#i didn't think i'd edit this in time today lmao i've been distracted by basketball

[kimvtae]

Drag Me Down (To Hell) | 03

↬ Summary: There’s a darkness to your city, a murderous underbelly filled with crime and deceit that you’ve sworn to avoid at all costs. But the universe has funny ways of forcing your involvement in the form of a notorious mob boss and his young daughter. ↬ Pairing: Jeongguk x reader ↬ Genre: mafia!au ↬ Rating: Mature (for themes; subject to change in later chapters) ↬ Word Count: 11.534

Part 01 - Part 02 - Part 04 - Part 05

You don’t sleep that night.

After Jeongguk had pushed Surin into your arms and slammed your front door, his footsteps echoing loudly throughout the building as he left, the young girl had promptly fallen back asleep with her face nestled against your neck. You hadn’t been able to move for what might have been an hour, staring at the door in muted shock before finally regaining yourself to get Surin into your bed to sleep for the rest of the night, and then calling Jeongguk.

There was no answer, of course. You really hadn’t expected one. But there was no answer on the burner phone Jimin had given you the number to, or on Taehyung’s phone, or even Jimin’s. And Jimin had promised you he’d always answer your calls if he could.

Still, you force yourself not to overreact. Criminals always faced scares, were always encountering threats and needing to leave for covert reasons. With Surin in the picture you could imagine it had been nearly impossible for Jeongguk to up and leave, to chase down people who tested him in different countries. Maybe that was another unseen effect of holding this job- keeping a goddam child safe while her father created trouble around Asia.

When sleep proves to be futile and you’re unable to catch a wink even curled up around Surin’s tiny frame, (she’s shivering, you realize belatedly, grabbing the afghan from the hall closet to drape over her body,) you hesitantly decide to open Surin’s backpack. Maybe by seeing what Jeongguk had packed in her bag you could get an idea as to how long Jeongguk would be gone, or even what he’d left to do.

It wasn’t any help. Surin’s bag was packed as if she wouldn’t be home for weeks. You had to admit the sight was impressive, what with how many outfits Jeongguk’s managed to fit in the bag, along with a sturdy pair of sneakers. Dollars, Won, Euros, and Yen notes are tucked into the inside pockets, enough cash of each for a small family to survive for at least two months. There’s a Taser at the bottom that you quickly throw into the highest cabinet in the kitchen, but what chilled your blood the most was the envelope in the front pocket of the bag, stuffed with official passports of ten different countries, all with aliases for Surin. Only the Korean one had her real name, and even then it wasn’t Jeongguk’s surname on the documents.

“Oh, Jeon,” you whisper, irrationally afraid that Surin may overhear. You hurriedly repack the bag the way you’d found it. “What have you gotten yourself into?”

“Eonnie?”

You startle, placing the envelope back in the backpack and letting the whole thing drop to the floor. Surin stands in the doorway to your bedroom, hair messy and sticking out in every direction as she rubs her eyes. The blanket is still around her shoulders, but you get a peak at the Iron Man pajamas she’s wearing.

“Hey, kid,” you say slowly, watching Surin stumble her way over to join you on the couch. “Don’t you want to get some more sleep?”

Surin shakes her head. “Where’s daddy?”

Fuck, you really should have been expecting that question. You school your expression into something you hope is neutral enough not to alarm her. “He’s running some errands. I’m not sure when he’ll get back.”

Sighing, Surin slumps on the couch. She props her chin on her fist, staring blankly at the backpack on the floor, and you’re struck, not for the first time, at how she looks too young to be so tired. “He’s gone, isn’t he?”

“Yeah,” you breathe. “He’ll be back soon, though, right?”

“Last time daddy left, he had to leave me with the maid.”

“Is that why you’re scared of them?”

“They have guns, eonnie.”

“What-? Why do they have-?” No, fuck, you were not having this conversation with a child, but you would bring it up with Jeongguk when he got home. Instead, you say, “Never mind. There’s cereal in the pantry if you want some.”

“Marshmallow cereal?” Surin asks, a smile betraying what you can’t imagine she’s feeling inside.

“Mhm.”

“Daddy never lets me have marshmallow cereal!”

You take a quick shower after settling Surin in front of the TV with a big bowl of cereal, taking the opportunity to try to call Jeongguk again, but there was still no answer. Not even a text from Taehyung. You collect your books from your room, finding Surin writing in her notebook, focused more on writing than on the cartoon playing on screen.

“Is your school done for the year?”

“Yep!”

Finals were in two weeks. You really couldn’t afford to skip. “Do you want to come to classes with eonnie today?”

“Okay.”

Your professors, unsurprisingly, were very understanding about Surin staying during class time. You introduce Surin as your daughter, saying there was an issue with your usual daycare and figuring it would fit best with Jimin’s story if anything were to happen. So Surin sits in on your classes with her notebook in one hand and a snack you’d packed in the other. Some students coo at her at the little café you stop at for lunch, but she takes it all in stride, smiling and laughing and talking about the dog she hopes she’ll get for her birthday.

That night while brushing teeth, Surin asks whether you’ve heard anything from Jeongguk, and when you say you haven’t she grows quiet for the first time since that morning. You promise to keep trying to contact him as you tuck her into your bed, but Surin shakes her head.

“If he hasn’t called, that means he can’t talk,” Surin says sleepily. “He probably threw his phone in the river before leaving Gangnam.”

“Surin don’t speak like that,” you say sharply.

She’s quiet for a few moments, turning her head away from your fingers in her hair. “Goodnight, eonnie.”

“Goodnight.”

“Wait,” she chokes out when your hand closes around the doorknob. Her voice shakes, and you know in that moment that there will never be anything you could deny this little girl. “Stay please?”

For the next five days there is no sign of or call from Jeongguk or any of his men. Even Bogum, your tail for the week, had no updates on his whereabouts, and advised you to stop asking about it. Instead, you keep bringing Surin to your classes and taking her out to dinner each night to get out of the apartment. Her face lights up at each childish restaurant you take her to, and you file keep every menu she draws on to give to Jeongguk when he returns. If Surin notices the cash or passports in her backpack she doesn’t comment on them, and you wonder if that was regular in her life.

On the sixth day, Surin asks if there are any parks nearby and you agree to take her to one after your classes let out. It’s your early day, but you have a question about one of your recent papers, climbing the stairs to the faculty offices with Surin’s hand in yours as she speaks excitedly about the dog she had seen earlier. Seemed Jeongguk wasn’t the only one in that house she was taking after.

“Excuse me, professor?” You knock on the door after settling Surin in one of the chairs outside. A man with unnaturally blond hair is in the room with your professor, looking pissed, if his bright red face and veined forehead were anything to go by, and there was a scar from the tip of his eyebrow that extended to the lid of his eye.

“Ah, Y/N,” your professor says, a warm smile on her lips. “Pardon us, Shin, but I have work to attend to.”

“Of course,” the man, Shin, says, giving you a quick once over before leaving the room.

“What can I do for you?”

“Right, uhm. My essay…”

Your nerves are still a little on edge as you leave the room; frown deep on your lips. A stranger on campus really shouldn’t have this kind of affect on you, but you were paranoid after what had happened at Surin’s school and from Jeongguk’s disappearance. Sue you for being worried.

“Hey, kid. Ready to go to… to the park-?” But the chair you had left Surin in was empty, her backpack knocked over onto the floor and no sign of her dark hair on either side of the hallway. “Surin? Surin!”

You look in every office in the area, shouting Surin’s name with each door you open. Holding her backpack, your chest threatens to concave. You were in the office for maybe five minutes; the only other person in the immediate area was the man speaking with your professor before you. Had you misjudged him? Had you seen him around, maybe at the park or Surin’s school beforehand? Fuck, you had learned to be so careful over the last few months and now Surin was missing, Surin was missing and had been taken by the same men that wanted Jeongguk dead, the same men who had no qualms with torturing a small child to get the information they needed-

"Eonnie?"

You whirl at the sound, sweet, sweet relief flooding your limbs at the sight of Surin, standing near one of the receptionist’s desks and staring up at you in confusion. Nearly sprinting to her side you fall to your knees, grabbing her arms and checking her legs, even going so far as to check for a wire before confirming that yes, she's alright, and no, Jeongguk won't have any reason to stage your elaborate death.

"Where did you go?" You demand, still checking Surin's neck for any signs of marks.

"I was in the bathroom! Eonnie, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," you breathe. "Nothing. Let's go back to the apartment now."

Surin takes her backpack from you, still glancing at you as you lead her out of the administration building and back toward the bus stop. When she seems to recognize where it is you're headed, she tugs on your sleeve, staring up at you with wide, watery brown eyes. God damn Jeongguk's genes. "What about the park?"

"Not today," you say. "I- uh, I have a lot of homework. We'll go on Sunday." What you failed to mention was how you were still a little paranoid. Especially with Jeongguk MIA, there was no telling who may come out of the woodwork when he wasn't around to defend his turf, when there wasn’t anyone around to keep track of you and Surin.

God, you scoff, sitting on the bus with Surin on your lap. When had your life become a trashy spy movie plot?

Once home, you settle Surin at the table with a snack and a Chinese language workbook you'd picked up the other day, after recognizing that she hadn't been studying her languages since Jeongguk dropped her off. There were four others piled on your bed for Mandarin, English, and French. You realize with a start, digging through your clothes for something more comfortable to change into, that Jeongguk was preparing her in case she ever had to disappear.

You look out of your bedroom, catching sight of Surin's frame bent over the table. She was working diligently, humming to herself as she wrote. She was such a young, beautiful child, but one wrong move from Jeongguk or anyone else that lived in that house, and her entire life would be turned upside down. Whereas other children were enjoying their vacations with family and friends, Surin was studying languages for the possibility of fleeing the country. Men with guns showed up at her school. Her father disappeared with illegal business more often than not. This pretty, tiny little child with night hair rivaling the blackness of Jeongguk's, wide eyes, and a mind that knew more than she let on, should not be bred for a life of secrecy.

"Surin?"

"Yeah, eonnie?" She turns to face you, open and trusting, and your heart catches in your throat.

"I'll order in dinner tonight. Want pizza?"

"Sure!"

You'd stopped calling Jeongguk a few days ago, stopped trying to get information when there clearly wasn't any. And while you were still insanely worried, you tried not to show it for Surin's sake. Instead, you rented Surin's favorite Disney movie and the two of you ate pizza on the floor of your tiny living room, giggling and singing along to the songs. And you hope, beyond all reason that you've managed to distract the young girl.

Bedtime at your apartment is so different from that at Jeongguk's estate. There, sometimes, you have to wait for one of his men to finish in the bathroom before you can get Surin in there, and sometimes it's difficult to get Jeongguk's men to keep quiet after she's put to bed. But at your place, there's no lines or guns, just laughing and dancing, brushing teeth and making soap mustaches. Tucking Surin into bed meant several stories with the little girl sitting propped against your chest and her gaze focused intently on the book, asking questions and pointing out plot holes. In children's books. The fuck.

When Surin's finally asleep you actually look at your homework, at the two final exam projects you have due in the next two weeks. With a sigh, you rub tiredly at your eyes, deciding to get started now before Surin would wake and ask for a trip to the park again.

There's a knock at your door as the time snails towards three in the morning, the rest of the world smartly choosing to go the fuck to sleep. There's no hurry or fury to this knocking, as if this were the middle of the afternoon and a friend were waiting for you on the other side. Still, you sneak as silently as possible to the door, checking the peephole with bated breath and letting out a relieved noise when you get a look at who's on the other side and hurrying to pull the door open.

"Jeongguk.”

"Hey, Y/N. Sorry."

There's blood on Jeongguk's face, blood you hadn't been able to see through the peephole. It's dried, cracked in some places along his forehead and cheek. His gun is carelessly hung in the waistband of his slacks, black hair a mess with what you don't even bother hoping isn't blood. His clothes are a little torn and he looks absolutely exhausted, as if he hadn't slept in three days, or for the entire week he's been away.

For a second, you're floored, speechless as you stare at Jeongguk across the threshold. And then the surprise wears off. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" You hiss, yanking him into your apartment with a fist curled in the front of his jacket. "Do you have any idea how worried Surin has been? She's a smart fucking girl, Jeongguk, she isn't immune to what you do."

"I know," Jeongguk says, raising his hands in front of his body and for a minute, he looks so much younger, and the worry he must have been feeling for his daughter for the last few days shows in the cracks of blood on his cheeks, in the muted colors in his eyes. "I know. And I'm so, so sorry for asking you to watch her on such short notice. I wouldn't have done it if I had any other choice."

"I'm not going to ask for an explanation right now," you say. Jeongguk glances into your apartment, searching for something, but you stop him with a hand on his chest before he can make his way past you.

"Y/N-"

"You're not going in there covered in blood, Jeongguk." You guide him through your apartment, placing a few towels on the bathroom sink. "You'll give Surin nightmares with all that blood on your face, you damn idiot. Shower. She's okay. My room's at the end of the hall, feel free to it once you've finished."

Jeongguk sighs, bloodshot eyes trained on the floor. "Thank you, Y/N. I have no idea how I'll make this up to you."

You smile gently. "Take Surin to the park tomorrow."

As Jeongguk showers you set to work cleaning up your things, packing away your schoolwork and the salvageable parts of one of your projects. While the water's still running you dial Taehyung's number, a little pissed when it goes straight to voicemail again, but deciding not to do anything of it until you see Taehyung again. There's always an explanation.

"We ditched our phones in Ilsan," Jeongguk says, startling you into dropping your phone onto the floor of the kitchen. He chuckles, drying his hair with the towel. He'd changed back into his slacks and undershirt, and you flush when you realize you didn't have anything in the apartment to give him. "Oh, shit. If it's damaged, I'll buy you another one."

"It's fine."

"Right. Anyway, I'm sure you were calling, but we threw our phones away as soon as we realized things were going south in Ilsan. I'm sure Taehyung's trying to find an open store right now to buy a phone to call you on."

"Jeongguk." You're tired and spent, and namely still a little upset by the entire week. Taehyung will get to you. You're not worried about that. "Go to Surin, please."

Jeongguk leaves for your room, leaving the door open and you finish tidying up the apartment. Cleaning dishes that have been there for days, re-packing Surin's backpack, and straightening up the bathroom a little, but as you pass the door to your room you pause. You'd fallen into the habit of either sleeping in the same bed as Surin if she asked you to stay, or checking on her a few times during the night if you were sleeping on the couch. And it's always the same; she's curled into all of the blankets, clutching the little toy dog she loves so dearly, and if she's shivering then you throw another blanket over her slim frame.

Tonight, not to your surprise, is different. Jeongguk is a little too big for your bed, but that doesn't stop him from curling up into it, stroking his fingers through Surin's hair with a practiced touch. She startles awake, but settles right away when she realizes that it's Jeongguk that woke her. The grin that splits the little girl's cheeks is breathtaking as she shoves herself into Jeongguk's embrace, surely burying her face in his chest. You can't hear what they're saying, but you can imagine Jeongguk's whispering something to her as he settles more fully on the bed, arms around her body.

The sight knocks your breath away, a feeling of longing so severe that your chest aches and your features begin to crumble under the weight of the smile. Something like that is all you've ever wanted and yet, it's all you've never been able to have. All you'll never be able to have.

Quietly, you shut the door to your bedroom and retreat to the couch, sinking into the cushions just as your phone vibrates in your hand. You don’t recognize the number, but you’re quick to answer.

“Love?”

“Taehyung.” A sob bubbles in the back of your throat at the soothing sound of Taehyung’s voice. You never realized how desperately you could miss someone until the chance of death was so high.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t call.”

“Don’t. I know why you couldn’t.”

Taehyung’s quiet for a long moment, but just knowing he’s alive and breathing is enough not for you to prompt him to keep speaking. “Y/N, why are you still awake?”

“Jeongguk’s here,” you say, wrapping yourself in an extra blanket on the back of the couch and lying down. “He’s with Surin. I don’t think I can sleep tonight.”

“You should try. There’s going to be a lot of info being explained in the next few days.”

“Just. Tell me anything important you can. You know I don’t like details.”

“Love, I’m starting to think that’s not the best idea anymore.” Taehyung sighs, exhaustion creeping into his voice and curling along your limbs. “Our shipments are being attacked. We got an alert of an attack and went to stop it, but when we got there, they weren’t any of our suspects. None of Zhang’s men, none of Keng’s. We lost five guys.”

“Jimin-?”

“He’s alive. Nearly lost a finger but Seokjin-hyung’s almost done stitching him back together.”

Taehyung’s words are starting to trip over themselves in the way his voice gets when he’s been awake for three days straight, when his body begs him for nothing more than sleep. He’s trying to fight through it, to keep updating you about what had happened. All of the men had been wearing masks, they had no leads on who it could have been, and Jeongguk’s first order of business upon getting back to Seoul had been getting back to his daughter. The rest could wait.

“Taehyung,” you murmur, interrupting a slurred monologue about which drugs had been stolen. “Go to sleep.”

“Mm, you, too.” Taehyung yawns. “I’ll cuddle Jimin back to health all night. Tell Jeongguk to get his ass back here first thing in the morning. I miss his kid.” You laugh quietly, even as the stone in your belly continues to sink, ripples making even your toes feel heavy and uncomfortable. “Get some rest, love.”

“Goodnight, Tae.”

There are no sounds from your bedroom, and you figure it’s safe to assume that Jeongguk’s fallen asleep around Surin. Still, sleep doesn’t come immediately to you, and you reach blindly for the remote before turning on the first show you could find. It’s an infomercial for chrome curtains, the host gesturing comically with no sound on the TV. They’re ugly and unnecessary, but at least the pictures do a decent job of pushing your thoughts from your head until your eyes finally close for the night.

"What do you think about Beijing?"

You tickle Surin's toes as the swing nears you, her bubbling laugh infectious and adorable. Jeongguk stands behind her, pushing the swing each time she gets close enough. "Like. Politically or for a vacation?"

"I was thinking vacation," Jeongguk says with a smile. "But I am wholly interested in your political views."

"Oh, bite me."

Jeongguk laughs, and after a few seconds Surin joins in again. It had been almost a month since Jeongguk disappeared for a week, and though you still didn't know that whole story, things had at least settled down a little. And now that you were out of school you were spending nearly everyday at Jeongguk's estate to watch after Surin. Most days you used her coursework time to keep looking into universities for graduate school, Taehyung hovering excitedly over your shoulder until he was called back to do his job.

"I mean," Jeongguk says, after a few minutes. "I don't even know why I asked about Beijing. It's irrelevant right now."

"Tell that to the people of Beijing."

"I will if you do."

"Daddy, I want to go on the slide!" Surin kicks her feet to make her point, trying to grasp your hands to bring the swing to a stop.

He laughs again, and you instantly see Surin's smile on his own face. "Okay, princess."

Jeongguk helps her out of the swing, and she runs toward the biggest slide the second her feet touch the ground. You and Jeongguk follow at a slower pace, neither of you taking your eyes off her. Yugyeom was your tail today, standing on the other side of the playground. There was no sign of the people who'd been here the first time or the person who'd threatened you, but still your breathing was a little uneasy every time you scanned your surroundings.

"Why do you ask about not Beijing, anyway?"

"Ah, I need to ask you a favor." Jeongguk gestures to a spot underneath one of the trees to stand, the few leaves still hanging on to the branches were brown and burnt. "I need to go to Taiwan in two weeks, and I wanted to ask you to accompany me."

"Why?"

Jeongguk looks away to where Surin's waving from the top of the slide, smile wide and bright. You and Jeongguk both wave back, that achingly fond look back in Jeongguk's eyes, almost as if it had never left.

"I want you there?"

You snort. "Shouldn't I just stay here with her? I'm already at your place most days each week."

Jeongguk's expression hardens, and suddenly you remember Taehyung had mentioned Jeongguk had crafted and burnt an alias just for what happened in Ilsan. Things were getting serious, and it seemed Jeongguk was still intent to keep you in the dark. But could you complain? It was what you had asked for, after all. "I don't want to leave the country without her right now. After what happened in the last couple months, I don't want to leave her alone. You're someone she trusts wholeheartedly, and I know that you can help me keep her out of trouble out there."

"Are you expecting trouble in Taiwan?"

"No," Jeongguk says. "So, I'm telling her it's a vacation. That way she doesn't worry when we get there. What do you say, Y/N?"

You sigh, glancing back to Surin. She's moved on to the monkey bars now, hanging upside down between two of the bars and laughing a full belly laugh. You really didn't like the idea of leaving the country and watching Surin somewhere else, somewhere you don’t trust to not be full of the same danger you were facing here. Jeongguk said he didn't expect any disaster, but the nature of his work was centered in uncertainty. Things can go wrong at any moment.

"I don't have a passport," you say, conceding your consent. If he was telling Surin this was a vacation, then dammit, you'd treat it as a vacation. Maybe get Jeongguk to pay for a ferry ride or something to treat Surin to.

"Uhm," Jeongguk coughs. When you look at him again, he's grinning embarrassedly, bangs falling into his eyes in a way that de-ages him significantly. "Yes, you do?"

"Let me guess." You barely manage to hold back your groan. Even trying so hard to avoid this world, the stage had been set for so long for you to take your place. "Taehyung?"

"Will saying sorry help?

"Absolutely not."

Your passport is, you have to admit, skillfully made. The glossy cover and pristine pages inside make it look almost official. In fact, Jeongguk promises you that Taehyung insisted your passport be real. You’re not sure if it’s official, but you are sure that if Jeongguk’s fake paperwork has been working for this long, then yours can be cleared, too.

Surin adores her passport, giggling at the picture of her. Her name is Park Surin on this one, and you briefly consider asking Jeongguk if any of her documentations have her real name, but decide against it. He's been busy finalizing the plans for leaving for Taiwan, deciding which men to bring along and who to leave at home. He doesn't say it, but part of you believes he's leaving a certain number behind as a front.

"I'm not so sure about this," you say, as Taehyung approaches you in the kitchen, your suitcase in one hand and his in the other. The fridge is covered in colored and scribbled on menus.

"Me neither. But boss's orders and all that jazz." Taehyung had not been pleased to learn Jeongguk had asked you to tag along on this business trip, had even interrupted Jeongguk's meeting to confront him about it, but had finally stopped screaming when you had told him, in your own words, that you had chosen to do this for Surin.

"Do you think Surin's nervous?"

Taehyung runs a hand through his hair, tilting his chin to lead you through the house and looking more exhausted than you could remember him being in the recent months. Since the Ilsan incident, Jeongguk's entire estate had been on heightened alert, which meant more guns and more security and less time for rest. Now, standing on the driveway, you're watching as a select few of Jeongguk's men pack two cars. Jeongguk stands on the front steps, speaking with Jimin as Surin enthusiastically chases Yugyeom around the pair.

"No," Taehyung finally says. "She's a tough kid. Life sucks, but she's strong. Plus she has no fucking clue what this vacation is a front for."

"A front?"

Taehyung's eyes widen, his lips falling shut immediately. "Fuck, okay, you deserve to know. Jeongguk's got a meeting in Taiwan with an old family friend. Other than that, he expects absolutely nothing to happen over the next four days. Maybe we can trick him into a big dinner."

"We can tell the wait staff it's Surin's birthday."

"Love, you're a damn genius." Taehyung kisses your forehead before grabbing the suitcases again and taking them to the first car.

Jeongguk finishes his conversation with Jimin, both men looking a little peeved, but he schools the expression when Surin runs barreling into his arms with a squeal. Jimin was not very happy about staying behind this week, but he needed to let the stitches in his hand from the stabbing in Ilsan properly heal. Your stomach is in knots, both from watching how excited Surin is and from Taehyung's news. Jeongguk has a meeting, huh? You couldn't help but wonder why Jeongguk felt so threatened just by a meeting that he asked you to tag along to another country.

But you don't ask. You don't ask because even if you've been working for Jeongguk for months now, your only place here is to care for Surin. Anything that doesn't pertain to her isn't any of your business, and you know it would do you good to remember that.

"Are we set to go?" Jeongguk directs the question at Bogum as he approaches; Surin balanced on his hip and both arms around her body. She always looks so extra tiny against Jeongguk’s wide frame. "Flight's in a few hours."

"All set, boss," Bogum confirms. "Just give Taeyong the new security password and we'll be ready to go."

"Remind me to get a new system when we get home, Bogum. It's been a few months with this one."

"Sure thing, boss."

The flight goes off without a hitch. You'd be lying if you said you weren't nervous going through security, terrified out of your mind that one of the officers would find a flaw with your passport and you'd be detained, that Jeongguk would be recognized beneath his mask and cap and then you'd be arrested, but that didn't happen. Even as you sweated a little too much going through the metal detectors, nothing happened. And almost before you could blink, you were seated next to Taehyung on the plane.

"Why don't you take a private plane?" You blurt, just before takeoff. Jeongguk, sitting with Surin in the row next to you, laughs quietly.

"Too conspicuous, Y/N."

It's warm in Taiwan when the plane touches down, but it doesn't take long to get through customs before the entire group- consisting of you, Jeongguk, Surin, Taehyung, and ten more of Jeongguk's men- is split into separate black cars waiting by the doors. You're tired, dozing off on Taehyung's shoulder as you're driven deep into the city. You've always had trouble sleeping on flights and you're hoping this meeting doesn't happen for at least a day or two so you can sleep off the flight.

Surin lies on Jeongguk's lap, propped up in his arms and resting her head against his neck, snoring quietly. You hope Jeongguk's picked out some nice places to take her over the next few days.

The hotel is small, surprisingly. Only a few stories high and not as impressive as you had expected it to be. Then again, you realize as Jeongguk checks everyone in by speaking shaky Chinese, that this is exactly why Jeongguk had chosen it. Your room is on the second floor between Jeongguk's and Taehyungs.

When you're standing before your respective doors, Jeongguk still carrying a sleeping Surin, Jeongguk nods to you. "Meet me for breakfast in the morning. I'll explain what I need you to do for Surin then. Oh, and Y/N? Expect a raise after this."

You wave off his comment. "You know that's not necessary, Mister Jeon."

"Goodnight, miss Y/N."

Taehyung blows you a kiss before disappearing into his room, and despite your exhaustion sleep doesn't come easily to you that night. Maybe it's the unfamiliar bed, or the extreme heat inside the hotel room, or your nerves betraying the calm you'd felt throughout the day, but you find yourself tossing and turning all night, even getting up at four in the morning and ordering room service. The selection isn't expansive, but they have pretty breakfast foods and you ask the man who takes your order to charge it to Jeongguk's bill, but after eating you're not hungry in the morning.

"Eat, Y/N, we have a long day." Surin's sitting at another table between Bogum and Taehyung, coloring with a marker on the back of Taehyung's hand. Jeongguk had asked to sit with you at a smaller table in the corner to explain a few things.

"I'll eat more later," you say, nibbling on a piece of toast. "Just. Jeon, please let me know what the fuck is going on. This relates to Ilsan, doesn't it?"

"Yes," Jeongguk says. "We received footage of the Zhangs moving toward one of my bases out there, where Namjoon was located at the time. When we got there, we were ambushed. But not by Zhang's men, like we expected. We don't know who these people are, but they were smart enough to hack into our digital system and place the footage we wanted to see, while being able to monitor our movements. That's why we abandoned our phones, Y/N, so they couldn't keep an eye on us as we fought back. It took five days to neutralize all of them, but when we began interrogating the suspect we'd caught, he killed himself with a cyanide capsule he'd been keeping in his mouth. Taeyong’s overhauling our entire system while we’re away and scanning any footage we’ve got to try and get a peek at one of their faces under the masks. Bunny masks. How fucking childish."

Jeongguk sighs, leaning back in his chair and glancing over at Surin. He's got one arm balanced on his bent knee, twirling a packet of fake sugar between his fingers, a frown on his lips. You tear at the crust of your toast. "Do you think these people are connected to those who threatened Surin?" And me?

"I think it's likely," Jeongguk admits. "There are... a lot of people who want to see me dead, you know. If these aren't the same people who're willing to go after my daughter to break me, then it's someone else I've pissed off over the last few years. Someone who's amassed a lot of muscle that isn't afraid to die for his cause."

"Is that what you're trying to find out today?"

"No. Today is a meeting with a man named Jackson Wang. I've known him my entire life, and his father was a good friend with my own. I'm hoping he can give me information on a few men who've been giving me trouble. Oh," Jeongguk snaps his fingers, dropping the packet of sugar onto the floor. "And on a shipment of weapons that's been severely delayed. I should be using a new pistol, not this stupid old thing."

Thankfully, Jeongguk does not reveal his gun, only thumbs at it over his waistband. "Okay. So, what do I need to do with Surin?"

"Keep her occupied all day. I don't know how long this meeting is going to go for, but I outlined a few of Taiwan's best places to visit, a few places to give her a chance to practice her Chinese. I don't want Jackson or any of his men to know she's here. I don't want anyone to know she's here."

"Don't you trust this guy?"

"I trust him with my life, but that doesn't mean I trust the people he chooses to trust."

You rub at your temples a little petulantly. "God, I hate your job."

Jeongguk chuckles humorlessly. "Doesn't get much better, Y/N, I can promise you that."

"And what do I tell Surin when she asks why her father isn't spending time with her on the first day of vacation?"

"Tell her we have all of tomorrow to make up for lost time."

You accompany Jungkook to the building where the meeting will be taking place, a gorgeous office building in the center of the city, nestled above a beautiful restaurant that Jeongguk promises Surin they'll eat in together tomorrow evening. Bogum stays on the first floor, Taehyung on the second, the rest of Jeongguk's men disperse around the office.

The office is quiet, a few people sitting at computers throughout the rooms, but other than an annoyingly cheerful receptionist, there's very little movement on the fifth floor. It unnerves you a little, seeing so few bodies in the office on a workday. You imagine Jeongguk and Jackson had chosen a slow day to do their business, but then again, both men were insanely powerful. They could agree to meet any other day of the week. Sunlight streams through the window, illuminating dust and dirt in any given corner of the office, and your assigned tail for the day stands just inside the door.

Jeongguk places Surin's hand in yours, smiling down at his daughter. "Are you going to be good for Y/N today, sweetheart?"

"Yes, daddy!"

"Good. If I get a glowing report," Jeongguk says, holding both hands to his mouth as if to hide what he was saying from you. "I might just have to take you out for ice cream after dinner."

Surin gasps excitedly, her pigtails swinging with the motion. "Pinky promise?"

"Pinky promise." Jeongguk extends his hand to Surin, and as he links his pinky finger with hers the door to the floor slams open.

"Ah, Park Jeongguk."

Jeongguk stiffens, whirling on his heel in such a way as to hide Surin from view, but it's clear his efforts aren't enough. Who you assume to be Jackson Wang steps into the room, bleached hair looking almost green in the poor fluorescent lighting. His smile is wide, his expression kind, but you have enough experience with these kinds of men to know that he's hiding something behind the smile, that he could probably kill you seven different ways just for looking at him wrong.

"Jackson," Jeongguk says, his own expression remaining neutral. You squeeze Surin's hand. "Ah, let's move quickly into the conference room."

"No need to rush, man," Jackson chuckles. His gaze falls onto Surin, who stands tall as she stares back at him. "I assume this is the kid? My godchild?"

"Yeah," Jeongguk says with a sigh. "Sorry, I would have introduced her to you sooner, but-"

"I know. You don't have to explain anything to me. How's Halla, by the way?"

Jeongguk's jaw clenches. "I wouldn't know."

For a long moment, Jackson is silent, appraising Jeongguk with a muted stare. Then, his gaze sweeps over the rest of the room, pausing on you for almost a minute before he smiles again. "Right. Let's get this show on the road, huh?"

As Jeongguk passes you, he whispers near your ear, "Get her out of this building. Now."

Jackson settles at the head of the table, Jeongguk rounding it to take the other seat. Surin tugs on your hand, and Yugyom’s giving you a look that says you need to go, Y/N, you need to go right now. Please.

Seating himself across from Jackson, Jeongguk takes a white envelope from his suit jacket and slides it across the table. You see Jackson unfold it, pulling a pen from his own jacket as he says something, lips moving to form words you can’t make out. Jeongguk remains impassive, but a smile curls his lips after a few moments, and his posture relaxes slightly.

Yugyeom moves to guard the door, jerking his head to the main door. You remember Jeongguk saying that he didn’t want anyone knowing Surin was in Taiwan, and suddenly your palms are sweaty as you squeeze Surin’s hand. The meeting seems to be going well, but you drag your eyes away from the sight of Jeongguk laughing quietly behind the flaps of a manila folder.

"Let's," you lick your dry lips, uncomfortable with watching Jeongguk in the conference room. You can't hear what they're saying, but Jeongguk does not look as angry as you had expected. Has the meeting even started? "Let's go, Surin-"

A red dot appears on Jackson's chest, standing out on the white dress shirt. Jeongguk freezes, his mouth opening to interrupt Jackson, and then a shot rings through the room.

Jackson drops facedown on the table.

The receptionist screams, every office worker scrambling to get to the front door as you crouch down, bringing Surin with you. You lose sight of Jeongguk. Glancing quickly around the room as more bullets begin to fly and glass shatters all around you, you spot a small closet at the end of a nearby hall.

"Daddy!" Surin screams, as gunshots continue to go off.

"Surin," you say desperately, grasping at the young girl's face with both hands. She's crying, tears streaking down her pretty cheeks, and the sight breaks your heart. "Surin, listen to me. We need to get to that closet, okay? Keep close to the floor and don't stop crawling."

"But, but daddy-"

"He's going to be okay. Right now we need to get you to safety."

You have no clue if there's any validity to your statement, if Jeongguk's even still alive, but he's stayed around this long, and you pray that it takes more than a few well placed gunshots to be the end of him. Pushing Surin toward the hall, she immediately crawls as quickly as she can; whimpering each time another gunshot goes off. From behind you, you can hear heavy footsteps ascending the stairs, and your heart rate kicks into overdrive, brow sweaty and mouth dry at the thought of losing Surin, of losing Jeongguk, Taehyung.

Opening the door to the closet, you urge Surin inside. Plaster is beginning to fall from the ceilings and walls and you really need to find Jeongguk. "Stay here," you tell Surin, instructing her to cover herself at the back of the closet, hidden from the view of the door. "Don't move until someone you know comes for you. Can you do that for me?"

"Eonnie..."

"I know," you whisper, flinching at a particularly close gunshot. "I'll come back soon, I promise."

You barricade the door with the nearest office chair, crouching as you run back to the mail area of the office. Jeongguk's standing by the reception desk, two guns aimed by the door, where three bodies lay motionless on the floor. There's a fourth body in the hall, your stomach twisting uncomfortably as you step over it.

"Jeongguk!"

"Y/N? What the fuck are you doing!"

A shot breaks the window behind the receptionist's desk, glass raining over yours and Jeongguk's bodies. Your arms get cut up a little as you block your face. You can't feel your heart, convinced in that moment that it absolutely jumped right out of your chest.

"Jeongguk, do you know these people?"

"That's not important! We need to get the fuck out of here! Where's Surin?"

"She's safe!" It takes a few long minutes to reach Jeongguk's side, debris and bodies making it difficult to move freely around the office. "Where-?"

Three quick gunshots ring from the floor downstairs, and Jeongguk curses again. "We need to get upstairs. There's probably some on the roof, but a fresh floor will at least give me places to attack from. Y/N." Jeongguk faces you, struggling with his thoughts for a moment before flipping one of the guns in his hand and offering it to you. "Finger off the trigger until you're ready to shoot. Kickback isn't too bad. You've got four bullets left. Safety is off. Let's get the fuck out of here."

You follow Jeongguk out of the room and up the nearest flight of stairs, letting him take the lead. It's no secret that you don't like guns, that you've never liked guns ever since the first time you saw one- when you were thirteen, shaking and scared hiding beneath the kitchen table, blood spilling over the pristine white tiles of the kitchen as they left you, they left you and they've never come home, stolen away before you got a good chance to get to know them- and the unfamiliar weight of the pistol in your hand settles like a weight in a shallow pond. Still, you hold it firmly, pointed at the ground, and focus on Jeongguk's back as he leads you up the stairs. Focus on your breathing, get to safety, and get Surin back to the hotel. That's everything you need to do.

"Jeongguk! Any sign of anyone?"

"No," Jeongguk hisses, back pressed to the wall. You've gone up three flights by now, wincing each time the two of you approached a corner, unsure if there were men with guns or dead bodies waiting for you on the other side. So far there have been neither, but the gunshots keep echoing from downstairs, the sounds of men shouting and muted thumps of bodies hitting the floor with chilling frequency. Jeongguk holds his gun by his chest, peaking around the corner before beckoning you forward. "And someone's jamming my frequency, I can't get through to Taehyung or Bogum."

Your heart stops, sudden images of Taehyung, laying in a pool of his own blood flood your mind. What if he was already dead? He was the last one you had, the only one left. You couldn't lose him. You couldn't. You couldn't lose anyone else. "You don't think they're-?"

"No," Jeongguk says, an air of finality to his tone. It does nothing to settle your stomach. From somewhere below, a beeping noise begins. "No, they're smart as hell. They're gonna survive this. But we won't if we just stay here chatting, Y/N, let's go!"

"Where?"

Jeongguk contradicts himself to say, "The roof. If no one's coming down that means they're not up there. Which means they initially attacked from a nearby building before swarming this one. If I can just get to the roof I can get visuals on the perimeter, see who the fuck we're working with."

"Okay," you breathe, trying desperately to catch your breath. You really don't like the feel of the gun in your hands. "I'll watch your back."

"Don't get shot."

"You too, Jeon."

A woman comes stomping down the next staircase Jeongguk leads you up, but before she even gets a chance to lift her gun a shot's ringing through the hallway, and she's crumpling to the floor, tumbling grotesquely down a few steps before her body comes to a stop. You shudder, but force yourself to keep walking, to keep moving on without sparing the woman a glance.

"Hey! You two!"

Someone shouts from below you and Jeongguk, a quick glance over the banister shows the man, whose face was covered by a black cloth, his bright red hair an unwelcome shock against the muted tones of the stairwell. He raises his gun, fires, and you feel the wind of the shot near your face as you quickly move away.

"Jeongguk-!"

From nearly a flight above you, Jeongguk leans over the railing and fires three quick shots, two of which strike directly in the man's chest. He slumps over the banister, unmoving. "Y/N!" Jeongguk shouts, snapping your attention away from the two bodies on the floor. "Grab one of their guns and keep moving!"

The woman's gun proves to have a full magazine, and Jeongguk curses in relief when you hand it over. "I was out of ammo," he admits. "That would have been bad."

The last staircase before the roof is darker than the others, and Jeongguk whispers for you to stay closer as he walks. His steps are light and certain, a stark contrast to your own shaky breathing and uneven steps. Anyone could be waiting around one of these corners, hiding where in the shadows, where monsters run free and death stalls for no one. Reaching a hand out, you curl your fingers in the back of Jeongguk's shirt, keeping the gun pointed behind you.

Sounds are muted now, each gunshot from below sounds too far away, and again you find yourself wondering if Surin's all right. If Taehyung was still alive. Wondering whom the fuck these people were and how they managed to find Jeongguk in a different country. But Jeongguk's approaching the door slowly, there's quiet shuffling behind you, and then bright light floods the small room as Jeongguk pushes the door open.

There's no one on the roof.

Jeongguk sweeps the roof, gun held in front of him as he checks all angles, breathing a sigh of relief when there are no other bodies. You're about to lower your gun, about to suggest finding a way back to Surin, when someone laughs from behind you, and Jeongguk's pointing his gun over your shoulder.

"Don't do anything stupid, Jeon," an unfamiliar voice says. An arm snakes around your neck and in your surprise you drop the gun, sending it clattering onto the gravel of the roof. The man behind you yanks you against his chest and suddenly there's the cold press of the barrel of a gun shoved right onto your temple, cold dread settling deep in your bones. "Wouldn't want this pretty little thing getting... hurt. Now would we?"

"Let her go." Jeongguk says, voice cold and collected, gun steadily aimed at the man's head behind you. You try to turn your head to look, but the man keeps you pinned, your nails digging into his forearm doing nothing to help yourself.

"Jeongguk..."

"I don't think I will," the man says, pushing the gun harder to your temple until you were whimpering in pain. "Unless. You tell me where your cute little daughter is hiding."

Jeongguk spits "Go to hell."

"I'll see you there."

"Who the fuck are you?" Jeongguk demands, clicking the safety off of his gun.

The man chuckles quietly, the sound reverberating painfully through your skull. More shots echo downstairs. More bodies thump to the ground. Your heart threatens to beat right out of your chest or give up on you right then and there.

"You don't recognize me, Jeonggukie?" The man sneers. "Don't recognize the man who taught you how to hold a gun?"

Jeongguk narrows his eyes. "Nice try, but Sangeul died when I was seven. Tell me who you are and who sent you, and maybe I'll let you live."

The man barks out a scathing laugh. "If you do, you're even dumber than we thought. We knew old man Jeon wasn't raising you right, but to raise a little bitch? Pathetic."

Jeongguk shows no signs he even heard what the man said, glare unwavering against the man. Beside your ear, you hear the safety of the man's gun clicking off. "You have ten seconds."

"Fuck you, Jeon-"

“Duck, Y/N.”

A shot rings out just as you drop your weight.

Your eyes fall shut, body taut in terror and breath held behind your clenched teeth, but pain never comes. Instead, the hold around your neck slackens, the gun leaves the side of your head, and the man falls back onto the ground with a hard thump.

Turning around, you spot a man who can't have been much older than Jeongguk, eyes wide and smirk still caught on his lips. A dot of red is centered on his forehead, blood blooming from the wound and trickling down the sides of the man's head like a polluted river, the sight turning your stomach. You were going to be sick.

"Did you...?"

You swallow heavily, blinking back tears as you back away from the body. Jeongguk steps closer to take his gun, cursing when he sees that the gun had been empty this entire time. You grab the gun you’d dropped earlier, hesitantly clicking the safety on again. He kicks the man back through the door to the roof, throwing it shut with a loud slam and chucking the useless gun off the side of the building.

"Fucking jackasses," Jeongguk mutters. "Should have killed them all when I had the chance."

"Did you know that man?"

"No," Jeongguk says, and when he looks back at you, the cold flame of anger in his eyes extinguishes slowly. "But I knew- wait, shit... Don't tell me that was the first death-"

"It wasn't," you snap. "Did you know him?"

"No, but he obviously knew me. Or at least, he knew my father." Jeongguk groans, running hand through his hair in frustration. He slips his gun back into the waistband of his pants, holding his hand out for yours, and you sigh in relief once it's out of your fingers. "We need to get to Surin and contact Taehyung. I can have a plane chartered out of here in less than four hours."

Jeongguk inspects the ground where the man's gun had fallen, as if the disrupted gravel may give him a clue as to who's been making all of the threats. Dissatisfied, he begins scanning the perimeter, checking between the ground and the buildings across from the office.

"There," he says suddenly, on the other side of the roof from you. "I can just see the sniper set up. That must have been where they shot Ja- where they shot Wang from."

"Jeongguk, I'm sorry-"

"Attachments kill, Y/N. I'm most sorry for Jackson's wife."

He keeps scanning the area, drawing his gun again at one point and aiming it toward the ground, but he doesn't fire it. Jeongguk mouths something to himself before re-joining you by the air conditioning duct. You can't hear anything going on in the office anymore, but you can hear police sirens and shouting coming from the streets, terrified screams from those whose family or loved ones had been working in the building that day.

"Jeongguk, we should-"

The grate to the vents of the roof bursts open, blasted clean off the roof from the force of the explosion. Dust swirls around your bodies, your vision temporarily impeded as you cough, gravel and dirt lodging itself in your throat. You reach out for Jeongguk, your hand brushing his elbow briefly before you freeze, and your breath catches harshly in your throat.

Five people storm out of the vent, taking advantage of the dust and- fuck, they must have used a kind of smoke bomb- scattering around the roof. "Jeongguk!" You scream, sure he's already seen them but he has the guns, he has both of the guns.

"We warned you to stay away, Jeon!" One man yells.

A woman laughs. "You're just that greedy, aren't you?"

Shots ring out along the roof. You can hear the sirens on the ground increases, someone shouting into a megaphone for order, but there's no order when you're dancing with the devil, no organization or routine to the art of running blindly across an unfamiliar roof, dodging bullets from every direction. You couldn't tell if they were shooting at you or Jeongguk, but you realized then and there that Jeon Jeongguk possessed the deadliest accuracy, as three of their bodies fell to the ground horrifyingly quickly.

"Y/N! Where are you?"

You spot Jeongguk's figure by the door to the staircases again, and you take a deep, unsteady breath before taking off in his direction, gravel crunching beneath your boots. He notices you quickly, aiming his gun at whoever must have been behind you, his expression slowly twisting from neutrally pissed to horror, time slowing down and centering around one pull of a trigger.

Pain erupts in your left shoulder, inconceivable fire exploding throughout your body as you stumble onto your knees, not registering what had happened. Your shoulder feels hot, burning red liquid seeping through your shirt and beginning to drip down your shoulder. Tentatively, your breathing shallow and shaky and your stomach concaving on itself, you press two fingers to your shoulder. They come away covered in blood and the rest of the world comes rushing back to you- shots ringing around the roof, pain numbing your mind and lighting your entire arm on fire.

"Y/N!"

Jeongguk's screaming, absolutely frantic as he trips over his own two feet, momentarily lowering his gun before a shot flies a little close to his face and his resolve returns. He fires with terrifying precision, hitting one, two, three people square in the head and suddenly it's silent on the roof.

"Y/N! Holy shit, Y/N, please-"

Jeongguk falls to his knees beside you, tossing the gun to the ground as his hands hover over your shoulder. He applies pressure where your hand is, face falling at the noises of pain you let out, and looking even more frantic at the whimper that slips past when he lets up. "You're okay, you're going to be okay."

He reaches to his own shirt, tearing a long strip of the fabric away from the hem and wrapping it around your upper shoulder as a tourniquet. "You're going to be okay!"

"Jeongguk," you whisper. The world is spinning, everything is spinning and Jeongguk's voice is nothing more than a shallow ringing in your ears. Your body gives out, slumping against the nearest surface. Warily, you realize that it is Jeongguk's arms, and that he is supporting you from falling against the ground. The door opens with a slam, but to you it sounds like the softest, sweetest embrace. "Fifth floor. Supply closet. Get... get to Surin..."

"Jeon!" A pause, and then, "Oh my God... Y/N?"

"Taehyung!" Jeongguk cries. "Supply closet on the fifth floor, get Surin. Please. Please Taehyung!"

With incredible effort you manage to stand, a sudden surge of strength leading you to your feet. You have to get to Surin; you have to find her. You need to see Taehyung, need to know that he's alive and okay, that his voice a few minutes ago wasn't just a figment of your imagination. Your ears are ringing and your vision spins as you take a couple of unsteady steps, forcing yourself to continue moving, to wrench open the door with your good arm and make for the stairs.

Jeongguk runs at your side, a hand on your shoulder as he fires at anyone rounding the corners. Every dead body you encounter has a black mask covering the majority of their face, similar to the man who'd confronted the two of you in the stairwell. You're determined to make it back to the fifth floor, to find everyone and get the hell out of the building, but your legs give out somewhere around the seventh floor, Jeongguk catching you before you can hit the ground hard.

Jeongguk gets his arm around your back, helping you onto shaky and uncertain feet with great difficulty. Your head lolls against his chest, your good arm yanked around his shoulders for an attempt at stability, but as Jeongguk leads you to the door and your legs give out on you three times, he gives up and hooks your legs over his arm, carrying you down the remaining staircase. It's slower than he would have liked, bodies and slick blood making the journey treacherous. The rooms and hallways are dark, your head too muffled to try and discern if they're supposed to be void of color.

"Jeon... gguk..."

"Don't try to speak," Jeongguk begs, sounding breathless and terrified. He barks orders to someone you can't see. Your shoulder feels cold. Someone shouts. Jeongguk adjusts your body in his arms, and fires three bullets in a direction. "Fucking- dammit!"

Jeongguk doesn't go through the front doors, of that much you're certain. Instead, he keeps running down the stairs until he reaches the basement garage center. It's cold and damp, windy, and it's becoming more and more difficult to keep your eyes open. A sleek black car speeds up to where Jeongguk is standing, the back door opening as it comes to a screeching halt.

"Boss, let's go-!"

He helps you into the car as quickly as he can without jostling your injured shoulder, and despite your best efforts to sit up; you immediately crumple against the window. Jeongguk gently tugs so that you're resting your weight on him instead as the car tears out of the garage.

"Get us to the warehouse, Yugyeom. You know the place."

"Yes, Jeon."

"Y/N." You think that's Jeongguk's hand on your cheek. "Y/N, I know it's hard but try to stay awake. Please. Listen to my voice, okay? We're getting you to someone who can help-"

"Jeongguk... I..."

Your vision fades to black.

The first time you fade back into consciousness, you're crashing; like a ship being dragged brutally beneath the surface as you listen to two spirits decide your future. You can't open your eyes, but you can feel a hand clenched tightly around yours.

"Can you treat her or not?"

"You know I can, sir-"

"Sir was my father. Help her."

"...Jeon, it's a risk. I need to get the bullet out, and I don't have any proper equipment here-"

"I don't fucking care. Treat her. Now."

"Hold down her legs, Jeon. This isn't going to be pretty."

Newfound pain slithers through every nerve of your body, centered on your left shoulder as something small and pointed digs into your wound. You think you scream, but the noise sounds so inhuman, so foreign to you, that you can't be sure.

You can be sure you're thrashing, can be sure of something holding down your legs, screaming and begging for you to calm down. Your nails scrape against flesh, someone curses in your ear, and the pain increases in your shoulder.

You black out again.

Your body feels like a lead weight. There is uncomfortable pressure at points on each of your limbs, preventing you from moving in the slightest. Your head is heavy, a splitting headache threatening to rip your skull in half.

Someone touches your cheeks with startling gentleness, wiping fingers beneath your eyes. The pain is too much, so much that you think death would be kinder than this, than this horrible burning sting in your shoulder.

"What pain meds do you have?"

There's a long, unbearably silent pause. "Morphine, Jeon."

"Where is it?"

"There are incredible risks that come along with it-"

"That is not what I asked. Is it the money? I'll pay you triple that my father used to pay you. Make. Her pain. Go. Away."

And then, you're floating into sleep again.

"Let me in there! Let me in the fucking room! That's my fucking sister!"

At least this time you can wiggle your toes, but one of your hands is trapped within the confines of someone else's. Mm, but the pain is nothing more than an afterthought, diluted and dulled to the back of your mind.

You giggle quietly, your head lolling to the side.

"Y/N?" That's Jeongguk's voice, you think. "Y/N, I'm here-"

Sleep is too enticing to pass up.

The first time you open your eyes, it's nearly pitch black in the room. Your body feels heavy, unbearably so, and there's a dull, painful ache in your shoulder. It must be what woke you up, pins and needles poking at your skin. You whimper as you turn your head, sore and burdensome from such little use, your shoulder stinging like a bitch as you move.

Your tongue is dry, your head too heavy to try and lift. Moving your toes, you let a little sigh of relief escape when you confirm that yes, you can still move the rest of your body. But the pleasant lightness and floating feeling is gone, and you desperately miss it.

"Help-" You croak, wincing at the rough drag of your voice. You just want the pain to go away.

"Y/N?" You're just barely able to look to your right, to see Jeongguk sitting by the table you've been laid on, his hand holding tight to yours. His eyes, dry and red, nearly glow in the dim lighting, making you believe he hasn't slept in weeks. "Are you awake?"

Your tongue is dry and heavy in your mouth, and it takes you too long to form a proper sentence. "Is blistering pain my new reality?"

"Yeah, you're awake."

"Where's Taehyung?"

"In the hideout with Surin. He'll stop by again in the morning."

You whimper. "Jeongguk, it hurts."

His eyes soften imperceptibly. "I know, Y/N. I know." He turns away from you. "Doc, where are those painkillers?"

The doctor speaks from behind you, "Jeon, I really don't think that's a good idea. There's a very high chance of addiction, and we've given her some already."

"I'll consider your opinion," Jeongguk spits, "When you go to proper medical school. But until then, and for as long as it's my fucking blood money paying your bills, you do what I say. Understand?"

"Yes, Jeon."

"Jeongguk- Surin-"

"She's okay," Jeongguk promises, stroking his thumb over the back of your hand. "We'll go home soon. Think you can wake up tomorrow? Taehyung really wants to see you."

Your head is pounding; body sore and tired and you want nothing more than to sleep and never wake up. "I'll try."

"I know. Y/N, those men-"

Taehyung's voice rings into the room, "Is she awake?"

"Tae?" Jeongguk startles. "Where's Surin?"

"With Bogum. I'm going to kick your fucking ass, Jeon," Taehyung says. "And then we're going to find out who those men worked for, and kill all of them, too."

Something pricks your arm, and pleasantly warm syrup begins to flow into your veins. You sigh in blessed relief, a dopey smile on your lips as you relax against the bed.

"Well, Taehyung," Jeongguk whispers. "I might have a lead on that."

You fall asleep again with Jeongguk and Taehyung each holding one of your hands, a grounding of your body even as your mind floats far away from the pain.

Words don't come to you for the longest time. You can't tell how long you've been awake for, the pain in your shoulder not yet unbearable as you lay still, watching the sun begin to paint the sky with muted orange and yellow colors. There are hands holding both of yours. Earlier, you heard Jeongguk and Taehyung speaking, before their voices had tapered off when they figured they should let you sleep. But you had been awake for a while now.

Carefully, you squeeze your fingers, watching as the silhouettes at your bedside startle. Someone, you think it's Taehyung, eagerly squeezes your hand back.

"Love," that's Taehyung. "Love, are you with us?"

"Mm," you sigh. "I think so? Everything aches."

Jeongguk lets go of your hand. "Your body's going to be sore for a while. I'm so, so sorry Y/N. If I could go back and take that bullet-"

"You couldn't have known," you say. Are you slurring? It feels like none of your words are making sense. "Where... where are we?"

"We're still in Taiwan," Jeongguk says. "I know someone here, someone who could heal you faster than any hospital around. I've got people working my contacts around here. We'll likely be able to leave as soon as you feel like you're able."

"Tae?" You whine, tipping your head up as Taehyung stands to hover by the head of your bed, pushing the hair away from your face with his warm hand. "Are you-?"

"I'm okay," Taehyung assures you. He smiles gently, and you can't help but match the gesture. "I'm okay. And Surin's perfectly fine. You did the right thing hiding her away like that."

"Good. About what happened-"

"I don't want to discuss that here," Jeongguk interjects. "We can talk about it when you're feeling stronger, okay? I'll get Jihoon, find out when your next dosage should be. How's your shoulder?"

"Hurts." You wince slightly. "A lot."

Jeongguk frowns, not saying anything else before he leaves the room.

"You should sleep again, Y/N." Taehyung says, still stroking through your hair. It's soothing and nice, his touch always warmer than the general temperature of your skin. You find yourself melting back into the bed, catching up to the sleep that had been eluding you for the last few hours. Taehyung sounds far away when he speaks again, your eyes closing slowly. "Everything's going to be okay. I promise you. We're gonna catch the bastards that did this, and then we're going to kill each and every one of them."