan Hansen Gift Exchange by myself?

I feel like blocked that out.

It was a stressful time man.

I paired each person myself based on what they wanted and what they could give, both medium and ship wise.

There were so many lists...

[vndooms]

happy holidays @stonermurphy !! i am your @dearevanhansensecretsanta ! i am dead happy with how this came out and it was fun to do even tho i had never drawn noah galvin evan hansen, i hope you like it!

[littleblackneko]

Dear Evan Hansen Secret Santa Present

Hi @killingstalking5381 im your Santa for the @dearevanhansensecretsanta I hope you enjoy this fic and have a great holiday season :) Could It Be I Like You- by Connor Dante It was December 22nd, and the twist in Evan's gut grew tighter as he approached the Murphy household. Not just because of the shouting coming from the inside, but because he knew there was something wrong with him. Evan picked at flecks of stiff material coming off his cast. He steeled himself, breathing in and out deeply, trying not to panic. He was there to see Zoe. And say hello to her brother. As a friend. At least that's what he told himself as he reached out and rapped gently on the door. There was no answer, and the yelling on the other side continued. He didn't want to interrupt what was going on, but the reservation was in twenty minutes, and it took fifteen to get to the restaurant, plus time to walk to and from the car, and to get coats on and...and if they didn't leave soon, they'd be late and they might lose their reservation and… Evan knocked more firmly on the door. To get Zoe, he thought, he was here to pick up Zoe. Evan took a step back at the glare that the tall, lanky Connor Murphy had on his face. When he registered it was Evan, his face softened and he stepped to the side. "Ever heard of a doorbell, Hansen?" he smirked, the previous tension a distant memory. Evan's voice got caught in his throat searching for a reply, and he tugged at the sleeve of his polo. Connor chuckled as Evan stepped inside, "You know I'm kidding, right?" He then hollered for Zoe to get her ass downstairs in a tone that Evan hoped was also a joke. Evan said nothing as he tried not to examine the way the long, dark hair fell over Connor's shoulders in a haphazard but luxurious fashion. He startled himself at the thought and tried to force it out of his head. Zoe walked into the room then, laughing for some reason when she saw the two boys. Evan shrugged it off as something he missed, but Connor agitated. It was very clear as tenseness enveloped his body that he thought that she was laughing at him. He not so subtly flipped her off, snarling, “Evan’s here.” “I see that,” she said unphased by the sudden mood shift, grabbing her bright purple coat and throwing it over her shoulders. “C’mon, Evan, let’s leave him here to stew.” “‘M not stewing,” Connor grumbled but they were already out the door. ~~~~ After Zoe and Evan pulled away, Connor skulked over the couch, bringing his knees up to his face and burying a scream in them. Why did Zoe have to get up in his business all the fucking time? She knew this was a pressure point for him and she’d dug her stupid little fingers into it. So what if she thought he always looked at Evan a little too long? So what?! It didn’t mean he was gay or anything. Right? No, he couldn’t be. Absolutely not. He already had enough issues, he didn’t need to give another excuse for the rest of the world to hate him. But his sister insisted it was true, absent-mindedly stating that she thought that they would make a cute couple just to piss him off. Couldn’t he just want to have a friend? Was that so hard to believe? But no, Zoe wouldn’t stop poking at the nerve, the little dot of his being that was questioning whether the rest of him was right or not. That little part that agreed with Zoe. That little part of him that wondered why it would be so bad. That little part that just wouldn’t quit wondering what it would be like to kiss Evan Hansen. Zoe thought they’d be great together, but who knows whether that was real or just to frustrate Connor. Was it real or just a little game she was playing to put doubt in his mind. He wasn’t gay...he wasn’t! But he was starting to have trouble convincing himself of that since Evan had shown up at the door. Hell, he’d had trouble since Evan showed up in his life. If he wasn’t interested in Evan, why was he so frustrated that Evan was out with his sister right now? ~~~~ Evan did everything right: opening the car for her, holding the door, pulling out the chair in the restaurant, offering the thing as close to easy conversation as he could manage, so he was a little shocked when, in the middle of their meal, Zoe brings up Connor. More specifically, Evan and Connor. He feels his heart skip a little when she suggests, “Y’know, I think you two would be cute together.” He almost spews his drink, as well, but he’s not about to admit that. Was he mistaken, or was Zoe not viewing this as a date, but as an...opportunity to set him up with her angry older brother? She must just not like him. That has to be it, she doesn’t like him and she doesn’t want him to feel bad about it, so she’s making up this story that her brother has a crush on him. And yeah, Connor wasn’t a bad guy, and maybe they were kind of friends, but it wasn’t like that, he wasn’t interested in him like that. “No, Zoe, I’m not gay,” Evan tried to protest, but his voice came out in a whisper. “Having a raging crush on my brother doesn’t mean you’re gay. You could be bi, or pan, or anything.” “I’m not-- I don’t--.” He stuttered out. “I believe you even less than I believe Connor.” “You’ve talked to him about this?” Evan felt heat rising on his neck that he didn’t know how to explain away. This was ridiculous, right? Zoe didn’t know what she was talking about. He wasn’t...he couldn’t be. He couldn’t have been lying to himself for this long. “Well, yeah. Both of you, I just want you to be happy. Even though he’s a dick, you two would be, like, good for each other. And you deserve that.” The room was getting too small. The corners of his vision were hazy. His heart was pounding too hard and heavy for him to pretend that he was okay. Damn, and he hadn’t brought any of his emergency meds. “I need-- I have to-- bathroom.” He managed to spit out before bolting out of his chair. Zoe looked concerned but luckily didn’t follow him as he sped away towards refuge, a pair of exquisite eyes and long brown hair flashing in his mind that didn’t belong to Zoe. He quickly realized they had resided there long before Zoe had even mentioned the possibility to Evan. What was wrong with him? ~~~~ What the fuck was wrong with him? Connor was resisting the urge to yank his hair out, or just to do something stupid, anything, to get him off this trail that his sister had started him down. Because even if he was interested, which he definitely couldn’t be, but even if he was, there was no way he was good enough for someone as sweet and kind and beautiful as Evan. Connor was a self-proclaimed mess. He would never be good enough for anyone. And that’s when he realized he had thought of Evan as being beautiful. Fuck. He knew what he had to do. He texted his sister the plan (he was sure she’d be thrilled) and grabbed it before rushing to the front doorway to wait. ~~~~ After Evan’s panic attack, he had returned to the table, significantly more reserved, still fighting his realization. After the bill was paid, they sat in awkward silence on the ride home. Evan’s head was reeling over his revelation, and Zoe seemed apologetic for putting him into such a funk. All that was in Evan’s mind though was how he didn’t realize it earlier. He had feelings for Connor Murphy. How did he not see it before? Under that abrasive exterior was someone so beautiful and kind-hearted and he wanted him so badly now that he ached. Despite this discovery, what was he supposed to do about it? Zoe had implicitly stated that Connor wasn’t interested in him. She remained quiet as she messed about on her phone and Evan drove with his fingers tense around the wheel until they pulled up to the Murphy household. Evan was frozen in place until Zoe gave a sly smile and asked him to come inside. He obeyed , but his mind wasn’t in the present anymore. His entire mind was just worry, worry, worry now. Feet walked mechanically to the front door. “Evan, how about you go in first?” Zoe said, unlocking the door. Evan quietly agreed, throwing open the door. He was faced with Connor again, this time in a much different light. This time Evan knew what he wanted and what he thought he could never have. And then he noticed what Connor was holding above Evan’s head. Mistletoe. “This alright, Hansen?” Zoe had slipped through the door past them to offer some privacy, and Evan was thankful; he was sure his face was bright red. “Yeah, it’s alright. F-for sure.” Connor’s mouth turned up at the corners ever so delicately as he leaned in and placed a kiss gently on Evan’s lips. Evan’s hand came up to tangle in that luxuriously long hair and Connor cupped Evan’s cheek on the other side. Hold. Breathe. “That was…” “Yeah.” Evan felt the tingle running from head to toe. This time, though, it wasn’t anxiety or fear. It was utter bliss.

[amazingmsme]

Getting Over It

This is my Secret Santa fic for @dehkinky hope you enjoy & have a happy holiday!

"No no nonono FUCK!"

Connor didn't know what he wanted to punch more: his computer, or Jared's face. Jared had told him to try out a new game called Getting Over It. You play as a man in a cauldron, using a hammer to climb a mountain of obstacles. It had seemed simple enough, only Jared had neglected to tell him the controls were complete bullshit and the game itself was pretentious as hell. Combined, it made a creation that could break even the strongest gamers.

"Connor, you okay?" Evan poked his head tentatively through the door to check on him. Connor inhaled deeply before turning slowly in his chair, his head in his hands. "This. Fucking game. I'm gonna kill Jared."

Evan stepped into the room, "I-I'd prefer if you didn't."

"I'm only half joking," Connor deadpanned nd Evan let out a slightly nervous laugh, "I'm guessing you don't like the game?"

"Hell no! The controls are shit and the stupid fucking guy keeps mocking me every time I loose progress!"

"Then why are you playing it?"

"I need to finish it. I can't let it beat me."

"Ohokay. Is there anything I can do?"

"Emotional support. For when I inevitably fail."

Evan was taken slightly aback, "O-okay." So Connor brought his laptop over to the bed and Evan leaned against him, already trying to brace himself if Connor needed him. He watched as he slowly made his way up the mountain before loosing progress. It was an endless cycle that had by now lulled Evan into a calm state.

Connor had finally made a good bit of progress.  But then his damn hand flinched. And now he was right back to where he was 30 minutes ago. He wanted to scream, curse, throw the fucking thing across the room, but he didn't. Instead he just inhaled deeply and spoke, "I think I need a break."

"That's fine," Evan said, looking up at him and smiling.

"That game is the fucking worst."

Evan felt his lips curl into a smile, "Would you like for me to do anything?" Connor shrugged, pulling Evan tighter towards himself, "I think I just want to be touched right now."

"R-really? Okay." So Connor laid his head on Evan's chest as he placed an arm around his back, gently stroking his arm from his wrist to his shoulder. He could feel Connor practically melt underneath his touch. His lips turned upwards as he tried to fight off giggles.

"Oho my gohod it tickles soho bahad!" His voice was light and airy, with a pure and innocent ring to it, and it made his heart swell. Still, he asked, "Do you want me to stop?"

Blushing, Connor shook his head and covered his face. "Noo," he said, still trying his best to hide his rosy cheeks. Without another word, Evan continued trailing his fingers over his skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. Connor was a squirming, flustered pile of giggles for the rest of the afternoon, and he remained curled next to Evan's side as they both fell asleep.

[certifiedboyf]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Evan Hansen/Connor Murphy Characters: Evan Hansen, Connor Murphy (Dear Evan Hansen) Additional Tags: trigger warning, Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, POV Third Person, connor’s pov, their actual interactions are p soft, Friendship, Developing Friendships Summary:

My legs are dangling off the edge, The bottom of the bottle is my only friend, I think I’ll slit my wrists again and I’m gone, gone, gone…

Connor and Evan meet in a psych ward after their respective suicide attempts. For @shannonhutchins  and the DEH 2017 Secret Santa on Tumblr. @dear-evan-hansen-secret-santa

[ao3feed-kleinsen]

Snowdust

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2qk6b8o

by Fira

He wished he could say that this wasn’t about Evan. That this was just some seasonal depression that he could handle and get over given the time, and that things would be better after a few movie marathons under a comfy blanket or listening to some feel-good music that he could sing aloud to and forget about everything for a bit.

But… this wasn’t that at all. He wasn’t really sure what it was, just that it revolved around Evan. Which was just perfect, if he could say so himself.

Words: 3859, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Relationships: Evan Hansen/Jared Kleinman

Additional Tags: Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Friendship/Love, Pre-Slash, Winter fic, Mentions of suicide attempt, Jared realizes some things, prompt for DEH secret santa 2017

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2qk6b8o

[ao3feedtreebros]

Watching and Tugging from the Sidelines

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2zsyktm

by EstaJay

Jared watches as the start of a relationship begins to bloom between his dearest family-friend and a somewhat close acquaintance. Hopefully being teenage vigilantes doesn't get it the way.

Words: 7774, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Jared Kleinman, Evan Hansen, Connor Murphy (Dear Evan Hansen), Alana Beck, Zoe Murphy

Relationships: Evan Hansen/Connor Murphy

Additional Tags: DEH Secret Santa 2017, Young Justice AU, Developing Relationships, Cameos from BMC Christine and Jeremy

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2zsyktm

[ao3feedtreebros]

If I Survive, I'll See You Tomorrow

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2BwG5jR

by phoenix_risen

My legs are dangling off the edge, The bottom of the bottle is my only friend, I think I'll slit my wrists again and I'm gone, gone, gone...

  Connor and Evan meet in a psych ward after their respective suicide attempts. For the DEH 2017 Secret Santa on Tumblr.

Words: , Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Gen, M/M

Characters: Evan Hansen, Connor Murphy (Dear Evan Hansen)

Relationships: Evan Hansen/Connor Murphy

Additional Tags: trigger warning, Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, POV Third Person, connor's pov, their actual interactions are p soft, Friendship, Developing Friendships

read it on the AO3 at http://ift.tt/2BwG5jR