#i gotta catch up on my writing... on my anime watchlist... on my video games like fuck i havent touched a console in MONTHS

[weebsinstash]

Hey sorry to pester you and feel free to ignore this if it's annoying or 12 billion people have already asked but how far percentage-wise are you in writing the new chapter for BOAL? Sorry if this is annoying 😭

Gosh dude I keep trying to answer this ask without making it hella long by adding all these unnecessary details about "oh I feel bad I haven't written in ages blah blah blah, been prescribed new meds that might be helping, something something I just had my surgery for my other leg so hopefully I'll get something written while I'm being a sloth and recovering" so on so forth

Basically I've been real ass unproductive, I keep having these not-sure-if-it's-mania-but-could-be-mania emotional upswings and downswings where I'm either making so many WIPs I don't know what to work on to just. not doing shit, and obviously that's just in terms of writing. I've been having other personal issues that I've touched on before in probably a little too much detail 😅

Anyways, imma be honest and say The Storm is like, maybe slightly over halfway done, with the next chapter being, gosh, mostly unwritten. There have been some tweaks and shit done just off the cuff along the way which is another reason I haven't been super proactive in writing just because I kinda worry im going to dig myself a hole of inconsistent writing and odd choices and having to change things to be consistent because I didn't fully think an earlier decision through or--- basically im massively overthinking it and kneecapping my potential with anxiety

But I've actually been thinking about the series and just writing in general a lot lately so. No promises but I hope to get SOMETHING worked on soon because I do really like writing 🥺 also like im unemployed right now which isn't great obviously but for my mental health it's been pretty good so... yeah! Hopefully I get something out eventually. I'm in a leg cast for at least 4 weeks so that's at least 4 weeks of me being able to take it easy and hopefully get some shit done

So yeah! These upcoming chapters are going to have a lot of emotion and action in them and I have to kind of find the balance to strike with that, which has been, uh, intimidating for me. But yeah! I just need to tell myself I'm writing as a hobby and it's not like I'm writing a college paper or an academic essay lr something and that I gotta stop always trying to like. I dunno. Try and make my stuff as "perfect" as possible

Also like sometimes the performances of being a content creator gets exhausting so I kind of needed a break from that for a few months. Obviously I know I don't have to and I'm not required or obligated or being forced but I feel guilty when I "can't provide for my following" and then that can develop into like, weird habits and mindsets of putting the pleasure of internet strangers above myself when I'm literally writing for my own enjoyment and really the point of publishing it is just so I can be told "oh this was fun to read, good job!" to get extra enjoyment out of what I've written

But yeah dude you're not being annoying! I think I needed a break from writing and publishing for a while and im trying to ease back into it at a comfortable pace so I don't get overwhelmed so... I guess stay tuned and hopefully something will happen soon 😌