#fucktard ex-husband

[smutty-books]

Hoodie Guy

Chapter 5

Eminem x reader

Getting to know you, coffee shop, soft marshall matters, reader’s sons

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The rest of the day passes in a blur. Angie teased you about Marshall and tried to get info out of you but you remained closed lip about what you talked about. You headed home in time to meet your sons’ buses and started them on their homework while starting dinner. Your 16 year old was determined to antagonize his brother and Nick played into it. You were glad for the distraction from your thoughts about meeting Marshall later. Soon enough you had your 12-year-old put to bed and Andrew was studying for an upcoming test. You looked at the time and realized you needed to get ready. You quickly went to your room, slipped into some straight-legged jeans, some white air force 1’s and a V-neck long-sleeved shirt. You let your hair down and fluffed it,and touched up your makeup. You spritzed some musk on your pulse points, the crown of your head, and behind your knees. You grabbed your debit card, some cash, and your phone. You let Andrew know you were going out with a friend. Andrew rolled his eyes when you repeated the exact instructions to him that you told him every night.

“ I know, mom, you tell me the same thing everytime you go out.” You kissed him on the too of the head and told him bye and what time you’d be back. You headed out, locking the door behind you. You drove to the coffee shop near the gym and parked. You took a few deep breaths and reminded yourself this was just Marshall and you were having coffee and talking, that's all. It didn't help that you had not dated much since your divorce and the times you had ended badly. You weren't one for casual hookups, and most guys wanted sex. That's what you worried about with Marshall, and, if you did date, what his expectations were cause you knew he was experienced with women. Way more experienced. You and your ex-husband had a good sex life and had done some experimenting, but you knew Marshall had been pretty wild in his younger days. You didn't know about it now, but if he was his team must be keeping it pretty hush-hush, as Marshall was very private.

You shook those thoughts off and reminded yourself that you were just talking and getting to know each other. Usually, things didn't progress past that. Most guys you were into were interested initially but then friend-zoned you, which is kind of what you were expecting to happen with Marshall. You would be cool with that. Marshall as a friend was better than no Marshall at all.

You again chided yourself for getting ahead of yourself. You checked again to make sure you had your debit card and your cash. You stepped out of your little car, ensured she was locked and made your way to the door. You glanced inside and noticed Marshall wasn't there yet. You look at your watch and see you are early, so you debate whether or not to wait outside or to go inside.

The smell of fresh coffee as a patron came out of the shop made up your mind for you. Coffee fiend that you were You followed the scent of the beloved liquid. You approached the counter and greeted the cashier. You scanned the menu but couldn’t decide. Ypu asked the cashier for a recommendation. The barista happened to hear your question and came over and asked you what you liked. You told her you liked dark roasts like Cafe Bustelo, a Cuban espresso, but you also like your cafe mochas and peppermint mochas as well as chai tea lattes. She offered her suggestion which sounded heavenly to you so you requested that and thanked her for her help and input. She smiled at you and began preparing your coffee in a mug. You paid the cashier for your drink and put a 5 dollar tip in the tip jar. You made small talk with the barista as you watched her prepare your drink. After a lovely conversation, she handed you your coffee creation in a big mug. You were delighted by the foam decoration on the top and told the barista so. She smiled appreciatively and blushed a little. Thanking her again, you turned around to find a table and found Marshall watching you. His face was expressionless but his gaze was warm and affectionate after watching your interactions with the staff at the shop. You blushed a little and ducked your head at his scrutiny . He swallowed down a smile and moved to join you.

“ I see you made yourself at home.. Ypu weren’t waiting long, were ya’?” He greeted you with as he came to your side. You smiled at him as you both walked to a both toward the back. You let him guide where you sat. You automatically took the seat that your back faced the shop, he looked a little surprised but nodded in thanks and took the seat facing the shop. He watched you take a sip of your drink and then swallowed another smile as you closed your eyes and sighed in contentment, dropping your head back. You smiled sheepishly as you brought your head back up and found his blue gaze still resting on ypu, cataloging your expressions, a slight tilt to his lips.

“ What can I say? Coffee and I could never be strangers. A patron came out as I was waiting outside for you, and I couldn’t resist coming in and getting a cup. I hope you don’t mind?” your explanation started strong but trailed off as you waited for his response.

“ Yes, I minded. I fully ‘spected you to wait outside for me. I’m Eminem, I expect chicks to wait for me.” He said, wholly deadpan and seriously, sitting toward you and looking you straight in the eye. Your eyes widened a fraction as you looked in his serious blue eyes and scanned his face. You thought he was playing but his face was so serious. Your mind flashed to all the interviews you saw with him and his complete deadpan delivery and his dry sense of humor. You decided to play with it a little. You made sure an apology showed in your eyes just in case.

“ Oh, so sorry, my mistake. Where ever are my manners. Please for give the lapse in etiquette, Mr. Mathers. It won’t happen again.” Ypu intoned, dryly, your face in an exaggerated forgive me expression, complete with puppy dog eyes. Marshall broke at that. His blue eyes twinkled back at you and he allowed a smile and a chuckle.

“ Well, since it’s your first time, I’ll let it slide. Don’t let it happen again.” He mock warned. You tried to appear chastened though in actuality you were relieved he was being facetious. You murmured your thanks and picked up your mug and took another sip. Marshall excused himself to get his own drink. You turned around to watch him move across the shop, admiring his easy stride and his outfit. You admired his black Kangol cap, his black zip up hoodie and his sagged sweatpants and his Nike’s. You watched him interact with the cashier and watched him drop a 10 dollar tip in the jar. You continued to watch as he accepted his cup and as he turned around and moved back toward you. You turned around back toward the table not wanting to be caught staring like a creeper. You watched as he settled himself in and took a sip of his drink.

“Have you been here before?” Ypu asked him curiously, taking another sip from your mug.

“ Not this shop, no, I used to frequent the shop it was before. It was a little mom and pop greasy spoon. Made the best eggs and hash browns. They had to sell though, the owner got sick and they couldn’t keep up the business. This place hadn’t been open maybe 6 months. First time I’ve been in here.” He looked around the shop assessing.

“ Yeah, we have a place like that back in my hometown. It was called The City Grill. Only open till like 2 and made the best eggs and hash browns. It’s still there though. Little mom and pop hole in the wall place.” You shared, smiling slightly at the fond memories.

“ So you ain’t from Detroit. I didn’t think you was. Your accent is different. Where’s home?” He asked curiously. You told him where you were from and about your little hometown.

“ What brought you to Detroit? That’s a ways from home?”

“ I took a travel assignment here one summer. I kept coming back here each summer cause I love the hospital and the staff I work with so much. Plus I fell in love with Detroit. So I decided to move me and my boys here permanently.”

From there the conversation continued. Marshall was guarded about quite a bit but he answered more than you thought he would. You were also guarded about some of your history but tried to answer as openly as you could. He asked more questions about your kids and you bragged on them like the proud mama you were. You asked about his kids as that was never an area you delved into or investigated as those were his kids. You could see how proud he was of all three of his kids. You commiserated over your worry about your teenagers and how things had changed since you both were that age.

You were just chuckling at an anecdote he was telling about Stevie when ypu heard “ Mom, mom, mom, mummy, mama.” Marshall looked at you confused, realization dawned as you took your phone out with a chuckle. Murmuring an “ excuse me” you turned away slightly to focus on your conversation with your son. Marshall pulled his phone out so as not to eavesdrop on your conversation.

“ Hey, sweetheart, is everything okay? Is Nick okay?” You asked, concerned mom tone coming out. You heard an exasperated sigh from the end of the line.

“ He’s fine, mom, still sleeping. Can Jayden come over after school to hang out and listen to music? There's a new X album of unreleased songs dropping at midnight.” you thought about it. “ Has he checked with his parents that its okay?” “ Yes, mom, they said it fine.” “Is he staying for dinner? “ “ If that's okay, yeah.” “ Yeah, that's fine.” “ Bet! Thanks mom, love you, bye.” “ Love you, too, son, be home soon.”

Marshall looked up and put his phone away as you ended your call. He smiled to himself as he caught your concerned mom tone and hearing your tone when talking to your son, and the “ I love you too.”

“ Your boys okay?” He asked politely, even though he knew the answer.

“ Yeah. That was Andrew, asking to have a friend over tommorow to listen to a new album that’s dropping at midnight.” You explained, pocketing your phone.

“ Oh? What album?” Marshall asked curiously, thinking if he knew any albums on the horizon off hand.

“ Xxxtentation? It’s some of the unreleased music he did before he died.” you explained. Marshall nodded “ Your son into rap?” “ Predominantly, yeah, he started with you and then went from there. His favorites are X, Juice World, and NF, but he listens to so many artists.” you chuckled.” He likes to play them for me when Nick’s not around and get my opinion on what he is listening to.” you shared, chuckling, shaking your head, thinking about some of the screamers he listens to. Marshall chuckled as well. “ Sone of it though he just wants to hear me say” Andrew!!!!” others he says “ Mom this beat is fire, you gotta listen to it!” “ Mom, listen to these lyrics!” “ Mom, listen to this flow switch, listen to the rhyme scheme.” You shrugged. “ I'm glad he wants to share what he's listening to with me, though, keeps the lines of communication open.” Marshall nods thoughtfully, listening to you talk. You could see the wheels turning in his amazing mind.

“ You divorced, right?” you nodded, waiting for him to continue. He seemed to think like he was measuring his words. “Where their dad at? He in the picture? They get to see him?” You chuckled but it didn't have an humor in it. Marshall cocked his head and waited for you to continue. You thought about what to tell him.

“ Their dad lives in Arizona, before that Virginia, and before that Leavenworth. He was active duty while at Leavenworth, then retired. Did his 20 and got out. When he retired they moved to Virginia where he got a job as a DOD contractor. “ you told Marshall quietly. “ They see him a couple times a year. Andrew talks to him on FaceTime about once a month. Nick doesn’t know his dad or his new family that well.” As you talked , you kept your voice even and calm even though it still pissed you off. You looked at Marshall and saw the upset on his face. He swallowed a few times and you could see he was confused and upset. After a few tries he was able to speak.

“New family?” He asked, his voice controlled.

“ Yeah, he started seeing someone when we were separated, made it serious after we divorced and the when he came back to the states he moved her to Leavenworth with him and they got married. She had a son from a previous marriage. They had a daughter together a few years later even though she wasn’t supposed to be able to get pregnant. Of course this was after they told Andrew they didn’t have room for him when he asked to live with his dad.” You told him, your voice shaking a bit and you took a deep breath.

“ Motherfucker. So he chose a bitch and her kid over his own kids???!!!” He looked incensed at the idea. You bit your lip, and looked down, and nodded. You heard him muttering under his breath “ I see why you called him a fucktard. I just don’t get how a father can not be involved in his kid’s lives or choose one family over the other. That’s fucked up.” He told you after a few minutes, his voice calmer and quieter. You looked up and saw his gazing at you. You still saw anger on his face directed at your ex but in his eyes you saw sympathy. You wanted to get away from the unpleasant topic so quickly changed the subject. Marshall sent you a look that let you know he knew what you were doing but was going to follow your lead, for now, which you were grateful for.

“ So, you box, like for real. How long have you been boxing? How did you get started?” you asked him, intrigued. He smiled a little bit, chuckled, and answered your questions. You laughed as he finished with the story about being beaten by the 14-year-old. He shook his head and watched you laugh.

“Have you ever taught anyone to box?” you asked, curious. He shook his head. “ I tried to teach my girls, but none of ‘em got interested.” he imparted.

“ Yeah, my son used to go to a boxing club back home but stopped, never really said why. I always thought it would neat to learn, just never had the time.”

“ I could teach you, I mean, I can try to teach you, if you want.” he offered.

“ I don't know if I want to subject you to that. I'm incredibly uncoordinated and boxing looks like it requires coordination,” you said self-deprecating. “ Thank you for the offer, though, can I rain check and take you up on it later?” you asked tentatively, raiding you eyes to meet his blue gaze head on. The compassion and understanding in his blue eyes in his blues took your breath away. You realized that you could easily fall for this human being and you needed to protect your heart if you didn't want it broken. He considered you for a few minutes.

“ Raincheck it is. Imma hold you to that. So I know you got good taste in music cause you listen to me.” he said, smirking at you, you chuckled. “ What other artists you listen to?”

“ Oh, buddy, you just opened a flood gate with that question.” you warned him.

“ Hit me. I wanna know. Is it all rap or do you like other types of music?” he asked, curiously, hid gaze intent on you. You weren't used to such attention and part of you blossomed but the other part was waiting for him to put the breaks on and friend-zone you. You took a deep breath and thought for a moment.

“ Imma be honest, I grew up listening to 8 tracks and records on my parents Hi- fi. I grew up with classic country, 50’s, 60’s, and 70’s music. My parents got me a record player for one of my birthdays, one of those that had a tape deck as well? So I grew up listening to all their old records. Then I was a band geek, and a theatre geek. The band guys were into heavy metal band and garage bands so I have an appreciation for that. And I loved early rap, like the 80’s and early ’90s. Loved the Beasty Boys, MC Hammer, and Regulator by Nate Dogg and Warren G. And of course DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince. Salt n’ Peppa, Run DMC. Then when I got married my then husband listened to a lot of 80’s hair and and classic rock as well as classical music and some show tunes. I got away from rap because it was too violent and too vulgar and misogynistic. It wasn't fun like the early rap I listened to. Plus my then husband wasn't a fan so that influenced my listening tastes. It wasn't till after I was divorced and my middle son started bumping rap and playing it for me that I got interested in the genre again. Then I became obsessed and devoured everything I could about hip hop and the culture. As you said in “ Kamikaze,” it made me feel strong at one of the weakest points in my life, and the more I listened, the more strength I drew from you and other hip-hop artists the more I sought to understand the culture and why rappers rapped about what they did. That's the beauty of music, it is universal and it’s a way of connecting to others and telling your struggles that others can relate to and maybe gain strength from the fact that someone else is struggling and you aren't alone in this world. That there are others that do understand and its a comfort and a solace.”you told him, gauging his expression. He listened intently and nodded at points, made agreeing noises at others and didn't look surprised by you statements about rap and why you got away from it. He looked a little sad at that but perked up when you talked about your renewed interest in it and watched, intrigued by the passionate way you spoke about this art form and culture that he was in love with so much and that had given so much to him and his family. That he strove to give back to and pay homage to whenever and however he possibly could. He found himself wanting to know more which was an oddity. He was saddened when he saw you look at your watch and start and knew you had to go.

“ You gotta go?” he asked quietly, looking down at his drink

“Yeah, I told my son I’d be back around 10:30,” you told him regretfully, finishing your now very cold cup of coffee. You moved to stand up and return your cup. He stood up as well and grabbed his drink and took yours from you despite your protest. He quickly silenced your protest with a warning look. You smiled at him in thanks. You thanked the cashier and barista and made your way to the door. He helped the for open for you, which you thanked him for. You talked and joked with each others. He walked you to your car. He watched as you unlocked your car and as you quickly checked the back seat before he opened the door and held it.

“ I’d like to see you again. “ he told you seriously. You looked him, confused. He clarified. “ I mean, I know we are going to see each other at the gym, but I'd like to, you know, kinda like take you out.” he got out. You looked up at him and smiled warmly.

“ Yeah?” You asked in wonder. He smiled at that, more certain at your humbleness that he wanted to get to know you more.

“ Yeah, I do.” he breathed, looking at you.

“ I'd like that, too. I kind of like you, Marshall Mathers.” you said sweetly, bashfully, blush on your cheeks as you admitted that to him. He leaned down and brushed a kiss to your cheek and whispered in your ear, his voice husky: “ Yeah? Wanna know sumtin'? I kind of like you too, y/n.” he felt you shiver as his lips brushed across your skin, and he bit back a smile, liking that he could affect you like that. He pulled back and gave you a small smile. You smiled shyly up at him, hardly believing someone like him was interested in someone like you.

“ Good night, Marshall. See you tomorrow night? “ you asked, starting your car, smiling as her engine came to life. He murmured his assent and closed your door. You rolled your window down

“ Sleep tight, sweet dreams, Marshall Bruce Mathers.” you told him, smiling at him.

“ You, too, y/n, you too. Text me when you get home.” he reminded you. You nodded and waved at him as you rolled up your window. He smiled as he caught Tupac’s “ I Ain't Mad Atcha” coming from your speakers before the window closed. He watched as you pulled away then made his way to his vehicle and made his way home.

[imaginedreamwrite]

Fuck around and find out:

I just wanna see sweet snowbird completely losing it towards Curtis ex wife as she shows up out of nowhere at their farm and demands that half of it is hers. Snowbird tells her off, meets every comment made towards her with a retort that stings so much worse and to top it off she sends her a pile of cow poop a few weeks later. Curtis doesn't get a single word in while his ex wife is there and they never hear from her again after that.

The woman coming up the drive could have once been described as beautiful, stunning even, if it hadn’t been for the overuse of Botox and cosmetic surgeries to make her appear younger and more youthful. She had appeared randomly on the farm in a rented SUV with platinum hubcaps that had been marked with dust from the road, though the vehicle had parked far enough away from the house to make her have to walk.

“Curtis-“

“Mrs. Everett,” one of the hands had stood before you could, holding a hand out to you to ease you back against the porch swing, “let me handle this, ma’am.”

You could hear Curtis inside shuffling around, he was busy in the kitchen making you tea and likely had no idea what was going on. The hand who was departing the porch, Scott, had already headed down to meet the woman while you settled back on the swing.

You rest a hand on your belly, inhaling and exhaling slowly, your baby’s quickening drawing your attention momentarily. You were already 17 weeks and hormonal more often than not, though no one had ever bade you ire for your symptoms.

“My ex-husband! My ex-husband is hiding-” your ears perked at the sound of her voice and you started to stand just as the door had opened and Curtis joined you on the porch.

“Sweetheart, go back inside.” Curtis had tried to urge you inside, his eyes hardened and unwelcoming.

“You! You owe me half of what you’ve built! You owe me so damn much and you’ve done nothing-“ she started toward Curtis, her finger pointed at him as she screamed shrilly.

“Go home, Trish. Get back in your vehicle and go home.” Curtis had held his arm out to protect you, to shield you from going further. “Leave me and my wife alone.”

“That whore-!” She raised her hand again, point her finger toward you.

“Whore?” You stepped around Curtis and smacked her hand out of your face, your pregnancy hormones stirring your primordial urge to fling her off a cliff. “You show up on my property like some decrepit crypt-keeper and call me a whore?”

“Your property? This rightfully belongs to me! Half of it is mine!” She shrieked, her voice aggravating and testing. “Curtis you fool-!”

“You’re divorced you absolute fucktard!” You stepped toward the woman, your ire and your anger turning animalistic. “In case you haven’t forgotten, you are no longer married, and you signed a prenup which you insisted on.”

“I did not-!” She denied your claim, stuttering and stumbling.

“Has every brain cell been fucked out of your mind? Or was it the coke that did it?”

“You little bitch-“ The chance to retire ended when Curtis had pulled you behind him, steeling himself in front of you, standing off against his ex wife.

“You can’t be within 100 feet of this place. I’m giving you once chance to leave before I call the cops.” One hand was held behind him, the gentle touch calming him and easing you.

“Curtis I swear-“

“Talk through my lawyer. I have nothing else to say to you.” He turned and led you back into the house, still keeping close to you until the vehicle had pulled away, and then he relaxed.

“I’m sending cow shit to her in the mail. A whole fucking box.”

[scarlett-x-rose]

You know what hunni? I fucking hate your wife. You have to fake being “normal” to her, pretend you love her instead of me, spend money on her instead of on me. Seriously, I fucking hate her. Be a sweetie and tell me how much you hate your wifey too while you edge towards a hotter girl - meee 💕 Be honest, since you married her, she’s aged, she nags, she doesn’t want you gooning to the fucked up shit you edge too. All the opposite to me huh? 😇💖 Like, for real, why are you even with her still? It makes me so sad knowing she’s messing up your life with me. 😢😔

You don’t want me to be unhappy do you? Why do you want me to be sad???? Oh, you don’t want me sad? You wanna make me happy??? Good wittle loser!! So why don’t you help me corrupt your relationship? And with Valentine’s Day coming, it’s literally the perfect time to do so!

This Valentine’s Day, why don’t you make sure wifey is served with divorce papers 😈 It’s like, the perfect present for her and you know she always deserves something perfect right? Let’s get you home wrecked by me, fucktard ��� Ruin the one real person who’s stuck with you. Don’t worry baby, we’re not ruining your happiness because you know you’re gonna be so much happier simping for a 2D girl than you been with an aging piece of shit hag. And the best bit is this is even more brutal than you realise. Yes, you’re gonna break her heart just to be able to make me smile, and you’re sacrificing to make me laugh. But also, this will affect her forever. Even when she moves on with another man, every Valentine’s Day from now on will be a constant reminder of how her life was torn apart because of a hot anime waifu. She was beaten by a fictional girl and her ex-husband has no regrets. To me, that mental anguish is even hotter than you being upset at how fucking stupid you are 😹

So go ahead, make make me smile this Valentine’s Day. Oh, and send me something too lmao xoxo 💋

[rosydreamiing]

Happy Holidays, everyone ♥ or if it’s just another wintry week for you, I hope it’s a good one.

Many of you have been asking how I’m doing, which I am incredibly grateful for. Thank you for caring, it really means worlds to me. Apart from some common PTSD symptoms I’m doing much better than a couple weeks ago. Making art is a great form of therapy for me - if there’s anything positive about a heartbreak, it’s the inspiration. So, wherever my fucktard of an ex may be, I’d like to thank him for that. He may be gone but I’m still going to be an artist, no matter what.

Spending Christmas with my family has been most wonderful. I visited my sister and her husband and we had such a good time playing games, sledding and and eating tons of cheese. Times like these I feel so lucky to have a loving family and friends who have my back no matter what. This year has certainly shown me which people are the ones that are worth holding on to.

To those who have reached out to me during these few weeks; I love you forever. Whenever I may return to writing, I hope to see you all here again soon.

[heartthesouth]

Serious...

I started to reply to @just-a-wretched-wumman's post: http://just-a-wretched-wumman.tumblr.com/post/157713162036/friends-enemies-fucktards-lend-me-your-ears (sorry-on phone and can't do the cute link) but my reply was too long so I thought it best to do my own post. Here goes. I have NO problem with never posting about Sam/Cait's personal life in the future (unless they share their status openly) because they have pretty much made me not care. I was very disappointed at the deception but I guess I'm over that too. I love the books and show. That won't change. I hope they're both happy personally and successful professionally; I owe them that for the pleasure they've given me in their portrayals of Jamie and Claire. That's it. In fact, I'm sitting here watching 48 Hours and this episode is "Stalker". In Hollywood. It's very real. "The current access to celebrities via social media breeds erotomania, a condition wherein you fantasize you are in a romantic relationship with someone you don't know." LA was the first city, nationally, to have an anti-stalking law that eventually became a felony. It was due to the Rebecca Schaefer case for those who remember 1989. Their PD now has a whole unit (Threat Management Unit) that just deals with stalking and threats. They talked about Christina Grimmie, shot and killed by a fan as she was signing autographs after a concert. She'd never met him. Many people were interviewed. It's horrifying. "Many celebrities find themselves plagued by stalker." (Pauley Perrette, Gwyneth Paltrow, Sandra Bullock...) Then there's the regular stalker who is upset over a breakup. I have had several friends go through this and can't count the times my ex-husband police officer took calls from friends (his and mine) asking advice on what to do about this problem. Truth is, not much can be done except a restraining order, which is pretty useless. I worked with a nurse who was stalked after she broke up with a guy. He beat her to death. She left behind a small child. It's very possible to me that with so many women obsessed with Sam, there could've been a threat. Remember the odd rambling Twitter person? That wasn't funny to me. It's a scary thought. How many more of those are out there about which we have no idea? Maybe that explains why they (who some refer to as C Listers but I have no idea about the Lists) are going to such lengths for privacy. So I think I can just leave it and enjoy what they give me. I know it might not make a huge difference, but it's what I can do. And as my dad used to say, all we can do is what we can do.

[ncartistry1]

Oh, Pandemic, You Little Rascal...

Always pay attention to what is going on around you and keep your eyes up because the moment you become wrapped up in your own mess... POW, Global fucking pandemic motherfuckers!!!!! Yea.

I really thought this year would be going quite a bit differently right about now. I did get a new apartment of my own. I am still getting divorced. But now because Earth decided to remind us who's boss, my stupid ass allowed my soon-to-be ex-husband to move in as well so he is still living with me. By the way, moving during this time was in no way an easy task. And if that isn't bad enough, it gets even better! My teenage stepson's mom had him removed from her home to a shelter because she couldn't handle him, then lied about her custody of him, had him removed again within hours of him returning, and was possibly going to be placed in foster care. So in rides Nichole with her stupid giant heart and says he needs to come back and live with us too!

I have always felt the need to help people, no matter how they have treated me in the past I feel like I am meant to help as much as I can. Now I am helping the man I am divorcing get full custody of his son. I feel like such a fool and this situation is all sorts of messed up, but I can't shake the feeling that I need to so this. Luckily the crazyass, whorebag, fucktard of a mother is making this easy.

Divorces and child custody don't have to be this hard all the time. The whole child support system is a fucking joke as well. It is possible to not hate each other after a break up or divorce. It is possible to coparent, be civil with each other, come up with a support system that benefits the child rather than the parents, and even remain friends afterwards! Move on, people. Focus on the present and the future.

I'm really not sure where I was going with this. I'm tired. I'm frustrated. But I'm still moving forward. Wear a mask in public. Wash your damn hands. Stay safe. And though I've probably not said it to any of the people I should have, just know that I care about you and I love you.

[magnificentvoidhumanshoe]

Venting Post

It's been months and it still hurts, bad. Not only was I hurt by the one I said vows too, but also by a person I thought was my friend. She manipulated him. No excuses for him though either. She also ruined my life. I now have personal thoughts that I am scared of...why? Because of her. She ruined me. She ruined my life. She thought she knew me. Nope. It actually had nothing to do with me, nor him. It was for her. Her pleasure. Her enjoyment. Not her pain and suffering. I fucking hate her slutty, bulldog ugly looking ass. Funny, everytime I show as picture of her to someone, their reaction is priceless. I'm definitely not the one to make fun of someone's appearance and that's a promise, but it's a little different when it's a homewrecking whore that ended up in the mental institution (true story). Not to mention, my grandpa's jaw dropped when he seen a picture of her...let's just say my grandma yelled at him for his negative comments about her 😂 before I get judged for being too harsh, please note that I sent her a 2-3 page letter of expressing how I felt and how she hurt me... not one part of that letter was mean or degrading. Why did I write that letter? Because I am trying so hard to find closure in all of this shit she put me through and is still putting me through. I wanted her to admit her wrongs and apologize, that is all. Not to become buddy buddy with her. I don't understand how a human being and go destroy someone's life (not to mention her 'friend' and her boss's daughter) and then continue to live happy like nothing happened. Fuck. I hope she is miserable. She got herself a boyfriend literally 2 months after breaking up my marriage... you seriously couldn't of waited those 2 months for a guy to notice you, instead of ruining my relationship? Guarantee she goes on day after day being happy with this fucktard while I'm trying to cling onto my life. Let me add that she manipulated my husband by saying she is going to kill herself if he doesn't leave me. She had this plan.... to steal him away so she can feel like she is worth something. Yes, I had deep concerns for her safety and wellbeing. I truly did. That's what a friend is for, but at this point she should've just killed herself. I am so glad her killing herself bullshit in exchange for my misery. Fun fact slut bag, people with REAL suicidal thoughts don't manipulate people to get what they want, post about it on social media, joke around about it, etc.. people with actual real pain and thoughts, just do it unfortunately. It's always the people you least expect too. Not attention whores. Kinda funny how he bashed you with comments about how nasty you felt and gross you were... reason why he couldn't continue (yes, he is at fault too and he got what he deserved). He didn't run away from his guilt, he had the balls to say something and admit his wrongs, but you on the other hand ran away like a little guilty ugly ass bitch. I tried to reach a common ground with you, but you went to the cops TWICE! I get it if I was threatening you or something, but it was the complete opposite. You selfish shit. I think a huge part of my pain is the fact that I know you're a better person than that. Ironic.

Side note: After all this ranting and shit, I do hope she gets help and doesn't hurt herself. At one point, she was my friend, I cared for her. But now I just hate her. Hate. Hate. Hate. Hate. I also hope she never finds true love because I don't want her to feel the pain I felt with what she did... lord I cannot WAIT to hear the news that she got married (if it even happens).

*karma is a bitch. what goes around, comes around*

^^^^^^

With that being said..when karma strikes, you have one less person to have by your side. Watcha going to do? You seriously cannot fix stupid 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Side note #2: lots of background and history that tied into everything that happened that lead me into this rant.

Just to be clear. No one should be concerned over my wellbeing or anyone else's! I'm not a bitch, I'm just a hurting ex-wife who doesn't have closure.

AND

Even though she ruined my life and I have bad thoughts (common thoughts spouses have that are going through this), if it all comes down to it and she is actually struggling to hold on and she for some odd ass reason came to me (like I said, friends before), I would help her through everything despite everything that was done and said because I'm a human being and I don't want anyone to feel like their life isn't worth living. Not even on my homewrecking enemy.

Rant over. For real this time.

[princessdevy03]

Aloe Vera Smooth....

So after I burned another troll bridge to the ground (got a fucktard review from a self proclaimed fucktard who I trolled back and promptly blocked), I got a new "author follower." I guess my writing isn't so horrible after all. Now, I know we don't have too many guys writing in KevEdd. And after I saw a "stop fetisizing us" post on Tumblr from a guy who writes slash to women who write slash, I got to thinking. Bad idea, I know! But please bear w me! Most of what I've seen from KevEdd is good stuff. Outside of some AUs, the plots are realistic. Sometimes TOO realistic, but that's life, eh? So while I wonder if I'm fetishizing, most of my complaints come from ppl who are a "certain type" of MALE. If you read their profiles and stories, or check their faves, Kevin is still a bully or The Eds in general become top dogs and their neighbors are their pets now. That shit bugs the fuck out of me bc it's OBVIOUS they've become the epitome of what they hate, but they can't see it and you bet not dare call them out on it. And as a woman, all I see is another man trying to bully me into silence bc I don't fit his paradigm. And you KNOW I can give fuck all abt that. Doesn't mean that shit don't burn, tho. I'm always one to give ppl second chances bc that's what I want for myself. It can drive ppl nuts, but it's who I am. It's why I tolerate my ex husband. It's why even through heartbreak, I still believe in love. And I still love someone even when I prolly shouldn't. So when I write abt the possibility of Edd and Marie ever being even FRIENDS, let alone Kevin and Edd getting together, I really wonder what sad existence ppl have to be living to even think that the cul-de-sac as a whole or the Kankers don't deserve redemption. Like, WHO HURT YOU?! And when are you gonna let it go?! Maybe I'm spoiled bc I came of age before access to the internet was so easy and cheap. I don't bother w ppl who don't bother w me, but I'm not gonna be a dick abt it all, either.