#his junior's cheesecake hat :)

[philhoffman]

[pines-troz]

Pinky and Brain Character Info from the Cinderella AU

- Pinky grew up with his mom, dad, and little sister (who’s a mouse in this AU and not an empty thread spool). His parents showered their kids with love and affection. When Pinky was five, he received Pharfignewton as a birthday present, and it was love at first sight. Pinky learned about responsibility through Pharfignewton: taking the time to feed her, take her out on walks, cleaning her stable, and brushing her mane. When he was older, his parents got another pet for him and his sister, an orange puppy they named Buttons. 

- When Pinky was twelve, his mother and sister perished in a terrible carriage accident. This devastated Pinky and his father. While Pinky turned to Pharfignewton and Buttons for comfort, his father was acquainted with a noble widow named Nora Rita Norita. He learned that Norita has two daughters, Katie and Elmyra, both of whom are younger than Pinky. So he decided to remarry to fill the void left in their family. They were married for two year until he fell ill and passed on. During that time, Pinky didn’t know what to make of his stepmother and stepsisters. He felt uncomfortable whenever Nortia talked to him. Pinky quickly knew to never cross Katie, who turned into a monster when she didn’t get her way. But Pinky was most terrified by Elmyra, who would try to play various ‘games’ which were more or less designed to physically assault him. Pinky never brought up how he felt to his dad because he sees how happy he is with their new family members and Pinky doesn’t want to hurt his feelings. 

- After his father’s passing, PInky was immediately reduced to a servant and Norita spent the majority of the shared family fortune on her two daughters. But Pinky’s optimism remained as strong as titanium as he found a lot of coping mechanisms to help him get through each day. 

- Tending to the animals is his absolute favorite thing to do. He still has ownership of Pharfignewton and Buttons, but overtime he gained more animal friends. He befriends a trio of birds named Bobby, Squit and Pesto, and feeds him his leftovers and makes clothes for them. They return the favor by becoming his alarm clock. Pinky especially loves to tease Pesto. One day, he finds a stray cat and dog in the stable and is filled with compassion. He brings them food and water, and they decide to stick around. Pinky names the cat Rita and the dog Runt. When he realizes Elmyra’s tendency to hurt the animals, Pinky insists that she plays with him instead, to save them the trouble. 

- Pinky also loves to sing while he does his chores. He often sings about things that he loves, like the different kinds of cheeses, Pharfignewton and the other animals, and the romantic stories he reads. But his favorite song to sing when he’s feeling down is “Just Say Narf”. Pinky sometimes plays the violin during his free time, which he calls ‘the flute’ and holds little concerts for the animals. 

- Pinky also loves to makes clothes. He often makes clothes for the animals, like hats, vests, shirts, scarves, sweaters, pajamas, shoes. The Goodfeathers love sporting their outfits Pinky makes for them, and even brags about their clothes to the other birds. When they bring along the Godpigeon, Pinky makes a specialized suit just for him. Even though Rita isn’t a fan of wearing clothes, she appreciates the sentiment. 

- Pinky also loves to bake desserts. He even manages to create a no-bake cheesecake that he shares with the animals. 

- Pinky’s dreams are what motivates him to get up in the morning. He often has lovely dreams about living in a nice house with knick-knacks, where he can makes clothes, bake, care for the animals, and be surrounded by loved ones. His desires are mostly stemmed from wanting to return to the happier days of his youth spent with his mom, dad, and sis. But he is determined to one day find a family of his own. 

- Brain had a sheltered early childhood. He mostly spent his time in the castle’s library reading a lot of books on various subjects such as science, math, history, art, and literature. When he was nine, Plotz brought Brain along for an important conference in another part of the country. During the trip, he witnessed many people living in poverty on the streets from inside his carriage, things that he read about in his books but finally realized. When they went to the conference, Brain brings this up to some of the politicians, and they brush him off. Brain then vowed that if he was the one in control of things, then he would eradicate many issues that plagued society. After returning home, Brain is determined to seize control of the world so he could fix it. 

- Although Brain had a relatively happy childhood, he began to feel pressured by Plotz, during his teen years. His father nags Brain to get a girlfriend so he could get married and have children together (fueled by his desire to have grandchildren). Dating is nowhere near the top of Brain’s priorities. 

- Plotz tried to set him up two times before the royal ball. Once was before Brain left to study at a prestigious university in another country. One of Plotz’s aristocratic friends has a daughter named Billie, and he sets the two of them up on a date. Even though Brain was at first smitten by her beauty, the date proved to be disastrous as Brain’s awkward attempts at small talk backfired on him and Billie stating that she doesn’t have any romantic feelings for him. The second time was during the first summer break when Plotz paired Brain with another noblewoman named Julia. While the two have more in common, Brain didn’t have any romantic feelings for her. He was thankful when Julia gently let him down. When Brain bumped into Julia a year later, he learned that she was dating Billie. 

- Brain thrived academically during his four years studying at the foreign university. He even became involved in a lot of extracurriculars, such as choir, the debate team, the engineering club, the mathletes, and the school’s rhythmic gymnastics team. Brian eventually became the captain of the rhythmic gymnastics team in his junior year, and even carries around a painted portrait of him in a blue spandex suit twirling around a lavender satin ribbon to show off to people as a conversation starter. 

- During this time, he also formed a close friendship with Snowball, and loved to make him laugh. But the two had a falling out in their senior year, when Snowball became jealous of Brain’s academic standing and mocked his dreams of taking over the world. 

- The only two people Brain has in his support group are the two Grand Dukes, Yakko and Wakko Warner. While their presence in the castle was mainly to consult with Plotz, they spend a lot of their time hanging out with Brain, telling him jokes and making him laugh. Brain appreciates their company.

- During his sophomore year at the university, Brain realized that he was attracted to men as well as women. When Brain decides to come out as bisexual, Yakko and Wakko are the first people to know, and they are overjoyed. When Brain decides to tell Plotz, he’s surprised to learn that Plotz was ambivalent over this, but still insists that Brain gets married.  

- Whenever Brain brings up his desire to take over he world, nobody really takes him seriously. Plotz thinks that he’s joking, and even Yakko and Wakko see his nightly plans as a hobby of his. The first person he comes across who is actually supportive of his ambitions is Pinky. 

[chronicalanxiety]

[here are their cutie marks and a sketch of their human forms that nobody asked for]

Now here’s a huge ass description for the kids™ if anyone is interested

Zap Apple

Rainbow and Applejack's first-born child and Lil' Cheese's best mate. Zap is a daydreamer and has a gentle soul, he's that one ripped nerd that likes writing and drawing things just for the sake of it. Exploring and discovering new things and places is what really makes his eyes glow (history and geography hoe), so he can be usually seen carrying his saddlebag around all the time (you never know when you're gonna need sketching and exploring supplies). Zap also loves puzzles and is a huge fanboy of Daring Do Books like Dash (and adventure books in general. AJ swears it's because Rainbow used to read so many Daring Doo adventures to her belly when she was pregnant). While he can be smart, he tends to over-thinks things, Zap has a wide imagination and is easily one of the most compassionate ponies around, though he used to be easily coaxed into fights or manipulated by his feelings. Like a good apple family member, the boy loves farm life and has a strong fraternal instinct, but his nature just doesn't allow him to settle there, though he still finds some peace whenever he's back in the environment he grew up in.

Random facts:

- Zap loved wearing his Ma's hat so much that she gave one for him as a gift in a Hearts Warming;

- He lost part of his his right ear to a bad fall when he and some friends went exploring one of his first off-limits area;

- Loves collecting comic books and stamps;

- AJ entered labor right during a Zap Apple harvest (Yep, that's exactly how he got his name);

- Inherited AJ's stare and lie detector;

- Upon noticing Zap's resemblance to his great grandmother, Rainbow nicknamed him Baby Smith.

Applejoy

Rainbow and Applejack's middle child. Applejoy doesn't take her name for granted, she's a total sunshine and bringing people happiness is what really makes her happy. She tends to be famous for getting a bunch of bruises all the time and being a little too reckless, so much so she lost two of her teeth out of pure clumsiness when she was little and had to wait until they began to grow to get them back (still has the best smile), and she also used to break her flying goggles at least once a week. The girl is also very outspoken and sincere, though it can end up being a problem sometimes. Applejoy is the family's Poly Athlete and has strong and fast wings (as well as legs, the girl is speed itself), she doesn't do very well in school but makes for it in sports and is very disciplined when it comes to it (Rainbow is her personal coach for every occasion). She hates losing, but tries her best to be a good sport and not to show she's upset most of the time. It was also awfully difficult for Applejack to handle her being all over the place when she learned how to use her wings (no need to say she was very grateful when her next child was born an earth pony).

Random facts: - Inherited Rainbow's habit of napping on trees (Applejack didn't like the idea, she was always concerned her children were gonna fall and hurt themselves for being too cloud-headed);

- Loves to indulge in her mother's sugary treats;- Rainbow started calling her junior (or AJJ) because her name abbreviation is the same as her ma's. No need to say the nickname was a success;

- Sleepwalker;

- The bandana she uses around her neck is a part of the fabric of an old sheet she used to nap with;

- Likes a bunch of crafts, specially wood-carving, but isn't really gifted at most of them (doesn't matter because she always tries her best every time).

Cider Splash

Rainbow and Applejack's youngest child and Tank's best buddy. Cider Splash a performer at heart, he's a innate dancer and plays multiple instruments very decently, he's the loudest of the bunch in every way and talks everyone's ears off (some conversations can also turn into musical numbers for no apparent reason). He's the most headstrong and stubborn out of the three, so he'll almost always get really deep into a project (or anything, really) when he sets his mind in it. He has blessed hoofs like AJ and is by far the one who ends up helping with the applebucking stuff the most, though he has a natural charm with the farm animals and prefers playing with them (his love for animal plushies wasn't taken for granted). He also indulges in cooking (mostly by Big Sugar's influence). Cider was always jealous of his sibling's ability to fly, so RD tries to compensate by taking him for a ride every once in a while and making sure he's the first one to get Wonderbolts tickets whenever they perform.

Random facts: - His love for music started when Applejack bought him a toy guitar to get him out of his tantrums when he was little. Later, his grandpa Bow Hothoof gave him a mini drum set as a birthday gift. AJ and RD weren't very happy when he started playing it all the time and making a bunch of noise, but they eventually saw potential in it and started investing in his inate talent;

- No need to say cider is his favorite drink ever;

- His bandana was a handmade gift from his Aunt Applebloom.

Florence

Fluttershy's big baby and Agate's older step-sister. Florence is a very resourceful and hard-working young mare, though she tends to spends way too much energy worrying about results and is almost constantly on the verge of outright panic (she's usually seen gritting her teeth or generally flipping out, no need to say she does not fare well under stress, specially when she is given a task to complete). Florence is known to be very sensible and intelligent, and even though she sometimes puts her own paranoia before common sense, she usually manages to find logical solutions to problems. She learned how to deal with stress by canalizing it into something productive, thanks to Rarimom (which ended up being another source of anxiety, ironically). She also has very strong beliefs, and when forced to question them, she becomes very upset. Despite that, Florence is extremely loyal and kind and will go out of her way to help other ponies.

Random facts: - Her scarf was given by Rarity, it made her feel safe when she was little, and she still uses it until this day (Her moms had to bribe with her in order to get her to let them clean and wash it after months of using it non-stop);

- Probably has OCD;

- She has also been known to retreat into her imagination when under extreme stress, often picturing peaceful, grassy fields or tranquil landscapes to calm herself down.

- Florence loves her coffee, tea and Fluttermum's pets more than her life (She loved growing up around pets, they still give her a sense of calm and relaxation. Her mom used to use them to calm her down when she was crying or couldn't sleep, she would almost always fall asleep after caressing some pet's ear for a while)

Agate

Rarity’s most precious gem and Florence’s little step-sister. Agate has been a very independent gal since she was little, she has been described as curious, monotone and sarcastic, and also appears to be more logical and mature than some of her peers, typically being the one to call them out on their ignorance, she’s inclined to remain passive and stoical to most things that happen around her. She has a fuckton control over her emotions and wears a neutral expression about 80% of the time, but is actually a pretty chill gal and has a very good (and weird) sense of humor. Agate has a great eye for photography (specially Avant-garde stuff) and turns out working as a professional photographer in the future.

Random facts: - Lowkey a huge mystery fan and computer nerd;

- Has a huge soft spot for Fluttermom's pets since she first came in contact with one, she can’t help but to smile the whole time she’s around them;

- Discord's favorite gal right next to Fluttershy.

Lil' Cheese

So let's get this out of the way, the script says Lil' Cheese is a colt, but many people see them as a filly, so they ended up being non-binary in my headcanon because I couldn't decide their gender (but go with whatever suits you better).

"Don't worry, Zap and Cheese got another infallible plan". Cheesecake, AKA "Lil' Cheese", is first and foremost known for the ability to talk their ass off anytime of the day for whatever reason (they used to spend most of their time besides their mom, so no need to mention that they practically picked up all her goofiness and energy by osmosis), they're also an excellent actor and are known as "The God of Puns". They’re generally a popular and gifted student, however, they're foul-mouthed and kind of competitive (but despite that, they are generally well liked and always looking after their friends). Lil' Cheese uses their innate talent for comedy and natural charm and charisma to help attract attention to their mum's bakery. Cheese had pretty deep random conversations with Pinkie since very little, so they turned out to be a pretty good conversationalist and improviser.

Big Sugar/Little Mac

I don't really have a very elaborate description for him (sorry peeps), but I imagine Sugar as a very sweet (pun intended) Big Baker Boy that loves cooking (and eating, most of all). He has that big bro energy and always gives the best hugs, but can also have with no mercy when messing around with his peers. He's very well liked around Ponyville and known for his extroverted and warm nature, though he may care way to much about other's opinions and tends to take a lot of them personally. Being a proud member of the Apple Family, he's the embodiment hard-work and loves working on the farm, but his heart always feel in the right place whenever he's preparing meals for other ponies.

----------

Okay, so quick backstory time about how Flarity happened in this canon.

Fluttershy was going through a very rough time with her previous marefriend, she always wanted to have a child of her own, and seeing her friends having some of their own made her even more eager to have one, so she found a sperm donor and conceived Florence with the consent of her partner at the time. Their relationship didn't get any less toxic even after Florence was born, so as a good friend, Discord felt the obligation to intervene (along with the rest of the elements of harmony) and convince Fluttershy to just end it and let go, as it wasn't doing any good for both her and the kid. When she finally got out of it, Discord and Rarity were the ones who helped Flutters to heal the most.

Meanwhile, Agate was the product of Rarity's previous marriage with Fancy Pants and was conceived as the last hope for their doomed marriage. Turns out having a child didn't save their relationship and they ended up divorcing, both going their separate ways with their own lives and businesses, however, it was a healthy separation and they remained in good terms with each other. Rarity took this separation as a way to get to know more about herself and to spend more time bonding with her daughter, having a break from her business life and letting Sassy Saddles and some other employees take the wheel for a little while, though she didn't stop playing her part on the creative side. During the time Fluttershy was going through her healing process, she and Rarity reconnected and some gay stuff happened. By the time the series ended they were probably on the dating phase and close to engagement. They eventually marry and join their families together.

Also Discord's still a very close friend of the couple and helps them and the kids whenever and in whatever way he's able to. He loves spending time with the kids, specially Agate, who finds his chaotic energy specially amusing.

[nothingunrealistic]

59, tayston

59. “Is this okay?”

“If the mega-wide toilet paper roll is sixty-five inches long,” Winston says, speaking under the steady voice of the How It’s Made narrator, “and it’s cut into sixteen four-inch rolls, what happens to the extra inch?”

“Kerf loss.” Still focused on the screen, Taylor turns down the TV’s volume. “That saw blade’s easily a sixteenth of an inch wide. Sixteen rolls, sixteen cuts, and the extra inch is dust on the factory floor.”

Winston rolls that over in his mind. “Fifteen cuts. It’s a fencepost problem.”

“That’s true.” Taylor looks at him, deliberate, then smiles. They’d been absorbed in the show when Winston arrived, and he was content to watch with them, but contentment is nothing beside the delight of having Taylor’s pleased attention on him. “Good catch.”

They kiss him lightly. He kisses back, deeper. One of Taylor’s hands curls around Winston’s shoulder, tugging him closer; judging by the clattering on the coffee table, and the sudden background silence, the other’s busy with the remote.

Winston twists toward Taylor, setting a hand on their knee to balance himself as they keep kissing. Their back is against the sofa still, only turning their neck to reach him. He slides his hand up their thigh, and their fingers abruptly close around his. “Wait.”

“What’s up?”

Taylor bites at their lip briefly before answering, “I don’t want to go any further than this. Tonight.”

“Oh,” Winston says. Shit, shit, what was he thinking? “Sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed —”

“It’s fine. You didn’t overstep.” They kiss him one more time, feather-light. “I’m just tired.”

“Should I head out?”

“No, I… I’d like you to stay, if you don’t object.” Taylor’s changed their grip on his hand when he wasn’t looking; their fingers are interlaced with his now. “Just to lie down, maybe.”

“Sure.” Winston looks at the couch under them both, a utilitarian thing straight out of Billionaire’s IKEA. “Here?”

“My room, I think.”

They cross the kitchen and climb the stairs hand in hand. When they get to Taylor’s bedroom, though, Taylor lets go of his hand and almost immediately falls down on the comforter with the vigor they usually reserve for when they’re pulling him along; they lie still for a few moments before noticing Winston still lingering in the doorway. “You’re allowed to come in, you know.”

“I know.” Does he sound defensive? “Actually, I’m a vampire.” He clambers onto the bed and settles next to Taylor, lying on his side. “You gotta invite me in.”

Taylor smiles and wraps an arm around his shoulders. “I hope you get permission before biting, too.”

“Always.” Winston shifts to lay his head on their chest and hugs them around the waist, one-armed. They’ve done this before, but only ever after sex rather than in its stead. It’s strange this way, but quiet and sweet and warm. (Literally, on that last, seeing as they’re both fully clothed.)

Some minutes pass in stillness. Taylor starts running their fingers through his hair, gentle yet steady. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah.” It’s “okay” like a Junior’s cheesecake is “okay,” so damn good that calling it “okay” amounts to slander. Winston almost wants to tell them that he’d do this for them too, but they don’t have hair. Well, they do, but it’s always so short, and Winston stroking their bare head wouldn’t be soothing. Or maybe it is, he’s never asked. And if his hands are cold, which they usually are, it’d be even worse. Like that Ice Bucket Challenge thing. He hasn’t thought about that in years.

He’s probably going to fall asleep here, and soon.

“Does your head ever get cold?”

Taylor pauses in stroking his hair. “Hmm?” He doubts they’re dialed all the way in either.

“Does your head ever get cold?” Winston repeats. “You know. No hair. New York City. Going outside. Michelin star recipe for frostbitten ears.”

A soft laugh, barely more than an exhale. “Are you familiar with the concept of hats?” Taylor says, light and fond. “They’re very common.”

“I’ve never seen you wear a hat,” Winston says. “Or even a coat with a hood on it. Not that I don’t dig the pea coats, but they don’t cover anything from the neck up.”

“That’s what I have you for.” The hair stroking resumes. “To provide hoodies when my head gets cold.”

Winston closes his eyes. “Mystery solved. Dupin was a very inferior fellow.”

“And Lecoq was a miserable bungler,” Taylor replies, perfectly mock-incensed, eliciting one last laugh from Winston before he stops thinking about anything at all.

[confusedfangirl13]

Rules: Go to this website and list 15 of your biases, then fill out the following.

I wasn’t tagged by anyone, but I got the idea to do it when I saw @jinyoungsir do it and it looked too fun to pass up

1. Mom/Dad: Ravi (Vixx) Let’s be real, I would take full advantage of having Butt around, because he’s cute as hell

2. Sibling: Wonpil (Day6) He’d be the best brother in the existence of brothers. Hugs and cuddles all day, everyday, without question

3. Grandma/Grandpa: Donghae (Super Junior) He’s the grandpa that spoils all the grand kids rotten and doesn’t care what the parents have to say about it

4. Haunts You: Leeteuk (Super Junior) The ghost that’s been haunting my house since the early 1900′s. Startles me at the drop of a hat when he’s bored

5. Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Han (Stray Kids) Hell yeah. The softest boyfriend with the cutest cheeks incoming

6. Ex: Taemin (Shinee) He’s the cute ex that’s still friends because the breakup was mutual and he’s too nice to be nasty about it

7. Best Friend: G-Dragon (BigBang) My BFF for life that I go to for fashion advice

8. Proposed to you: Jimin (BTS) Aw sorry Jimin. The answer would be no because I’m not ready

9. Your Boss: Top (BigBang) The intimidating boss that is secretly just a big softie. He doesn’t like it when people see that side of him

10. Random person you met at a bar: Dami (Dreamcatcher) The stranger that I talk to while waiting for another drink. It’s a five minute conversation at most, then I never see her again

11. Rival: Lay (Exo) He’s practically a God at everything he ever does. Also doesn’t have a mean bone in his body, so you can’t hate him. He’s too nice

12. First Kiss: Wonho (Monsta X) It happened when we were 12 because of a dare from someone at a birthday party

13. Drunk & Singing karaoke with: Youngjae (Got7) a.k.a the time where we have too much fun and have to practically be dragged back home by our friends

14. Played seven minutes in heaven with: Leo (Vixx) It’s an awkward seven minutes just making small talk because he’s too shy to do anything else

15. Gave you your favorite dessert: Jungkook (BTS) Which I would promptly share because I can’t eat an entire cheesecake myself. And the muscle bunny could work it all off 

I don’t have anyone to tag, but anyone can feel free to do this if they so choose. I’m curious as to what everyone else could get

[journey-into-weirdness]

"Ned and the Nude” Comic Script by Walt Jaschek

Here’s the script for our “Ned and Nude” Simpsons Comic audition. It’s not “How to Write Comics the Walt Jaschek Way.” But it might give you a peek into my approach.  Simpsons are © 20th Century Fox. Created by Matt Groening. (You are my hero, Matt.)

COMIC SCRIPT “NED AND THE NUDE” The Simpsons Writer: Walt Jaschek

PAGE 1

Full-page splash.  In the foreground is a cute, female ART MODEL, her back to us, her head turned so we can see her face.  She is very, very NUDE.  One long arm thrusts out and bends back to her hip.  Framed in the space between her arm and body is our hero, NED FLANDERS.  He is sweating.  With one hand, he tugs at his pink collar. With the other, he hold a paint brush up to an canvas on an easel.  But the paint is dripping and smearing: he just can’t focus!

CUTE MODEL:  What’s WRONG, Mr. Flanders?

CUTE MODEL 2: Why won’t you…

CUTE MODEL 3: PAINT me?

FLANDERS 1: Well, I… [GULP!]

FLANDERS (thought 1:) Great gobs of GIDDY-GOO, man!

FLANDERS (thought 2:) Get a ho-ho-HOLD of yourself!

STORY TITLE:  NED AND THE NUDE

END PAGE 1

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PAGE 2

1 – A classroom.  From behind Ned. Across the room, the silhouette of the model, her hands on her hips.  Ned is turning to look up — there’s a hand on Ned’s shoulder. And a cigarette burning from the hand!

Voice (from off): YES, Ned. You do seem a little… “UPTIGHT.”

2 – Reveal: Marge’s sister Selma. She is chain smoking, pontificating like a self-important teacher.  Because in this class — she is!

Selma: STUDENTS!  Did I not LECTURE this class on the need for a true NUDE FIGURE ARTIST to let GO!…

Selma 2: GO!…

Selma 3: [[cough!]]

Selma 4: GO?

3 – A three-shot. Ned, at his easel. On the left, a little behind: Marge, also painting at an easel. On the right, also a little behind: Barney.

Ned: Oh GOSH, Selma!  You’re the best darn ADULT EDUCATION ART TEACHER here at EAST-LOWER SPRINGFIELD JUNIOR HIGH!

Ned: It’s JUST that…WELL…

4 – CU of Selma, scowling.

Selma: WHAT, Ned? WHAT?

5 – A shot past the model as Ned leaps up from the easel — he uses one hand to cover his eyes. With his other, he points to the model.  He can contain himself no longer.

Ned (yelling): The HUMAN BODY is OBSCENE!

NED (yelling 2):  And LOOKING at it is a mortal SIN so SEVERE it’ll yank your SPLEEN out!!!!

6 – 2-shot. Ned is artificially calm now, grinning sheepishly at Selma and making a circular gesture with his hand just above the surface of his canvas.

NED: Plus, I’d feel better with more time for the “UNDER-DRAWING.”

SELMA:  Grr!

END PAGE 2

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PAGE 3

1- Exterior shot of East-Lower Springfield Junior High.

SELMA (from within): Are you GETTING this, class?

SELMA (from within): Ned is EMBARASSED — by THIS!

2- In foreground, Selma gesturing to the tableau behind her. The beautiful, nude model. Holy cow! She looks like Britney Spears! With gigantic bosoms! And this is no normal pose: she’s holding a whip! While sucking on lollipop. Wearing (as it turns out) fishnets! About to get into a bathtub! While a fan blows her big hair.  In other words, a bunch of obvious cheesecake cliches.

(Selma’s word balloons hide the model’s naughtier bits.)

SELMA:  Merely by THIS:

SELMA 2:  A completely NATURAL, NORMAL BODY…

SELMA 3: …in a completely NEUTRAL POSE!

3- Selma leans in to taunt Ned. He holds his head in his hands.

SELMA (whispering): Is it because she looks like BRATNEY SPHERES?

NED: SWEET LORD IN HEAVEN! YES!

4 – Selma tosses the nude model a robe.

SELMA: ACHTUNG, my so-called “ARTISTS!”

SELMA 2: When deconstructing the NUDE…

5 – Selma dramatically pulls the straps of her Moo-Moo from her shoulders.

SELMA:  You must DIVORCE yourself from POP CULTURE CONTEXT!

6 – Floor level shot, past Selma’s disturbing, naked legs. The Moo-Moo is bundled at her feet. And in the background, our cast so far (Marge, Smithers, Barney) gasps in horror.

SELMA: (from above:) And THINK only…

SELMA 2: SEE only…

SELMA 3:  (Yelling):  MASS!!!

END OF PAGE 3

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PAGE 4

1- Same exterior shot as panel 1 on previous page. But now legions are running out the front door, still wearing paint smocks, paint hats, and wielding wet brushes. Who do we see here? How about… Chief Wiggums, Doctor Hibbard, and Apu…

GROUP SCREAM: AAAAAAAAAAAA!

2- Back inside. Ned and Selma. Ned is holding two thick paint brushes covering his eyes so he can’t see. Selma is putting her Moo-Moo back on.

SELMA: Yeah, this won’t work EITHER, Ned.

SELMA 2: We need a QUORUM to meet MODEL FFES.

NED:  [WHINE]

3 – Cut to: another part of the room. WILLIE, the Scottish groundskeeper at Springfield Elementary, is… ripping off his shirt! He’s really buff — super-hero buff! And he’s coming right at us!

WILLIE: HOW about THIS, Flanders…

WILLIE 2:  …ye wee bit o’ POOFY-BOY?

SELMA (from off):  WILLIE!?

4- Willie has pulled his pants off one muscuar leg, and has the other muscular leg in the air, pulling the pants from it. Flanders and Selma look on, amazed.

WILLIE: AYE!

SELMA: !?

NED:  EEK!

5 – Willie, lying on his side now on the model platform.  We’re looking past Selma now, and only her arm and lit cigarette hide his nether-regions.

WILLIE:  If it’s a BODY divorced of CONTEXT ye be needin’, PANSY-painters…

WILLIE 2: Grab y’r tubes of YELLOW OOOOCHRA…and HAV’ AT!

6 – CLOSE-UP OF NED.  He is holding two paintbrushes in the sign of the cross, as if stopping a vampire.

NED: No! NO! I won’t rendereth WILLIE, EITHER!

END PAGE 4

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PAGE 5

1- Ned points to his own booty as Selma his fellow artists look on.

NED: I can’t gaze upon ANY “BOO-TAY” that’s not in its God-given GARMENTS!

MARGE: But NED…

2 – Two-shot. Marge and Barney in front of their easels.

MARGE: THEN you won’t PASS the CLASS!

BARNEY: Yeah! And you’ll be doomed to REPEAT it FOR-EVER!

BARNEY 2: Like ME!

3- Ned consults a huge, 3-inch thick catalog, which he evidentally carries with him. On the cover: SPRINGFIELD ADULT EDUCATION / SPRING “SEMESTER”

NED: B… But I NEED to pass!

NED: It’s REQUIRED for admittance to ART 199:

NED: “The Art Of The FAMILY CIRCUS!”

4 – Ned is on his knees, burying his face in folds of Selma’s Moo-Moo.

NED: PLEASE, Selma — Is there ANYTHING I can DO to PASS…

NED: …that DOESN’T involve PAINTING the PANTSLESS?

5 – Selma puffs out a smoke ring and Flanders stares hopefully through it.

SELMA: WEEEELL — I can think of ONE “academic OUT.”

SELMA: It’s not really FAIR…

SELMA: …but it doesn’t break any COMMANDMENTS!

6 – Close-up of Ned, fists clenched, delighted.

NED:  I’LL DO IT!

END PAGE 5

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PAGE 6

Full-page panel. Taking up most of this panel is the nude figure of … NED HIMSELF! He is standing on one foot. The other foot is cupped in one hand, and the leg is bent accordlingly. . The other hand is behind his neck. He is contorted… and content. He looks almost like a human ice swan. And he has a rose in his teeth!

NED (thinking 1): SAY…THIS isn’t so bad!

NED (thinking 2):I guess if I can’t MAKE art — I can BE art!

NED (thinking 3):I feel so…LIBERATED!  So LOOSE! So…FREE! But then…

NED (thinking 4):That could just be the BREEZE!

And, looking past Ned, in a small horizontal group shot at the bottom of the panel, simultaneously reacting to this pose, is…

SELMA (pleased, framing him with her hands): FREEZE, you gorgeous MAN-CHILD!

MARGE: GASP!

BARNEY: NICE!

WILLIE: ACH!

SMITHERS (thinking):  C’MAGNIFIQUE!

CAPTION:  THE “END”

END PAGE 6

Read the finished comic!

[laresearchette]

Tuesday, March 14, 2107 Canadian TV Listings (Times Eastern)

And Welcome to Day Three! 

Yesterday, we took the D train, visited Central Park and it’s endless supply of climbable rocks, statues and lookout towers. We had a hot dog from a cart, which was proclaimed “not very good and too small.” We went to a Duane Reade and purchased an item not available in Canada. 

We walked down Broadway to Times Square. On the way, I did see the Ed Sullivan Theater (!) and purchased a t-shirt at the Hello, Deli (!!) from the one and only Rupert Gee (!!!). We did hit the M&M Store, which greatly pleased my 8 year old. 

For dinner we went to Juniors, which was delicious and had amazing cheesecake. 

As for today’s snow, it looks doable, but very windy. Wish me luck!

And now...

WHERE CAN I FIND THOSE PREMIERES?: TRIAL & ERROR (CTV) 10:00pm/10:30pm ADAM CAROLLA AND FRIENDS BUILD STUFF LIVE (SPIKE CANADA) 10:00pm

NHL HOCKEY (SNPACIFIC) 7:00pm: Wild at Capitals (TSN3) 7:00pm: Jets at Devils (TSN4) 7:30pm: Leafs at Panthers (TSN5) 7:30pm: Lightning at Sens (SNEAST) 7:30pm: Blackhawks at Habs (SNWEST) 9:00pm: Stars at Oilers

DENE: A JOURNEY (APTN) 7:00pm: Eugene returns to Tulita for a visit and a chance to go hunting with his uncles in the Sahtu Mountains.

SONGS SHE WROTE ABOUT PEOPLE SHE KNOWS (SUPER CHANNEL 03) 8:00pm: Carol, an emotionally repressed woman, loses friends and alienates people when she begins singing songs she wrote about people she knows. But she unexpectedly inspires her boss, to whom she dedicates the song Asshole Dave, to attempt to reignite his dream of becoming a rock star.

RICK MERCER REPORT (CBC) 8:00pm: Rick tries out a self-driving car; Rick attends the annual Griz Days winter festival in Fernie, B.C.

THIS HOUR HAS 22 MINUTES (CBC) 8:30pm: Melania Trump reads ``Oh the Places You'll Go''; Michelle Rempel wears her sommelier hat; the Newfoundland and Labrador curling team; another Anne of Green Gables reboot.

FIRST DATES (SLICE) 8:00pm/8:30pm

SCHITT’S CREEK (CBC) 9:00pm: David's ex comes to town to do a photoshoot for Moira; Johnny and Roland think Bob is cheating at poker.

WORKIN’ MOMS (CBC) 9:30pm: Kate tries to make up for her upcoming time away; Anne tries to bond with Alice; Frankie crosses a line with a buyer.

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF TORONTO (SLICE) 10:00pm

WHL HOCKEY (SN360/SNPACIFIC) 10:00pm: Victoria Royals at Vancouver Giants

A PLACE TO CALL HOME (BBC CANADA) 10:00pm: Anna presents Elizabeth with her manuscript.

JADE FEVER (DISCOVERY CANADA) 10:00pm/10:30pm: The Bunces set up a new mining camp in hopes of impressing their urbanite business partners; tempers soar when Claudia and Robin clash with their son Josh while unloading some platforms. In Episode Two, the first boulder of the season proves challenging to get back to camp; once the Bunces and their crew finally get it there, Claudia and her new partners disagree on the best way to cut it.

[michealkearns-blog]

Dinner At The Club.

There are various sorts of dining establishments to decide on, yet if you're trying to find an enchanting atmosphere these recommendations will definitely help you make the proper collection. My overview was actually Marjorie Gersh-Young's book Hot Springs and Hot Pools from the Northwest which offers instructions (including GPS works with) to most recognized warm springs in Idaho as well as surrounding states. This year, in an initiative to advertise a more healthy and balanced time within households, Summertime Palace has developed a different way in providing their homecoming supper. A best situation will be possessing a candle-lit supper in a private hotel, but that may be any place so long as there are actually marginal distractions. Liquify an envelope of jelly in very hot water and also contribute to pair of mugs from tomato extract. He generally obtains his very own breakfast as well as for dinner I correct him a vegetable or even salad with hen, turkey or even beef. I may merely see the potential son-in-law appearing for supper resplendent in a cooked chicken hat. The Imperial Feast Reunion supper is only on 7 Feb 2016 and also begins at 6:30 pm as well as sets you back $138++ each. To steer clear of the clutter of dealing with raw chicken during the night, this delectable supper dish is actually created totally in the house utilizing premade elements. Bite sized puddings including biscuits, mini , cupcakes, little scones can easily accomplish your supper efficaciously. Make use of the practice session dinner as a chance to thank all of them for constantly and also initiative they have actually put in. As an example, adolescents that eat supper along with their household are less expected in order to get jumbled in medications, liquor or even various other wrongful task. I devised the Metlund and Chilipepper hot water requirement systems due to the fact that this had very lengthy in order to get hot water. . In any case as far as theAFFI and also FFHOF is anxious Gerald Thomas is actually the maker from the Frozen Dinner. The cash thrown away on the supper could Strenght-Men20.Info possess been a lot far better used helping the impoverished; unless The One regards herself to become underprivileged also. This quote stems from Comey's summary of a face to face dinner he had along with President Trump at the White Home on January 27th. Katarina Reveche, a junior at Campbell Hall of North Hollywood, had a Christmas supper from pig chops and waffles. You could desire to load some devices such as jewelries and also chokers to wear on the official dinner. If you straggle to dinner you may not possess enough food items to eat or even there could be an area for you at the dining table merely considering that you were late. This is possibly the second very most popular present to offer to a supper gathering range as well as the most well-liked in this particular group is most likely the cheesecake with a close runner up being chocolate covered. Typically at the end from the Thanksgiving supper the bunch and the helpers are swiftly ladling leftovers right into numerous zip hair bags and covered containers. Robin orders the personnel not to, fuming as the wedding rehearsal supper started ten mins previously and also she is actually right now in a laser device tag surveillance workplace awaiting the authorities to come in. This is accordinged to my expertise as I prepare dinner for my partner that is overlooking teeth. A basic candlelight supper could be one of the best intimate presents you will definitely manage to give an individual on Valentine's's Time. The foods which are actually body fat cost-free and create you drop weight include clubs, soups, desserts, warm beverages as well as shakes.

[chronicalanxiety]

Here’s the younger version of the kids™ in the show’s style

I’ll just copy paste their description from the first artwork down below:

Zap Apple

Rainbow  and Applejack's first-born child and Lil' Cheese's best mate. Zap is a  daydreamer and has a gentle soul, he's that one ripped nerd that likes  writing and drawing things just for the sake of it. Exploring and  discovering new things and places is what really makes his eyes glow  (history and geography hoe), so he can be usually seen carrying his  saddlebag around all the time (you never know when you're gonna need  sketching and exploring supplies). Zap also loves puzzles and is a huge  fanboy of Daring Do Books like Dash (and adventure books in general. AJ  swears it's because Rainbow used to read so many Daring Doo adventures  to her belly when she was pregnant). While he can be smart, he tends to  over-thinks things, Zap has a wide imagination and is easily one of the  most compassionate ponies around, though he used to be easily coaxed  into fights or manipulated by his feelings. Like a good apple family  member, the boy loves farm life and has a strong fraternal instinct, but  his nature just doesn't allow him to settle there, though he still  finds some peace whenever he's back in the environment he grew up in.

Random facts:

- Zap loved wearing his Ma's hat so much that she gave one for him as a gift in a Hearts Warming;

- He lost part of his his right ear to a bad fall when he and some friends went exploring one of his first off-limits area;

- Loves collecting comic books and stamps;

- AJ entered labor right during a Zap Apple harvest (Yep, that's exactly how he got his name);

- Inherited AJ's stare and lie detector;

- Upon noticing Zap's resemblance to his great grandmother, Rainbow nicknamed him Baby Smith.

Applejoy

Rainbow  and Applejack's middle child. Applejoy doesn't take her name for  granted, she's a total sunshine and bringing people happiness is what  really makes her happy. She tends to be famous for getting a bunch of  bruises all the time and being a little too reckless, so much so she  lost two of her teeth out of pure clumsiness when she was little and had  to wait until they began to grow to get them back (still has the best  smile), and she also used to break her flying goggles at least once a  week. The girl is also very outspoken and sincere, though it can end up  being a problem sometimes. Applejoy is the family's Poly Athlete and has  strong and fast wings (as well as legs, the girl is speed itself), she  doesn't do very well in school but makes for it in sports and is very  disciplined when it comes to it (Rainbow is her personal coach for every  occasion). She hates losing, but tries her best to be a good sport and  not to show she's upset most of the time. It was also awfully difficult  for Applejack to handle her being all over the place when she learned  how to use her wings (no need to say she was very grateful when her next  child was born an earth pony).

Random facts: -  Inherited Rainbow's habit of napping on trees (Applejack didn't like the  idea, she was always concerned her children were gonna fall and hurt  themselves for being too cloud-headed);

- Loves to indulge in her  mother's sugary treats;- Rainbow started calling her junior (or AJJ)  because her name abbreviation is the same as her ma's. No need to say  the nickname was a success;

- Sleepwalker;

- The bandana she uses around her neck is a part of the fabric of an old sheet she used to nap with;

-  Likes a bunch of crafts, specially wood-carving, but isn't really  gifted at most of them (doesn't matter because she always tries her best  every time).

Cider Splash

Rainbow and  Applejack's youngest child and Tank's best buddy. Cider Splash a  performer at heart, he's a innate dancer and plays multiple instruments  very decently, he's the loudest of the bunch in every way and talks  everyone's ears off (some conversations can also turn into musical  numbers for no apparent reason). He's the most headstrong and stubborn  out of the three, so he'll almost always get really deep into a project  (or anything, really) when he sets his mind in it. He has blessed hoofs  like AJ and is by far the one who ends up helping with the applebucking  stuff the most, though he has a natural charm with the farm animals and  prefers playing with them (his love for animal plushies wasn't taken for  granted). He also indulges in cooking (mostly by Big Sugar's  influence). Cider was always jealous of his sibling's ability to fly, so  RD tries to compensate by taking him for a ride every once in a while  and making sure he's the first one to get Wonderbolts tickets whenever  they perform.

Random facts: - His love for music  started when Applejack bought him a toy guitar to get him out of his  tantrums when he was little. Later, his grandpa Bow Hothoof gave him a  mini drum set as a birthday gift. AJ and RD weren't very happy when he  started playing it all the time and making a bunch of noise, but they  eventually saw potential in it and started investing in his inate  talent;

- No need to say cider is his favorite drink ever;

- His bandana was a handmade gift from his Aunt Applebloom.

Florence

Fluttershy's  big baby and Agate's older step-sister. Florence is a very resourceful  and hard-working young mare, though she tends to spends way too much  energy worrying about results and is almost constantly on the verge of  outright panic (she's usually seen gritting her teeth or generally  flipping out, no need to say she does not fare well under stress,  specially when she is given a task to complete). Florence is known to be  very sensible and intelligent, and even though she sometimes puts her  own paranoia before common sense, she usually manages to find logical  solutions to problems. She learned how to deal with stress by canalizing  it into something productive, thanks to Rarimom (which ended up being  another source of anxiety, ironically). She also has very strong  beliefs, and when forced to question them, she becomes very upset.  Despite that, Florence is extremely loyal and kind and will go out of  her way to help other ponies.

Random facts: - Her  scarf was given by Rarity, it made her feel safe when she was little,  and she still uses it until this day (Her moms had to bribe with her in  order to get her to let them clean and wash it after months of using it  non-stop);

- Probably has OCD;

- She has also been known to  retreat into her imagination when under extreme stress, often picturing  peaceful, grassy fields or tranquil landscapes to calm herself down.

-  Florence loves her coffee, tea and Fluttermum's pets more than her life  (She loved growing up around pets, they still give her a sense of calm  and relaxation. Her mom used to use them to calm her down when she was  crying or couldn't sleep, she would almost always fall asleep after  caressing some pet's ear for a while)

Agate

Rarity’s  most precious gem and Florence’s little step-sister. Agate has been a  very independent gal since she was little, she has been described as  curious, monotone and sarcastic, and also appears to be more logical and  mature than some of her peers, typically being the one to call them out  on their ignorance, she’s inclined to remain passive and stoical to  most things that happen around her. She has a fuckton control over her  emotions and wears a neutral expression about 80% of the time, but is  actually a pretty chill gal and has a very good (and weird) sense of  humor. Agate has a great eye for photography (specially Avant-garde  stuff) and turns out working as a professional photographer in the  future.

Random facts: - Lowkey a huge mystery fan and computer nerd;

-  Has a huge soft spot for Fluttermom's pets since she first came in  contact with one, she can’t help but to smile the whole time she’s  around them;

- Discord's favorite gal right next to Fluttershy.

Lil' Cheese

So  let's get this out of the way, the script says Lil' Cheese is a colt,  but many people see them as a filly, so they ended up being non-binary  in my headcanon because I couldn't decide their gender (but go with  whatever suits you better).

"Don't worry, Zap and Cheese got  another infallible plan". Cheesecake, AKA "Lil' Cheese", is first and  foremost known for the ability to talk their ass off anytime of the day  for whatever reason (they used to spend most of their time besides their  mom, so no need to mention that they practically picked up all her  goofiness and energy by osmosis), they're also an excellent actor and  are known as "The God of Puns". They’re generally a popular and gifted  student, however, they're foul-mouthed and kind of competitive (but  despite that, they are generally well liked and always looking after  their friends). Lil' Cheese uses their innate talent for comedy and  natural charm and charisma to help attract attention to their mum's  bakery. Cheese had pretty deep random conversations with Pinkie since  very little, so they turned out to be a pretty good conversationalist  and improviser.

Big Sugar/Little Mac

I don't  really have a very elaborate description for him (sorry peeps), but I  imagine Sugar as a very sweet (pun intended) Big Baker Boy that loves  cooking (and eating, most of all). He has that big bro energy and always  gives the best hugs, but can also have with no mercy when messing  around with his peers. He's very well liked around Ponyville and known  for his extroverted and warm nature, though he may care way to much  about other's opinions and tends to take a lot of them personally. Being  a proud member of the Apple Family, he's the embodiment hard-work and  loves working on the farm, but his heart always feel in the right place  whenever he's preparing meals for other ponies.