#he's either always playing a crooked cop or a character who hates cops i swear there's no in between

[jtownraindancer]

May I offer you a sad boy in these trying times?

Burn Gorman as Sean Finnigan in Merseybeat, 2001.

[randommouseclick]

One Piece Modern AU

This all came about, because @gildedmuse requested cheering up from being sick, and I took up the challenge! It started simply enough and then we just kept going, making it into what it is. In the process, we accidentally wrote/talked over @bakuraryxu, who had another awesome idea (it is GOOD, and shouldn’t be ignored.)

(Link of original post, and the attached notes: 

https://gildedmuse.tumblr.com/post/620789608899330048/im-just-super-sick-so-i-am-opening-this-up-to-any )

The offered distraction that started this: “Modern Au–Zoro is that one cop that cant give his Lieutenant or Captain his location but somehow is always RIGHT THERE when needed. He also has the “bad habit” of kicking the asses of his “less upstanding” coworkers. IA both love and hate him: he weeds out the bad cops, but Dear Lord, the PAPERWORK that generates! “

And the AU we shaped from it:

ZORO: Cop. Terrible w/ directions but Johnny-on-the-Spot when shit’s going down. Has “bad habits” like kicking the asses of “less upstanding” coworkers, taking naps in the morgue, carrying around touring high school students (CHOPPER), not realizing he’s being flirted with, etc. Has a love/hate relationship w/ Internal Affairs over generated paperwork (the hate) and ousted bad cops (the love). Occasionally gets snared into ROBIN and LAW’s conversations. (Oda’s own notes say he’d be a cop, threw in PreStraw Hat (Pirate Hunter) Zoro in for good measure)

MIHAWK: Precinct Captain. Has a sixth sense (an incoming migraine) regarding ZORO and his shenanigans.

PERONA: Captain’s secretary. Loves to gossip with ROBIN and NAMI in the break room. Often has to locate ZORO and give him directions over the phone, when he gets lost...even in the building. Swears she’ll Lojack ZORO one of these days...it is unknown if she HAS.

LAW: Medical Examiner. A bit creepy, a bit hot. Tends to (whether intentionally or not) join forces with ROBIN to creep out the rest of the precinct. Is “at war” over a certain High School Student, with Crime Scene. Hits on ZORO over a cadaver, usually gets no response until MUCH later.

ROBIN: Head of Crime Scene. Often gets into conversations w/ LAW, and NAMI and PERONA. Specializes in Historical Forensics, Questionable Documents.

BEPO: Assistant Medical Examiner. Frets over LAW, ZORO and A Certain High School Student napping, paperwork needing to get done, etc. Covers napping guests w/ blankets and leaves pillows close, worries if it’s enough.

USSOP and FRANKY: Crime Scene Techs. USSOP occasionally joins ROBIN’s conversations w/ LAW, offering to search Crime Scene’s Databases for their hypothetical scenarios. At “war” w/ LAW over CHOPPER.

NAMI: Crime Scene Tech, former VICE/Undercover. Specializes in Fraud (art, financials, etc) and Questionable Documents. Usually attached to the higher end investigations as she’s able to blend in, find what she needs, and rip the rug out from under the crooks. ROBIN and PERONA are frequent gossip partners.

ACE: Cop. LUFFY’s older brother, SABO’s brother. Gets told to snap the pic of a bug and send it to LUFFY for ID and information. His phone will be buzzing for the next 4 hours, minimum.

LUFFY: Student. the Go To source for bugs and bug facts. Will send texts of information about bugs to ACE’s phone, after one question...SABO gets the Just Learned This, Ain’t It Neat?! spams. Neither have the heart to tell him to stop. ZORO lets him wear his hat and badge, as long as he remains beside him.

CHOPPER: High School Student. Will spout random, horrific postmortem facts, and frequently takes tours of the morgue and crime lab. Adored by LAW and Crime Scene. Naps w/ ZORO in the morgue during tours. Gets homemade bento lunches from ROBIN. Plans on joining the precinct when he graduates, focusing on Toxicology/DNA.

BROOK: Detective. Eccentric, good guy, C O N N E C T E D. Not shady, just a great guy--can legit get you anything: concert tickets, theater tickets, rare CDs, records, etc. Will whip out a violin and play it, at odd moments.

JIMBEI: Academy Instructor. Specializes in close combat and hand-to-hand. Hates the numbers of chokehold deaths, mourns and angered by this. Insists his students WILL be better, WILL do better--or they’re NOT going to like what happens when he finds out differently--and he WILL find out.

PENGUIN and SHACHI: Emergency Medical Techs.

SABO: Crime Journalist. Brother to LUFFY and ACE. Gets the Just Learned This, Ain’t It Neat?! spamming about bugs from LUFFY.

Other Notes:

-LAW threatening ZORO/CHOPPER if their chosen napping spot puts them underfoot, thus hindering his work, with locking them in a drawer.

-There may or may not be a ZORO-sized space between two cabinets, thus out of the way and not underfoot. No one had ever gotten the nerve to ask.

-LAW has attempted (multiple times) to seduce ZORO over a body, but ZORO just wants the info.

-A week later has bystanders watching ZORO thump his head against the steering wheel of his patrol car, when he realizes.

-ZORO waits for the next dead body to drop, so he doesn’t seem desperate--and no, naps w/ CHOPPER is not a time for flirting.

-ZORO naps in the morgue for two reasons: it’s pretty damn quiet, and it annoys LAW.

-As far as the AU is currently concerned, most of the characters in OP are either in another city or across town--that may change.

[shehzada-ali-archived]

(( ✈ ON THE ROAD AGAIN~))

((LORD THIS TOOK A WHILE BUT I’M FINALLY HAPPY W/IT))

It was amazing given the sheer number of airports they had departed and arrived upon with nearly the same frequency of New Yorkers taking the subway to their daily routine, that the little things never failed to annoyed him to close to the point of no return.

Missing bags were one thing—he could implode later on after the flight when they had disembarked from the metal tube flying at 12'000 feet in the air and he could do his best impression of Les Grossman from Tropic Thunder without attracting the attention of security, but this time, his patience was being tested even before they approached the departure gates.

“He’s with me.”Ariya stated gruffly as he picked up his hand luggage from the scanners and watched as one of the TAS officers produced two handheld metal detectors; he didn’t even have to turn around to know who among the line of weary travellers behind him had been singled out.

“At ease sir, it’s just a random check—”

“Bullshit.” He could see a few of the agents flinching at his choice of word and heard the scandalised gasps from behind him but it was 4:30am of a red eye flight and he was scrapping the bottom of his reserves of patience. “That’s what they say about him at three out of four airports we’ve been through and that’s a whole lot of airports agreeing on the same thing so if his name is the reason you keep calling his ass up, slot the patdowns a little earlier down the line so he doesn’t have to run for the fucking gates five minutes past boarding time.”|

“Sir, you’re making a scene–”

“Adeel Alam. That’s his name on the passport. That’s why you keep pulling him aside, right? You think he’s going to blow a plane or something? You know where he’s from?”His snapped back, voice rising as quickly as his pulse did.

“Ari.”

“Fucking Bolingbrook Illinois, the most mystical oasis this side of Agrabah for sure!”

“Ariya.”

“Five years on the force and the whole lot of you still insist on treating him like a goddamn criminal?!”

“ARIYA!”

The Iranian whipped his head around to the sound of his name, the way his features had been savagely twisted up in mounting rage softening immediately as he saw the concern in his co-worker’s eyes.

“It’s okay.”He heard the two words that made him want to punch a hole in the wall and his hands instinctively began flexing in a way that made two security guards from behind the conveyor belt reach for their batons.

“It is not fucking okay, Bhai. You know it’s not.”Ariya shot back even as he felt the tenseness in his shoulders dissipating when his travelling partner gripped them reassuringly. It was maddening, the weird calming effect that the Adeel, better known as Mustafa Ali in the ring had upon him when he wanted to rage, wanted to vent, wanted to sling back the mud the world had heaped upon them.

“It’s not the perfect situation, I know that, I agree; I hate the frequency of this routine where I’m concerned as much as you hate seeing me go through it but it’s 4:30am and these people are as tired as we are, same to the people behind me.”He listened as Ali reasoned with him with the same dead calm the man was well-known for.“It’s an injustice, Sher, and it needs to be fixed, but there’s a place and a time that can be better addressed. For now, let them do this.”

The fire in his belly died down a little and his nostrils flared bullishly as he looked at the stragglers behind Ali and took a deep breath before waving dismissively.

“Yeah yeah. Fine.”Came the relenting rumble as Ariya rubbed a side of his face wearily and moved aside from the line. He didn’t budge however despite the glares of consternation shot his way by the agents. “What’re you looking at? You want me to leave? ‘Cause I ain’t going nowhere until you’re done with him.”

“I-if you’d just wait here for a sec–”One of meeker ones willed themselves to speak and he wasted no time tossing his luggage down and sinking into the single seat the TSA agent had pointed out, arms crossed mutinously as he watched them escort firmly Ali to the private room and the line behind them began to move again.Every now and then he dropped his gaze upon the face of the wristwatch on his left hand before leaning back in the chair and taking his passport out from his pocket to riffle through the pages. The stamps there detailed a sprawling map all across the United States, the only home the both of them had known yet the same home that seemed determined these days to make a stranger out of the one who had traded five years of their life to keep it safe. Many a time he scoffed at Ali’s straight-laced past as a cop in Chicago, but he was the first to raise his dukes to anyone who dismissed it because of the the man’s background for sake of race, religion, a myriad of things which in a perfect world had no bearing on a man’s character. Theirs was one far from it however, and as he saw the door to the examination room crack open after fifteen minutes, he immediately rushed over to the side of the Illinois native who was visibly uncomfortable and not a word was passed between them as they gathered up their belongings and left.

“How bad?”Came Ariya’s inquiry when they were out off the TSA’s earshot and steadily making their way through the halls in search of their gate. The place was eerily desolate this early in the morning, the stores that lined the corridors dark and cafes he could swear still echoed with the laughter from its previous patrons empty.

“The pants came off. Boxers too.”Ali stated in a matter-of-factly tone though the way his sombre expression slowly lifted up in one of those ill-contained grins made the gears in Ariya’s head work at double speed and he groaned at what was coming next.

“Don’t say it. Don’t you s—”He grumbled under his breath, burying his face in his free hand for a moment as he heard the stifled snickering from his long-suffering travel mate who dropped the zinger;

“They thought I was packing.”

“I hate you.”Said Ariya with a snort as he lightly slapped the back of Ali’s head.“Arrest yourself for that double-entendre, Officer McCheesy. No fucking bail.”

“Come on Ari, at least this wasn’t like the time I played a game of hot and cold with them when they got the paddles out.”The smaller man offered with a wry grin and this time it was Ariya who let loose a bark of a laugh as he rolled his eyes at the memory.

“You were delayed for what, six hours?”He counted on the fingers of one hand, brow knotting as he attempted to recall the details. It had gotten Ali into hot water with the agents for a while but at the end of the day outside of a moment of humor it was nothing of the man’s actual fault.

“Seven. Missed my flight, rescheduled. The dinner vouchers would have made up for it if at least one restaurant in service there hadn’t been serving pork.” Said the Illinois native with a resigned shrug as they finally spotted the signs pointing out the gates.

“How the hell are you so….calm about this?”The question that had been playing at the tip of his tongue finally rolled off it as he turned to look at the former cop who raised both eyebrows quizzically.“About this goddamn system and how it’s set up to fail you from the moment it hears your name and sees your skin no matter what you do?”

“Oh don’t get me wrong about ‘calm’, how did that phrase go? 'I’m always angry’? I just happen to find arguing with congressmen during town hall meetings about pressing issues a lot more satisfying and productive. I mean, I’ve worked with the system, man; Different avenues for your righteous fury, some work better than others.”Came Ali’s reply, followed by a toothy grin which softened into something warmer that had the man dropping his gaze to the floor for several seconds. “Having travel partner willing to get his ass chewed out with me by Brisco for being delayed again though, that helps a lot with you know. Coping. Not being alone through all this.”

Ali turned his head and raised his gaze so they shared a glance and Ariya stopped in his tracks at the thought. No doubt the others they worked with sympathised with the situation, voiced their discontent every time the well-mannered optimist was pulled aside like the black sheep of a flock, but they had their own business to handle and goodbyes would be exchanged while Ali being Ali would assure them that he would be alright. A statement people like them had to tell themselves over and over again from one violation of liberty to another, all the while hoping that their angry neighbour back home or the lone white male staring holes in their back from across the street had enough self-restraint to keep their malcontent verbal. Alright as they could be, the weight of a country’s social upheaval shouldn’t have been something either of them had to bear alone.

“You’re killing my street cred here.” He complained gruffly, bumping his shoulder into Ali who reciprocated the gesture in brotherly fashion. “Don’t mention it alright. Ever.”Ali made a gesture of zipping his lips just as static began to crackle to life from somewhere above them.

“Last boarding call for Delta Airlines flight 5761, Orlando to Chicago.”The culture though somewhat mechanical voice of a woman drifted out from the speakers in the hall and the two men looked at each other once more. “Please proceed to gate 25.”

“Race you there, Ari.”Came the dare from the lithe man with a wink as he hitched his bagpack a little higher on his shoulders. “Last one to the gate pays for gas!”

Ariya watched as Ali shot off like a bullet, a crooked grin quirking up the side of his mouth as he charged along, hot at the man’s heels.

“Get ready to pay up bunny boy, 'cause I’m about to Usain Bolt your entire Terminal Dash record!”

The world wasn’t perfect and he didn’t know if Ali’s hopes for it would ever be something they could achieve in this lifetime. Didn’t mean they couldn’t find the light in the darkness from moments like these however, and for as long as he could help keep it burning, so he would.