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blujayonthewing · 2 years

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once again thinking about how never leaving the house or being around other human beings makes you actually insane but also I am living in an era of both widespread disabling plague and near universal disinterest in avoiding plague at the same time

#and even the people who still give even paltry lipservice to covid #friend a month ago: do you want to come over? everyone in the house is sick but it's rsv not covid :)#friend now: I have not stopped coughing for an entire month #not that the lipservice to covid helps either she's been doing karaoke at a local bar every week all year #and anyway it just... feels kinda hopeless regardless... almost all my friends have preschool/ daycare age kids #or rightwing families #or work in schools or hospitals #this has all been true the entire time but now it's also like 'aw is everything okay?' if I wear a mask around them indoors #2021 when 'everyone present is vaccinated' felt like it actually mattered sure was nice #I don't want covid and I very do not want long covid and I STILL do not think that is weird or irrational of me but!! fuck me I guess!!#anyway I'm married and have the internet so I'm not COMPLETELY isolated but I am still... mostly...... you know #and like! okay what is the alternative!! I wanna go to my friends' house and lay on their floor and get jumped on by toddlers #I wanna invite people over for dinner! I wanna have movie nights!! I wanna see and talk to and touch other people sometimes!!#and like... you Need to as a human being. you need those things #I feel like I'm withering away #haha his sucks dot jpeg #about me

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