#i am constantly battling my body to adhere to a somewhat normal sleep schedule | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yardsards · 1 year

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i think the issue with having an extremely inconsistent sleep schedule is not that your overall daily schedule will be out of wack (i am quite fine with changing schedules) but rather that all hours of the day are Schrodinger's Bedtime. like, going to bed just feels like An Option at all times and this leads to a lot of laying in bed almost dozing but not really sleeping

#eliot posts #i BRIEFLY got my sleep schedule back on track but then i got sick had to sleep all day to recover and now it is Bad again #and then before that it was STABLE for a while but...#i was going to sleep at sunrise every day #which was Bad #bc by the time i woke up it would be almost sundown #so time completely stopped feeling real #fuck the winter darkness i am moving to the fucking equator as god intended #we must ALL come to brazil (or ecuador or kenya or whatever)#but seriously tho like why is my default circadian rhythm to FALL ASLEEP AT SUNRISE #it has always been like this and it happens in all seasons #(isn't too bad in the summer tho bc there's more hours of sun and also student schedule lets me Live Like That)#i am constantly battling my body to adhere to a somewhat normal sleep schedule #bc alas being a member of society means i have to be awake and doing stuff at certain times #scheduling meals and activities a certain way and avoiding blue light does NOT fix shit #keeping a regular schedule can help sometimes but is‚ again‚ an uphill battle against my body #i should honestly try getting one of those seasonal depression sunlamps and staring into it at like 10 pm every night #trick my brain into thinking it is sunrise (and therefore time to sleep)#(also i tried melatonin supplements once and it made me feel like my bones were trying to slither out of my skin #and i had a panic attack and didn't sleep that night. so i am too terrified to try THAT again)

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