#i had been learning water caustics for 3d art and i loved to watch them
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April 28, 2023
Despite everything, it's still you.
#me#ive cut back on lifting a lot due to injuries and struggles with my joints and instead picked up lane swimming in march#i had never used a public pool in my life and never swam with intent before#it was new and kind of terrifying but i needed to move my body again in a way that didnt cause pain#the first few times were pretty rough- i couldnt swim well or hold my breath and struggled with the repetitive motion and breathing#one day beams of sunlight shone through the airy space and large windows and cast shining watery reflections on the pool's bottom#i had been learning water caustics for 3d art and i loved to watch them#its gotten a lot easier now and i can let my mind wander and enjoy the sensations instead of worrying about drowning#the cool water on my skin#the muffled amniotic sounds of bubbling fluids#the mosaic tiles and patterns#the sunlight and caustics#every time i go its a social stress test- but I've gotten better at handling it and it helps me connect with other people in a tiny way#i dont know what the future of my body's training will look like as i plow into middle age#but im proud of myself for doing something totally new and finding joy in it
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