#i cannot explain the way that simple realisation makes me feel in my mid twenties
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#whenever i think about the fact that#I'm likely going to be this alone till the age of 50#bc if im here after 50 I'm walking into traffic sorry i don't wanna live that long#but when i think of that and think of it daily#it makes me scream#i cannot explain the way that simple realisation makes me feel in my mid twenties#like what was the point in surviving the wretched teenage years#and all the years after that#for someone going insane every second im doing alright#if you're not wondering what the point of it all is i envy you#pls ignore bc I'm on me period and it's wrecking me as usual#but anyways i hope the universe is kind#like do not bless me with longevity i beg
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