#filledelaville

[filledelaville]

1 Although

2 I could save some pain

1 By cushioning the blow

1 On my overworked toes

3 I’ll always choose

2 En Pointe in ballet

3 To never pad my shoes

3 It’s what I do

4 Just simply endure

2 Even with callouses today

4 I'm still completely sure

4 I’d much rather feel the floor

[filledelaville]

Comparably,

Planet Earth

Is simply

A scribble on the

Big Black Board

That is the Universe.

—

Planet Earth is Home to

Love

And Life and

All that It brings.

In the grand scheme

Of Things.

—

The Big Bang was

Merely

Another delivery

Room hosting the Birth

of a Baby

That would grow up to be

The whole world

For Some.

For me.

—

Planet Earth has revolved Around The Sun.

With so many others

In the Milky Way.

Another just seemingly

Not unique.

But I believe

Planet Earth deserves

To see

—

Way more

Than 365 days

Around

Some hot head

So fuckin’ far away.

—

Planet Earth could affect

The Whole Universe

With its Gravity.

Every

Universe

Conceivable.

And not.

—

I believed in Planet Earth.

One day, it

Will get it All.

And All will be

Better off

With Planet Earth

Being the One

—

It

All

Revolves

Around

—

Planet Earth.

—

Except for

The Moon.

Planet Earth’s Moon.

The only body in Orbit

While Planet Earth was just

A Speck.

— Compromsing Orbits

[filledelaville]

Ode To My Lover Who Doesn’t Hurt Me

Well, they do

But we work through

There’s no abuse

Or mistruths

Only love

And the mistakes of two

People who are still new

To this concept of growing

On our own

While also

Forcing the other to bloom

[filledelaville]

I was mostly afraid of the similarities

When you hurt, I won’t take away the pain. I am no medicine. My words will never drip like morphine. From my lip, That won’t kiss away your scars. This is no experimental trial, To suppress your demons like cancer cells. My heart is no xanax bar. I won’t calm your anxious mind. I won’t focus you, Like Ritalin. You won’t be addicted to my security. You won’t overdose on my comfort. There will be no detox for my memory, Or rehab for my touch. Though I won’t be your cure, I will love you. I won’t promise to fix you Because you’re not broken. I won’t say I complete you Because on your own you are whole. You are human, We are both only human. This is different.

[filledelaville]

Hey. I’ve tried writing about you in 738292 different ways and I’ve all but given up hope so now what you get is my messy leftover 2 am ramblings I’ll probably never show you this because you deserve much better You deserve way better Than this than me And I guess that’s what I’m scared of I’m scared of a lot when it comes to you Scared you’ll leave scared you’ll lie scared you’ll get bored scared you’ll die This isn’t much of a love poem huh? But I guess the beauty behind that is that what I’m scared of most is losing you In any sense of the word I think the reason I find it so hard to get my feelings for you on paper Is because you invoke so much inside me I’m in love and terrified and enticed and ticked off and hesitant yet rushed with a great big dollop of overwhelmed on top I don’t understand my feelings for you and that’s not necessarily bad Bad for my artwork maybe For us ? Nope You just keep me guessing but also make me feel more sure than I’ve ever been in anything It’s such a paradox, my love for you I just can’t put it in words I want to say so much it’s like word vomit Completely Uncalculated I can neither formulate an understanding nor a comparison to describe you Us This But what I sure as hell can do is feel it And I hope that’s enough for you I hope you feel it too I hope you never leave, never change You frustrate me The side of me that insists on having all the answers of defining everything of understanding and concluding and therefore-ing Look at me all science method-y You’re already rubbing off on me I don’t want to figure you out Us out This out I just wanna feel you Feel it I love you Do you feel it too?

[filledelaville]

Your voice is honey Drizzled in my camomile tea Your lips are the only sweet Treat I’ll ever need Your tongue is the strongest Aphrodisiac I’ve known Your teeth, my tattoo artist Your smile is my home

[filledelaville]

[filledelaville]

"Just give yourself some closure. What would you say to him if he was standing right here in front of you for the last time?”

“There’s never going to be enough closure,” she replies. “I’d tell him I love him. I’d tell him I miss him because I do, but I’m not sure. How could I miss something that I still to this day can’t understand? I’d tell him I convince myself I could hate him for everything he did wrong and every wrong thing I was too blinded to see. I’d want tell him that he can never repay me for everything he took from me but as soon as I’d open my mouth to speak every argument I could possibly make seems irrational and I’m embarrassed. I’d feel ridiculous for even thinking bad of him. I’d apologize for all of it and plead with him to fix me. I’d tell him how he made my heart flutter and how no one could ever make me feel the same. Then I’d tell him I love him.

I’d tell him how much I thank him for always being there because for a long time, he was the only reason I woke up in the morning. I’d tell him how amazing he was and how I know that because I made him that way just like how he made me, me. I’d tell him that he made me strong and showed me that I’m beautiful. I’d tell him that I’m okay now and that it’s all because of him. It’s all because of him. I’d tell him painstakingly that he still carries my heart with him. I’d tell him no matter what he says I know what he thinks of me and I wish I could change that but that’s not my issue anymore, that’s not my power to have anymore. I’d tell him how scary this is, how I’m so so scared baby. Then I’d tell him I love him.

I’d tell him to remember the little things I said and not to be afraid to love again. I’d tell him I hope he’s not falling into old habits I’d beg him to take care of himself, be happy. I’d tell him everything I could think of. I’d tell him everything because I know he always cared. I’d want to tell him that it would all be okay and I’d always be there but I couldn’t. Up would come that ridiculous feeling, the pride. But who cares, that’s not what this is. I’d tell him that he is the best thing to have ever happened to me and that I don’t believe in regret. And how, at the same time, I do and I don’t hope I soon forget this. I’d tell him that things would be hard and that I’m so sorry even though it’s no ones fault. I could never say enough so I’d break one last time. Then I’d tell him I loved him.”

[filledelaville]

Twisted Hymn I sing of praise to a crooked faith Leave me crazed, each breath intakes The will to – yes, love me better a mess I wept I breed new concept, yet bleed old testaments My heart bestowed and hung from rosaries Beseeched with blasphemy by every soul close to me Indoctrinated with wayward Sunday school teaching Manipulated while radically believing Blindly now, I hail my deity steadfast Hatefully drown in the purity of dead past Draped in sin, I fear only abandonment I, loyalest follower, doubts the very commandments So help me, my God, silence thine twisted hymn I’m atheistic to love and it’s all because of him ..

[filledelaville]

I couldn’t let you go tonight…I know I’d be miserable without you…without you, there wouldn’t be. You’ve made me into the person I am.

Hymn

[filledelaville]

Stop for a second… Just take a moment to think about the last time you were happy. Now, I don’t mean when you had a good time at that party or bought that new lipstick. No; I mean genuinely, freely, and whole-heartedly happy.

…eye opening, right?

[filledelaville]

Anyone can dance; True, quite simply. But when you experience a kind of losing yourself that is exactly like being found… Only then, are you a dancer; raw, broken, and stitched. Merely an accompaniment, laced to create something beautiful.

My aching feet and restless soul - how they bargain for definition…

[filledelaville]

“Fille de la ville” My rough (wannabe-fluent) French translation of “city girl”… Not sure who owns the original sketch but the edit w/ text is mine ® I’m new to tumblr guys and umm haven’t exactly figured out all the tricks yet, but this blog should be pretty cool. I really wanna give it like that cliche aesthetic NYC vibe. Poetry, artwork, videos, the works ya know ? So yeah.. follow if you want and please be patient with me ! Promise it’ll be pretty cool or at the least, visually pleasing.. ~ Rae®