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Yknow maybe it’s not a good thing to have kids with a ten year+ difference between them.
#vent#just. a lot of realizing stuff that has been gnawing at my brain for a while#for those who dont know all kf my siblings are like over 19 years older than i am#which at face value isn’t inherently the issue#but it starts digging in that out of all of my sisters#im the odd one out#because im the youngest#and it always felt like they were less my sisters and more extra parents#treating me more like one of their own children than their sister#and at first it didn’t bother me/i didn’t care enough to be bothered#but now its just#im 21. i wanna be apart of the in group#i wanna get to relate to my sisters because now im an adult and im on their level#but im still not#im still just this weird awkward little girl#and its frustrating#knowing that they dont take me seriously#that im not#idk sister enough because i was born much later than they were#and my dad being always irritated by the fact that he has to come pick me up from college#and how he never acts this way if we go visit the girls (same amount of travel time)#doesnt help the alienating feeling at all lmao#i think the straw that broke me was the fact that they all have a groupchat#my dad and my three sisters#but never was I included or even asked about it#idk. maybe im thinking too hard about this but its just like#i want to belong. what do i need to do to belong.#what is wrong with me that I can’t be seen as an equal as their sister too#its#hard
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