#i dont really see what the issue w using the word 'binary' is

[transmaverique]

gonna be honest I see anyone talking about this "my gender is more complicated than yours" shit as someone who genuinely cannot comprehend that other people that don't share certain traits with them can still in fact have rich interior lives. as an agender trans woman who uses she/her I've never had anyone say it to me who wasn't (usually unknowingly) transmisogynistic

see but im not talking about "rich interior lives" and the assumption that i am is exactly what im talking about. i am talking about the actual physical way that reality treats and percieves me in comparison to the way it treats and percieves you. saying my gender is "more complex" means to me that i am physically incapable of existing in a strictly binary world and that there is no thing i can pass as bc "binary man" and "binary woman" are both incorrect for me. and the Cisiety in question does not allow androgyny to exist - it is exclusively the timeframe people have to decide whether they think you are a cisman or a ciswoman, or a failure and a freak. i dont subscribe to that "binary privilege" shit, thats not how privilege works. but there are differences in the ways both you and i can navigate this strictly binary Cisiety!!! and those differences deserve to be named, imo

like. again. i dont have to comfort you about your own internal sense of gender before youll listen to me about my experiences in the real world as genderqueer. as a different sort of transsexual than you.

(and bc i Know what binary ppl love to say: i know not everyone is 'capable of passing'. what i am talking about specifically is the difference between being unable to pass as a cis woman or a cis man vs being unable to pass bc what i am does not exist AT ALL in a binary society, and both of those things are incorrect ans unattainable.)

(anyways if that language is too imperfect for you thats like fine but. its just confusing to me, i dont get why its hard to understand what we are talking about here. our experiences w our nonbinary genders are completely different! why do i have to discuss them like theyre the same?)

[mulcibere]

whats good, @worldfathered​ / @telekidd​ / @blvescreen​ / @sbyirw​ ?  you ugly piece of shit.

you don’t know me, but i sure as hell know you. i’m making this post because you’ve repeatedly been transphobic and either react w/aggression or flat out ignore us when we come to you. not to mention your whole fiasco w the eatin disorders thing that’ll be covered under the cut. :)

first of all, you got a trans verse. what the fuck is up with that?

+ proof that your trans tag exists:

you know, surprisingly enough, my life as a trans man isnt glamorous or much different from a cis person’s. i live, i laugh, i act like a mess sometimes, i feel emotions, i try new things. only difference? i don’t agree w/what i was assigned w/ at birth and im struggling w it. do you know how difficult it is for the trans community when ppl like you do shit like this? do you know how many fucking times ive had ppl come to me TELLING ME im followin a damn trend bc of bull shit like this? make your character trans or dont. don’t make a whole verse for it. it’s not that hard to do. and why are you changing your whole fc? do you really need a whole new fuckin faceclaim for a trans character? lol trans verses are transphobic. the fact that you felt the need to make a whole separate verse for your muse to be trans makes my head fuckin hurt. here’s a post that nicely sums up WHY these sorts of verses are transphobic.

and if this was all you got from people contacting you about this issue, you really havent been listenin to us and tryna cooperate and work things out as calmly as we have been. but hey, we’re just bein big and evil, huh? my bad.

btw, if you’re genderfluid, you’re trans! you makin a separate verse for your muse to be trans even though your muse is CANONICALLY GENDERFUILD is transphobic, regardless of if you’re trans or not. you’re saying non binary people aren’t trans and are excluding them. and i got sent in a screencap of someone discussing this and it words exactly what im trying to say perfectly:

in case you delete anythin, we got this handy dandy link: https://web.archive.org/web/20180304230604/http://bittenkid.co.vu/post/165345023694/you-have-a-trans-verse

and someone DID come to you today, and i’ll give you points, you were civil about it.

but honestly, you even respondin, much less in a civil way is surprising as fuck to me, seeing as when people approach you and you give no response:

but

when you do respond when people approach you, react like this. real mature, huh? “special snow flake triggered ass” are you fuckin serious? is this how you react to people approaching you in a calm manner? speaking out over those you upset and callin them “special snowflakes?” if you honestly respond to conflict and concern like this, i really do pray for you and how you fair in real life situations.

and again.

calling trans people and others special snowflakes. for being upset with you and trying to speak with you about it.

and again. with the aggression. you surely see a reoccurring theme here, don’t you? i sure do.

and this as well. “hating this website” for people coming to you and tryna tell you what you did was wrong is just so mean, right?

and again with “triggered”, aka, people trying to discuss things with you and you actin completely unreasonable and painting us as the bad guys for bein genuinely hurt and trying to seek reconciliation. even with a video attached!

http://bittenkid.co.vu/post/165349873779/welcome-to-tumblr-dot-com-where-you-cant-have-nice

if you delete that post, i got it uploaded real nice here as well! https://www.dropbox.com/s/pd47gs3l1s4s7ct/video.mov?dl=0

we had someone message you politely askin for an apology for usin these terms and reactin how you have and you know what you did? blocked em.

so tell me, why is it that when we come to you politely, wantin to talk things out like adults in IMs, you always respond w/ calling us special snowflakes, triggered jokes (making fun of and slandering people w/ trauma, may i add! as someone with diagnosed trauma, im not down with the triggered jokes), postin about us, blocking us, and being aggressive? doesn’t seem very reasonable, does it? and yet we’re the ones bein unreasonable for being genuinely upset? bummer.

and another thing is that you’ve been pretty fishy with eating disorders and mental health as well. wanna explain that?

n then youve obviously been postin concernin enough stuff to get someone to contact you abt it, and you react like this?

you continually reply with aggression.

 listen sans, im a forgivin dude. i believe in redemption. i believe people can be a better person if they wanna be. so all im literally askin is for you to listen to us. cooperate with us. stop calling us names and acting aggressive when we try approaching you about this. don’t continually try and shut us down we we try and try and try to talk with you about this.

for the record, we arent harassing you. we’ve been coming to you as calmly and as civil as we possibly can. but you responding with aggression and calling us special snowflakes or not even respondin at all is why we’re done puttin up w/you. we’re done bein treated as doormats n bein walked over like one by you lol. you wanna know why we havent contact you when it happens? because you respond like this. just open your heart and listen to what people gotta say, man.

i really am praying for you and i hope that one day you change your heart enough to open up.

[afraidofchange]

chasingparamasturbatoryillusions replied to your post “oh and not to mention like the term “lesbian” encompasses a LOT of...”

^^That. But also from an ace standpoint, like, if those things line up and there’s a word, use the freaking word. We know what you mean. The only reason I have it that way on my multi is to have the same standard across muses — but I could probably think of a better way to do it and change that.

Yeah, like, someone saying they’re an asexual lesbian or a non binary gay person - that makes sense because lesbian and gay indicate attraction to a specific group (women and men in this instance), while including the other facets of their identity that are individual (they are asexual but still have attraction to women; they’re a non binary person with attraction to men, etc etc).

But when the split attraction model is applied to non-asexual folks (who may desire a second identifier like above), it’s really harmful to people in that it can make them feel forced to identify one way or another when in reality, it’s not so clear cut. Like, to suggest that someone is “heterosexual biromantic” implies a strict division of oh, only sex w the “opposite” gender, but romances both “same” and “opposite” but refuses sex with one group? like it’s contradictory, for one, and damaging for two when people who are still learning about themselves and are trying to date others (because then the “others” in this equation may be hurt because Oh I Can’t Have Sex With You (where in general if sex was the  issue then... they could just ID as asexual because that’s a Thing that Exists)

This is a little convoluted and I’m not trying to outright tell people DONT IDENTIFY THIS WAY!!! - I’m saying in the context of the RPC that it isn’t realistic. Idk about you but i’ve never met an non ace person who identified irl with a split attraction model openly - rather they say, you know “I’m gay” “i’m bi”, etc etc etc. 

There are other posts out there that explain it better but I can’t find them off hand, but it’s just.... tiring to see especially in the context of lesbian and gay characters because there’s a word for it and it covers a wide area of same gendered attraction. 

[trickstarbrave]

ppl are still rly mad abt this post, but i figure ill restate it in longer words to have it ‘make more sense’ cause you all cant think

my body is not “incorrect”. it has things wrong with it, but it is not wrong. because no matter WHAT i do with it it will stay the same body. i dont really like the mentality of “no matter what you do your body was a mistake, something that should have never happened, and you will be broken your whole life regardless of any hormones, surgery, treatment, medication, and devices to help you get around. 

secondly this post is about oppression see, thats why i put the word ‘transphobia’ in there. and if i get on hormones, get every surgery possible, and look like a perfect passing cis man, i will never be that. it doesnt matter if i throw any feminine things i own in the garbage (let alone the fact cis men are being encouraged now to wear makeup and garbage but suddenly im the issue here), i will never be cis. nor will i be a binary person at all. and guess what? people will find out. people who look through my records will see it. my family will know about it and disown me for it. i could lose jobs over it, or housing, or as the current US administration wants it--i can be denied medical care under the basis of ‘religious freedom’. my body is not the issue with my oppression, society is the issue with my oppression. 

same thing with disability, i have a genetic disorder. its often times incredibly painful, not to mention scary bc jfc i cant even get in for further testing to see if i have the type that makes it so your organs and arteries can spontaneously explode. i cant fucking walk properly. im not sitting here and telling you “uwu i dont need anything from medicine!!!!!!!!!” im sitting here telling you there is NOTHING to make this go away. i will never, in my life, be able to walk properly from here on out. a light walk without a cane is doable with limited pain. long distances are impossible without getting a horrific limp and gait. i need a wheelchair for anything intensive. these are issues with my body 

however: it is not ‘my fault’ i cant get a wheelchair up places with no ramp. its not ‘my fault’ i cant fucking get on a bus properly at my university. its not ‘my fault’ people block the wheelchair accessible doors. its not my fault i have to choose between getting to class in pain or showing up everywhere 20-30 minutes late in my chair while being made to feel like a burden to everyone else around me. i deserve to participate in social situations as much as able bodied people can. this isnt ‘asking for special treatment’ because i am asking for the exact same shit other people already fucking get. 

my body has things wrong with it but my body itself is not a mistake. i should be able to correct things and get around without hatred, discrimination, and shame, because until oppressive systems are dismantled, no matter how much i try to pass as cis and able bodied i will never actually be treated as equal to my cis and able bodied peers. it doesnt matter how much i focus on changing those things, i cannot bend reality. i will still need hormones, and surgery, and my cane and wheelchair, medication, and physical therapy (which is a bitch to get into rn). those things DONT SOLVE OPPRESSION! BUT I NEED THEM!

but sure w/e lie and say im saying “I DONT WANT HORMONES OR SURGERY AND I THINK MY BODY WHICH HAS ORGANS THAT CAN EXPLODE AT ANY MOMENT IS PERFECT AND EVERYONE SHOULD NEVER SEE A DOCTOR OR GET HELP EVER UWU” because thats so much easier to argue and talk down to than addressing the actual points of removing transphobia and ableism (and everything else actually) from society. because none of you care about doing that. you care about putting words in the mouth of someone disabled and trans. you care more about your own narrative of self loathing for pity from cisgender people, while acting tough and only ‘calling out transphobia’ by saying other trans people are cis (though i see none of you calling out your transphobic anti-sjw followers funny how that is) 

(also im not taking ‘critical responses’ on this post that ignore my actual main points. if you say anything about ‘entitlement’ and ‘fake trans people’ and ‘your body IS broken tho!!! here is why you NEED to buy into my narrative of your life or youre lying!’ i will not respond seriously. either you take this seriously or dont bother responding at all)