#dutchiehcs

[mickmundy]

scout's ma headcanon thread! she was requested by a couple of people and i'm having a burst of inspiration for her so without further ado, let's get to it! i hope you like!

absolutely not your average "housewife"! there's lots of professions i entertain her having (hair/nail salon worker, waitress/bartender, something Generally Unassuming for a woman in the 70s to have as a job)… all intentionally mundane, but serving useful purpose in her life! good for keeping tabs on things around the city, sussing people out and potentially letting spy know any hot goss! these are just day jobs; she gets her thrills elsewhere!

knows everything happening everywhere, anytime. spy learned lots of his intuition-based skills from her! any time spy thinks he knows everything, she always has something in her back pocket that he doesn't! >:)

has a VERY contagious laugh that you can hear miles away. she loves being loud! will clap you really hard on your back or slam her hand on the table when she laughs.

can hold her liquor better than anyone around! doesn't like to get sloppy, but that doesn't mean she doesn't from time to time! loves drinking beer, but will always enjoy a nice glass of wine with her beloved spy! :-) wouldn't/doesn't care if scout is lgbt+ lol. it's absolutely not a big deal to him to come out to her, either. he knows his ma means it when she says she loves him no matter what! she will occasionally hit him with "well ya better bring somebody home to meet me sometime!" (loud laughter)

i think she'd be more financially well-off than her home leads one to believe; she's good at stashing and moving around spy's cash! her apartment is humble but she always looks immaculate. doesn't let scout know how much money she really has. very financially savvy and an incredible negotiator… even if it means getting a little ugly! used car salesman tremble in her presence!

fights like a scorned gambler who's owed a debt. won't let you know she can fight, though! likes it when people think she's just some dainty dame.

is a material girl, but knows what really matters. fell in love with spy before he was The Spy he is today and values loyalty and trust/honesty above all else. some might think that's ironic considering her partner of choice, but she'll be quick to quip back with a snide/cheeky "of course that's what you think! you only know the mask!"

breaking balls is her love language. she'll tease you, but never maliciously. this is also scout's, and one of spy's, languages of love too.

always trying to feed you. "put some more meat on your bones! it's good for ya!" (pops gum and winks at you) while i think she no doubt is well-versed in the lifestyle that spy leads, she's not Directly "in-it" like spy is. not an agent of any kind herself, but gives spy a hand when she can. knows how to shoot a gun and wield a kitchen knife!

grew up dirt poor and has "a champagne taste on a beer budget". high standards, takes no guff, won't hesitate to put you in your place. this (and many other reasons) is why spy loves her :-)

very charismatic, knows how to lie, but also how to be sincere. is genuinely a good mother to her boys, who love her in return. they're all protective of her even though they know they don't have to be; she has no problem sticking up for herself!

spy was not her first husband, but he's her favorite! she loves him very much, and he loves her. they aren't exes, they're happily together, and have an open relationship.

she knows all of the mercs (some better than others ofc!) and won't hesitate to talk their ears off when she visits the base, armed with embarrassing photos and stories about spy and scout that make them both groan and the mercs holler with laughter!

she picks out spy's suits for/with him. she's the only one spy would ever trust to dress him other than himself! they always look great together and accessorize around each other.

she does not tell scout about who his father is. not because she doesn't want to, but she knows the nature of spy's job and knows "the business" from being around him for all this time; it's the best thing to keep scout and herself (also spy!) safe. i think scout would be angry at first, but once it's explained to him, he'd understand. ma knows best!

spy taught her how to walk in heels and does things like painting her nails for her all the time. he always makes sure she has enough money for a well-deserved spa day, but if she knows he's coming to town, she'll let her nails get a little busted up so spy can paint them for her!

she loves to look at spy and sigh a fond "ugh, i could just kill you!" while smirking/bating her eyes at him after/as he showers her with gifts and other wonderful things… to which spy chuckles and hums lovingly and replies with "mhmhmm, ma petite chou fleur, if anyone could, it would be you. <3" and they give each other the most Loving Look.. :')

she's younger than spy but not by much. they met while she was a waitress in a diner in boston while spy was on a mission to assassinate a target in the city early in his career (when his suits were still cheap.. <3). he hides in the diner after a particularly fiery shootout and his pursuers come into the place. she recognizes him as the Quiet Gentleman who has been coming in for coffee in the mornings to enjoy with a cigarette. covers for him and spy never forgets her kindness and quick wit. he comes back after the mission ends and, with his payout from the job, treats her to a romantic night and promises to see her again. no matter how far away spy goes, he always returns to her! she has more faith in him than he deserves (so he says), to which she smirks and straightens his (now expensive <3) suit tie and places a kiss on his balaclava's cheek and says "we both know i only deserve the best." and winks at him and he smiles at her and hums in agreement.. kisses her hand… siigh.. this is a massively condensed "origin story" for them lol but! AH I LOVE THEM

AHH I HAVE SO MANY MORE THOUGHTS BUT FOR NOW.... i will leave with all of this... HEHE TYSM for reading! ^__^ i hope you enjoy ehe!!

[mickmundy]

closing out this #bushmedbday with a few of my favorite little details from the comic that started it all... HEHE! i really love the cover art. like its SO good... sniper's class patch with the frayed threads, evidence of archimedes' mischief with his bloody footprints... ahh!!

sniper and archimedes being lil blood brothers.. i mention this in my fics quite a bit, but i think it's interesting that sniper is the only one that medic has ever used his best friend's blood on! thanks for your help with the revival, archimedes!

i have Lots Of Thoughts about snipers other scars that medic graced him with, too! aside from the Obvious Reason that scars are sexy and sniper looks good with them, here are some of my thoughts on what they could be from! ^v^ i love being a little unconventional with this stuff!

sniper's strength after being freshly-revived was also really impressive... able to push/pull/hoist up medic (who is, as we know, quite burly! hehe!) with just one hand...? you're a miracle worker, doc!

sniper doesn't steal the dying spotlight for too long! he and medic actually share a very similar fate! classic team sure does love shooting Two Bullets into people, don't they?! hoo!

ive also made note in the past of some comparisons (and contrasts!) in their respective death scenes in the comics, too... imo sniper and medic have Vastly different beliefs when it comes to death (respecting vs defying it, etc), too! very fun and makes for Delicious Chemistry!

going to close this lil thread with one of my favorite things... he's medic's Crowning Medical Achievement! ;u; sniper's revival really was a total labor of love... and classic team's money! doctor ludwig, you've really outdone yourself! who can blame him for bragging!

i just want to say thank you SO much to everyone who participated, retweeted, commented and just shared the love for this ship today! ;u; it's a pairing that means so much to me and i'm so happy to have found such a wonderful, supportive community! ;; ILYASM!!! BUSHMED 5 EVA!!

[mickmundy]

another merc hc thread request from twitter! pyro seems like an appropriate addition since we've been stuck in our apartment without ac during a lethal heatwave. as of today for the first time, we officially have ac! let's cool off with some pyro headcanons! i hope you enjoy my dear friend!

honestly pyro is one I've held off on for a long time because i really think they're at their best when a great deal of their character is left completely ambiguous. pyro is the Beloved Mystery of the group (spy thinks it's him. Ha!), some things are better left unknown!

that said, i don't ponder what's "under the mask". the mask is an equally important part of who pyro is, too! i know it's common to dwell on what's going on under that iconic uniform, but i personally don't! are they an eldritch terror? are they just Some Person? who knows!

imo the mercs do not ponder this either. pyro is their friend and some things are just simply not their business! they might have a passing curiosity sometimes, but all in all, nobody is seeking to try and "figure them out"! they like pyro just the way they are, no matter what that way may be!

very creative, super visual! loves to draw and paint… they won't hesitate to get their gloves wet! loves gardening or anything that keeps their hands busy. LOOOOVES junk journaling. what can they say, there's lot of junk around the base!

this applies to my personal Team Fortress Law in general but also heavily to pyro so i'll stick it in with their headcanons: the love of the bit. and of nonsensical "toon" physics. a lot of fun things about the tf2niverse is that they don't demand explanation! "pyro, you could do that the whole time?!" No, not ANY time! only when it serves some higher comedic or ironic purpose!

i think pyro is mute (selectively or otherwise) and prefers to sign. she'll also grunt/make other expletive sounds, but her preferred method of communication is signing! or drawing out what she wants to communicate. no matter what she chooses, the mercs are great interpreters!

loves to learn. can almost always be seen peering over one of the other mercs' shoulders when they're doing… just about anything! it happens so often that even the most personal-space-valuing mercs have gotten used to pyro's love of observation!

not a child, or child-like. enjoys whimsy and toys and also maiming. just because he has some unconventional interests doesn't mean he's any less of a Grown Adult Merc than the rest of them!

loves to bake and is really good at it! pyro enjoys burning stuff, but even pyro knows that everything has it's perfect Burnt (ie:correctly cooked) Temperature! the mercs love his sweet treats!

i think the other mercs play up their fear of pyro to outsiders as an inside joke. like the meet the team videos where they're all scared of them was done to scare the shit out of the director LOL. like pyro has no idea that's what they're doing and spy will come behind the director and be like "look at the bloodlust within the wretched beast's eyes…" and pyro will see spy and stand up and wave like ^_^! and spy will wink and wave back when the director can't see him do so SKDFS

the best listener out of all of the mercs. pyro loves to listen! about anything! not likely to give sagely advice (best to go to heavy, engie or spy for that!), but if you just want someone to lean on and listen, pyro's your pal (and best secret-keeper)!

there's a lot of speculation about pyroland but again it's not something i dwell on. i entertain the idea of pyroland being symbolic of pyro quitting the job they hated. life's a fantasyland every day when you're doing what you love with who you love!

is a great driver and one of the most financially responsible mercs! extremely wealthy (nobody knows this) and lives humbly. always a big tipper, loves giving gifts to the mercs (handmade or otherwise)!

the eye goggles on pyro's mask are expressive! if she "raises a brow", her goggles move to make the expression!

doesn't hate water, just gets in it in their suit! loves to swim and blow bubbles underwater in their mask. don't leave them in charge of the thermostat though… what's A Little Warm to pyro might be 'your skin is melting off' to another! as for when they were frowning in the sub, i always figured that was because he can't play with fire in a submarine, lest the whole thing explode!

very gentle. great with medic's birds and all of the critters sniper catches (claps their hands repeatedly when sniper catches a new one!), takes very good care of them! loves reptiles specifically because they like warm climates and can be pretty hard to kill, just like pyro!

nobody ever sees pyro eat, but he Does eat! they'll all sit down to eat and there will be bite marks in the food and it will slowly disappear... but not when anyone can see it do so! again, nobody questions this or tries to "catch" pyro in the act. that's just another Pyroism!

really loves learning other languages (pyro has a language of their own of course!) and hanging around spy and heavy. they like their mellow vibe and enjoy "parallel playing" with them while they discuss literature. the mercs also say that pyro has a knack for impressions!

[mickmundy]

demoman headcanon thread! a kind anon on twitter asked if i had any thoughts on him, and since he is one of my favorite mercs... i definitely do! :-) i hope you enjoy! <3

demo is one of the most selfless of the mercs! he's smart, capable and just because he has a great sense of humor doesn't mean he's stupid! he's just as fun to party with as he is to make bombs with... either way, the chemistry is explosive!

speaking of weird science, i don't think there can be any science party without demo! he'd undoubtedly have SO much in common with medic and engineer, and would converse with them often about what they're all working on!

tavish is a great one to have around, no matter who you ask. he adjusts himself around who he's hanging out with: a rowdy night out with scout and solly? he's in! a quiet night around a campfire with engineer and sniper? of course!

quick to forgive. gah, there are other things to worry about in life! water under the bridge and so on! just don't make it a habit, lad! he's a generous spirit and isn't above settling things with a good talk... or a fight! ha!

absolutely a great listener. is able to give you honest advice, or crack a joke to lighten the mood and make you laugh! that said, he loves making people laugh. i think he likes it best when everyone's having a good time! always has a quip or a fun anecdote or story to share with people!

workaholic! but that can be said for a lot of the mercs. takes a lot of pride in what he does and takes his job very seriously! don't let his good sense of humor fool you into thinking he's unprofessional!

prefers to be the one helping, not the one needing help! i think he'd be quick to divert attention away from himself if the conversation got Too personal for him. is Reluctant to accept help, but not unwilling, and will always be grateful!

when he's comforting someone, he always seems to know the perfect balance of humor, a gentle touch, and good advice. you might have a good cry with him, but he'll make sure you leave with a laugh!

big on family/loyalty. values the team's lives as his own and will do anything he can to make himself useful! i think he and sniper became their closest after his parents died; demo checked in on him often once they returned back to the base, and sniper never forgot his kindness.

i think he loves literature! i have a running headcanon that spy, heavy, engineer and demo all meet up for a book club meeting every so often! ^_^ enjoys fiction and nonfiction pretty equally, but knows a great deal about mythology of all kinds!!

puts a lot on himself. wants to make his family proud, do right by his mom and make sure everyone is taken care of. very sensitive to the needs of those around him! he's a big softie!

i also love to think about him playing piano... him and spy love playing classical tunes together, or if he's hanging around medic, they'd absolutely make some ruckus with dueling pianos!! HEH

briefly mentioned above, but is a very talented chemist. frequently consults with sniper (natural remedies) and medic (clinical killing tips) and engineer (manmade remedies and killing tips). knows a decent amount about respawn technology and engineer's sentry technology too!

is very touchy-feely. will always greet you with a clap on the back or a tousle of the hair or a smack upside the back of your head (if you're scout!) and a jolly laugh! very warm, rough hands... he knows when to give a tender pat or a loving whack!

loves tropical birds! teaches his macaw how to talk and swear at the mercs!! calls archimedes 'archie' (to which medic gives a Frown. he names his birds with intention!)... even though ol' archie enjoys his company very much! :-)

isn't a great driver, but can sail a boat blindfolded with his hands tied behind his back (according to him)! he can drive the mercs home from a long night at the bar without a problem, but on long road trips he prefers if someone else takes the wheel... preferably sniper!

has very low spice tolerance. the other mercs have been trying to build him up over time with some decent success though! but all in all he'll always prefer the flavor of his own traditional dishes!

the other mercs have fun pranking him with really spicy foods. once he puts out the fire in his mouth, he thinks it's pretty funny and gives them credit for being able to trick him!

talks with his hands and often slams them down on the table (or his own thighs) when talking! very animated, always a joy to listen to whether he's yelling at you or laughing with you!

very social, but can also enjoy some alone time now and then. greasy food, a comfortable chair and his comfy pants are great company sometimes... with a bottle of his favorite scrumpy of course! even if he prefers to share his "quiet time" with someone else, too!

often converses with sniper and engineer about parental hangups and living up to what their families raised them to be like. they take it hard, but he loves his family, even if being a demoman isn't always easy!

demo's a liquor connoisseur, but not just for the taste! it's all about chemistry! he can taste a drink and be able to break down its composition down to the real nitty gritty... and recite it to you if you ask!

can always tell when spy cooks with wine, and exactly what type and how much! sometimes spy tries to throw him off, but tavish's instinct is never wrong! can taste something and break down the exact makeup of it, which spy and heavy appreciate when they cook!

[mickmundy]

hiii, i really love your interpretation of spy and i love hearing you talk about him. he's sooo mischaracterized most of the time that it really hinders my enjoyment of fan material. I would live to hear you talk more about him (or spoovy hehe)

EEE SHRIEKS THANK YOU SO MUCH MY FRIEDN ;u; that means the world to me!! i'm always happy to hear that people like my thoughts on the mercs!! ;;; and i completely get that, i do the same with characters i love for that very reason! :/ buuut that's why i gotta make what i wanna see, heheehe!! >:)c i'm so happy you enjoy my characterization, i'm so honored!! ;;; <3333 i am also SO sorry that i've kept you waiting for so long, but i am so happy to finally be able to take time and answer!! :-)

i've covered a lot of bases with spy in terms of what i've posted about him kind of superficially, so perhaps i'll delve into things a little more specifically! i hope this is okay! ;o; <3333 some big headcanon chunks and some spoovy >:3 HEHEHE!

i often think about how spy operates in terms of how he expresses generosity... while he's obviously very guilty of bombarding his loved ones with gifts, food, whatever their heart could possibly desire (even if heavy insists that spy doesn't need to do any of that for him!), i think that's reserved solely for his romantic partner(s)... like heavy and scout's mom! >:3c hehe... as for anyone else, i think he prefers to control how his kindness is perceived (and if it's perceived at all!)...

i've mentioned before but little things liiiike:

taking pyro's sweets out of the oven before they burn

replacing engineer's wrench that he swore he'd lost forever (spy found it and put it in the right place on engie's tool wall)...

making sure scout always has a cold can of bonk in the fridge

and so on!

and he never wants any of them to know that those random acts of kindness come from him! he also sometimes takes it upon himself to "gently interfere" (despite his insistence that he hates doing that or refuses to do that!) in some of the affairs of his friends... a personal favorite of mine goes like this:

spy knows sniper has a hard time expressing his emotions or being vulnerable and gets kinda stubborn about it

spy "lets it slip" to medic in passing that sniper sleeps with a stuffed animal

sniper gets embarrassed and is like "SPY!!!! >:/"

medic gives sniper puppy dog eyes and is like "oh, hoo! can i please see him! ;o;" and sniper's like ";-;... really... well.. alright..." and shows him and they have a lovely night together in his van of sniper telling medic about his childhood or some kind of anecdote and getting Vulnerable and medic pulls a little suture kit out of his pocket and is like "he certainly looks well-loved... perhaps i could sew some of these (misc rips and tears and Worn Down Spots) up for him? hmm?" and sniper's like ";_; you'd do that.?.." (sniper can sew but he just never got around to repairing his lil friend) and medic is like "certainly! uUu you needn't worry, he'll be in good hands." and winks and sniper takes medic's hands in his own and kisses them and murmurs "the best.. <3" against them and then watches medic "operate"... hehehe... to which he of course does a perfect job and its very cute/intimate/romantic for both of them!

next day sniper and spy are taking a smoke break together and spy's like "... well, how did it go?" and sniper's like "how did what go- OAO WAIT..." and spy smirks and blows smoke away from their faces and hums and is like "i see. a success, then? i hope you had a good night." and sniper's like ">//M//<... yeah... we did... thanks, spy..."

like spy will sometimes just take it upon himself to push some relationships forward or do little things that he knows will improve the lives of those around him but asks for no credit in doing so... and this is where i think heavy would start to really notice him in a romantic kind of way.. he admires that spy can be flamboyantly generous but that his real bread and butter is being Anonymously (or, in a Roundabout Way) Kind... i think that kind of thing would go a long way with heavy and he'd respect it... actions speaking louder than being able to Brag that you did them and so on..

heavy confronts spy about it one time.. they're in the kitchen together and heavy sees a cloaked spy loading a few bonk cans (they're floating into the fridge from the pack scout left on the counter) and heavy grins and is like "excuse me, impressively floating cans. i would like to make a sandwich." and takes out everything he needs and moves aside so that spy can continue and has his back to spy and he can hear spy finish and close the fridge and go to dart out of the room but heavy's like "scout will be happy for cold drink. he is lucky you are watching out for him." and of course everyone (including heavy and spy) know spy is no dad of the year and that historically spy doesn't have a great track record of watching out for scout but he's trying now... and that's what heavy's acknowledging.. and spy doesn't say anything and slips out and spends the next like 2 weeks thinking about heavy and what he said, wondering if heavy will say anything to anyone or expose him.. but he doesn't. he figures spy has his reasons and respects them.

then heavy decides to go and make another sandwich a few weeks after and sits down at one of the mess hall tables first and puts his book down, starts making tea first, preparing the kettle.. and he goes to make his sandwich and he sees the ingredients floating out of the fridge and slowly making themselves into a sandwich, just the way he likes it... perfect ratio of sauces and toppings, olive meticulously skewered with a toothpick on each piece... cut neatly into four little triangles, instead of his usual two. just enough of a difference for it to be Clearly From Spy (as if it was any mystery). spy then places a glass of wine that compliments the flavors of the sandwich (spy's personal recommendation of course) beside it on the table..

heavy smiles warmly and the kettle is whistling and heavy doesn't even notice as he takes a bite of one of the sandwich pieces and he swears it tastes better since spy made it.. takes a sip of the wine and it's perfect... an absolute delight.. and he's not even typically a wine drinker but oh my gosh. and the kettle is still whistling and heavy finally notices and is like oh! and looks over and sees, through the steam, a red suited sleeve (the rest of his body is still cloaked) take it off of the stove and heavy smiles lovingly and is like "thank you, spy." and keeps eating and taking his time, savoring it... and spy's still cloaked but he feels spy brush the tips of his fingers over his broad back and hears a gentle "de rien." before the door opens and closes.. and now it makes heavy think of spy... that gentle touch with those poised and graceful fingers... how he typically hated being touched on the back, but how he loved how spy had done it just then... HEHEHE...

[mickmundy]

bushmedicine. to me

ADFKASDFASDF REALLLLL YOU ARE SO RIGHT!! absolutely.... i think sniper can be a total chatterbox once you get him to open up, but getting him out of his shell would be a bit of an undertaking, even with a few drinks in him! i think he'd also default to talking about his job when he Does loosen up that people think it's the Only thing he's passionate about, which is so not true! his hobbies might be a little bit more "morbid" than the average person's, but i think someone....... like medic............ hehee....................... would actually be Elated to hear about his love for taxidermy (and its Entire Process!), big game hunting, and so on! i've said this before but i think medic would absolutely be hanging all over sniper and Giddily Giggling for him to "tell it again, tell it again!" about how he's slept in animal corpses before! and sniper snickering and being like "well alright, one more time,,, <3" and puts his arm over the back of the booth/chair/bench/whatever they're sitting in and watching medic watch him Intently... letting medic interrupt him every five seconds to ask questions he's already answered, but doesn't mind answering again! EHEEE..

GOD I GOT SO SIDETRACKED FORGIVE ME ;__; BUT YEAS YOU ARE SOOOO RIGHT HUEUHEU..... thank you so much for sending me this, i'm so sorry it's taken me so long to reply!! ;__; i can't seem to figure out how to log into my acct on desktop (i get a "try again later" every time i try. lol) and my phone literally Cannot run the app sl;kdf... i had to type this on my computer and paste it from my phone! BUT WUAAAA ILYYY I LOVE THIIIS ;___; TTHANK YOU SO MUCH MY FRIEND i hope you're having a happy new year!! ^_^ <333

[mickmundy]

setting camp in your inbox to listen to any rambles you have for bushmedicine bc oh my fucking god its rotting my brain

just imagining them doing some foraging in a forest and medic is silently celebrating and (not so silently) pinning as sniper goes off about different plants and being oblivious to how genuinely infatuated and invested medic is until he looks up and makes eye contact

OMG YES PLEASE SET UP CAMP IN MY INBOX I LOVE GETTING MESSAGES ;__; especially about bushmed.!!!!!!.. Smirks

AND EEE YESSSSS!!! YESS ABSOLUTELY... i think medic would also be really knowledgeable about different plants and animals (if they were dangerous! because he loves Lethal Things! hoo!), but nobody is as knowledgeable as his sniper... :-) i can absolutely see him trying to coax some fun facts out of him, get him out of his shell... i think even when they're established sometimes sniper still smothers himself a bit in terms of how talkative he is about certain things... but that's okay! that's what medic is here for! >:)

medic draws it out of him by asking questions like "oh! and what family is [plant], from, again? i believe it's slipped my mind!" it hasn't, but sniper doesn't need to know that! sniper clears his throat and is like "well," and goes into it and now and then medic will Gently Interject and be like "ah! and, if one wants to harvest, say, deadly poison from [deadly poisonous thing], how might one go about that, hmm?" and sniper turns to look at him and smiles crookedly and is like "hypothetically?" and medic grins toothily (he absolutely does Not mean hypothetically!) and is like "of course." and sniper hums (he knows this) and is like "well, i suppose maybe you'd need someone'a help you. s'a two-person job." <- he's flirting

medic would rock on his heels and giggle because he Knows sniper is flirting and he's like "oh? i don't suppose you'd know anyone who would be so helpful." and sniper's lil corner-of-his-mouth grin grows and he's like "i might."

medic's like "mmn... well, i'd certainly hope he's capable. deft with his hands, quick to react..." and he kind of slows his walking so that he can stand adjacently-behind sniper to check him out, let his eyes wander from the tip of his hat down to the heels of his boots and back up again to where he knows sniper's waiting to make eye contact...

sniper chuckles, "sure, yeah. all that," and sniper's like "well i hope he'd tell you that [adjacent fact about other plant species in the area] and medic perks up and is like "oh?! i didn't know that!" and sniper grins and is like "c'mere," and leads him to the plant in question and kneels down and (he's wearing gloves) trims and plucks some of the poisonous plant and is like "this little beauty could [paralyze, poison, etc] with just a little bit. if y'bred it with [Another lethal plant], well, suppose the possibilities would be endless for the kind of genetic cocktails you could make." and medic Should be letting out an excited sound but he was kind of only half-listening because he was focusing on sniper's mouth, the way his eyes look from this angle behind his glasses... how gently he's touching something so dangerous.. his respect for nature and life around them and how he gets so swept up in talking about it and enjoys it so much...

and sniper kinda snaps out of it because he's not hearing medic's Delighted Noises that he always makes when sniper talks about this kind of stuff and turns to face medic and is like "pidge, did y'hear-" and medic is never shy about letting sniper see him check him out, but medic looks so Taken by him that it makes sniper's neck heat up... those uneven flushes of red start blooming on his face (poppies! glorious poppies!) and medic's smile grows and is like "i did... you know how i get distracted," and medic Does get distracted (he can be very scatterbrained!) but they both know this wasn't one of those scatterbrained times.. no.. medic was very focused on the subject of his affection...!

sniper clears his throat and is like "heh.... right..." and they look at each other and even when they're an established couple sometimes the way medic looks at sniper just knocks the wind out of him... all of the fascinating gorgeous things around them that both he and medic adore, and medic's attention still wants to be on him... medic gives him a tender smile and is like "go on, please." and sniper kinda wheezes because medic's gaze is So Intense and he can't think about anything other than medic medic medic medic medic-

*piano falls on my head*

AS:DFLAKSD:FLASKDF I GOT SIDETRACKED FORGIVE ME., ;__; BUT I LOVE THIS IDEA SOO MUCH YOU ARE SO RIGHT YOUR BRAIN IS SUPERMASSIVE.., GRAAAHHH ;;;

and you are welcome in my inbox ANY TIME (and so is everyone else! ^v^) my friend, i always love talking about bushmed and getting asks is a really fun way to do that! ^u^ <3333 I HOPE YOU HAVE A LOVELY WEEK!!!

[mickmundy]

I got some BushMed questions for ya, if you're interested in answering with your headcannons.

1. Who was interested in who, first?

2. What's their favorite way to show affection for one another?

3. What's a hobby or pastime that the other absolutely refuses to partake in?

4. When they're falling asleep together, what do they wear?

5. How does each one celebrate the other's birthday?

No pressure on responding, thanks for considering!

OMG OF COURSE!! ^__^ <333 HIII MY FRIEND i am absolutley always down to talk bushmedicine!! HEHE...

1. Who was interested in who, first? okay so this one is actually kind of a tricky answer for me because i think both of them were Mutually interested at around the same time, but it kind of snuck up on them both! in the past i think they'd both be like "oh yeah i'd smash if given the chance"/appreciated each other Aesthetically the whole time, but in terms of like. Romantic Interest...? i think it's hard to say! >w> in my fics i keep it ambiguous because i like to think about them falling in love catching them both by surprise! both of them are fine feeling crushes or sexual feelings but when it comes to facing "genuine romantic feelings" or acknowledging that they're seeking partnership... well... that's a big deal for both of them!!

2. What's their favorite way to show affection for one another? OHHH fun one!! i think both of them are really handsy! medic loooves fawning over sniper in public and in private, and while sniper's a little more discreet in public, he'll eagerly hook his finger in one of the beltloops on medic's trousers or satchels and pull him into his lap, or medic will slip his hand into the back pocket of sniper's jeans! hehe.. sniper is very observant too, so he'll always take note of certain things medic likes and surprises him with his favorite snack or food, or he'll be like "have you drank any water today? >_>" and medic will be like "<w< have you?" and they playfully narrow their eyes at each other and medic's like "i'll have some if you have some!" and sniper snorts and is like "fine..." and they pause from their work and enjoy a little snack and some water together... neither of them are great at having super healthy eating habits but they're quick to remind each other and then that solves the problem... hehe... <3

i think they're also good at like. Anticipating when the other needs help even if they don't ask for it... lovingly fishing each other out of their towers or labs at the end of a long day... carrying each other back to sniper's van or medic's room and Gently Asserting that they need rest, it's time to go to bed... and the Exhausted One of them will cling to the other and concede... hehe.. <3

more under the cut!

3. What's a hobby or pastime that the other absolutely refuses to partake in? AKSDFAKDFAKSKDF THIS IS SOOOOO FUNNY OMFGGGG hmm. that's really hard to say because both of them love getting gross and getting their hands dirty! if you feel like being humorous/ironic, i think medic would be like HOO! NO THANK YOU! to sniper wrestling crocs (he loves to watch though... >w> hee hee!), and then sniper would be like ".... i'll pass, thanks!" about injecting wild animals with other wild animals genes or things like that.. and both of them look at each other and are like "what! it's not THAT big of a deal! >_<" (<- both are Very Zany/High Risk Hobbies) ASDFKASDKF

4. When they're falling asleep together, what do they wear? i am a staunch believer that sniper sleeps naked... so nothing! hehe... medic i think sleeps in underwear and a tank top, or if they've just had sex (or just want to be as Physically Close As Possible), he'll fall asleep naked too! sniper runs hot and medic runs a bit colder, so they even each other out temperature wise... sniper doesn't like things clinging to him in his sleep so he hates wearing pajamas. the only thing that he wants clinging to him in his sleep is medic! >:) medic likes sleeping on his back, so sniper likes to rest his face on medic's chest and always Instantly drifts off.. he's a big drooler too! but medic thinks that's sooo cute... hehe...

5. How does each one celebrate the other's birthday? OMG... this is so cute... well i think sniper isn't a huge fan of like. "big celebrations", and he doesn't like being the center of attention! but medic wants to make a big deal out of how glad he is that sniper's alive and here with him, but how does one do that without making a big grand spectacle? :( hmm...! i wrote a one-shot about it but i think medic surprisingly gets really in his own head about gift-giving and showing others he loves them. he has a lot of love for sniper, but how can he show it in a way that makes that clear?! aggh!! hoo, what a predicament! thankfully for him, he does a wonderful job! a simple, quiet celebration, just the two of them in sniper's van, or taking him to a secluded spot for some fishing or other activity he knows sniper loves... and medic loves celebrating like this too... this just means he gets sniper all to himself!! >:) and then they meet up with the other mercs later that night for some drinks and games at the bar! but medic makes Sure nobody puts sniper on the spot... hehehe!

sniper on the other hand is actually (surprisingly?) really good at gauging/planning celebrations and gift-giving! very thoughtful, observant... knows what medic wants without medic even having to ask for it! medic likes big parties so sniper plans him one and invites the other mercs and it's a huge success! sniper watching with a loving smile on his face as medic celebrates with his friends and keeps mostly to the background, making sure things go off without a hitch! sniper's cutting the cake and everyone's ready to toast and the mercs are like SPEECH SPEECH SPEECH!!! and medic Of Course never hesitates to be the center of attention and is like "HEE HEE i wanted to thank everyone for such a lovely birthday! but, most importantly, i'd like to thank my wonderful handsome krokodil delightful thoughtful spatzchen for such a grand celebration!! ^v^"

and all of the mercs Smile Knowingly and Turn Their Full Attention to sniper (trying to embarrass him) who is keeping his eyes trained on the knife as he's cutting pieces of the cake SO methodically and his face is SO red and medic scoops sniper up and is like "ohhh, my heart, you make me feel celebrated ALL YEAR AROUND!!" and gives him a biiiiig SMMMWAK on the lips and sniper's like Heart Eyes... smiles Dumbly and giggles and is like "eheh.,., 'course. love you, dovey." and the mercs are like AGUAGUAAEHEHEE (teasing sniper and praising both of them) and while the mercs talk amongst themselves and eat... medic pulls sniper into his lap and they share a slice of cake and medic gives sniper a soft kiss on the lips and is like Lovingly like "thank you <3" because he knows this must have been really hard for sniper to do! and sniper grins and licks his lips (they taste like frosting and medic hehe) and is like "no worries, plover-darling <3" and medic gives him a big cheeky smile and giggles and gives sniper a Big Squeeze!

AAGUHGAAAAA THANK YOUUUUU ;__; THESE WERE LITERALLY SOOO FUN TO ANSWER ^u^ HHHUHU!!!

[mickmundy]

waaa im glad you dont mind me camping here :]]

i still think about that one scene from your fic where sniper is all snarky and commanding when fighting blue spy and medic is just like "i am experiencing 😳😳 So Many Emotions But Also One Major One™️"

Sniper being snarky is *chef's kiss*

NOT AT ALL MY FRIEND HAVE A SEAT GET COMFY!!! HEHEE… and… oh.., you mean.,., this..,.,? >:)c

The bushman laughed, hoarse and cocky, as though he’d already won the fight despite being on the ground. Medic grasped the edges of the razorback tightly; he could smell Sniper’s aftershave and sweat on it, which wasn’t doing much in quelling his excitement over watching him fight to protect him. And himself, of course. But Medic supposed it wasn’t illegal to think about Sniper fighting so feverishly because he was up here too.

It wasn’t often that he got any kind of real protection on the battlefield, after all, except for when he was with Heavy. Someone like Sniper, who weakened with proximity (or so he’d previously been told) fighting to defend him like this, losing so much blood for him… it was… cathartic. Romantic.

HEHE… i say this all the time on my twt but not so often here.,., but i really feel like i’m totally wretched at writing fight scenes, so the fact that people love them so much is a HUGE relief to me!! ;_; they’re my greatest insecurity when i write, which is ironic considering.. you know.. tf2 is a game in which literally nothing BUT combat takes place… and yet so much of my series takes place Off of the battlefield! AND SOOO TRUE i love writing him cocky, and i think he absolutely would be when he’s in his element in battle! that’s where his confidence would really and truly shine! :-)

i think medic would absolutely get hot under the collar watching sniper work… he’d love seeing the change in sniper’s demeanor from off the field to on, and it would absolutely turn him on to see sniper so Assured and Confident! sniper IS a great hunter, after all! >:) HEHHE… yes yes i know in game he can’t be good in close quarters AND long range but thank god this isn’t the game… and Realistically if he wrestles crocodiles for fun he would have to be quick on his feet and have quite a bit of strength! but i don’t think he likes “tossing it around”, if you know what i mean. he doesn’t mind if people don’t pick up on how strong he is. it’s good to be a little mysterious! ;-)

THANK YOU SO MUCH MY FRIEND AAHGGG IM SO HAPPY YOU LOVE MY FICS ;__; ILYYYY YOU ARE WELCOME IN MY INBOX ANY TIME GWAHHHHH ;;;;;

[mickmundy]

Hi!! Can I get 3, 14 and 38?

Thanks!!!

EEEEE OMG IM SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO ANSWER THESE MY FRIEND ;__; I HOPE THEYRE THE RIGHT ONES!! ;^; <333

3. How do they put themselves to bed each night (reading, singing, thinking, etc)?

Sniper has a pretty consistent routine (because he Thrives on routine)! Feed/play with hoots if he's not too tired to unwind, sit outside and have a beer or two (not every night; sometimes this is alternated with a smoke or just a snack of some kind)... goes into his van for the night and brushes his teeth, takes off his clothes, makes sure he has everything he needs for tomorrow (battle, errands, whatever) and crawls into bed... does some reading via a battery-powered camping lantern until he feels nice and drowsy... curls up with his childhood stuffed animal (that he'd deny having if you asked him!) and falls asleep...

Medic... doesn't put himself to bed! he's up all hours of the day and night and abides by no such schedule! when he and sniper start dating, that's the most sleep he's probably ever gotten in his life! if he doesn't pass out from exhaustion, it's likely he's still puttering around in the lab or his room, indulging in hobbies or freaky science! sniper often has to come and fish him out of his lab, but if medic wants to spend time with sniper, he'll ditch his dens of comfort in favor of sniper's... and sleep tightly with sniper curled around him!

14. What animal do they fear the most?

Sniper fears no man or beast! but he knows his way around self-defense when it comes to duking it out with animals, and is confident in his ability to keep himself safe from just about anything! of course there are definitely things he'd prefer to avoid tangling with, but all in all, he's not really afraid of anything in nature! he'd rather skinnydip with a man-o-war than have an emotionally-intimate conversation, though!

Medic also has no fear, but not because he has the hunting skills that sniper does, but because he's simply too curious and excited to be in the presence of terrifying animals to even be afraid in the first place! he's sticking his head into the open mouths of crocodiles or tossing food to bears and giggling and going hoo! oh my! look at this! and sniper has to hastily scoop him up out of the way and medic's like "hoo! ^v^ are you scared, spatzchen? (<- sniper's scared For Him, not of the beast!)" and sniper huffs and lets out a relieved sigh that medic's okay... HEHE

38. What memory do they revisit most often?

Sniper actively tries not to revisit any memories LOL. i think he definitely has fond ones but for him, fondness can quickly become bittersweet... to perhaps a bit sad... he prefers to keep himself in the present and think about what's to come!

Medic has absolutely no care for his past! he's similar to sniper in that way, but unlike sniper, he also doesn't think too far ahead either; living in the moment is what ludwig does best! he loves improvising, thinking on his feet and constantly mentally stimulating himself, so why worry about the future when the present is so much more fun?! hoo!

[mickmundy]

medic Enthusiastically talking about how he brought sniper back to life (and how sniper is his greatest achievement) and wasted 1.3 billion dollars of classic team's resources and money to do it

[mickmundy]

medic will text sniper a long message that's like "Good morning my darling!" and detail his entire day, how he's feeling, what he had for breakfast etc and end it with "i love you!" and sniper will reply "lysm. cant wait to see yuo." Both will have the Exact same amount of Feeling...

medic will stop open heart surgery to be like "aha! sniper texted me! hold this for just a minute, [hands mercenary on table Operating Tool]" and goes to text him back and will send him pictures of birds and other Stuff he's seen that morning

and sniper will reply with a "[heart] [thumbs up]" but he'll be up in his tower doing target practice and kicking his legs giddily and rereading medic's texts 490000000000000000 times throughout the day and Meticulously chooses emojis for his One Word Response

[mickmundy]

honestly i don't think sniper is a dirty person lol. i think he knows/accepts that Being Grody comes with his job sometimes so he'll deal with it with no fuss, and everyone enjoys working up a sweat now and then, but i don't think he's someone with Bad Hygiene, not even a little!

he clearly shaves regularly and brushes his teeth and he'd have to know how to take care of himself if he's been a survivalist and whatnot. i don't think he does Skincare Routines or Self Cares on the level that maybe spy or medic would, but i definitely wouldn't say that he like. pees all over himself or Actively Chooses to stink or "be gross". i think he knows it comes with the job/his hobbies (taxidermy, hunting, survivalism stuff) so he's like "eh whatever" but he loves hot showers and a fresh change of clothes.

i think that Because he's been out in the wilderness sleeping in buffalo corpses etc he'd Appreciate being clean that much more. like i think something he really Loves is a hot shower after a gross day on the field. hot water dries out his Already Dry/chapped skin but he doesn't care because it feels good Dammit!

and with jarate i don't think he'd keep the jars in his home either.. if he doesn't have a tiny toilet in his camper then he'd just go outside/to the base to do his business?? and he'd probably fill them while working and just keep them in his Weapon Crate for the next fight..idk

whereas like spy would just. Be So Pissed if he got Even Remotely Dirty (again he'd acknowledge work is work but wouldn't be Happy about it LOL)

medic and sniper are more like "oh well! let's get our hands dirty! >:) it'll be worth it in the end!" and spy's like "EUGHHH!" med and snip wandering around after battle and looking for dead animal corpses or Cool Stuff and spy is like "GROSS XP"! like he's not Put Off by gore (given his job) but i don't think he'd like. actively pursue it. whereas medic and sniper would be like "oh! a vulture ribcage! in tact! yippee! ^__^"

spy's like "i'm going to leave you two Freaks alone i am only interested in this stuff when it is made into a belt or shoes! >:/" and has tea with heavy and reads books and spy vents about how their bffs are gross and heavy nods and is like "da... they are.. unconventional.. ^_^;"

like in my mind they interact like this:

sniper and medic: kneeling in the dirt and giggling with their backs to spy spy: *looks over their shoulders Reluctantly (but he's nosy so he can't help it) what exactly are you two doing :| sniper: *holds up corpse of [animal] Way Too Close to spy's face (he's very enthusiastic)* look! it's perfectly preserved! :D medic: *clapping his hands Delightedly* yippee!! i am going to bleach zhe bones! ^v^ hoo hoo! spy: *Frowns In All Caps* i am Sincerely sorry I asked

[mickmundy]

medic walking around dropping things flinging them around etc and sniper's just trotting behind him catching all of the expensive glassware and Science Stuff until his arms are full and he catches the Final thing on the toe of his boot and medic's like "now, where did i put the- ah! ^v^ there!" and Gently takes it from sniper's grasp and drums his fingers on it and is like "danke, spatzchen.,,. <3" and kisses him softly on the cheek and sniper gets flustered because it was so Chaste And Unexpected and drops everything....

and literally Everything shatters. just completely unsalvageable. and sniper looks/is completely mortified and is like "oh holy hell. i am SO sorry doc, i-"

medic cuts him off by laughing Loudly and he takes sniper's cheeks in his Large Gloved Hands and plants a kiss on sniper's lips and is like "ohhhohoh... my darling.. i hope to always make you drop my beakers. <3"

and sniper gives him a crooked grin out of the side of his mouth and is like "ouehhgeh.,., pphpbhpbttt.," and scoffs but the tips of his ears are Red and medic can't help but giggle a little bit and medic strokes sniper's cheekbones with his thumbs Lovingly and gives him a Tender Look and sniper gives it back...

then medic puts his hands on his hips and is like "So. will you help me clean this up while i place a Mann Co order?"

and sniper's like "yeap. yup. this's my bad." and medic Laughs Lovingly because hes in Love....

sniper Cannot stop grinning and he begins to sweep it up while medic paces around (Unintentionally, in the mess that sniper just swept up) and is like "do i want the large beakers, or the small ones?- what did i just break again?" and sniper chuckles lovingly because he's in Love!

[mickmundy]

a personal spy headcanon that i literally never stop thinking about is that he loves practical jokes. he'll wake up early and put cooking oil on the floor of the kitchen and sit down at a table and read (hide behind) the newspaper and as soon as Any of the mercs come Running in they slip and eat shit on the oil and crash into the door, (or better yet the oven), which makes engineer go "God Dammit I just fixed that!" and the merc that wiped out can't stand up bc of the oil and spy's shoulders will be Shaking trying not to laugh from behind the newspaper (more under the cut)

and he'll pepper in some Faux Disgust and make comments like "good lord, can't you miscreants watch where you are going?!" etc. and the more mercs he can make angry at Other mercs the better the joke is. like if he can manage to get engineer, sniper, demo or medic pissed off at scout or soldier for running in and slipping, it instantly makes the joke a 100000/10 bc Eng/Snip/Dem/Med's insults are ALWAYS the best. especially bc when they get Really Pissed or Riled Up... they just start Spitting Insults in their native slang/languages which Rules (to spy, bc he delights in learning new things about other dialects + the prank itself)

or he'll polish glass doors/windows Really Well and trick scout into thinking they're open so that scout slams against them and leaves a Print of his smashed face against it and in the moment he'll always be Decently Composed (a Gentleman's Chuckle is the most they'll get out of him) but when he's alone in his smoking room at the end of the day and he's recalling his Successes he throws his head back and snorts and puts his hands on his knees and does his Snort Laugh (which i think is his genuine laugh tbh)

also this is when heavy will be Quietly Observing spy this entire time and be like "spy. you are the one pranking." and spy's like !!!! and whips his head around and is like "don't be Ridiculous! as if something so childish would Ever--" and huffs Indignantly.. and heavy gives him a gentle grin and shrugs and is like "of course, heavy understands. i will keep this between us then." and spy's like 🤨…. and heavy chuckles and is like "was funny when soldier crashed into oven. engineer danced like sniper's truck bobblehead."

and spy snorts and hums/nods and heavy grins and is like "spy likes to laugh?" and spy smiles softly and laughs sheepishly and is like "….. i suppose.., once and a while,., even I am not above a good laugh.,.," and heavy nods and smiles and is like "da. like scout?" and spy chuckles softly and spy's body language relaxes a little bit and spy is like "i suppose... yes..., but his mother has a good sense of humor too. it would be difficult to trace where he gets it from." and heavy and spy share A Look.........................................

"where is pyro in all this?" simple question warrants a simple answer: pyro wears non slip boots so he is Immune to spy's pranks and also spy Never pranks pyro. pyro is True Neutral Merc (also because pyro bakes for spy so he doesn't have the heart to dunk on him)

[mickmundy]

spy headcanon thread! just some of my personal thoughts and musings about his character :-) enjoy!

starting off by saying that spy is Absolutely Everything to me.. i've put his thread off for so long because i have SO much to say and im afraid i'll leave stuff out BUT we're going to take a Stab at it (😏) and i guess i'll just add more stuff later if i need! As Usual this is just pasted from my twitter so i'm sorry for any wonky formatting issues!

the most important thing to me about spy's character is that it is Varied and can be Contradictory. i say this about all of the mercs tbh but spy is among the Most important given his role/occupation as a spy. he IS A Spy, but he's also Just Some Guy (gender neutral).

spy is a bit dry; very sarcastic, a bit stoic, but he's definitely not heartless. i think he's very "emotionally in-tune" to those around him and prides himself on being able to read a room exceptionally well!

... but just because he knows what people might be thinking doesn't mean he's going to do anything about it! he likes being in the know but seldom ever enjoys interfering; it's best if he keeps out of the fray, or so he tells himself!

that being said, i Do think spy makes exceptions to this rule (which To Me is what makes his character Interesting!).... as we see in expiration date! he spends his "last living days" helping scout become a worthy date for miss pauling!

if he sees someone Floundering or really stuck in some kind of emotional squander, he'll pass by with a hand on the shoulder and a concise, discreet, kind word of advice in their ear and move on. no need for thanks, he's just Sharing an Observation! if you try to thank him, he'll give you a coy look and be like "for what?" but he knows. he's just letting you know you don't need to thank him <3

loves breaking balls. he'll help you if you ask him, but not before he gives you a LOT of shit for it. he'll volunteer himself to help you (even if you tell him you need his Stinking Help!) and he'll roll his eyes and say "ha! you are So helpless! i know you're glad i'm here to see this through with you uUu" LOL

but he will give you genuine insight and Surprisingly Good advice. huh, you didn't know he knew you so well! despite his job as a spy, he'll tell you to be authentic and will encourage you to listen to your instincts.

is an Observer First and an Action-taker second. prioritizes being in the know and likes being in the background (despite how good he is at being in the spotlight!). always thinks before he speaks, very calculated in everything he does!

got wiser with age. when he was younger i think he was quick to save his own skin and thought only about himself. among his first "selfless" acts were running out on scout and his mom to "protect" them, but with the wisdom of hindsight, that wasn't the smartest idea!

firmly believes in the power of respect. seems to have a positive relationship with all of his teammates (yes, even sniper, engineer and pyro lol) and scout's mom, too (regardless of how u see their relationship). tells scout that he has to earn pauling's respect to be worthy of her!

won't hesitate to stick his neck out for/work with people he appreciates. in the comics, he works with (and even prioritizes the safety of) miss pauling, helps sniper, and obviously comforts scout when he's dying in the way that Scout would want to be comforted. good job pops!

which brings me to dadspy... how i love you... i could make an entire other thread about my dadspy thoughts BUT i'll keep it "brief" here. i don't think he ever "treated scout like shit" nor do i think he was abusive to scout's mom or scout. he's just the world's most mediocre absent father to me... KDSKF

i think scout's mom knew What Spy Was and knew that at some point, he'd have to leave her. i think she's a perfectly capable woman who spy is genuinely still in love with (they have an open, long-distance relationship!) and is quite the deadly catch herself! perhaps i'll make a thread on her if that's something people would want....

i don't think she resents spy for running out and i think spy has complicated feelings about running out. he's convinced himself he did it for everyone involved's safety but in hindsight he Does feel a Bit (emphasis on Bit. it's not Earth Shatteringly Dramatic, just a little demon that sneaks up on him now and then...) guilty and tries to "make up for it" by Trying to get along with scout even if it's... not easy LOL. him turning into tom jones when scout died was to comfort scout the way Scout would want, which i think says a lot about spy's character.

however, once scout finds out the truth, i think he tells spy that he shouldn't have lied to him about it ("what kind of dumbass lies to their son on his deathbed! 🧍") and spy's like "ah... i suppose that... was also a mistake." and they smirk/smile at each other.. Road To Forgiveness begins..

also i personally love the running gag that everyone knows that spy is scout's dad (except for scout), not because i think spy would tell all/even some of the mercs but because it's SO obvious that all of them are like "i mean yeah.. doy". extra points if their knowledge Also surprises spy. "WHO TOLD YOU? HOW DID YOU KNOW?!" and the mercs are like ??? "erm... we have eyes...?" LOL

DESPITE being Stoic and Unknowable and Mysterious, he is also Quite the Doofus. one of my favorite and most important thoughts on his character. i think his authentic laugh is his snort laugh and i think that's what made scout's mom fall in love with him... :') has a great sense of humor.

loves playing pranks, causing mischief and being a Smug Cunt. will hide behind his Carefully Crafted Facade, but those who really know him (heavy, scout's mom) can see right through it! teaches scout some of his "best ones" (though not before pranking HIM with them first! it's okay though. scout's a good sport and gives him props LMAO)

a short list of spy's "best ones":

cleaning a glass door REALLY well and tricking the mercs to run into it at full force

oil on the kitchen floor so that anyone who comes running in will slam into the oven that engineer Just Fixed God Dammit! and destroy it

mentos in soda

scout and spy have the "same laugh" when they REALLY start howling. snorting, wheezing.... they sound almost identical. usually if they're laughing THAT hard, the rest of the mercs are looking at them like this >__> (covered in soda, can't get up from the ground because oil, etc)

obviously enjoys literature! language is one of his favorite things, though. loves learning about different dialects, slang, accents and learning the intricacies of grammar, too! likes studying the other mercs for this reason. the base is a fun, mixed bag for him!

the best secret keeper. contrary to popular belief, spy will NOT air your business if it's Serious. he might "let it slip" to medic that sniper sleeps with a stuffed animal, but he won't let anyone know that heavy has ptsd. he likes giving people shit, but not genuinely causing harm!

ah.. breaking balls as a love language.. this is something that i think is shared between spy, scout, and scout's mom. they LOOOOVE to give you shit, but it comes from a loving place. i think a lot of scout and spy's banter in exp date is like this:

it's not actually Insulting to either of them (spy calling scout a failure, scout telling spy to go to hell, etc) and is in fact more like a thing of Endearment. if you know people like this then you know what i'm talking about. idk how else to describe it KSDFKS

he is very girlfailure that thinks he's a girlboss but is actually a girlfailure and is coming to terms with his girlfailing. as i've said, spy isn't heartless. he knows he's made mistakes and knows his job has costed him a lot and now he's trying to reconcile with it. sometimes it's funny, sometimes its angsty!

is a total foodie and has a LOT of opinions about all kinds of cuisine! loves cooking with engineer and pyro (YES i think pyro is an INCREDIBLE chef. they only burn things because it's fun/funny! for the bit. you understand), and heavy has a perfect palette (just a personal hc of mine heh) so he always gets to tag along and taste test! <3

if spy is involved with any of the other mercs, scout's mom knows about it. they're in an open relationship and spy values her just like he'd value any of the mercs in a romantic relationship. she knows all of them and they're all very polite to her (ala like they are with miss pauling), but she quickly surprises them by being snarky and playful like spy and scout! she also doesn't hesitate to begin telling the mercs the most Humiliating Dirt on spy AND scout! HEHEHE

i don't think he'd cheat on her nor do i think he'd bother cheating on any of his partners. he's very open with communication when it comes to his interpersonal relationships (this is ironic to everyone but him because his relationship with his son is currently in shambles). he's good at it when it comes to romantic relationships though!

his love languages are, well, any and all of them! he loves being in love, he's a huge romantic and is not shy about showing it. will absolutely DROWN his partner in gifts and pretty words (that he really does mean!) and so on... perhaps to the point of it being a little overwhelming! at his partner's request, he'll dial it back... but he still loves to spoil his lovers, and THAT is something he WON'T apologize for! >:)

as i touched on earlier, has a good rapport with all of the mercs and pauling. he's patient with soldier and the other mercs hear him out about the bucket list idea (and are all Quietly Amused by how scout promptly ruins that for him. team dynamic ykwim). i think he's the closest with heavy (i'm a spoovy enjoyer), engineer, pyro, and sniper (BUT in kind of a "unique" way. perhaps i'll elaborate) but he enjoys the company of all of the other mercs as well!

is Informed about engineer's, demoman's and medic's research (though not on the levels they are of course) and likes being in the know about things going on around the base. he mostly shares enemy intelligence with these three over anyone else. they talk frequently and Love to gossip (engineer SWEARS its not gossiping but demo and medic are like "no. its gossip!" SKDFKSDF)!

will absolutely always enable you to treat yourself. scout, spy, medic and demo are the KINGS of "go on!! treat yourself!! :D" no matter what it is. if spy sees you really struggling about whether to get something, he'll slip it in with his own purchases and gift it to you later. "this one is from me, so you don't need to worry about compromise. <3"

in battle, he's a bit more sadistic than his teammates; likes making people squirm and is more than capable of getting under your skin. information extraction is part of his job and he treats it as such: Part Of The Job. he doesn't get a LOT of pleasure from hurting others, but he Does enjoy starring in a good revenge tale!

no, i do NOT think the world's most absent father cares about his 30 year old son's sex life nor do i think he's even "fiercely overprotective" of scout just in general. i think he knows scout is a grown man who has to make (and account for) any failures and fumbles he makes in his life. he'll be there with a kind word (and a few snarky ones!) when shit hits the fan, but he's not running around fighting scout's battles for him. scout loves battling too much to let him anyway! LOL

he teaches him things that Spy Himself values (like respect) because he... values it and since spy IS trying to be a bit more of a Dad to scout, it's also a reflection on him (to spy. scout doesn't care or think of it that way). insists on the value of self improvement! (something he himself didn't learn until he was Much Older... but scout doesn't need to know that!)