#enjoy my boundless muse I'm having

[frxcturedcosmos]

{{ Currently in the chokehold of the idea that Arin voluntarily hides the fact that she’s human from the paladins for as long as possible, and especially from Keith during his time with the Blades.  Most Blades we see hide their faces 99% of the time anyway, Keith, Krolia, Kolivan and Ulaz really being the only faces we really see (that I can remember atm), so her face being obscured whenever they have meetings or joint training/missions isn’t a shock.  Some of the paladins have their suspicions cause she’s.... tiny, for a Galra.  The only reason they find out is during a joint mission where a good blow to the head causes her helmet to short circuit and reveal her very human face.  Confusion and angst ensue, Arin is honestly kinda terrified.  She’s not really ready to identify as an actual human again, which is why her identity stays hidden.  Makes her face a lot of feelings. }}

[feedthepheasants]

Writing Interview Tag Game!! eeeeee!!!!

thank you thank you thank you for the tags @dr-demi-bee & @mothermoth92 !! ♥♥♥

When did you start writing?

I feel so silly saying I've always been a writer. As a kid, I loved telling stories and creating/performing as characters in a variety of facets. I remember in elementary school (foggy on what grade), I had a creative writing project where we had to write a short story based on a picture. My mom got a call home two weeks later when I hadn't turned it in - I just couldn't stop writing.

When I got into middle school and found ~the boundless wonders & horrors of unrestricted internet access~ I started writing even more - one shots, fanfics, short stories, play scripts, the beginnings of would-be novels. And I still have my first laptop, with all of that stuff still on it! I just can't remember my password. :')

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

Absolutely!

As a reader, my top genres are fantasy/adventure, historical fiction and classics. That said, I enjoy romance/romantasy, sci-fi, mystery/thriller memoirs and contemporary novels more and more as I get older! But my first love has always been fantasy/adventure. One of my more unconventional tastes as a reader, however, are dissertations and research papers/articles on historical topics, and pre 13th-century plays/fables/short stories/poems!

My writing (especially in recent years) has primarily been in the fantasy/adventure genre. I've dabbled in others, mostly contemporary/romance stories and playwrighting, but I feel most comfortable in fantasy/adventure by a long run.

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

I think to be compared to any prolific writer would genuinely be an honor I would carry with me to my grave!

As a fantasy writer, I have taken many notes on GRRM's writing and world-building and applied it towards developing my own voice as a writer. Erin Morgenstern and Pierce Brown are two writers I would add to my 'aspire to be' list, though I have so many and it's so hard to choose!

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

I write wherever and whenever I can.

Most of the time, that's my couch or my bed, but it's also been my work office, the car, my gate at the airport, the bathroom at a party, a creaky kitchen table at a pet/house-sitting gig..

However, my favorite place is definitely my couch with my autumn-scented candles, plethora of blankets, and my cushy headphones playing my 26 hour film score playlist. Add some fuzzy socks and Ghibli films on my TV and nobody will see me for a week. Bonus points if it's raining outside!

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Again, sounding silly here, but you know that one William Blake poem? "To see a world in a grain of sand / and heaven in a wildflower / hold infinity in the palm of your hand / and eternity in an hour" ? That's how I feel about mustering a muse.

Literally anything can spark an idea for me, be it a plot, a character, or a moment in a story. It's very important to me to write what I know, and to write about the world and people around me, so I base a lot of my characters and their backgrounds/stories around the experiences of myself and the people in my life - the close and the distant, the old and the new. Even a breeze can send me into a flurry that won't rest until I write whatever I'm thinking down, which is why I keep a mini notebook and my notes app accessible at all times!

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

Most of the time, I find myself writing about characters who don't feel like they belong in one place. They're split between something; a decision, two people, two paths their lives could go down. In fact, the novel I've been working on and intend to submit for publishing in the near future is just that: the two primary characters are based off of myself, split in two. And boy has that been a rollercoaster ride!

Other general themes that have made their way into most of my writing are complex familial relationships, growing up (because we never really stop!), people coming and going in life, and the idea that you can never go back, no matter how much you try. Also, always the 'what could've been' of every choice. I think reflecting upon life-isms is one of my favorites, because it's something you see in literature through history and connects us with those who came before - again, realizing we're not alone.

What is your reason for writing?

Writing has always been an escape for me, and it was, for a very long time, the only thing I had that was ever mine.

Performative is a great word to describe my upbringing. Not going into too much detail, I often felt very 'on display' at family functions and other social gatherings when I felt uncomfortable or uneasy performing (I was an instrumentalist for 17 years, and was always forced 'asked' to entertain at functions). It had been a beloved hobby of mine, but I grew to resent it because of how often it was used against me.

So, when I got my first computer and began writing and posting stories, I didn't tell a single soul from my personal life. Especially not when I gained traction on the websites my writing was posted on, nor when I had earned a significant following. For years, the only people who knew were the internet friends I'd made through writing. Even now, there are only a handful of people in my outside life circles that know I write, and even fewer have ever actually read any of my creative writing. I think I still have a fear of losing something very dear to me. I like the anonymity - there's less pressure to exceed expectations, and there's fewer eyes to watch you fall.

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

Receiving comments in general is extremely motivating. I rarely share my work with people in my outside life circles, so I mostly rely on feedback/interactions with friends/readers online. Honestly, just knowing that people enjoy the work I produce means the world, whether it's through a like/kudos, reblog, or anything.

What really makes me crazy (in a good way!) is when people do character analysis or relation to my work. It's very rewarding (and quite frankly, very healing) to see when others identify with the experiences, thoughts or feelings that I write about. I tend to spiral and feel very isolated during difficult periods of life, and the reminder that I'm not the only one is very comforting.

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

I want to be someone who, when I post a project, at least one person is excited to read what I've created. I've been in a lot of rooms where I've felt like what I feel or have to say doesn't mean anything, so I think the idea of reaching one person who does want to hear/read what I have to say would absolutely rock my world.

What I don't want is to be the kind of writer where readers can't engage critically with what I've created. I think both positive and critical feedback are essential to me as an artist. If I write something that just isn't great, needs work, has plot holes or doesn't make sense for how I've led a character's development thus far, constructive feedback is more than welcomed. As I get older, I get better and better at separating my art from myself, which makes taking criticism easier, and makes me more receptive to making the necessary changes.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

It's been a controversial topic in the past, but I love creating flawed people who make mistakes. That's just a part of life - everyone does things they wish they could take back, things they regret, words they wish they'd never said. I put a lot of that into my characters (with original works predominantly) because I think it makes them more relatable. Nothing irks me more than when a main character always makes the dutiful choice, the sacrifice, and does everything right.

I LOVE when a character fails! I LOVE when they make a mistake, and lose a battle. It means they learn something. I LOVE when a character trusts, and is so egregiously betrayed that I'm doubled over on the floor, heaving for breath and about to be physically sick because I cannot believe what just happened (looking at you, Red Rising). Because I have a lot of my own regrets, I try to find closure through writing. It doesn't always work, but it helps.

When you write, are you influenced by what others enjoy might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?

I try to write a little bit of both. I want to write things that are personal and meaningful to me, but I also want to write things that people can relate to.

In regards to my novel-in-progress, I've taken a story that I really want to tell, and have polled so many readers and read so many forums and threads about what readers want and don't want in the older-y/a fantasy/adventure range, and have been adapting characters and plotlines to meet those. (For example: I love the heightened stakes of war and political drama, I love heavy lore and world building, I love devasting romance, and I also love smut. Still haven't found a book that hits the mark with all of these!)

How do you feel about your own writing?

Yikes!

I don't by any means think I'm a bad writer. All artists get self-conscious and doubt their work at times - I tend to do that more often than not, especially when I post something for people to read and react to. I definitely think I have a lot of room to grow, but I also recognize that I have come very far.

I also recognize, that I have strengths when it comes to writing styles, and I 100% have weaknesses. Unfortunately, my current fic is written in first person present tense - why, god why, did I do this to myself? I hate it! I love the character, the story is very close and personal to me, but the longer it's gone on, the harder it has been to push through - though there has been progress recently! After this, however, I'll stick to third person or narrative '_ x reader', because it's what I feel most comfortable with.

The biggest thing is that I enjoy the stories that I want to tell, but I'm so indecisive about how I want to tell them. Sometimes, none of the words feel right, and other times, all of the words feel right and I can't make a decision because they all feel different even when they mean the same thing!

As always, no pressure tagging @crimson-and-lavender , @waterdeep-weavemoss and @honeybee-bard !

[soob1nn]

MY FAMILY - HOGWARTS DR

REMINDER! I haven’t shifted yet, so all these is just my imagination 🤍

masterlist - main masterlist

In this space, I'll introduce you to the wonderful cast of characters in my DR world, a mix of canon figures and unique creations. They're all an integral part of my journey, and I can't wait to share their stories with you.

REMUS JOHN LUPIN - MY FATHER

My father holds a special place in my heart; our relationship is defined by an extraordinary closeness that transcends the ordinary. His sweet disposition is a cornerstone of our connection, and his unwavering support and love create a strong, un breakable bond between us. Beyond his innate kindness, he possesses a remarkable quality -that of being an exceptionally listener. When I confide in him, it’s as if he has an innate ability to understand and truly hear every word.

Morover, his intelligence shines brightly, illuminating his every action and conversation. He not only imparts wisdom but also embodies it, making him a role model and guide in my life. Ot’s no wonder that he holds the esteemed position of a Defense Against the Dark Arts professor at Hogwarts, where he imparts his knowledge and wisdom to aspiring witches and wizards, sharping their destines in the magical world.

NYMPHADORA TONKS LUPIN - MY MOTHER

She is my mother, a presence in my life that I hold dear. While our connection is strong, I must admit that my days at Hogwarts have me spending more time with my father, who teaches there and is a constant presence in my daily life.

Tonks, is not only exceptionally sweet but also an extraordinary mother. Her love and care are boundless, and she dedicates herself to ensuring my well-being and happiness. Her intelligence is evident in the wisdom she imparts, and her guidance has been invaluable in shaping my life.

Though I may not see her as often as I do my father, she remains an enduring influence on my life, a beacon of love and wisdom.

EDWARD REMUS LUPIN - MY BROTHER

Edward Remus Lupin is not just my brother; he's my identical twin, and our connection runs deep. While I'm sorted into Hufflepuff, he's proudly donned the colors of Slytherin, and our sibling rivalry often bubbles to the surface.

Edward is undeniably sweet, but there are moments when I could happily throttle him, a testament to the love-hate dynamic that exists between us. Our fights are legendary, but beneath it all, there's an unbreakable bond forged in shared secrets and childhood adventures.

He never lets me forget that he's three minutes my senior, a fact he proudly flaunts at every opportunity. Edward is a lover of both the night and revelry, often seen enjoying a smoke or partying with friends.

Yet, perhaps his true passion lies in the gentle caress of piano keys, for music is his refuge and muse. He pours his heart and soul into those ivory and ebony notes, weaving emotions and stories with each melody. Despite our differences and bickering, I can't help but admire his dedication to his music.

[bloodcrave]

How did you choose making Alina a strzyga?

intriguing question! a small number of reasons led to this.

the summer i made her, i wanted a supernatural muse of some sort. i was leaning towards demon, and i wanted to explore morally gray/more akin to "evil" in nature. a part of me really missed roleplaying raven from t.een t.itans, but i really didn't have the energy or desire to pick her back up again as a muse because, as much as i love her character, i didn't really mesh with writing her. i was really enjoying writing xayah from l.eague of l.egends, who is sort of a morally gray supernatural being herself... but i wanted something different with no canon already semi created.

amber had also recently started getting into douxie from t.ales of a.rcadia, and while i love love nari from the franchise, i wanted someone who could really kind of be a counter to him. and of course many of my lovely multi characters could au with him, but none of them had that kind of click into his world and story. and so already wanting this new character, i saw her playing douxie as another driving factor. i was going to make this muse regardless, but to ignore my desire to really craft another relationship between muses with amber would be a lie LMAO

so how i settled on the strzyga was i actually just started looking up polish mythology. my mom's side of the family is polish, i think it was either my great great grandparents or the my great great great grandparents the came to the states from poland. we have the documents and everything of that whole lineage, and i just thought that was super cool. so while i don't really go around claiming i'm polish, that's a big part of my ancestry, so i decided to start there to see if there was anything fun and unique i could play with. i don't really remember how i stumbled upon the strzyga but i did in just my boundless googling. i took some time to really kind of get the basics and some of the knowledge together, then thought of ways i would spin it and how i could make a roleplayer character out of it... and just somehow or another, alina was born!

...so yeah that's really it. i wanted a demon/morally gray character, got the punk rocker inspiration from amber's muse, and then the power of google and research! and then just my own creativity because i have fully put my own spin on the species and will repeatedly remind people i am not 100% following original lore. strzyga are my t.wilight vampires now, except i don't make them sparkle lol.

as a random aside, i think i watched the w.itcher on netflix like two weeks after making alina and they have the episode with the strzyga and i was just. well now i look like i'm just sort of taking from the show/games but really they had no influence on me, i hadn't watched/read/seen anything about them until i did my googling lmao

[deerydear]

Idle musings of a sour note:

Tumblr has a strange culture. I've enjoyed a lot of stories in my time... Yet, to come onto tumblr and find other people discussing them.... disgusting them...

"Other people", of course. I could play some grim, ugly refrain, giving names to this-and-that...

"I name you... ugly-monkey-butt! ......and I name you.... Poopoo Papa!"

lol.

So, "fandoms" (fan-kingdoms) can build around a story. They may develop their own "fanon" (fan-canon; i.e. things that do not actually happen in the story, but which are memetically-propagated within the culture of the fandom.)

So how do these fandoms propagate?

I feel that a big 'factor' is in people who have not actually read the Original story... or perhaps they "found out about the story through the influence of fandom", and so they may have been primed by the fanonical lense applied to it -- to already react to the events in the story a certain way.

This is why I cherish those stories that I read in the times before I founded a blog. I didn't 'instantly-react', I didn't update my blog to say: "HOLY SHIT GUYS! THIS IS CRAZY!"

It was me with my nose in the book, immersed in an intercourse with the characters of the story.

Now, are there interesting stories inspired by other stories? Yes, of course. Many authors have been inspired by art.

There is a difference in ecosystem between a "fan-collective", and a singular fan, and a small group of friends who discuss something together.

I get a very 'oppressive sense' from tumblr, and I always have, since I discovered it. Yet, there is also boundless creativity to be found on the world wide web... so what will I do?

i feel a good balance of nice energy & rude energy cioming through the monitor at me, and i think i will stay online for about 3 more hours. --- wint@dril

fucking lab rats drinking morphine-laced water when they're kept alone, and preferring normal water when they're socially-engaged. (both sets of rats have a choice of drink)

....but can't anything have a 'fanonical lense', so to speak?

Such as... trying to interpret the results of a scientific experiment. Just like what I just said... the way I phrased it. How I related it to my own set of experiences... that's all... so...

human.

I think I have a deep antipathy for ....something. I thought "the human race", but then I recoiled from that. Its more about the 'cultures' of people. Sick, empty, impoverished of meaning. Is this all a result of "the greater system at work"? Don't people have a choice in where their own lives go?

Yes, well, at the same time.... the product ends up very ugly if you try to force people to change.

Even if they acqueisce, agree, follow you enthusiastically... it just is not natural. Believe me, I've tried. I learned my lesson. Even myself: I guillessly followed a few self-assured idiots, and only through realizing that my "new output" had become irredeemably ugly, did I ever put it down. Who cares about heartless, intellectual arguments, in the face of beauty? Beauty is intellect that becomes integrated into the sense world. It's deeper... Simplicity.

In the theoretical realm, I sound really mean. -- like I'm just 'berating fans for no reason'. but if I showed an example.... hm, well what inspired me to write this?

continue reading...

A few people have written offshoot stories where the child B had loved the child A, and mourned their death. This became a popular 'fanon': that idea of a motive for revenge against L.

....but, I find that so.... saccharine.... cloying. Stupid. Perhaps that feeling stems from my own detachment from social bonds, wherefore I........

Well, actually...

My question is:

"Do you think you can replace Madness?"

As I see it, Grief is an exhaustible motive. Eventually you will get sick, and sick of paring yourself down and down to fit into the box of the "Victim", the "Underdog who is supposed to overtake the Suppressor".

what if you were doing things just to see what happened?

what if life was an experiment?

as yelyahnaloj said today, it's good to think of an experiment as telling a story. it cannot be separate from the context within which it took. At least... not without sacrificing data.

So maybe this child was inspired by what he saw going on around in life.

I think that human relations can be much more complex than simply "love" or "hate", or shades in-between. After all, we have Sadism and Masochism, which seem to light up both centers at once.

...feeling for another person can be "layered". Perhaps the ones "on top", (i.e. conscious) are not Falsities.... Are there rules to human cognition? Who is to say I haven't loved someone who I also hated so, so much. I was glad when he died, even though I love him. I still love him. People are more than paper.

Perhaps "fandom" can seem strangely neutered. After all, a blogger may want to "portray a good face". So-called "social-justice culture" is endemic to this website...

Actually, no, I think it's just a welcoming host. From what I heard, SJWism (and the annoying, cloying attitudes) may have originated (in their recent forms)... on the Something Awful webforums.

I think vanity is ugly.

I relate very much to Czesław Miłosz's profile of Beta:

"When I met Beta in 1942, he was twenty years old. He was a lively boy with black, intelligent eyes. The palms of his hands perspired, and there was that exaggerated shyness in his behavior that usually be­speaks immense ambition. Behind his words one felt a mixture of arrogance and humility. In conversation he seemed inwardly convinced of his own superi­ority; he attacked ferociously yet retreated immedi­ately, bashfully hiding his claws. His ripostes were full of pent-up irony. Probably, though, these char­acteristics were most pronounced when he spoke with me or with other writers older than he. As a beginning poet, he felt he owed them a certain re­spect, but actually he believed they were none too deserving of it. He knew better; in him lay the prom­ise of a truly great writer.

In 1942 in Warsaw, we were living without hope, or rather on a hope we knew to be a delusion. The empire which had absorbed our country was so mighty that only an incorrigible optimist could be­lieve in the possibility of a totally vanquished Ger­many. Nazi plans in regard to our nation were per­fectly clear: to exterminate the educated class, to colonize, and to deport a segment of the population to the East.

Beta was one of the young people who started writing during the War, in the language of slaves. He supported himself by various odd jobs. It is hard to define exactly how people earn a living in a city completely outside the law. Usually they took half-ficti­tious posts in an office or factory that supplied them with a work-card plus the opportunity to operate a black market or to steal, which was not regarded as immoral because it injured the Germans. At the same time, he studied in the underground university and shared the exuberant life of the resistance youth. He went to meetings where he and the other young peo­ple drank vodka, argued heatedly about literature and politics, and read illegal publications.

But he smiled scornfully at his comrades; he saw things more clearly than they. He found their patriotic zeal for battle against the Germans a purely irrational reflex. Battle-yes, but in the name of what? None of these young people believed any longer in democracy. Most of the countries of East­ern Europe had been semi-dictatorships before the War; and the parliamentary system seemed to belong to a dead era. There was no question as to how one came into power; whoever wanted to take over au­thority had only to seize it by force, or else create a "movement" to exert pressure on the government for admittance into a coalition. This was an age of nationalist "movements," and Warsaw youth was still very much under their influence even though, ob­viously, it had no sympathy for either Hitler or Mus­solini. Its reasoning was confused. The Polish nation was oppressed by the Germans; so, one had to fight. When Beta declared that they were merely counter­ing German nationalism with Polish nationalism, his comrades shrugged their shoulders. When he asked what values they wanted to defend or on what prin­ciples Europe was to be built in the future, he got no reply.

Here indeed was a well of darkness: no hope of liberation, and no vision of tomorrow. A battle for battle's sake. A return to the pre-war status quo, bad though it had been, was to be the reward for those who might live to see the victory of the Anglo-Saxons. This lack of any sort of vision led him to see the world as a place in which nothing existed out­side of naked force. It was a world of decline and fall. And the liberals of the older generation, mouth­ing nineteenth-century phrases about respect for man-while all about them hundreds of thousands of people were being massacred-were fossil remains.

Beta had no faith, religious or other, and he had the courage to admit it in his poems. He ran off his first volume of verse on a mimeograph machine. No sooner had I received his book and pried apart its sticky pages than I realized that here was a real poet. The reading of his hexameters was not, how­ever, a joyous undertaking. The streets of occupied Warsaw were gloomy. Underground meetings in cold and smoky rooms, when one listened for the sound of Gestapo boots on the stairs, were like grim rituals conducted in catacombs. We were living at the bot­tom of a huge crater, and the sky far up above was the only element we shared with the other people on the face of the earth. All this was in his verse-gray­ness, fog, gloom, and death. Still his was not a poetry of grievance but of icy stoicism. The poems of this entire generation lacked faith. Their fundamental motif was a call to arms and a vision of death. Unlike young poets of other epochs, they did not see death as a romantic theme but as a real presence. Almost all these young writers of Warsaw died before the end of the War either at the hands of the Gestapo or in battle. None of them, however, questioned the meaning of sacrifice to the same degree as did he. "There will remain after us only scrap-iron and the hollow, jeering laughter of generations," he wrote in one of his verses.

His poetry had in it none of that affirmation of the world that is present in the sympathy with which the artist portrays, for example, an apple or a tree. What his verse disclosed was a profoundly disturbed equilibrium. One can divine a great deal from a work of art, e.g. that the world of Bach or of Breughel was ordered, arranged hierarchically. Modem art reflects the disequilibrium of modem society in that it so often springs from a blind passion vainly seeking to sate itself in form, color, or sound. An artist can contemplate sensual beauty only when he loves all that surrounds him on earth. But if all he feels is loathing at the discrepancy between what he would wish the world to be and what it is in reality, then he is incapable of standing still and beholding. He is ashamed of reflexes of love; he is condemned to perpetual motion, to a restless sketching of discon­tinued, broken observations of nature. Like a sleep­walker, he loses his balance as soon as he stops mov­ing. Beta's poems were whirlpools of fog, saved from complete chaos only by the dry rhythm of his hexameters. This character of his poetry must be attributed at least in part to the fact that he belonged to an ill-fated generation in an ill-fated nation, but he had thousands of brothers in all the countries of Europe, all of them passionate and deceived.

Unlike his comrades who acted out of loyalty to their fatherland, on Christian or vague metaphysical grounds, he needed a rational basis for action. When the Gestapo arrested him in 1943, it was rumored in our city that he was taken as the result of an "acci­dent" to one of the left-wing groups. If life in War­saw was little reminiscent of paradise, then Beta now found himself in the lower circle of hell: the "con­centration universe." In what was then the normal order of events, he spent several months in jail be­fore being shipped off to Auschwitz. Incredibly, he managed to survive there for two years. When the Red Army drew near, he and the other prisoners were transported to Dachau, and there they were eventually set free by the Americans. We learned of all this only after the War, when he published a vol­ume of stories recounting his experiences."

[...]

"I have read many books about concentration camps, but not one of them is as terrifying as his sto­ries because he never moralizes, he relates. A special social hierarchy comes into being in a "concentra­tion universe." At the top stand the camp authorities; after them come prisoners trusted by the administra­tion; next come the prisoners clever enough to find means of getting sufficient food to keep up their strength. At the bottom stand the weak and clumsy, who daily tumble lower as their undernourished or­ganisms fail to bear up under the work. In the end they die, either in the gas chamber or from an in­jection of phenol. Obviously this hierarchy does not include the masses of people killed immediately upon their arrival, i.e. the Jews, except for those who were single and especially fit for work. In his stories, Beta clearly defines his social position. He belonged to the caste of clever and healthy prisoners, and he brags about his cunning and agility. Life in a concentration camp requires constant alertness; every moment can decide one's life or death. In order to react appro­priately at all times, one must know where danger lies and how to escape it: sometimes by blind obedi­ence, sometimes by calculated negligence, some­times by blackmail or bribery.

[...]

"In the abundant literature of atrocity of the twentieth century, one rarely finds an account writ­ten from the point of view of an accessory to the crime. Authors are usually ashamed of this role. But collaboration is an empty word as applied to a con­centration camp. The machine is impersonal; respon­sibility shifts from those who carry out orders to those higher, always higher. Beta's stories about the "transport" should, I believe, be included in all an­thologies of literature dealing with the lot of man in totalitarian society, if ever such anthologies are compiled."

[...]

"Beta is a nihilist in his stories, but by that I do not mean that he is amoral. On the contrary, his nihilism results from an ethical passion, from dis­appointed love of the world and of humanity. He wants to go the limit in describing what he saw; he wants to depict with complete accuracy a world in which there is no longer any place for indignation. The human species is naked in his stories, stripped of those tendencies toward good which last only so long as the habit of civilization lasts. But the habit of civilization is fragile; a sudden change in circum­stances, and humanity reverts to its primeval sav­agery. How deluded are those respectable citizens who, striding along the streets of English or American cities, consider themselves men of virtue and goodness! Of course, it is easy to condemn a woman who would abandon her child in order to save her own life. This is a monstrous act. Yet a woman who, while reading on her comfortable sofa, judges her unfortunate sister should pause to consider whether fear would not be stronger than love within her, if she too were faced with horror. Perhaps it would, perhaps not -- who can foretell? But the "concentration universe" also contained many human beings who spurred themselves to the noblest acts, who died to protect others. None of them figure in Beta's stories. His attention is fixed not on man -- man is simply an animal that wants to live -but on "concentration society." Prisoners are ruled by a special ethic: it is permissible to harm others, provided they harm you first. Beyond this unwritten contract, every man saves himself as best he can. We would search in vain for pictures of human solidarity in Beta's book. The truth about his behavior in Auschwitz, according to his fellow-prisoners, is ut­terly different from what his stories would lead one to suppose; he acted heroically, and was a model of comradeship. But he wants to be tough; and he does not spare himself in his desire to observe soberly and impartially. He is afraid of lies; and it would be a lie to present himself as an observer who judged, when in reality he, though striving to preserve his in­tegrity, felt subjected to all the laws of degradation. As narrator, he endows himself with the qualities which pass as assets in a concentration camp: clever­ness and enterprise. Thanks to the element of "class" war between the weak and the strong, wherein he did not deviate from the truth, his stories are extraor­dinarily brutal."

Here, you can keep reading the rest of his story, including what I left out in the beginning.

I first heard this story being told by another man, through his voice. These were not words on a screen, they had come alive. He was a Polish man. He understood the horror.

"I have no way of knowing the inner-workings of his mind."

I appreciate Mello's honesty.

Yet...

"How deeply do I grasp my own mind?"

....of my own choice?

Is it in Action? Is it in Theory?

Perhaps both, in some ways.

I'll end with some commentary on the 45th passage of the Tao te Ching.

[mencnfire]

[Yo, I just want to drop in and spread some love too. I'm super glad that we became mutuals, you have really great taste in muses and you add so much depth to what we already know from canon. Your portrayal goes the extra mile and you really make it your own. I just wish that I had been able to help or do anything for you, so please don't hesitate to bop me when you need someone. You should not feel bad about needing time and space, too- People need to be more empathetic about grief. I really hope that we can continue to explore dynamics with our muses and create awesome threads together! And don't let random bullshit from haters get you down, you are not here for THEIR amusement. You continue doing what you love and enjoy it to your fullest when you can. Your enthusiasm and boundless passion is positively infectious and I'm glad I'm able to be here as a part of that.]

REBLOG THIS POST IF YOU WANT NICE AND POSITIVE ANONS IN YOUR INBOX! 💌

(( SODAAAAAAAAA. my sodie-pop owo

firstly, right back at you! i have enjoyed our conversations so much & find it so refreshing chatting to someone so down-to-earth / so willing to explore darker themes in a mature / responsible way. i love you & appreciate your honesty and just your general vibes. i feel very comfortable just throwing things at you dlsngksdngsl (legit can't wait to see jae and volgin be sickos together - i dont know if this meme is us or them but im putting it here for you to see lmao )

but also, you have helped me. i think, like a lot of others on here, you've helped just by chatting to me. writing with me. having fun with me. like, our dumb little convos (and the serious ones where we both get all antsy and ranty) have helped a lot because it's taken my mind off of things. it's weird because i'm in the stage of grief now where it feels random. like, sometimes i'll be chill and all's good and then suddenly it hits. it's been hard being so...temperamental? sensitive? i think i've felt the need to constantly apologise because i know that there are people who are like 'urgh how dare you post about irl stuff' - personally, i like knowing my mutuals. how they're feeling and what they're up to. i think it's good to be friends with people ( and its fine too if people dont wanna be! ) i've felt in such a confusing and strange place these last few months that my head's been jelly and i guess i've felt apologetic for that. i don't wanna scare people away by cracking up in those moments of sadness.

BUT ALSO, thank you soda. your words are real and they're kind and i take them to heart. writing my boys has helped a lot during this time ( even if my writing has been STINKY ) - kaz's grief has helped me with my own, keeping heid's heart problems has forced me not to censor dealing with that & looking at the others' sadness has given me a weird place to channel my own. i'm glad that like, my writing can be enjoyed by others ( i really hope it is ) because they help me a lot too and i enjoy doing it. i enjoy writing with everyone <3 ))

[thcdoomed]

reputation ? I see you and I'm just like THATS A GOOD PERSON, I LIKE THAT PERSON AND THEIR MUSES. TOP NOTCH. 11/10. AMAZING. but seriously you're just so great ; w ; as is dronia and your kassandra ♡ I love seeing you on my dash, I love talking to you. you are genuinely such a joy. just. *chefs kiss* never change. good bean right here, brewing the good stuff.

What's my reputation? What do you think when you see my URL? || accepting [🏹]

|| @shdwtouch

Awww thank you so much! I really enjoy talking to you too and I love Shade and Kaey, you have so much boundless creativity with your ocs and the design you put into them. You're such a positive spot on the dash that I really enjoy seeing.

[ofgentleresolve-a]

❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ !!

these are cute ferre thinks they should get some :D ( ft. mun positivity meme w/ anon )

❤️ - talk about one of your mutuals/partners and why you enjoy them and their blog!

first of all anon, you're so sweet, THANKS FOR LETTING ME GUSH ABOUT SOME OF MY WONDERFUL WRITING PARTNERS!!

first, i gotta start with LENA ( @mythvoiced ) who's so nice?? so sweet?? ngl when i first started following her, i didn't know someone could be that openly supportive of all her mutuals :'D but!! it's always a joy to see her on my dash; her enthusiasm and cheer is infectious and yet she's also very thoughtful of her mutuals...it's not often i see that kind of active caring and concern for her partners on this hellsite. that and she shows genuine curiosity and love for her partner's muses and i really really appreciate that about her <3 it makes writing and plotting with them such a joy!! but onto her writing tho!! her cast of characters are all distinct?? and also every single one of her bios are like detailed- i can get a very clear impression of each and every one of her characters just from reading their bio alone. i'm so excited about our interactions and already and not me also scheming to see how i can get my muses to interact with all of hers JFKLSDJF also her writing?? lemme kiss it, it's LYRICAL AND FLOWS WELL....i'd like to steal some for miself please!!

i don't think we talk enough about how sweet @etherealve is!! i absolutely adore how open they are about supporting their writing partners via commenting/liking their mutuals' posts. it really shows i think, the care and interest they put into their partners not just as writers but also as individuals. they're also very down-to-earth and super fun to watch them banter on dash with our mutuals...and i haven't even gotten to their writing yet. i really really love their ocs or at least the ones i've met!! jay, from what i've seen, is very balanced...like he might've had a rough childhood, he's not angsty. but he's also not completely naive either. he's someone who i don't think can be pinned down with one trope ( despite mana nicknaming him lover boy...sjdfklsj ) as we're already seeing he has multiple layers and sides that come out depending on who he's interacting with. i absolutely love what we have going so far writing wise and i can't wait to see where it goes!!

laney ( @guttersniper ) is also a darling to see on my dash!! they're super chill and friendly which is refreshing see in a space that can get cliquish...laney doesn't play by those rules though and i love how open they are to interacting with all kinds of muses!! but onto mutt, it's difficult and time-consuming to develop any character but to do it for a child muse especially on this hellsite?? that's amazing in and of itself. laney puts so much love and care into mutt's character and it shows. mutt is so realistic and i can tell laney put a lot of thought into how a child would realistically act especially considering the sheer amount of abuse and abandonment mutt has already endured...that and mutt in general?? so much fun to interact with and also so much fun to just watch exist?? and live?? nothing but respect and care for these two really!!

and last but certainly not least synnie ( @eternasci )!! synnie is an absolute joy to see on all my blogs and I'M SO HAPPY I GET TO INTERACT WITH THEM AND LUCI WITH MANA NOW TOO!! they were actually one of the first few people I started writing with when I initially came back to rpc and they were just so chill and sweet?? very reassuring for me since i was a nervous wreck back then sjdfklsjdf anyways, i love how while they are laid-back, they also go hard with character development for luci, sweet bird child who is just so, so wonderful?? first and foremost, i love luci's boundless optimism and their steadfast belief in assuming the best of people- but what really draws me to them is that their character arc puts that to the test and just, wow- that's a character to admire a lot!! but also synnie's writing- also gives it a chef's kiss- it's v lyrical and metaphorical as well, which is something i'd love to try out more in my own writing <3

[kazeofthemagun]

♛ - Alchemic-elric

Send me a url and I'll tell you the following:

@alchemic-elric

🔮 my opinion on;

character in general: Oh boi~ Ed is one of the most unique characters I've had the pleasure of getting to know. I enjoy the series he is from a whole lot - hell I just got the manga - and watched most of the animation available, aside from one of the movies. Edward Elric hits the comedy and badassery vibes splendidly. I also like how his personality isn't the stereotypical quiet "genius kid" - he is a whole explosive barrel of surprises with compelling character flaws. His color pallete is satisfying (because that plays a big role for me) and represents him very well. Ed is definitely up there among the chars I'd love to meet IRL, lol. He's a presence that inspires due respect, seeing as he had endured so much so early and even as a young teenager he's kicking ass left and right and is more capable than most adults - while still retaining flaws you would expect from a kid, helping to cast him in a more relatable light, even if it is hard to relate to the kid prodigy aspect itself. I love to see his growth throughout the series, as he makes his way through all the obstacles and trials life throws at him and his brother. ^^

how they play them: Kira plays Ed amazingly. For me, FMA is a fandom I follow on the side among other things, but I started chatting to the mun and followed, and started to read some of the stuff they write on the blog and I have to say? Honestly, when I think of Ed I think of yours. His speech patterns, (also, Ed is finally allowed to say the fuck word cuz it ain't monetized media lmao) his emotional complexity (researched so well btw), all the little tidbits that make sense in a canon perspective, like the explained workings of the automail, how it affects him and how he maintains it, the love of cooking much like the love of alchemy, gosh there's just so much, so much love poured into this muse, I know he's a huge part of your life and it shows. I know how it feels to have a fandom/character you are so passionate about, for me its obvs FFU and also God Eater but you're making me delve deeper into FMA again and appreciate it with this enhanced perspective now, which comes from hanging around your blog. As I said, your Ed now lives rent free in my head and that's what I see when I look at canon Ed now, lol. And that means YOU DID A DAMN GOOD JOB WOOOOO!

the mun: You're awesome, how tf do you write so much?? So many threads?? So many people! Ahh! Hahah, teach me. (jk on the teach part obvs - I'm just gushing about the amount of writing energy haha) Chatting to you is always fun, I love to see how excited you are about the fandom and your boi. I learned of you through Kumo and became interested in your main, which was a good choice to make and I get to enjoy writing scenarios from time to time and seeing this alchemy boi react. >:)) Also whenever Cloudy shows up and starts arguing with Windy I laugh out loud. I appreciate you throwing him at me sometimes, despite being involved in so. MUCH. STUFF. already like holy shit! XD I admire that. Both the boundless creativity and still interacting with followers unrelated to your main fandom. So much nice all around. Ty for being a fun part of the dash as always ;)

🔮 do i;

follow them: Yes!

rp with them: Not this blog

want to rp with them: Depends - I am always open but fandoms may not mesh too well. Characters may or may not. All in all am open to try but I'm perfectly good interacting OOC and with asks ^^

ship their character with mine: obviously not

🔮 what is my;

overall opinion: Very positive! I highly recommend @alchemic-elric to all my followers who'd like to look into the FMA fandom! :D