#everyone thinks lucifer is a shit dad but they're keeping their mouths shut to have a Peaceful Night at demon olive garden

[irregularbillcipher]

demon show is one of the biggest examples of a fanbase doing a lot of heavy lifting to play around with/explore premises that the show doesn't seem interested in, but are wildly entertaining

[etherealluminescence]

the brothers + the former undateables finding out buff cat has kittens that are visiting devildom, but unfortunately buff kittens are extremely chaotic little shits, mc + diavolo + barbatos + simeon + satan doesn't believe anyone when they say "I'm convinced they're pure evil and they bite" "no they baby"

buff cat Buff Cat BUFF CAT BUFFCATBUFFCA-

I was really excited to write this. I LOVE Buff Cat. This is just making me grin while thinking of writing it. Aaaaa I mean I couldn’t just not draw it either,, aha? ;)

This also works for Belphie and Luke, but I think Mammon sees the most of the cats because he likes MC and visits them, but is TERRIFIED. More buff cat memes at the bottom. Also warning very long.

Brothers and New Datables reaction to Buff Cat’s kittens!

Lucifer

As soon as MC left the kittens and him alone, chaos ensued. Within minutes, one of the kittens successful spat out a hairball on him, and another was about to break his desk. The third was on his bookshelf, biting the spine of his books.

He didn’t want to raise his voice at kittens, but he swore they were trying to antagonise him on purpose. Normal kittens do not act like this.

As soon as he caught one coating his paperwork in their saliva, he began to shout. This only backfired, as they truly did plan to beat the shit out of him.

He knew he couldn’t retaliate, or MC would be mad, and so would Diavolo. Also, he’s pretty sure that their dad would beat him up.

The kittens clawed up his shirt, broke his desk, ruined his paperwork, books, pens, and made him bleed. He tried his very best to put them in corners without hurting them, but they acted as though they were high on katnip and are professional murderers.

Needless to say, as soon as MC returned he was breathless and a mess. MC didn’t even notice, and told him thanks for playing with the kittens!! He was about to tell MC to keep their kittens on a leash when MC just said they’re so energetic at this age.

Energetic?? You mean that’s ENERGETIC? Not MURDEROUS INTENT?

Never wants to be near another buff kitten. What on earth happens during their adulthood that changes them from a chaotic shit to this otherworldly entity.

Mammon

Mammon was screeching for hours. Literally screaming they were out for his flesh, and can smell his fear.

They bit his ankles and even with the blood seeping from it, neither you or Satan believed the buff kittens did it.

You both laughed it off as him getting hurt, and went to take care of the kittens.

He swears they’re trying to kill him and sacrifice his very soul.

Also he’s never stealing from Diavolo again after they started staying there, and even began protecting the place.

Leviathan

He was fine with Buff Cat, so why not the kittens? They looked so well behaved like MC, so why not offer to look after them for a little bit, while everyone was at school? He doesn’t go in person so he doesn’t mind.

Ah what a big mistake that was.

These kittens are trying to break into his aquarium; quite literally. They just attempted to headbutt the glass and made running starts repeatedly, hoping it would crack.

As soon as he got them to stop doing that, they began to knaw at his wires, which he had to stop. When he got a headcount, there were only two, so where was the third?

SHIT! HIS RURI CHAN FIGURINES!

The third one was now biting off one of his limited addition Ruri chan’s arms, and Levi was getting pissed. He wasn’t sure what he’d tell MC, but he was ready to kick them out of his room.

He remembered buff cat, his good buddy, and tried to just watch over them a little longer. They were his kids, so he could just do him one favour.

Levi was screaming in regret when all his manga was ripped to shreds. All. Of. It. Nothing was spared, and Levi was ready to kick them out for real.

Until MC and Buff cat came in to take the kittens. Levi was going to scream out his frustrations, but just as he said “your”, a kitten bit his ankle causing him to silently scream and fall to the ground.

Concerned, you both ran up to him and tried to help him up, wondering what happened. One kitten however, walked behind you and put a paw to his neck and sliced. Afterwards, he did the I’m watching you motion.

Scared enough to almost piss his pants, Levi kept his mouth shut on the experience he had today, and probably tommorrow. After all, since it went so well he wouldn’t mind watching them this week while everyone attended classes, right?

Satan

Wherearethebabieswherewherewhere

He was so excited, and constantly babied them. He had all the cat toys, the best cat food, and became a sort of servant for them.

With just a meow or point he’d be off to get them whatever they wanted. Even if they bit his books or stole his clothes, he’d just go aweee!! They’re learning how to use their bodies as they grow.

Originally opposed to Diavolo keeping them, as he wanted them, but the royals was a much better choice for three growing kittens.

Constantly showers them with affection and tries to baby talk them. It sounds kind of creepy.

When his brothers try to bully or blame the kittens for something the kittens obviously did, he lectures and berates them on cat development and why they shouldn’t hurt their feelings.

Asmodeous

Screaming out of fear and anger. Asmo found the three kittens in the mess of his clothes in his room.

They were all ripping and shredding at his clothes, and when they noticed him proceeded to bite and scratch as his hair, attempting to rip it out.

He was screaming like he was being murdered, and running around the room for five minutes. Every time he tried to exit, one would block the door.

Sensing that their MC was coming, the three behaved and snuggled up to him, meowing and purring as if they were content.

When MC entered, they noticed the scene before them and smiled!! How cute!! The kittens were snuggling against Asmo.

Asmo was shrieking and explaining to you what had happened, and your kittens pretended to act asleep.

Upset by him framing them, you gave him an earful that if he ripped up his own clothes on accident, he shouldn’t blame the kittens!

To think Asmo was so irresponsible.

Beelzebub

He figured since Buff cat worked out, and these were his children, who were absolutely buff, they’d work out too right?

Oh yeah. They worked out how to absolutely destroy the entire gym in a matter of minutes.

They aggressively beat up every gym go-er and threw dumbbells everywhere. They wrecked the treadmills and other machines, and bit off the wires for the electrical side.

Within minutes, Beel and the kittens were kicked to the curve, and banned for life. The injured staff and people were taken care of by Lucifer’s credit card. He 100% believed the buff cats did it, but neither you or Satan did.

It was kind of frustrating how you taught demons randomly burst into pain or that possibly Beel did it, but he understood you wanted to protect the kittens.

He understood they were still young and energetic, so they weren’t as peaceful. He’s aware they’re chaotic and will not deny it, but he still takes care of them as occasionally let’s them teeth on his fingers, so they can grow strong, since he knows they’re just playing.

Belphegor

no No NO.

He does not want to be near the buff kittens. He’s barely able to approach Buff Cat, but buff kittens? No way.

These buff kittens terrify him more than buff cat, and that’s saying something. There are three chaotic pieces of shits running around, biting ankles and trying to claw at everything.

He runs to the attic, unless the buff kittens are there. If they are, he runs off into the unknown.

Diavolo

He was the one who approved of them visiting. As soon as he heard buff cat actually had kittens, he wanted to meet them. With Barbatos agreeing, Lucifer lost the battle.

Was so happy to have them. Had Barbatos prepare everything, and even spent a whole lot of money on jewelled collars and adorable outfits!

He let them have the best milk in devildom, and even allowed them to rest in his room during their stay. It was even better because Diavolo was recently asking Satan for cat recommendations, as he felt like having a cat to pet while working would be nice.

This is based off a chat. ^^.

You all, the five, agree that it’d be a fun idea for them to stay in the devildom, and they’d be close to buff cat too, it’s a win win. They could stay with the royals, while HOL has Buff Cat. Simeon couldn’t take any since Luke was terrified.

Diavolo 100% babied them, even more than you. Some say he looks big and a bit scarily buff, but he now posts on his devilgram pictures of him and the kittens, which has actually helped his approachable image.

Cat papi.

Barbatos

He was on board with the idea of meeting new baby buff cats. He does pretty well with kids, and wouldn’t mind seeing the babies of such a sophisticated cat.

He was delightedly when MC handed them to him, and told him they’d be gone for a bit. He properly fed them, changed their clothes, pet them, give them attention, and even told them stories of MC.

The kittens were constantly entertained, and purred in delight every time he approached them. They seemed patient and cute, but according to the other staff they were worse than actual demons.

Apparently they were the ones who broke the stuff in the hallway, and managed to get a password to a secret room and broke everything in it. Luckily for the kittens, Barbatos didn’t believe it.

I mean, how could three kittens that seem desperate for love that just want some warmth act so devilishly?

Happy to report to MC that nothing came up. Even if he did catch them in the act, it wouldn’t matter. He would think they’re just being a little playful or energetic.

Very delighted that they catch mice, and now that they live here he has three strong cats to protect his kitchen and the prince.

Solomon

This is great!! Now he knows that buff cats breed, can he dissect them?

He was attempting to catch one while the three were there, but these chaotic brats would not sit still. They were jumping from couch to shelves, knocking over all sorts of things.

When he finally got them in his room, they began knocking over all his potions and books, and even began to bite back. They hissed and smacked him with their tails, body slammed him, and tried to claw his eyes out.

He figured feeding them would calm them down, but they ended up breaking his plates as soon as they saw him attempt to cook, these kittens have good intuition.

They proceeded to break everything in the kitchen, and when you came in to check on the noise with Simeon, you saw your three little kittens covered in flour, and Solomon with a defeated look.

Solomon tried to explain, but he got lectured for trying to dissect your babies. You even yelled at him for making them so scared that they tried their hardest to escape him, and almost got hurt because of it.

10/10 thinks those things are little shits.

Simeon

He loves them!! He’s probably good with human children, but with buff kittens he’s amazingly good as well!!

The kittens were well behaved and allowed him to pet them, and curled up as he read them stories!!

He gives them their bottles of milk,, he makes sure they’re warm,, and he babies them!! Because they’re baby.

He gave off great dad energy, and even invited Luke or Solomon to play with them. Luke suddenly had to visit the grocery store and Solomon for some reason was nowhere to be found.

Simeon would love to babysit them again, and even asked if they would come over more often! He and Buff Cat will also share stories of the kittens from now on, because they’re so cute.

Luke

No.

He is not going NEAR them. If he’s terrified of buff cat as is, what makes you think he’s not going to be terrified of buff kittens?

The second he sees one of them act mischievously, he’s screaming for Simeon. However, he just watches Simeon laugh it off.

He’s going to stay in his room until those demon spawns disappear.

+ MC

You were so so happy. Buff Cat’s little kittens were visiting you in the devildom, and you were ecstatic.

When you saw the kittens, you cuddled each of them for twenty minutes straight. You peppered them with kisses and gave them tummy rubs.

The brothers watched in shock, and were slightly envious that you were cuddling the kittens.

You got up to stretch, and as soon as you did they ran around and tried to bite everyone in the vicinity, and after you sat back down, they curled up to you like nothing happened.

Luke was in the corner shaking from how he just witnessed a kitten attempt to bite off Asmo’s eyelash.

Everyone except the baby bunch suddenly felt chills up their backs. It was not going to be a good week.

——————-

Here’s some memes! I think it’d be pretty funny and great on the lore if the royals actually took in the buff kittens, and began to care for them. The cats are as chaotic as Diavolo, so Diavolo would probably take fault and say he must of influenced the cuties, who are just replicating what they see like babies do. Luke, Mammon, and Belphie will never visit again. The kittens will also protect the jewels.