#doesn't help I over exercised yesterday and my shoulders hurt.

[anas-aspiration]

Run

warnings: violence-weapons- angst

summary: the w people attack Alexandria, y /n and carl already fighting are forced to huddle together and get over it xoxo. 1683 words

Its a semi cloudy day, perfect for relaxing inside and doing nothing. It was also turning out great. You woke up, got dressed, remembered you have snacks downstairs, and started cleaning up. When you were in the bathroom brushing your teeth you hear your bedroom door open. Peaking out you see its carl, not surprised, since you guys go back and forth “sharing rooms”

"Oh good your up. Did you finish the spare shampoo I had under the sink?"

You covered your mouth trying to be polite and not laugh at his sternness "Uh yeah sorry I can ask Daryl to put that on the list. You'll get it by tomorrow."

He furrowed his brow "K."

"Whats your problem its just shampoo."

"God my problem is you. "

You were taken aback at how fast he snapped back at you. He didn’t usually act like an asshole but you knew he would eventually get out of his little mood swing. Internally you decided to help him get out of it faster by arguing.

You rolled your eyes "oh please elaborate! Because I'm sorry your having a bad morning but that has hardly anything to do with me."

"you're useless. Your ass doesn't do anything except hang around your little friends and eat shit. What good are you?"

Turning from the mirror to him you mustered up the meanest look you could. Then popped the tooth brush out of your mouth and rinsed preparing to go off on him. Who does he think he is calling you useless? He was just your 'bff' yesterday and now he's acting like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.

"First I am not useless. Do you even think before you speak because that doesn't make sense at all considering I am the one changing Judith's diapers, cleaning both your room, hers, and mine every week, and on top of that cooking your meals, so please come get me when your attitude is looking up. Cause I don't know who put you in this mood but its your job to get out of it."

You walked past him scoffing. Downstairs you grabbed your walkman, a bag of grapes, rollerskates and walked out the door.

You had been rolling around the neighborhood for a little while, enjoying the fresh air and exercise. Eventually, you came across a bench and decided to take a rest. As you sat down, you reached into your bag and pulled out a handful of juicy grapes. As you savored the sweet flavor, your mind wandered to thoughts of Deana and her parties. You realized that you could really use some fun right now, and hoped that Deana would throw another one soon. In the meantime, you decided to listen to some music on your Walkman. You scrolled through your playlist and selected "Rehab" by Lana Del Rey, letting the cute melody wash over you as you enjoyed a moment of peaceful solitude on the bench.

You sat there soaking in your thoughts mindlessly eating your grapes. You started noticing small things that you didn't notice before like how lifeless everything looked when it wasn't sunny. It made you think of Winter which was coming close. The thought of Christmas warmed your heart, but made you wonder how different it would be celebrating during the end of the world. Surely parents want their kids to have something like that. You definitely would even at your age.

Or maybe-

"HELP"

You quickly jerked out of your train of thought at the sound. Was someone hurt? Looking around you didn't see anything. But something told you to get somewhere safe. You stood up gathering your things shaking, when you started hearing more screams. Startled you just grabbed your roller skates and ran in the direction of your house. As you turned a corner you saw the mayhem. People cut into pieces and random people running around with machetes and other weapons. Now officially scared out of your mind you sprinted as fast as you could.

Morgan was in shackles, people being sliced, beaten. You caught a glimpse of someone with a 'W' on their forehead. The group Rick and morgan were murmuring about got inside the walls and are killing everyone. As you neared the house you heard someone laughing close behind you.

fuck.

"No no no no" You Turned your head to see who it was and you almost started crying. A big, probably three hundred pound, man was running behind you with a spear. You picked up the pace still a block away from the house.

You looked to your right hoping Rick or someone was gonna shoot him but instead you saw a handgun laying on the sidewalk. You bolted to it and immediately picked it up and blindly fired two shots in his direction.

One hit his arm holding the spear. You went to shoot again but *click*. You panicked then he charged at you then you fell back. Now your heart was beating faster than ever hoping you didn't just get yourself killed. He was on top of you and you stupidly threw a punch but it hit him. Blood trickled down his cheek and landed on you. He hissed at the pain, not from your power, but from the four cheap and prickly rings you had on. Before he turned back to hit back you pulled out your knife from your boot about to pierce his neck when a shot sounded. You winced then realized Carl had shot him.

You quickly wiggled from underneath him as you had tried earlier then stood up and wiped the blood off your jaw, still in shock.

"I had it."

"Barely." He said in a cocky manner, but with some sympathy in his voice. "Are you okay?''

"um.........Yeah i'm okay." You said

Now you were feeling faintish after only having grapes as a meal for the day and all the stress you had just been through. It seemed he had noticed this too because he grabbed your hand and started guiding you through the chaos back home.

A couple of hours passed, you were boiling noodles for a classic spaghetti in the kitchen. It felt strange casually cooking a meal after what happened. But there seemed to not be any right way to deal with the fact that you almost become road kill.

Carl was upstairs probably putting Judith to sleep and getting into his pajamas. Your feet began to tingle, a sign they were falling asleep so you decided to stroll over to the counter and sit there after turning the simmer down. You ran your soft hands through your hair then slowly rubbed your temples. You heard him come downstairs.

"Hey y/ n"

You looked up "Hey Carl, whats up?"

"Nothin, just uh put Judith down. Are you doing alright?"

"Yeah i'm as good as I can be at the moment. I just have a raging headache. Also- where did the others go?"

"Oh they were helping people clean up, now their at Deana's." He paused "But I just wanted to talk to you about this morning.. Im sorry for being um rude. I didn't mean what I said obviously I was just well.. I don't know. I'm also sorry because its my fault you were out there when the people attacked anyway. Do you forgive me?"

"Yes I forgive you" you said slightly giggling "I can't stay mad at you for long but thank you for also saving my life. Even if it was your fault I was out there you could have chose not to save me, your best friend, but you did."

He smiled at the way you punctuated best friend "yeah" He sat in the chair next to you staring at his hands as if he was thinking about saying something.

As you rose to attend to the food, he said, "Best friend huh?" to which you simply replied, "Yep haha". However, the conversation took an unexpected turn when he asked, "Have you ever thought of like... being more?"

You stood frozen for a second, before realizing he was probably watching you from behind.

You had considered this possibility before, but you didn't want to complicate things by bringing it up. The thought of him rejecting you made you feel uneasy, wondering if he would be scrutinizing your every move after. You tried to shake off the feeling, but it lingered in the back of your mind every time you saw him, thought about it, hell even dreamt about him. You thought it was time to confront him about it, or at least bring it up in conversation. You didn't want to be paranoid, but you also didn't want to ignore your instincts.

"hmm well" you said teasing him a little "what do you mean?"

"I'm just being dumb or whatever"

"No, your not, tell me" You said turning around and smiling. This gave him hope that you would feel the same.

"It's just, I woke up in a bad mood cause I overheard you with your friends last night talking about me. You said I come on too strong and It's obvious who I like and-"

"Oh my god no carl" you interupted " I wasn't talking about you I was talking about Abraham and Sasha. I love them both but it's so funny watching their little friends to lovers trope"

He laughed "ohhh, my bad um" "Well sorry for that too. But what I'm trying to say is I like you. I thought you didn't like me back so I got mad but- It's okay if you don't like me back I just needed to tell you because I couldn't hold on to that secret anymore." he said nervously running his hand through his hair.

You smiled and looked at him. You felt like everything that you didn't expect to happen today was happening at the strangest times.

"That- well I like you too. I was too scared to tell you because I was afraid you didn't feel the same way"

"Really?"

You nodded.

He stood up and walked over to your spot grabbing the warm wooden spoon from your hand and pulling you in for a kiss.

pt2??

A/N! :

HEY!! first post on this acc lmaoo. I posted this on watt pad originally like a month ago along with two other imagines (if you wanna check them out: leinsburg666) I wont be posting them here bc personally i think they are booty and i wrote them two months ago I’m obviously a new person duhh. but anyways i’m gonna write some more like this and PLEASE leave requests like good lord i will probably reply to all of them since i’m not sure a lot of people will see this bc the carl/reader fandom died in like 2018. hope this was enjoyable thoo 🩷

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

White Lies (Pt. 10 of 21)

Pairing: Keanu Reeves X Reader

Word count: 2.5 K

Summary: Keanu found the girl almost dead, in the wrecks of what was once her car. While she was in surgery, stuck in a coma, he gathered the best doctors of New York to attend to her. They told him she is likely to have some kind of brain damage, what may lead to memory loss. And this possibility added up wit the fact that she's pregnant, made the council come up with an odd idea. They asked Keanu to pretend to be her husband, since the stress of finding out everything that happened could put the baby in danger. He reluctantly agreed, but only if she does has some kind of memory loss. He still goes she'll wake up soon, with her memories intact.

But when you finally wake up, there's nothing inside. You're quick to find your head is empty, void, like a blank canvas. The only thing that brings you some relief, that makes you feel less lonely is the mention of a husband. And you can't wait to meet him, because you know you can't deal with this by yourself.

<- Previous part (09)

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{Keanu Reeves Masterlist}

{John Wick Masterlist}

×

Candle Lights

Keanu is driving back home after your third antenatal class. You enjoy them, but most of the things they say you already know. But it's not their fault you and Keanu do a lot of reading and research, and your doctors keep you updated. But you want to keep going.

“I'm thinking about a cesarian.” You tell Keanu, both hands cupping your bump.

“What?” He glances at you, and his face makes you giggle. “You have to be kidding me.”

“Why?” You ask, stretching your arm to touch the back of his neck.

“Because labor is something natural. Your body knows what to do.”

“Yeah, it just hurts like a bitch.” You snap back, playing with his hair.

“I know.” He sighs. “It's your call. You're the one delivering the baby.”

“I'm not sure yet. But we still have time.” You're currently in the middle of week 18. You feel more comfortable, and you have more energy now. The bump already shows depending on what you wear, but there's still a long way to go. “And we need to talk names, by the way.”

“I thought we decided on Clarissa or Henry.”

“Yeah, but we gotta be one hundred percent sure. Are you one hundred percent sure?”

“Now that you're talking about it, no.” Keanu giggles, a hand coming to lay on your thigh. “What were the other options?”

“Sophie, Nicole, Ethan, and Liam.” You recite them, looking at the landscape outside your window.

“They're all great. But... Liam. I like Liam. Or Sophie.” He takes a turn left, entering the condo.

“I like them too.” It's always like this. Whenever you bring this up, you just can't decide. “Maybe it'll get easier once we know the sex. Because we're clueless so far.”

“Do you want one of those parties where the sex is revealed?”

“No. It's not like I'd know the guests so...” Pushing this thought back before it starts bothering you, you sigh. “Let's just keep it between us. The rest of the world will find out eventually, but let it happen when it happens.”

“Alright.” As he slows down and stops to wait for the garage door to open, you see Mrs. Jackson walking to her front door. She spots you and waves. You immediately remember the amazing brownies she makes, and you suddenly need it.

“I'll go say hi.” You tell Keanu before leaning for a kiss and stepping out of the car.

Mrs. Jackson is a kind old lady who lives with her husband in the house on the left. When she sees you coming her way she stops, smiling. “Hello, (Y/N). Good morning.” Her long white hair is being blown by the wind, and she keeps it off her face with a hand.

“Good morning, Mrs. Jackson. How are you today?” Smiling, you hug her.

“You can call me Anne, child, it's alright.” She immediately touches your belly. “And how is this tiny little human? Are you eating well, honey? Exercising?” She raises an eyebrow, tilting her head at your house. “Is your husband taking good care of you?”

“Yes, yes, and yes.” Giggling, and blushing a little, you nod. “I have weekly appointments with my nutritionist, Keanu and I take a walk every morning around the neighborhood and he's being absolutely amazing.” You say with a sigh, your heart beating a little faster just at the mention of him.

“Are you falling for him?” With both hands on her hip, Mrs. Jackson inquires, a funny expression on her face. She knows about the accident since she has become a friend of yours.

“I am.” You mutter, biting your lip.

“That's true, genuine love, sweetie. Even after forgetting him, you're falling for him all over again.” She has a teasing look on her face that makes you blush even more.

“Yeah, I guess you can say that. In the beginning, I really thought we'd end up divorced.”

“Honey, you don't know the way Keanu looks at you.” She shakes her head no, taking your arms and pulling you to a seat on the steps that lead to her porch. “When you came for dinner earlier this week, I could see it clearly. He looks at you like you're his whole world.” Running a hand through your hair, you look down. “That man loves you with all his heart, I have no doubt.” She puts an arm around your shoulders.

“Yeah...” You mutter, a low chuckle leaving your lips. “Oh, sorry for yesterday's noise. We're changing a few things in the house for the baby and also working on the decoration. Since we just moved and everything is happening at the same time...”

Anne furrows her eyebrows a little, tilting her head to the side. “Honey, Keanu has been living here for a little more than a year before you came. It was a surprise to me as it was for everyone to find he was married.”

Mimicking her expression, you start thinking, counting. Keanu said you came here only a few weeks before the accident. “Well... We were keeping it a secret. He's a public figure so the goal was to keep the marriage private for as long as we could. But the accident happened.” The words come out slow, as you try to understand what she means by that. A year... It can't be.

“I don't blame you for doing that.” Squeezing your shoulders a little, she smiles. “People can be very intrusive with celebrities.”

“Keanu's fans are great. We bumped into some on our way to the Walmart a while ago. And Ke was kind, as always.”

“That man is a rarity.”

“He is.” Smiling, you look at her, remembering about your current craving. “Oh, do you think you can make some of those chocolate brownies?” You ask, pouting a little. “I hate to give you trouble but I really want them.”

“Don't worry, child.” Anne giggles, taking your hand in hers. “I'm retired for way too many years and I enjoy having something to do.”

“Thank you!” Pulling her into a hug, you place a kiss on her cheek. “I gotta go now.” Pushing yourself up, you jump to the sidewalk. “Important talking about this little one's name.”

“Won't you tell me the options?”

“Nope!” Winking at her, you start walking backward. “It's going to be a surprise.” With another wave, you turn around and head home.

Keanu is in the kitchen, starting with the preparations for dinner. Homemade pizza night, and he's just starting to make the dough. Moving to seat on the kitchen island, you're just about to ask how you can help when what Anne said comes back. That was certainly weird, but you don't think Keanu would lie to you like that. “Ke...” You make a small pause when he looks at you over his shoulder. “Mrs. Jackson said you were living here for like a year. But you told me we came to New York a few weeks before the accident.”

He stops, both his hands dirty with flour. There's something in his face you can't read, as Keanu avoids looking at you. “We bought the house about a year ago. I used to come and spend a day or two because of work, but we only actually moved when you found a good job here.” He speaks slow, only lifting his eyes when he's done speaking. You work with social services, and he said that your job is secure for when you're able to go back.

“Got it.” You mutter, furrowing your eyebrows a little. “Are you alright?” Getting up, you walk over him. Once you're close, he has no choice but stares into your eyes. Wrapping your arms around his midsection, you tiptoe to kiss him.

“I'm great.” When you step away, Keanu touches your nose in a quick motion, getting it dirt with flour.

“I can't believe you did that.” You giggle, stretching your arm to shove your fingers inside the bowl before showing them to your husband. “If you don't apologize, sir, I'll paint all this pretty face of yours.”

“Is it a threat?” Keanu inquires, raising an eyebrow.

“It's a promise.”

“Alright then.” He chuckles before cupping your face with both hands, getting your cheeks and jaw covered in flour.

“You're playing with fire!” You shout, running your fingers through your face before reaching for the bowl and taking a handful of flour that you succeed to half throw it at him, with half of it falling on the sink. He holds your dirty hand, some parts of his hair all white. “You're messing with the wrong pregnant lady, babe.”

“I surrender.” He says in between giggles, hands raised. “I'm completely at your mercy.”

Squinting your eyes at him, you only grunt before washing your hands. “Let me help you.” You say as you grab the dishcloth, damping it before starting to clean Keanu's face.

“No. Let me do this for you. Just sit there looking beautiful.” Once you're done with his face, you clean yourself the best you can.

“Only if I get to see you around the kitchen looking handsome.” Sassing back, you leave the dishcloth on the sink and head back to your place at the kitchen island. You love helping him, but you decided to let him do his thing this time.

By nightfall, the pizzas are in the oven. All three of them, despite knowing you won't eat that much. But one is for Mr. and Mrs. Jackson, and the other two will probably cover up all meals for a while. That if Keanu doesn't bug you with eating super healthy on every single meal. The brownies arrive too, and you thank Anne a lot as you bite one of them.

The only thing to ruin the night, well, that got close to, was that the sudden violent wind caused a blackout. You were eating at the kitchen table when it happened, and Keanu left to check if there was anything he could do. There isn't, but he did find some candles and the pizza night became a lot more romantic instantly.

Right now, already satisfied after two slices only, you admire his face in the different lighting, his hand holding yours over the table.

“We should go out. Like a date.” He suggests, and it makes your smile grow wider. “If that's alright with you.”

“Of course it is. We're married.” Shrugging your shoulders, you notice the subtle change on his face. You never get it, it's a mystery. “Ke, what's wrong?” It's not the first time it happens, but even though you're getting to know him, learning to read his expressions, this one is still difficult.

“Nothing, beautiful. It's nothing.” He assures you in a low voice. “Do you wanna head upstairs? A shower lit by candles must be quite an adventure.”

He always does that. He says it's nothing and changes the subject... But you guess it's alright. Maybe Keanu remembers the accident. The wife he lost that day. Or maybe something you shared before that's completely gone for you. “Great.”

“You can go first. I'll clean this up.”

“Leave the dishes to me. I can do them tomorrow.” You say as you walk past him, a hand on his shoulder. “You already made dinner for us.”

“Alright.” He agrees and you smile before going upstairs.

Showering with nothing but candles to light up the bathroom is weird, and you almost slipped. And that you'll never tell Keanu or else who knows what he'll do. But it was different. Once you're done, you leave the bathroom loosening the bun you had your hair in, letting it down. “Your turn with the medieval style shower.”

“I didn't know they had bathrooms like this back then.” Keanu snaps at you, smirking.

“You couldn't just go with it, could you?” Rolling your eyes, you walk over the slide glass door that leads to the balcony, just to watch as the wind still rushes through.

“Absolutely not.” It's the last thing you hear before the door closes.

With your eyes on the street down there, you hope this wind won't bring anyone trouble by tomorrow. At least the news said the weather will get better in a couple of days.

After some minutes watching the threes bending under the weight of the wind, you walk back to the bed, sitting on the edge. This place is feeling more like home as the days go by, and you're falling back into the life you once had. And it's good. Despite all the medicine you still take, the endless appointments, and a very, very overprotective husband, everything is good. More than that, actually. It does bring you relief to know you were this happy before. That you weren't alone, that you somehow managed to find someone so amazing. You know it was probably difficult in the beginning, with him being a public figure, and so many years older, but look where you are now. It was worth it. It ended up in the best way possible. And you couldn't ask for anything else.

“Lost in thoughts?” His voice startles you, as he comes from the bathroom.

“A little.” Getting on your knees on the bed, you cross it until you're face to face with him. Well, he's still taller, but you don't mind. You like it a lot, actually. Smiling you wrap your arms around his neck. “But they were good thoughts.”

“That's good to know.” He whispers, and you can't resist the proximity, so you just kiss him.

It was supposed to be just a quick thing, soft and sweet, but it soon becomes too needy. You shouldn't be this needy, and you don't know where it comes from. But it doesn't take much until you're awkwardly wrapping your legs around his waist, but the sudden change of balance makes you fall back on the bed, giggling through the kiss. But you don't mind. You don't want this to stop.

But you sigh when Keanu pulls away, opening your eyes to look at him, his eyes barely lit by the two candles, one on each nightstand. “What?” You ask, your voice a little weak, you're not sure why.

“If we keep this going...” His voice fades, and you feel when he removes some of his weight from you. He wasn't crushing you, but you were feeling all of his body. “...I don't think we'll be interrupted this time.”

You get what he means. There won't be calls this time, nothing too put a stop to whatever is going to happen. But you don't care. He's your husband, and you're falling for him. You want this. “I don't want it to be interrupted, Ke.” You tell him, thanking the darkness because you're sure you never blushed this much.

“Are you sure you want this?” A thunder almost clouds his voice, but you manage to hear it.

It's kind that he still wants to know how you feel. Keanu doesn't push you, he never has. It suddenly snaps that you love him, that this is right. “I'm sure.” You whisper back, eyes closing again when Keanu leans in for another kiss.

×

@multific @inumorph @aestheticallywinchester @bvbwestfall @liviiii98 @allie1804-fan @gian-giannina @playboygeniusphilanthropist @partypoison00 @mariafetamina @fortheloveoffanfic @trin303

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

❛ A LOT OF SAND AND WAVES ❜

with Obispo ‘Bishop’ Losa.

Request: none. Yesterday I went to the beach with my family and that fluffy idea came to me like a flash light. Thanks to everyone who help me to decide!

Word count: about 3.1k

Warnings: none. Just a bunch of fluff.

Aurora says: this writing hasn't been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I'm sorry about that!

Gif credits: @thedevilsmoonshine

Masterlist.

“Hey, girl!”

“Hey, what’s up, Leti?”

“Are you working?”

“Yeah, till four, why?”

“Don’ ask me how I did it, but I convinced the guys to go tomorrow to the beach. In San Diego”.

“Sounds good, but I’m not sure if I could go. I have a surgery waiting, and you know…”

“Yeah, your hands. Is it too long?”

“Maybe six or seven hours, not sure”.

“C'mon, mami! You said you don't work until next Thursday!”

Gilly's shouts make you laugh rubbing your eyes.

“Okay I'll try, I'll try. I promise”.

“We will go to Mission Bay. So if you want, we see you there!”

Hanging up the call and giving a last sip to your coffee, you throw the empty paper cup to the bin. Checking the hour on your phone, you know that it's going to be a long, long night. But the idea of spending some time with Bishops makes you tickle in your stomach. Coco introduced you to the crew almost a year ago, like a friend, and he stole your attention. At the first party you joined them, you were almost the whole dawn with him. Dancing, drinking, talking. He was more interesting and funny than you could think, and maybe you felt somekind of connection that you never felt before. So, yes. You would like to go with them, but you have to wait till waking up tomorrow to find out if your hands can handle a four hours trip driving.

“Good morning, bella durmiente! How was the surgery?”.

“Hm… my hands are fucked”.

“So, it went well, we have to celebrate it”.

“Yeah, but… not sure if I can drive to San Diego”.

“Oh, c'mon, please… We're gonna stay here by night too. Coming back tomorrow, take a bus! I'm sure Bishop would b—”.

“Stop!” You say laughing loud to your phone over the bed, while you do some exercise with all your fingers to bring back some mobility.

“(Y/N), you know that it's an amazing opp— Angel already bought you a ticket. In one hour. Sending you by email, bye!”

Before you can complain about it, she has already hung up the call. You end up serving some coffee in a termo, before picking up your towel and some clean clothes, besides an external battery and some hygienic stuff. Bandaging your hands, over a thin layer of cortisone cream, you're ready to walk to the bus station of Santo Padre, ten minutes away from your house. At least, you have three hours of trip to rest a little more, falling asleep as soon as you sit down on your seat. So the next time you open your eyes, you're already in San Diego. Waiting for the other passengers to get out, closing and opening your hands once and again, you step out then. Carrying your bag in your right shoulder and your phone in the left hand, you wear the pair of sunglasses looking for Bishop.

“Eh, boxer”.

His hoarse voice calls your attention, finding him next to the entrance, resting against his motorbike. You can't help but draw a soft and tired smile on your lips, leading your steps towards him, raising both hands on air to show the man your cool white bandages with black stripes. The mexican receives you into his arms in a gentle and dearly hug, surrounding your lower back and your neck for some long seconds.

“The guys are waiting for us to have lunch”.

“Cool… Last time I ate was nine and it was dark”. You just say placing well on your bag, before setting on the helmet.

The drive doesn't take you more than ten minutes, grabbed to Bishop's abdomen and with your chin over his shoulder. You can see him smiling like a fool, knowing that he's delighted that you're going to join them. But mostly, because you are with him. The warm and soft breeze of San Diego makes you close your eyes, fully relaxed, focusing on the smell that floods your lungs, mixing the salty ocean's and Bishop's scent. Your arms surround his body somewhat tight, feeling one of his hands caressing your right thigh with his huge hands placed on and his thumb making the honors over your skin, bristling it without mercy. But much to your regret, the engine stops some short minutes before, standing up from the bike when you're able to do it.

“Give me your bag, querida. I'm going to be your nurse today”. He says, after keeping the helmet you used with the other.

“Qué caballeroso…” (What a gentleman). You tease him, as if normally he isn't.

“Just earning a beach-quickl—”.

“Fuck, Bishop!” You laugh, hitting his shoulder, regretting it immediately when a lash of pain crosses your palm.

“That's called karma”. He says walking backwards to the entrance, pointing you with a finger. “The women are always asking for men's sincerity, and when we give you… You're too violent to be this small, preciosa”.

“Pendejo”.

“YAY, YOU CAME!” Leti looks surprised, making you twist back your head confused.

“Sounds like if… I had another option”. You purr with your lips, before greeting the guys. “Tell me y—”.

“I did”. Taza just says, seeing you pout at him before hugging you. “I will give you a massage later”.

“Mi angelito de la guarda”. (My guardian angel). You can't help but sigh a little alleviated, knowing that he brought a cream he makes with weed oil, coco water and aloe vera.

Actually, it was a good idea to come to the beach, having so much fun in the lunch by seeing all the men more relaxed than in Santo Padre. Being normal people. A family enjoying two days off from all the problems and the dangers they're sinked in every damn day. Bishop was focused on you the whole time, serving your drink in the glass, cutting your food into pieces so you can have to do any effort (...). Everything under the sideways looks of the others. Sometimes you look like another couple with simple gestures, that both do delighted.

After having full enough your stomachs, the guys lead you to the beach where they left the umbrellas and the towels, placing yours next to Bishop's and sitting there after taking off your clothes, but on your black bikini. Unveiling your hands, you do your best to spread the sunscreen all over your body, until the mexican grabs the bottle from your fingers to sit behind you with a ‘lean forward’ on his lips. Feeling his cold hands because the cream on your back gives you a soft chill, curling your legs against your chest and resting your chin over them. Closing your eyes, focusing all your senses on every move he does, you try not to fall asleep. Starting by your shoulders and pressing your neck with both thumbs, his hands travel down your spine making sure he's helping you to get somewhat less tense, at the same time that puts well on the sunscreen.

When it's ready, he stands up on his feet to grab Taza's cream to help you with your hands. That time, he kneels in front of you, spreading it from your forearms to the tip of your fingers, so carefully and concentrated, that you can't help but look at him with a goofy smile until it's done.

“Thank you”. You just say.

“Anytime, querida”. He whispers, pulling a tuft of your hair behind your right ear, leaning towards you to kiss your cheek. “What do you want to do now?”

“I think I need twenty minutes more of sleep, but you can go with the guys to the water, if you want”. Shrugging your shoulders, you let your back fall down to the towel.

“I spend too much time with them, and I haven't seen you a single second for the last four days”. He chuckles lying by your side, straining an arm under your neck to put you closer to him. “Let me enjoy at least twenty minutes”.

His resigned sigh makes you laugh almost in silence, while his free hand gets placed on your back, leaving some ephemeral caresses from top to bottom. And you feel as if you were in paradise. You're practically drinking each other's breathings, with closed eyes and your nose touching Bishop's. Your fingers get tangled slightly in the short hair of the mexican, taking pleasure of the peace that it's surrounding you right now.

“I didn't want you to come”. He mutters from nowhere, not opening his eyes, not opening yours. With a calm tone of voice, a little sleepy.

“Why?”

“You were tired, your hands hurt. You need to rest, (Y/N)”.

“I'm resting now. And I couldn't ask for a better way to do it. I think I'm gonna complain about my hands often, so you will take care of me”.

Bishop chuckles drowsy, shaking his head just for a second.

“Anything else, su majestad?” (Your Majesty).

“A kiss”. Murmuring, you get somewhat comfy under his arms.

You're aware of the same desire to kiss you that he feels for you, as you feel, but on the other hand, you weren't expecting him to really do it. His lips gently press yours, before catching them among his. Traveling down one of your hands to the side of his neck, Bishop holds you closer, keeping a low pace of his mouth enjoying the taste and the touch of yours. Unconsciously and by inertia, your left right surrounds his waist. His fingers touring your thigh slowly, makes your first kiss a little better. Biting softly his lower lip, you steal him a heavy sigh, stretching your skin under his huge hand. He wants you closer, and you too. But for the moment, that's pretty enough.

“You should complain about your hands often”. He mumbles almost touching your lips with every syllable.

“I will”.

Sinking your face into his neck, you're trying to fall asleep focused on his breath, hearing a bunch of steps over the sand coming closer. Some whispers talking about you two, thinking that you're sleeping but you're actually trying not to laugh, feeling how Bishop gets a little tense because of the low comments.

“Don't forget I'm your fucking boss”. Bishop growls, freezing everyone's blood. And you can't help but break into laughter.

“Shit”. Coco soughs hiding behind Angel's back, because the oldest Reyes is the tallest of all.

“Nah, c'mon, Bish. Enjoy your d—”.

Before Angel can finish the sentence, the mexican hits his leg, making him fall down over Coco. A lot of cursing in spanish appears under the umbrellas, getting mixed with the loud laughs that make you sit up on your towel almost drowning. Watching them trying to get up only makes it better.

“Oh, man, I wish I could record it”. Gilly's laughs are over the others, with an arm on Creeper's left shoulder. “Damn, prez, repeat it, please…”

“Stop bothering him”. You say holding the angry man between your arms, before lying again on your towels.

“Pendejos mal paridos…” He barks mumbling.

“Don't listen to them”.

“I'm… going to fuck them up as soon as we retur—”.

“Obispo, stop”. You chuckle, leaning up slightly to kiss his cheek.

Finally, you are able to sleep for some minutes, while the guys share some beers playing cards, listening latin music in a low volumen to not continue annoying him. And even if you don't rest for more than twenty or thirty minutes, it's like you have been sleeping for the whole day, because of the comfort you feel under his grip and the caresses in your hair. Opening again your eyes, you raise up your head over his shoulders to find half of the crew on their towels, and the other half playing with a bouncy ball on the shore, just like kids. Taking the advantage that no one is looking, to avoid that they tease you again, you press your lips onto his. Slowly, calmly, with his arms hugging your body tightly as Bishop tucks his tongue in your mouth peacefully looking for yours. You feel some tickles in your stomach when they meet, as he feels more relaxed. El Presidente really is into you. He really has more feelings than he wants to admit, until he knows that you have the same sensation on your chest every time you are close to him. Now, he's seeing it. That maybe you two are having a good opportunity.

And you don't want to stop, drowning a slight gasp against his mouth when it gets a little intense that you expected, forgetting for a second where you are and who is surrounding you. Fucking the especial moment when you hear Coco saying that the hotel rooms are already booked, and that you can ocuppy yours whenever you want. Bishop is about to get up, when you stop him by a hand on his chest. You're going to take care of it this time. Shaking the sand on your body, you wear his sunglasses, walking towards the crew in the water. Coco is looking at you somewhat confused, while the president calls Taza, Tranq and Riz attention to enjoy the show. And before he can say anything else, or ask about what you are going to do seeing how you open, close and repeat the gesture with your right hand, you hit his temple with your palm. And it hurts a little, but the laugh is worth everything.

“Yo! Mami! What was that?!” He complains offended.

“A wave”. You just say, provoking that every laughter of your friends gets louder.

“Mami…” He pouts at you, rubbing that side of his face.

“Do you want a tsunami?”

He doesn't answer, while Leti starts to cough in tears.

“I imagined”. You add then, narrowing your eyes under the aviator sunglasses.

Coming back to the umbrellas, the eldest members clap at you while making them a feigned reverence.

After having a deserved shower in the room you're going to share with Gabriela and Leti, you fall down over the bed waiting for them to get ready for some party time after dinner. And while they choose dresses, more makeup that you have never put on and high heels, you choose some comfy shorts, a white body with bare back and your sneakers. Of course, you're not in that mood after four horrible nights working. Before leaving the hotel, you apply a few more cream on your hands, feeling so much better and using clean bandages to cover them. Meeting the guys at the hall, you go out to find a place to have some dinner, ending up in the same restaurant you have been at noon. The food is pretty good, so you go to the secure one. But this time is a little different since then.

You can't avoid having your right hand on Bishop's nape, caressing his scalp while the table talks about everything and nothing at the same time, laughing and enjoying. Urging you to put your right leg over his left, hanging from it, he caresses your thigh a little assorted as if it was something normal, and natural on him. But it's not, and that makes that gesture more special. You couldn't ask for anything better, until he kisses your cheek without expecting to place his free arm over your shoulders, without caring about if Coco or Angel dares to make another of their occurrences. You two are very sure that you made them understand to not fuck up with Bishop in front of you, even if you find it funny.

Outside of the restaurant, after having a revitalizing dinner, the crew begin to propose different plans. But the mere fact of thinking in a crowded place, with loud music and a mix of smells, makes you yawn inevitably. Leti is killing you with her gaze.

“Yo! Bitch, don' you dare to tell me that you're goen' to sleep”.

“I did—”. Trying to excuse yourself, Bishop interrupts you.

“She doesn't. But I am an old man who needs his eight hours of sleep”.

“Then, good night, mummy”. She's about to take you off from his arms, while he turns around to give her his back.

“I need a nurse to take care of my disabilities”.

“C'mon, Bish! You've been hoarding her the whole day! And I invited her, not you!” She frowns while you laugh. “I hope at least you make her cum…”

“Leticia!” You shout, while Coco palms her nape.

“Mummies don' cum, you dumbass, they just… lie do—”.

“Angel, I swear I am going to break your legs next time”.

“Whatever, Tutankhamun. Enjoy your night”. Your friend rolls her eyes with a heavy sigh.

“We can come back next week, when I have holidays”. You say palming her forehead, making her laugh before leaving back to the hotel.

And you just get separated in it enough time to clean your teeth and grab the charger for your phone, going to his room after that. You're not nervous, but a little excited of having some time alone. Finally. Not to do anything specifically, but to enjoy him being de-stressed. While he's in the bathroom, you take off your clothes to wear the shirt he has left for you on the mattress. Smells like him and that it's driving you insane, crawling over the bed to fall close to the pillows, fighting against your tiredness to not fall asleep this soon.

Having your eyes closed, you feel the side next to yours sinking a little, until his strong arms find your body to wrap it against his chest after turning off the lights. Turning under his grip and intertwining your hands and your legs, Bishop rests his cheek on yours, being able to see part of the pacific ocean from the window in front of your eyes. It's magic. Pure magic.

“Listen…” He mutters getting somewhat comfy, having a deep breath his nose sinked into your neck. “Maybe I can't promise you a life that a normal man could give you, but I'm going to make it worth every second”.

“Bish”.

“Hm…?”

“Do you love me?”.

“Yes, I do, preciosa”.

“That's everything I need”. Turning just a little, you smirk softly at him. “I don't want a normal life. I want to spend it with you”.

“I hope you never regret these words”.

“I only could regret them because they aren't enough to express how I feel when you're close to me. When you touch me. When you pronounce my name”. Replying that, you lie down again under his grip, leaving a soft kiss on his right forearm. “I love you, Bishop. I couldn't regret it”.

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[writterings]

hey im nb/ag and my name is alex but anyway i really want to start T but my family is really, really poor and im guessing my insurance doesn't cover that and im also worried that if i start it I won't like it or something but i want a lower voice and to look less like a girl ffffffff dysphoria is my middle name tbh .,..,., ., .

hey alex, i’m so sorry for answering this late!! i’ve been on mobile literally all day yesterday and today and i felt as though this ask needed a longer answer than i was able to type on my phone. 

anyways! dsyphoria sucks major ass, and if it was a physical thing i would punch it for you. HOWEVER, i do have some advice that could possibly help if you’re interested, and some advice on going on T. 

i’ll put that all below the cut:

T Facts:

first things first, some insurances offer coverage for hormones. i suggest you look into company yours is through and to what extent it goes to (basically just google your insurance company’s name along with “hrt” or something like that, you should find answers pretty quick)

next, T does drastically change your body -- but at a gradual pace. if you see something you don’t like happening, it’ll be pretty easy to quit T and that certain effect should wear off after you stop your use. just be warned, if you do continue T beyond that point, that effect will develop however. 

T can cause cystic acne, hair growth all over your body, and clitoris enlargement (bc a penis is actually an overgrown clit tbh -- but that’s just another story), BUT it can also cause vocal cords thickening for a deeper voice, increased body muscles, and your jaw may become squarer. there are also other side effects -- both good and bad -- and if you’re seriously considering going on T i recommend researching it thoroughly. 

the price of T can range tremendously, especially in regards to what type you get (ex: shots vs pills vs patches). i suggest you research that as well and figure out which form of it would be the best for you considering your family’s situation. 

you typically need a gender therapist/a therapist in general to help get you on T. medical doctors want a note saying yes, indeed, you are trans before they give you any hormones. luck with this many vary. 

****disclaimer: please note i am not on T and have not taken it, i’ve just researched it along with my gender therapist a lot considering i am trying to get on it within the next few months/this school year 

Passing/Kicking Dsyphoria’s Ass/Looking Less Like A Girl:

this part is easier and cheaper than going on T tbh. first things first, you’re going to want to work on your mannerisms. to talk the talk, ya gotta walk the walk pretty much tbh. the things below will help you with the whole “appearing less like a girl” thing:

square your shoulders and stand with them back when you walk. this doesn’t have to be all the time, but it makes you look taller, thinner, and more intimidating. guys tend to walk like this, and it could be good for presenting androgynously for when you’re not exactly presenting as a guy.

when walking, look over people’s heads in the direction you’re going in. they’ll subconsciously get out of your way then. guys tend not to move out of the way for people when they’re about to collide when walking at each other, so this will help

spread your legs when you sit

take up as much space as you want when walking/standing somewhere (without being rude)

don’t look people in the eye as much when you talk to them

shake people’s hands when you meet them. and i mean. all the time. especially if it’s a guy. even if you’ve met them before.

now here’s some fashion advice:

get a binder. a good one. i personally recommend getting a gc2b one, directly off their website and ordering a size above the one you would usually wear in shirts. it WILL make you as relatively flat as you need, but will take some breaking in. their binders are about 30$ so if you need to save up, i seriously recommend investing in them. research the risks of binding, also. 

you don’t need a packer. no one cares that much to check down there.

don’t wear button down shirts unless you’re at a formal event. button down shirts call too much attention to you when you’re someplace casual, and people will stare. because they’re staring at you too long, they’ll stare at the parts they shouldn’t be  and then misgender you as a girl. however, they do think they’re properly gendering you, of course -- cis people pride themselves on figuring out people’s “”””Real”””” genders and then calling them she/he despite how the person is not dressed like a she/he. (and they don’t even consider the person is a “they”)

wear t-shirts instead, and one that’s in your proper size. no baggy Ts. regular, fitting ones are lighter and more form fitting so they make you look more attractive and they call less attention to yourself. don’t worry about your breasts or curves showing if you have them -- if you look androgynous or like a guy enough people won’t question them. (and this is coming from someone with double d breasts who just got called a “he” in walmart despite how i was only wearing a sports bra)

cargo shorts are ugly but literally talk to any guy and he owns like ten pairs. also every butch lesbian friend i have loves them as well. they’re a win if you’re aiming for androgyny/looking more masculine. they also have so many pockets. i recommend cargo shorts. 

wear your pants/shorts below your belly. it’s just a guy thing to do. 

TAKE CARE OF YOUR SHOES!!!! AND GET GOOD ONES!!! you’re agender but i don’t know how much you want to look like a guy, but lemme tell ya guys take GOOD CARE of their shoes. literally, once i started passing as a guy all the dudes at my school starting making fun of my shoes because they were a no-name brand and had holes in them. shoes are important. i can understand if you can’t afford jordans or doc martins (bc i sure as hell cant lol) but just take care of what you got. 

grooming/personal care

don’t shave your legs

let your eyebrows grow out

ditch the bangs. bangs are feminizing. (i recommend a fade away tbh -- they’re pretty androgynous haircuts)

tbh i recommend shaving your pits because they get smelly if you don’t

shave your face. everyone naturally has peach fuzz on their face and teenage boys typically start shaving off whatever they got on them when they reach high school. also, it will start growing in more thicker and faster when you do this, if you want a beard. 

voice

you can actually naturally lower your voice without going on T. 

first, you can try speaking at a lower pitch. this will hurt after you do it for a while so i don’t recommend it too much. 

you can also try vocal exercises to warm up to that. i personally use the “bing-bong-king-kong” method, where i say all those words and go down a pitch on each word, and draw out the syllabels so it’s like “oooooong”

singing along to guy’s part’s in songs and trying to match their pitches actually helps a lot! i hope your a musical fan because trying to do “waving through a window” from dear evan hansen has actually helped me a lot

this link should help you

anyways...that’s all the advice i got! sorry if you weren’t actually looking for advice tho lol. i hope this was able to help in some way. if you ever need someone to talk to, my inbox and DMs are always open. good luck, alex.