#he's like baby I can't swim I need CPR

[softquietsteadylove]

How about them going ice skating? Gil is pretending he can’t ice skate so Thena helps him and guides him but then Thena challenges him to skate alone but with every challenge there is an award right? So he says something like if I can skate to the other side without help or falling I get a kiss. And she agrees fully believing he can’t so he surprises her how naturally he can skate. Some fluff and humor :D

you choose wich AU it should be. The Thenamesh receptionist AU or the Thenamesh Ice Queen/ Tyrant King AU :)

Gil inhaled the cool, crisp air of the outdoor rink. There were other people skating, light chatter, the scent of zamboni fluid and hot cocoa in the air. It was perfect!

Thena gasped as Gil fell forward and flat on his face. She made her way back to him in her pristine white figure skates. "Are you okay?"

"Ugh," he groaned as she helped him pick himself up (which was never going to be an easy task in any form of skate). "Fine, just tripped over a chip in the ice or something."

The Ice Queen smiled, though. Maybe it was the light snow dancing in the breeze, or maybe it was the twinkling lights everywhere. But she took his hands in hers, gloves on gloves, and started skating backwards gently. "Just hold onto me."

Gil happily followed suit, moving at her pace, careful of his movements. How could he say no to that?

And sure, he didn't really need her help--not like this, at least. But who was he to say no to his Princess?--his Queen, rather.

Gil shuffled along, not really having to fake any clumsy movements when all he was really trying to do was stay as close to Thena as possible. She had a natural grace to her, as always, guiding him around the rink with his hands in hers. "Why haven't we done this before?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well," he shrugged, smiling at the stunning woman with her blond hair floating around her and the faux-fur collar of her coat on her cheek. "You are the Ice Queen, after all."

Thena rolled her eyes. "How did you become so respected when your jokes are so terrible?"

"Couldn't tell you, Sweetheart," he chuckled, happy to let his girlfriend lead him around. "When did you learn to skate?"

"When I was young," she shrugged, still moving blithely without a care to those who may be behind her as she led Gil by the hand. Everyone made room for them, anyway, between the intimidating beauty of Thena and the sheer size of him behind her.

Gil stared at her, though, eager just to keep holding her hands and hear her talk more. "Did you do it seriously?"

"No, it was just one of the many activities I was supposed to do," Thena mused. She didn't have to explain further, and they both knew Gil already knew what she was talking about when she brought it up.

Just like Gil came from a long line of people in the business, Thena's family also was the foundation upon which her current empire was founded.

"What else did you do?" he asked, hoping to hear more as he followed her around and around.

"I suppose the things everyone at boarding school did," she sufficed before looking up at him again. "Think you can handle it?"

"Handle what?"

Thena let go of his hands, turning away from him and leaving him standing on the half line. "You seem to be doing fine. See if you can reach the far wall and back without me."

Oh, it was a challenge. She hadn't even noticed that he didn't really need her help not falling. Well, if she asked, he would tell her that he had fallen for her a long time ago, and then she would roll her eyes, and pretend she didn't think it was funny, but she'd have that cute smile on-

"Gil!"

"Hm?" he blinked, returning his attention to the woman even shorter than him than normal in their skates. He tilted his head at her, "what do I get if I do?"

"Bribery, really?" she raised a brow at him.

"Come on, Princess, number one rule of business," he chuckled, leaning closer to her, "nothing comes for free."

"Fine," she sighed, leaning away from him primly. "What do you want?"

"A kiss."

"Just a kiss?" she raised her brow at him and he nodded as if she were promising him riches beyond belief. She shook her head at him, "fine, one kiss--go."

Gil took off like a shot, able to propel himself rapidly with the muscles he had. He made it there and back in record time, skidding to a halt just beside her so he didn't get ice shavings on her.

Thena stared at him, her jaw bobbing. "Wh-"

"Sorry, baby," he chuckled, coming right up to her and rubbing her arms with his hands, "but I can skate fine. I really did trip on something when we first got here, but you were the one who started leading me around."

"But-"

"And I wasn't going to say no to holding your hands," Gil shrugged innocently, perfectly accepting of it as she slapped his arm hard enough for onlookers to seem concerned. "Now, I believe I have a reward to collect."

"You are unbelievable."

"Hey, a deal's a deal, Ice," he grinned down at her, although he soon leaned down to be in a better position for kissing. "Business is business."

Thena's lips twisted as she leaned up and in slowly, and not steadily. Her eyes darted away a few times and Gil was delighted to see a soft and pretty blush in her cheeks. His Ice Queen had a shy side to her when it came to the smallest of affections.

Gil closed his eyes, always in bliss as Thena touched her lips to his. She pulled back, satisfied with the deal. But she didn't go far, and that was all the sign Gil needed to lean in, asking for another one.

Thena let him wrap his arms around her, her hands sneaking into his open coat and onto his chest as she leaned up for him. They parted again, her needing to breathe just a little more heavily than before. Gil pressed his nose to her cheek, their eyelashes brushing each other's skin as they hovered still entangled.

Gil smiled at her, letting her pull away just enough for him to get to see those killer green eyes again.

Thena did her best to feign some disapproval, "what did I tell you about kissing in public?"

"Hey, this was my prize to collect," he smiled at her, kissing her cheek, "no conditions apply."

Thena shook her head at him again, although she clearly wasn't exasperated enough to pull away as he pressed a kiss to her cheek. "Fine; pleasure doing business."

"Oh," he winked at her, "pleasure's all mine, Ice."

"Insufferable man."

"Excuse me," he chuckled, taking her hand in his and now the one to pull her into his pace, "but you still owe me a date, Ice. So I guess you'll just have to suffer through it."

[ramsprompts]

𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑭𝑹𝑶𝑵𝑻 𝑩𝑶𝑻𝑻𝑶𝑴𝑺 . ᵛᵃʳᶤᵒᵘˢ ˡʸʳᶤᶜ ᵖʳᵒᵐᵖᵗˢˑ . PART 2.

"you are the reason i'm smiling."

"one day you will find someone who will love you the way you deserve."

"your skin's not so tough."

"i'll leave a tiny cut."

"there'll be a lot of blood."

"you are my angel."

"you are my crime."

"i'm gonna miss you when you leave."

"you're probably right."

"i don't wanna fight."

"i should think before i talk."

"i should think about my life."

"it's just so hard."

"i know how really sad you are."

"i'm probably gonna leave real soon."

"just wanted to let you know."

"you probably don't even know what that means."

"it's french."

"i know what it means."

"you don't have to be so mean."

"you probably don't understand what i mean."

"who was i kidding?"

"i can't get past you."

"better than nothing at all."

"i fell asleep in the front seat."

"i'm too tall."

"come on, baby."

"calm me down."

"i feel fucked."

"i'm gonna go get so stoned."

"there is someone else there just like me."

"i know cpr."

"i know mouth to mouth."

"i swear to god the devil made me do it."

"bad habits are the hardest ones to break."

"our love is a dangerous game."

"i cannot walk away."

"i'm full of shit."

"i just want this to mean something."

"it's gonna look like mud."

"i will help you swim."

"it's no big surprise you turned out this way."

"i begged you to stay."

"hey man, i love you ... but no fucking way."

"i'm sure we find something for you to do on stage."

"it should have felt good."

"kiss your knuckles before you punch me in the face."

"i wanna contribute to the chaos."

"i don't wanna watch."

"i am through finding blame."

"that is a decision that i have made."

"she hopes i'm cursed forever."

"sometimes i cry."

"i guess it's true what they say."

"i am emotional."

"i wish we were forever laying on the santa monica beach."

"heavenly bodies make the devil a little uncomfortable."

"there are some things i was just born to be."

"it's such a big city."

"i feel so stupid."

"i was so bored before i met you."

"i met you and everything changed."

"you should admit it."

"i probably won't."

"i'm just saying it's a bummer, man."

"i guess i'll go."

"you were my baby."

"you were too good."

"i should've known."

"you were a cross my hands could never hold."

"tell me what i need to hear."

"i asked her to sit down."

"allow me to try and explain myself."

"i can still hold a knife."

"if you ever twist my arm again, i'll be sure to put up more of a fight."

"i'm a sucker."

"i am still in love with you."

"love is simple, just like mud."

"i thought i didn't have to care about anything."

"it's funny you should ask..."

"it's freezing."

"you look so sexy."

"come on, [name], speak a little french to me."

"i was just another thing you left behind."

"i don't remember."

"one, two, three ... "

"everyone say cheese!"

"turns out it was a video."

"i have felt so lost for so long."

"this love will be never be convenient."

"it's not like a movie when we kiss."

"all i want is to want nothing."

"it just doesn't make sense."

"why can't it work out in my head?"

"let's talk about it."

"meet my pregnant girlfriend."

"watch my bank account run dry."

"it's not easy."

"hey [name] , if you still believe in the lord above .. get on your hands and knees and pray for us."

"the past few months were pretty rough."

"i've never cried like that before."

"i'm just preparing for nightmares."

"nothing feels alright now."

"crying like a baby solves nothing."

"so what, so where do i go?"

"now i am happy."

"there are answers here."

"there is nothing wrong with my lifestyle."

"breathe in. hold it , hold it . now let it out."

"it's just not who i am."

"i'm talking way too fast."

"he's looking at me."

"i wish the light would turn green."

"i'll move to florida."

"you can't touch me."

"i don't feel like singing."

"i don't really like these songs."

"i don't feel like dancing."

"let's keep it quiet."

"keep me in love, keep me believing it's with you."

"god forbid i ever stop feeling sorry for myself."

"this is not the way i plan on living for the rest of my life."

"it gets me by."

"the thought of starting over always sounds so much better."

"next thing that i know i was removing all my clothes."

"i don't regret it."

"you were the best i ever had."

[books-and-catears]

Hihihiiiii!!!!! Omg I'm so excited to ask this one-> ok so can you write/headcanon the Brothers and Undatables in a situation where MC can't swim and the brothers + undatables don't know it until one of the squad (Solomon's voodoo) picks MC up and throws them into a pool/fountain on the deep end as a joke? And MC drowns?

Bonus if anyone aside from Satan, Leviathan, and Lucifer know CPR and double bonus if Beel manages to rebibe w/o cracking a rib on MC!!

Aww heyheyhey!!! We love excitement in this house yes we do. Thank you so much for the angsty ask!

It got a bit long so I'll do it in two parts! I hope that's okay? Also I hope I can do it justice :3

It was a summer afternoon in Devildom. Diavolo had invited the whole gang upto his castle. Solomon had recently told him about pool parties and he was excited to try it out.

Everyone came in, already having the time of their lives splish splashing in the water, or going ham on Barbatos and Luke's snacks.

You were there, dipping your feet in water, enjoying the cool feeling between your toes. Everyone kept inviting you in the water, you tried to put them off by saying "Maybe later!"

You could have just said you couldn't swim. But that was too embarassing to admit, so you just shook your head and splashed water at them instead.

Mammon and Asmo were splashing water on you, so you didn't see the Little D's sneak up and hoist you up from behind. Before you knew it, you were sent flying headfirst into the water. Maybe you should have told them, you thought.

Maybe that would be better than the endless blue, the distinct lack of air and burn in your lungs as you tried hard to swim to the surface and lost all energy.

(Part 1: The Brothers)

Lucifer

"MC enough playing around. Come Bach up now." Got tensed when you didn't Immediately float up to the surface.

"MC?" He dived in to check on you. His eyes grew wide when you saw struggling, flapping your hands and feet aimlessly.

"MC HOLD ON!" The panic in his voice was muffled by the water. You felt your body being held and pulled up to the surface.

"MC? MC can you hear me?! MC!" You felt someone shaking you, their hands warm on your arms. And then your lips turned warm.

You'd recognise that kiss anywhere. It was more urgent this time, as Lucifer tried his best to get air into you.

"Luci... fer.." You choke out before coughing violently and spitting the pool water everywhere.

"You're okay..." He lets out the biggest sigh of relief. He holds you tight in his arms and takes you inside to dry you off. "I thought I lost you again..."

"Whoever is responsible for this," The suppressed rage in his voice sounded deadly, "will pay for it."

Mammon

"Oi human! Are ya sulking down there?!" Mammon joked as he dived downwards to bring you up.

"They got ya pretty good huh-" He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the state you were in. Your eyes closed and your limbs horribly limp.

"MC! MC WHAT HAPPENED?!" Mammon grabbed you and pulled you up instantly. Even in your dazed state, you could feel the pounding of his heart and the cracking of his voice.

"MC not again please not again I'm sorry I'm sorry please wake up..." He was crying now. His tears and hands were warm on your skin as pushed at your chest cluelessly.

"THEY'RE NOT WAKING UP! LUCIFER SATAN DIAVOLO SIMEON SOMEONE HELP PLEASE!" He was frantic and clamping his mouth on yours now, gasping more than blowing air.

You coughed and sputtered eventually. "Mammon... you...are exceptionally bad at CPR." Mammon hid his face in your shoulder and hugged you like there's no tomorrow.

You laugh and try to tell him you're okay but all he does is hold you and cry. "I'm the worst protector...I'm so sorry MC.."

Leviathan

"Welcome to my turf, MC!" Levi laughed as he waited for you to float back up. But you weren't. Are you stuck on something? He sees air bubbles on the surface.

He dives down and swims towards you swiftly. "MC OH NO! WAIT MC IM COMING!" He darts to towards you and gets you out the fastest.

He starts to tear up and panic cause this is just like that sad anime "Lost my Best Friend in the Deep". Embarassment be damned, he can't let you go.

He urgently called for his brothers for help and fumbled with you held tightly in his arms. He pushed on your chest and watched the water sputter out.

"MC?? You're okay now, right??! MC!!?" The urgency in Levi's voice caught you off guard. You open your eyes to see him teary eyed and sniffling.

"I'm okay Levi..." You say, your hand reaching to hold his face. He breaks down at your touch.

Pressing his face harder into your hand and crying. He's so glad you're okay. "I thought I lost my best friend...don't worry MC, I'll teach you how to swim!"

Satan

"MC, you do know how to swim right?" Satan called out to you, right after the splash. There was something about the way you fell that made him feel uneasy.

When you didn't float back up, he immediately dunked himself downwards, only to see his suspicions were right.

"MC! It's okay it's okay I've got you!" Satan's arm wrapped around you as he pressed a warm kiss on you under water. The flames in your lungs died down a little.

He rushes you upto the surface and lays down gently, tilting your head at the optimal angle.

His mouth is on you again. Urgently breathing life back into you. He also had spells ready in case this usual way didn't work.

"Satan...? You...thank you.." You said tired as you leaned into him, wrapping your arms around him weakly after vehemently coughing.

He lets out a sigh of relief and bumps his lips against your head softly, cradling you in his arms. "Why wouldn't you say that you couldn't swim? Don't do this to me ever again, MC, you're all I have..."

Asmodeus

"MC darling, no need to be embarrassed, you looked so cute when you fell like that! Come up now!" Asmo giggled as he watched the water, waiting for you to come back up.

He gets panicky when you're still not up yet. Swims down as he quickly as he can calling out your name. "OH NO! MC WHAT'S GOING ON?! MC!"

He reaches for your hands and starts tugging you towards him. Why are your eyes closed like this? Why have you gone limp?!

He pulls you up to the surface, frantically calling out to Satan and Solomon for help, all the while bouncing you in his arms like a baby as a attempt to gain conciousness.

He's full on sobbing as he Solomon gives you CPR. The moment you cough and sputter, he pounces on you, his head pressed against your cold chest, now rising and falling normally.

"Asmo... don't cry...I'm okay.." You say weakly smiling and trying to hug him back, running your hands in his hair.

He holds you close and presses kisses on your whole face."MC! You gave me such a fright! Don't do that again please, MC! I can't bear the though of you gone again!"

Beelzebub

"Ah I'm so sorry I couldn't catch you MC" Beel even had his arms outstretched so he could catch you before you fell, but he missed.

He's fastest to get to you after Levi. "MC? Are you okay down there- MC?! Why are you being like that?!" He gets frantic and scoops your limp body in his arms.

This is his worst nightmare. He urgently gets to the surface panicking inside. "MC..please wake up.." He calls out sadly, as he gently lays you down.

You're barely breathing. He knows what he has to do. But you're so fragile compared to him he doesn't want to hurt you.

He tries as gently as possible to push against your chest to regulate your breathing again.

"Beel..Beel..." You cough out his name as you reach up to hold his face in your hands. He stops immediately and engulfs you in a hug.

He doesn't say a word. He doesn't need to. His teary eyes and tight grip as he lifts you up and takes you inside the house to feed you, says everything you need to know.

Belphegor

"MC you're so easy to sneak upon hehe. Come here and lie with me." He was just snoozing at the edge, smiling down at where you just fell.

What's taking you so long to come back up?He impatiently dived downwards to find you. And he was horrified by what he saw. "MC?!Damnit MC, why didn't you call for me!?"

He hoists you into his arms and tries giving you a kiss of air like he'd seen in Levi's shows. Still unsure of what to do, he just hurries you up to the surface.

"They were struggling to swim. Something's wrong. Fix them please. Fix them fast." He said, calling out to his brothers. He held your hand shakily and lay next to you, as Beel gave you CPR. His grip tightened once you started coughing.

"Belphie... I'm okay..." You squeezed his hand as tight as you could. He hid head in your shoulder before picking you up in his arms.

He wrapped you up in a towel and tried to make you fall asleep in his arms. "That was a horrible feeling. I don't want to feel that again." He mutters to himself while holding you closer.

[bravo-four-seal-team]

Sawyer Siblings: Look away for a second.

@theysayitscrazy  @rebelwrites @disasterfandoms @galaxysanduniversesinmymind @milfdeacon @jayhalsteadfan-2417 @thelovelyleo23 @pinkrockstar19 @softi92 @innerpaperexpertcloud @hails-halstead @jomariekirby @mrsmarvelous1995 @jasonbabymama ​ @supervalcsi

WARNING THERE IS MENTIONS OF DROWNING

"Come on!" Metal grinned "It's just swimming, how can you hate swimming? You're a Marine baby" he says, wrapping his arms around Ashley, Letting her lean back against his chest. 

"I uh, just I swim if necessary baby" Ashley mumbled. 

"Both Sawyers hate the water really?" 

"Trent doesn't like it, I hate it and the beach" Ashley whispered, turning in his hold and wrapping her arms around him, hiding into him, he didn't miss the tears. 

"Ash What's wrong?"  he asked, looking over to where Amelia was standing with Trent, he said something to Amelia, walking over and gently pulling Ashley away and up to the car park at the beach. 

2006 - June

"Come on T!" Ashley smiles at her big brother running down to the beach. She loved coming here with her brother, especially when he was back from deployments, but he’s still recovering from his injury, so they’ve been coming out here every weekend. 

"Hold on Ash, let me set up here and then we'll go and swim" Trent chuckled, putting towels down and grabbing sun cream, moving to Ashley and putting it on her, listening to his sister complain "Yeah well last time you burnt up so, we are being safe." He chuckled. 

Eventually Trent was giving Tips to Ash about swimming, survival, also both messing around and having fun. Then the worst happened, a wave came crashing down on Ashley, sucking her under, pulling her away from Trent, she tried calling out but the salt water hitting her caused her to choke, each time she broke the surface she was further away.

Trent had his eyes off her for two seconds "Ash? ASHLEY?!" he shouts, then he sees her, he knows it's a race against the clock,  he's swimming, fighting against the waves to get to his sister.

Then it happened, he lost her, he can't find her, the Ocean has pulled her under. 

In the space of five minutes the fun trip went to hell. 

He's diving under, it's dark but he grabs his sister, swimming back to the surface, breaking through the top of the water, gasping for air, getting them both back to shore.

He placed her on the sand, going through his checklist. 

Beginning CPR and rescue breaths, muttering as he counted, “Hey! Do you need help!” someone shouted, running down. 

“Call an ambulance!” Trent shouted, seeing the stranger nod, finally his sister began to cough up water, the nightmare was over. 

He pulled his sister to his chest, kissing the top of her head, the stranger helping him wrap her in a towel and one around Trent. 

They watched as the young girl clung to her brother, shaking and crying as the sirens could be heard approaching. 

“I got you kid” Trent mumbled.

“I got you” Trent said, helping Ashley sit on the grass, looking at her “take a few breaths,” he whispered, sitting beside her. 

“He’s gonna think I'm a nutter now” Ashley whispered, leaning against her brother.

“You mean you haven’t told him why you don’t come to these places?” Trent sighs, shaking his head “Lucky for you, I told Amelia so he’ll know now” he says, watching Amelia talk to Metal. Seeing the concerned looks being thrown at them. 

Ashley sighed, Carter siblings walking up and sitting with them, Trent wrapped an arm around Amelia “You ok?” he asked, seeing the woman nod. 

“How about we go somewhere else?” Metal suggests, pulling Ashley to him and hugging her “We can go get a milkshake” he suggests. 

Ashley nodded, getting up the others standing, she quickly tugged at her brother's arm getting him to stop, he sighed, pulling Ashley into a hug “You’re ok kid, it’s alright.”

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Jeremiah: how'd you know that was your granny?

Me; i remember her voice. Jeremiah don't cry

Jeremiah: that's so fucked up how do you say that to someone?

Well... I remember her voice and im sure God made sure that memory was open for me. She got a real rugged voice like her life, I knew it when she said I had to apologize. Its a voice that carries all this pain from all these years. Remember she was real old and wrinkled like crispy crispy fried chicken. And her little old eyes... They were always sad and mad and all mean no nonsense and she couldn't ever hear and i hated yelling at her so she could hear so she had me write it down for her.

But her voice is like her face when she was alive, deep from the heart carrying what the heart feels, that's how. Just carrying all her life dignity and harsh life experiences.

So a little story about my mom and my granny. Denise used to live with my granny in one of them silver bullet type campers but it was real spacious. She used to live there with granny to keep her ass from jail. Granny was the only one that could ring her up by her neck like a chicken and beat that ass.

One time we went to visit in about 1985 and Denise went in there and stabbed her with an ink pen right in the foot. I remember that iodine they used to clean and heal it up with all on her skin. And the bandages.

Denise did it right in front of me cause i went out there and Denise was taking off ber top all "my granny gonna give me a bath" and my granny looked scared.

Mind you id already drank bleach watched my twin brother murdered in front of me abd bypassed death multiple times So i knew by looking in grannys blue eyes she wasn't about to give no one a bath.

So i looked all in the small trailer and told her "there aint no place to take a bath. There aint no tub. What in the sink? You're way too fat to"

"Well fine I'll wash the dishes" took a pan and knocked my granny out cold! I ran to get my dad and I felt i didn't run fast enough by the time i got back my mom was all trying sex shit on my granny who was knocked out. So i went outside and screamed on the top of ny lungs and everyone came running then.

They dumped granny in an old wash tub in the yard. Old silver one y'all rich people use to feed your calves and horses in. And woke her up and i was all satisfied cause I got to wondering "where does she bathe?" Well in the big house of course but they only had a shower there. So i was all "now that's a bath" the rest of the summer i used it for my bathing tub and my swimming pool and we made a mud pit to wrestle my cousin in. Girls against girls and boys against boys my granny said. Till i won all the girls at least twice then she said i could wrestle the boys. With my clothes on of course. Kyle was the only one that could beat me of my cousins. Now he is gangsta thug through and through. Big as Hell and i know I'd be a dumb bitch to start with him but he ain't nothing but a big ole teddy bear to most. Still would not cross him a bit. I beat a few of my uncles, too. But to be fair i was pretty wiggly and we were in some real wet slick mud from my tub overflow and swimming with the girl cousins and the boys splashing during their turn. And a bit of sprinkle instigation from my granny spraying us down to call quits and to hose those beat down so they could go play safe.

So that night i was hiding in my moms old bed with granny in her little house and my uncle all dumb came with my mom, not knowing what was to happen. Well my mom told little old Shane to beat it and my mom was all trying her Sins again and she kept wiggling at the curtain and all so I crept up to the corner and peeked around and Denise said "why is she in here?"

Granny said "well you didn't even know she was missing"

And so Denise punched her right in the eye! So i jumped up and knocked down the blue and green and yellow paisley curtain to separate the bed space, thankfully I jumped and it didn't heat me full on the head and i started screaming full on hoping my uncle was close enough to hear.

He was But he ran in the big house to get my dad and his dad and anyone else.

I was standing on the curtain when Denise stabbed my granny with the blue note pen we were using to talk with. And stabbed my granny right in the ankle space above her foot and under the calf.

Then she came for me so i ducked in that small 5 feet of space that the kitchen covered, yanked that pen out my granny and went towards my mom and she ran for the door, the fat coward. So I stabbed her right in the left shoulder blade like a boss bitch. I was 4 years old.

"Well you little" she spat as she turned with eyes only the Devil himself would be fond of. I was fucking exhausted fighting all day and being in the mud and all and i had been sleeping so i got pissed. I wouldn't done that shit she stayed in the big house like she was supposed to.

So i took that pan granny put in the drawer, a good 9 inch iron skillet only God could made and I started beating the shit outta her. Right on the left side of the face first then she fell all fake and i kept beating her then she started biting my granny!!! Right about then the door flew open and my little uncle that had just been out was there and he said "they're coming" i saw relief on my granny i was all "no i got this, shut the door I don't need the whole house seeing this"

But i seen a pair of old man grandpa hands that been working the prison for 40 years reach in and grab those fat ankles and pull her out and im yelling and beating her the whole time. "Hey! What the Hell are you doing?! I ain't finished! Shit and Fuck! Get back here you dumb bitch ---"

And i looked up in the dark and saw nothing but my grandpa's bright blue eyes twinkling in the low kitchen light "Well finish"

"I... Uh.. Let me get the pan!" I was plum confused "are you sure? I can for sure kill her"

"As you wish" and he gestured toward my mother's body. She was wrestling to wake up and grandpa put his bare foot brave to walk in the desert valley of Arizona square on her back and i told him hold on to the door so he didnt fall and i went wailing on her till my dad came and i looked at my dad with that iron pan in both my hands held low at my hips "but I'm not finished"

Oh grandpa just started laughing so hard he could barely stand i was glad he held that door cause for sure he would fallen. And grandpa said "ah just let her"

"Alright!!!" I started to begin wailing again "oh can i dad?" I was a perfect child, always getting permission from adults to murder. Still do. Still do. Except for here and there in My teenage years. "Oh and someone got to take care of her!" Cause my dad and grandpa were wondering if i was finished cause i was covered in blood. And granny was yelling "no its me! Let her finish!"

So my dad went in and left to get some bandages from the house. Cause she was squirting blood all over. And dripping and her tea towel (hand towel) was soaked nearly full of blood except the corners.

Granny hollering "I'll be fine! Let her finish!"

Y'all see me in this old lady? Genetics baby, i got the good ones.

So i started wailing harder than ever on that old beast. Im only four and that iron skillet was heavy and i been done using my muscles for the day already. But i got fueled for seeing that blood and i kept on the back of her neck till grandpa said "woah what's that pen doing out her back? Did you do your granny too?"

My mouth dropped open "no sir"

"Alright then finish" just like a prison guard he told me.

"Well yes sir where shall i hit?" My granny had been teaching me old fancy words and styles of speaking from "the old South" all day. Kinda testing me. She would say a sentence like "shall I order some tea?" And I had to guess what she asked "oh can you" and I would write "can" and she would say what kinda can? She would show me green bean can and i would shake my head no.

"Well you can hit her in the legs so she can't walk and do this no more"

So i hit her square on her lower ass "the top of the legs! The middle! The ankle, the calve!" I went up and down shouting anatomy I looked up at my granny and she looked tired with her head down so i yelled "oh fuck! Is she alright?!? Dad is my granny--?" And she waved her hand at me my dad was looking up at me, his eyes full of pain, sadness and glistening with humor and admiration. My mouth fell over "are you" and i stumbled towards him and granny waved me off again and i seen she was laughing and she sat up heehawwing all kinds! Then put her head down. Grandpa was shaking the whole door with his laughing nearly shaking it plumb off i was afraid. "Now what were you doing when i was shouting anatomy? Your face was different" i hit that ink pen in further about all i could muscle up seeing everyone was alright.

"Anatomy? Billy where she learned this shit from? I know shall and sir was from her but anatomy?! What? Go on you can hit again"

"Oh Idk i guess Denise"

"Yeah that bitch be hitting me if i don't help her study right. Don't you?" I grabbed her by the back of her bloody head and looked in her face and dropped both her and the pan "oh my God, that's gross. She about to stink"

She was dead.

"Now we gotta do CPR" said my tired dad

"Now you hold on! Now this is MY house! Sabrina you do the CPR" i helped him flip the bitch over "now Billy you stay right there. Sabrina now you jump on her chest! Get to starting!"

"But i don't wanna!!!!"

"Now come on I'll help you. Well hold hands, you know how to take a life dont you? Now you gotta earn your path and make sure you know how to restart one too! Now come on! Don't run!"

Dam I tried not to learn that lesson and dam if it hadn't stuck with me all these years. 4 year old kid me learned some real stuff back then in 1985 but here in 2019 i learned the rest of my path. Sometimes it's alright to let me finish and run off. Now me and Jesse are in a fight because he disagreed with me, i got real mad and some new friends questioned my judgement. But they understood after a nap. And i still ain't friends with Jesse now. Cause it ain't about death with him its the fact he still wants kr to suffer. So I'm glad my granny is back Because she aint that way. My grandpa is here, too And he sure is sorry. He died of cancer. My Granny just cause she was old lonely and had a broken heart. And Jesse better watch the fuck out cause hes the liar, not me. He got me mad. Done sent two people to kill me in Santa Fe and some bitch tonight all talking about hiding on my porch with a gun. I told his bitch ass he better be in a bullet proof vest cause ima shoot his face with it. He got scared m i told him he better start running and jesse was all she's too fat to chase you!! For real. My legs work. Today in 2019.

So now i listened cause my dad yelled but my granny said "let her run!"

But I listened cause my dad always protected me so if it was me I'd want CPR probably

And we had a discussion about it. And grandpa said "you want me and your dad to do it or you want me and you?!"

"Me and you, i guess. If someone's gotta do it better be Me, sir i got it" i grudgingly climbed on my moms fat where my grandpa gave me a tight hug and made my sadness disappate.

I tried to run again "now come here!"

"Awh! I thought I'd get a hug and that would be the end!"

"Is that what your mother do to you?"

I started all crying trying to explain.

"Never Mind ill call the ambulance"

My dad did and my dad said not to jump and put my feet where they should go and i just moved up and down real soft a bit once the ambulance lights turned the corner.

Grandpa said to take granny first although she was hurt a bit and said Denise was going to through coroner and the EMT argued "we are here to save a life"

"Then save her!" He pointed at me, "SHE did this Cause her momma, this one" he pointed at the ground "has been attacking dear old granny all day! Now call the coroner! I would say im sorry! But im not! Now call it up use the phone! Go on and do it!"

"Sir let me remind you you're not the sheriff!"

"then call him!!"

"Im glad I'm not in prison because now I can see why you work there youre scaryyyy"

"Did he make you do it?!?!"

"He stabbed my granny with a pen? No she did!!!!"

Granpa was all "whoa! Now she knows consequences of actions and you're standing here arguing and i got one bleeding to death, a little one all nervous and a dead body! Are you here to save a life or what not?!?!"

"Yes sir. Let me get in there to old granny but move her" finally he looked down "oh she's dead. Im sorry sir"

"Well i ain't!" My grandpa was loud granny laughed.

"Y'all are about as sick in the head as i ever seen" the EMT tried not to laugh

"Well you see a grown woman trying to rape your granny! That was her mom and she got her and i sure aint sorry it's about the 5th time today I had to get onto her about behaving!" Then grandpa's voice got quiet and gentler "now this one!" And he picked me up and carried me "now im going over to the tractor!!" And he put me up high on it and told me he was hiding me and I could run if i wanted, no one would ever catch me.

I didn't. And i was told to tell only what Denise had done to my granny. And i had won at muscle wrestling all day in the mud and i was in there sleep to protect my granny And i did. To the fullest extent of the law.

Unfortunately they sent the fat old bitch to the hospital and got her dumb ass back to life. Unfortunately I didn't beat it into her brains well enough... Cause now 34 years later.... Denise hasn't changed.

We should just put her in the field and ran her over with the tractor for the horses to eat and the dogs.

Its made me wiser to the world around me. Smarter than i can stand, until i want death myself because there's no end to misery.

But I've learned that i can't kill them all. So days that I get the good old dead back relieve a misery that i cannot stand that I see in so many people.

And those life lessons I learned all those years ago at the tender age of four have always stuck with me and have changed the world m from Iraq to Afghanistan to the good old USA. And they will continue to. And even in London.

And that's my promise given to me by the dead that they intend to keep.

So lately I've been thinking about Revelations in the bible. It keeps me happy to think one day (hopefully soon) all the evil will drop dead and all the good ghosts can once again have bodies they can keep. That keeps me healthy and "mentally sane" as they call it.