#he became a dad and immediately started wearing socks with sandals

[wheredidalltheusersgo]

Total Drama Future AU design number 5!

He is 38 in this AU

After Ridonculous Race, he settled down with Bridgette and married her, but they kept their marriage open. They had a nice beach wedding in 2012.

On January 5th, 2013, during a blizzard, they had Emma.

On June 12th, 2013, during a heatwave, Geoff had Wayne for Lindsay and Tyler.

Geoff kept up his job of being a talk show host (WITHOUT Blaineley) while Bridgette pursued a career in marine biology.

They have a pretty normal life, and Geoff manages to keep the fame of his job from going to his head.

While Geoff is still close with many members of the Total Drama cast, he is especially close with Tyler, Lindsay, DJ, Duncan, Scott, Gwen, Izzy, Owen, and Justin.

[shurisneakers]

harmless (ii)

Summary: Bucky volunteers to go stop a small time villain, but nothing can prepare him for what exactly he has to deal with. (Bucky x villain!reader, drabble series)

Warnings: cursing, stealing cultural landmarks, frustrated bucky

Word count: 1.6k

A/N: made a header 4 this fic but i couldn’t take it seriously enough <3 

if you have any ideas for future inventions/evil plans, lemme know! it’s always fun to hear from y’all. 

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333

Previous Part || Series Masterlist

It’s roughly a week before he sees you next.

Right on time too, according to the briefings he had received. Once a week you’d come up with your next batshit crazy idea and someone would be sent to make sure you didn’t execute it.

It was more of a babysitting gig than anything. Most people would do one, maybe two assignments before asking to not be sent again. 

He was not most people. He volunteers to go again. His afternoon is relatively free and he’s bored. 

Also, and more importantly, he needs to get out of the house before Sam finds out what he did.

“You’ll find her near the Statue of Liberty.”

“How do we know?”

“Oh, she tells us.”

“...she tells us where to find her?”

“Most times, yes. She says it’s time efficient.”

Absurd. He thinks you’re absurd.

Bucky finds you in line to board the ferry. You’re dressed to the nines like an obnoxious tourist, even though you were a local, topped with binoculars and a bucket hat. 

On an unrelated note, he thinks that maybe the mission today is to kill you for daring to wear sandals with socks like a suburban dad. A shudder runs through his body when he sees it.  

He’s wearing all black and a baseball cap. Somehow he’s standing out more than you are.

He boards the ferry behind you, keeping a close eye on all your movements. You take your place near the railing, a seat near the front of the boat. 

His phone rings. He answers it, expecting Sam to screech at him for painting Redwing neon pink again. He should have known it was coming after he shoved Bucky off the quinjet before he had time to strap his parachute on properly. 

“I thought I told you to bring a cape.” 

He quickly looks up at you but you’re not facing him. You have your phone held up to your ear, however.

“How did you get this number?” he asks icily.

“I knew you’d show up again.” Your head tilts to look at the statue in the distance. “Also, thanks for the door money, but I’m not sure I appreciate how you think the least creepy way to give someone money is to drop it off anonymously at their doorstep.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.” He swiftly gets up, stalking over to where you’re sitting. He was advised not to do anything aggressive. Advised was a flexible word. 

“Because I wasn’t going to answer it.” You look up at his figure looming over you. “Oh, hey.”

The phone is still pressed to the side of your face even though he’s right beside you. He cuts the call, shoving it back into his pocket.

“Allow me to introduce my pl-”

“What are you doing here?” He cuts to the chase. 

You send him a glare. “I was going to say it before you told me to. And sit down before everyone thinks you’re going to kill me.”

“Why are you going there?” He doesn’t have time for this, he thinks. He has important things to do. Like watching the reruns of Masterchef Junior. 

He sits in the seat beside you.

“Look at us.” You grin at him. “Me with the evilest outfit I could think of, you with your... Addams Family cosplay. We’re like, two peas in a po-”

“Start explaining,” he interjects. 

You roll your eyes. “I’m going to shrink the Statue of Liberty and use it as a keychain.”

“What?” It’s probably the most benign plan he’s ever heard in his life.

“I’m kidding.” Oh, good. “I’m not using it as a keychain, I’m taking it to class.” Nevermind. 

“What?” He finds himself repeating his previous question.

“I’m shrinking all the statues I can find. I want to use it in my classroom to teach the kids.”

“You’re... a teacher?” He blinks.

“You got a problem with that?” You look offended, to say the least. 

“No.” It’s not what he would peg your occupation as. He didn’t think you had one at all. “How are you planning on shrinking it?”

You rummage through the ugliest fanny pack he has ever had the misfortune of seeing. You pull out a small ring box, complete with a bow tied neatly on top. 

“I was saving this for our third anniversary, but-” you offer him a nervous laugh.

His stony expression doesn’t change, not even a blink. 

“Fine, Jesus, you’re no fun,” you huff, dropping the emotional act when he doesn’t look amused. 

You flip open the lid. Inside there are a few small disks. It looks familiar, he realises.

“Your friend Ant-Boy didn’t file a patent, so I just took his whole shtick.” He wants to defend Scott’s honour; it’s Ant-Man not boy. He doesn’t. He’s too transfixed on what you have in your hand.

“Pym particles.”

“The diet version.” You pick up one of them carefully. “A ripoff, but effective. Just gotta attach it to the thing I want to shrink and give it a few minutes.”

“You’re going to steal the Statue of Liberty,” he says, frankly a little taken aback that you were serious.

“Would you relax? I’ll put it back.”

“That’s not the point,” he damn near exclaims. “You can’t take away the Statue of Liberty just because you feel like it.”

“I literally can.” You point to the chips in your hand. “That’s the point of this, keep up.”

He feels exasperated. He didn’t sign up for this when he became an Avenger.

“Give me the box.” He makes a grab for it but you yank it away from his reach.

“What do you think you’re doing?” 

“I don’t have time for this.” His reruns would begin in an hour.

“That’s my problem, because...” you trail off. 

He rolls his eyes, makes a grab at the box again. His tactic is different this time. He stealthily pins one of your arms down so that you’re basically incapacitated.

“Hey! Stop that.” You fumble against his reach, shoving him with your elbow.

“Just give me the thing and we can all go home for the day,” he huffs, unfazed by your squirming.

“No! Over my dead bod-” 

He doesn’t immediately notice what goes wrong in the scuffle. 

Until you look at the ground near your feet. A disk lay there, undisturbed.

“Is that-” All of a sudden, either he’s getting taller or the ceiling of the boat is getting lower.

“Oops,” you say, not remorseful in the slightest. 

“Are we going to-”

“I’d give it five minutes max.” 

Great. He was stuck on a boat that was beginning to shrink. The other passengers were either oblivious or ignorant to seats that were starting to become too small for them, but Bucky’s heightened senses and extreme reflexes made it hard to skip.

He nudges the piece of tech with his foot. Maybe he can kick it off the boat.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” you warn solemnly. He wants to disagree but doesn’t know enough about the device to dispute you. 

“Fix this,” he hisses, panic slightly rising. His fingers find their way to his phone to send out an emergency text requesting backup and mass evacuation. 

“I think it’s a rather lovely day for a swim, don’t you?” You stare dreamily at the waves that were inching closer up the boat. 

Or you were inching closer to the water. Technicalities were frivolous. 

“There are other people on this boat.”

“River’s big enough for all of us, I reckon.”

“Fix it.” 

“Or what?” There’s a wicked gleam in your eye. “We both know I have the upper hand here.”

“Or I call the entirety of the Avengers here and haul your ass to prison.”

“Will they bring snacks?”

You’re insufferable. You know it. But you also are the fastest way to get out of this situation and right now, he didn’t want to be responsible for a shipwreck simulation. 

“Fine. Tell me what you want.”

“I like soy chips.”

“Soy chi-” He nearly throws his hands up in frustration. “You know what I’m talking about.” 

“I want one historical artifact so I can impress the kids. They think I’m the cool teacher and I want to keep that reputation alive.”

“What makes you think I can arrange for that?”

“You’ve been alive since goddamn dinosaurs roamed this earth, I’m sure you have some connections.” You pause to assess his face. “You know, you don’t look a day over 29. Dermatologists must hate yo-”

“I’ll get you an artifact, now fix the fuckin’ boat.”

“You promise?” You grin brightly. 

He stares at you. You are unyielding. 

The boat’s uncomfortably small and people are beginning to take notice. Worried murmurs fill the air behind him.

“Yes.”

“Okay.” You shrug simply.

You kneel over, picking up the chip from the ground. You do nothing else for two minutes, instead turning away from him to look at the Statue of Liberty that was coming closer.

It takes him a while to realise that half his body isn’t hanging off his chair anymore. The ceiling is moving further and further away from the top of his head. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” He wants to strangle you. 

Why did he listen to you when all of this would have been over the minute he kicked it off the ship. 

“You can drop it off at my lair on Monday and pick it up on Friday.” You gather your belongings, leaving him steaming behind you. “Nice talkin’ to ya, Sergeant.” 

You step over him, flashing him a quick smile before walking off the boat with the rest of the tourists as if nothing had just taken place. When he looks down, the stupid ring box is on his lap.

He sits there, unmoving, eyes fixed on the container.

The ferry conductor asks if he’s going to get off the boat. 

He simply shakes his head.

Next part

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

ice lolly, m | ksj

pairing(s): seokjin x reader

summary: You (accidentally?) deep throat a popsicle in front of Min Yoongi. It's not what it looks like! Well, it kinda is, but you have a good reason! You just want to give your boyfriend, Kim Seokjin, a mind-blowing blowjob and you read some stuff online and, uh... okay, that still doesn't sound like a good reason, but I swear it is.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; established relationship; featuring seagull-BTS LOL; crack and fluff; smut (fem reader, m-receiving oral); ft Min Yoongi witnessing your, um, attempt XD; my tongue technology strikes again, maybe you'll learn something?

this is inspired by your hapless adventures, cat whiskers. you told me not to do it, but I'm a brat and I did it anyway LMAO get rekt

--

So.

You read this thing online.

What if you just...

"What are you doing?"

You started with a shriek, jamming the entire ice lolly right into the back of your throat, instantly choking and yanking it out of your mouth, only for it to be flung off the wooden stick and fly across the sidewalk, leaving a long, ice-blue streak of melting sugar syrup ending with a demolished hunk of discarded popsicle.

A seagull immediately appeared to peck at it.

You gawked, still clutching the wooden stick, Min Yoongi standing beside the bench you were sitting on.

"Why did you try to deep throat your popsicle?"

A second seagull arrived to peck at the icy hunk of sugar water.

Your mouth was still open, mechanically jerking to face him with fire-red cheeks, and it wasn’t because of the bright sunny weather. He looked very much like a disgruntled cat with his expression, black eyebrow raised, dark brown eyes narrowed, pink lips slightly pursed. Yoongi squinted disapprovingly from under his wide-brimmed straw hat. He wore a long-sleeved black shirt under a white t-shirt, breezy black trousers, and sandals.

Yoongi hated the sun.

A third seagull flapped down onto the boardwalk and joined the other two to poke at the rapidly melting mess on the ground.

"Um..."

He raised a hand dismissively, eyes flicking away from you. "On second thought, don't tell me. I don't want to know." Yoongi jammed his black clutch under his armpit and ripped open his own cold sweet treat, turning away from you to face the ocean.

A fourth seagull flocked over to peck one of them in the head and assist in devouring the ice pop.

"Hey, hyung, what flavor did you get?" a smooth baritone voice piped, appearing in an aqua-and-pink colorful shirt and brown shorts with snazzy sunglasses and tan skin.

You were staring at the four seagulls eating your ice lolly with glee, somewhat frozen yourself, feeling a mixture of jealous, mortified, and absolutely ready to chuck yourself into the ocean if Yoongi said anything to out you to Kim Taehyung right now.

"I don't know. I told them to pick one at random," the straw hat replied.

A fifth seagull appeared, slightly smaller than the rest, poking one in the neck and squawking before trying to prod at the puddle of blue syrup with a small chunk of ice in it.

"I got strawberry," Taehyung replied.

Two more seagulls swooped down, pushing the other five all around. All of them were now pecking at the ice-blue sugar syrup, honking and squawking. Like laughter. One of the seagulls had a weird cry, like a cloth rubbed onto wet glass.

Or a windshield wiper on a car window.

"Disgusting."

You narrowed your eyes at the seven seagulls.

We they... laughing at you?

"Strawberry-flavored things are the worst."

You jumped as someone sat down next to you, ripping open a paper package. He was wearing a short-sleeved pale pink dress shirt with a flashy tie and long blue shorts. A familiar someone dressed like this. He placed his backpack down next to you, smiling brilliantly. Full lips, sparkling brown eyes, milk chocolate-colored locks framing his handsome face.

Your boyfriend, Kim Seokjin.

"S-Seokjin!"

He grinned and leaned in, kissing you lightly. Then he became flustered and laughed awkwardly, a little squeaky, almost like a windshield wiper on a car window.

"Hah, sorry, you looked really cute just now."

You blinked rapidly.

Do you tell your boyfriend that you tried to deep throat your ice lolly in attempt to see if you could extend your tongue around the bottom because you read on a certain-website-not-to-be-named that it might be possible to suck dick and lick balls at the same time and you were determined to learn so you could perform said act?

And do you tell Seokjin that Min Yoongi caught you in the middle of it?

Er…

Seokjin cheerfully licked at his lemon ice pop, oblivious to your inner struggle.

"Where's yours? I thought you got one too?"

The seven seagulls cackled. You glared at them, ready to fight.

"Hyung."

Never mind, you paled to the color of rice paper as the deep voice with a little rasp to it appeared beside Seokjin, straw hat and all. You wished you could merge with your pastel floral summer dress and float off with the sea breeze, straight into the ocean after seeing the deadpan expression of Min Yoongi holding a mint green popsicle.

He looked bored, but his eyes were mocking you.

Asshole.

"She dropped it by accident."

"Ah, really?" Seokjin frowned, nudging you with his hand. "Here, have some of mine. I'll share with you." He wrapped his arm around you and patted your shoulder fondly, holding his ice lolly out to you. You felt your heart skip a little at his kindness and closeness.

Yoongi smirked behind Seokjin's head.

You narrowed your eyes at him.

The seven seagulls flapped off, flying above five guys standing near you three, eating icy sweet treats together on the boardwalk this sunny day, enjoying this nice retreat to the sea. A lone seagull popped out from behind a trashcan, trotting over, eyeing the wet spot of sugar syrup soaked into asphalt.

It slunk away in a back corner, dejected that there was nothing left.

"Come on, hurry before it melts."

You nibbled off a chunk. Mmm. Cold, lemony, and delicious. You smiled at Seokjin gratefully and he smiled back, warm and inviting, his cheeks puffing a little like the edges of raised bread. A little sheepish at the public display of affection, but unable to help it when he was with you.

"You might as well stick the whole thing in your mouth," Yoongi said off-handedly, walking away to the group of five guys, leaving you choking on the bench again as Seokjin rubbed your back soothingly, worriedly asking you what was wrong.

-

"YOU TRIED TO DEEP THROAT A POPSICLE?"

"Seokjinnie–"

"IN FRONT OF YOONGI?"

"Erm, it's not what it sounds like–"

"YOONGI???????"

“I swear it’s not what It sounds like!”

Seokjin yanked the towel off his head, half-dried brown hair sticking up every which way, gawping at you with a slack jaw and shocked brown eyes. He was wearing his emerald green silk pajamas, fresh after a nice shower from the hot day. You too, wore a set of pajamas, a matching outfit with Seokjin.

“It’s not what it sounds like?” he sputtered, flabbergasted, partly flabbered but mostly aghast.

You opened your mouth and closed it. Then you opened it again.

“Okay, it is what it sounds like, but–!”

Why did you bring this up now? Well, your boyfriend was asking you if you wanted to take some medicine and sleep early because you said you weren’t feeling well at dinner. He was a sweet bean and wanted the best for you, and the truth came out in mid-discussion. Seokjin and you had left earlier than everyone else, declining the scenic walk home, mostly because you could no longer stand Yoongi making snide remarks that meant nothing to anyone else except you.

“You might need a bit more force to suck up that thick milkshake. Or wait for it to melt.”

“That’s a pretty big piece of steak. Maybe you should cut it a bit smaller, so you don’t choke.”

“You sure you don’t want to stay for dessert? We could stop by the store and get you an ice lolly on our way home.”

You glared at him all evening.

Yoongi just smirked when Seokjin wasn’t looking.

Asshole.

“Why would you do that in public?” Seokjin was saying, yanking you back to reality and out of your daydreams of socking that smug little shit in the face. “Why would you do that at all?”

“G-Gah, it… it just… just occurred to me…”

“It occurred to you to suck an ice lolly like a dick?”

Seokjin looked as if he was going to pass out and divorce you at the same time and you weren’t even married yet.

“Why, because you’re going to suck frozen dick at some point in your life? Because my dick isn’t ever at subzero temperatures, so unless you’re sucking Mr. Freeze or Subzero’s dick–”

You waved your arms in a panicky manner, flapping your sleeves like a fucking seagull. “No, no, no, I read something online–”

“Oh, you read something online!” he exclaimed, wiggling in place, and now it sure as hell sounded like Kim Seokjin was mocking you while also being disappointed in you and if that wasn’t the most big dad energy you weren’t sure what was. “Yes, because that totally means you should perform fellatio on an ice pop in front of Yoongi of all fucking people! Are you trying to get bronchitis or something–”

“I admit it was a mistake!”

“A miss-take! It was a terrible take! Cut! Refilm! Actually, no, because maybe don’t try to give a blowjob to a fucking popsicle at the boardwalk in broad daylight!”

You smacked Seokjin in the chest and he looked highly offended, finally shutting up for one goddamn second so you could (poorly) explain your logic behind the incident.

“Look, Yoongi was not supposed to be there. At all. I got mine first and you all were deciding and arguing, so I decided to sit down and eat it, but then I noticed it was a specific length–”

Seokjin’s eyebrows rose so high they nearly left his face.

You prodded him in the pecs and he winced, pouting at you.

“So, I tried to put it in my mouth, but then Yoongi showed up and fucking spooked me and I jabbed myself in the throat because I was surprised and ended up rocket-launching my ice lolly across the sidewalk and then these fucking seagulls showed up, those bastards–”

“None of this explains why you tried to do it in the first place.”

“Uh…”

Your eyes shifted awkwardly.

Seokjin impatiently tapped his naked wrist that had no watch on it.

“I read it… in an online smut story I was reading…”

You perfectly handsome boyfriend might actually get a wrinkle if he continued to raise his eyebrows to the fucking moon. “You do what?”

You poked your index fingers together, biting your lip. “Because… I’m not very good at it… so I was thinking maybe I could learn some tips or something…”

“What?”

Now his voice was soft, immediately dropping the act and his anger. You saw him reach out and place his hand over yours, wrapping his fingers around tightly, tugging. You looked up and he tilted his head, brow knitted in worry.

“Hey,” Seokjin frowned, full lower lip sticking out. “What do you mean, you’re not good at it? You are. I like everything you do.”

You chewed on your lip anxiously. “But… but…” It was a stupid thought and, honestly, not that big of a deal, but it had been eating away at you for a while, so you just winced and let it out.

“You never finish with my mouth.”

Rapid blinking was his response. His eyebrows disappeared under his brown hair again.

“And it bothers me. You always finish with your hand into my mouth, but I can’t seem to do it by myself.”

Seokjin’s lips parted, looking apologetic. “Why didn’t you say anything sooner?”

You wrung your hands, loosening his grip on you. “I don’t know, it seems weird to say in the moment and it’s embarrassing… I thought maybe I wasn’t good enough…”

“No, no,” he said gently, holding your shoulders and shaking his head. “I...” His ears turned bright red and he swallowed. “I just like… seeing it shoot out into your mouth.” He coughed awkwardly, squeezing your shoulders. “It’s, er, nice, watching my cum drip onto your tongue and lips…” Seokjin cleared his throat and smiled, cheeks puffing out, looking a bit like the sides of freshly baked bread. “I didn’t realize my selfishness was making you feel inadequate. That’s not it at all. I only wanted to make it easier on you, and, cough, it’s kind of hot…”

“O… oh.”

He patted your shoulder fondly. “It’s only a misunderstanding. We can do whatever you want next time, okay? I’m sorry I made you feel that way. I will do better.”

You nodded and smiled, feeling much more relieved about the whole thing. Seokjin always had the ability to help you let things go, and it always made you feel a little lighter. It was part of the past now and you wouldn’t be bothered if Yoongi teased you any longer, because you had the best boyfriend in the whole world. There was no need to feel embarrassed.

You wrapped your arms around Seokjin and gave him a big, fierce hug.

Only to be impaled in the lower stomach.

“Ow!”

“Ack!”

You jerked back, whipping your head down.

“No, no, no, stop! Stop looking!”

“Why are you hard?!”

Seokjin waved his arms and abruptly flapped his hands down on his massive tent. “We were talking about blowjobs! And you! What do you think is going to happen?” he spluttered, the red creeping from his ears to his cheeks now, matching the exact shades used on merchandise during Christmas time with emerald green pajamas and a red face.

You gawked at him and he gawked back.

Wait.

“This is a perfect chance!”

“No, no, no, it is not, cease and desist, woman! Everyone is coming back soo–Gah!”

There was flurry of movement and Seokjin’s pajama pants were flung off, along with his shirt, and you were pushing him down onto the bed, him panicking the entire time, but he couldn’t have been that mad about it, because he was helping you by backing up, yelping as you hooked your fingers over the waistband of his underwear and yanked down, freeing his erection that nearly slapped you in the face.

“You trying to take out my eyeball?” you teased, grinning.

“You assaulting me and you’re upset that I’m fighting back?” Seokjin retorted, trying to hide his smile and be serious, but he was terrible at that and so were you, both of you grinning like a pair of idiots.

Well, you were certainly a little bit of an idiot for trying to deep throat a – you’re right, we’ll let it go (for now).

“I learned some things,” you said excitedly, forcing his legs open abruptly and making him squeak.

“Things? Ack!”

You leaned down and lifted his hard length up delicately, licking a fat stripe from base to tip, sighing softly as you came into contact with the velvety skin and his clean scent, Seokjin gasping above you, but suddenly this was not about him, this was about the cock in front of you and all the information you had complied to this point, ready to apply your learning. You wrapped your lips around the head, swiping your tongue on the underside, and Seokjin groaned, hips twitching but you grabbed them and pressed them firmly to the bed, shooting him a glare.

“Don’t interrupt me,” you growled around his dick.

He gave you a helpless frown. “Hello, I’m still attached to this di–”

You stared at him and slid your tongue out from your lips, swirling it around his girth, pressing the sensitive tip around the contours of your mouth, his eyes widening as he witnessed spit dripping from the wet muscle.

“O… oh…”

You let your eyes drift over his form, slowly, slowly, savoring the lines of his body, broad shoulders, shapely collarbones, the curve downwards to his trim waist, all the while taking him your mouth, tongue and lips soft and mouth tight, breathing deeply, eyes flickering up to his face and his expanding pupils, watching you with awe.

“Holy shit… and you’re not even naked… o-oh, fuck…”

You cocked an eyebrow, probably looking much more confident than you actually felt, but that didn’t matter. Fake it till you make it, right? And besides, every protagonist in every story has a moment of letting go and having courage and this was your moment, inorganic or not, flexing your tongue against Seokjin’s ever stiffening length, his breathing turning into wispy moans, watching you poised over him with his dick in your mouth, still wearing the silk pajamas and yet.

He watched you with amazement, love and lust in his brown orbs.

“You’re the most beautiful woman in the world.”

Your ears burned hot and you tried not to choke on his dick in embarrassment.

Don’t ruin the moment!

Somehow you managed not to freak out and pressed your lips to the base of his cock, hitting his crotch, the uncomfortable feeling of too full expanding your throat, the head practically plugging your airway, but one glance at Seokjin and the suffocation was worth it, seeing him tip his head back, messy brown hair sliding past his forehead, groaning your name with his eyes closed.

You pulled back a little, took a breath, and went back down for the kill.

“What the fuck…?”

Lower lip opening, tongue stretching out, only able to move the tip a bit at the top of his balls. Hm. This wasn’t working. You adjusted and cupped a hand under them, lifting the two soft mounds and pressing them to your chin, your tongue swiping out over them, his dick bending a little in your mouth (more flexible and a lot warmer than an ice lolly, by the way), and Seokjin was losing it above you, shuddering and whining, a mix of curses and your name as you turned your head to get a different angle, the tip of his cock pushed to one side of your throat, determined to see what was most comfortable and got you the best reaction, saliva coating his balls and causing them to become more slippery. You furrowed your brows and gripped his balls tighter, smearing the slick liquid over the soft skin and Seokjin moaned obscenely loudly, falling onto the bed, back arching.

“Oooh, fuck, fuck, fuck…”

Abruptly, your throat spasmed, reminding you that needed to breathe, and you pulled back, coughing and panting slightly.

“Does that feel good?” you wheezed. Not the sexiest. You grimaced and cleared your throat, asking again. “Did that feel good for you?”

Seokjin tipped his head up, brown eyes glazed over, breathing hard. “Ah… It feels nice, but I don’t think I could finish with that…” Your frown deepened, but he shook his head, sending his brown hair floating everywhere. “It’s not tight enough. But it’s an insane turn on, so I think I could cum faster after…” He coughed, cheeks flushing. “After feeling and seeing it, you know?”

Your frown erased and you nodded, gently rubbing his soaked balls, seeing him shiver and his breathing shallow. “I think I understand, yeah.”

“Can… ah, can you finish me, p-please, ack, you k-keep – fuuuuuuuck…”

You went down again, but this time your focus was on the tightness of your mouth, tongue sliding from side to side, bobbing your head in a smooth, swift motion, keeping your lips soft, eyes closing as you felt his cock twitch inside your mouth, completely focused on the sensation of Seokjin in between your lips, breathing him in, the soft scent of fresh soap and his sweetness, trying to remember if there was anything you had forgotten.

Ah, yes!

You tipped your head back slightly and Seokjin cried out, heady and erotic, as the head of his cock dragged along the roof of your mouth before burying into your throat, over and over, hot saliva and a squirming tongue amplifying the sensation, realizing you needed to relax your throat but clench your mouth muscles while relaxing your lips and doing all this while keeping track of where his cock was going in your mouth so you didn’t accidentally choke on his dick.

A whole new level of multitasking.

Was the writer of that erotica you were reading some kind of sex god, because what the fuck–

But it didn’t matter, because even if it was sloppy and you couldn’t focus on all these things simultaneously, Seokjin was feeling only pleasure, fingers curling in the sheets, barely able to choke out his words through his moans.

“F-Faster, please…”

Faster? You could barely keep up as it was!

“Please…” he whined and you obeyed immediately, faster it was, because you were weak for him, weak for Kim Seokjin and his pleading face, pupils so blown out he seemed intoxicated, drunk on pleasure, and that made you aroused too, seeing your effect of him, tightening ever more and increasing the pace, the wet smacking sounds quickening, echoing in the bedroom with his lustful groans of your name, so sweet and loving that if you weren’t going to pass out from how fast you were going, you were surely going to pass out from the overwhelming adoration in his eyes. It made you push for a little bit more, push your limits a little harder, made you feel like you could do this.

For him.

“Oh, fuck, I’m gonna cum, fuck!”

Seokjin gripped the sheets tight and threw his head back, chest expanding with a low moan, thrusting his hips up and cock jolting, shooting thick streams into your throat, and your eyes widened, forced to stop, feeling his cum pool, creamy and viscous, tasting the delicious saltiness at the base of your tongue, your eyelids fluttering a little at the feeling of the tip rutting against the roof of your mouth and more dribbling out, coating the inside of your mouth.

Oh.

Oooh, fuck, it felt good.

You swallowed, feeling victorious and insanely horny, tongue circling round and round his flinching stiffness, able to sense the pulse and his shudders, descending again because you couldn’t get enough, so good, the feeling of him still in your mouth, him shivering at your persistent licks and light sucks, stroking his hips and moaning at the skin to skin.

The front door banged open downstairs and there was a lot of laughing and shouting.

Your eyes snapped open and Seokjin looked back at you in sheer panic.

The footsteps up the stairs proved they were being taken two at a time.

“Shit.”

Never had Seokjin yanked his cock so fast out of your lips (sad) and snatched his underwear and pajamas, bolting to the bathroom and throwing himself in there in record time the literal second the bedroom door was yanked open by rambunctious strength and a grin whose front teeth were ever-so-slightly too large for his face.

“Hyung, noona!”

You were laying with your head in your hand and your elbow on the bed, which was probably too sexual and weird for Jeon Jungkook, but that was all you got that this moment. He gave you a slightly disturbed and confused look under his big black bucket hat.

“Where’s hyung?”

You coughed and lowered your hand, trying to get in a less awkward position. “B-bathroom…” you rasped. Oh no. Did you go too hard? You sounded a bit like the crypt keeper. Fortunately, you didn’t look like one, so there was that. You rubbed your throat, wincing at the soreness. You definitely went a bit rough. You weren’t no young spring chicken anymore. You were going to feel that in the morning.

Sacrifices had to be made.

Jungkook pouted, bounding up to you and tilting his head. He was a moving black fabric mountain with his long-sleeved shirt and billowy shorts. “Are you really sick, noona? Do you want hot tea or some milk?”

Oh my God, Jungkook, I just sucked some dick and that’s why I sound dead.

Don’t say that.

“I… I’ll be fine, Jungkook. Did you have a nice walk?”

“Oh, yeah! There were fireworks! I think the city was celebrating something, and it was so colorful and pretty…”

You sat there and nodded, trying to listen intently while trying not to think about how Seokjin was in the bathroom rinsing off his saliva and cum-covered dick literal meters from you and oblivious Jungkook.

You saw movement behind Jungkook’s excitedly bouncing head. No straw hat, just black hair flattened against his forehead, covering his cat-like, dark brown eyes.

Yoongi.

He smirked, holding up a box.

Frozen ice lollys, the fizzy soda flavor that was light blue.

A muscle in your eye twitched.

Asshole.

--

masterpost

[queenofcats17]

Remember that HLVRAI Coraline AU? Here’s the thing I wrote for it.

Original idea came from me, @lady-lampblack, and @sbpstudios

This is also really old and I’m now finally finishing it. Some things have changed since the initial post because I had ideas.

-----------------------------------------------------

Joshua hadn’t wanted to move. 

He’d liked his house and his friends and his school and hadn’t wanted to leave. But his dad had calmly explained that while he didn’t want to leave either, his new job was in another state. And while his dad hadn’t said it outright, Joshua knew money was tight. He’d heard his dad talking about not having enough money to keep the house when Gordon had thought Joshua was asleep. 

Barney had offered to help, but Gordon had gently turned him down, pointing out that Barney had his own things to deal with. A security guard’s salary could only go so far and Gordon didn’t want Barney sacrificing his own health and safety just to help him.

So, they’d moved. 

Joshua, his dad, and his dad’s roommate. 

Joshua sat in the back of the moving truck, staring up at the ceiling while he listened to his dad and Benrey argue. 

“We’re seriously not gonna have wi-fi for the whole weekend? That’s lame, dude.”

“Look, I couldn’t get anyone to come out any sooner. And it’s only for one weekend.”

“Lame, bro.”

“Well, I don’t know what you want me to do. That’s just how it’s gonna be.”

“Are there gonna be other kids at our new house?” Joshua asked, getting up so that he could look at Benrey and Gordon. Benrey was playing on his PSP while Gordon drove the moving truck.

Even if he had to move halfway across the country, maybe he could still manage to make some cool new friends.

“I dunno, bud,” Gordon admitted. “The landlord mentioned that he doesn’t usually rent to families with kids, so...probably not.”

“Oh.” Joshua’s face fell and he allowed himself to slump back onto the floor of the truck.

“I’m sorry, Joshie,” Gordon said, glancing back at his son.

Joshua said nothing. It wasn’t fair. The last time they’d moved, it had only been to another city, but it had still been hard. He’d been yanked away from his friend and had to make new friends. And now he’d have to make new friends all over again. 

“You’ll still have us, little man,” Benrey said, looking over his shoulder at the little boy slumped on the floor. 

“It’s not the same,” Joshua mumbled. “I wanna have friends my own age.”

“I know. I’m sorry, Joshie.”

Joshua said nothing else for the rest of the drive, curled up in a little ball.

Benrey and Gordon continued to talk off and on. Although it sounded like arguing, Joshua knew that was just the way the two of them were. They’d been this way for as long as he could remember. He knew his dad and Benrey cared a lot about each other, they’d lived together Joshua’s whole life after all, but neither of them seemed willing to admit it. Which made no sense to Joshua. He didn’t get why they didn’t just admit they liked each other. But then again, Joshua didn’t get a lot of stuff about grown-ups. 

He ended up falling asleep, only being woken up by his father announcing that they were there. Yawning and rubbing his eyes, Joshua sat up and peered out the windshield. Immediately his eyes widened. 

The building before them looked like something out of a historical drama, aside from the fact that it was all painted bright pink. It was massive, with what Joshua saw as towers, tons of windows, and a huge porch. 

“That’s our house?” Joshua asked, his voice hushed in awe. 

“Well, kind of,” Gordon said. “The house got converted into apartments a while ago, so we’re going to be living in one of the apartments.”

Joshua was briefly disappointed, but it didn’t last long. Apartments meant there would be other people, so he wouldn’t be alone. Plus, the house was in a wide open area so he could run around all he wanted.

“Can I look around?” Joshua asked, bouncing up and down. “I wanna look around!”

“Sure, just give me a second to find the landlord-”

But Joshua wasn’t listening. He’d heard ‘sure’ and had run with it, scrambling over the seat and Benrey to get out the door and onto the lawn.

He took off across the grass, eager to explore everything about the apartment complex. He’d never lived in an apartment in a house before! However, in his excitement, he failed to notice the man emerging from basement apartment. Before either knew what was happening, Joshua had plowed right into the man, knocking them both to the ground. 

“Joshie!” Gordon yelled, running after him. “Don’t go running off like that!” He knelt down and helped the man up. “I’m so sorry.”

“It-It’s okay,” the man replied with a smile. “I wasn’t looking where I was go-going either.”

The man was tall, even to Gordon, which meant that he looked like a giant to Joshua. He was wearing what could only be called “dad clothes”, his attire consisting of a loud Hawaiian shirt, cargo shorts, and socks and sandals. 

“You’re really tall,” Joshua announced.

The man blinked, then laughed. “I get that a lot.”

“So...do you live here?” Benrey asked, peering past Gordon.

“Not...exactly?” The man laughed again. “I-I’m the landlord.”

Gordon’s face went as pale as it was conceivably able to. Benrey put a hand on Gordon’s shoulder, squeezing it comfortingly. 

“What’s a landlord?” Joshua asked loudly, still captivated by this strange man.

“It means he owns the building the apartments are in.” Gordon’s voice went up an octave. “I’m so sorry, Mr. Coolatta, I-”

“It’s alright,” the landlord cut him off with a reassuring smile. “And yo-you can call me Tommy.”

“Oh, uh, okay, Tommy?” Gordon laughed nervously. “It’s...Um...It’s nice to meet you?”

“You-You too.”

Joshua was getting bored sitting there. He wanted to keep running and exploring, not listen to the adults talk. So, he began to look around while his father and Tommy continued to talk.

Benrey stepped out from behind Gordon, hands shoved in the pockets of his sweatpants. “So, uh, Feetman said-”

“Don’t call me that in front of our landlord!” Gordon hissed, swatting at Benrey’s shoulder.

This didn’t seem to deter Benrey in the slightest as he kept going. “Feetman said you didn’t rent to people with kids. Why’d you let us in?”

"We-Well, you just seemed so desperate,” Tommy replied. “It did-didn’t feel right to turn you away.”

“Thank you again, Mr. Coo- Tommy,” Gordon quickly corrected himself. “I really appreciate you letting us rent here.”

“It’s no problem,” Tommy assured him.

“So, uh, how much do I owe you for the first month’s rent?” Gordon asked, digging out a notepad. 

As the three adults began to hash out the first rent payment of the month, Joshua spotted a flash of black in the bushes. Curious, he crept over. As he got closer, a cat emerged from the foliage. It was a slender tuxedo cat, its fur sleek and glossy. It almost looked like it was wearing a little suit with the way its fur was patterned. It looked up at Joshua with piercing blue eyes that almost seemed to glow. 

Joshua reached for it, transfixed by its gaze. There was a strange intelligence to the way it looked at him. As if it were somehow....human.

“Joshie!” 

At the sound of Gordon’s voice, the cat turned tail and ran, disappearing into the shrubbery once more. 

“Joshie!” Gordon repeated. “We’re going to start unloading the truck!”

“You gotta stake out your room or else we’ll steal the best one,” Benrey added with a grin. 

“Hey! No fair!” Joshua protested. 

He ran back to his father and Benrey, the cat momentarily forgotten. 

Tommy, however, watched the bushes with a solemn expression. As the three new tenants began to unload their belongings, he disappeared into the woods outside the apartments, following the lead of the cat.

.

Joshua spent the next few weeks meeting the other residents of the Pink Palace. 

Downstairs were Mr. Bubby and Mr. Coomer. They were married and had been in the circus together when they’d been young. Bubby was constantly boasting about his fire-breathing act and often still attempted to set things on fire, much to Tommy’s dismay. Coomer was still incredibly buff, even at his age, and could often be found chopping wood for Bubby to use in his little arson attempts. The whole fire thing was enough to make Gordon wary, so Joshua mostly only visited them when Gordon didn’t know about it. 

Upstairs was Darnold. He was a high school chemistry teacher, although he didn’t want to do any cool experiments with explosions. Still, he was pretty fun to hang out with because he knew a lot of cool stuff about science. Even if he didn’t want to do explosion experiments, he was still happy to lead Joshua in some safer ones. Joshua got dropped off at his apartment a lot to be babysat while his father and Benrey worked because Darnold was the most normal and stable of the other tenants. Not to mention it was summer, so Darnold didn’t need to be at the school.

Next door was Forzen, who Joshua had only seen once. He was an ex-soldier and a bit of a shut-in. Joshua had been told to leave him alone. 

And then there was Tommy. Tommy lived in a different house away from the Pink Palace, coming by every day to check on everyone. He was by far the coolest person Joshua had ever met, aside from Darnold and his dad and Benrey, and his dog was awesome. Sunkist was big enough for Joshua to ride! Tommy had let Joshua ride her a few times and it had been amazing.

But as awesome as Tommy was, there were certain things about him that were...strange. Whenever he thought other people weren’t watching, Joshua had noticed that his expression became strangely solemn. And he always seemed sad whenever he was around Joshua, even though he tried to hide it. 

Not to mention, Joshua had seen him talking to the cat he’d seen on his first day at the Pink Palace. It always happened on the outskirts of the property, with Tommy crouched down and the cat half-hidden by the bushes.

“Whose cat is it?” Joshua asked Darnold one day after he’d been dropped off at the man’s apartment for the day.

“I’m...not sure what you mean,” Darnold said, looking up from the vegetables he’d been cutting. He was making a stir fry for both of them for lunch, which meant his usual bowtie and sweater vest combo had been removed and his shirtsleeves were rolled up to his elbows. 

“There’s a cat I see sometimes. It’s black and white and it’s got these really pretty blue eyes,” Joshua explained. “Whose cat is it?”

Darnold hummed, frowning slightly. “I don’t think it really belongs to anyone. It just....” He gestured vaguely with his free hand. “Lives in the woods and shows up sometimes. No one’s sure where it came from. Tommy takes care of it sometimes, though.”

Now it was Joshua’s turn to frown. “So you don’t know anything about it?”

“Nope.”

“Uuuugh.” Joshua groaned, sinking down on Darnold’s couch.

“Sorry.” Darnold smiled apologetically.

“Well, do you at least know why Mr. Coolatta doesn’t let people with kids live here?” 

“Also no.”

Joshua groaned again, sinking further into the couch.

“I always figured it was due to some safety hazard,” Darnold said, returning to his cutting of vegetables. “Although, Bubby and Coomer say that that rule was in place even when Tommy’s father owned the place.”

This piqued Joshua’s interest. The first thing that ran through his mind was that there was some sort of conspiracy going on here. Some hidden secret. 

Maybe it had to do with the weird door little he’d seen in the living room. The one that led to a brick wall and was only opened with a key shaped like a button. Gordon had figured it had probably connected the room that was their living room to whatever the correlating room in Forzen’s apartment was and had been bricked up when the house had been made into apartments. A simple enough explanation. But Joshua didn’t quite believe it.

Something was going on here.

Joshua had to find out what it was.

This turned out to be harder than Joshua had expected. Darnold didn’t know anything about the door or the rule, as he’d learned, he couldn’t talk to Forzen, and when he’d asked Tommy, the landlord had reacted rather strangely. 

“Oh, w-well, you know,” Tommy had said with a nervous laugh. “Sa-Safety hazards an-and all that. Oh, would you lo-look at the time!” He’d then turned and absolutely sprinted away, not even answering the question about the door.

Which left Bubby and Coomer. 

Joshua stood at the top of the stairs leading down to their apartment, a notebook clutched to his chest. Both his father and Benrey were out at work, so no one was there to stop him. Taking a deep breath, he marched down the stairs and knocked on the door.

Almost immediately, the door was opened, revealing the beaming face of one Doctor Harold Pontiff Coomer. Coomer was not a tall man, but he was a big one. He looked like a teddy-bear come to life while wearing long-sleeves. But when those long sleeves came off, one could see properly how Coomer was built like a brick wall.

“Ah, hello Joshua!” Coomer said brightly.

“Hello, Mr. Coomer,” Joshua said, drawing himself up to his full height, which was not all that tall. “I’ve got some questions I wanna ask.”

“Questions?” Coomer repeated, amusement flickering in his eyes.

“Mm-hm!” Joshua nodded resolutely, holding his notebook to his chest.

“What sorts of questions?” Coomer asked. 

Joshua was about to answer until Bubby’s voice came from deeper in the apartment. “Who is it?!”

“It’s Joshua!” Coomer called back without missing a beat. “The boy from upstairs!”

“He’s still alive?” There was some shuffling and Bubby appeared, wearing a faded blue bathrobe and squinting at Joshua over the top of his incredibly thick glasses. 

“Why wouldn’t I be alive?” Joshua asked.

“There’s a monster here that eats kids,” Bubby answered matter-of-factly. “Would’ve thought it’d have put its little feelers out by now.”

“A monster?” Joshua’s eyes widened, all thoughts of the little door gone.

“Yeah, why do you think they don’t rent to kids?” Bubby folded his arms. “Monster. Eats kids.”

“So Mister Tommy knows?” 

“But of course!” Coomer replied. “His father never let him come near this place when he was a child for fear young Tommy would be snapped up!”

“And there’s no way Greg didn’t tell the kid about it when he took over running the place,” Bubby added.

Joshua nodded, scribbling this information down. 

He’d known something was going on! 

“What do you know about the monster?” Joshua demanded, his face screwed up in adorable determination.

“Not much.” Bubby shrugged. “It’s weird, it eats kids, got a thing for buttons I think.”

“It lures you in by giving you everything you could possibly want.” Coomer’s expression was suddenly dark, his voice low and solemn. “It grants your heart’s deepest desires and then it steals away everything that makes you you. It eats your life and drains your soul until there is nothing left but an empty husk.”

There was a long pause as both Bubby and Joshua stared at Coomer. 

“Jesus Christ, Harold,” Bubby finally said. 

“Or so I’ve heard!” Coomer’s bright expression and peppy tone immediately returned. “So don’t go following any strange button-eyed creatures!”

Joshua nodded slowly, clutching his notebook to his chest like a safety blanket.

Thankfully, his attention was drawn away by the sound of his father’s voice. “Joshie? Joshie where are you?” 

“I gotta go,” Joshua announced, looking back at Bubby and Coomer. “Thank you for your valuable information.”

“Don’t get eaten!” Bubby yelled after him as he ran away. “You see any spider looking fucks, you set them on fire!”

Gordon was standing on the porch in front of their door, looking slightly panicked as he scanned the lawn to see if he could locate Joshua. Benrey had a hand on Gordon’s shoulder, rubbing his thumb in circles on Gordon’s shirt. Gordon visibly relaxed when he saw Joshua running up. 

“There you are, bud.” He knelt and opened his arms, allowing Joshua to run into them. “You had me really worried. I couldn’t find you anywhere.”

“Sorry, Dad,” Joshua mumbled. “Just wanted to ask Mr. Bubby and Mr. Coomer some stuff.”

“What kinda stuff?” Benrey asked, leaning against the doorframe. 

“I wanted to know why Mr. Tommy doesn’t let people with kids live here,” Joshua said. “Mr. Darnold said it’s been that way since Mr. Tommy’s dad owned the house.”

“And did they have an answer for you?” Gordon asked as he picked Joshua up. 

Joshua lit up, nodding enthusiastically. “Yeah! They said there’s a monster that eats kids and that’s why Mr. Tommy and Mr. Tommy’s dad don’t want kids here!”

“That’s an interesting story,” Gordon said with a somewhat unsure smile.

“If there’s a monster, why’d he rent to us?” Benrey asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Tommy did say we seemed desperate.” Gordon’s smile slipped a bit.

“It’s okay, Dad.” Joshua put his little hands on the sides of his father’s face, staring at him with an adorably determined expression. “If I meet any monsters, I’ll kick their butts.” 

Gordon blinked, then laughed softly and kissed Joshua’s forehead. “Of course.”

“I’m a cowboy! I’ll kick their butts!” Joshua insisted as Gordon carried him inside.

“Hell yeah you will.” Benrey agreed, following them inside.

Gordon sighed, although he couldn’t help but smile while he did. “Don’t encourage him, Benrey.”

Dinner that night was spaghetti, which Joshua couldn’t help but complain about a little. It was just noodles and store bought sauce, both of which were rather bland. 

“I’m sorry, bud.” Gordon smiled wearily. “I’m just kind of tired.”

“You’re always tired,” Joshua grumbled, sinking lower in his chair. 

Gordon got very quiet after that. Benrey immediately jumped in to fill the silence with his rambling about PlayStation, but Joshua could tell he’d struck a nerve. 

That night, after he was supposed to have gone to bed, he crept to his bedroom door to listen to his father and Benrey talking from the living room. 

“I’m a horrible dad,” Joshua heard Gordon mumble. It sounded like he’d been crying. “I’m ruining his life and he’s going to hate me when he’s older.”

“You’re doing the best you can, bro,” Benrey replied.

“But is it good enough?” Gordon demanded. “You heard him! I’m always tired!”

“Yeah, well, busting your ass 24/7 is gonna do that to you.”

“I’m not giving him the kind of life he deserves, Benrey! He’s only eight and we’ve already had to move twice!”

“You’re doing the best you can,” Benrey’s voice grew soft, barely audible through the door. “And even if you can’t always be there, he knows you love him, Gordon.”

There was a loud sniffle, likely from Gordon. 

“Thanks, Benrey.”

“No prob, dude. Now.” The creak of someone, presumably Benrey, getting up from the couch. “I’m gonna go get you some water and check on the little dude, okay?”

“Okay.” 

Joshua scrambled to get back in bed, hiding under his covers to pretend he was sleeping. He could hear Benrey’s footsteps coming closer, then the door opening. Joshua laid as still as he possibly could, trying to keep his breathing even.

There was a beat of silence, then, “I know you’re awake, kiddo.”

“How’d you know?” Joshua popped up.

“You and Gordo snore real loud when you’re actually asleep,” Benrey said as he leaned on the doorframe. He’d turned on the lights, illuminating the room and his smirk.

“I do not snore,” Joshua huffed, folding his arms and pouting. 

“Sure, kiddo.” Benrey strode into the room. “Now, it’s past your bedtime. You gotta sleep now.”

Joshua laid back down, continuing to pout as Benrey tucked him back in. 

“Why don’t you and Dad get together?” He asked after a moment. 

Benrey froze, hands hovering over the blankets. “.....Huh?”

Joshua stared up at him, his expression earnest and full of youthful sincerity.

“I know you guys like each other,” Joshua said. “So why don’t you get together?”

“It’s...complicated, little man.” Benrey started playing with the tassels on his hat. 

“But you guys love each other!”

“Your dad’s been hurt by people he loved before.”

Joshua fell silent. 

He knew exactly who Benrey was referring to.

Joshua knew virtually nothing about the man that was his other biological father. All he knew was that Gordon and this man had dated and the two of them had wanted to have a child together. Joshua. But when Joshua had actually been born, the man had skipped down, leaving Gordon alone with his newborn baby. 

“Shifty bastard’s lucky I haven’t seen him since he pulled that stunt,” Joshua had heard Barney say once to Benrey after Gordon had gone to bed. “Otherwise I would’ve kicked his teeth in.” 

The Calhoun brothers had a lot of feelings about Gordon’s former partner and absolutely none of them were positive, although they tried not to talk too much about him while Gordon was around. 

Joshua himself didn’t particularly care about the man and seldom spared him a passing thought. Except when his dad was in pain. Then he thought about the man and wondered why he would leave Gordon all alone like this. 

“But you’re not like him,” Joshua insisted. 

“That doesn’t mean he’s not gonna be scared,” Benrey said, his voice soft. “When you’ve been burned like that...The fear never goes away.”

“So...Is he just gonna be miserable forever?” Joshua started to tear up. He didn’t want his dad to be miserable.

“Not forever. He just needs some time. He’ll be okay, I promise,” Benrey assured him, ruffling Joshua’s hair. 

“...Are you gonna make sure he’s okay?”

“Yep. I’m kinda like a superhero, y’know? Keeping your dad safe from the shadows.”

Joshua giggled at Benrey’s attempt to look cool, his fears assuaged for the moment.

“Sleep well, bud.” Benrey kissed Joshua’s forehead and exited the room, closing the door behind him.

Joshua rolled over in bed, snuggling up under his blankets. Soon enough, he was fast asleep.

He was awoken hours later by what sounded like claws scrabbling on hardwood. He sat up, looking blearily around. The room was dark and the house was quiet. Aside from the claws on the wood, that was.

“Dad?” Joshua called out. “Benrey?”

There was no response. 

Frowning, Joshua picked up the flashlight he kept next to his bed and put on his cowboy hat. His cowboy hat always made him feel braver. He crept into the hallway, shining his flashlight around. The sounds seemed to be coming from the living room.

The living room where the teeny door was. 

Joshua walked a bit faster, sliding into the living room. There, in front of the little door, was the cat he’d seen outside. And a rat. A rat made of...cloth? The cat had the rat in its mouth, shaking it about as if trying to break the rat’s neck. In its own mouth, the rat clutched the button key to the door.

“Kitty? What are you doing in here?” Joshua asked, walking over to the cat.

The cat’s head snapped around to look at Joshua, and he got the strongest feeling that it was telling him to go back to bed. It was the same look that Gordon or Benrey gave him when they were very tired and really wanted him to just listen to them. Joshua took an instinctive step back. He hadn’t thought a cat was capable of such a human expression.

The rat took advantage of this shift in the cat’s attention to wriggle out of its mouth and through the little door with the key. Which was now open.

“Wait! You can’t take that key!” Joshua yelled, chasing after the rat without a second thought. “It’s not yours!”

The cat’s eyes widened as Joshua darted into the strange passage beyond the tiny door. It quickly followed after him, the door swinging shut behind them.

The tunnel beyond the door was.... strange. Joshua wasn’t sure why he felt like this, but he felt like he was crawling through the throat of something large. It felt....alive. He shook his head and tried to move faster. 

Soon enough, he reached the end of the tunnel, pushing out into the room beyond. 

“Umm...Hello?” Joshua stuck his head out of the doorway. It looked exactly like the room he’d left. Except...he could hear someone humming. Frowning, Joshua pulled himself out of the tunnel and got up, following the humming toward the kitchen.

Outside of the living room, the house looked different. It looked...He wasn’t sure how to describe it. It just looked...brighter. More welcoming.

“Hello?” He asked, pushing the kitchen door open. 

There was a man in the kitchen. He had his back to Joshua and was humming while he chopped something on the counter. Upon hearing Joshua enter, he turned around, revealing....

“Dad?”

The man who looked like Gordon smiled warmly. He looked almost identical to Joshua’s father, with a few key differences. This man was far more put together than Joshua was used to seeing Gordon. His orange sweater and brown slacks were immaculate, and his hair was fluffy and swept back in neat ponytail.

And he had black buttons where his eyes should have been. 

“Joshie!” The man who was not his father said, in a voice exactly like Gordon’s. “You’re just in time for dinner, bud!”

“You...You’re not my dad,” Joshua stammered, backing up. 

“I’m your Other Father,” Not Gordon explained. “Now, could could you go tell your other Other Father that dinner’s ready now?”

“My....other Other Father?” Joshua repeated weakly.

“He’s in his study,” Other Gordon said, already turning away to start presumably plating the food.

“Okay.” Joshua nodded, turning away. He still had his flashlight clutched tightly to his chest.

He wasn’t sure what Other Gordon had meant by “study”. They didn’t really have a study. The closest they had was the designated game room, which Benrey did spend a lot of time in. So, Joshua headed there.

As he got closer to the game room, he could hear the sounds of a piano being played. Joshua frowned slightly at this. The closest thing to an instrument he’d ever heard Benrey play had been a kazoo, and that had only been to bother Gordon. Although, he had heard Barney mention once that Benrey had wanted to be a musician when he’d been younger.

When Joshua opened the door to the game room, he was greeted with the sight of another Benrey sitting at a piano. Like Other Gordon, Other Benrey was far more put together. He was wearing a dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up, a blue vest, black dress pants, and a blue bowtie. His hair was slicked back against his head, as shiny as the blue buttons that constituted his eyes.

“Hey there, bud!” Other Benrey grinned upon seeing Joshua. “What’s up?”

“You can play the piano?” Joshua whispered, eyes wide with awe.

“Don’t need to. It plays me.” Other Benrey said with a wink.

A pair of gloves on mechanical arms emerged from the top of the piano, the gloves slipping on to Other Benrey’s hands and spinning him around to begin playing. Joshua almost dropped the flashlight as he scrambled forward to get a better look. It was incredible to watch Other Benrey’s fingers fly across the keys, even if it was mostly due to the gloves. 

“That’s so cool!” Joshua exclaimed when Other Benrey had finished. 

“Glad you think so, little man,” Benrey laughed, ruffling Joshua’s hair. “So, what can I do for you?”

“Oh, uh, he said to tell you that dinner’s ready,” Joshua replied, placing his cowboy hat back on his head.

“Oh hell yeah! I’m starving!” Other Benrey grinned, getting to his feet and scooping Joshua up in his arms. “We better not keep him waiting, huh?”

Joshua nodded. The anxiety he’d felt upon seeing the Other Gordon had calmed a bit with this Other Benrey, who was every bit as silly and comforting as the Benrey Joshua knew.

Other Benrey carried Joshua to the dining room, where Other Gordon was dishing up pancakes. 

“Pancakes for dinner?!” Joshua’s eyes lit up as he was set down in his chair. 

Pancakes for dinner was a rare occurrence at their house. Gordon and Benrey were always too tired to make pancakes most of the time.

“Of course,” Other Gordon said with a smile. “This is a very special occasion, which calls for a very special meal.”

“Hope you remembered the fruit, babe,” Other Benrey laughed, snaking an arm around Other Gordon’s waist and kissing him on the cheek.

“How could I forget? It’s your favorite part,” Other Gordon replied, playfully swatting at Other Benrey’s shoulder. 

“You’re together?” Joshua asked, voice small but hopeful.

“Why wouldn’t we be?” Other Benrey asked. “We love each other. 

“And we love you,” Other Gordon continued, smiling softly down at Joshua. “We’re so glad to have you here.”

Joshua couldn’t help but smile. After everything that had been going on lately...This was exactly what he’d wanted. 

Gordon and Benrey happy together, not tired or overworked, paying attention to him.

He almost didn’t want to go home. 

[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

01. It Became a Thing

AU Grace and Simon story. Takes place in the instance that they never got on the train, but crossed paths and became friends. Few things: I started the story at age 10, but will not stay there long, because I don’t necessarily want to write the length of their traumas, but I did want to at least kick off with that time period. This is being written before the season ends, so no, not canon outside of the train thing, because idk all their business like that.

2410 words and here we go...

He was pretty sure that it was fate that brought him here or something very similar, yet scientific. He didn't really believe in fate. If it was real he hated the fact that his life was meant to be this way.

This way being alone, often attacked for being a little different. None of them seem to know nor care that he was only different because he didn't really have anyone to show him there was another way to be. So, he was just the way that felt comfortable. He thought it was fine! It was fine to be the smartest kid in class, even if focusing on things made him irritated, because they weren’t the things he WANTED to focus on. He thought it was fine rambling on about books he’s writing at the age of 10. He thought it was fine, building little figures, not good expensive ones like his dad had, but like... affordable ones that didn’t work as well and made him work hard for the final product. He thought he was fine.They didn't.

Simon wasn't really in the mood to be beat up today so, he ran, and it was the most his body had ever done. The boy pushed it to the limits. He didn't know where he was going, but he was growing tired, saw a door and he went through it. He rushed into what he later realized was a school not his school, but some other school. Some fancy place. He decided not to run into the bathroom they might check there.

He kept running and running. He turned the corner and down a hallway and he heard the door open behind him. He heard their feet coming! They were following and probably would catch up! He rushed into the first next door that he saw, and that's where he met her.

She was on stage and she was dancing. He looked out of the window and saw his bullies run past the door he ducked crouched and scurried towards a seat in, what he now realized, was some type of auditorium. He'd just wait it out. His bullies would tire of searching for him and go. Maybe they'd catch him tomorrow, maybe not. But, he determined that he was not leaving the seat unless they came in...

She was wonderful. a nice distraction from his current predicament. Her limbs were elegant in their fluid movements and she danced with fierce concentration and sharpened skill. Her hair was pulled up into a bun and the skirt she wore flowed as she moved, but showed her perfect legs. Her skin was amazing too. She was... too pretty for words. He was so mesmerized, he didn't watch the door, so he didn't see when his bullies peeked in the window and noticed him slouching in a seat.

They opened the door, trying to sneak in, but, it was 4 of them. Not as stealthy as one dude in a hoodie, so she noticed them, first.

"Hey! You can't be in here!" she fussed and came storming towards the door. "This is a closed rehearsal!" She had a deeper voice than anyone expected, her being a small, though slightly tall little girl and as she made her way towards them, even though they realized that she was even smaller than he was, there was something about her that startled them.

One of them lied, "We're sorry, Little Cutie, just collecting our friend here."

Now, she noticed him. She looked at him, searching the room, looking desperately for an escape, and she knew - these weren't his friends. She may not have had any friends herself, but she had seen them before. On websites and stuff. They didn't look scared of each other. And she KNEW looking scared. She was often scared. Scared of her thoughts when she was alone, scared of the fact that she was always alone... she looked at the speaker and said, "He's with me."

The boys laughed and she went over to the blond boy and gave him a hug, "Play along," she whispered. Like she had to say that. "I’m finishing rehearsal and he’s my friend, coming to support me as I practice a very hard number."

They didn't buy it. There was no way Sci Fi Si could ever even be FRIENDS with a pretty rich girl, much less... But, she looked to be retrieving a cellphone and they didn't know the penalty for being in this school, so, they left.

She walked behind them and locked the door, just in case. "Thanks. You just saved my life." He said. She frowned at him and his smile faded.

"Are those goons gonna wait around until Midnight?"

"No. They'll just harass and/or beat me up tomorrow." He said, then looked at the ground and muttered, "I'd better bring a change of clothes." When he looked back up, she was staring at him with some confusion. "Sometimes it gets messy." Her eyes widened, but she didn't say anything. She was still just staring at him. He felt like... judging him... he didn't like it.

"How long were you in here?" she asked.

He imitated the music with his mouth, because it was all he could recall of when he sat down. He hadn't checked the time and he didn't know how long he was there or any of the stuff that he saw her do to describe it... She laughed and covered her face with both hands, "Soooo.. you saw some of my worse work. Great."

"That was your worse? It was amazing!"

"What do you know about dance?"

"Nothing but-"

"So, that's what your critique means to me. Nothing." She gave him a fake smile. he looked hurt and she hadn't meant to wound the guy, but... she didn't like for people to see her when she wasn't at her best and this guy HAD. She laughed and touched his arm, "Don't be so dramatic. Technically... it's true. It’s not an insult. You don't know anything about dance, you said so yourself. So, how could you know that I missed steps or didn't nail two moves? I was just being honest... not mean."

He blushed, looked at her hand on his hoodie and too soon, she withdrew it. "Anyway, they're probably gone and I need to get my routine flawless, so.." she unlocked the door and kicked it open, smiling at him.

"Thanks again, ummm...?"

She narrowed her eyes, confused at his weird inflection of voice, but questionably responded, "You're welcome?"

"Simon," He answered the wrong question, but gave her the answer to his anyway. She didn't realize that he was waiting on her name. She didn't know if she should share it. But, he seemed nice enough. He was wearing socks and sandals and they were worn, like he’d been in them for a while, but - he was still waiting.

"Grace Mon..." Usually, she'd say, "Grace Monroe, of the Monroe Square Monroes." But... that would be saying too much in this case.He was a kid, around her age, but he was still a stranger and could’ve had some kind of scheme going with an adult waiting nearby..

"Goodnight Gracemon," he said, genuinely and walked out. She watched him go down the hallway and turn the corner, then she chased him.

"Hey!" he turned, surprised.

"Umm... I should walk you out. At least to be sure those guys aren't outside waiting..."

If it were someone else, someone less pretty, who didn't magically smell nice, even with that undertone of sweat, he'd have asked, "What are you gonna do? Ballet them away?* but, Gracemon had been kind when he needed a save and also, she was checking on him? His mom didn't even check on him...

"And it's just Grace." she laughed awkwardly and she opened the door of the school and glanced around, "Coast looks clear. If... they're after you tomorrow... come straight in. I'll be here."

"Are you almost done?" he asked.

Now, she erupted into a fit of laughter and held her belly. Whenever she caught her breath, she just said, "No. Nowhere near. See you around." she vanished into the building and Simon looked around. It was dark. But... this is a nice neighborhood and she seems used to this... Still... it seemed wrong to leave her. Then again, he had no idea when she'd finish, she probably had a ride, AND, he needed to immediately get started on her character for his novel. Some type of stunning princess or something. Reluctantly, he headed home, with his mind full of a girl he'd just met. He had no idea how much that was gonna become part of his life. He wasn’t sure where he was, but he saw a train station. He’d never been on one by himself before, though...

Whenever he went to the booth to ask questions, he’d missed it, but there were maps, so he looked at one and figured out the way he needed to go to get home. 

Some time later whenever he came running inside, he immediately went into his parents’ room, breathing heavy and said, “Mom! I’m sorry I’m late. I ended up on the other side of town and I missed the train coming back...”

The woman took a deep breath, shut her book and looked at him. “Simon. Did you knock before you came in here?” She asked.

“No, ma’am.”

“Aren’t you supposed to?” She asked.

“Yes ma’am.”

“Yet, you didn’t.”

“I’m sorry. I’ll go now... Enjoy your book, Mom.” She watched him leave and opened her book again. He shut the door behind him and went into the kitchen. Nothing was prepared. He looked into the fridge and saw that they were apparently out of all of the casseroles that the neighbors had brought by. He pulled out a few items, sure that he could make something work with them, but... not really... He might need some help.

His father was in the garage, working on a model train. There were several photos of his little sister, hung up at his father’s work center. “Dad? Are you hungry?” he asked.

Unlike his mother, his father didn’t even glance up at him, though his tone was nice enough, “No, I’ll be fine. You can eat without me.” Simon didn’t know how to tell him that wasn’t why he asked. So, he went back into the kitchen and LUCKILY realized that there was cereal. He could do cereal! Even his sister could do cereal and she had only been... 4. Both of his parents were taking it really hard. He didn’t want to resent them or feel like they loved her more. She was gone and that was obviously painful... But he was still there... And neither of them had cared since they lost her. 

There was no peace. Not at home with these two adults that had given up on him. Not at school with those bullies. He didn’t have anywhere that he could escape. So, he threw himself into fantasy stories, and he was content to live there, if he could have. The only other place that might be better was that auditorium, across town, with the pretty ballerina... that reminded him, he had some drawing to do!

.

Whenever Grace returned to the auditorium, her instructor was there, waiting, stern faced. “Have you been practicing while I ran my errand, Grace?”

“Yes! Yes, I have.”

“Well, let’s see it, then,” the woman gestured towards the stage and Grace rushed to perform her presentation. She felt when she made the same mistakes that she had mentioned earlier to that kid, and although she kept going, it made her chest feel extremely tight to know that she messed up. At the end, the teacher sighed and suggested, “Perhaps I shouldn’t leave you for even a moment. Where were you when I came in?”

“I was walking a kid outside who had stumbled in here, running from bullies,” Grace said, cheerfully.

“Grace... What did your parents say about trying to talk your way out of hard work?”

“It really happened. Just check your footage,” Grace pointed towards the camera. 

“Very well. At any rate, from the top...”

The driver met Grace outside and she was fortunate that she didn’t have to go to school at a crowded school, because after practice, she was always so tired and her body was sore and her feet throbbed. But, not being in a school also meant not seeing other kids. And even coming to this auditorium to practice her part for a dance recital - which her parents insisted she had down pat before ever even meeting the other girls - was such a break from her typical lifestyle. She’d convinced them that she needed to practice on the stage that she would be performing on first, and even had to admit that she didn’t feel confident about dancing with other girls and that she was scared. Her parents hated that word. They translated it to laziness. They translated everything to laziness. She wasn’t “tired,” she was lazy. She wasn’t “sick.” She was lazy...

Just thinking about it made her want to get out of the car one day at a stoplight, run away and never come back. But, where would she even go? She was stuck here. This was her life. She had a recital next week with a bunch of strangers and the most that she had talked to another kid in she couldn’t even remember how long had been a fluke. She wondered if he made it home okay, though. Simon. He seemed like a really nice kid. She wanted to protect him. Wanted to get those bullies to stay away from him. She laughed a little bit, creating these scenarios of how she might rush in and save this kid and then she might have a friend! 

She sighed. Daydreaming was lazy, and she was pretty sure that she was never gonna see that kid again.

Until of course, she did. The next day. She noticed him enter this time, and she smiled brightly, but continued dancing as her instructor counted off counts. That was her best practice yet! And, her instructor even agreed that Simon could stay, as long as it didn’t distract her. Whenever she left, she took him with her and had the car bring him home. It... became a thing. She... made a friend.

Next

[lfthinkerwrites]

The Day Arrives

Title: Tales from Gotham Academy

Previous chapters: 1/2/3

Summary: The day of the field trip arrives. Pray for these poor, damned souls.

Friday, May 5th, 2019

The Day of the Field Trip

The Day of Infamy

It was a bright, sunny morning at Gotham Academy. In the parking lot in front of the school, two long buses were pulled up, with a crowd of freshmen students and their parents milling about, preparing to board. As usual, Jonathan and Jervis were among the first of the faculty to arrive, standing in front of a bus and waiting for the others to show.

"Well, here we are, old friend," Jervis said, shuffling a bit. "Another year, another horrifying trip. How bad do you suppose it's going to be this time?"

Jonathan shrugged his bony shoulders. "Well, Kerr ain't here. That's a plus."

"I'm more worried about Dormouse," Jervis muttered. "He's been in such a mood about this trip the whole week. I'm half expecting he won't show up."

"Well, you'd be wrong," Jonathan said, pointing behind them. "Here he comes now."

Indeed, Edward and Ellen walked through the growing mob of people, Ellen wearing her knapsack on her back and shaking her head. "Do you have to wear socks with your sandals, Dad? You look like a dork!"

Edward sniffed. "Well, you know how I feel about bare feet!" The father and daughter came to a stop in front of Jonathan and Jervis, and Edward gave them a nod. "Gentlemen."

Jervis politely greeted him, while Jonathan took a critical look at the tacky Hawaiian shirt and cargo shorts his friend was wearing. "Which way to Margaritaville?"

"Oh, har har," Edward bit out. He pointed at Jonathan's own chicken legs, exposed as they were thanks to his own shorts. "When was the last time those saw sunlight? The Reagan administration?"

Almost on cue, the Dent family showed up next to the Nashtons, Harvey, Gilda, and Duela. Duela made a beeline to Ellen and the girls started whispering to each other. "Jesus Christ," Harvey growled. "We're not even on the bus yet and you're already starting a fight Nashton?"

"Oh, who asked you, Harv?" Edward asked, rolling his eyes.

Harvey growled again, but Gilda put a hand on his shoulder. "Sweetheart," she said. "Mind your blood pressure."

Harvey's face softened as it only did around his wife. "I'm fine, honey."

Edward turned his attention back to his daughter. "Ellen, did you put sunscreen on before we left the house?"

Ellen looked away from her best friend to look at her father. "You saw me put some on!"

"Well, you need to put on more! You're already turning pink!" Edward pulled a bottle of sunscreen out of his pocket and squeezed some onto his hand. "Come here!"

Ellen groaned but came forward. "I hate my ginger genes," she complained. She moved to take the bottle from her father, only for him to slather it on her face himself. "Dad!" Ellen wailed. "Do you have to do this here!?"

"Oh, how horrible! A father doing his best to make sure his only child doesn't get skin cancer! Someone call the media!"

Ellen looked beseechingly at Jonathan. "Uncle Jon! Make Dad leave me alone!"

"Edward, leave the child be," Jonathan chided. "You're embarrassin' her."

Edward finished and Ellen scurried off back to Duela, who was trying and failing to stifle a laugh.

"Duela," Gilda called out. "You be sure to wear sunscreen too."

"But Mom, I tan!" Duela protested.

"Doesn't matter," Harvey said. "Put it on when we get on the bus."

"When are we getting on the buses?" Jervis asked, taking a look at the ever-growing mob. Tim Drake and Stephanie Brown appeared by Ellen and Duela and became involved in whatever conversation the girls were having. "I think all of the freshmen are just about here."

"Just waiting on Gordon to show," Jonathan said. By the other bus, he saw Victor Fries and Miguel trying to get the kids lined up. "It's damn near nine now. Aren't we supposed to leave at 9:30?"

"Jim's going over the plans for the day with the teachers who are staying at the school," Harvey explained. "He's also probably telling Bolton to go easy on the discipline."

Edward snorted. "That'll be a first!

You might as well ask Goodman to stop being over-dramatic, or Karlo to stop being pretentious-"

"Or you to stop being such an obnoxious pain in the ass!" Harvey interrupted.

Edward's face darkened, but immediately lit up when he caught sight of someone approaching. "Darling!" Penelope came up to the small group, her usual serious expression only just softening as she approached her boyfriend. "Did you come to see me off?" Edward asked.

"Yes," she admitted. "Actually, I also wanted to ask you to-"

"'Try to have a good time'? That's not happening and we know it," Edward glowered.

Penelope rolled her eyes. "Actually, I was going to ask you to try not to get into any trouble today."

"Me? Get into trouble? I am a paragon of virtue! A role model for the children to aspire to!"

"You threw a big hissy tantrum the other day when the vending machine in the teacher's lounge ran out of orange soda," Jonathan drawled.

"After it already ate my money, Jonathan!"

Penelope shook her head, then grabbed gently onto Edward's hand, drawing him away from the group a few feet. "If you're right and this Mockridge is at the park," she said in a low tone. "Than he's probably going to try to bait you into a fight. Just for today, ignore it. Be the bigger man."

Edward huffed. "Fine. For you and Ellen, I'll try."

Penelope smiled softly at him then. "Are you sure you don't want me to come with you? I'm sure Jonathan or Jervis would be more than happy to trade places."

"No," Edward said, kissing her hand. "One of us deserves to get through this day with their sanity intact. Just promise me that you won't get involved in whatever mischief the Sirens have planned for the day."

"Have I ever?" she asked with a bemused expression on her face.

"No, but they'll try."

While the two had their conversation, Ellen watched them with an intent expression on her face. Duela gently elbowed her. "You think she might become your stepmom?"

Ellen shrugged. "Maybe."

"Where are you on the little brother or sister front?"

"I asked Dad again on Christmas if I could have one for my Birthday and he turned really pink and wouldn't talk about it." Ellen pouted. "I'm probably not gonna get one until college at this rate."

Tim scoffed. "Ellen, trust me. Siblings are overrated."

"Nashton!" Harvey called. "Jim's coming! Get back here!"

Edward's face darkened, but he and Penelope came to rejoin the group just as Gordon, trailed as always by Kristen, made his way through the crowd. As soon as got to the front of the bus, he cleared his throat and began to speak. "Good morning everybody! In just a few minutes, we'll be taking off, so we need all students to line up single file in front of one of these buses."

"Speaking of," Jervis pointed out, turning to his friends and colleagues. "We're all getting on this bus, right?"

"As long as Neil isn't on it we are," Jonathan replied.

"Where is Neil?" Jervis asked, taking a quick look around. "I haven't seen him or Basil yet."

"Maybe we got lucky and they called out," Harvey muttered. "Or they murdered each other."

"Harvey," Gilda lightly scolded.

Penelope shook her head. "Neil and Karlo on the trip together? What was Gordon thinking allowing that to happen?"

A loud whistle blew, interrupting Gordon while he was still addressing the crowd of students and their parents. The crowd turned as one and saw Neil at the school's entrance, in front of a portion of the school's marching band, dressed in a spiffy summer outfit and waving a baton around. He led out the band to an instrumental rendition of 76 Trombones, a wide smile on his face the whole time.

Jonathan pinched the bridge of his nose. "Jesus. Tap-dancing. Christ."

"Well," Edward said. "If nothing else, Neil certainly knows how to make an entrance."

Neil continued up to the second bus, the children falling into a single-file line behind him. As soon as he was at the front, he turned and bowed to the marching band. "Thank you, boys and girls! Enjoy your day today!" The band dispersed and the assembled crowd broke out into loud applause.

Basil Karlo chose that moment to make his appearance. He walked up next to Neil, looked at his outfit and sniffed. "Not bad. For a rank amateur."

Neil's face turned bright red. He looked like he was about to say something when Gordon spoke up again. "Anyway. We'll be arriving back on campus at 5 pm. Parents, please be here to pick up your kids. That being said, it's time to board." The students by the first bus finally began to line up after saying their goodbyes to their parents and guardians.

Ellen and Duela, by virtue of being daughters of faculty members, were the first to board. "Save me a window seat, Duela!" Ellen called after her friend as they scrambled aboard.

"Ellen, don't run!" Edward called after her. Tim and Stephanie followed their friends onto the bus. Soon, the last students had boarded and it was time for the staff to go. Jonathan and Jervis climbed aboard, while Edward and Harvey both turned to their significant others for their final goodbyes.

"Great. A day at a theme park with these nuts," Harvey grumbled.

Gilda leaned up on her tiptoes to give him a kiss. "Don't let it get too you too much, Harvey. Try to have fun with Duela today."

Harvey smiled at his wife, then got aboard.

"Remember what we talked about, Edward," Penelope said, lightly squeezing his hand. "Try not to get into trouble."

"Well, I can't speak for my illustrious colleagues, but I promise that I won't start anything," he said. He leaned in a bit closer. "In the meantime, I had a few more ideas of what you could do to reward me."

Penelope fondly rolled her eyes. "Reward you for behaving like you're supposed to? Really?"

Edward mock-pouted, only to catch someone approaching from the corner of his eye. "Oh no."

Penelope was about to ask him what was wrong, only for Harley's voice to interrupt. "Hiya, Eddie!" She bounded up to give him a hug. Selina and Pamela showed up as well, both of them looking at the bus with a smirk.

Edward groaned. "What are you three doing here? Come to rub it in one last time?"

"Actually, I needed to speak to them," Gordon said. He turned to address Selina. "So we're all clear on the schedule for the day?"

"Half-day classes, final bell at 12:30, kids in detention out by 2:30, clubs and activities out by 3:00, stay on campus until you get back and help with pickup," Selina rattled off. "Crystal clear."

Gordon nodded. "Good. Remember, Strange will be leaving campus at 12:30 for a meeting with members of the school board. Kristen, of course, will help out with anything you might need." His look turned grave. "Keep an eye on Bolton, but don't start anything with him. Understand?"

Pamela scoffed. "You should be telling him not to start anything with us."

"I did, as a matter of fact," Gordon said. "Alright, I think that's everything. Kristen, give me status updates every hour until school's out. Ladies, try not to have too much fun." He turned and walked towards the second bus to help them with boarding, leaving Edward with the Sirens.

"This is gonna be great!" Harley said, throwing her arms around Kristen and Penelope's shoulders. "After Strange leaves, we're gonna have a girl's day in the chem lab!"

Edward grimaced. "And just what nonsense does that entail?"

Pamela let out a cold laugh. "Wouldn't you like to know."

Edward's face fell, and Penelope shook off Harley's grip to reassure him. "I'm sure it'll be fine," she said.

"Relax Eddie, we'll take care of your girl," Selina teased.

"That's what I'm afraid of," Edward ground out.

Penelope rolled her eyes. "You're all ridiculous."

"Edward!" Jonathan called out. "Are you getting on board or do Dent and I have to drag your ass on?"

"I'm coming!" Edward snapped. He took one last look at his girlfriend and the Sirens and shuddered. "Remember me fondly."

Harley just gave him a cheeky wave. "Bye, Eddie! See you in the funny papers!"

Edward waved back, then took a deep breath and boarded. Gordon came back to the bus and gave the women a wave before he climbed on. The bus door closed and the remaining crowd of people took a step back as the buses started. The first bus pulled out of the parking lot, followed by the second bus. In a matter of moments, the buses had passed the main gate and were on their way to Mt. Olympus theme park.

God help them all.

[thehikingviking]

East Barnard Peak (13,714 ft), Mt Barnard (13,990 ft) & Trojan Peak (13,947 ft) via George Creek

Mt Barnard had been on my radar for several years as it is one of the highest peaks in California. At 13,990 ft high, it barely misses out on the California 14er status. However, a mere 10 feet easily falls within possible measurement error tolerance, so it may be a 14er after all. Most people combine Mt Barnard with Trojan Peak, another SPS listed summit. I had a plan to add one more nugget into the equation and climb the east peak of Mt Barnard as a bonus. East Barnard Peak is a neglected 13er that gets very little attention because it doesn’t have an official name. I find these ignored yet statistically notable peaks very attractive. I proposed this trip as a CMC outing over the 4th of July weekend, but no one signed up for the trip. Asaka agreed to join me and she was all I needed. As the trip approached, I considered cancelling due to the high amount of snow in the Sierra Nevada and car issues. We already had a creek crossing stop us once this year, and I was afraid George Creek might be impassable at certain sections. After much deliberation, I figured we would probably be okay since most people use George Creek as a spring route. As for my Jeep, it had a blown head gasket and was in the shop with the new parts on back order. I was able to borrow my dad’s 2WD Toyota Rav 4, however the start of the route was at the end of a 4WD road. I wasn’t sure if we would be able to make it to the entrance of the canyon, but I hoped we could get close.

I picked up our permit in the night box at the Lone Pine Ranger Station, but in retrospect getting a permit for George Creek is a silly obligation. The chances of a ranger being up George Creek seems extremely low. I was very concerned with the capability of my vehicle as we approached via a series of dirt roads just south of Manzanar. We crossed the lower reaches of George Creek with no issues. and headed southwest from Highway 395. After a suspenseful drive, we reached the turnoff with Foothill Rd, which was the other way people access George Creek from. I felt the Rav 4 was near its limits, so I drove a little further and parked at a flat spot. I could drive no further even if I wanted to as the road became rougher. We were only a mile from the entrance of the canyon, so I accepted the extra distance for a guarantee of not getting stuck. 

The next morning we started towards the mouth of the canyon. I was surprised to find bear tracks on the sandy road. What brings them down to the desert?

After a mile we reached the campground at the end of the road. No one was parked here so it looked like we would have the whole canyon to ourselves.

I was very anxious to investigate the water levels and found them high and fast. I read in a trip report that one should first stay on the right side of the river for 200 yards before crossing, however this option was not viable. The best advice I can give for George Creek is to ignore all other past trip reports, stay close to the water, do not climb out of the canyon and only cross when you have to.

We crossed the creek immediately after passing through the campsite over a sketchy log. Then we followed the creek upstream through the recently burned area. I’m not sure if the burn helped clear the area at all, but if it did then I assume not by much. There were a few cairns here and there, but its best to just ignore them and head upstream.

There were remnants of an old trail which we followed when possible. Hiking through this burnt mess felt a little bizarre. Asaka trusted that I knew where I was going. We made our third crossing where the creek braided. I jumped first to the island and then to the other side, thinking it was the easiest crossing so far. Asaka lacked focus for a split second and had a misstep. She fell into the creek and got soaked. I gave her a few minutes to dry off and recuperate, then we continued.

There were several times where I considered hiking up out of the canyon to avoid an obstacle, but I remembered the guidance from past climbers and fought the urge to do so. Just when I thought there was a dead end I would find a way to cross.

We reached a small waterfall which I’ve seen in so many pictures, but I wasn’t able to get a good photo of it. There was a spooky cave next to the falls that I did not want to go near. We backtracked slightly and crossed beneath the fall.

I finally got my feet wet on my seventh (and final) crossing. I thought I could make it across but my foot slipped into the creek.

Asaka was smarter than me and used her sandals for the whole morning section.

I found an clearing in the forest to wring out my socks in the sunlight. Even though we had been hiking for several hours, I checked my GPS and found that we had barely hiked any distance at all. It was okay though because I thought that we were done with the worst of the route finding. East Barnard Peak was now visible.

We walked up the canyon following a use trail, but the trail disappeared at a rocky outcropping. At first I started to climb up, but the climbing became more and more difficult. It then dawned upon me that the bushwhacking probably wasn’t over. I remembered the advice once more and told Asaka that we needed to stay close to the river. Upon descending, I knocked down a huge rock that luckily missed Asaka. We found a faint use trail that disappeared under some tree branches. We hugged the side of a rock wall and thrashed alongside the creek. I found an abandoned gear stash hanging on the wall here.

There was one sketchy class 3 move that had us traverse the side of a rock band 15 feet above the creek. After that we continued thrashing our way through. I found the occasional cairn, but wondered if taking a higher path would have been easier.

I did not find any grow sites like previous parties had, although I could see why someone would put one here. I found an interesting plant that had some reddish growth on the leaves. I thought this candy coating was interesting, but resisted tasting it, figuring it was probably some type of fungus.

We finally emerged from the other side of the bushwhack and rested in the shade. From here the terrain was much more open and I expected much easier route finding.

We stayed on the south side of the creek above the willows. At times there are several parallel use trails that head up the canyon, but there is no right answer. My philosophy was to prioritize distance over elevation.

The ruggedness of the route and heat of the day started to wear us out.

We filled up water at a creek which came straight from a snowfield above. The water here wouldn’t require any filtering.

I initially wanted to camp at the tarn at 10,900 ft, however our pace was becoming too slow. I urged Asaka to hike faster, but it was for naught. We had one more tricky creek crossing which came down from the tarn above Vacation Pass right before the first potential camp location.

We reached camp at about 4pm, and Asaka did not want to continue any further. It appeared that the altitude was getting to her. I warned her that camping here would add an extra 2,000 feet of gain to our summit day, but her decision was made. She crawled in the tent and took a nap while I red my Chakra Therapy book. She woke up an hour later feeling much better than before. In retrospect, it was probably the right choice to set an early camp. I made a fire and Asaka cooked dinner.

There was plenty of wood to keep our fire going, which kept the bugs away. I walked out to the clearing in the canyon several times to go pee and look at the views.

Doing the math in my head, I realized that the following day would be very strenuous, estimating over 6,500 ft of total gain. We were capable, but I wasn’t looking forward to it. I went to bed nervous.

The next morning we broke camp a little after 5am. We followed a light use trail through the sage brush up towards the North Fork of George Creek.

I took a nature break at the top of the small ridge above camp. I blame it on the coffee I had with breakfast. I spent the next few minutes trying to catch up with Asaka who I sent ahead.

The trail petered out however it was not very helpful anymore. Most parties head north somewhere around this section to head to Mt Williamson, however we stayed on the southern slopes of the canyon.

We made it to the tarn before 7am, slightly ahead of schedule. We took a long break here and topped off our water bottles.

We now turned our focus to the big snowfield ahead of us.

We brought MICROspikes instead of our crampons. The snow was already soft and the spikes were slipping more than I wanted. They definitely were not as solid as crampons, but it was a trade off with pack weight. Asaka led the section with high confidence gained from her recent Mt Rainier summit.

We took a short rest on a dry patch of dirt, knowing we still had a lot of gain ahead of us.

We stayed towards the left side of the hourglass. The incline started to become very steep, however the snow was sun cupped, giving us almost a natural snow staircase to climb.

We paused to take off our MICROspikes at the top of the snowfield. Mt Williamson was visible to the north.

Trojan Peak stood to our northwest.

Mt Barnard stood to our west.

East Barnard Peak stood to our southwest.

Oh, what a pain it would be to climb all three in one day. I prioritized East Barnard Peak first, and we aimed for the snow free band of rocks ahead of us. We found a water source on the way and topped off our waters once more. We would need every drop. Asaka was feeling strong, so she left me in her dust. She beat me to the top by several minutes.

I slowly marched along the top of the ridge to meet her at the summit. I heard some rock fall in the distance, but couldn’t see any dust or movement. I had service along the ridge and received a text from my dad. He asked me if I felt the earthquake, which I did not. I didn’t consider that the rock fall I heard may have been the result of an aftershock.

I met Asaka on the summit. One down, two to go. To the south were Tunnabora Peak, Mt Carillon, Mt Russell and Mt Whitney. 

To the southwest was the Kaweah Range.

To the northwest were Mt Barnard and Mt Tyndall.

To the north were Trojan Peak and Mt Williamson.

Both Asaka and I agreed that our ki levels were high enough to continue to Mt Barnard. Following the ridge down to the saddle didn’t appear to provide any benefits, so we decided instead to descend the steep snowfield right below us. The conditions were not ideal, so we put our MICROspikes back on and carefully walked down.

There were too many sun cups to glissade. At the end of the snowfield, I parked my butt on some rocks and waited for Asaka. We took off our MICROspikes once more, then headed up the class 2 talus slopes of Mt Barnard.

There is really nothing to say about this section. It was a talus slog for about 1,000 vertical feet.

Knowing that I still had to do Trojan Peak afterwards, I pushed myself a lot harder that I normally do. I started feeling chest pains, which I kept to myself. I slowed my pace and focused on breathing. I methodically trudged to the summit. This peak has great views. To the east was East Barnard Peak.

To the south was Mt Whitney.

To the southwest was the Kaweah Range.

To the west was the Great Western Divide.

To the north was Mt Tyndall.

To the northeast were Mt Williamson and Trojan Peak.

We were feeling pretty haggard, but we still had one more summit to reach before I could feel satisfied. All the reports I read said to not follow the ridgeline. Instead, we dropped down the northeast slopes of the peak, hiking down across a big pile of boulders until we reached a snow field.

This snowfield was severely sun cupped and the progress was quite slow. I wondered if I should have gone lower and avoided the snow field all together.

While it felt like an eternity, we eventually made it across. We hiked over the patches of snow to the snow free line of rocks which angled towards the west side of the peak.

Right before I could reach the snow free area, I post holed all the way to my hip. My boot got stuck and I couldn’t free myself. I couldn’t move an inch no matter how hard I pulled. I urgently called for help from Asaka and she dug me out with her ice ax. I had started to get cold in just the few minutes of sitting there. What if I was all alone?

We climbed the class 3 rock band until we reached a cornice.

This wave of snow looked intimidating, but we took it straight on.

We were now on the summit ridge. Mt Versteeg and Mt Tyndall were just a short distance away. I initially wanted to somehow combine the outing with Mt Versteeg, however we were running low on daylight and energy.

The final climb was another talus pile.

The remaining climb never exceeded class 2 and we reached the summit prior to 3:30pm. I took off my shoes and lounged on the summit. To the east was Owens Valley.

To the south was East Barnard Peak across the bowl.

To the southwest was Mt Barnard.

To the northwest were West Tyndall Peak, Mt Tyndall and Mt Versteeg.

To the north were Mt Keith and Mt Williamson.

We somehow did it, and we also had enough time to make it down before dark. We dropped off the south side of the peak, glissading down a very steep section of snow. We then took long strides across sandy slopes until reaching the top of the hourglass. We started off too far to the left and found the snow too steep for comfort. We traversed right to our ascent route and plunge stepped and glissaded the rest of the way to the tarn. We stopped at the outlet of the tarn where I filled my waters and stripped off all my clothes. I wanted my wet clothing to dry, and Asaka found humor in my vulnerable state. I considered jumping in the water, but thought better of it. I didn’t want to further agitate my heart after having chest pains earlier in the day. We stayed by the tarn until shade from East Barnard Peak began to envelop us. We followed the same path down to camp.

I spotted a lone deer down by the creek.

I found a series of holes on our way down. These did not seem like a prospect, but they also didn’t seem natural. Why would someone dig a series of holes all the way up here. Perhaps it was bigfoot sign.

At last camp was visible beneath us. We scampered down to the patch of forest to our undisturbed camp.

I made another fire and we enjoyed dinner. It was nice knowing we had the whole canyon to ourselves. As we finished up our meal, the ground started shaking. I looked at Asaka and told her to be ready to run. I listened intently for rockfall, but the granite walls of the canyon held together throughout the intense tremor. This earthquake ended up having a magnitude of 7.1 and the epicenter was less than 100 miles away near Ridgecrest. The earthquake that my dad texted me about earlier that morning was the foreshock, which had a magnitude of 6.4.

We made it through the night with no major after shocks. The next morning Asaka made some chocolate chip pancakes over the fire.

We began our hike out armed with the knowledge we acquired from two days prior.

I stopped for a while hoping to fish George Creek, but I somehow forgot my line. I don’t think I would have caught anything anyway. The creek was just constant white water.

On our hike out, we found a way to only cross the creek 5 times, and for two of those crossings we found a better location to cross.

On the second to last crossing, the log I was standing on broke and I fell waist deep into the creek. I was totally fine, and if anything it was quite refreshing, however this freaked out Asaka. She couldn’t bring herself to cross the creek and I became annoyed over the fact that she wouldn’t trust me. This led to a fight between us, and after some back and forth, I finally got her across.

With our feet already wet, we walked across a braided section of the creek for the last crossing of the trip and made it out to the campground at the mouth of the canyon.

The last mile across the desert to the car felt nice with a wet lower half. We still had one more day on our extended Fourth of July weekend, which we spent recuperating at home.

[wheredidalltheusersgo]

Gator mutant geoff, future geoff, and dad geoff!

First post of the day!