#fembit

[beyond-the-rabbit-hole]

What if women??? What if??? Stephbit content pls!!!! (Also if you include Fembit my head will literally explode and it will kill me instantly)

Girls Night

Features: Fembit, Stephbit, Northstar Warnings: None

A girls night with Stephbit includes lots of things. Snacks, movies, caving in skulls, giggling over cat videos, but the best part is very clear;

Doing Northstar’s nails!

“We should do em’ red.” Stephbit mused, holding one of his hands. “It’ll look real nice… Actually, how about we do ours red too, let’s match.” She grinned.

“Oooh, That sounds fun!” Fembit sang out, picking up the little nail polish bottle.

Northstar wasn’t exactly there by choice, but he allowed this bullshit. If nothing else, it did bring a little amusement to the banal nature of the Skull when Loathesome was prancing about. “Do I have any say in this?”

“Nope!” “Absolutely not darling~”

“Mmh, figured as much. Well, if you insist on painting my nails red, then I am going to do your eyeshadow red.”

Fembit blinked, laughing lightly. “Pardon?”

“I have a daughter, I know how to do eyeshadow.”

“Well well, then by all means darling!”

Stephbit snickered, deciding to paint Fembit’s nails while Northstar did her eyeshadow. “Stay still, alright? I don’t wanna accidently spill this on the carpet, Loathesome will throw a hissy fit. Like he totally doesn’t drag corpses in here and smear god knows what on it or anything. No no, we must keep it pristine!”

The pair got to share a laugh, with Northstar doing his damn best not to fuck up Fembit’s eyeshadow. He doesn’t exactly want to meet the business end of whatever weapon she’s packing right now, be it a knife or otherwise. “Stop moving.”

“Make me!”

Northstar fell into what is commonly known as the ‘Dad deadpan’.

Fembit on the other hand, burst into another fit of giggles with Stephbit. “You’re making yourself look so old!” “Awww look at his frown lines!” “Did we upset you?” “Peepaw is mad!”

[violetcottontail]

AT LONG LAST, PART 2. I'M NEVER HIRING INTERNS AGAIN, THESE FUCKING IDIOTS DESTROYED THE AUDIO, SO YOU DON'T GET TO HEAR ANY OF THE BABY GETTING EATEN. DAMMIT.

- ♡

[bunnyclawsllc]

Girlqueen you got to fix your lighting! You live in a cave or something?!

OH I'M SORRY DARLING! WOULD YOU FIND MY EYEBALL COLLECTION MORE APPEALING IF I USED A RING LIGHT? YOUR LACK OF APPRECIATION FOR AMBIANCE IS PATHETIC. IF YOU WANT PERFECT AESTHETIC EYEBALL PICTURES, TAKE YOUR OWN <3

[ithungersforsomethingscarce]

OH HELLO THERE LITTLE BUG <3! I NEVER EXPECTED TO FIND YOU HERE OF ALL PLACES. IT SEEMS LIKE JUST YESTERDAY THAT I DECLINED A COMMISSION TO KILL YOU <3 NOT FOR PERSONAL REASONS, YOU JUST SEEMED LIKE A PAIN IN THE ASS TO DESTROY.

ANYHOW, I'D MUCH RATHER BE YOUR FRIEND THAN YOUR ENEMY... INTERESTED IN AN ALLIANCE?

- FEMBIT <3

WHO THE FUCK IS TRYING TO ASSASSINATE ME.

on a lighter note, sorry, i don't make alliances with women. they get on my nerves.

[mr-iterum]

Hey, you've been really helpful in the past, so I thought I should give you a heads up? Fembit's been spending a lot of time in the body recently, and it's kinda freaking me out? Something big is coming. I get that she doesn't seem like that bad of a threat to most people, but I know her. She's not going to stop until she's the only one left. Just please be careful.

-Evelyn

Ahhhh shit. I had a feeling something was coming, it's been too quiet recently. I saw the teeth and claws she posted, and all I could think was: "Oh great, another Habit bites the dust- Er- Habit." Something something, breaking the Habit.

It's kinda typical Habit behavior from what I've seen for Habits to they and be the last one standing, I'm very sorry that you have to deal with this shit too. All I can say is don't make any deals with your Habit- Well- Any more deals with her. There isn't a single Habit out there that isn't a manipulative, loophole finding bastard.

What you can do, for now at least, is keep track of who she's targeting. Watch for what kind of Habits she targets. You'll notice they'll start getting tougher over time. The day she takes out someone tougher than Showbit?

Worry.

[mushbasaid]

it happens

it is nothing to be a shamed of damnit

[bellechere]

Here's a pretty clear pic of my Fem!Gambit, taken on Saturday of C2E2! Costume by me, BelleChere, contact lenses by Samhain Contact Lenses, photo by @Strannik45 on Flickr. I didn't have the time to make my own trench coat, and the one I ordered online didn't arrive in time, so I had to borrow one. I felt like I was swimming in it, as it wasn't tailored to me, and felt like it was covering up all my hard work. So I just slung it over my shoulder. I do have a bo-staff, it's just leaning against the wall behind me. I'm looking forward to making a trench coat, and making a couple other small fixes, before getting a good photoshoot in this number!

[beyond-the-rabbit-hole]

*really tiny voice in the distance*

Hey can we hear more about northstar i rlly like im

Papa Bear

Features: Northstar, random sacrificial Habit, mention of Bonnie Warnings: Mild violence

Crunch!

“Fifth time this week.” Northstar grumbled, stomping through the skull of a Habit that had decided to trespass on his property. Having Bonnie… It made him a bit of a target. He hadn’t eaten her, so a lot of other Habits seemed to think that made him weak or something. Well, it’s not his fault this one decided to step on a bear trap. Hauling the Habit up over his shoulder, he shook his head a bit. Well, now he has to get this thing dealt with before Bonnie wakes up from her nap. He isn’t going to bring it in the house, so woodshed it is.

The other Habit was starting to wake back up, so he wasted no time in getting it restrained and unarmed. He watched it carefully, eyes narrowed in annoyance.

“Oh wow, you can’t even afford an attic? You’re pathetic!” The other Habit jeered, receiving a swift kick to the teeth from Northstar.

“Hold your tongue, vermin.”

“Oooh or what, you’re gonna cut it out?”

“No. I just put Bonnie down for a nap, and if you wake her, I’m not going to be happy.”

“Ha! You actually care about that thing? I can’t believe you didn’t eat her! You’ve gotta be the only Habit too weak to fuck up Evan’s life!”

Northstar paused, tilting his head to the side as he listened carefully. Ah… He can hear Bonnie crying faintly from inside the house. Well that’s not good. Looks like he won’t be having much fun with this Habit. “You woke up Bonnie.”

“Yeah, so? I’m gonna make you watch when I eat her-”

Crack!

One swift punch went straight through the Habit’s skull, and he didn’t heal this time. No, Northstar wouldn’t allow it. This Habit isn’t even good enough to eat. All he deserves is to join the legions of Habits buried in the backyard.

He’ll do good to grow a nice big oak tree for Bonnie.

Maybe he could build a tree fort for her in it when she’s older.

[violetcottontail]

WELL HERE'S PART 1, YOU'LL GET PART 2 WHEN THE EDITORS STOP FUCKING UNIONIZING EVERY TIME I TURN MY BACK

- ♡

PART TWO ADDED FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE.

- ♡

[beyond-the-rabbit-hole]

Marburg, Stephbit, and Fembit interaction pls??? I love women,,

Girls Night 2 - Triple Baka, aka None Pizza with Left Beef

Features: Stephbit, Marburg, Fembit Warnings: Blood, period jokes

“Hi, I’d like to place an order for delivery?”

Stephbit was already snickering, shushing Fembit and Marburg as she tried to make an order on the phone. It’s impossible, since what they’re doing is so stupid they can’t help but crack up.

“Yeah, same address as last time, I’d like to get a large pizza- Yeah- No toppings-” “Except beef!” “Shut it Marburg- Yeah, uh no cheese either. Yes I’m sure. No sauce, I want zero toppings on this… Except beef. Yes I understand what I’m ordering, just put the beef on the left side.”

Fembit wheezed, struggling to keep Marburg’s mouth covered so she wouldn’t start cackling.

“Yup, yup, I also want as many orders of garlic bread as you can sell me. All of them actually- Just gimmie everything you’ve got in stock.” Stephbit held back a giggle, twirling the phone cord around her finger. “I know what I’m ordering, it’s not a prank, I swear.”

“Tell them to send their delivery boy in a maid outfit!” “They’re not- They’re not gonna do that.” “Ask anyway!” Fembit chimed in with a huge grin, barely restraining Marburg to keep her from laughing. “Yeah, uh, for special delivery instructions, any chance you could send the delivery boy in a maid outfit? We’ll tip really high for that.” Stephbit snickered a bit, shaking her head. “I don’t think they’re gonna do it.” “Awww.” “But there’s always a chance.”

Marburg finally managed to slip free, letting out a loud, howling laugh that Stephbit was positive the poor guy on the other end of the phone heard, no matter how much she tried to shield the phone from her cackles. “Fembit, silence the wench!”

“I’m trying, but she’s all slippery!” “Oh gross, she’s gonna get blood on the carpet.” Stephbit snickered, shaking her head. It’s not like any of them really care about blood in the carpet, it’s more about the principle of it. You don’t just bleed all over the place when someone invites you over, that’s rude.

“Pizza will be here in ten, we gotta clean this shit up.” Stephbit chuckled as she hung up the phone, looking over at Marburg. “You really gotta get that hemorrhaging under control, maybe dial it back to once a month like the rest of us?” “I don’t ask you to hold it in when you’re on your period.” She snarked right back, much to Fembit’s amusement. “Oooh, the girls are fightiiiiiing~!” “Not helping.”

[bunnyclawsllc]

Thoughts on lollipop chainsaw?

WHY WOULD I PLAY A GAME ABOUT KILLING ZOMBIES WITH A CHAINSAW WHEN I GET PAID TO DO THAT IN REAL LIFE? I SUPPOSE I CAN SEE THE APPEAL IT MIGHT HAVE FOR YOU POOR DEFENSELESS BUNNIES THOUGH <3

[bunnyclawsllc]

Hello, I have to admit that you are a very kind and intelligent lady, pleasure to meet you.

As far as I'm aware you're different than the others. That's nice, uniqueness is a wonderful trait. I think an alliance benefits us both, don't you think?

I'll keep you safe and maybe I'll need your help sometime with some celestial pests.

-Ms. Irmi, a deity⚔️

OH HELLO THERE DARLING! WHAT A SWEET MESSAGE <3 I'D ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO FORM AN ALLIANCE WITH YOU! I LOOK FORWARD TO ADDING THE EYES OF YOUR LITTLE CELESTIAL PESTS TO MY COLLECTION <3

[bunnyclawsllc]

Look, I know your rules say no dogshit entities, but this table is really ruining my fucking life PLEASE HELP ME

MY DEAREST RABBIT, IF YOU MAKE ME COME TO YOUR HOUSE JUST TO BEAT UP A PIECE OF FURNITURE, I MIGHT BE BORED ENOUGH TO FIND AN ALTERNATIVE SOURCE OF ENTERTAINMENT, NAMELY, YOU. MAKING A BRAND NEW HAUNTED TABLE FROM YOUR CORPSE SEEMS LIKE A LOVELY HOME IMPROVEMENT PROJECT!

BEST WISHES! AND GOOD LUCK NOT DYING TO A FUCKING INANIMATE OBJECT YOU PATHETIC LITTLE BUNNY BRAT <3

[bunnyclawsllc]

Hi.

Bring me Fairmount's head on a plate and I'll give you WHATEVER your heart desires.

-an old friend

OH? INTERESTING OFFER DARLING, BUT YOU SHOULDN'T MAKE PROMISES YOU CAN'T FOLLOW THROUGH ON. OFFERING A HABIT WHATEVER HER HEART DESIRES IS LIKE VOLUNTEERING TO FILL A BLACK HOLE! AND BESIDES, I ALREADY HAVE PLANS FOR FAIRMOUNT <3

[bunnyclawsllc]

SWEETPEA, I NEED A FAVOR. TURNS OUT MY MOST RECENT GUESTS ARE... QUITE THE EXCELLENT TRIO OF ESCAPE ARTISTS. IF YOU CAN TRACK THEM DOWN, YOU CAN KEEP ONE OF THEM FOR YOUR COLLECTION.

- ♡

OH? I'M INTERESTED! LET'S MEET UP TO DISCUSS THE DETAILS <3

[bunnyclawsllc]

woahhhrhjthgjggdnfv

yes yep absolutely yes i can do that mhm deal

im very good at that i think

i'd be honored :]

- 🥀

WELL AREN'T YOU A GOOD LITTLE BUNNY <3? I WISH MORE HUMANS WERE AS CLEVER AS YOU... THEIR LOSS, I SUPPOSE <3