#i am sucking and fucking that thang enthusiastically

[dudeslut]

Alright I'm gonna say it: dick size like does not matter to me at all. Like maybe I'm overly needy and sensitive, but I'm gonna be moaning, "you're so big," and, "you're so deep" when we fucking no matter what. I don't care how big or small, you're gonna be hitting something that turns me into a whore for you. I'm all about hyping up the beautiful man and man-adjacent dicks that I fuck with. And yes this absolutely includes tdicks. I'm gonna ride that shit. I'm gonna leave you satisfied and more confident because I want your dick and your spirit feeling good after you're with me. Anyway I'm a huge fucking fag who has so much love to give and I ain't holding back ✌️

[jpthakid-blog]

◤ being apart of something special, makes you feel special ◢

when a random newspaper enthusiast ( they’re calling themselves reporters now ) asked jp to do an interview about his greek row world, he was elated at first. it wasn’t everyday that someone asked jp about himself ( which everyone should, his life is fucking amazing ), so he was brushing his hair and spraying his body spray as usual, til it dawned on him: what the fuck was he gonna say? not that it wasn’t known, but jp loved to exaggerate certain things about himself & his experiences. for crying out loud his name isn’t even jay patrick - a name he uses, as well as a variant of his real name, often. so, how was he going to play this? honest & deep? fun & action-packed? he didn’t know, but he wasn’t gonna not be himself that was for sure.

the reporter set up his camera in the ekt common room. jp was applying a bit of blush to his cheeks ( yes, he wears make-up, what of it? ) as the guy got out a notepad.

"so,  what’s your name, age, grade, role you play in the greek system (president, vice president, social chair, member, pledge) and what house you are in and why you decided on that house”

“first off, how are you? you good? you lookin’ great, lovin’ the hair. don’t evah let someone tell you not to dye your hair blue. over there lookin’ like sexy smurf, you bettah werk, bitch.”

the reporter smiles, running a hand through his hair.

“anyway though, to the folks at home ya’ll can call me jp or jay patrick, but if you wanna write me a check for the fliest mo-fo since space jam, jeremiah merrick is always at your service.  i’m 21,” he points to the camera, “who tryna link up for a sex on the beach?” he winks, “i’ma junior, and i’m a member of epsilon kappa tau. ekt till i die!!” he barks, throwing in a dog howl, “this house was a no brainer. check it, we rich, we fly, and we party till we die. we also got a bomb ass color scheme and that’s really important. ain’t nobody tryna be out here in shit brown tryna stomp the yard.”

the reporter snickers "uh, are you a New York native? If not where are you from and what brought you to NYU? Do you like the city life?”

"real talk, i used to hate new york. i’m from north carolina, right, so we loud down there but we not ny loud. you know how fuckin’ annoying it is when you’re not the loudest bitch in a room? like i’m tryna explain myself and this sara ann chick cutting me off with her shenanigans. that’s another thing i won’t get used to -- random people cutting you off mid-sentence. like, damn john you’ll get your turn to talk about your new tanning bed, back back.”

"with all these thoughts you must be a psychology major, right? or a theatre major? If you had to choose another major right this second that had nothing to do with your current one what would you choose?”

jp pauses, “why i gotta be a theatre major? is it ‘cause i’m loud and black?! the nerve!!”

“no, no that’s not ---”

jp starts laughing, “i’m just fuckin’ with you, man. nah, i’m not a theatre major, but that was my second choice. i’m a dance major. i’m a b e a s t with these legs, bruh.”

the reporter takes a deep breath, "you’ve been in the greek life for some time, any crazy stories you can share with us regarding your time in a fraternity? Were you hazed as a pledge?”

“nah, nah, see you tryna trick me into sellin’ out my frat. nah, jp ain’t a snitch.” he folds his arms over his chest, then leans forward, “but, if you tryna pay me then i can tell you what true hides under his bed. hint: it vibrates.”

"speaking of true, what is your relationship with the higher ups in your house, do you think they could be nicer? Meaner? What about your fellow members and the pledges?

“i mean errybody cool in their own way, ya know? i’m not that tight with everyone which is my bad. i don’t like being tied down so i kick it with a lot of people on greek row. but i think true doin’ the damn thing with his faxhawk headed ass. you think there’s a club of hot bald dudes i don’t know about? just a bunch of fuckers runnin’ ‘round shining each other’s head talkin’ about the good ol’ days when they had hair? i think about that every time i look at true. i bet if he bent down i could see my reflection on the side of his head. he cool though.”

unsure how to react, the reporter pulls at his collar and continues, “What, uh, what’s your favorite and least favorite class so far? Are you on any teams or in any clubs? If so how is that?”

jp wets his lips, leaning back in his chair, “favorite’s gotta be film appreciation. i mean it’s a mad early and fucking long class -- that’s the type a class make you rethink why movies gotta be 2 hours long. like damn debbie just suck his dick so we can roll credits. but, nah it’s lit. we just watched, uh, shit what’s it called? run loila run or something like that. it was nice and had like no dialogue. a lot of running though. like that bitch was gone. least favorite is african american writers of the 1920s. my professor picked a lot of slave books, which, i get, ya know, but roarin’ 20s, was that not a thing? i get it, we used to pick cotton, but i swear there was other shit poppin’ off too.” he shrugs, “i’m a cheerleader! ra-ra, bitches! i love every second of it. special shout out to my boo thangs!”

“so you must’ve looked forward to gaining a lot from this school year, then?  Is there any event you wished you attended; maybe the first game of the year, or the first debate?”

jp shakes his head, “i don’t try to set some goal like that, that’s that new years type bull that i don’t do. i was just looking forward to growth. bein’ better and fiercer than yesterday. i didn’t make the first game ‘cause i twisted my ankle, but i was back and shakin’ my pom poms all up and through new york by game three, sooooo...”

"If you were asked to put your current most important item into a time capsule what would it be and why? Do you think ten, twenty years from now that item will still hold an importance in your life?”

tilting his head in thought, jp takes a moment to respond, “see, my most important thing can’t be put into a capsule. the most important thing to me is my personality. who i am, what i do, that keeps me goin’. if i bottled that into a capsule the lid wouldn’t even close, my guy, but it’s for damn sure still gonna be important to me years later. i am who i am. i don’t hide that from anyone. i’m loud, effeminate, confident -- proud as fuck.”

"i hear that. What are your thoughts on the other fraternity/sororities apart of Greek row? Is there one house you dislike, is there one you are envious of, is there maybe one you are scared of?”

“you diggin’ for dirt, i see you. out here tryna be the male rita skeeter. but, nah, like i think all the others frats and whatnot are chill. no beef, no qualms. at least on my end. whatever dirt you tryna find, you should point that shovel towards kappa alpha. it’s always some shit with them. it’s like a taco bell bathroom over there 24/7. i’m all for dramatics, but i don’t do drama.”

"well, with that in mind if you had to give three pieces of advice to an upcoming freshman in terms of rushing or being apart of a fraternity what would you tell them?

“stay away from kappa, run bitch, run!!!! nah, i’m fuckin’ with ya. listen, ya gotta listen to your gut and follow through. your instincts are always right. secondly, be you. no one wants to be around a fake person all the time. this isn’t bravo and you are not kenya moore. and lastly, if you’re ever uncomfortable don’t be afraid to speak up. can’t nobody make you feel dirty without your consent. hazin’ or otherwise.”

"Do you actually feel like you are apart of a brotherhood? Is that the most important thing of Greek Life? Why did you choose to go Greek?”

“shhh, don’t say that i’m tryna make true my one and only. why you tryna be incestral?!” jp chuckles, “on the real, i think we can all be closer. go skinny dipping and hold each other’s penises for support type, but yeah. i got brothers for life. i chose greek for the lessons, the parties, and the experience. i never would’ve gone to australia or sucked my 4th dick -- shoutout to juan from club inferno! -- without goin’ greek. so, go greek and suck a dick, kids.”

"this was quite an interview, man. do you wanna sign off with a quote you believe describes your time so far this year?”

“a quote from my carolina beauty maya a always brings me joy. and it goes a lil’ somethin’ like this, ‘My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.’” jp bows.

“thank you, jp.” the reporter shakes his hand.

“thank you, sexy smurf.”