#i also think maya was a sort of - the grass is greener on the other side memory bc we all have one of those

[spynorth]

I find it hilarious that when maya shows up at lucas’ door and basically says ‘tell me the truth or you’ll never seen me again’ he agrees and then this shit happens:

“why did let me believe you were dead?” “alright. I went to prison for 8 years. is that good enough?” “prison. why? did you kill someone?” “no.” “did you hurt someone then?” “no.” “i suppose you’re innocent.” “no.”

he is purposely evading the actual answer to her question by subsituting truths which is lying. you know. the thing he said he wouldn’t do. but he’s got the upper hand. she doesn’t know whats truth and frankly, the prison thing does easily slide in to his initial excuse when he first finds her again of having to get away because of something he did and not wanting to bring it home to her. He did go to prison for 8 years but that is not why he didn’t return to her. He had already been living as lucas north for 7 years at that point if you’re operating within the fact/idea that series 7-9 is all the same year (which is a ridiculous timeline considering he was supposed to have been section chief before going to the russian prison and when he stole lucas’ identity he had only undergone the beginning tests but you know what. he sleeps with a gun under his pillow. we have bigger fucking idiot things than that).

but anyways, maya and he both have already acknowledged that he vanished for 15 years. I can only assume he offered prison as a vague answer hoping she would perhaps believe something happened during prison that led him to stay away the remaining 7 years after. She seems to buy the answer well enough and her next two questions are also easy for him to answer, this time with not quite such an obvious lie. Did he go to prison for killing or hurting someone? no. but he’s also presenting truths as responses to a truth he gave in false context so i would still personally consider that lying. this is a thing that allows him to both alleviate any possible guilt he may have in regards to not fully telling her the truth and also a great example of the fact he is still very much assuming he’s got everything figured out and settled. he’s still confident in the hold he has on things. why wouldn’t he be? it’s been 15 years and he’s successfully pulled the wool over mi5′s eyes. and i know there’s a million excuses we can make. would i be honest in that situation? probably not. but i also hope i wouldn’t be dumb enough or selfish enough to drag a former flame back into my life given the circumstances but hey. who knows.

[virmillion]

//ignore me, long post ahead

ok so obviously them in the off chapters vs in the on chapters will have to reveal things about their personality/inner thoughts/home life/whatever that they absolutely refuse to tell anyone else, even though these things have a way of leaking through when you least expect it. to that end, i think it would be rather fitting if the kid DMing is the youngest of a family with a bunch of brothers and sisters, or the child in a family that’s not necessarily traditional (so grandparents live there, aunts and uncles and cousins, so many relatives on a constant rotation such that you never have a moment alone to breathe - you don’t get lonely, per se, but you can still feel alone amidst the chaos). more specifically, i don’t think they should be the DM right away, either. you should have them try to go as a PC at first, the most basic pre-built character sheet possible, no backstory, and they just hang back, do the rolls when asked, and don’t really participate. the person running it (probably the teacher, but maybe just a kid that’s nicer (NEXT PARAGRAPH)) notices this kid (now called James, subject to change) hanging back and is like ‘hey, um, i’m no good at telling stories, do you want to give it a go?’ and james goes ‘uh, i guess, i don’t know if i’ll be any good at it though...’ and no one really cheers him on or anything, just kinda nods and picks at their nails as the seats get shuffled around and james tries to pick up where the og DM left off. now he’s literally been Handed a chance to be in charge, and he’s definitely going to fumble it, and maybe try to convince someone else to DM, but everyone refuses - at first because they Want to be PCs, but later on because they like how james runs it, and they want to support him as he finds his voice. (james absolutely protests outwardly about ‘having to’ be in charge the whole time, but deep down on the inside where he would never tell anyone in a million years, he’s secretly thrilled that he has his own little world here where people will actually listen to him, and care about what he has to say).

og DM kid will now be called Kate (subject to change). kate is the DM at first because she’s always got a story, maybe she’s the oldest sister in a family with a single mom or something, and she’s always been forced to be in charge, the polar opposite of james’ situation (except that they both have big families, it’s just that james is at the bottom of the totem pole, and kate is at the top, and they both wish every now and then that it could be the other way around for themselves, grass is always greener and all that). so kate’s arc (wow lab breaking out the big guns when you literally haven’t even started an outline, huh?) is gonna deal with learning that it’s okay for her to put herself first sometimes, that the world won’t fall apart if she takes a second alone to breathe, and also there might maybe probably be a little spat/falling out between her and james at some point, re: grass is always greener, since they both think the other should be grateful for what they have.

generally speaking, there should be an even mix in terms of how characters play their PCs. that is, some kids might be (metaphorically) pink in real life, so in the game they could play as green (the polar opposite to how they are outwardly, maybe the equivalent to how they are inwardly), they could play as red (how they act outwardly but amped up to eleven, which would allow for their PC to go through a character arc as well (YIKES)), they could play as orange (close to how they are outwardly, a little different than normal, stretching their comfort zone, that sort of thing), they could play as blue (far from what they would consider their personal brand of normal, but still a little closer than zero to how they actually are, either outwardly or inwardly). you’re using the words ‘outwardly’ and ‘inwardly’ a lot in this thing, so i would say that, once you actually get this one going, it would be smart to draw up a chart for what each character is like/deals with in reality (column 1), what each character plays as in terms of behavior (column 2), how similar/different this is from what they deal with in reality (column 3), the arc that [column 1] will have to go through (column 4), and the arc that [column 2] will have to go through (column 5). you should also set aside some lists of which kids interact a lot in reality, and whether that carries over into the game. for example, if suzy hates maya in reality, will PCmaya try to befriend PCsuzy and get shunned in the game? will PCsuzy try to rally everyone else not to trust PCmaya, or even talk to james about making PCmaya secretly a villain? ideally romantic relationships won’t play a huge role in this because duh, but if they do, there could be some harbored tension among a few of them, like, say, timmy and billy used to go out and now they’re awkward-friendly-uncomfortable, so that will strain their character relations in-game as well as being something they’ll actually have to deal with in reality.