#he sounded so disappointed in himself too like idk if someone said smthn 2 him or if he saw smthn online abt it

[boimgfrog]

bf today was like "man it's fucked up how I fetishize you...sorry for talking so much about how excited I am for you to get a t dick when you go on hormones, I'm sorry if that made you uncomfortable" and I was like?!??@?!?!??!?@?@? NOOO NO NO NO PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME THAT YOULL FIND MY DICK INSANELY ATTRACTIVE PLEASE LLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEEEEE TALK ABOUT HOW HOT IT IS PLEASEEEEE

[esseastri]

Megan Reads Oathbringer (part 3)

Didn’t even stop for food; that part was just getting so long.

Part Three encompasses pages 144-240 (previous parts)

I promise I’m not going to stop each liveblog part every time I get to a Shallan chapter. I promise. 

OH MY GOSH I’M LAUGHING SO HARD I CAN’t BREATHE

SHALLAN ASSUMING THE KNOCK ON HER DOOR IS PALONA NAD ADOLIN WALKS IN

1. ADOLIN BROUGHT HER DINNER WHAT A SWEETIE

2. SHE’S IN HER FRIKKIN NIGHTGOWN

3. HE ALMOS DROPS HER DINNER BECAUSE OH NO HER SAFEHAND

I’M DYING THIS IS FRIKKIN HILARIOUS I LOVE ADOLIN SO MUCH I LOVE ADOLIN AND SHALLAN TOGETHER THIS IS TOO FUNNY

“In my defense, you did invite me in!” SHOUTING THROUGH THE DOOR LIKE A GRINNING FOOL I LOVE THEM??

“Back of your left thigh, eh? What’s a girl gotta do to sneak a glimpse of that?” SAYS THE WOMAN WHO JUST FREAKED OUT AND WRAPPED HER SAFEHAND IN THREE LAYERS OF CLOTH WHILE BLUSHING FURIOUSLY TWO SECONDS AGO OMG THESE NERDS

He’s so genuine in how much he likes her. hello, fronds, I LOVE THEM

“Your ego doesn’t count as a separate individual, Shallan.” GOD BLESS

Pattern + math jokes = Good

The fact that both Pattern and Syl have been “studying” um...mating. is REALLY HILARIOUS

otp: NO MATING

THAT’S THE CUTEST KISS EVER I’M GIGGLING THIS IS DELIGHTFUL

Did you guys know that Kaladin is A Good?

what a good.

also, I’m worried about the parshmen. That’s not stormform--I’m assuming workform or nimbleform??--so...the storm gave them the ability to change forms again, I’m guessing? But they don’t know what to do with them. And it didn’t force them into stormform, which is why they didn’t attack, but...what does this mean?

Adolin!!! you nerd!!! he’s so excited about training her to fight!! omg “I brought the Blade guards, lemme go grab them RIGHT NOW” THIS NERD

“I can die. They will send you another to bond.” BBY NOOOOOOOO

Someone hug Pattern, please

Also hug Shallan?? maybe? girl, panic attacks SUCK I know how you feel, just breathe, babe, just breathe...

girl really needs to Deal with some shit. Get her a therapist, someone

Adolin is a good and patient boy who is genuine and wonderful, and I love him.

...whoops, I totally forgot about the Honorblade. heh

The fact that Dalinar is hiding the honorblade in the sewer pipes is delightful to me.

I miss Bridge Four.

Though this new guy from Bridge Thirteen seems chill. and funny.

except I don’t trust him? do we know him? are we sure he is who he says he is?

I’m concern

Dalinar stripping to his waist to wrestle people is hilarious to me?

OH. I didn’t realize the Thrill was an Alethi-only thing. huh. that’s still...it’s still bad, but idk if it’s worse that it’s only Alethi or better that it’s not spread to everyone.

they use terms of endearment and the term of endearment is gemheart I’m dying that’s too adorable

that was...a very interesting conversation about tradition and religion and how the two tie together. I’m particularly interested in the idea that “just because it’s tradition doesn’t mean it’s worthy; just because it’s old doesn’t mean it’s right.” I feel like there are a lot of real-world applications to that sentiment that could do with exploring...

ooohhhhhh snap OOHHHHHHH DALINAR USING STORMLIGHT THE FIRST TIME OOOOHHH

oh, Adhesion, of course. I’m genuinely curious to see what his other one does. Tension, isn’t it? How does that work hmmmmmmmmm gimme magic system answers aahh

AAAHH WHAT

EVI

WHAT

HE REMEMBERS!!!!

is it ‘cause the Stormlight “healed” his memories? Stormlight magic cancels out other magic--Nightwatcher magiOH OH MY GOD THAT’S WHY LIFT IS AGING ISN’T IT? SHE ASKED THE NIGHTWATCHER TO NOT GET OLDER BUT THE STORMLIGHT MAYBE ERASED THAT MAGIC?? MAYBE?? I FEEL LIKE THIS IS A THEORY THAT IS HIGHLY PLAUSIBLE SO I’M STICKING WITH IT.

gaahh parshendi kiddos aahh no they’re cute this is A Lot

nnnnnnnnngggggg Kaladin thinking about his escape attempts aaaaAAAAAHHHHH

“That had been his most successful escape attempt. It had lasted five days.” AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH I’m

He’s so. strong. He’s come so far. He suffered so much I just. AAAHHH

aahh, Kaladin’s first instinct when Syl is ignoring him is “oh god, I messed up something’s wrong with the bond” and that momentary panic is SO MUCH HE’S SO MUCH I’M

....parshman radiant? or?

but it’s yellow

so how is it Voidspren? unless the black sphere isn’t voidspren...

...........Odium’s champion is golden. maybe.

hm.

HHHMMM.

KALADIN IS SO GOOD

HE’S SUCH A GOOD

Mmmmmmmmmm Shallan attempting to do alcohol is. really second-hand embarrassment-y.

I’m very uncomfortable.

someone stop her

I feel like Shallan keeps rolling 2s on her Investigation checks, but then 18s on her Charisma checks to back it up. She’s the worst at this, but she’s convincing anyway.

Also, I looooove that Stormlight clears up alcohol, it’s the best.

EW SHALLAN WTF

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT

AAHH WHAT THE. GAAAHH YOU CAN HEAL YOUR HAND BUT HE CAN’T HEAL HIS UGH OH GOD WHY

okay

welp. good to know that everyone is scared of the Ghostbloods....

also maybe she shouldn’t just be spreading that association around quite so freely....

mmmm okay wth. what is the copycat murderer. some kind of illusionist, if they can pretend to be someone else so fully that even the ring impression is there....hmmmmm......

ALSO I FORGOT BUT A LIL BIT AGO, Shallan said something about not ever being able to actually fake being these people until she’d lived their lives or lived among them or smthn, and part of me is like AH GOOD SHE IS LEARNING and part of me is like “congrats on the stunning realization that darkeyes are people too” *rolls eyes*

But no, seriously, I’m glad she’s realizing these things, and at least beginning to understand that she’s coming from a place of hardcore privilege and is starting to understand what that means for her.

God, the fact that Ialai and Sadeas used to ply their political prowess and manipulation powers to get people to fight Dalinar so they could eliminate people without the use of assassins is just like....yeah, OF COURSE the betrayal in Way of Kings went down like it did. That was CLASSIC, that was something they’d probably talked about doing to other people back when they were all friends. That’s exactly the sort of scheme that Sadeas would probably have encouraged Gavilar to pull on any of the highprinces who were refusing to fall in line. And it’s just so...frustrating that Dalinar never, ever thought that those machinations could have fallen on him and his. It’s right there, right there, all along--Sadeas is the crafty one. And Dalinar trusted him anyway, and I’m. Upset.

I’m really glad that we don’t have to worry about him in the present day, but also like. We haven’t heard from Ialai at all this book. Wth is she planning.

Dalinar “Just Wandering Through a Highstorm Looking for My Lost Knife” Kholin really, really needs to chill.

“brought him to life like nothing else but battle” tbh that’s...weirdly romantic. In a creepy punk!Dalinar kind of way.

Listen, the pining for Navani here just makes the ridiculously long delays honor!Dalinar imposed on himself so ridiculous?? like? he loves her SO MUCH AND HE RESISTED SO USELESSLY FOR SO LONG

Just let yourself be happy, my dude. sigh.

THOUGH HE DID AND THEY ARE NOW AND IT’S GREAT AND I’M SO HAPPY

god, Sadeas and Ialai just...sitting on each other. is great.

UGH they loved each other a lot and they were so well-matched, and tbh I’m actually a little sad for her? that he’s dead now? idk how I feel about that.

Also, the number of times that Sadeas has said, “Oh, Dalinar,” in an exasperated and fond tone is just... bi Sadeas confirmed? idk, I don’t really want him in the bi camp. but I’m getting the feeling he belongs here.

EW DALINAR, PLEASE.

DON’T USE THE KNIFE YOU JUST STABBED SOMEONE WITH TO EAT YOUR DINNER. I DON’T CARE THAT YOU WASHED IT OFF IN YOUR WINE EEWW

“He wasn’t going to drink the wine he’d washed the blood into. He wasn’t a barbarian.” Maybe not, but he’s certainly the most Extra son of a gun I’ve ever encountered in a novel. This is wild.

Also, I’m concerned, tbh, about how his relationship with Evi is going to go down. She’s a soft, left-handed baby. Let her live.

OOOHH THE PARSHMEN ARE STARTING TO HEAR THE RHYTHMS!!! they’re real Listeners now!

Kaladin “I’m Mad that I Care About People AGAIN” Stormblessed

what a good human being

I love that every time he comes across of group of people larger than one he’s like “ah! I must teach them how to shelter and fight and protect themselves! but I don’t care about them! Of course I don’t care!! I just want them to be safe and happy and free! it’s not like I CARE about them!”

this boy is the best boy and I will fite you if you say otherwise

Adolin having “messy in just the right way” hair is DELIGHTFUL and I love that Shallan thinks it’s “cute”.

I’m genuinely disappointed to find out that women on Roshar still have periods.

That’s bullshit.

Petition for anyone with Regrowth to go around healing every woman of her cramps on a regular basis, ‘cause that’s TERRIBLE.

#otp: no mating

“When my father explained that good relationships required investment, I don’t think this is what he meant.” Who knew Adolin was good at puns!!?

Adolin cares so much about his soldiers and about soldiers in general, HE’S SO GOOD WHAT A GOOD AAHH

“You sound like your father.” “Nothing wrong with that.” A GOOD, BEAUTIFUL BOY WHO I LOVE VERY MUCH.

OHHH SHIT

WELP

THAT’S. UNEXPECTED BUT ALSO NOT???

Ialai with the Ghostbloods. That. makes a certain amount of sense in that they are both manipulators to the extreme and also EVIL. OMG THIS IS WILD

god, I adore that Rosharans call all birds chickens, it’s. so. good.

but also Mraize with a parrot: why this.

I’m sooooo worried about Adolin investigating...himself. sort of. I just. so worried.

Adolin going OFF ON Ialai HECK YE BOY GET IT

any time he talks about his mom I get emotional, though. how hard must it have been to lose her, and then to...never talk about her? because Dalinar couldn’t remember and didn’t talk about it? THE BOYS ARE SO STRONG AND I LOVE THEM

but also, like. get rekt, Ialai.

I’m. concerned. About the Ghostbloods. my dude, if you really, honestly think you can control the Voidbringers once they fully level up to Voidbringers, you’ve got another thing coming. Isn’t that the whole point of this!? They were bound to parshman form because they COULDN’T be controlled otherwise? What makes him think he and his organization are stronger and more powerful/capable than the Heralds?

Overconfident evil people are. frustrating.

I mean. I shouldn’t be surprised that Ialai is working with Amaram. and I’m. not really. surprised. but I did just hiss at the book when his name appeared.

God, I hate Amaram. Soooo much.

WHY is he here. Why isn’t he dead yet. Why haven’t we killed him yet. ARGH

mmmmmm why did three separate caravans go missing, and please tell me Kaladin isn’t going to get distracted by an investigation into that.....

(I mean, of course he is, but)

strange intelligent golden glow spren is VERY DISCONCERTING. #yikes.

This book is so dense and so intense and SO GOOD. I remember hitting this point of Words of Radiance and being like “eh, not as good as WoK” but like this one!!!! Just keeps! going!! in all these amazing ways!!! this book is so just...WOW.