#i gotta relisten tot the first eps of taz

[babsaros]

my first dnd campaign started heres how we did on our first game tonight lmao

we all met at a bar, “because it always starts in a bar” to quote the dm

our party is me (cowboy paladin), a cowboy fighter who was way tougher and had a way better  cowboy accent than me and drove us around on his mule cart, a very vain drow elf sorcerer that made a fool of himself a couple times, a very friendly gnome that said we were his best friends after knowing us for five minutes and was generally tolerated, and a guy that did most of our damage with his badass sword

we all got fucking wasted the first five seconds bc nobody was comfortable enough with each other to actually roleplay yet

and then we sat at a bounty board and argued about which bounty to take and only decided once the drow elf has talked himself in a complete 180

we got like 3 miles out of town and then there was a giant octopus in the sky

the gnome was also riding on the cowboy fighter’s back most of the time btw, bc he got drunk after one beer and the fighter was the one to wake him up and become his first best friend

so the drow elf identifies this thing as “hentai” and the fighter immediately shoots a crossbow at it

roll initiative lmao

the gnome tries to make peace with the octopus by hugging a tentacle

i swoop in to save him from the other 7 tentacles about to smash him, miss with my attack, and the octopus yanks my sword away.

the gnome immediately turns around, pulls off some badass sword acrobatics and gets my sword back. Coney is having a rough day.

the fighter keeps shooting it with the crossbow until the octopus strikes back and one-shots him into the fuckin dirt and then grabs him up and just fucking inks everywhere.

the drow elf is on the outskirts of the ink cloud trying to get the ink stains out of his clothes

dm let everybody who cast a spell describe what it looked like and let the sword guy who finally killed the octopus describe his sick finishing move

i let the gnome and the sword guy sit for a minute trying to do medicine checks and cpr on the fighter before i pulled them out of the way and just healed him. bc i’m a paladin.

drow elf made not-bad calamari. i pulled a mysterious organ out of the octopus. the drow elf took off the octopus’ beak and put it on the gnome like a hat. then the guy playing the gnome mentioned he didn’t know what was meant by beak bc english isn’t his first language and dm sent a gross pic of an octopus beak for him. the sword guy took a tentacle and just put it in his bag.

then we decided to go home bc that was enough for us

on the way home we stopped by the beach and met a bear? made out of sand? and it let us pet him? so now we get to add that little mystery to our to-do list

we woke the mayor up and he met us in his underwear just so we could make him give us gold and tell us he didn’t know y f there was an octopus in the sky. we did some rlly bad persuasion checks so that he’d give the fighter 5 extra gold for almost dying.

we lvled up to lvl 2 wow

all in all it was pretty good. dm was pretty laidback and cool, but he was a little caught off guard bc we had originally planned to play tomorrow and not tonight so he didn’t have some of the shit ready. there were some fun bits but also some awkward silences. i needa get better at actually talking? like my guy has a really laidback personality but still i should actually say some shit more often yanno? but i think we just gotta get more comfortable with each other so we’ll see. also the i gotta fuck around with the program we’re using and figure out how to use it... i think i’m gonna multiclass as a bard too bc the fighter multiclassed as rogue so i’m gonna try to go the healing-protector route.