#i felt like if i couldn't chestfeed then i couldn't feed him
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i will never psychologically recover from yellowjackets s2ep6
#sunbun speaks#yellowjackets#kinda a joke kinda not#it did trigger me to hell and back#*spoilers*#cause when i gave birth to my son he struggled to latch or feed on my chest#and bottle feeding nearly drowned him because of how hard he sucked and how he just didn't breathe#and all the doctors and nurses tried everything to help him latch#i felt like if i couldn't chestfeed then i couldn't feed him#so Shauna's anxiety and panic and desperation was all too real for me#the only difference is that my son finally learned to drink from a bottle and he lived#but he's still a literal infant so the episode just had me holding him and sobbing#it was so hard to watch my worst nightmare as a mother played out for almost an hour#sidenote: i was aware that the baby was going to die in the show#i had already seen that spoiler. but i thought it was a quick stillbirth scene not like an hour of misery#so i knew he was going to die i just didn't anticipate how LONG it was taking to get there#and normally I'm unaffected by horror but I'm still suffering from PPD PPA and PPP#and experience delusions where my son is hurt/dead so yeah#i was not given a proper trigger warning for the episode despite knowing that the baby dies
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