#i chose ants because they infiltrated my kitchen the other day

[scratchandplaster]

Dulosis

CW: sleep deprivation, white/noise torture, creepy/intimate Whumper, defiant Whumpee, hallucinations

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

The room was as barren as it was functional, two square meters of locked space. They called it a white room, but the walls were padded with dusty-gray foam, which he already tried to pick apart. In no way did the tapered spikes budge.

Not that this changed anything, the noise was still kept inside. It came once every half hour, he counted, a deafening sough in close intervals, at least one minute in length.

Counting was the only thing he was able to busy himself with, though, so he didn't mind when they decided to change the frequency up to put the ungrateful guest on edge.

On the third day, he ripped a button from his cardigan, throwing and blindly fumbling for it. Another game, another way to keep the last sliver of his mind in place. He remembered vaguely seeing this trick in a documentary about Alcatraz, a little how-to experience about keeping sane in solitary confinement.

The issue wasn't the silence or the solitude; he preferred that to being kept downstairs and playing house with a person he barely knew. That fucking psycho snapped, he had thought when they shoved him in here, food or water missing since day one.

No, it was the noise.

The chaos that dug itself deep into his brain's fissures, keeping his mind alert and body awake even after what felt like eternity. 

The ants came after the fourteenth alarm, he counted that too, crawling through the barely visible slit that was separating him from freedom. A few at the start, but where they came from others waited for an equal opportunity, and soon the floor was sprinkled with them, too large to number. On his skin, his lashes, pushing his lips apart to engulf every pore with the prickly tap of their countless feet.

And then they were gone again, nothing but foam and noise for a while. They would return, no doubt, and with that knowledge he started to get thankful for the scheduled terror, just barely. Scratching at the back of his senses, the thirst that dried his body up from the inside had become just a minor problem.

At one point he could hear his own intestines working; pumping, contracting and rhythmically meandering to the sound that just so snapped him back to reality.

Again.

And then again, never a warning beforehand. Did that happen in the documentary too? He couldn't tell anymore; didn't know anything. Mind so fuzzy, he nearly caught himself wishing for that freak to come back and open the door, turn off the sounds, anything to let him rest.

Now, after cowering on the ground with both hands pressed tightly against his ears, so nothing would crawl inside, there came a new fuss. A single light click, then another as the heavy steel door moved outwards and his captor's silhouette blocked the entry. The sudden brightness left him nearly blinded, another misery piling on top.

"Hello there, I nearly forgot about you."

The friendly chuckle they let rain down on him felt like poison. But they lied through their teeth, spending every quiet minute they stole from their captive to plan the inevitable outcome, success now prickling right on their fingertips.

The cowering mess at their feet let out a weak hack, voice sore from misuse: "Let me rest."

Bloodshot eyes met an unmoving stare. There was no room to negotiate.

"Ask nicely, sweetheart," the shape offered instead.

"You fucking-"

Without another word, they turned on the spot, ready to leave him stewing in his own misery. Maybe five days weren't enough, they could wait.

The room was practically filled with his stare that clung to their back, heart thrumming so heavy in his chest it felt like it would burst out any second. Not willing to give up the last sliver of freedom he had kept safe so carefully, but too weak and confused to do anything about it, the words just slipped from his lips.

"Nonono wait, I'm sorry. Stay. Stay!"

He wanted them to keep talking, to hear anything else than that ingrain blare, the thrumming of his heart, the legs crawling along...

Behind the veil of quickly forming tears, he could see his captor halt and turn. More? Did they want more of this? Living the lie with them, just as a short break, maybe. A workaround. Get strength back and try again. If he made it that far... Just to rest for a bit.

"Please," the hurt voice pressed out, "I'm j-just so tired. I won't make you any more trouble."

"Again," the shadow replied, voice warm as the summer noon. They knew he was so much closer to what they imagined. The other sessions they had together were not as successful, but finally he seemed to let his guard slip. Almost there.

A lone sniff could be heard in the room, more closet than anything.

"Please. Can I please go to sleep, just for a bit?"

It was over for today. Other fights would come, ones he would win, or so he assured himself.

Fights he would give up again, his captor knew.

Nearly gone again, he was quickly brought back by the thin smile that crept across their face, victorious after all. They gave a single nod that made the sore loser fold into himself, eyes closed and face flat against the barren floor.

Maybe the light will stay on too. Oh, please stay on, it's safer that way...it's safe.

A warm palm gently placed itself on his matted hair, not touching but resting in a most innocent gesture.

"Not in here," they whispered, "Not after you're finally behaving, dear."

The hand slipped down further, and with it the reassuring touch. He was being pet, a part of him recognized. A small price in the end.

Hand placed in shaking hand, he was pulled up to face the victor of this little game.

"Come on. You will love it."

More carried than led down the hall, through blurry and burning vision, he could see doors beside them passing. They pulled him around the corner and through the wooden doorway onto a bed, ready and freshly made.

The heavy comforter atop the sheets seemed too pristine to hold his filthy body, but his captor didn't seem to mind one bit when they dragged him under the white heaven. Both would clean up tomorrow, the next step that was oh-so carefully prepared.

The shaken man shouldn't dare to forget how divine this felt, and if he did, their special room would still be vacant for another time.

As he was tucked in with peaceful humming right behind his ear, his mind sank into the comfort he had denied himself for such a long time. And for this moment, freedom traded in for peace, numbing sound for forced touch, he believed it was worth it.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

Thanks for reading 🤍 [Masterpost]

[icharchivist]

So! New sessions with friends! we watched from 105 to 117! So we watched the first part of the attack on the castle session, from Knov infiltrating the palace  up to after the “Since it’s none of your business” scene and Knuckle coming back to fight Youpi!

A. is Her, T. is Him.

-A: “I’m trying to avoid the spoilers of your blog. It’s hard it’s like Hisoka avoiding Gon’s punch. So far all i know is the last thing about Kurapika, it was hard to ignore… i know Leorio is getting some place with i dont know what and Zodiac stuff, i dont know what it is. and i know Meruem died like he lived: heterosexual”

 -T: “Knov’s plan is good… but it’s as tight to play as that other guy’s thong.” T: “….. it’s gonna end up on tumblr right?” 

 -As knov uses his power to behead an ant, T: “fuck thats cool!! if you could do that in assassins creed…”

 -A, at the begining of Morel v Leol: “i knew Morel was a Metalhead. it showed.” 

 -A: “i want a blog full of out of context picture of hxh” 

 -A: “why are they fighting on orangina”

-they squeed when ikalgo was back. T finds his hat cute akdhkd 

 -T: “TAKE THE OCTOPUS WITH YOU” A:��DONT TAKE HIM WITH YOU KEEP HIM OUT OF DANGER” 

 -A: “please tell me nothing happens to the octopus”

 -T: “I seriously love this octopus. he’s an exemple for us all “

 -Pouf started to be overdramatic and they stared in horror like A: “… is he okay? the ultimate dramaqueen omg. its like a shojo”

 -as Youpi looking at Pouf’s breakdown T: “*voicing youpi* the job is great but the colleague, no so much” 

 - A: “Don’t bother going with a plan against the King, just play gungi against him until he rips all his limbs. like Gon, don’t fight him, just tell him to jump off a cliff and he will”

 -A, at Pouf: “arent you done being the third wheel”

 -A: "It’s not easy for Youpi to be with both Pouf and Pitou at this point…” 

 -They started laughing at the King asking for his name to the royal guards

 -when the king says he’s King and dominate everything: A: “meanwhile you get completely controlled by a blind girl. and i thought he was getting better, but hes just a moron” 

 -Narrator : “one day before the selection…” A: “....and the king is more straight than ever” 

 -We made a pause to prepare some tea. as we did i joined T. in the kitchen and he jumped bc he didnt hear me come. direct reaction: T: “tf why did you supress your nen”. my friends are dorks 

 -Morel: “who could have hurt the king? ”  A: “himself, like a huge moron” 

-A: “omg Pouf is a Butterfree ” 

 -A: “i don’t think I’m reassured to see “you can try” on the old man”

-T: “where the fuck is the old man, he’s supposed to be the one attacking the King and we’ve never seen him again, we’re ten minutes to the attack on the castle” 

-As the king is giving the order to lift the En:  A" “hes a moron. but he makes it easy for everyone…” 

 -A: “I’m just saying that if you let them all three more weeks, the king will tears away all his limbs, Pouf will kill himself and you’ll just need to stop the selection and the other two and everything will be fine. or Youpi will end up killing Pouf because he can’t stand the violin anymore” 

 -T: “It’s the plan: Gon has no plan so he could adapt to any situation” 

 -Killua: “why would the king hurt himself?” A: “because he’s as stupid as Gon” 

 -A: “i like Morel. he’s the cool guy” T: “he’s like the cool uncle” A: “it’s good a character with some nerves” T: “at the same time with all the weed….” 

 -A:“why do Knuckle even remove his jacket? it must be a condition for his power. be shirtless.” 

 -A: “I’m curious who Netero brought… it couldn’t be Ging right??? it would be a mess T: “its probably someone op af” 

 -they screamed when Zeno came on screen, they didn’t expect him -

when Zeno recorded message starts, T: “dont tell me it’s his sextape” 

 -A: “Zeno is a vlogger” 

-A: “Netero was good looking when he was young” T: “True” 

 -A: “I love interesting old characters” 

 -At Netero’s training: A: “what was his motivation, did someone break up with him” 

 -T. considers Netero’s fighting style is really too cool. he loves it. they both argue he’s really good looking while young 

-Netero: “I’ll teach you if you give me stuff to eat”, T: “god thats me” 

 -as the attack starts: A: “Chloé i don’t like your smile i’m scared” 

 -A: “Killua is like in Good Omens: “It’s a family business. we gotta go” 

 -they were extremely quiet at the realization Komugi was wounded, during the scene we discover it. They were really into the intensity of the moment, it was seriously chilling

 -T: “it’s fun because after all those slowmo the opening of the episode is like at normal speed”

 -A: “i don’t mind the slowmo. they make clear that it is because too many things are happening at once. although i do hope it speds up a little…” 

 -they find Youpi disgusting and they yelled “no” when they thought he was gonna kill Morel

 -they really like Morel and Knuckle and Shoot and when Shoot hit Youpi to get Morel’s weapon, they cheered and want them to be safe forever 

 -Me: “it’s interesting how killua kept telling Gon to stay focused on Pitou but still go out of his way to protect Ikalgo while Gon stays motivated, you would expect the opposite”  A:“tbh i dont care as long as the octopus is okay” 

 -when Killua kills the guy to protect Ikalgo, T: “you call that supressed their ability to fight, I’m calling that murder. he overkilled.” 

 -A: “Pouf kinda looks like Kurapika.” Pouf: *acts dramatic* A: “okay no never mind” 

 -A: “no but Pouf is pretty and it’s a fucking butterfly I’m jealous” 

 A: “couldnt they teach him another music to play with his violin im.” 

 -Narrator: “pouf is at the limit of fanatism” T: “ye, on the other side of the limit, he’s totally into it” A:“i’d say he’s in love”

 -A: “i almost pity Pouf” T: “well he’s the least cruel one..” 

 -as Gon sees the king A: “no Gon!! it’s too big for you!!” 

 -same scene: A: “i don’t like Gon’s look… Killua if you want to knock him down it’s now”

 -T: “A DRAGON. I always side with the dragon. *sings* calm on my dragon ” 

 -in the “let’s go” scene: A: “i dont like Gon’s look… i dont like Killua’s look… I’m so scared of what’s gonna happen it’s… scary.” 

 -A: “i don’t like the idea that they’re gonna have to chose if they want to kill Pitou and Komugi or not… I don’t like the idea they’ll be in the same room as Pitou anyway…” 

 -A: “Pouf is a fucking pokemon”

-Narrator: “Shoot fights recklessly withot caring for his life” A: “at the same time when you learn from Gon…”

 -T: “let’s be real tho we’re just all waiting for the fight between the king and the sensei” 

-A, at Welfin: “i… honestly don’t know what to say about that thong tho.” 

 -Gon and Killua just arrived in Pitou’s room. they are scared at Gon’s eyes  

-Killua: “Pitou is like a mother protecting her kid” A: “*immiting Killua* “oh the complete opposite of mine” 

 -as Gon’s eyes are empty: T: “he’s really scary…” A:“he reminds me of illumi…” 

 -They are seriously scared for Gon. now they understand why i’m upset the anime removed Kite. They realize from what I explained that it was a stronger blow for Gon and the audience to know Kite from the start.

 -The “since it’s none of your business” scene just happened. (also it was well translated in the French sub version so yay). They are. speechless. but they react the same way i did the first time, ie, more worried for Gon’s mental state than anything. 

 -Gon: “I’m fine” T: “he’s not fine” 

 -We discussed a bit about Gon’s and Killua’s mental health so far and development and they really agree with me. they are concerned for both, since eventually it would have been solved if they talked, since neither talked about their troubles up to that point. but they feel for both of them and see how this happened, and i didnt have to argue too much about it, I’m glad. 

 -We rementioned the gi arc. T: “oh the good old times where the only problems were bombs.”  Me: “Do you get now why i laughed when A. said the gi arc didnt have lot of stakes” A: “now we have them……” 

 -They miss Kurapika and Leorio still. we all agree it would have been better at least for the kids’s mental health if they had been there… 

 -T: “why the FUCK Zeno is coming back home by feet” 

 -Cheetu teasing Zeno, saying he’ll fight against Zeno, A: “no but i almost feel bad for cheetu seeing how unfair and unballanced it is”  

-they gasped as Silva arrived. A. had her hands on her mouth in amazement. A: “that’s not even an ability it’s just summon the son” 

 -As Shoot and Knuckle talk about going back to fight Youpi : "they have... a really misplaced pride" 

 -Shoot: "Please hit him for me" T: "no no you misheard he said bring me to the hospital. go see the octopus" A: "I know an octopus, he knows a guy"

So we had to stop, and it was... amazing. They were invested in the fight, understood the struggles, and are truly looking forward to more, it makes me happy!

It was a nice day dkfjhf