#i guess additional disclaimer that these arent just high thoughts‚ its stuff i do think sober but cant quite find the words to express | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

gibbearish · 2 years

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on the one hand i know that my cat cannot comptehend that i am staring at him while he poops because i am terrified that ive been accidentally fucking up something about his diet and not because im creeping on him but on the other hand i am fully aware that not only doesnt he not comprehend it, he does not comprehend anything about manners therefore even if he doesnt realize im trying to help him, he literally could not give less of a shit and i'm just a paranoid freak

#my mental health is hmm. in the toilet lately #oh yknow what actually. it might be because ive been having to cut back on my T lately bc of insurance bullshit #welp. good news is my appointment to finally fix that is tomorrow!#bad news i have to get up like an hour earlier than usual bc the earliest appointment they had was 8:30 AM and then get stabbed #and then continue getting stabbed weekly for the rest of my life #ough hadnt uh. fully comprehended that yet #everyone has always told me injections get easier with time but ive gotten. So Many of them and theyve only continued to get worse #like. what if it never gets better yknow #ive had a Lot of extremely painful dental work done‚ like. yknow. traumatizing levels of painful. so while recent injections ive gotten #have. presumably been less painful. it still fuckd me up for a While #idk I'll just. hold on until the six week check in and then if its still fucking me up ill bring up switching to once evey two week doses #and then just. enter triage mode with my mental health #oh yknow what actually you know one perk of shots done at home?#can be done while high #just fuckin tranq myself like a hotse KSNFLSNFLSNDLDN #disclaimer that i would not be doing the injections myself #my bf has said he'll do it if im having trouble #idk. anyways thanks for coming to todays high ocd hormone fluctuation ramble #feel like thats been happening a lot lately #i guess additional disclaimer that these arent just high thoughts‚ its stuff i do think sober but cant quite find the words to express #i have an ongoing paranoia about my loved ones dismissing my genuine thoughts thinking its just some high bs #has it happened yet? no #does my brain take that into consideration? also no #oh *horse

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