Tumgik
#i could do something productive but instead im making memes
evilmagician430 · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
boyfriends but awesome (and instead of a webtoon its an independent webcomic)
design notes and 3ds flipnote concept art below the cut
general notes abt their designs and what the comic would be like in my head:
>they dont have names in this version cause i think that was one of the good things they did originally. i imagine they refer to eachother as "that one" "the other guy" etc like the dhmis guys when talking about eachother.
>they are not in a defined romantic relationship with eachother because i think thats more interesting, the polyamory aspect would be kept (im not polyamorous btw so im not gonna try to write an established polycule) but its more vague in that they all kind of have a thing for eachother but also hate eachother and want to rip eachothers guts out. and theyre all roommates and bffs. if you asked them what they were the answer you would get would be "friends who are boys". they are the height of male friendship, hate, love, etc.
>instead of focusing on sexualizing them in strange ways and doing boring moe shit it would lean into the comedy aspect BUT NO MEMES OR LATE 2010S SLANG !! this was something i could not fucking stand when reading the original (if you couldnt tell by now i did used to read boyfriends. it was a regrettable time and in redesigning and overhauling them i hope to make something good out of this wasted period of my life) like even when it was current boyfriends always made memes feel.. out of place. like as soon as they said it it wasnt cool anymore. it was the unfunniest shit ever
>i wanted the characters to look less WHITE and also more distinct from eachother and also less young cause in the original its like the same twink 3 times in different haircolors and their Chad. said chad is the best character only by way of not being annoying. so yeah i'll be more specific later but none of them are white and i gave them all different eye and nose shapes and distinct physical traits and bodies etc.
>mostly i just did this cause the "nerd" and "goth" ones piss me off so bad like thats not real. thats not a nerd thats just a nondescript waify femboy with glasses. thats not a goth, thats a tiktok eboy. and i felt bad for jock being trapped in this comic. and the prep one i feel nothing towards hes the most accurate to gay preps irl because they really are that annoying. but i tried to make him a little interesting atleast. anyways
Tumblr media
nerd - black, brony, always aggressively corrects the others when they state an incorrect fact, really into playstation eyetoy and obscure playstation games. insanely autistic. usually pissed off if hes not indulging himself in something he likes (yaoi, games, ponies, figures, etc). i just wanted to overhaul him completely to make him almost nothing like refrainbow's nerd because nerd type characters are always the ones i tend to see myself in and are my favorites but reading the webtoon that guy just pissed me off fr.
Tumblr media
jock - 2nd gen chinese american, one of the things i liked in the original actually was when they sexualized the jock (probably cause hes the only one who doesnt look 14 in that comic) and his big tits. hes a very genuinely kind guy, not the brightest, has a voracious appetite, he also still bakes cause thats cute i think.
Tumblr media
prep - he looks different here because i was originally going to make him white but i decided to make him a light/medium skintone black guy (he just wears a blonde wig and contacts). when companies make their pride month merchandise and advertisements this is the exact person they imagine in their head who is going to buy these products. hes a million percent one of those swifties who thinks taylor swift is secretly a lesbian. trust fund kid btw obviously. his only redeeming quality is that hes good at makeup. jokes in the comic are usually made at his expense.
Tumblr media
goth - 1st gen latino american, specifically peruvian because i am a self serving motherfucker. hes a really big numetal fan and listens to like 2000s evil wolf amv music in addition to legitimate gothic. his face changed a little too between this and the final design. his outfit completely changed but its only because i realized everyone else was dressed for relatively warm weather so it wouldnt make sense for him to be wearing multiple layers of black. if i do cold weather outfits for them id def reuse this look for him. hes still trans but i think all of them are in my version. also they dont use labels for their sexual/rom orientation. except prep hes homosexual gay.
congratulations for reaching the end of this incomprehensible bullshit 👍 hope someone enjoys this but idrc if its just for me either
34 notes · View notes
chilapis · 4 months
Note
i just wanted to say that 1) i hope ur resting well and 2) im so enamored by the extensive analysis of both tartaglia's character and how you think he'd smell like i wish i had enough knowledge abt perfumes to do that myself ALSO i did NOT know there was a "tartaglia "perfume"" which is so endlessly funny to me ? even funnier how it doesnt match him as a character at all. they should just contact you to make his perfume instead for a new perfected release. also i thought that the one that had a handle that resembled a blade was really really cool and its rly interesting to see ur thoughts abt what he'd wear i chuckled imagining it as if u were giving him a whole presentation about what perfume you think he Should wear . sorry for rambling in ur inbox that whole post was just so cool
CLARA, hello! This is so sweet, hi; I hope you’ve been well. ♥️ Not to worry, I fell asleep literal . moments after sending the post because I was physically fighting for my life by the time I reached the conclusion.
Perfumes are quite easy to figure out if you know the basics of what you’re looking for. Is it masculine or feminine? Is it a clean scent or a dirty one? Is it floral, gourmand, woody, marine, leathery, something else — what is it? Search what type of notes make up such a scent. If you have any perfumes you really like (that is in your possession and you have experience with) or want something similar to, search that perfume up. Read up on the notes while you’re wearing the perfume and see if you can smell them; familiarise yourself with those scents. Find out what those notes symbolise, what they invoke, what effect they hold.
If you want a scent but have no “reference” perfume to work off of, that’s fine; follow all the steps prior to it. Search up perfumes that follow your description, but be careful to not buy a perfume entirely on the basis of its notes or ingredients. It’s always preferred to actually try the perfume out rather than blind-buy, because it might smell different to you or on you (because, again, personal body chemistry & body odour).
For example, I mentioned Russian leather as one of the “close but no cigar” special mentions; its notes include cedar, nutmeg, tonka bean, guaic; this leads you to imagine a warm, woody, spicy, scent. But it is not; I tried it in a fragrance store (I went to find Ocean leather, tried like seven different fragrances, and then left the place with Iberian leather which I am SO delighted with, it is such a thick and heavy scent I’m in love) and it wasn’t… spicy at all; it also had a few floral notes, such as rosemary and Pathouli, but I couldn’t smell the florals either. The basil, mint, pine and sage were TOO strong and it reflected a very, very… green mood. Maybe something that’d be a strong contender for Al-Haitham, but not really Ajax, and we don’t care about anyone except Ajax here so.
So I recommend just picking out a few fragrances that seem promising from their notes and accords, and then going to a physical store and confirming them for yourself before the purchase. Do not be afraid to ask if you can try out different scents there; I promise it’s all right to take your time deciding rather than making a quick, on-spot decision.
The presentation part is so funny to me though. Average Chilapis date. Me and the bad bitch I bagged through my autistic tendencies or however that meme goes.
I’m sick and tired of everyone treating Ajax like “oh my god my boyfriends so crazy 🥺” first of all, that’s my husband you harlot. And second of all I’m crazier than him. I will literally hold him in place and sniff him after dousing this man in perfume to see if it fits. And that’s not even MENTIONING the skincare routine and hygiene products I have to introduce this man to. I could not care less if you wish to conquer the world, you’ll do so smelling and looking good. This is peak Chilapis dynamic. v
Tumblr media
6 notes · View notes
m1ckeyb3rry · 5 days
Note
LMAOOO I’m about to rewrite and entire parody for aiku I’ll send it in once I complete it it’s funny it’s like the reversed croagunk trope instead of cockblocking it’s helping him rizz girls up
SHSHSH goodra underrated goat I do love its vibes sm legible and snores collecting dust in the basement LMAOO after that one convo about the moon/space manshine shenanigans it’s disappeared forever but I can imagine nagi sending snorlax out only for it to continue lying down taking up like half the field and whenever he tries to get it to move it just swats him with its arm and send him flying by accident LMAO
AHAHA Rin being so desperate he goes to Shidou (wait the Karasu beef full circling to that second lead idea we talked about way back when)
LMAO “not unproblematic” tullia catching strays but Karasu holding a mini grudge for having his baby birds electrocuted like they ran into a telephone pole because of lanturn is so funny
Wait yk a combo I think is funny yarou because it also means bitch/bastard in japanese LMFAOOO wait but shoyoi is kinda cute too the way barasu sounds has me cackling though LMAO bayosagi love triangle wait this could be a kdrama on its own
LMFAO lowk makes me wonder if Karasu refrains from fowl products because he’s like “those are my children…” but FR full circle development where he’s confident enough and thinks it’s ok to be mediocre ehdhsjshsj
LMAOO you should give him that fit in a goofy crack spinoff side episode he would totally wear it (imagine they have a musical number with the phineas and ferb dance style too)
Reo calling bachira banged freak and raichi shark teeth LMAOO truly teenage boy activities kurona also catching strays everyone calls him a midget too ok but two sides of the spectrum both equally as attractive barous cluelessness imagine he just goes “your hands are tiny” and instinctively does that finger bend thing over your fingers (im so bad at explaining i hope ykwim) while Karasu KNOWS and just has a shit eating smirk on his face maybe there is something about guys who style his hair up like that
I didn’t even consider that they didn’t exist oops but WAIT THAT MAKES THE IDEA GO HARDER I’m not crying bruh imagine reader goes to the safari zone and is like wait I thought beautifly didn’t exist here?? Is yayoi doing some pet project and then big reveal
LMAOOOO I lowk love when memes have the “running faster than chigiri” aspect it’s so funny like the bllk equivalent of running faster than sonic the hedgehog but SHSH NO PRESSURE im just happy to receive whatever you come across don’t feel obligated to look for one specifically LOL
NO FR because like what you want me to add a period?? Nuh uh I don’t enjoy those vibes which is why I also default to just using “…” too LMAO
AHAHAHA ok so maybe i do need to use proper punctuation when explaining stuff my b I definitely used a run on sentence when I explained that part so I’ll make it less confusing next time LMAOO that’s so funny thigh that would actually be really embarrassing if that WERE the case though
Wait I’m loving the drama of this Isagis last straw Karasu comforting mc (CRYING THE BROTHER THAT STEPPED UP) I fw this Isagi so hard the conflict and character complexities >>>>> and the added love triangle yayoi originally leaning towards Barou not Isagi BRUTAL I love it
Otoya being spike is so funny bro getting demoted but actually seeing how everything is so interconnected is really interesting since we’re like metavisioning looking at a universe you created imagine life being this interesting but anyways I’m not about to get into an existential crisis rn
The way you’re converting readers (me) and yourself is so funny HAHAHA
IT DOESNT MATTER IF I MEMORIZE THE ENTIRE DEX (not gonna happen) but wait i just realized what this means CONGRATS ON 1K!!!!! Not you saying “idk it might be awhile still since it fluctuates” literally one day ago LMAO but here’s to more miraverse shenanigans!!!! DONT WORRY DADDYS HOME SHSHSHS but THANK YOUUU I just saw the event so I’m running rn let’s see who I get inspo for LOL
- Karasu anon
PLEASE DO SEND IT IN OMG an aiku parody would be insane…i love how no matter the au/verse aiku somehow makes his way into infecting it w crack LMAOAAO he’s lowkey the face of the miraverse (in a diff way than nagi and karasu)
nagi’s goodra is so CUTE tbh honestly it’s one of his best pokémon too considering it’s a pseudo legendary (wait now that i’m thinking abt it so many of the characters EXCEPT reader have pseudo legendaries 😭😭😭…like chigiri has a dragonite, nagi has a goodra, hiori has a metagross, karasu has a garchomp, and noel noa has an aggron…meanwhile reader’s rocking w galvantula LMAOAOA) PLEASE nagi finally meets his match w his snorlax he asks reo if that’s what it’s like dealing with him and reo’s just like “yes 😐” omg wait potential ova that’s just nagi attempting to train his snorlax ⁉️
HAHA YESS this is the au i was referencing when i mentioned rin as a second lead!! i’ve had it cooking for a while but yes since nagi’s the main lead and karasu’s the bestie w weird tension (i’m realizing this is a format i utilize often) rin has 0 way of winning like it genuinely hurts him to know that reader would rather go for a) lazy dumbass genius or b) cocky rude weird hair over him LMAOAOAO that’s why in the smau reader calls him “poor kid” she’s not here for that bfb dating younger men era 🤫 nagi’s like a couple months older than her and karasu’s a year older than her she is NOT abt to go for baby rin (especially considering there’s a whole subplot with sae that’s again meant to subvert the reverse harem vibe while also still having lots of love interests)
wait this just reminded me that isagi is canonically older than nagi and both nagi AND isagi are older than reo KDBCJSKS
LMAOO no because given how much we’ve talked abt tullia bullying otoya it’s impossible to call her UNPROBLEMATIC (not that otoya doesn’t deserve it ofc) but for the most part she’s pretty chill it’s like specifically otoya who she messes with 😓 PLEASE IT’S LITERALLY KARASU’S OWN FAULT TOO if i had a nickel for every time karasu got cocky and challenged someone he was wildly unprepared to face w his team of baby birds i’d have two nickels which isn’t a lot but it means bro needs to be STOPPED 😭 it’s a good thing he gets garchomp later on i think garchomp will be 99% of karasu’s impulse control as well as his main battler
YAROU ACTUALLY IS SO FUNNY especially because both of them are kind of uhhh kind of bitchy (especially to isagi) but agreed shoyoi is kinda cute sounding!! bayosagi love triangle…i have many thoughts about it that i will get to TRUST but agreed it’s giving kdrama
see i feel like the mediocre thing relates to his end of the world comment in the egoist bible too so it’s like in character yk?? like now he’s SEEN the end of the world (almost) what with team x and their nonsense, almost witnessed all of his friends die (if reader hadn’t sent nagi back to help save everyone they would’ve been overwhelmed because karasu’s garchomp is legit the only one left) and nearly died himself, and i feel like that makes him realize ykw why should i gaf abt being mediocre or not mediocre??? him realizing that as long as he’s happy nobody else’s expectations matter to him…lowkey this DOES mean that fwtkac reader doesn’t really fit because he’s too happy post epilogue to care about a rival but actually wait yk what would be cute imagine reader’s like a pokémon nurse who comes out to do check ups on the daycare pokémon and make sure everything is looking alright but karasu ends up falling in love with her so for a solid while he just makes up illness and injuries to call her out for like “oh my lucario hurt his paw” and she comes out and lucario is just standing there like “😐” obviously not injured and she’s like ???? but eventually she ends up liking karasu back and then he asks her out and it’s all cute and adorable (pursuit reader is just glad he’s finally getting married because she’s been making fun of him for being the last one to settle down for ages…“how did otoya AND aiku end up in happy relationships before you???” “I DON’T KNOW”)
REO DOES NOT CAREEE HE’LL VIOLATE ANYONE i love villainous team v reo he’s so so funny and his crashouts are legendary 😩 PLS YES THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING like barou has no idea that you’re flirting so he’s super serious about it and he’s like “wow your hands ARE very small 👍” and does the finger thing (ik what you’re talking abt) but karasu starts messing with you because he knows you’re trying to rizz him up (he’s already rizzed up obviously i think if a girl flirted w him he’d fold in 0.2 seconds) but he’s so funny about it and it def culminates in him lacing his fingers through yours and using it as an excuse to hold your hand (he definitely calls you mediocre for having small hands as a joke though HAHAHA)
NO THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING LIKE IT MAKES IT 10X BETTER one thing about hiori he is going to LOVE his love interests like there’s something distinct abt the way i imagine hiori as the male lead he’s on a completely different level than the others…the closest in terms of emotions is probably nagi but with nagi a grand declaration of love is just him getting out of bed and like. cooking breakfast or smth 😭 so the scale isn’t quite the same…but hiori always goes all out in my mind like i’ve never imagined him being normal about someone he genuinely loves he always does insane shit like building a house or importing an entire species of pokémon instead of just being like “hey i like you” the way karasu (eventually) would JFJFJSSJ wait speaking of which your request for the event hehehe miscommunication/misunderstandings w hiori…i’m considering some things (i feel like that trope generally implies humor but it’s hiori he doesn’t give crack vibes to me…he’s like nagi i can only write him seriously unless he’s just a side character but trust i will cook smth up and it will be good)
PURSUIT ISAGI IS SM FUN I LOVE HIS CHARACTERIZATION because honestly he definitely thinks that he should be stepping into barou’s role as his best friend but he has zero idea how to do so meanwhile karasu does it so naturally (in this au i fucked w everyone’s ages so isagi and barou are a couple years older than karasu and are the same age as yayoi if i didn’t say that already) which is just another punch in yoichi “inferiority complex” isagi’s gut…eventually he does end up being kind of a cool older cousin/sibling to reader but it takes him a lot of effort to get to that point 😕 and for the love triangle i was lowkey think that yayoi would actually have originally liked isagi but isagi never pursued her (given that he thought she liked barou) so he kinda pushed her towards barou and she ended up falling INSANELY in love w barou (who wouldn’t) but that way the possible eventual yayosagi isn’t just her settling it’s her being like look i always liked you and maybe i still might but i have a lot of trauma from barou’s abandonment/death and isagi’s like yo me too let’s just be friends again and see where things go KDFHSKJDSMJDJS i lowkey love them as a trio and the relationships/duos within that trio honestly this is a version of isagi i would actually enjoy writing (ofc i’d have to braid in more of his canon characterization but this is a fun foundation to me)
OTOYA JUST GIVES SUCH SPIKE ENERGY i feel like based on vibes/lore alone, tullia is fluttershy, karasu is applejack, chigiri is rainbow dash, reo is rarity, otoya is spike, nagi is pinkie pie but like the opposite?? like he’s also incredibly random and insanely lucky with stuff but he’s super lazy instead of super energetic, and reader is twilight sparkle (not just because she’s the protagonist LMAOO)
HAHAHA BRO THANK YOUUU IT’S VERY UNREAL but AHH hiori inspo?? cheating on karasu i see /j 😭 it’s okay two of the twelve so far are karasu reqs…the way i only have four spots left and ZERO people have requested for nagi i think people don’t even realize how much i love him despite him being all over my blog because i never get reqs or anything for him 😩 or maybe it’s that everybody hates nagi atm so nobody wants me to write for him 😓💔 THAT’S OKAY THOUGH NAGI GETS PURSUIT SO WHO’S REALLY WINNING ⁉️
1 note · View note
lyrepyre · 1 year
Text
""liveblogging"" the first 10mins of the newest tom scott :D
THIS IS A LONG POST (press J to skip post)
(liveblogging in the sense that its live but itll only be one post, i guess this is spoilers but its a tom scott video so not sure what i would spoil, i also know VERY LITTLE about the subject of the video so dont expect me to start making peer-reviewed opinions on the content, this is about the video not the telescope. GO WATCH THE VIDEO!!)
(when i mention tom scott or 'him' im probably talking about tom scott as a channel and not as a guy, a lot of work goes into these videos by multiple people)
starting off with the title. pretty normal for a modern tom scott although the asterisk is interesting, i cant remember the last time he's clarified in the title, normally when he makes a 'hyperbolic' claim he explains it within the first few seconds of the video (this is why people like to talk about how he always 'gets to the point'). i suppose you could say that him putting '(yet)' at the end of the explosion measure-rer video is similar but here it feels more like a "tom knows that this is pretty much wrong" instead of a "this is technically true and here's why". the thumbnail is also standard for modern tom scott, he's become more familiar with the modern youtube 'guy pointing at/admiring thing' format and here he does it again, with the subject of the video in the background as usual.
the first surprising part of the video for me is the length, HALF AN HOUR!!! every time tom makes a long video its normally one of his best (itll be alright on the night is my favourite and in my opinion the best tom scott video (yes i like it more than the video about the youtube sponsor video (the origin of the vape meme (its not actually a vape!)))). from the length alone i know that this is a video i'll enjoy and so i metaphorically grab popcorn etc
now the video actually starts! he starts with himself in protective gear which is standard for his videos (except from when he does the 'this isnt what i expected' preamble which:) he does! he clarifies the title (as usual with the pseudo-clickbait titles) and talks about how he prepared a script etc etc, for a long scott video this is surprising, these long videos take ages to make so if he throws out the script something is different. and then:
TITLECARD!!
a titlecard essentially screams that this video will be high-production and GOOD. seeing writing credits is especially nice, with recent videos we can see tom acknowledge that it isn't just him making these, with 'alright on the night' there was a long end credit and for years he's put credits at the end of his videos, but here it is at the start, with himself in the same typesize and on the same level as his editor and script assistant, with an awesome rotating drone shot around the telescope (i think i would prefer if it was a drone shot at sunset for continuity with the previous section, but obviously getting shots at any time of day he chooses would be infeasible)
sidenote to talk about the captions. tom gets a company to caption his videos for him (caption+ by js* the majority of the time but i wouldnt be surprised if for some videos he gets someone else to do it). the reason i brought up the captions is that for voice-over the captions are in italic, which gets annoying to read long sentences of (yes i know academic papers and whatnot but idrc!!), in other videos captions for sentences spoken directly from tom 'in scene' are normally prepended by a dash, and voiceover is given no formatting, or alternatively no formatting for voiceover and tom gets his own colour. this switchup isnt major but i think i would prefer if it wasnt in italic, as first reading the captions it made me wonder if there was some sort of special reason it was in italic except from simply being in voiceover, but it seems there isnt.
re: 'scientists love giving names to telescopes like that', seeing tom scott make jokes in his videos or at least add a bit of humour to them is always nice, sometimes i feel his videos have become a bit too corporate and i loved the old stuff where it felt more personal (please PLEASE a return of matt and tom's park bench), so hoping that more jokes/casual moments are in the video, maybe even a post-credits quip. however for subjects like this where these videos are likely to come up in professional/educational settings, i can see that it makes sense to actually keep things professional (think tom on computerphile/language files)
tom clarifying that the agencies had no editorial control is sort of a given with tom scott videos, but its nice for him to clarify. sometimes in the comments therell be some random who gets mad at tom getting paid to cover it and paint it in a good light or whatever so its good that he almost immediately clears it up.
the way tom scott shows road footage and explains how he found his way around the site/area (the latter pretty usual for an 'unscripted' video) reminds me heavily of cgp grey's video on the tekoi test range, although that video is more of a vlog, so i guess tom's video reminds me of a vlog? not sure if thats a good thing or not
the footage of him walking through the residence with pristine blue pools and deck chairs while the voiceover explicitly states that its not a hotel is very funny, although necessary because i can imagine someone with more money than sense seeing this footage and buying a plane ticket to this middle-of-nowhere site in the desert because they want to be 'with the stars'
speaking of!!: tom scott's pinned comment (as of day of release) is weirdly poetic, 'and the stars were beautiful' originally made me think that it was a quote from hitchhiker's or a poem, but a search showed that no, tom just knows how to paint stories in peoples minds (and thats amazing)
another sidenote to mention the camerawork! a lot of the subjects tom covers are set in places like urban europe or some business park in california or whatever (the switzerland ones seem to be an exception with tom going all out with the camerawork, see the shooting range, the village with no cars etc, why does tom like switzerland so much??) so when its set in a place that looks cool it really makes the video a lot more engaging and tbh more awesomer, i love the shot of the petrol station and the wide shots of the 'village'
the drone shot of the very large telescope is also great, with simple 1080p im surprised by the quality of the rocky surface, and with 4k it feels like a movie. tom then completely negates this with the most whiplash-inducing offcentre blurry zoom on the extremely large telescope, i understand he wanted to show the distance between the site and the telescope but i feel he couldve done better. he then (i think) reuses the rotating drone shot from the titlecard but i think its cool so i dont mind
also: tom is quite clearly filming the voiceover from either the uk or somewhere in europe or america, and it is painfully obvious that he was at home/in a hotel and went 'i need a nondescript place to shoot, this forest near me will do'. if i was good at geoguessing/osint/geocaching(?) i would find where this forest is but im not so the 'telescope voiceover forest' will forever be unknown :(
this video has chapters but im not going to pick up on them too much because its a long tom scott video, so of course therell be chapters. does make the video cooler though. what i will pick up on is the uv index sign, which i cant describe any more than it just 'fitting', theres this vibe around it that makes the quick succession of shots much better and i cant figure out why, maybe because its a clearly man-made thing among nature or because you have to pause and focus on what it is saying to read it, either way i like it.
..and theres the twist that explains the title. most tom scott videos with these sorts of titles will have a twist of some sort that isnt a complete lie but helps to "clarify" the truth, here it being that its actually multiple telescopes! (:O) these sorts of twists have become mainstays of toms content now so there really isnt much to say, other than that it was there i guess
moving on though we have the first interview (an actual mainstay of a tom scott video). again i cant say much about the content of the interview other than the fact that the interviewee is wearing an awesome hoodie, especially fitting for an astronomer. i can imagine him coming into work beaming that he gets to wear his space hoodie for his space job where he researches space. this man is GOALS. what i will say though is that the 8.2 metres wasn't converted to imperial, which is what tom normally does for measurements, so i'll be the saving grace and say that 8.2 metres = 968.50393701 barleycorn. thank me later. the interviewee's captions were in a different colour (yellow) which is standard, and makes it even funnier when the yellow switches to tom's white when he explains the mirror mistake.
tom making callbacks to previous videos is always nice, its something he's started quite recently, presumably with the channel slowing down, sort of a 'protagonist reflects on the adventures theyve had', it also appeals to people who have watched lots of tom scott (like myself >:])
something that happens when tom interviews a super-expert on a topic is when he rephrases something or observes something (here being the precision of the telescope) and the interviewee just sort of brushes it aside, with the interviewee affirming with what seems almost passive-agressive responses (here being the shortest 'yeah' ever). i get that tom phrases it like this for the viewers, or so that he can understand himself, but it must irk the expert when the guy interviewing you is surprised that optical telescopes have to be precise
tom's gopro skills have definitely improved over the years, but i think they may be too good now, as i can see toms finger trace the path between all of the points on the telescope. this is really cool but seeing toms finger in the corner of the screen with the narration makes it feel like an interactive cutscene in the last of us, i feel like i should have an option to pick whether to be nice or mean to tom.
i feel like ive mocked tom a bit too much so im going to instead compliment him on how good of an interviewer he is. the classic rephrase/observation that i mentioned earlier is a great way to ask questions that although he might know the answer to, the viewers might not and the content of the questions and the attention to detail is just great. whenever i have a question its less than 20 seconds later that tom makes an observation and the question is answered.
the pov at 8:36!!! again with the your choices matter rpg cutscene tom!! theres also another unconverted metric with 30cm and 60m but im not going to make the joke again (i think tom said in a q&a on the park bench that he may only convert imperial to metric and not vice versa? i looked for the clip and couldnt find it and also i wouldnt be able to include the barleycorn joke so whatever)
thats 10 minutes!! i was originally going to do the whole video but that might crash my browser and the video has less non-topic related things to pick up on. it also means that if you havent watched the video and for some weird reason you read this post you can watch the other 2/3 of it. if for some weirder reason you actually read me ramble about a tom scott video then good for you i guess?
2 notes · View notes
justanapparatus · 2 years
Note
if you were thinking of making the taylor memes collection website, you could add all the links to the memes in a json file and then pull the data from that file instead of creating an entire database. of course as you said, the biggest problem would be sourcing all the memes. a more complicated execution would be something like this where i believe the person that made the lyric searcher used python to add the whole functionality of searching for keywords in all songs and react as the frontend bit because it's easy to make websites with react components (and she works at facebook that made react in the first place so it makes sense lmao)
what I really wanna do is more like the second example in that i want to make a search engine for taylors songs. i wanna have full text searching like the example u shared but I also wanna have the ability to search by fields so for example you could sort by co-writer or producer or co-vocalist or whatever AND I wanna tag themes (falling in love, heartbreak, family, etc) and motifs (gold, cages, midnights, etc) which might be a bit much for Javascript sksksk. sourcing the data would take forever since miss swift is freakishly productive and i want to include a lot of stuff but I can get song info from genius and motifs from @taylorswiftandx so I wouldn't have to start completely from scratch on that stuff but I have no clue how to go about creating a search engine lmfao the most impressive things I've made were a tip calculator and a countdown to red taylors version. probably what I'll do is start with some basic fields like title, album, and track number to figure out what the fuck im doing and then add the meat. my main concern at that point tho is that an entirely Javascript search engine with that much content would be suuuuuuuper slow but idk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
7 notes · View notes
moon42sstuff · 3 years
Text
Tumblr media
Made another dfo meme because this idea wouldn't leave me alone
2K notes · View notes
elysianslove · 4 years
Text
cheering you up ; haikyuu boys
synopsis; different ways the haikyuu boys care for you and cheer you up when you’re sad
pairings; karasuno x reader, nekoma x reader, aoba johsai x reader, fukurodani x reader, shiratorizawa x reader, inarizaki x reader
genre; fluff
warnings; none probably a bunch of mistakes lmfao
note; i had to repost this like 3 times rip. anyways, im sorry for not adding inarizaki on my last one jbshds but they’re here now!!
Tumblr media
karasuno ━━
sugawara koshi; i definitely think he's so in tune with you, and your emotions. he learns your cues very well, and knows every little thing about you that there is to learn. if you're having a bad day, he'll notice right away. he won't comment on it though. all he'll do is these little things to try to cheer you up, but it's going to be very subtle. he'll let u rest ur head on his shoulder, run his fingers through ur hair. he'll sneakily buy u ur favorite snack. doesn't bring anything up until you do. ends the day with cuddles and a chick flick.
sawamura daichi; he notices but he doesn't really know how to react. not because he doesn't know what to do, but because he doesn't want to trigger you or deepen your sadness in any way. he's very careful with you. if it's something throughout the day, he's very quiet and tender with you, just silently lets you rest your head against his chest and rubs your back/arm tenderly. as you're walking home he asks if you want to talk about it, and reminds you that it's good to, but it's also okay if you don't want to.
nishinoya yuu; not a single sad moment with mr noya here. seriously you cannot breathe. ok but in all honesty, when you're sad. he's sad. sends you memes, and you'll be laughing at them with tears streaming down your face because you don't really know what you're feeling anymore. he does a lot of tiktok trends with you, any of the couple ones. grabs your faces and ,,, smooch all over. until you have no choice but to laugh. if you want to cry even more, he'll watch the notebook and the vow a thousand times over, and be a sobbing mess next to you. just don't tell the guys okay? <3
kageyama tobio; he's so.   bad. at this please help him. like he can tell ur sad, bc he's v good at reading people. but like. what the fuck is he supposed to do. anyways. when u two get to be alone and he kinda notices how quiet you are, he just nudges you slightly, and pulls you to him. it's easier to talk to you, he's calmer, when he can't directly look at you. when he feels you start to shake in his arms, feels the wet tears down your cheeks as you start to sob in his arms, his heart kinda breaks. all he can do is hold you, but it's what you need. and he'll listen too, if that's what you need as well.
tsukishima kei; i think he notices, but doesn't bring it up at all. the way he goes about it is he'll tease you to try and bring a smile on your face. because this is tsukki, and you know him well enough, you know the truth behind his jabs, enough to appreciate them. if it doesn't work, he'll just start to make fun of people in front of you, pointing random people out with you and just being like "wanna bet on what's making their relationship fall apart" this sadist i stg. like suga, he subtly makes you feel better until you yourself approach him about whatever's upsetting. actually gives 10/10 advice bc he's v honest.
asahi azumane; he's so empathetic oh my god bruh. notices immediately. "baby what's got u so upset" w a big pout on his face and when u just mumble "nothin" so low he barely catches it and instead throw yourself into his arms, he gives you a big, certified asahi bear hug. doesn't leave your side at all. constantly mutters sweet nothings and encouragements. if you do the bare minimum like make it through class he'll meet you after and be all "im so proud of my pretty baby". cuddles all day. all night. he's not very good at advice but he is the best listener !!! so attentive and you'll feel a huge weight lifted.
tanaka ryunosuke; "aight who do i need to jump" type beat. u love him so much though. that one sentence and sentiment already has you feeling better. immediately hugs you so tight, borderline suffocating you. "wanna ditch school". 100% willing to do so. he doesn't really know whether to approach it with distracting you or facing the obstacle head-on, but he finds a middle ground. eats your feelings out with you. saeko pulls out the embarrassing ryu pictures and suddenly you don't know why you were ever sad.
hinata shoyo; is really oblivious for a bit tbh. when he first meets you at the start of the day and his hyperactive self is greeted by your duller, sadder self, he doesn't think much of it. it's when you don't react to him or interact with him the way you usually would that he starts to notice you being off. he's actually super straightforward about it, and approaches you with some of your favorite snack that he bribed ukai to give him for free and just "wanna tell me whats up, baby?" he's so, so easy to talk to. immediately you're venting. and he listens to intently, gives stupidly good advice. it's like such simple approaches to your problem but?? it works. anyways you love him.
yamaguchi tadashi; will be super worried about what he could do to make it better, and kinda just tries to feed you as much positive energy as he can. once he's comfortable with people, he becomes really chatty, so i see him talking your ear off with the biggest smile on his face that you have no choice but to kind of ? mimic it? he just radiates goodness and sweetness that it shifts your own energy. he on some witchcraft shit on god. anyways when he walks you home or something, he'll just stop for a min and avoid your eyes when he says "ik u dont feel the best, but i dont want you to have to hide that from me, okay?" stan tadashi <3
Tumblr media
nekoma ━━
kuroo tetsurō; drops everything. i mean it. i genuinely think kuroo would be such a good boyfriend that he'll sense it and text u as ur getting ready for school and be like "are u sad i feel like ur sad". you dont really wanna worry him and you'll just reassure him ur fine but he's already at your front door in — not his school uniform. insists the two of you take the day off saying "its fine babe im super smart". you two will spend the whole day just simply existing, talking when needed, he listens to you if you vent, and tries to come up with as many options of solutions for you so you don't feel weighed down. he'll make sure you eat even if you don't have an appetite, and will try to make u do something productive bc in a lotta cases, it could help you feel a lil better yk :)
kozume kenma; i pretend i do not see it — kozume kenma (2020). jbwjwks im jk. he's like tsukki in the sense that he will never address it, and he doesn't outwardly approach you about it. if it's just an off day for you, and you also happen to not have school, you'll go over to his house, hoping to feel a little bit better when you see him. "can i have a kiss, sunshine" to which he responds "why." you just go "im sad" and he gives u a big smooch. he'll have you lay on his lap while he plays his games, occasionally just sneaking in a peak at you to make sure you're okay. he'll ask if you wanna play to get your mind off things for a while. eventually, when things wind down a bit, he'll just mutter "yk i love you, yeah?" and that lights up your world hehe
haiba lev; as soon as he notices you're sad he just ☹️. he picks out a small flower and as soon as he sees you, he just tucks it by your ear, and smile so brightly and youll just be like "oh my god lev please stop being so cute". he won't really know what to do tbh, but the way he's so lost makes it so heartwarming and it honestly cheers you up all on its own. he just. "would a kiss make it better" and if you nod he'll just start kissing all over your face so softly, until he finally kisses your lips. when he pulls away he asks "again?" with a cute smile and if you nod he'll just kiss you over and over again. very simple way of cheering you up, and very foolproof tbh.
yaku morisuke; i think throughout the day, he might pester you a little bit about telling him what was wrong, but after you keep insisting you're fine, he relents, and decides that maybe giving you your own time and space to open up to him is better. he tries not to act differently in that sense, but he finds himself being a little more soft spoken, and gentler with you. i just had this image flash in my brain of you resting your head on a desk, head turned to the right, and then yaku comes and sits to your right, putting his head on the desk and facing you. and just. "hi :)" your heart melts. he kisses your forehead softly and tells you you're wonderful, in case you've forgotten. if, or when, you do open up to him, he'll be very eager to listen, and ready to fight off whoever upset you.
yamamoto taketora; this man is angry. like properly. "who the FUCK put a frown on my baby's face. speak the fuck up. i won't hurt you. ill just mutilate you." if you tell him that it's no one, and that you're just upset, he'll be so confused but he'll just nod and be like "okay. okay. do you want a hug?" and he'll hug you so tight. he'll admit that he doesn't like seeing you like this, and that he'll do anything to make it better. at first he's very cautious, but then he just lightbulb moment and as soon as you get home he'll be like "karaoke night babyyyyy" and then. no more sad.
Tumblr media
aoba johsai ━━
oikawa tōru; very. perceptive. he greets you normally, even if he notices something's off, because he won't want to worsen anything. you meet him right before he has practice after school, and he'll just cup your face, lifting them to brush at your hair, and you just sigh. "my baby's had a long day, yeah?" he'll be very gentle and careful with you, i'm sure. he gives you a kiss, smiling softly into it, and reassuring you that you're much too strong to let a single bad day destroy you like this. he meets you later that night with a lotta ice cream and you two just binge watch any reality show you could find, shit talking the actors together. he himself is terrible at talking about his feelings this dumbass >:( so he understands if you don't want to yk? will encourage u to vent it out though. expect terrible, makes no sense advice
iwaizumi hajime; he kinda like. gets mad? when you continue to be upset and not speak about it? he's not mad at you! he's just. mad. this is iwa okay. anyways. he won't bring it up mostly, only being slightly more affectionate, especially in his hand holding, which is super gentle already as it is. when he invites you over, that's when he actually starts to talk to you about it. he lets you know that there's nothing worse than seeing you like this and not knowing what to do, and that he wants you to be able to talk to him. about anything. even if you think it's stupid. he'll listen, and tell you that it's not stupid if it's making you upset. he cooks for you <33333 then bakes with you <33333 you feel a lot lighter at the end of the night tbh
hanamaki takahiro; (he's so annoying i love him). as soon as he sees you upset he makes it his mission throughout the day to cheer you up in any possible way. spams your phone while you're class with ten thousand wholesome memes. sends you pick up lines. when he meets you in between classes he just yells out "how's my favorite person in the entire world!" and kisses you so wholly in the middle of the school hallway lmfao. while he's walking you home, takes a longer route and purposely, he passes by your favorite store/bakery/ice cream parlor. buys u ur favorite, and pretends to be shocked when you give him a piece. late at night, he'll facetime you, wondering how you're feeling, asking if you needed to talk about it. whether you do or you don't, you two will fall asleep facetiming.
matsukawa issei; the minute he sees you he's like "whats wrong". no hi or anything. he has like this frown on his face, which seems off bc it's rare to see a frown on issei's face, and he just tucks your chin in his palm gently and stares at your pout. "you good, baby?" he can tell you're not, but he wants you to be able to tell him on your own. sticks by your side the entire day, and nobody really mentions it. he talks to you as if it were a normal day, but his voice has a softer edge. he's not distracting you, per se. he's more, talking to fill the space while giving you your own space to think. once you're alone, he'll just drag you to the nearest comfy surface, flop down, and pull you on top of him. if you even try to resist or ask whats going on he'll just "nap and cuddles first." and when u sleep a lil bit of ur sadness away, he'll just let you talk it out as he continues to hold you <333
Tumblr media
fukurodani ━━
bokuto kōtarō; just as empathetic as asahi, if not more. he really does feel it all with you. yk sympathy pains that partners get when women get contractions? bokuto is that partner. with bokuto, i feel like he'd never make you feel like you couldn't just straight up text him "im sad" and feel bad about it. if you ever do that, he'll immediately call, not even bothering with a text. if he can't come over, he stays with you until you've cried your heart out and then laughing until you can't breathe. if he can go over, he smothers you with love. repeatedly says "you know i love you, yeah? you know how grateful i am for you?" and in between kisses "im so lucky. so, so lucky."
akaashi keiji; i feel like as soon as akaashi notices you're down, or you're slightly off, he just grabs your hand and squeezes, forcing you to stop spacing out and focus on him for a second. if you're with a lot of people around you, he'll lean close to you and ask if you wanna go home. he'll be so soft and gentle and understanding, making up some excuse on the spot on why the two of you have to leave. if you're alone, he'll grab your hand and kind of tug you towards him, silently asking you to come into his arms, where you yourself know you feel safest. as soon as you're in the comfort of your home together, he'll like run you a bath and slip into it with you, just holding you until the water grows cold and the droplets on your skin are from your own tears. he'll wait it out, just holding you as reassurance, then make sure nothing's stopping you from spilling everything to him.
konoha akinori; when he first notices, he kinda deflates. like. who would wanna see their s/o like that? his smile is gentler when he greets you, and he's so soft with you. he grabs a pen and lifts your palm up, quickly scribbling down in his unique handwriting "i love you :) <3" on your skin, whispering for you not to wash it off until the end of the day. it is weirdly motivating tbh. as soon as the two of you are alone, he says it to you, face to face, an expected look on his face as if to ask "you know that, yeah?". puts on a movie to tune out the rest of the world, and holds you close to him as it drags on. he'll give advice if you're asking for it, but he's a better listener than anything else.
Tumblr media
shiratorizawa ━━
ushijima wakatoshi; does not notice. in all honesty, he expects you to approach him whenever you have an issue or if you're upset. he's kinda like ? so confused when you're so down and really unresponsive, until he starts to notice how touchy you are. like you're leaning more into his touch, holding onto his hand like it's your lifeline, stealing his vbc jacket because it smells like him. is very straightforward, and will just ask you if you're okay as he walks/drives you home. kinda just stops in front of your house and presses a kiss to your forehead, then pulling you into a hug. "please don't be upset." he won't tell you that it kills him, but you can sense the unsaid words. he urges you to keep his jacket when he notices how safe it makes you feel. greets you the next morning with a new cactus in a pot hehe.
semi eita; is very cuddly once he notices. you'll sit at a table in school and he'll be sitting next to you, but he just pulls you into him and lets you rest your head on his chest, mumbling softly into your hair "i know you're sad and it's okay." he doesn't say anything else, just holds you there with a few kisses in between until he has to let go. late at night, if your thoughts are still keeping you up, he'll be up too, worrying, and will text you at 3 am if u wanna sneak out to meet him. takes you to the park and lays on the grass with you, picking out stars and constellations in the sky, with a soft soundtrack playing from his phone next to the two of you. he makes you feel secure enough to be sad even if you have all the blessings in the world, and makes sure you know that he'll always be there for you, even at 3 in the morning.
satori tendō; cheers you up by making you forget literally everything. replaces the sadness in your brain with just pure serotonin in any way he can think of. he'll take you to an amusement park, get ice cream with you, take you to the carnival in town, to the park, to the beach, to the pool, take you up to his house's rooftop. literally anything. and then he'll say something like "life's too short to spend it being sad over anything, darling." he's so understanding, and if you're frustrated or something he'll tell you to let it out by like wrestling him or some shit. exhausts you so much and you're filled to the brim with dopamine. he makes sure you're always happy, never seeing a dull moment in your relationship with him.
goshiki tsutomu; freaks out. plain and simple lmfao. but once he like grounds himself, he just softly comes up to you and asks you if you wanna talk about it, or if there's anything he can do. if yes, he'll break his leg running to go do it. if no, he'll just sit with you in silence, leaning over to hold your hand, talking to you about volleyball and his aspirations and how well he's improving. he's better at distracting you than helping you face your issues, mainly because he stresses out about giving the wrong advice or somehow making you sadder. he'll take a lot of pictures of you together on snapchat random filters to try and cheer you up, then later on in the night he'll send them to you and be like "look how cute we are ugh what a power couple" i love this dorkhabsjsks
shirabu kenjirō; i think he definitely notices, but keeps it to himself. he’d maybe think he’s imagining things and that you’re okay, so he’d go about his day normally. he doesn’t see you after school, and that’s when he puts two and two together and realizes yeah maybe you are sad. so he texts you, and texts you, and texts you, and gets no reply, so he just. comes over. unannounced. uninvited. just straight vibes. he’s already ordered your favorite take out, and already settling in bed with you under the cover with the lights dimmed and some chick flick playing in the background. gives the b e s t advice because he’s so blunt. like he will tell you if you’re overreacting, but you’re still his s/o, so he’d like wince as he says it. that’s all the sympathy you’re getting <3 but his bluntness will shock you into laughing hehe
Tumblr media
inarizaki ━━
miya atsumu; usually, with atsumu, you’re always experiencing loud days. your relationship is all fun and flirty and suave and cool. but when he notices you’re sad, he goes quiet. like. eerily so. immediately pulls you aside somewhere private if you’re at a public place like school or something, and with his hands in yours he asks you if you’re okay. yk that thing where ur on the verge of tears and someone asks you if you’re okay and you just burst. yeah <3. his heart absolutely breaks and he just pulls you into a hug, resting your head on his chest and wrapping his arms around your neck. he just holds you there, even if you’re missing class/your friends are worried. he’ll stay with you until your tears have dried up, until you yourself let go.
miya osamu; i don’t see osamu as someone that loves pda. i feel like he’d be a more lowkey kinda guy. but if you’re sad, that gets thrown out the window. he doesn’t really in the moment, and won’t think too much when he pulls you close to his side and just wraps an arm around your waist/shoulder. yeah he’ll get looks but he can feel you trembling and shaking from holding back tears so yk, priorities. he’ll definitely stress eat with you. takes you literally anywhere and feeds you as you rant to him with tears streaming down your face and he’s just nodding sympathetically as he stuffs your mouth one bite after the other. romance is beautiful
suna rinatarō; when he notices you’re sad, his first response is alright what the fuck who messed up. he immediately blames someone else, and if he’s right, he’ll only get really agitated. just giving everyone the side eye from where you can’t see as he walks the two of you, your hand in his tight. if it’s not someone specific, he’ll just hum thoughtfully and then nod, before pulling you away somewhere private and just sitting you down and saying “talk.” very, very good listener. i can’t stress this enough. as you’re speaking he’s already thinking of a million different ways to help you solve your problem. walks with you as he traces your hands and just quietly tells you all the solutions.
aran ojiro; oh my god as a boyfriend he ticks all the boxes. he’s great at communicating, always satisfies your needs, is trustworthy and trusts you. the list goes on. immediately knows when you’re off/sad, and just smiles softly as he takes your hand, kissing your knuckles and saying, “let’s go home, yeah?” at home, he makes you some calming tea, probably pulls out some cookies or brownies or biscuits (that HE made but we’re not gonna get into that) and just listens as you talk, whether it’s about why you’re sad or just in general. gives you honest advice, but also a lil biased bc he loves you hehe <3
1K notes · View notes
mysmedrabbles · 5 years
Text
RFA Comforting an MC with Terrible Period Pains
requested: by anonymous 
a/n: oh my god the header is a MOOD for this ask. enJOY and hAVE FUN READING THIS therES SO MUCHCOFFEEINMYSYSTEMHHHHH want to support my period-ic writing ayy see what i did there? then feel free to buy me a coffee!
warnings: aside from that terrible pun you just witnessed? n/a
-AAAAAAAARRRGHHHHHH mod alex
Tumblr media
Jumin
-he finds you clutching your stomach, sweat beading your forehead as you move from uncomfortable position to uncomfortable position, mastering positions he’d figured only Elizabeth the III could do
-worry creases his forehead as he rushes to your side, touching your side gingerly, almost scared that you’ll crumble under his fingers, but all you do is let out a pained groan, unable to speak as the pounding in your head grows louder with each stab through your gut
- “mC aRe YoU dYiNg???” 
-through pained gesturing, he finally understands that you’re not dying, just going through a torture worse than death
-has no idea what to do, just lays down with you, holding your hand and rubbing soothing circles on your back
-as soon as you finally fall asleep, he’s calling the doctor, wanting a professionals opinion on how best to lessen your pain
-poor doctor in his mind is probably like, “you,,,could have looked this up,,, on your phone,, that you used,,, to call me,,,,,,,, at 1 IN THE MORNING”
-he feels awkward, not being able to help you with more than a hot bottle on your stomach and keeping you company, running his hands through your hair and massaging your temples as he sits with you, helping you the only way he knows how, by rambling about the stock market
-at some point you tune out what he’s saying, focusing on his voice and the comforting patterns hes tracing on your skin
-you can bet that he buys you the most expensive german chocolate, anything that you want, anything you crave will be imported right away and be on your front doorstep the next morning
-he most likely has a calendar app on his phone where he keeps approximate track of your cycle so that he’s always prepared to give you extra special attention and care
-when he goes on business trips that last longer than a week, he has a box specifically made, kind of like a care package containing but not limited to:
-the finest chocolate (10 different kinds! with a surplus of your favourite!)
-those emergency hospital crack-and-place heat packets, good to keep on your lower back and uterus 
-oranges and broccoli (though these tend to be in the fridge)
-with a small note on how much he loves you and will see you tonight on call, telling you to take care of yourself and leaving the doctors phone number in case of an emergency 
Jaehee
-she KNOWS the pain,, she K N O W S 
-im not saying that at some point your cycles start happening at the same time, but thats exactly what I’m saying (i have no idea how this happens irl but it does and?? idk its odd)
-so generally the two of you are sitting home together, laying sprawled on the couch, 4 Ibuprofen between the two of you as you watch Zen’s old musicals, watching Jaehee sleepily hum along as she holds you against her chest, stroking your hair and bringing up your hand to her mouth, kissing your knuckles as the two of you fall asleep together 
-she knows you have a harder time than her when your period rolls around, so she has a tendency to insist that you don’t stress yourself out at work, keeping you mostly behind the counter where you’re not carrying hot liquids for too long. 
-helping you out whenever she can, hugging you from behind as you struggle to stand on your feet, giving you momentary support as she takes the cup from your hands, instructing you to sit down
-no one has ever seen her so lenient with someone when it comes to work
-you log onto the server to gush about Jaehee, posting pictures of her running around at work, helping customers, “ThAtS mY wIFe Y’aLL”
-she has a special coffee brew that she only breaks out when you’re in severe pain, added her secret ingredient (which she refuses to tell you about) that somehow make everything better 
-practically begging her to judo kick you in the spine because goddamnit it hurts so bad (she doesn't, opting for a soothing massage instead)
-kisses and cuddles galore, she puts the care in “caring for you,” to the point where she doesn't complain about her own mediocre periods upon seeing just how bad the pain is with you (please take care of her anyways she deserves the best)
Yoosung
-listen,, this boy grew up with sisters and a mother, he’s practically a pro when it comes to helping you out
-the second he sees you rush into the restroom in a panic, he’s already getting the pill bottle and hot bottle out, doing the bed the way you like it and pulling out your favourite blanket and warm stuffed animal 
-insists to take care of you the whole time, and is willing to skip school to stay home with you,, its only after threatening him from the bed, wagging your finger weakly at him does he actually go, however he’s one to send you worrying text messages through the whole day, and silly photos of a leaf he saw or a funny cat meme
-he cooks for you like theres no tomorrow, and is always extremely apologetic when he gets home an hour later than normal due to grocery shopping, only to find you having finally fallen asleep, stuffed animal discarded neatly on the bedside table, hugging his pillow instead
-his eyes soften, heartrate slowing down as he gazes on your sleeping form
-trying his best not to disturb you, he tiptoes out of the room, getting your favourite dinner ready, and trying his best to make something with your preferred chocolate
-you hobble out of the room sleepily, the smell of food drawing you to the kitchen
-he’ll immediately drop everything, running to you as he helps you to a chair, chiding you for getting up and straining yourself when you could have just called for him
-playing video games together lazily, him joking that he should let you win, but this just drives you to beat his ass in mariokart, absolutely demolishing him with no mercy
-he sits there shell shocked as you sit next to him grinning 
Seven 
-he’s versed in over five languages, survived the worst years of his life, is number one in the Shooting Star Server, the best hacker on the planet, and yet he has no preparation on how to help you through periods
-he knows the basics, but seeing you in such pain makes him rethink everything he thought he knew
-he sees you constantly shifting, arching your back in a vain attempt to crack it, crack any bone for momentary relief, and decides this is his time to shine and help you somewhat
-he gives the best back massages, working the pressure points on your lower back, and getting out all the knots in your shoulders, pressing kisses to your shoulder blades as he goes along, fingers working on the entirety of your back.
-shares his Honey Buddha Chips with you, even letting you take three or more bags, as long as you promise to not waste any that is.
-keeps you away from spicy foods, dairy and phD pepper, his technical knowledge had gotten him that far at least, and even though you’re more than happy to eat junk food for a week straight, for the first time ever he insists on eating better, giving you foods such as salmon and oranges,, only after heavy persuasion and multiple times of you threatening him does he let you have chocolate 
-he stays with you the whole time, making sure you’re laughing and taking care of yourself, trying his best to ease the pain with terrible terrible jokes and horrible Saeran impressions
-he knows that you dont like having a heating pad on your stomach because its so weird barely being able to move and having to stay in one place, so he places his laptop on your stomach, letting it overheat on your pelvic area as the two of you play fireboy and watergirl
Zen
-before we start i just wanna say Zen is 100% the type of guy who would hold no disgust or immature “ew thats icky”type attitude to the thought of buying his s/o menstrual products and he looks down on any man that does have that attitude
-he’s not quite versed in how to help you, but he’s a fast learner, and would rather rely on your own reactions to his help and seeing what works for you as opposed to just asking the void that is the internet what is supposed to help
-he’s one to carry you everywhere while you’re on your period, not letting you strain yourself for fear you’ll get off balance, fall and hurt yourself, and he’s constantly referencing you as his prince(ss), even more than usual
-singing you to sleep, letting his melodious voice wash over you as he holds you close, letting his natural body warmth keep you warm
-strokes your hair as you lay down, exhausted from all the pain, your body physically not able to stay awake anymore, practically blacking out
-if you cry, he’ll hold you, massaging your back and whispering soft comforts in your ear, but inside he’s pained by the distress this is causing you, and is mainly frustrated that he can’t do more
-sometimes he wakes up early in the morning to go for a jog or get breakfast for the two of you, and he’ll leave multiple sticky notes with sweet messages, ensuring that he’ll be back soon and to take it easy until he’s back home
-this man with Refuse to let you strain yourself in Any way, and will drop Everything to run over if he sees you so much as bending over to pick up something, practically throwing himself over the dropped item and insisting to pick it up for you
540 notes · View notes
captainillogical · 5 years
Text
Devil’s Ballroom Ch.7
Tumblr media
A year after the events from the earth’s final attack, Little Homeworld is finally complete, and there’s a new jazz bar where gems and humans mingle and drink. - As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now.
Spinel/Reader
collab with my lovely wife @firstofficertightpants​
ya’ll im sorry lmao
You spend the rest of your evening doing exactly none of the errands that you needed to deal with today. Instead, you're laying on your couch and texting your friends.
         Y/N: I'm so tornnnn.
     Y/N: Do I say something about the cheek smooch?
     Y/N: Should I leave it be?
     Y/N: Because she's texting like nothing happened.
     Y/N: What if I'm reading too much into it??
     Y/N: What if that's just how she shows friendship affection???
     Y/N: I might make it so fucking awkward if I assume something!
     Y/N: This entire ordeal is mortifying!!!
     Y/N: I want nothing more than to dig a big hole and lie in it forever.
     Y/N: I might be low-key having a panic attack about this rn but what's new.
     Harper: Y/N. chill. you're way overreacting to this.
     Harper: even if it meant nothing, she still likes you as a friend right?
     Harper: i think it would take a lot for her to like.. not wanna stay friends lol.
     Alex: im just saying you could probably kiss her and she'd be ok with it
     Alex: cheek kisses are pretty forward
     Harper: don't listen to him. all of his relationships ended in failure.
     Alex: wow
     Alex: im seriously hurt
     Harper: am I wrong?
     Alex: no..
     Harper: my point exactly.
     Harper: i’m not saying you have nothing to lose or anything.
     Harper: because i myself had to tread very carefully with leah..
    ��Harper: but i think you should just see where it goes and not like
     Harper: put too much emphasis on this incase it was nothing.
     Y/N: Yeah see now you have me worried it WAS nothing!!
     Alex: oh my goooooooddddddddddddddd
     Alex: the both of you approach women so.. pathetically
     Alex: take a risk
     Alex: live a little
     Alex: what is seriously the worst that could happen
     Alex: she kills you??
     Alex: lmao
     Alex: its funny cuz of.. you know
     Harper: i can’t wait to be home and smothering him with a pillow instead of affection.
     Y/N: You and me both.
     Y/N: Try being the only one available to play games with him.
     Alex: both of you fucking love me okay
     Alex: alsooooooo i get to be home the day after tomorrow
     Alex: the alex is back, babieeeeee
     Y/N: Harper please come home I’m BEGGING you.
     Harper: sorry you gotta deal with him alone for another month lmao.
     Y/N: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
     Alex: can i get a fucking crumb of love here please
         You swipe over to the couple of messages Spinel has left you in the past couple of minutes while you were talking to your friends.
         Spinel: It’s another stupid ball, I just found out.
     Spinel: I told her that I’m sitting this one out this time.
     Spinel: She has so many others that would absolutely love to help her, and yet, still absolutely insists that I must be there.
     Spinel: I don’t want to go back to homeworld right now, and not for this.
     Y/N: And you put your foot down? Hell yeah, dude.
     Y/N: Planning a ball for a bunch of gems sounds like a chore anyway.
     Spinel: oh, it is, believe me.
     Spinel: And they need everything to be PERFECT.
     Spinel: Which isn’t realistic anymore now that they don’t expect any of the gems to stay in line with their gem class nowadays.
     Spinel: The last ball they threw almost 4 months ago was utterly chaotic.
     Y/N: For thousands of years y'all as a race never pushed to deviate from the norm, and now that you guys are allowed to? I’d go batshit with it too.
     Y/N: Being stifled in everyday life, and finally you’re free?
     Y/N: Fuck, I’d go around fusing with anyone!
     Spinel: That is precisely what too many of them did.
     Y/N: Lmao. I wish I could’ve seen that.
         You tab back over to your group chat for a moment to see what they’re talking about.
         Harper: see? they’re everywhere.
     Harper: i wasn’t expecting the campsite to have so many.
     Alex: you could have built an army and instead you took pictures
     Alex: do you know how easy it is to lure chipmunks?
     Alex: oh that lil guy on the bottom right is so fucking chunky i love him
     Harper: that’s the one that got the closest when i fed them. :3
     Alex: oh i fuckin BET
     Alex: you dont get that chubby in the wild without takin a few risks
     Alex: if u know what i mean ;)
     Harper: i hate whatever you just implied.
     Y/N: It’s not a conversation with Alex unless you roll your eyes at least 3 times.
     Alex: hey i thought it was 4 times
     Alex: dont insult me
     Alex: anyway, y/n
     Alex: are you workin the day i come back
     Y/N: Yeah I’m actually scheduled a double.
     Alex: scheduled
     Y/N: Yes.
     Alex: a double
     Y/N: Yes.
     Alex: he can’t SCHEDULE you a DOUBLE
     Y/N: He can if he asks me ahead of time as a favor.
     Alex: that fuckin bastard
     Alex: always ruining my plans
     Harper: you’re still mad at him for firing you last summer, huh.
     Alex: OF COURSE I AM
     Y/N: Bro you stole like $300 of cotton candy sugar that summer.
     Y/N: It’s only fair.
     Y/N: Besides, I’m only doing this because he said he’d give me a long weekend for it.
     Alex: kay well
     Alex: i guess i’ll just go bug you at work and wait for you to get off that day :'(
     Y/N: Get me written up again, I swear to god.
         Your phone chimes several times, and you swipe down to see messages from both Spinel and Steven. You check Spinel's first.
         Spinel: Do me a favor and ignore any messages Steven has sent you.
     Y/N: What are you, my boss?
     Spinel: I MEAN IT
         You quickly switch over to Steven's texts.
         Steven: I was going to ask you if your date with Spinel went okay, but I'm assuming it went fine considering she hasn't really stopped talking about you.
         Ohhhh my god, this is wild. You reply to him.
         Y/N: It wasn't a date as far as I know.
     Y/N: I had fun.
     Y/N: She's telling me to not read your messages, lmao.
     Y/N: Also what do you mean she hasn't stopped talking about me??
     Steven: She’s been lying on my floor for the last hour basically gushing about you.
     Steven: But you didn’t hear that from me!
     Steven: :D
     Y/N: Haha thanks, kid.
         You switch back over to text Spinel, and get up off the couch to make yourself some tea. Pulling out your kettle, you turn the stove on and grab some raspberry flavored abomination tea bag that your dad loves more than any of the other good tea flavors.
         Y/N: Sooooo.
     Spinel: You talked to him, didn’t you.
     Y/N: Hahaha noooo. :)
     Spinel: The fuck did he say?
     Y/N: Absolutely nothing.
     Spinel: Seriously? I was sure he’d reveal something embarrassing.
     Y/N: Nope! You should probably get off his floor eventually, though.
         Your kettle goes off and you grab a clean mug, and pour the boiling water into it along with the tea packet. You look down at your phone, and grin.
         Spinel: goddammit.
         You let the bag steep for a little bit, and add in a small amount of sugar. Walking up to your bedroom you take a snap of Jellybean half lounging, half falling off the stairs and send it to Spinel. She replies with a couple heart emojis, and you wonder if Steven was the one to show her the proper use of them. You set your cup of tea down on your desk, and turn your computer on. It’s evening now, and it’s much too late to do anything left with the rest of your day productivity-wise, so you settle in on playing more minecraft. Your thoughts wander quite a bit, and you find yourself stuck on thinking about Spinel. Naturally. You wonder about a lot of things she’s learned while staying on earth, from things like - does she pay rent? Does she have a job? Does she know what taxes are? Does she know what a relationship with a human looks like? She said she watched a movie, but didn’t exactly elaborate. You don’t know what human-norms she’s been exposed to. You can’t even concentrate enough to mine any of this redstone for Alex, and you nearly die in-game when the thought of ‘does she know what sex is?’ pops into your mind. You grab your phone and shoot Spinel another message.
         Y/N: Quick question.
     Y/N: If you don’t mind me asking.
         It takes her a few minutes to reply.
         Spinel: Sure?
     Y/N: Do you know how humans are made?
     Spinel: w
     Spinel: Yes?
     Spinel: Steven told me about it a few weeks ago actually.
     Spinel: Why are you asking?
     Y/N: No reason! Just curious is all.
     Spinel: Hm.
         Yeah you’re not too confident that she actually knows, and you’re too chickenshit to elaborate right now. You’ll enlighten her later. You spend the rest of the night browsing memes on your phone, and texting your friends and Spinel on occasion. Before you know it, your eyes drift close with your phone in hand.
     You wake up when your alarm goes off for your morning shift, and curse at yourself for not charging it last night. It’s at a solid 32%, which isn’t really enough to go about your day, but you’ll have to make do. You get ready for a hopefully not shitty day, lock up the house, and head in to work.
     It’s a complete shitshow when you come in, and you turn your phone off to save battery and concentrate on dealing with more than an average amount of tourists. You find Mr. Smiley sleeping in the breakroom/office/supply closet, and have half a mind to lock him in there from the outside for the rest of your shift. It’s pretty busy, and messy, and it isn’t until you’re there for several exhausting hours that you finally have enough time for a break. You turn your phone on, and instantly you’re flooded with messages from several different people. Ugh.
           A couple from your dad - just checking in, really. Group chat too as usual, but none of it seems overly important. One from Spinel, and several from Steven. You open up Spinel’s message first.
         Spinel: Do you think we could talk about a couple of things later?
         Vague, and a little concerning. You text back an apology for getting back to her so late, and open the messages from Steven.
         Steven: Hey are you busy?
     Steven: I’m dealing with a bit of a situation right now, and could use your help.
     Steven: Spinel locked herself in my bathroom, and she won’t come out.
     Steven: She refuses to answer to anyone, and several of us have tried.
     Steven: I’m just really worried about her, and you guys seemed to bond, so I was hoping..
     Steven: That maybe you could come over?
     Steven: Thanks regardless.
         You check the timestamp, and that was over an hour ago. Jesus christ.
         Y/N: Steven I’m so sorry, my phone was off and I’m at work, give me a few and I’ll be right over, okay?
     Y/N: I’ll be quick.
         He replies almost immediately with a “please” and you pocket your phone. You try not to worry too hard about Spinel as you rush over to grab your things, and knock on Mr. Smiley’s office/broom closet door. He opens it groggily, clearly just waking up.
     “Yeah?” he slowly blinks at you.
     “I gotta leave early. Emergency.” You stare at him, trying to not be pissed at his lack of work ethic.
     “Are you for real? You’ve got another 3 hours left.” He says and crosses his arms, and you glare at him.
     “I’ve been working my ass off while you’ve been sleeping this whole time, AND I’m covering your ass tomorrow so you can go meet your old friend! So the LEAST you can do is let me go early when I have an emergency!!!” You almost yell out at him, and he holds his hands up in defense.
     “Okay, okay! Fine. Only because you’re a good worker.” He says, and has the gall to look at least a little ashamed of himself.
     “Damn right I am.” You spin around and head out of the building, practically running.
     You almost trip and bite it several times on the way over to Steven’s place, but you’re more worried about Spinel. You’ve only been to his place twice, but once you’re there you run up the stairs and open the door without knocking. You’re greeted by the only two people in the living room, Pearl, and Steven.
         “Oh, she’s here!” Pearl says and nudges Steven, who looks up from typing on his phone.
     “Y/N! Thank god you’re here.” He says with furrowed eyebrows.
     “What happened?” You say and shut the door, and cross the room over to him.
     “I’m not sure! We were just working on something together for Amethyst, and she got a call from Blue and Yellow. She’s been ignoring them lately, and they’ve been bothering me in turn because of that, so I asked her to take the call just see what they want.” He runs his hand through his brown curls, and just for a moment, you see that 12 year old him in again. The obvious stress masks just how young he really is, and you feel bad that he can’t live life like a normal kid. “She went outside to take the call, and was out there for quite a while. I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop, but I did hear some yelling. And just when I was going over to make sure they were alright, she comes back in tears, eyes spiraling like months ago, and nearly knocks Pearl over rushing into the bathroom.”
     “And nothing since?” You inquire, fidgeting with your hands.
     “No,” He says, frustratedly. “I’ve been trying to reach the diamonds to see what this is all about, but I’ve only been getting the pearls. I don’t know what to do. She hasn’t been like this in months. What were they talking about to make her this upset?”
     “Maybe I can find out. You said she’s in your bathroom?” You raise an eyebrow at him.
     “Yeah, the one right over here.” He says and points to it.
     “Is it locked?” You ask.
     “No,” Pearl glances towards the bathroom door and crosses her arms. “The lock has been broken on it for a while, since Peridot joined us actually. Both Garnet and I tried opening it, but I think once Spinel hears someone trying to come in she blocks the door.”
     Hm.
     “I’m gonna try something, but you guys are gonna wanna stay away.” You say to the two of them. “I don’t want to overwhelm her with more than one person.”
     “Let us know if we can do anything?” Steven makes to pass by you and gives your arm a light squeeze. “And thanks for coming to help.”
     “Anytime, dude.” You give him a half smile, and walk over to his bathroom. You turn to take a look back at the other two, and they’re already in the kitchen discussing something in soft tones. You move to knock at the door, make two light taps against the frame, and wait for an answer.
     A couple seconds pass, and nothing. Not even any movement. Nervously, you knock again, a little louder this time, and wait for a good ten seconds.
     Still nothing.
     You take a deep breath, reach out to grab the door handle, and very slowly and quietly open the bathroom door. You see nothing but absolute darkness, and step in. You feel around the wall to your right and flip a switch just as you close the door behind you with an audible click. The room instantly floods with the dark red light of the heat lamp, and before you can even think about finding another light source, you find yourself slammed up against the wall and let out a surprised yelp. You open your eyes to see Spinel’s face inches from yours, pupils wild, her hands splayed against your shoulders.
     “U-um,” Your voice cracks a little. “Hey.”
     You watch her eyes take a second to find yours, and almost instantly, she lets you go, arms trembling.
     “W.. what are YOU DOING HERE!?” She cries, large tears pouring down her face, eyebrows raised in confusion, mouth trembling. Her hair is in loose pigtails, strands untamed around her face, cheeks stained with tear tracks. She looks like a mess, and your heart breaks, just a little. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt y-”
     “I’m fine.” You cut her off. “I should have said who it was outside the door, I’m sorry. And um.. Steven texted me while I was at work, and told me what was going on so I rushed over..” You trail off as you watch Spinel’s entire body shake, and she covers her face with both of her hands.
     “I can’t believe I just did that.” You hear her wavering voice, muffled behind her fists, and she lets out a choked sob. “Maybe they were right. M-maybe I’m not meant to-” She quickly moves her hands down to look at the floor with wide, vulnerable eyes, and struggles to form the rest of her words. You hear her breathing pick up pace, and you’re starting to realize she’s hyperventilating.
     “Spinel, look at me.” Her eyes shoot up to yours, lips trembling. “I need you to breathe.” You do what your friends have always done with you, and gently grab both of her hands and hold them with yours, thumbs stroking her palms in slow circles. She freezes up instantly, and you’re about to panic, because while a familiar touch helps ground you, you register that maybe it’ll make it worse for her. But before you can pull your hands away, her hands relax ever so slightly, and she lets out a shaky breath. “Good. Just like that.” You motion for her to follow your breathing inverals, and she copies you, hands still shaking in yours.
     It’s been a while since you’ve had to deal with something like this, but you’re thankful for having similar life experiences. After a solid minute or two of this her breathing is back to a normal pace, but she’s still crying, and now not meeting your eyes. Almost like she’s avoiding them.
     “Look, I.. I don’t know what happened with you and the diamonds, but you can talk to me about it if you’d like. No pressure, though.” You give her hands a small squeeze, and she whimpers, looking up to meet your gaze. Tears are still actively streaming down her face, and you have no idea how to make any of this better. It physically hurts you to see her like this.
     “C-can I not talk about it? I don’t think I’m ready..” She pulls a hand from yours, and wipes at her face. She just kind of smeared half of her face with wetness, and she looks miserable.
     “You don’t have to talk about anything, Spinel.” You look at her, making sure she sees it in your eyes. You slowly let go of her other hand, and hold your arms out in a silent question instead. Her mouth opens slightly, the red glow of the light around her making her look extremely vulnerable and soft, and she looks at your open arms with a blank face for a moment before understanding. Almost instantaneously, she throws herself against you and wraps her arms around your shoulders, shoving her face into the cradle of your neck. You envelop your arms around her tightly, giving her sides a squeeze, and you feel her start to shake again.
     She lets out an unsteady sigh, and hiccups out another small sob. You pull her to lean fully against you as you stand there, bracing your back against the bathroom door. She lets you maneuver her, and you rest the side of your face against her temple while she cries. You resign yourself to letting her cry on you until she’s done, if she needs to.
       You feel her sniffle against your neck, and try not to mind that she’s getting your shirt soaked. You give her back a few gentle rubs, feeling her body quiver against yours as she’s trying to control her choked breathing. You’re not really counting the minutes, as right now you’re currently having way too many rampant thoughts about what the fuck the diamonds could’ve said to her. You’re mad as hell, honestly, and if you could say shit to them, you would in a heartbeat. You don’t want to make anything worse for her though, as much as you want to steal her phone and video call them to curse them out. It takes a few more minutes, but eventually her crying dies down, and you feel her breathing even out. Slowly, she dislodges her arms from twisting around you two, and you feel a sigh, her breath hot against your neck. You do your best to school your facial expression as you’re realize just how close you are to her, and she pulls her face from its resting position to look at you. She looks awful.
       “U-um,” She lifts up her hand to attempt to wipe her face, failing to rub half the tears away. “I don’t really want to go out there yet..”
       “You don’t have to.” You say, quietly. “I can leave if you’d like some quiet to yourself.” Her face looks panicked for a second, and she grabs your wrist.
       “Please don’t leave me.” She says, voice wavering again. You try not to let your heart shatter at her tone.
     “I won’t if you want me here.” You say, and sigh softly. “Here, hold on a second.”
     She lets your wrist go as you move slightly over to the sink, turn the hot water on, and grab a clean hand towel from the counter. You soak it in water, and squeeze out all the excess. Towel in hand, you turn back to her, and she’s looking at you cautiously. You lift the towel slightly, motioning to her face.
     “May I?” You ask, and she nods slightly.
     Tenderly, you brush a couple strands of hair away from her face, grasp her chin with your left hand and pull her forward, gently pressing the towel to her cheek. She closes her eyes, and her shoulders sag a little as she lets you dab at her face, cleaning her of any tear stain marks. She sighs into your touch, and it strikes you that it would be so easy to just.. lean in and kiss her.
       Your brain almost short circuits and you snap your thoughts back to reality. There’s a time and place for everything. This is not the time, nor the place.
       Once you’re satisfied that she looks a lot better than before, you pull your hands away to toss the rag in the sink, and Spinel, for a brief moment, looks disappointed that you had stopped. Which.. kind of gives you an idea.
       “Can I try something? Harper used to do this thing with me when I.. had similar breakdowns.” You ask her. She raises her eyebrow in response, clearly exhausted from crying so much. “Here.” You say, and take her hand and lead her over to the rim of the bathtub. You sit down on the edge, and motion for her to sit in front of you on the floor. She takes a seat in front of you, still confused, but obeys nonetheless. “Can I touch you?” You ask her, watching her face to make sure she’s alright.
       She looks up at you, the red light in the room flooding the entirety of her face, making her hair darker, and the whites of her eyes a bit more dramatic.
     “Yeah.” She says in reply, voice tired.
     You reach out to her hair, and stop for a moment.
     “Can I have you face the other direction, actually? Come over here.” You move to open your knees, making enough room for Spinel to turn around and lean against the bathtub. She’s close to you again.
     “What are you..” She trails off as you start to take the hair ties out of her pigtails, one after the other. It takes a second, as it’s a bit tangled, but you manage to get both out, and let her hair fall down. You comb out her hair with your fingers, gently, and she sighs audibly while leaning into your touch. You run your short nails along her scalp, scratching and massaging as you smooth out her hair, attempting to pull all the tangles out.
     “Touch used to calm me down, and Harper was really good at it, honestly.” You say while pulling out a particularly difficult tangle without hurting her. Her hair is long like this, and you like it. You wish you could grow your hair this long, but it’s kind of a pain to deal with, and the longest you’ve ever had yours wasn’t even to your mid back, you think to yourself. “Sometimes she’d give me shoulder and neck massages, but I preferred that she’d just play with my hair. There’s just something different about another person touching your hair.”
     “I kind of get what you mean.” She says, tiredly.
     “Can I braid your hair?” You lean closer to look at her face.
     “Do what you want.” She says, looking fairly relaxed.
     “Cool. Anyway, while Harper was good at that, Alex, on the other hand, was just terrible at any kind of physical comfort. He’s genuine, and he tries, but he’s an idiot. He’s a lot better at distractions, for the most part.” You run your fingers through her hair one more time, before starting to separate her hair into three parts for a french braid. “He’s funny, and comes from a large family, so he always has stories and jokes. Whenever I’d have a panic attack, those two were always so good about being there for me. I don’t know what I’d do without them.”
     You notice that Spinel‘s shoulders have lost most of the tension in them, and you’re secretly relieved. You keep talking to fill the quietness around you two, because you’ve always hated the quiet during moments like these. Your friends aren’t here, so it’s up to you to make up for it.
     “It was kind of hard, at first though,” You say, and start looping the chunks of hair around your fingers, starting at the top of her head. “Because for a while there, back when I was 16 and dealing with the worst of my abandonment issues, I clung onto Harper like a baby koala. I had this super weird crush on her even though we had been friends since we were practically babies. I think I idolized her because she was just.. good to me.” You accidentally tug a little too hard on a strand of hair, wince and utter an apology while massaging the spot on her scalp. “I’m glad that didn’t ruin our friendship, but for a while there I really pushed my feelings onto her, which was kinda fucked up on my part.”
     “Hm..” Spinel mumbles. “I kind of had a thing for Pink, I think. Which ended up screwing with me even more after what she did.” You stare at the back of her head and pause your hands for a second. Huh. Yeah, you had a hunch.
     “If she were still alive, I’d punch her in the face for you, I hope you know.” You state, in full seriousness. This gets the first chuckle that you’ve heard from her today, and you’re secretly overjoyed.
     “I’d pay to watch that.” She says, and you laugh out loud. You see her smile, just barely.
     “So,” You continue, with both your hands and conversation. “A week or so after my 17th birthday, right after Harper talked to me about this guy at school that she liked, I confess to her. And not like a, ‘oh hey, you’re my best friend and I really like you’ kind of way, either. It was more like a, ‘have a mental breakdown over your best friend liking someone else and make them feel like shit about it on your walk home from school’ kind of confession.” Your hands reach the nape of her neck now, braid mostly done on her head, but you’ve got around another 20 inches of length before being finished.
     “Harper avoided me for nearly a week after that. I was absolutely pathetic, and inconsolable. Alex was fed up with my shit after a few days, and nearly slapped me over it. He would’ve been in the right, doing so, honestly. I was a selfish asshole who only thought about her own feelings, and not about her best friends.” Your eyes drift to Spinel’s face, and her eyes are closed, eyebrows unfurrowed.
     “Anyway,” You’re nearly done with the entire braid now. “She did end up forgiving me. Thankfully. I don’t know what I’d do if it were my fault that I’d split up our friend group.” You pick up the discarded hair tie from earlier, and tie it around the end of the braid.
     “I’m all done, by the way.” You say to her. She opens her eyes tentatively, and she looks sleepy. You stand up, and stretch your back. She also gets up on wobbly legs, and turns to look at you.
     “Um.” She’s avoiding your eyes. “Thank you. For this.” She’s twisting her hands together, nervously. You lean your face closer to get at eye-level with her.
     “Anytime.. and for the record, you look really cute in a braid.” You say and smile, giving her a cheeky wink. You watch her entire face from the neck up turn bright red, and think that you could probably do this forever, and never get tired. She gives you a noncommittal grunt, halfheartedly smacks your arm and you grin at her.
     You hear a quiet knock at the door, and look over to Spinel. She shrugs, so I guess it’s okay now.
     “You can come in!” You say to the door. It opens slowly, and you see Steven peek his head in.
     “Um.. are we okay?” He asks, clearly very worried about her.
     “I’ll be okay.” She says, and you think that maybe she should lay down and sleep. You verbalize this immediately.
     “Spinel. I think you should go take a nap.” You look at her, and she blinks at you. “I’m serious.”
     “She’s kind of right.” Steven says in agreement with you. Spinel gives the both of you a shrug, and even that seems like it’s taking a lot out of her.
     “Okay.” She says, and turns to walk out of the bathroom. Steven opens the door wider, and you can see Pearl in the kitchen leaning against the counter, trying to not seem like she’s intently watching all of you.
     Spinel makes her way over to the couch and takes a seat, sitting up rigidly. You walk over to her to make sure she’s okay before you leave for home.
     “You know you can text me, right? And if you need me, I’ll be available. I’ll leave my volume turned on.” She gives you a nod. “Oh, and.. take this,” You say, and pull off the pullover hoodie you’re wearing right now, and hand it over to her. “Alex used to let me wear his oversized sweaters, and they used to help me sleep, so..”
     She tentatively reaches out, and takes it from your hands.
     “Thanks.” She says, and gives you a small smile. With her hair pulled back like this she almost looks human, for a fleeting moment. You sometimes forget she’s a gem. You return the smile back at her, and turn around to leave.
     After grabbing your bag that you set down earlier from beside the couch, you head over to the front door and open it. Shouldering the bag, you start to shut the door and see Steven behind you. He closes the door behind him, his face searching yours for something you don’t quite know.
     “I don’t know what you did, but thank you.” He says, completely genuine.
     “You don’t have to thank me. I’d do it for you, too, you know.” You say to him, and he smiles.
     “That’s why I like you, Y/N. You’re sweet.”
     “Yeahhhh, don’t tell anyone, though. You’ll ruin my reputation.” You smirk, giving him the side-eye. He laughs and pats your back.
     “Ohhhhhh no! Whatever will you do!?” He rolls his eyes in jest. “Get home safe, okay?”
     “No promises.” You reply, and jump down his steps, two at a time.  
     It doesn’t take you long to get home, and you’re pretty tired yourself. You make yourself busy by preparing dinner, cleaning the kitchen a little, and calling your dad for another check-in. Before you know it, it’s nearly 11, and you need to sleep for your double shift tomorrow that you almost forgot about. You’re laying in bed browsing social media before drifting off, and you receive a text from Spinel. You swipe down and open the message.
         Spinel: Thanks again for today.
     Spinel: I baked some new cookies with Steven, and would like to give you some tomorrow if that’s okay?
         You smile to yourself. Ughhhhhhhh, you’re catching the feelings disease, and you swat the air around you like it somehow physically manifested around you.
         Y/N: I work literally all day, but feel free to stop by and give them to me.
     Y/N: Then I get to see a pretty familiar face to break up all the lame tourists.
     Y/N: Cuz that sounds super nice. ;)
     Spinel: I’ll see you tomorrow, then.
         She didn’t react to your obvious teasing, but you won’t let that discourage you. You fall asleep thinking of the many different ways you can poke fun at her, and this time, you charge your phone.
     You wake up the next morning feeling well-rested for once, and get ready for work. Alex has sent you a couple texts about when his flight will arrive, and when he’ll roughly come to meet you. Sometime around 4pm, apparently. You shoot Spinel a good morning text, and she replies almost instantly with the same, which makes you smile.
     You head to work, texting your group chat about what happened yesterday with Spinel, and give them basically all the details. Alex makes fun of you for a bit, so you curse him out and pocket your phone as you clock in. Today’s going to suck, but you’ve got a few things to look forward to.
     You make it a couple hours into your shift before you finally get a break, and Spinel texts you that she’ll drop by sometime in the afternoon once she’s done helping Bismuth with something. God you hope it’s not when Alex gets here, because you are so not fucking ready for that interaction. You eat your lunch and pray to any god out there that you could have one more day of peace.
     You’re outside the main building repairing a couple parts on the carousel, ignoring the bulk of the tourists to focus on work. You don’t realize that quite a while has passed by, because someone walks up to you as you’ve got your head in a small door, and kicks you slightly on your ass. You jolt and bump your head against the opening, and you hear Alex burst out into laughter as you groan in pain.
     God fucking dammit, this guy. You pull your head out to glare at him, screwdriver pointing at him threateningly.
     “Do you want this up your ass? Because I can do that.” You say to him, and he laughs even harder. You roll your eyes at him.
     “Don’t promise me with a good time, Y/N.” He says, and you stand up to smack him.
     “I don’t think the pointy end would be a good time, idiot.” You deadpan stare at him. He grins.
     “You don’t know what I’m into.” He shrugs, and flips his hair dramatically. You hate that he’s stupid and charming, and you love him so much.
     “I know I haven’t seen you in 2 months, but like, I feel like you’ve grown taller?” You stare at him, a little mournfully. You’re the shortest one out of your friends, and you’re of average height. He also seems.. handsomer. You think he definitely got a lot more tan. He’s definitely grown into his looks, his dark curly hair and recently shaved face making him look older than you’re used to.
     “I don’t think I did, but I think you’ve grown shorter.” He laughs obnoxiously, and you smack his arm again, which makes him laugh harder.
     “You’re so mean to me, like all the time. Why do I love you?” You cross your arms and pout, because you know it gets a rise out of him.
     “Youuuuuuu knowww, because I’m just so loveable and gorgeous and the smartest one in the group??” He flutters his eyelashes at you like he thinks he’s cute.
     “Wow, you are none of these things.” You reply, smirking at him. He puts his hand over his heart in mock offense.
     “Y/N, I’m offended. I’ve been here for like, five minutes, and I’ve received absolutely no affection from you. If I don’t get love, I will wilt and die. Do you want to be responsible for my death?” He opens his arms wide, and you roll your eyes dramatically, and stand there.
     “We’re not doing this in public.” You say, standing your ground.
     “Ohhh, YES we are, Y/N.” He wiggles his eyebrows. “Prepare yourself for the onslaught.”
     You take a couple steps back, prepared to run. He grabs your arms, wraps his around your torso, and picks you up, swinging you around.
     “Nooooooooooooooooo!!” You cry. “Put me down you oaf!”
     “No! I want love!” He all but shouts, and spins you around. He grabs your cheek with one hand and starts giving you big ‘ol smooches all over your face, and you’re giggling and trying to push him away, when you hear something drop and spill on the pavement a good twenty feet from you. You look up.
     It’s Spinel.
       Her face is twisted with heartbreak, and before you can even speak up, she bolts.
       You look down, and see the cookies she made you scattered on the ground.
132 notes · View notes
jackalopey · 4 years
Text
i am literally so bored rn so im gonna do An Entire Ask Meme for melyn
if your character switched factions, how would they react to having to fight an old friend/ally from their original faction?
awfully bold of you to assume anyone can make melyn do anything. she often befriends strangers from the opposing faction instead of fighting them; if she met an old friend on the battlefield she would be fine with it. she’d either talk them down, or if that wasn’t possible fight them and leave them unconscious / otherwise incapacitated. she wouldn’t take it personally and would expect them not to, either.
if your character could romance anyone, regardless of class or npc status, who would they have romanced?
*gestures to lana* shes already got the wife. genuinely dont think theres anyone else she’d be interested in. we really lucked out there (unlike poor quizzi, destined to never smooch ashara in-game)
do they regret any choices they’ve made in the past?
yes :) in my legacy, lyn sacrifices vette to save torian and that Haunts her. she does it bc she insisted on not taking lana’s advice & keeping the mandalorians safe. she realised that torian had a chance of being the next mandalore, or at least being influential amongst the mandalorians, so keeping him alive was strategically the right move. that choice was influenced by valkorion, and she considers her judgement to have been clouded. she often wonders if she could have done something different and saved them both.
are there any choices they wish they could’ve made?
redeeming vaylin, 100%. lyns big thing is choice - she strongly believes in the importance of personal choice, so the fact that vaylin never truly gained self-determination feels like a personal failing to her. she also wishes she could have saved more of the children of the emperor, for similar reasons, though as she was younger & less experienced back then she tries not to beat herself up for it.
if they switched sides (dark side to light, light to dark), how much would change about them?
i honestly have no idea. so much about who she is is a product of her jedi upbringing; if she hadnt been raised by the jedi i have no idea how different she’d been. if she just fell though she’d probably still be like herself - just carrying that righteous anger harder. but she wouldn’t fall, because she embraces the complexity of the force. i think to truly fall there has to be some degree of fear of the dark, or at least an awareness of ‘dark = bad’ somewhere in you. idk, its complicated & i have complicated feelings about it.
did they name their ship, or is it just referred to as “the ship”?
i think the consular’s callsign is the guardian and she’d probably call it that, or something else similar to that.
if they were a companion, what class would they be for and how would their missions go?
hmm. excluding the consular dsfhjsf i could see her as a companion for any class tbh, but i’d probably go with the knight, with her conversations revolving around the concept of self-determination & forgiveness.
if time travel existed and they were thrown into the prequel/original/sequel trilogy, how would they react?
im doing an rp like this actually fsdghfdsh but she’d primarily be curious about seeing how things from her time went down, and what people of the future remember of her and those she knew. she’d also end up being fascinated by the way people distort and misremember history.
have their light side/dark side actions changed over time? (i.e., a sith warrior who starts out light but ends up dark, etc.)
not so much? i guess she’s started to make some darker choices when those she cares about are in danger, but generally speaking she’s still very light.
are there any choices they wouldn’t have taken, knowing the eventual outcome?
not really? i dont think so at least. most of her regrets are more personal.
if they were the opposite class, what would change about them? (a sith warrior becoming a jedi knight, smuggler to bounty hunter, etc.)
im doing a play like this! i am... still on korriban fdsghdsfhsdf but imagine the most light-sided inquisitor you can get. that’d be her. she’d probably say ‘sorry’ to the ghosts.
do they wish they were/weren’t force sensitive?
nope! her force sensitivity is a big part of who she is - she wouldn’t be her without it!
does their past/background effect how they react to things?
yeah, she’s hugely influence by the sacking of coruscant in particular. this was what inspired her to become a healer! she’s also hugely influenced by yuon parr’s sickness- this is what caused her to become so fixated on the concept of self-determination.
do they consider themselves a hero?
yes, but not in a conceited way. she knows that she fits the definition of a hero. she won’t brag about it, though - she thinks that jedi are supposed to be heroes. it’s their job, to be heroes so others don’t have to.
if they weren’t “the” imperial agent/etc., who would they be? how would they react to the decisions the person in their place is making? (i.e., an agent who is not cipher nine, a smuggler who is not the voidhound.)
‘damn, that sounds rough. anyway, im going to go meditate under a fountain for a week.’
1 note · View note
Text
Tumblr media
RE: My post earlier about the Ooblets Epic Games Exclusive backlash.
I’m not going to show the Twitter user, if you follow the indie game development scene on Twitter it’s likely you’ll recognize this tweet, either way that’s not who I am. The Ooblet’s account on the other hand is fair-game since it’s basically a product placement.
I feel it needs reiterating how utterly dense this kind of tweet is, and how completely skewed the narrative for this issue has gotten, so let me reiterate in obnoxiously large and emboldened font to try and get the point across:
THE GAMING COMMUNITY IS NOT TOXIC
“Honesty” and “transparency” are all well and good, but unless you’re honestly trying to drive away your own community, perhaps you should try being a little less honest and a little less transparent. No one (or I guess no one but this guy and the few who agree with him) is going to thank you for honestly throwing them under the proverbial bus after they’ve spent months, if not years, supporting your project; your dream.
I’ve heard from others that “this is just how they write” and “it’s meant to be funny”, and to an extent, I can understand that. But let me just include some screenshots from the post in question to reiterate my point, because I feel like my previous post didn’t quite get the point across:
Tumblr media
(Context: What the Epic Games Exclusivity Deal means for you, the fan and/or financial backer of Ooblets).
I get that the Fortnite bit is the joke, ha ha, Fortnite used to be wildly popular, I get it, good meme. What isn’t the joke, and what was part of why people got upset was the first bit, specifically the “download the Epic Games Launcher and make an Epic Games account” bit, that bit.
Now, I personally have no qualms about having the Epic Games Launcher on my PC. I have long since looked beyond the ‘scandal’ of tech companies saving and selling my data to distant lands to be used for nefarious moneymaking schemes. Is it bad? Sure, maybe. Would I prevent it had I the chance? Of course. Do I have that chance? Not a chance in the world, so I decide to live with it.
That said, many others have not reached that point of fuck it, and understandably so. I hit that point because of my negative outlook on society as a whole but, praise be, there are in fact still some optimists out there who look at these shitty corporate tactics and say no to them, and good on them for that.
That is what I would say is the bulk of the primary issues people have with the Epic Games Store. The missing features bits aren’t terribly important, as even this post says, if you have a social life on Steam, then use Steam. The EGS does not need to be your do-all replacement.
Tumblr media
This is where the post should have stopped. Here and now, had this post ended, any and all issues with this decision would have been but a whisper in the wind. As I said in my previous post, yes they undoubtedly would have received plenty of critical, and non-critical backlash for the decision regardless, but ending the post here would’ve 100% put the developers on the right side in this situation and I’d be right up there agreeing with that tweet.
Tumblr media
(Context: Are you angry at Epic and/or us for this decision?)
Referring to earlier when I said that playful tone and humour are all fine and dandy, I understand that this is probably meant to sound playful and humourous, but it comes across as largely self-important and ignorant, and the bits that follow do in no way dissuade from that appearance.
Tumblr media
While my response to this complaint was similar to their own, in that you should just use Steam for the features that the Epic Games Store lacks, they go on to essentially say that this is just baby EGS and that Steam used to be just like it and look at it now.
While they aren’t technically wrong, from a development point of view, the big thing they need to understand is how web standards have dramatically changed since 2003 when the Steam store launched. Launching a store, of any variety, without a shopping cart is a big no-no.
As far as missing features go, that’s not like missing a friends list or a IM feature, that’s missing a crucial part of a web-based storefront. Imagine going to a store and only be allowed to purchase one thing at a time, that would be ridiculous.
Tumblr media
Their response to this was as corporate as any triple-A publisher, or really any corporation at all, from any industry. Just a complete disconnect from society that frankly is unwarranted from what is quite literally a two person operation. Not to mention, their response is quite literally what every parent warns their kids about at a young age. “But mooooooooooooom, everyone is doing it!!!!” Yes sweetie, but if everyone jumps off a bridge, are you going to?
Apparently, yes.
And not to discount the idea of making money, by all means make money, but let me put it this way, had they left this post exactly where I said they should have previously, all of the blame would be at Epic’s feet. Because at the end of the day, having your game be exclusive to one service does not make you money, it makes them money. So this whole “everyone is doing it” schtick doesn’t fly when coming from the developers. Had this been a post by Epic (and frankly with all the shilling I could be convinced it was from them) then this argument might have made just a tiny bit more sense.
Tumblr media
Underlined in yellow are the jokes; the “playful” and “humourous” attitude I’ve heard so much about. Underlined in red however, are what the developers are actually genuinely saying with complete and utter seriousness.
“There are worse things in the world to be upset about.” I kid you not, that’s their argument.
Now, all of that reiterated, to get to the actual point of this post (wish Tumblr let you do multiple “Keep Reading” lines but I digress), the article linked in the tweet here is about the previous “non-critical” backlash I mentioned they’d receive, though multiplied exponentially by their horrendous blog post, and further community responses to said blog post.
I’d like to refer to a completely unrelated post I made quite a while ago that really needs to spread like wildfire if you ask me:
RECEIVING INSULTS, UNCRITICAL FEEDBACK, AND/OR DEATH THREATS DOES NOT INVALIDATE THE CRITICAL FEEDBACK NOR THE ISSUE AT HAND.
I am by no means wiping away death threats or mean words as things to scoff at, by all means take them as seriously as you will, but under no circumstances should 20+ people telling you to kill yourself invalidate the hundreds of fans and financial backers who are upset with your recent financial decision, or your response to criticisms to those decisions.
This happens time and time and time again. Someone of note does something bad, for one reason or another, and instead of responding to the completely warranted and justified criticism and feedback they instead play up the 15+ people who IM’d them to drink bleach and throw it up as “an example of the ever present toxic gaming community”.
More or less, the substance to this article is their “apology”, and I use that term very loosely but I’ll get to that, to the community at large for the recent events. The post summarizes the issue from their (biased) perspective, posts some screenshots of the colourful responses they’ve received, the usual woe-is-me schtick.
I’d like to highlight a few bits from it to further exemplify the continued mindset of these people:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I have given the full context to this next statement with these screenshots so that I can now take parts of these statements out of their context to, at least to my belief, succinctly identify the mindset of these folks:
“I understand the relationship people think they might be owed when they exchanged money for goods or services, but...we’ve never actually sold them anything and don’t owe them anything at all.”
I don’t want to get off-topic any more than necessary, but this, this right here is why fundraisers, Kickstarters, GoFundMes, Patreon subscriptions, or any other form of crowdsourcing platforms need to be handled with extreme care. I hesitate to say regulated legally, but I am by no means opposed to that idea.
I want to express this carefully and plainly: LEGALLY, yes they are absolutely right that they do not owe anyone anything. At least to my knowledge, they didn’t have a formal Kickstarter, their financial backing came primarily from whatever it is they do for a living AND the support of their Patreon backers.
And while I do not feel that it needs addressing, for the sake of consistency I will address it: MORALLY they owe the game to anyone who financially supported them with the express purpose of developing the game.
Tumblr media
“We definitely owe all of you who supported us, but also fuck off you entitled cunts because we don’t owe you shit.”
Tumblr media
When in the face of well-deserved criticism, deflect deflect deflect. As if a broken record, I’d like to again emphasize that yes, legally they owe no one anything. Morally, they do. Legally, they don’t. Morally, yes. Legally, no.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
This, in essence, is a response to the majority of people who are like me, who aren’t screaming vitriolic personable attacks, telling them to drink bleach, long jog off a short pier, the works. Essentially: “If you aren’t with us, then you’re against us.”
Because apparently pointing out your blatant mischaracterisation of the gaming community, your outrageously awful personal relations skills, and most especially your morally bankrupt understanding of the relationship between you and the people financially supporting your passion project means we are, by their logic, on a level equivalent in nature to the 10+ people telling them to drink bleach.
Tumblr media
Fixed for typos:
Tumblr media
Remember how I said this was an “apology” in the loosest form, well what I was referring to was how in the beginning during their (totally unbiased) summary of the events, they more or less said “Sorry you didn’t respond the way we wanted you to.” Beyond that, yeah, it’s not an apology.
And why would we expect one? Nothing they have spat out in the face of their fans so far has even a hint of self-realization or self-reflection in it. Even their acknowledgement of their (horrendously under exaggerated) bad PR skills comes across as a hollow acknowledgement, if it can even be referred to as an acknowledgement at all, because if you truly truly acknowledged it, then this post wouldn’t exist.
Tumblr media
As to this anti-Semitic fabrication making the rounds, I have not seen it so I will take their word for it that they did not make one, especially since I have seen fabricated evidence involving Discord messages rearranged out of order. What I feel needs addressing specifically in this chunk though is his reference to “my messages taken out of context to insinuate I don’t care about our patrons/fans”, because if you’ve seen my previous post then you’ll know no amount of context makes this statement look good:
Tumblr media
Sure, it’s a true statement of fact now that they have Epic’s money, but it’s fairly obvious that it reads “We have Epic’s money now, we don’t need you anymore.” I’m sure they didn’t mean that, but that when combined with their other statements regarding how they don’t owe their patrons anything, what they are saying is clear as day.
But hey, credit where credit is due, at least with this we can agree:
Tumblr media
But of course, as these people are now infamously known for not ending their posts where they reasonably should...
Tumblr media
Now I know how much money goodwill, faith, and morals make, and again I would fully expect this kind of response from the likes of EA, Ubisoft, Bethesda, or fuck even Amazon or Facebook to show that corporate greed has no industry bounds, but this is a two person team whose passion project is to make this game which is being financially supported by loyal fans and future customers.
And that’s just it, that is the mind-boggling part to me, that this is all just the self-important, mischaracterising, morally bankrupt, and childishly ignorant ramblings of a small little husband and wife duo.
In summary...
As was said in the blog post, I’m sure that looking from the outside in we don’t get to see the full scope of the vitriolic comments they’re receiving, so to that I give them credit, and the most sincerest of apologies. I’ve received a few death threats and vitriolic hate-filed messages in my time on the internet, and while personally I am unphase by them, I can fully understand that it can be damaging to one’s self-esteem and self-confidence, especially when it comes in relation to your passion project. I am sorry.
But unwarranted, hate-filled, vitriolic, suicide-baiting messages do not invalid those of us criticizing you for the things that you did do, the words that you did say, and the actions that you did take. I mentioned this in my previous post, but as it stands, the centerpiece to this issue isn’t even about the Epic Exclusivity Deal anymore, it’s about you. You and your treatment, of not just the community at large (for which, might I add, is your primary customer base), but of your treatment towards your loyal fans and financial supporters along the way.
You, for whatever reason, act as most of us have come to expect a soulless and faceless triple-A publisher would, when in fact you are just a two person team with public faces. You’re taking the shots that the likes of EA, Activision, or Bethesda would and have taken, but you’re forgetting that it is above and beyond easier to find you then it is to find them.
All we, but more importantly your fans want from you is for you to make the best game that we all know you’re capable of. And for those who supported you this far along the way to be given even an ounce of respect, despite you not needing their support anymore.
121 notes · View notes
archiefm · 5 years
Text
Tumblr media
         ... claws my way up from hell once more and vomits onto the dash.... hello. its nora. i used to write rory bergstrom, but if u were here before that u might remember me as greta or alma putnam or..... som1 else.... an endless carousel of trash children..... this is finn, who i actually wrote for an early version of this rp abt 5yrs back now...... grits teeth..... so forgive me if im rusty i havent written him in a long time but seein honey boy gave me a lotta finn muse n im keen to get Back On The Horse yeehaww...
DYLAN O’BRIEN / CIS-MALE — don’t look now, but is that finn o’callaghan i see? the 25 year old criminology and forensic studies student is in their graduate year of study year and he is a rochester alum. i hear they can be judicious, adroit, morose and cynical, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet he will make a name for themselves living off-campus. ( nora. 24. gmt. she/her )
shakes my tin can a humble pinterest, ma’am....
finn has a bio pasted at the bottom (n written in like.... 2015.... gross) but it’s long  so if u don’t wanna read it here’s the sparknotes summary..... anyway this was written years ago n a lot of it seems really cliche and lame now but..... we accept the trash we think we deserve
grumpy, ugly sweater wearing, tech-savvy grandpa
very dry sense of humour and embraces nihilism. 
if ron swanson and april ludgate had a baby it would be finn
he was raised in derry, just south of dublin.
from a big family. elder sister called sinead. he also has a younger sister (aoife), a younger brother (colm), and a collie named lassie because his father lovs cliches (finn hates cliches but loves his dog). 
his father was a pub landlord and his mother worked at the market sellin fruit n veg when they met but got a job as a medical receptionist when she had kids cos it meant she cld be there with them in the day and work nights.
his parents met when they were p young and fiesty and rushed into marriage cos they were catholic n just wanted to have sex. his family were literally dirt-poor, but they had a lot of love i guess
hmmmmm his relationship w his father wasn’t the best cos i can’t write character who have healthy relationships w their parents throws up a peace sign. yh, had a pretty emotionally distant, alcoholic violent father n so gets a lot of his bad habits i.e. drinking as a coping mechanism and poor anger management from him BUT anyway
as a kid he was never very motivated in class, he always had a nervous itch to be off somewhere doing something else. struggled under government austerity bcso there just wasn’t the resources to support low income families where the kids had learning difficulties n needed support. fuck the tories am i right 
his mum suggested he try sports to help w his restless energy but he was never any good at football so he took up boxing and tap dance instead. he took to tap dancing like a fish to fuckin water. as adhd n found this as a really good way to use his excess energy in a creative way
had a few run ins with the police in his early teens for spray painting and graffiti, but he straightened himself out n now actually considering becoming a detective inspector??? cops are pigs.
he had a youtube channel where he posted videos of him tapdancing and breakdancing as a kid, basically would be a tiktok boy nowadays, n had like... a small fanbase in his early teens. attended several open auditions unsuccessfully, until he was finally cast in billy eliot when he was fifteen.
during billy eliot he began dating an italian dancer called nina. they became dance partners soon after and toured across the republic with various different shows (inc riverdance lol the classic irish stereotype). their relationship was p toxic tbh, they were both very hot tempered people and just used to argue and fight all the time.
he went semi-pro at tap dancing, and nina couldn’t stand being second best so she moved back to italy with her family. ignored his texts, phone calls, etc, eventually he was driven to the point where he used his savings to buy a plane ticket, showed up at her house and she was like wtf?? freaked out and filed a restraining order accusing him of stalking.
he was fined for harassment and then returned home to derry, but after the incident with nina he quit dancing for good and finished his leaving cert before heading to university in the US to get as far away from nina and his past life as poss. and basically since he quit dancing to study forensics (death kink. finn cant get enough of that morgue. just walks around sayin beat u) he’s become a massive grump and jsut doesn’t see the good in people any more.
u’ll find finn in an old man bar drinking whiskey bc he is in fact an old man at heart or sat on his roof smoking a joint, drawing wolves and lions and skeletons and shit, playing call of duty or getting blazed or at the corner of the room in a house party ignoring everyone and scrolling through twitter. is a massive e-boy. always up-to-date on memes and internet slang. has reddit as an app on his phone
not very good at communication. rather than solve his issues by talking, he’d prefer to just solve them through fighting or running away from his problems hence why he has come halfway across the world to get away from an issue which probs cld have been solved w a few apology emails.
takes a lot to phase him, but when his beserk button gets pressed he can become a bit pugnacious like an angry lil rottweiler. in his undergrad he was in a few fist fights but doesn’t really do tht any more as he doesn’t condone violence.
 in the previous version of this rp he was hospitalised like 5 times. pls, give my son a break. stop tryin to kill him. he literaly got a bottle smashed over his head and bled out all over his favourite angora rug that was the only light of his life
works at the campus coffee shop n always whines about how he’s a slave to capitalism. always smells of coffee
lives off campus with an elderly woman named Marianne, and basically gets reduced rent bcos he makes her dinner / keeps her company. they have a great bond
fan of karl marx. v big on socialism
insomniac with chronic nosebleeds
cynical about everything. too much of a fight club character 4 his own good n has his head up tyler durden’s sphincter
always confused or annoyed
statistics
basic information
full name: finnegan seamus o'callaghan nickname(s): finn age: 25 astrological sign: aries hometown: derry, ireland occupation: phd student / former street entertainer fatal flaw: cynicism positives: self-reliant, street smart, relaxed, intelligent, spontaneous, brave, independent, reliable, trustworthy, loyal. negatives: hostile, impulsive, stubborn, brooding, pugnacious, untrusting, cynical, enigmatic, reserved.
physical
colouring: medium hair colour: dark brown, almost black eye colour: brown height: 5’9” weight: 69kg build: tall, athletic voice: subtle irish accent, low, smooth. dominant hand: left scar(s): one on the left side of his ribs from a knife wound that he doesn’t remember getting cos he was drunk distinguishing marks: freckles, tattoo of a wolf howling at a moon allergies: pollen and the full spectrum of human emotion alcohol tolerance: high drunken behaviour: he becomes friendlier, far more conversational than when sober, flirtier, and generally more self-confident.
psychological
dreams/goals: self-fulfilment, travel the globe, experience life in its most alive and technicoloured version, make documentary films, help the vulnerable in society, grow as a human being.
skills: jack-of-all-trades, very fast runner, good at thieving things, talented tap dancer, good in crisis situations, dab-hand at mechanics, musically-intelligent, can throw a mean right hook and very capable of defending himself, can roll a cigarette, memorises quotes and passages of literature with ease, can light a match with his teeth.
likes: the smell of the earth after rain, poetry, cigarettes, shakespeare, whiskey, tattoos, travelling, ac/dc, deep conversations, leather jackets, open spaces, the smell of petrol, early noughties ‘emo phase’ anthems.
dislikes:  the government, parties, rules, donald trump, children, apple products, weddings, people in general, small talk, dependency, loneliness, pop music, public transport, justin timberlake, uncertainty.fears: fear itself, drowning alignment: true neutral mbti: istp – “while their mechanical tendencies can make them appear simple at a glance, istps are actually quite enigmatic. friendly but very private, calm but suddenly spontaneous, extremely curious but unable to stay focused on formal studies, istp personalities can be a challenge to predict, even by their friends and loved ones. istps can seem very loyal and steady for a while, but they tend to build up a store of impulsive energy that explodes without warning, taking their interests in bold new directions.” (via 16personalities.com)
full bio (lame as fuck written years ago..... pleathe...)
tw homophobia
born in quigley’s pub on the backstreets of sunny dublin, young finnegan o'callaghan was thrown kicking and screaming into the rowdy suburbs of irish drinking culture. the son of a landlord and a fishwife, he never had much in the way of earnings, but there was never a dull moment in his lively estate, where asbo’s thrived, but community spirit conquered. at school, finn was pegged as lazy and unmotivated, though truly his dyslexia made it hard for the boy to learn in the same environment of his peers and only made him more closed-off in class. struggling with anger management, finn moved from school to school, unable to fit the cookie-cutter mould that school enforced on him, though whilst academic studies were of little interest to the boy, he soon found his true passions lay in recreational activities. immersed into the joys of sport from as young as four, finn was an ardent munster fan and anticipated nothing more than the day he could finally fit into his brother’s old pair of rugby boots.
his calling finally came unexpectedly, not in the form of rugger, but through dance. to learn to express himself in a non-academic way, he began tap dancing, finding therapy in the beat of his soles against the cracked kitchen tiles (much to his mother’s disgrace). it wasn’t a conscious choice, finn just realised one day that dance was something that made him feel. a king of the streets, finn made his fortune on those cobbled pavements – dancing and drawing to earn his keep. by default, finn became a street artist, each penny he earned from his chalk drawings saved in a jam jar towards buying his first pair of tap shoes. though many of his less-than-amiable neighbours called him a nancy and a gaybo, finn refused to quit at his somewhat ‘unconventional’ hobby, for the young scrapper found energy, life, and released anger through the rhythm of tap. soon he branched out into street dance, hip hop, break dancing, lyrical, his days spent smacking his scuffed feet against the broken patio into the night.
when he was thirteen he took up boxing, and as expected, his newfound ‘macho’ pastime conflicted with his dancing. the boxers called him ‘soft’; the dancers called him ‘inelegant’. he felt like two different people; having to choose between interests was like being handed a knife and asked to which half of himself he wished to cut away. he couldn’t afford professional training in dance, with most schools based in england and limited scholarships available. instead, he made the street his studio, racking up a small fanbase on youtube. when he was fifteen he made his debut in billy eliot at the olympia theatre in dublin. enter nina de souza, talented, beautiful and italian; ballet dancer, operatic singer, genius whiz kid, and spoiled brat. she was selfish, conceited, hell bent on getting her own way, and every director’s nightmare. finn fell for her like a house of cards. he’d always had a soft spot for girls who meant trouble. and so their hellish courtship began.
by the time they were seventeen, the two young swans had danced in every playhouse across the republic. they were known in theatres across the country for their tempestuous personalities, their raging arguments with one another, their tendency to drop out of shows altogether without any notice, yet the money kept rolling in and the audiences continued to grow. for three years, their families continued to put up with their hysterical fights followed by passionate reconciliations. he was too possessive, and she was too wild. their carcrash of a relationship finally came to a catastrophic halt when nina broke off the whole affair and returned to italy with her family. for months finn tried to contact her, yet his phone calls, texts, facebook messages were always ignored, until finally he was driven to drastic measures and used his savings to get a plane to her home town. when finn turned up uninvited at nina’s house she freaked out – and rightly so – she contacted her agent, accused him of stalking her, and had a restraining order placed against him. finn was arrested, held in a station overnight, and charged with harassment before he was allowed to return to dublin.
after the incident with nina, finn lost the fight in his eyes. he became far more hostile, far less likely to retaliate with his own fists, and picked fights not for the thrill of feeling his own fists pummel another into a wall, but for the sensation of his own brittle bones cracking. he dropped his tap shoes in a dumpster, stopped talking to his friends, followed his father’s advice and went back to school to complete his leaving certificate. a few short months later, and finn was packing his bags, saying his bittersweet goodbyes, and travelling half-way across the globe to be as far away as possible from his past self, his mess of a life, and most of all nina. it seemed somehow ironic that the boy who had been cautioned by the garda so much during his youth for spray painting, busking without a liscence, and raucous parties would become the grumpy, aloof overseas student studying a degree in criminology; that his once reckless spirit could be crushed so easily. 
of all things that finn could be called, straightforward would never be one of them. ever since his first days in atticus, the boy was pegged as hostile, hot-headed, cynical, rude. he seemed to spend more time in his thoughts than engaging in conversation. like a ticking time-bomb, finn’s anger was of the calm kind, liable to explode without a moment’s noticed. his unpredictable personality make him something of an enigma to those who aren’t amiable with the lad, though hostile as he may appear, he harvests a good heart. loyalty lies at the centre of his affections, and whilst his friends are few in number, he makes a lifelong partner. somewhere within finn, there’s still some fight left, but mostly he has recognised that his hedonistic lifestyle did little to leave him fulfilled – mostly, it just emptied him out – and over his three years at university has resigned himself to a nihilistic predicament.
        if u wanna plot with me pls pls pls im me or like this post!! i am always game for plots i love em so excited to write with you all here r some ideas
study buddies. finn is now a phd student so has to start takin shit seriously. he gon be in the library every day doing that independent study. if he had ppl who were also regular library goers n they get each other coffees to save time.... tht wld be sweet
ppl who love techno dj sets and going super hard on the weekends!!! fuck yea
friends with benefits. exes on bad terms. ppl he tried to date but couldnt because he’s always emotionally hung up on someone else. spicy hook up plots
ppl he met touring?? maybe ppl who were also in the entertainment industry..... anyone got a character who is ex circus hit me up
does anyone else study criminology / forensics / criminal psych / law? phd students sometimes lecture so he cld be an assistant lecturer / tutor if ur character is in a younger year
gamers !!! social recluses !!! hermits !!
finn goes to the skatepark and all the young boys there think he’s a gradnpa which he is! 
8 notes · View notes
chaosbcrne · 5 years
Text
lil ooc update abt current situation + whats happening with this blog etc
where to start. i think it’s obvious i’ve been struggling a bit recently, for anyone who paid attention to the quite many times where i kept cursing holiday season for keeping me too busy and exhausted to do stuff here and stating that as soon as i would get a breather i would get stuff done, and then that... didn’t really happen. i had almost a whole week off and could not, for the life of me, get myself to work on drafts, or anything really. it wasn’t just in terms of rp, literally everything else i was planning to get done during my time off did not get done. the moment i told myself ‘ok, you can relax now’ my brain switched off and all i could do was idly play games and watch random series. which in itself is not a bad thing. i know with hindsight after what i dealt with during the holiday (and arguably the whole month of december), it was important that i gave myself a break, a real break. 
the bad thing is the guilt i felt at not being able to keep my word.
and frankly, it wasn’t even because i lacked motivation. it’s just that it never... ends. not that i should want it to, because this is a enjoyable hobby, but whenever i find the time and inspiration to dive into things here, it increases, in a way. the more i do, the more i have to do. the main example being for the christmas stuff i never finished, or the couple of memes i’ve tried to do this week. i go in motivated, full steam ahead. get 3, 4, 5 things done, so more are sent my way, and it feels like what i’ve managed to accomplish up to that point was pointless because it only gets attention in the form of people asking for more of it, if that makes sense. what i do never... feels fully rewarding, in a way. and it kind of deters me from wanting to keep going, even if its flattering that so many people are interested.
given that, like i said, whenever i go into these im motivated and fully intending to get it done, there’s no obvious solution to it. im not a big fan of putting hard caps on things, be it memes or starter calls or whatnot, as sometimes i just get more inspiration for some than others regardless of what order they came in. so the only thing i can do about that particular issue is be more selective. which, is not something i like much either, knowing how many people here suffer from RSD, and that anyone who sends something in that i don’t actually get to will likely feel rejected to a degree. unfortunately it’s probably the best course of action for me, if i want to keep doing stuff without burning the fun out of it. i’ll do my best to find some kind of balance, and i apologize to people who will feel let down because of this.
something else that i feel has been damaging my capacity to get stuff done here is, in a way, my activity. not as in, how much writing i do, but the fact that, as i’ve stated in another post a couple of weeks ago, both my home life and work situation allow me to check on the dash almost constantly. which i love ! i don’t want that to change. i love being able to see what everyone is up to, and almost always being around to join in on whatever discussion or playful discourse is going on, whether ic or ooc. the problem with having such a constant access to the dash is that it leaves me feeling like i should always be doing something productive on said dash. which is incredibly unhealthy, ultimately. this is something else i’ve brushed upon over the last few weeks, but my level of accessibility should not dictate how active/productive i must be.
and this is why i feel like things have been going downhill over the past few months for me here, in terms of actual activity, and also quality (in my opinion); always feeling like im not doing as much as i should for someone who gets to be online as much as i am. because now, whenever i get actual, suitable free time to write, it feels like every other hour of the day where i could technically be writing but am not, and it typically passes me by just the same.
once again, it’s not something i intend to change, per se. i don’t plan to force myself to check on the dash less often or anything like that, and i still want rp to remain one of my main hobbies because i really do love it ! but i need to find a way to make myself not feel like i should always be doing more just because im there, so when i do get that perfect time to write, im motivated to actually use it.
i suppose this is the closest thing i have to a new years resolution: finding a couple of other things to keep busy with throughout my downtime, both at work and at home, so that even if i can always keep an eye on the dash i dont pressure myself to get things done and ruin the experience for myself.
so i can actually hold myself accountable for that, i’ve applied to take some online classes (i want to eventually graduate college despite working full time), so i can spend my downtime at work doing homework instead of scrolling on tumblr and wishing i could will myself to write. i’ve finally secured a url for a potential art blog so i can have a place to dump my aimless doodles on and hopefully, by extension, make it more of a habit to practice and draw. sometime this year i want to teach myself hand-sewing too. anyone who knows me knows that im obsessed with stuffed animals and i want to have made one myself by the end of 2020, no matter how simplistic.
ultimately, i don’t think any of these changes will affect my activity much, since, like i said, i wasn’t being nearly as active as i could have been anyway just because i put so much pressure on myself to be doing things just because i was there. i wholeheartedly believe that pushing myself to take interest in pastimes other than rp will make my actual rp experience a lot more enjoyable and productive when i actually sit down to write.
in any case, i wanna thank everyone for both their patience and understanding, as always. im very thankful for the friends i made here and the many talented partners i get to write with, and i just want that to show in the content i put out from now on.
4 notes · View notes
ledamemangociana · 5 years
Text
2020 20 questions meme time UWU
i was tagged by @decertatio to do this! i havent spent enough time on here recently to tag anyone, B U T! if you see this and would like to do this, consider yourself tagged, and let me know! i wanna read your answers UWU
-----
1. Do you make your bed? - GAWD NO, at least not 70% of the time, im so bad at this. it’s coz on the weekdays, i start working at 6:30am or 7am at home coz my bosses are in Australia and a lot of our clients are in Australia and/or New Zealand, and they’re 3 or 4 hours ahead of us, so i gotta get on those emails and support case tickets as soon as i can, so i give myself about an hour to catch up, and then i hurry out of the condo to get to the office before im marked late at 10am lolololol. on the weekends, when im at home, BECAUSE im just at home, i never fix my bed coz im in it 85% of the time anyway lakdjf
2. What’s your favorite number?  - 13, cliche as it sounds. not coz i think it’s lucky or anything, but because other people around me thought it was. i kind of clung onto it when i was in high school coz i wanted to fit in by standing out.
3. What’s your job? - An accounts and client services manager at a digital services agency.
4. If you could, would you go back to school? - Probably not. I love learning, HATE studying. 
5. Can you parallel park? - i never got far enough into being taught how to drive by mom to get to parking
6. A job you had which would surprise people? I think every job I’ve ever held, tbh. I graduated interior design mainly because my dad told me to when i asked him if i should enroll in advertising instead (the entrance exam i passed was good for either course). the only ID job i ever had lasted only two weeks, at a firm i had to do my internship/OJT at. it was my first job, and i was let go after two weeks. after that, i was a call center agent for two months, and then a copywriter for 6 months, and then an SEO specialist for a year and a half, and then a social media content/community manager at one firm for one year, and then for another agency for 3 and a half, and now im in my second year as an accounts manager at a digital services cloud agency. even i’m surprised at this job list tbh.
7. Do you think aliens are real? - i absolutely do believe that we are not the only life in this big, huge, wide, expansive universe that the planet earth is but a miniscule blip on. there’s definitely other life out there.
8. Can you drive a manual car? - i haven’t driven a car legitimately outside of learning how to drive, but yeh i probably can, since that was what my mom taught me with.
9. What’s your guilty pleasure? - junk food and soft drinks, but in general i try not to feel guilty about anything i take pleasure in
10. Tattoos? - none, but i am ACHING for them. i’ve had ideas for a loooong time. one that i DEFINITELY want to get as my first one is part of a letter that i found that my mom wrote for me in high school. “i know that you will be able to stand up for yourself and the world will stop and take notice.” i still have the letter, so i still have it in her handwriting. i want it on the inside of my left forearm. 
11. Favorite color? - Pink! lighter/softer/pastel shades are my preferred ones, but i love any shade or hue of pink tbh
12. Things people do that drive you crazy? - i hate fake guilt trips. like, when someone wants me to do something that i can’t do, they’ll come in with like “nah, it’s fine, i’ll just drop all these SUPER IMPORTANT things im doing and go out of my way to do this thing that im asking you to do because i’m SOOOOO sorry that you’re unable to do it yourself” coz it’s like...dude, if you really were able to do that or if you wanted to actually do that, you wouldn’t have asked me to do the thing in the first place. like, you’re clearly just saying that to make me feel bad enough to make me drop everything im doing and do whatever it is you asked me to do. i also hate when ppl fish for compliments by being falsely humble or self-deprecating. like. PLEASE, y’all, i’ve lived with negative amounts of self-esteem for literal decades, i know the difference between actual self-loathing and you just wanting to hear good things about yourself that you don’t want to be called narcissistic for saying about yourself. i know what it sounds like when someone is actually going THRU something or is actually having an actual hard time accepting themselves and/or asking people for what they need as opposed to when someone just wants to be told something. like. don’t insult my intelligence and experiences like that. granted, there are nuances to consider for all of these things, bUT like i said, i know the differences when i see them.
13. Any Phobias? - i have a phobia of drowning that’s light enough to NOT keep me away from water but bad enough to sometimes make watching or listening to scenes where someone could potentially drown to set some triggers off for me. i also just have a really really bad fear of dying because of getting my oxygen cut off, coz that sounds like a really slow, painful way to die.
14. Favorite childhood sport? - i was never really a sports kid. the only sport i ever really enjoyed playing willingly was badminton. i trained for a few summers but never competed, but i got good enough to make games in a court fun. i still have my badminton racquet, it’s the only Legit™ badminton racquet in the house (it’s a Yonex, handed down to me by my trainer, only been restrung twice or thrice coz the last restringing was done so damn well), all the other racquets were inexpensive unbranded knock-offs that were good enough for me and my family to have casual games with.
15. Do you talk to yourself? - yes but mostly as a product of deep focus or concentration, or really heavy emotion. having social media has lessened doing it for the latter since i can just vent on here or on twitter, but when im doing stuff for work that’s hard or needs a lot of focus or concentration, i have full-on stand-up meetings with myself.
16. What movie do you adore? - “Romy And Michele’s High School Reunion.” it’s not a perfect movie by any means, but for someone who was a bullied outcast for much of elementary and high school years in a private, all-girls, Catholic school where everyone was tall and thin and pretty and pale and smart and popular, ALL the things that i wasn’t, it was - is? - like a beacon or a hug.
17. Do you like doing puzzles? - heck yeh, coz solving them makes me feel smart, and not being able to solve them but learning HOW to is so much fun for me.
18. Favorite kind of music? - i don’t know that i have one, to be honest, i haven’t listened to current radio in literal YEARS because i dont own a radio in the condo, i barely watch TV anymore, and i dont spend enough time in a vehicle to really know what’s up. i enjoy pop, hip-hop, rnb, showtunes.
19. Tea or coffee? - more of a coffee person myself, actual tea always just tastes LEGITIMATELY like leaf water to me, and i cant find a liking for it. i do really love sweet tea and milktea tho. but yeh, im mostly a bean juice person.
20. The first thing you remember you wanted to be when you grew up? - An architect, like my dad. i thought i would be one, up until i discovered writing in high school, and then i thought i wanted to become a journalist until i took it up as my first course in college and hated it. but yeh, it was always “architect! like daddy!” when i was asked that question when i was a kid. i looked up to him so much as a kid, and he and i were super tight when i was younger coz i was his firstborn and a daughter. we used to call each other best friends. i miss those days a lot; things between us seemed simpler, but maybe that’s because i didn’t have the ideals, knowledge and capacity to question the way he loves/loved me as My Parent™. our relationship these days is absolutely skewed and skewered.
2 notes · View notes
7dys · 6 years
Text
roomies?
Tumblr media
hey again im a dummy sorry
I literally could NOT think of a title im sorry here's a good ole roommate au though
request: HHhHhHhh u write so well I'm crying :(( jshsd can I get a roommate!au with jae from day6 ? with a possible fluff at the end ? eye emoji ? sjdshd tysm !! -anon
word count: 5137 she's a doozy
a/n: I must have gotten this request like... a year and a half ago at least anon if you’re seeing this I apologize but I've finally done it!!! hope u all enjoy the workings of my crackhead brain
right-o lets get to it
okay so when you moved out of your dorms after graduation you weren’t expecting it to be this God Damn Expensive
on top of buying groceries and affording your tiny ass one bedroom a girlie was struggling
so !! you decided to look into finding a roommate
obviously not to move in with you…. there’s only one bedroom okay
but like searching for an open spot with someone
you found a few that seemed nice but were all wayyyyyyy too far from your job like you would be losing money paying so much in transportation
finally you stumbled across the most cursed roommate flyer ever
but it was in a super convenient location !! so you read it anyways
it was written in GREEN and PURPLE comic sans and there were multiple pictures of chickens and cheesy memes randomly placed around the text in the middle
which by the way was a list of 7 bullet points that said this:
1:my name is jae
2:i am broke
3:i have an extra room waiting for /YOU/
4:i am in a band and will write a song about you if that’s what it takes
5:i am unreasonably good at untangling headphones and i will untangle things for you
6:i have a pet cat and if you don’t like that walk away from this flyer immediately
7:please
and then at the bottom was an octopus who’s 8 legs had his contact information on it and they were cut so you could just pull off a slip
if you were an ordinary person you would not have taken one
lucky us !!!! you’re just crazy
and you take one of the god damn octopus legs
you are understandably the only person who has taken one so far
you giggle to yourself at your own SHEER STUPIDITY and then send a text to the number
you: hi !! i saw ur ad abt looking for a roommate and i’m interested! my name is y/n and i’m still in college so u don’t have to worry about me being like . crazy im just stressed
chicken guy??: oh my god really it’s been a month since i put up that poster!! also mood
you: you put up …. only one poster …… and it was that ……
chicken guy??: it worked for u didn’t it
you: . touché
chicken guy??: anyways you can come by later today and check it out if you’d like? i swear i’m not crazy either but feel free to bring a friend if you’re worried for safety reasons or whatever
you: nah i prefer to live life on The Edge plus none of my friends would be helpful in a life threatening situation
chicken guy??: i don’t know u but i’m already worried for u pls get here soon
hehehe u liked this guy
he was funny if anything
and you tended to find all the weirdos of society and befriend them so it was safe to assume he was no different than your usual crowd
true to your word you go to the address he sent you alone later that afternoon and cheerily knock on the door
while you wait for him to answer you survey the outside
it’s honestly ….. kind of a cluttered mess but in a cute way
like some sort of kleptomaniac crow somehow got an apartment and displayed all of the strange things it found
except it’s all music related
there is a jar that is filled to the BRIM with guitar picks.
who needs that many guitar picks
“me, i do”
you squeak and turn around and go
“??????”
and the tall thin man in the door just nods
“i knew what you were thinking”
“...that’s fair”
and then he seems to remember what exactly is going on and extends one long fingered hand for a shake
“hi! you must be y/n :)) i’m jae”
you take his hand …. that shits warm
how long have you been outside that your hand is so cold when you touch him you SHIVER
he’s like oh my god come in please you’re shivering jesus christ
and you just smile and tell him it’s nice to meet him !!! what a positive polly
you come in and are pleasantly surprised that the inside has just as much personality as the poster !!
and thankfully less green and purple and ….. comic sans
you are immediately greeted by the largest tabby cat you’ve ever seen
“ah that’s my big boy mister crackers”
“his name … is mister crackers”
“....yes”
“love it. tell me more”
he smiles so BIG and WIDE when you say that you think you’re looking at the sun
as he explains more things about the apartment and points at things here and there you half listen and half just. watch him
you didn’t know what to expect from that as but it’s fair to say you lucked out as far as possible roommates go
he was tall and had shiny dark hair and glasses that made his cute little eyes even littler
and he was in a BAND that is so cool
plus he’s like …. pretty or smth
smh FOCUS
you’re gnna have to share a bathroom with him which is … scary but you looked in there and it looks clean at least
also there’s some candles in there
……. he definitely takes candlelit baths like a widow just returning from her rich husbands funeral after he left her everything in the will
king
he seems nice and funny and you appear to have a similar sense of humor …. you’re in
you’re about to tell him you’ll think about it so that you don’t come off as too excited
but then change your mind and jump up and down and tell him you’re IN and you’ll help cover the rent and cook sometimes and bake him cookies and
he stops you after cookies with a hand over your mouth
“you are perfect. please move in immediately”
you smile under his hand and hope he can’t feel your cheeks getting absolutely BLAZING hot
(he 100% can)
((and he thinks it’s really CUTE))
you grab the hand that’s over your mouth and give it a shake and tell him in a southern accent that it’s a deal pardner and he SNORTS
it was cute
you move in as quickly as possible and his band mates come over to help you move everything !!
you’re high key embarrassed to let all these literally gorgeous men into your tiny little apartment and touch all your stuff
but after talking to each of them for like 5 seconds you quickly see they’re all a bunch of nerds and you would trust them with your life
wonpil loses his MIND when he sees your little plushy collection on your bed he thinks you’re the cutest person on the whole planet
he tells jae that’s he’s the luckiest man on earth when he thinks you’re not listening
you ARE though and you stop what you’re doing to give him a big ol hug and tell him he’s an angel
sungjin disapproves of how you’ve been living and asks if you’ve been eating enough and then turns on jae with a finger like U BETTER FEED HER
brian is so intimidatingly beautiful you can’t look him in the eye until you’re all eating ramen and you watch him choke to near death and then immediately go make himself another cup
relatable
dowoon looked lost and you immediately took him under your wing and you’ve been babying him ever since
you made jae take the box full of your plates and mugs and such bc it was too heavy for your Little Angel
“please y/n i am literally the strongest of all of us let me carry things. jae is going to keel over and die”
“nonsense !!! you’re a growing boy you need rest”
“please i literally punched a HOLE in a WALL on ACCIDENT and jae has a grass allergy i promise i will be fine”
regardless of the absolute struggle it was to coordinate everyone and get all your stuff to jae’s you are FINALLY moved in
your room is obviously not the master but you weren’t gonna be like Sorry Jae I Need The Master Bedroom Move Out Xoxo
it’s cute and you brought your own furniture and some posters and decor that you had all over your old apartment
basically you just condensed it all into one room
and the boys gave you a housewarming present and it was just a picture of them performing with you badly photoshopped next to jae playing the triangle
it wasn’t even framed they just taped it to the wall
typical
after all the moving in the boys leave you and jae to settle in but the moving was TIRING so
you’re already asleep on the couch
……….typical
jae just shakes his head and covers you with one of his large sweatshirts because for some reason he only owns one blanket and it’s on his bed and he doesn’t know where yours are
he’s literally HELPLESS
you wake up with a dry mouth at 3 in the morning and smile at jaes sweater barely covering your curled up body
you hold it up and it says “i like ugly” in tiny font .
this boy is perfect
you put it on and climb in your actual bed and decide to make him breakfast tomorrow for being such an angel
you set an ALARM that’s commitment if i’ve ever seen it
you make him pancakes and and coffee and when he comes out wearing a sweatshirt similar to the one you’re wearing and the rattiest sweatpants you’ve ever seen he doesn’t even notice anything at first
nd then he rubs his eyes and just stares
“y/n i’m gonna cry i haven’t had breakfast since 2008”
you laugh and launch yourself at him because he’s That cute
“you’re so cute thank you for letting me be your roommate !!!!”
he ruffles your hair and then sets his chin on top of your head
“thanks for breakfast, sunshine. even if this is also as early as i’ve been awake since 2008”
you pinch his side at that and then go to serve him a heaping pile of pancakes bc he’s skinny and he needs it
“alright noodle eat up!!”
“did you just call me noodle?”
“yes, look at yourself”
“.. that’s fair”
you guys chat over breakfast and thank GOD it’s a sunday and neither of you have shit to do
other than laundry
you force yourself not to mom him when he just puts it all in one machine and sets it on cold and leaves .
it hurts tho
instead of being productive while you wait you have multiple staring contests
jae keeps accusing you of saying he blinked when he didn’t
“i didn’t blink my eyes just look like that !!!! they are small and asian are you racist or something??”
“shut UP i won >:((((“
after the laundry is done you go your separate ways and jae heads out to band practice and it’s your very first time …
alone in your own apartment
naturally you take off your pants and dance around for at least 10 minutes
you didn’t even realize that since your roommate is a dude you can’t just ….. not wear pants
a travesty !!!
honestly let him try to stop you from going braless though. let him try.
you laze around and try to get caught up on your favorite shows and organize your room and then it gets late and you decide you’re going to make a MEAL for dinner
like a WHOLE . MEAL.
we’re going all out
you tie your hair up and put on your cooking sweater which is just a disgusting old sweatshirt covered with stains that hangs almost to the middle of your thighs
everyone needs one
next step is MUSIC because if you cook without it you just feel sad
we’re pulling out the oldies mix that’s right
i’m talking ELO, reo speedwagon, the doobie brothers we’re getting DOWN !!!!!
perhaps we’ll sprinkle some queen in there in honor of the movie that just came out
regardless you’re head banging while you chop vegetables
extremely unsafe but entirely necessary
jae comes home in the middle of your dramatic rendition of bohemian rhapsody where you attempt to sing every single part including the operatic harmonies
you are literally on your knees singing dramatically when the door opens and he comes out of the foyer to see YOU on the FLOOR wearing NO PANTS and singing QUEEN
you may just be ……. the most perfect woman he’s ever met in his life
he joins you because what the fuck else is he supposed to do
he comes in on the high GALILEO and then air guitars THE FUCK out of the next part while you literally thrash
i’m telling you it was one of the most taxing things you’ve ever done
you finish out the song and then fist bump for respect
“something smells good but also something smells burning”
and you scream because OH NO THE GARLIC BREAD
((it’s not even that burnt jae is just weird about smells …… grass allergy headass))
after the fake crisis is averted you finish up and the both of you FEAST while watching cheesy christmas movies and booing at love
you’re both . that bitter huh
also want to note that at some point you discreetly put sleep shorts on so you could pretend you hadn’t been pantless and possibly flashing your day of the week underwear to your roommate of like 36 hours
and when you’re literally seconds away from sleep jae boops you on the nose
like . kinda hard
“hey go to sleep this couch is not comfortable i promise”
“shut up you’re BONEY everything is uncomfortable for you”
“okay now you’re just being mean get your ass in bed”
“sorryyy :((((“
“yea yea go away weirdo”
you tell him goodnight and hug him extra tight in apology and he pats your head so like. all is forgiven hehe
that night when you flop in bed and wrap yourself around one of your pillows you’re pretty damn pleased with your roommate choice
time skip you and jae have almost 0 boundaries other than the necessary ones that keep you Platonic Friends and not Married Couple
which is basically just any affection beyond hugs nd the occasional snuggle
you heard me
the boys are in your apartment . all the time
literally all the time
and wonpil drunk cries to your stuffed animals about never finding love
PLEASE someone save him please
nights like those you and jae go full parent mode because everyone’s drunk so sungjin can’t do it himself
he’s too busy literally breakdancing in your living room
he moved the coffee table out of the way and everything
after everyone is put in beds (dowoon gets to deal with wonpil‘s cry snuggling … sorry)
you and jae always collapse on the couch actually exhausted because you both have weak cardiovascular health and you just carried four full grown men
you end up leaned up against each other for support and then sagging until one of you falls over onto their back and the other just follows
it varies which one of you ends up the big spoon and it’s so CUTE when you do
you think jae pushes you over a little because he likes it too but he would rather die than admit he likes being snuggled so
you’ll fall over onto your back and jae will pretend to be surprised but then wriggle up your body until he’s half on top of you and half on the side with his head resting just under your chin
his hair is FLUFFY and it TICKLES you so you have to move it so you can sleep !
that’s what you tell yourself when you comb his hair down with your fingers
you pretend not to hear him sigh and feel it against the skin of your neck
you also pretend he hasn’t wrapped both arms around your rib cage like a vice and is not letting go anytime soon
cutie :(
he tucks his forehead into your neck and you physically feel his whole body relax and wow . so this is what peace is like
of course it lasts for 5 whole seconds before wonpil let’s out an actual wail and dowoon is urgently whispering shut the fuck up PLEASE SHUT UP
jae snorts against your neck and gives a minute shake of his head, splaying his hand across your ribs and tugging you farther into his hold
first of all. that ticKLES and it takes every shred of self control not to squirm
second: at this point he’s practically trying to fuse your bodies together really you cannot physically get closer than you are
you’re absolutely enjoying it though so you wrap your arms around him and settle in with one leg flopped over his and a blanket you pulled off the floor haphazardly thrown over the two of you
he’s such a SNUGGLE BUG you can barely believe it
he just loves to pretend he’s some angsty lonely dude who plays guitar and SKATEBOARDS like the giant cliche he is
when actually he is a Big Baby
he texts you to calculate the tip for him whenever he’s out to eat with the boys because he “swore off math in 2014”
he asks you if his outfits are okay nd he always looks like an old man but you still tell him it’s good
you think so at least <33
you can read each other so well it’s scary
you’ll walk in the living room and jae will be like NOPE i’m leaving
and you’re like what :(((((((
and he’s like i just KNOW you’re about to yell about random shit we both personally have no control over and it gives me ~anxiety~
“okay well i was just gonna say that global warming is a real proble-“
“LA LA LA I CANT HEAR YOU”
(he thinks global warming is real he just. doesn’t want to talk abt it bc he knows you will Never Shut Up once you start)
you hand him coffee on his way out in the mornings when you know he has a long day ahead and he pats you on the head in thanks every time
jae cooks for you too !!! we love equality
he sticks to pretty simple stuff but he was living alone for a while so he had to know at least a little so he could like. survive
and believe it or not the both of you are not always sunshine and daffodils
when you’re upset he always knows and makes sure to be there if you need anything but basically just leave you alone
he has a tendency to misread the situation and think it’s still cool for him to joke around but you are Actually Angry
and it’s gotten him into lots of trouble so instead he is supportive from afar and does his best to be not offensive
when he’s upset he’s usually super mopey and writes sad song lyrics all day
you forcefully drag him out of his room to make sure he eats and do your best to cheer him up by whatever means necessary
you’ve embarrassed yourself just to hear that laugh of his
the one where he opens his mouth really wide and gasps a little and his eyes squeeze shut
……… fuckin cute
anyways you guys are just dating already but don’t even realize
until one of your coworkers asks you to come out after work and you say no
and it’d be Friendly and Normal if you did it because you promised jae you would cook that night
or you had made plans with him or something
but you were just uncomfortable doing any of that kind of stuff with some Not Jae guy
and after that your eyes are ~wide open~ sister
you find yourself giggling a little too long when he jokes around with you
you can’t help it okay his presence is like a RUSH of serotonin
and imagining yourself doing couple things with jae
turning your usual dinner outings into dates in your head where he holds your hand as he drives and sits next to you in the booth so he can sling a long arm around your shoulders
you let yourself become the slightest bit more affectionate
tucking yourself under his chin every night before you split to your separate rooms
tugging on his hand to get his attention and then playing with his long fingers
you know he notices because god damn how could he not notice ??
he has literally bad vision but he can read the signs
This Ain’t His First Rodeo
he is hesitant to become involved with someone he depends on so much
the age old dilemma of wanting someone but then being afraid to lose them because of it
he wouldn’t admit it but you were quite literally the light of his life
he had been so lonely in his apartment before, living off of instant ramen simply because he didn’t want to cook anything and holing up in his room writing about loneliness and being lost
then you showed up with your bright eyes and took every weird quirk of his in stride and nagged him about eating better and washing his clothes “properly”
(he thinks when you say “properly” you just mean your own way but that’s besides the point)
he even liked when you would take his glasses and wear them and do terrible impressions of him because you looked so CUTE in them
he thinks you’d look cute in all of his belongings but again
are the both of you ready to cross that line?
of course u are lol what else am i supposed to write about
fourth wall break: over
okay so wonpil keeps coming over when he knows jae is gone to try to convince you that the two of you are in love and should get married and have little mini jaes and whatnot
you inform him that he’s CRAZY and that jae thinks of you as a roommate and friend and that’s IT
and as much as you want to think you’re denying wonpil because you’re embarrassed you’re starting to actually believe it
he’s never shown any sort of real interest in you that is out of the realm of Friendly Roommates
and yeah sometimes you guys snuggle but wonpil is literally wrapped around your right arm at this very second so . not valid
wonpil is basically BEGGING at this point for you to see what he sees
which is jae actually being sickeningly in love with you
even if you did believe him at all …. that’s an exaggeration and you both know it
“y/n he’s writing a SONG. about YOU. that boy love loves you. big time”
“people write songs for their friends all the time”
“not jae !! he’s never written a song that hasn’t been about love or loss, you choose which one you’ll be”
“oh shit that was deep”
“i know right? can you believe i came up with that on the spot? wig.”
and then you smack him for being a fckin twitter stan and continue with your argument
jae walks in just as it starts to get physical
wonpil is latched onto your leg as you squirm and wiggle around trying to throw the LEECH off your leg
jae detaches him with a well placed finger between his ribs that makes him squeal Very Loudly and let go
unfortunately you had been leaning all your weight to one side to counteract wonpil and when he let go you went careening sideways
jae just barely grabbed your wrist and yanked you back up
and then you stumbled into him and he stumbles and you both almost fall before getting your shit together
you’re standing pressed together with his feet spread apart so that you’re a little bit closer to his height as you latch onto his shoulders for balance
one of his arms slides around your middle to hold you against him while he used the other to make sure his guitar case doesn’t just fall off his shoulder
wonpil is on the ground holding his rib cage and fake crying when jae goes
“enough wonpil i could hear you yelling like a block away what is going on here???”
you peep out a nothing !!! at the same time wonpil yells
“i’m trying to convince y/n of TRUE LOVE that’s what”
“oh …. y/n is in love?”
“y/n is in DENIAL”
you plead with him to stop please wonpil
and he is relentlessly ranting about how you refuse to “see the light” and how happy you could be
jae sees that this is actually upsetting you from your flushed cheeks and furrowed eyebrows and the way you clutch the hem of his sweatshirt
“alright that’s enough. wonpil go home you lovesick fool”
wonpil trudges out and gives you a sneaky kiss on the cheek
jae has to hold you back when you lunge after him
after you’ve calmed down he slowly slides his arm from being wrapped around your middle to just barely brushing your back
you didn’t mean to get so worked up but like . wonpil is good at that okay
and he was basically going to out you to jae ????:??:!:?:$,&3!:8;
that’s a stressful event
you feel your breathing even out and you sigh in frustration
“i’m sorry y/n, he does that sometimes :/“
“it’s fine it was just . a lot”
“yeah”
you stand in silence for a good minute when jae drops his hand from your back and ducks his chin
“was he…. telling the truth?”
and you want to die because wonpil wasn’t even there and you’re still getting outed !!!!
“which part?”
“the part where you’re in love with someone”
“i wouldn’t say ….. love”
“oh”
and this is just painful so you take a deep breath and just
“okay listen i really really get it if you don’t return the feelings and it’s fine i just … please don’t kick me out i really love living here and all your band members coming over and i even love wonpil !!!! even though he’s a little crazy !!! and i love your fat cat mr.crackers and dancing around to old green day and watching shitty romance movies just to make fun of them and i just don’t want this to end!! we can forget it ever happened and i swear i’ll just. get over it or something and i-“
“okay don’t get too hasty about forgetting it i haven’t even said anything yet”
you stare at him wide eyed
“i’m sorry . what.”
“i can’t believe it took wonpil bodily attacking you for you to say that”
and then he drops his guitar with a thud and steps into your space to slide a warm hand around the nape of your neck
he pulls you closer and stops when your noses brush
“is this okay?” he whispers
“why are you whispering?” you whisper back
“shut up” he breathes right back
he smiles and then tugs you forward and tilts his head down to plant his lips on yours
he’s soft and tentative and pulls away after just a few seconds to press kisses to your cheeks and the tip of your nose
“if it’s worth anything i like you too,”
“are you kidding me that’s worth EVERYTHING ???”
and then you pounce on him and bury your face into the dip of his shoulder because you can’t reach his neck
damn skyscraper
he stumbles at first but then smiles down at your flushed face absolutely squished against his bony chest
he thinks it’s cute though and cranes his neck down to lay his cheek across the top of your head and loop his arms around you
dating jae is even better than you thought it would be !!!
wonpil wasn’t lying when he said jae was writing a song for you and when he plays it for you and sings so sweetly you cry your fckin eyes out
and he’s laughing and pulling you in to situate you on his lap with his guitar long forgotten leaning against the couch and asking you when you became such a softie
you look up at him with tears in your eyelashes and love in your eyes and he positively melts
he kisses your forehead and ruffles your hair and calls you kid like he didn’t just profess his undying love for you through song like the cliche he is
the two of you spend the whole night wrapped up in each other, expressing all the affection you’d missed out on in the last few weeks
you hadn’t realized how…. touchy jae is until now
he can barely function without his good morning kiss
“y/n i am a weak, weak man pls give me a kiss or else i won’t make it through the day,”
..you also hadn’t realized he was this dramatic lmao
the boys supremely unsurprised when they burst into your apartment to find you straddling jae with your fingers in his hair
i’m telling you they don’t even PAUSE in their steps they just look at you and acknowledge it
and then brian just …. takes a seat next to you guys and is like
“are y’all done i wanna watch this redbox movie and return it tonight before i gotta pay for another day”
you’re both cherry red in the face and untangle yourselves in astonishment at his casual tone
dowoon is rummaging around in your fridge and calls out from the kitchen that the two of you were the most obvious people on the planet and that the rest of the band was in the same boat as wonpil they just weren’t absolute psychos
wonpil: this is true but i resent that
all of you settle back into a comfortable dynamic
you’re super happy that your relationship with jae didn’t make anything weird
it probably helped that the very first night that jae mentioned in passing that you were cute and the band had never let it go since
it also probably helped when wonpil pointed out your actual literal heart eyes the first time you saw jae
……………. they were just waiting for it to happen tbh
anyways
nowadays you spend your mornings parting ways with a kiss and your evenings snuggled up together on the couch exchanging eskimo kisses and sweet nothings and you couldn’t be happier
<3
29 notes · View notes
michaelmilkers · 6 years
Note
what is it, exactly, that your 'friends' were angry with u about? i dont want to be invasive and u can ignore this ask, i just think that altho im leaning in ur favor i dont want to decide whether or not to continue supporting you without all of the data. i.e., you could be saying something wildly racist, or you could have insulted someones dog. obviously completely different things that merit completely different responses. i can message you if u dont want to share with the general public :)
putting it under a cut
this
i said in the blacklist chat about a month ago “is circumcision common in latinos” for a thing i was writing which was not only something i couldve googled (which i ended up doing) but also incredibly poor phrasing and i apologized
i was sometimes too open about sexual topics in the nsfw chat (which was 16+) because i was under the impression everyone was okay with it because no one ever really told me it was tmi (sometimes i put stuff in general that i didnt consider nsfw but other people considered nsfw but most of those times i deleted whatever it was i said/sent) (also for the record i had a general rule against sending irl porn in the nsfw chat and so i never did that aside from like the first few months of the servers existence where i was still trying to figure out how to go about having a server at all)
there was a “jewish” role in the server that some jewish people in the server asked for but apparently some people were uncomfortable with the fact that there was a jewish role but not roles for other ethnicities or minorities. people communicated this to me and i was going to make other roles but hadnt gotten around to it yet when everything went down bc spoons
i wasnt open enough about the reasons why i banned people (which only happened a couple times) so people assumed i was only banning them because they disagreed with me, which wasnt true
i have a habit of publicly (i.e. on the blog) responding to criticism with passive aggression or jokes, something im aware of and actively working on, and its something i dont do in private conversation because i dont think its productive, in fact one of my rules in the server was not to respond to disagreements or arguments or discourse with reaction gifs or emotes or memes or stuff like that. 
and this is the biggest incident, tw for genital mutilation and nsfw discussion, and its a long one so bear with me:
basically in december i mentioned in the nsfw chat that i happened to come across a video of a woman essentially sewing her vagina shut. i did not send the video and did not describe it in graphic detail. i shouldnt have brought it up at all, but this was another case of me thinking something wasnt that bad but it upset a few other people. because of the nature of the video the most i will say about it is that it was not a permanent thing, it was done with sterile medical-grade stuff, and it was a masochism thing rather than like actually permanently mutilating the vagina. i was browsing around the internet going down various rabbit holes out of boredom and i came across this video, i did not search for this kind of thing, i just watched it out of curiosity.
anyways, some people were upset by it, i apologized for mentioning it and that was kind of that. but then the next day i received an anonymous ask calling me a freak whos into genital mutilation so i copied the ask in the blacklist chat (tagging it any time i mentioned the video in any level of detail) and basically what then happened that night was that i received multiple anons over the course of a couple hours calling me a freak and greatly exaggerating what happened. i would post the ask in the blacklist chat, me and a couple other people would talk about what was said, and then i would get another anon or two about it.
from the start i did not take the anons seriously because like, youre fucking liveblogging a conversation YOURE IN in my inbox, and i stated multiple times that if they wanted to have a serious conversation about it they could dm me or bring it up in the server because i was not going to entertain this back and forth bullshit.
i called the anon a clown and they sent clown emojis in response, which is when it kind of started getting out of control. me and a lot of other people in the server were making fun of the anon and joking about it calling them “clown anon” and stuff. and then the anon sent an ask containing the sentence “do u really want to be on the team of the guy who watches pussy sewing for fun!” (directed at everyone else in the server joking with me) and i thought the phrase “pussy sewing” was fucking HILARIOUS so everyone started making pussy sewing jokes and calling the anon clussy anon and saying shit like “pussy sewing sunday” (bc this was happening on a sunday night) and “pussy sewing club” and shit like that.
i said multiple times during this that i was not making fun of the video or the subject matter i was making fun of the anon(s) and their dramatic bullshit, but some people didnt believe me ig. at the time i was maintaining the opinion that as long as its all sterile and there is no permanent damage then stuff like that is fine and its none of my business what people do to their own bodies, which i still kind of agree with? im not super sure.
but anyway a few people thought i was a shitty person because of this, one of these people left and the other two said they were going to leave so i banned them, one person was very upset by the subject matter and wanted to take a break from the server, i told them sorry about the situation and to be safe. when one of my mods came online and saw what happened she was very upset about the fact that people had left and i didnt really listen to what she was saying (something ive apologized for since then) but said that for the sake of the person taking a break this was to never be brought up again. i agreed and asked my other mod to delete the conversation because i was low on spoons at the time, they said sure and deleted it for me (and during on the incident on friday this person told everyone that i “made them” delete the messages and that they were too afraid to say no to me and it was disgusting) and that was the last time the situation was brought up until this weekend.
i had actually learned from the situation, both about the things i bring up and also the content i look at even out of boredom or curiosity, and the ethics of that, and i have since then not looked at anything like that online. the people in my server were not aware of this because i was told to never bring it up again, so i didnt, and no one brought it up to me privately so i assumed people werent upset about it anymore. so they assumed i didnt care or i was still looking at shit like that and just wasnt talking about it. i had absolutely no idea people were still harboring bad feelings about this incident and if i did i wouldve apologized again and told them about how i had learned from the situation. i explained all of this on saturday and nobody seemed to care.
multiple times during the situation this weekend i said that their criticisms are valid and tried to explain myself and apologize and own up to what i did, but apparently because im mad about them bullying me and getting people to raid the server im not actually sorry?? according to them.
which is more of them just trying to gaslight me and manipulate me into thinking this is all my fault and i deserved it instead of that event being fucking bullshit.
one person said “your criticisms are valid but the way you brought them up isnt” or something like that in quotation marks in an attempt to mock me but like,,, yeah thats exactly what im saying lmao.
so yeah thats basically it? those are the main things. sorry this got so long.
11 notes · View notes